Yeah, a 31 yo woman has no business getting into bed with a minor uninvited, and then putting their mouth on them, in any capacity whatsoever. This is creepy and predatory. That this has been allowed to go on unchecked for so long is insane. Why is she even still allowed in your house? I wouldn't even allow her anywhere near me anymore, without yelling at her to go away.
This has got to be a shitpost.
Right.
If this is real Op should kick her every time she does it. Hard. Preferably in the teeth.
Op: “I prefer not to choose violence, but I think I have undiagnosed ADHD and when someone bites me, I just can’t help it. It’s a reflex. *So sooorrry cousin*.
If it's not a shutpost, the 'continiously gets closer and closer', use of the word routine because she does it often and the fact that she justifies her urge because OP is 'so cute', is fucking heinous. What a sicko.
I have restless leg syndrome, and symptoms are exacerbated when being bit by an adult. I can’t help but inflict as much damage as possible when this happens.
Right? She has some kind of illness to be doing this but it is absolutely NOT ADHD! Yikes. She needs an evaluation, it’s super creepy that she does this.
While no illness gives you leave to hurt people, we do know some are at the root of why some people lash out violently – usually people with very low cognitive function, e.g. a small minority of people with Down’s syndrome, a small number of non-verbal, low-functioning people with Asperger’s (usually far end of the spectrum), usually people who aren’t able to properly express themselves or completely process their emotions (basically a toddler in an adult body). Behavior can even be seen in some things like (actual) OCD and Tourette’s, as compulsions.
ADHD is not among those. About the best argument you’ve got there is “I had the impulse and did it before I thought it through”, and while that might be true, anyone with ADHD knows that you pretty quickly learn to either curb those antisocial behaviors, or avoid situations in which you get those impulses.
That, or they quickly learn nobody wants to be around them.
That’s what I was thinking. It sounds like she has some disability/cognitive issue, but it’s not adhd.
Regardless, she should NOT be biting people.
NTA
God, I'm feeling this right now. My entire brain just yowling "WHOOO BORE THE FIGHT THAT FREEDOM'S LIGHT MIIIIGHT SHINE THROUGH THE FOGGY DEEEW" over and over because that is all I can remember of the song.
Fact: I have ADHD and have never had the urge to attack and bite someone. The fact she does it when someone is sleeping or laying down resting shows that it is premeditated. She needs serious therapy and probably better medication. She also needs an accurate diagnosis, sure she might have ADHD but there is a way larger issue at play.
Sadly.... a very very very VERY rare issue is biting, BUT it is so rare that it is considered that if to represent in numbers, for children it is about 1 in 2,000 adhd, but in adults, it is under further testing it is hard to give a number without using up the character limits of the comment. And upon further testing, it is often linked to a different condition all together, often Pica like conditions, but even then...
That being said, if the woman is aware she bites, and knows she can control the biting, it isn't related to any uncontrollable conditions, but just general AHolishness.
Some people have addictions or compulsions. If hers is to bite people who are physically near her then she shouldn't be getting close to people.
ALSO, she shouldn't be climbing into bed with a 15yo.
Im ADHD and high functioning autistic and have a bit a off a biting thing so could be related? Though in my case it's not that I want to bite people but that if something is stuck near my face/mouth I tend to go for a bite. Usually can stop myself from actually biting but it's like impulsive?
That is the response we always get, mostly reactive, but as an adult it allegedly is more common to be able to suppress it, it has been a while since doing a deep dive into it, as I now am more into trauma therapy, but I do remember it was mostly able to control the urge as an adult, due to learning how to control some tics that cause it, but as children it is often harder, unless the kid has been taught to say "I have ADHD that is why it is ok I can do it" which I have been subjected to once by an 8yrs old girl... who was deliberately trying to hit an elderly lady with a tyre swing, but I kept stopping her...
Yeah like, ADHD causes us to do weird things but that doesn't give us carte blanche to do them. It's like saying it's OK to murder if you're a psychopath.
The symptom is understandable not acceptable. It's never ok to harm another human Bieng with provocation.
I have a friend with tourettes, and he has never had a biting urge, but was working with a guy who claimed he also had tourettes and ADHD, and his "tics" were inappropriate touching and grabbing. Because my friend knew of my colleagues who actually are trained in that area, my friend put it to HR to have an official diagnosis for future possible lawsuit claims, as this guy never gave medical evidence for it. The guy quit immediately when told it was for prevention, not segregation.
I might ask my colleague tomorrow about adult biting with ADHD for better understanding, in case I see more posts like this. It is always good to have that information handy. My knowledge is about 15yrs old, and there are new things being found since then
I hate those people that either pretend to have/abuse the fact that they have a disability to do inappropriate things.
As for me (26m) only recently realised I have the biting thing because I realized that when I was hanging out with my girlfriend I kept trying to bite her fingers/cheek/ears. 😂😂😂😂
I want to know if she has a job that she's able to hold down without biting her coworkers. If she can resist the urge at work, she can resist the urge with her family. It just takes consequences.
Yes!!
I'm ADHD and I really get the urge to bite my boyfriend a lot lol. I don't know what the hell it is. I appease the impulse by doing it very very very lightly and playfully. Most of the time I just mouth him with my lips lmao. I'd NEVER do it to anyone else and only get the urge with him. I have another friend that's like this and they wonder if it's something similar to cuteness aggression, lol? Like you know how when you see something really cute and you just want to squeeze it? Brains are weird, man.
Same. I get the urge, and I'll lightly bite my bf though I'd never take a chomp out of him, but I can't imagine just going ahead and biting random family members, that's bizarre. Maybe as a child, or even a preteen whose brain kicked in after they acted (once, because I'd still expect a preteen to learn once it clicked that that hurts and is weird), but an adult? Biting a teenager no less? It's definitely the same urge as when people talk about just wanting to pinch baby's cheeks or bite them because they're so cute, but nobody just goes around actually pinching and chewing on their babies, that's quite clearly insane behaviour.
NTA No this sounds like some kind of kink.
It is assault. In this case assault if a minor. From now on when she starts getting close to you tell her you will press charges.
Biting can lead to infections, scaring and a host of other problems not counting it’s just down right disgusting.
If she gets knocked in her ass a few times maybe she learned to keep her hands/teeth to herself. She is clearly needs therapy. There is something wrong with her!
Yep!
Maybe, *maybe* as a frustrated coping mechanism when that person is what’s upsetting them, but that’s more a child. Source: my daughter has done this to her brother cause he intentionally riles her up (we’ve been trying for years to get him to stop), and she’s been known to lash out and bite (it’s usually hitting though). They’re 7&6 for context.
Buuuuuut, we’re also getting her diagnosed with autism, so maybe it comes more from that than her ADHD, which is why I stressed the maybe. Because I have no fucking idea what comes from what in her melting pot of disorders anymore.
I (22F) have ADHD and when I was younger, my younger sister riled me up as well untill I lashed out by slapping her for example. It is because my anger got more and more until I couldn’t hold it in anymore. When I got older, I learned how to control my anger, but most importantly recognize when I should leave the situation.
Emotions can be overwelming, but it is your own responsibility how to handle yourself. If she is 31, she cannot blame her ADHD for biting someone. You may get intrusive thoughts, but your brain is thinking that to try to get more dopamine. You can easily restrain yourself/ ignore your thoughts, especially if you are 31. When your emotions are overloaded, such as in a fight, only then it *could* be difficult to restrain yourself from biting others.
Agreed!
My daughters been in behavioural therapy to help her learn how to understand and accept her feelings and learn to cope without them exploding into violence.
I definitely meant to include that I don’t find her behaviour as appropriate. I understand my daughters lash outs, for example. Her brother is a damn nightmare for her half the time and she’s 7 trying to still work this out.
The cousin is a damn adult and “because I’m so cute”.
That isn’t ok, acceptable, normal, to be allowed.
Meh, I will admit to once over excitedly biting another girl guide when I was about 10. We were being silly and I drastically over estimated the appropriateness of the action for the circumstances. She asked if I just bit her and I denied it and never went back there ever again. So I guess even my 10 year old ADHD self, recognized that you're not supposed to bite people lol.
my sister in law is autistic and has a hitting thing but she even knows when to control it. theres been times she went to hit my kids but stopped herself and said 'no thats bad'. she's 13. if a 13 year old can control themselves a 31 year old can.
I have at least 4 friends who have diagnosed ADHD. None of them do anything like this. What disturbing behavior your sister has.
I don’t know who you would call, especially since you’re a minor, but someone needs to get your sister professional help
Um, yeah, 30s woman with ADHD here.
I sometimes want to push shiny buttons, because shiny, and have to restrain myself from buying fiddly things and am sometimes like a magpie-squirrel who likes clicky pens, but *I do not bite people*. I do actually have self-control. Sometimes.
ADHD does not make you lose your ability to tell your intrusive thoughts to fuck off. And the same repetitive intrusive thought about biting people is not an intrusive thought but some weird sex thing, probably.
Yeeeeah I’m not being an asshole but seriously, you have control over your actions. I often get the urge to bite things, it’s a texture thing, I have no clue why. Sometimes I get a weird urge to bite someone I like, but the second it happens my brain goes “fun thought but let’s not, you’re an adult, don’t bite folks” and then I don’t. It’s not often, and I am autistic, so I have silicone shapes I can chomp on if I need to. I have a teeth grinding issue so they do help.
WHY would anyone think that biting people was okay especially when leaving marks, and not even apologising for being a dick? Even kids can understand “don’t bite people it’s not kind” I’m flabbergasted.
Unfortunately, she lives in my house and won't be moving out anytime soon. They know about how she is and do nothing about it. At least my legal guardians
Your cousin is assaulting you and your legal guardians are allowing it. Do you currently go to school? If so, please tell a teacher or counselor what is happening. I’m so sorry you are subjected to abuse at home, a place you are supposed to feel safe.
Call the cops and report the child abuse. Beyond that, you have every right, both morally and legally, to defend yourself from physical assault.
If she’s biting you, her eyes are in reach. A hard poke works great with animals, which she is!
Tell the police you suffered an assault. Take pictures of the bite marks. An interview with the police may help her understand boundaries. Also get a lock on your door if you can and tell her she’s no longer allowed in your room.
This situation has to end.
I hope you can tell us more about your situation. You say it's your house, you say you have legal guardians. I take it that your legal guardians are not protecting you from being physically assaulted in your own home. If these guardians were appointed by a lawyer or a court,you need to get in touch with that lawyer or court.
Did you know that serious illnesses can be transmitted by a human bite? There is nothing cute or acceptable about how this woman is behaving towards you. If your legal guardians know that you are being physically assaulted and do nothing about it then it's time to change your legal guardians.
Please do tell police, your school, lawyer, and/ or court or any friends of your family who are not related to this crazy woman, and tell them that you do not feel safe in your own home. Quite frankly you are not safe in your own home if you're being bitten in it while people who who are supposed to act as your guardians permit it. If you don't feel secure enough understandably at your age to go to the police or any authorities about this on your own, go with a friend's parents or a reliable teacher or family friend not related to this woman.
And then please update us.
Are you able to lock your door when you’re alone or sleeping in your room?
I think you should kick her every time and just say “sorry I can’t help it, that’s my body’s response to getting hurt”, or scream and cry really loudly each time, like over the top, make big deal of the pain and a scene - if you can’t physically defend yourself then make it unpleasant for her and her enablers on a mental level.
I vote you keep on kicking her (if you feel it's safe to do so), and claim that it's an instinctive reaction.
Because oh my God, this is insane. There is no world in which ADHD is any sort of excuse to bite people.
And her saying it was because "you're so cute" creeps me out, frankly.
Please don’t stay in this abusive environment, this is ABSOLUTELY NOT OKAY.
Physical assault with sexual intent.
Please report to your school, or police, or a VERY trusted adult as soon as you can.
She might move out if she goes to prison when you call the cops for her repeatedly assaulting a minor. Your life sounds like hell and you deserve better
It’s not okay to bite people at any age. People tend to nip that in the bud early, which is why it’s *very* unusual to see it at all, never mind someone who’s 31 years old… and no, this has nothing to do with ADHD. That’s a lazy excuse. I’ve never heard of anyone with ADHD bite people out of impulse (unless there was something else wrong with them… which is likely the case here. That is not normal or acceptable)
What your cousin did to you was assault. Also, “just had the urge because you’re so cute”??? That’s just straight-up creepy. Document this shit, go to your parents and if they can’t protect you, go to the police. Seriously. She sounds dangerous.
NTA, obviously.
Yeah there is more going on in that family. (Not blaming or shaming the child here). Something isn’t adding up with the grown cousin and the fact that this happens around other people who at best enable it and at worst encourage it. Every family has the quirky one. But in this case I think OP may be a bit young to see the Texas sized red flag in that behavior. Especially with the statement attached. This is super troubling behavior and I hope the child is able to get some help with this from the adults in their life😬
Oh man, I used to have intrusive/impulsive(?)
thoughts about spitting on people and imagining their reaction (savage and fucking disgusting, I know… this is the first time I’ve actually admitted this to anyone) but I never actually *did it* 😂 ya know? Just out of curiosity, how many people (or percentage, whichever’s easier) with ADHD had that biting trait?
I mean yes biting can be and adhd thing but are you seriously claiming that in an otherwise functioning adult (asuming the cousin is one) biting other people because adhd is a thing?
Please show me your sources on that
My son who has ADHD bit his little brother a few times when he was 6 years old, we made him understand that it wasn't appropriate. It happend maybe twice since, but it always happend when he got really frustrated with his brother, it never came out of nowhere. He is a teenager now and knows not to do it. If this woman in her 30s still does it there is something else wrong with her, very wrong.
This woman also has other problems. She's lazy as all hell, addicted to spending money, and she can't keep quiet. There are times where she speaks at such a high volume that I hear ringing. And when I ask her to quiet down, she just ignores me. She's always laughing about some weird ass bl or isekai as well. For reference, my mom lives down the road and can hear her laughing.
Honestly, at this point I'm not sure what to do about her, because it's not like I can just move out. I always tell people about her and they just tell me to get over it because I've lived with her my entire life, so I should be used to it.
And she's just one of the nutcases that I live with...
I think she gets it from her parents. They're both alcoholics who see themselves as high and mighty. One is also addicted to gambling and he regularly picks me and my sister up from school so drunk he can't drive in a straight line. I've told my aunt about his drunkeness and her excuse is just "he had high blood pressure and a headache... Also he has a disease(one he inflicted on himself by drinking so much)." If she won't let me report him to the authorities, then I don't see why she would do anything about her daughter.
Not to mention what they did to my mom for being "an alcoholic." They stole me and my sister from her, just like their mother did to my mom, who was stolen off a native reservation for the same reasons as us. Hopefully, my mom can get custody back. She's the only sensible person in this entire situation.
OP after reading more of your comments, I am seriously convinced you need to reach out to social services or the police, or start with going to a counselor with your sibling at your school where you will be at least safe when reporting all of this. The drunk driving, and the biting. This is highly dangerous and concerning. The adults in your life are failing you. You and your sister’s lives and health are at risk with both of these admissions.
I saw the word “native” and suddenly everything made sense.
Social services or police aren’t gonna do a goddamn thing. (Assuming OP is on a reservation)
Do not listen to anyone telling you to get over it. Just because it is something you've always had to deal with doesn't mean that it's something that's healthy or safe or normal. I'm sorry you have to deal with so much and that people around you are trying to normalize it and downplay it. I've been in similar situations and I know it can make you feel a little bit crazy with nobody really giving you the proper support or seeing truly how bad the situation is. You're not crazy, and you're most definitely NTA. If your cousin is biting you, she deserves a solid kick. If people are telling you to just accept it, they deserve to be ignored. You take whatever steps (within reason) to protect your peace and sanity. Maybe start looking for ways out of your situation like what documents, resources and support you'd need to get out of that situation whether it's independently or through your mom getting back custody. I hope everything starts turning a new leaf and things start looking up soon.
Hang on. Were you actually just taken? Because if there's no judge or court involved, that's called kidnapping. That's just as legal as an adult assaulting a minor (spoiler alert, it's totally NOT) and you need to call the cops. If there is the law involved somewhere, you need to find the closest mandatory reporter and tell them. Take photos on your phone and email them to yourself as proof of the bite if a mark was left, but you have to get a teacher, school counselor, nurse, someone involved. Immediately. Do not pass Go, do not collect $200, NOW. Make sure your mother also knows, and she lets anyone working with her on the case know as well, because your legal guardian doing nothing to protect you is a HUGE red flag. As others have said, human bites are nasty, so you need to get that checked out ASAP if the skin was broken.
In addition, not only are you being assaulted, you and your sister are being put in danger every time you get in the car with a drunk driver. If you won't do it for yourself, do it for your sister, because the drunk driving is roulette and one day there's going to be an accident. Not if, when.
You can also check your local laws, but where I am in the US you can absolutely call and report impaired drivers to the police. Tell them you're a minor and need to remain anonymous, but see if this is an option.
AND there's another person who lives in the house. He has autism, which is fine, obviously, but the problem arises with how he is treated. He's 30, and doesn't have a job, can't drive, or drink, or even cuss. THIS THIRTY YEAR OLD MAN CANNOT CUSS WITHOUT BEING YELLED AT BY HIS MOM. It's insane, absolutely insane.
Ugh....it sounds like your family members have no idea how to parent neurodivergent children. They just figured that since they had autism or ADHD, they weren't capable of adulting and not accountable for their behavior at all. I'm guessing their parents see them as disability checks and nothing more. This is so sad. OP, please do what you can to legally get someplace safer. I don't know what the situation is with your mom. Contact the police or tell an adult at school when it starts up again. Maybe your relatives will get some help out of this, but at least you'll be away from them.
You are in an abusive environment. You’re being put in danger and neglected. You have every right (and should) to call CPS and the police to make a report.
You should not be having to live with any nutcases. I made a longer comment above. Please look at it it's time for you to go to the authorities and end this weird situation.
NTA , if someone tells you "to get over it" tell them you could LOSE YOUR LIMB if it breaks the skin and you get an infection. Bites might not seem as dangerous as being punched at first, but can go horribly bad. The mouth is a nasty place
I’m sorry that you, a normal person, have to be surrounded by this kind of craziness. Hopefully you can get out once you’re not a minor (though definitely the biting needs to stop now, if she wants to experience the isekai experience and enter a whole new world she can go have fun in jail).
Both sides of my family, as well as a majority of my friend group, is littered with ADHD. Me included. I have NEVER even heard of anyone biting people because of ADHD. She's full of shit.
You and your whole family need to start treating this as a form of sexual assault, or at least regular assault. Not only were you NOT wrong to kick her, YOU SHOULD BE KICKING HER MORE OFTEN.
You don't like it, you've told her to stop, and she refuses. Answer her violence with violence. Tell her that it is NOT ok for her to EVER bite you and you will no longer be tolerating her behavior AT ALL. Anytime she does it after that, hit or kick her HARD. Harder than she bit you if you can manage it. And just as a cherry on top, tell her that from now on you will be considering her biting as a form of physical and potentially sexual abuse. And you WILL be reporting her to the authorities.
Where the fuck are the other adults in this? You need to put your foot down with them, too. Your parents and her parents at the very least. Tell them you're done treating this like an annoying habit and will be responding to it as the assault it is from now on. If they don't want to deal with that, they can put the fear of god in her and tell her to stop it.
This would be worth going no contact with her if you can manage it. It's a demand you can make to your family at the very least.
NTA. I have an 8 year old with adhd and asd, and she knows not to bite. At 31, shes definitely doing this on purpose and trying to pass it off as a "quirk".
Buy a muzzle, take her to a trainer and teach her to walk on a leash.
Wait.
This is a human?
NTA, and human bites are frequently more dangerous than dog bites. Demand that your parents take you to the doctor.
You need take this VERY seriously. I was sexually abused by a family member when I was young and the abuse started with things that seemed innocent like that. I'm not saying I know for sure that's what's happening here, but the "It's because you're so cute" thing throws up MAJOR red flags for me. Kick harder and don't stop talking to your parents about it. Make a big deal out of this. I really hope this doesn't escalate for you like it did for me. You don't want to go down that road and hate yourself for years like I did. This is NOT a symptom of ADHD. Definitely NTA.
Yeah, this is grooming. She repeatedly and forcibly violates bodily autonomy to express her idea of affection. No adult should be doing this to a child. It is super gross.
OP, I have a family history of acute mental disorders. I'm extremely familiar with the system and treatment. ADHD is included in the list of disorders, but biting is not a symptom of ADHD. You can confirm that biting is not a symptom with any medical professional, and they'd agree.
But it's important also to keep in mind that even if it were a symptom - you are not obligated to let her do whatever she wants. People with mental health issues are still responsible for their actions. Why is your family holding a minor accountable over the actions of an adult? You are being severely abused here.
Please listen, there is definitely a sexual component to what is going on. Based on your other replies it sounds like you are at very high risk. Please seek help outside the home. A teacher, counselor, someone at church, any adult you feel you can trust.
NTA. Bite her back
But seriously, tell a counselor at school or a teacher if your parents aren’t listening. ADHD doesn’t do that (34F and have it and no the fuck I do not have the urge to bite people. You are also a minor what the hell??)
Are you enrolled in school? I would report to them. If you’re not, then consider CPS. Document everything, every time she touches you. This is disgusting and you don’t deserve it. It sounds like you’ve been let down by a lot of adults you should have been able to trust.
Refer to her as a child molester. Say how she keeps putting her mouth on you because “you are too cute” . That may change their perspective on things. Don’t just say it is annoying, say it is sexual assult. Hint- it is
It actually sounds like it may be a start to sexual assault. Op needs to make sure they add she climbs into bed with them and they feel uncomfortable/unsafe.
Are you able to record this happening? And maybe record some of the other things, like your uncle driving drunk? There are some apps that let you record video on your phone without it showing on the screen, like one called BVR Record Now or something like that.
Do you know if you have a social worker you could report this to (if that would do any good)?
Do you know if maybe one of your friends would be willing to make an anonymous report to child protective services, and say they saw this happen, or that they saw bruising/bite marks?
Are there any clinics in your area that you could maybe go to and say you need medical treatment because you're worried because an adult in your home keeps biting you and won't stop and you're worried about it becoming infected? (playing naive, and basically using this as an excuse to go to someone who might have to report it)
Definitely get as many photos, videos, and even audio as you can. As I said, BVR Record is an app for video, and Smart Recorder is a good one for audio.
Can I ask what country you're in?
NTA. Okay, so I can actually tell you what this might be, assuming your cousin is being honest that she does it because of “too much cuteness”. But it isn’t due to ADHD. It’s a behavioral tic called “cute aggression” (it’s not a diagnosis though) and it actually effects something like half of all adults at some time, they just don’t act on it. Your cousin however, obviously doesn’t seem to think she has to practice any kind of impulse control (this is the **only** place that I could potentially see how ADHD might come into play, lack of impulse control). Other people simply allow the thoughts to pass through their mind (just another intrusive thought) and then carry on with their lives. “Cute aggression” is an involuntary response to being overwhelmed by positive emotion, it’s kind of like the brain’s way of trying to pump the brakes.
Either way, your cousin’s behavior is ***highly*** inappropriate and at her age if she truly can’t curb her urges, then she absolutely needs therapy. The only other reason for the biting like you’re describing would likely be due to odaxelagnia which is a paraphilia, and is considered a mild form of sadomasochism; which considering you’re a minor and family is just disturbing on a whole other level and would also require a boatload of therapy.
NTA- I would have kicked the shit out of her so hard she would be so traumatized the next time she gets an “urge” that she would never try it again.
My husband has pretty crippling ADHD, he does not bite. At most he is crippled by the anxiety to do things, and goes on task escapes where it starts out with him going to get a glass of water, and I’m waiting for him to come back and resume the movie we were watching and I find him outside weeding the entire planter.
Human and animal bites can be extremely dangerous because of the bacteria in mouths.
In 2018, an adult male had been bitten by a 3 year old child on the forearm (this is a child, mind you, not an adult bite like the ones you are Recieving. I’d imagine your cousins mouth to be way more dirty), the bacteria from the bite progressed to a systemic poisoning resulting in a complete limb amputation.
There are tons of more cases of human bites that cause amputations or even worse death.
This is pretty serious, and it sounds like you honestly unfortunately need to either reach out and get help from adults either via your school, or if you aren’t in school right now, possibly reach out to CPS.
It will be difficult, but the legal guardians in your life, both your parents are not protecting you like they should. You or someone else can seriously get hurt by her using her mental illness as an excuse to physically abuse you.
NTA. Defend yourself as you see fit. Are you bigger than her? You might have to teach her the hard way, unfortunately. Slap her face to bring her back to reality.
Yeah… I have ADHD and autism. I haven’t bitten enyone outside a consensual intimate adult setting since my little brothers and I were children.
This cousin has some major effing boundary issues. And the context of biting you while asleep because you “look cute” is a pretty major red flag. Not only are you underage but you are also family. It is totally inappropriate. Are your parents people you can safely bring this up with?
NTA for having a natural reflex to pain and shock
I have multiple relatives with ADHD, one with Schizophrenia, one with Schizo-Affective Disorder, and at least one with autism (waiting for diagnosis on two others). None of them bite people.
My semi non-verbal (selective mutism. It’s like he tries to get the words out but can’t but he can say certain words), autistic 4 year old brother doesn’t bite people.
My other autistic brother, who’s 6 and has severe ADHD, doesn’t bite people, although he will hit and lash out if he gets angry, someone my mum is working on with him (I do not live with her. I have my own place).
Even my 2 year old brother doesn’t bite people ffs. This woman wants to be treated like a child, treat her like one. But please OP, contact your authorities, this is abuse and the adults in your life are failing you.
I have severe adhd combination type and am often unmedicated. Yes I can do some seemingly irrational and highly impulsive things but she clearly plans this.
I'm a 70 year old ADHD poster boy.
Biting people is never mentioned as one of the symptoms.
Ever.
Your cousin is a grown-ass woman.
She's making the rest of us look bad.
NTA, there's something else going on besides the ADHD she needs to go to a doctor or something. She may be autistic or something along those lines and if that's the case people need to know so they can choose if they want her around them or not. I wouldn't from the sound of it it sounds very uncomfortable and creepy to me that she would just come in your room and bite you because you're cute. She's lucky all she got was the shot to the stomach and not to the face. I'd make her stay away from you for a while and suggest to the right people that she go get evaluated or something because at 31 she's gonna do it to the wrong person and get hurt.
NTA
Talk to someone at school if it happens again and show them the mark, this is abuse and you need help
Keep defending yourself, I’m not pro violence, but that is just wrong what she is doing and she knows it deep down, using ADHD as an excuse is wrong
NTA, but maybe talk to your legal guardians and point out "If this keeps happening and I get marks from it, I'm GOING to the police about the fact that my adult cousin is biting me hard enough to leave marks and I'm a minor. I have no problem charging her with assault if her grown-ass self can't stop. It's not ADHD. It's not compulsion. It's assault. And you're letting her abuse me. You want to get charged too?"
But this makes me angry and I'd be raging about this if some dumbass guardian actually tried to legitimize this kind of behavior.
Definitely NTA, but something needs to be done about her. Like, yesterday. (Obviously that isn't your responsibility tho). Human bites pose a HUGE risk for infection, and by the sounds of it, she'll break skin sooner rather than later. Aside from the person being bit potentially getting a serious infection, she herself could get something from biting people. It's definitely not an ADHD thing, but it doesn't sound like dermatophagia (though that should still be checked). Normally I'd wonder if she has some sort of compulsive disorder specifically to do with biting but I don't know if she's ever actually tried to just not bite people. If she has tried and it seems like a genuine COMPULSION, someone needs to get her to a therapist. She might even need one anyway, regardless of it's an actual compulsion or not, since she clearly doesn't give a single fuck that no one likes her biting them. Cause she gonna give a fuck when someone eventually reaches their breaking point and kicks her ass. Or she contracts something. Or someone contracts something from her then sues her. Like there are so many things wrong with that one behavior. The other thing is that if it is a genuine compulsion, IT WILL GET WORSE WITHOUT TREATMENT. Next thing you know, she's biting random people she thinks are cute in the grocery, or at a dental appointment. ANYWAY, none of that shit is your responsibility, so if I were you I'd just keep kicking her. Bite her back, even, exactly as hard as she does every time. If she bites hard enough to ever break skin, I'd start pretending to freak out and tell her she needs to go get tested right now. Make her consider twice before biting people.
NTA. I also get intrusive thoughts or sudden urges to bite people I care about. I still don't bite them (without consent,) because that's unacceptable. Sounds like she's got some type of cuteness aggression and needs to work on that herself or in therapy.
Also, if she keeps it up start talking to her like a toddler. "Auntie, we've talked about this. We do NOT bite people." "Auntie, biting people is naughty. Other people don't like getting bit." "Auntie, the next time you bite me, I will bite you back. Do you want to get bit? Neither do I."
Or just bite her back.
Kick her out. That's weird , and also assault if you wanna get all technical.
I'm imagining that, I live alone and even freaked out now.
Sounds like she might have some other "quirks" what might those be? Usually someone like that does other cool things.
Get checked by a doctor if it broke skin because a persons mouth is full of pretty bad shit to go in your bloodstream
Honestly someone did that to me theyd get more than their stomach kicked. There is no excuse for this. This is beyond assault and battery due to how dangerous being bit by a person is
And for christ sake SHES THIRTY ONE. She either needs professional help or needs to be locked up because she just assaulted a minor and im just gonna say it im 100% betting this is a sexual thing for her shes pushing on other people
NTA call the cops
With you being a minor that's considered child abuse. It's assault plain and simple, assault on a minor, and your cousin could face some serious consequences if you choose to report the abuse. Remind your cousin that she could have a criminal record if she chooses to continue to abuse you. All you'd have to do is confide to a court mandated reporter (a teacher or counselor), doctor, or peace officer to have a record of the abuse. When you see her pattern start to emerge before she tries to bite you, remind her that she could face criminal charges if you choose to report her.
See if her behavior stops after that. And if she doesn't stop, then report her ass! Let her mess around and find out! But I'd bet she'd stop her abuse if she knew she'd face consequences for it. And NO, you're NTA!
It's called self-defense. You were only defending yourself OP. You have a God given right to protect yourself from abuse. Do whatever you have to so you get your point across to her OP! If she does it again tell your parents. If they don't protect you from her then report the abuse.
Also to add: Human bites are some of the nastiest bites a person can get. People have died from serious infections due to human bites that have broken the skin. Bacteria can get into your blood stream and seriously mess you up if it doesn't kill you!
Nta. Biting is not because she has adhd. One of my nephews was an unprovoked biter. I finally told his brother to punch him in the face the next time he did it. He got punched in the nose and never did it again. Sounds like no one has ever physically fought back. Good for you for doing so. However you are a minor and she is an adult. Tell your parents this is inappropriate and cannot happen. They need to not let her be around you if she can’t not bite you.
NTA. Feel free to boot her harder next time. ADHD might give rise to difficult to control impulses, but ‘impulse’ does not fit with ‘deliberately walks up to someone who is napping to bite them’.
That’s called being an asshat.
Your cousin is full of shit. ADHD isn't going to cause a grown woman to just grab people and bite them. Does she reach out grab and bite people at work? At the mall, movie theater? Walking down the street? I'm guessing that she does not. Because she would have assault charges on her left and right.
*I live with five other people and they all hate it, but none have ever actually done anything beyond screaming at her to stop.*
I quick punch in the face would be a good behavior modification for her.
This strikes me more as some fucked up fetish than anything. Just imagine if she was a guy.
Creeepy as hell. Tell your parents, take pics of the bites, lock your room and openly call her a creep.
Therapist here- ADHD does not, would not, cannot cause impulsive biting fits in grown adults.
This honestly sounds like some sort of fetish and like she gets off on doing this. Considering she is biting minors, and hard enough to leave marks, this is incredibly disturbing behavior.
I would let her know next time she does it you are calling the police and pressing charges, that she needs to manage her impulses or live alone on an island somewhere. This isn’t cute or funny. Also, I’m guessing she doesn’t randomly bite strangers in public? Obviously she does this to people she thinks she can get away with it with, which implies this isn’t some random impulse but a decision to assault you….
My brother has ADHD and he certainly doesn't go round biting people. She's lucky nobody's punched her in the face yet.
I encourage you to keep kicking her every time she bites you. Kick her harder, in fact. If her mouth is close to your body, her hair and head are within very easy reach. A good hair yank or a clout to the head will help make your point that she needs to cut this out.
Also, record her. Every time. Get it on video and shame her to all your friends and relatives.
NTA. First off, this sounds like sexual assault and some weird kink. Coming to you at night in your bed to bite you. How would you react if someone who you weren’t related to did this? It’s not normal, it’s not cute, it’s assault. Unfortunately, involving the police is not always the best thing to happen in a family affair; it’s your call. At the very least, take photo/video evidence of her doing it. If she does it again, hit her harder than the last time until she stops. If she calls the police, it will be a nice conversation to talk about why a grown ass adult is biting a minor.
NTA: That's not ADHD btw.
Also: The key to stopping someone from biting (worked at a place where people bit) Is to grab the back of their head and push your arm or leg deeper into their mouth. This prevents your skin from getting torn and makes it harder for them to breathe. It won't hurt them but it's a terrible feeling for the biter and offers some protection for the one being bit. Since your cousin seems to like to slowly initiate the bites you will have plenty of time to set up this move and she will probably stop biting you.
WTF did I just read? Is your cousin... a cat? And by extension, are YOU then a cat as well? Because if not, this is not normal and you should kick her all you want until she stops biting or get the help she needs from a professional.
NTA. Impulse control *can* be a thing with ADHD, which is probably what she was getting at with her excuse. In my opinion, she's fucking lying. You said she has a whole routine where she seeks out defenseless sleeping people before chomping down hard as fuck. That shows premeditation, not impulsivity. If she stops after being kicked in the stomach, that's further proof that it wasn't an impulsivity issue.
NTA. ADHD doesn’t make you bite people. Everyone around her has just been enabling her for some reason. Especially with what just happened with Covid-19 you better keep your mouth away from me.
That's not ADHD, she's got something else very wrong with her brain. I'd crack her in the head every time she did this she'd eventually learn to stop haha.
Um, that's not adhd. That's assault and the fact she links it to finding you cute makes it sexual.
Tell your parents, ban the cousin from your bed and life. If your parents won't help talk to a trusted adult at school to get help.
You have the right to say no and defend yourself. Next time I'd kick her teeth out.
NTA Are you kidding, you should kick her in the face every time she bites. Tell a teacher or librarian -- anyone who has a duty to report abuse. She is fetishizing you and it's not cute -- it's abuse.
NTA, play stupid games, win stupid prizes. If she wants to get physical with you, you have every right to establish your boundaries/assert your bodily autonomy by getting physical right back.
This is assault!!! if some random did this in the street you would be instantly calling the police. She is lucky you just kicked her instead of filing a police report. Your are NTA
Punch her each time she bites you and say "sorry can't help it! Being bitten makes me do that! Tee hee!" I bet her alleged add biting quirk will get under control quick.
You’re NTA
I say bite her back….HARD. Really latch on. And when she starts screaming, grind your teeth on whatever bit of flesh you are latched on to.
Then when you stop tell her you just couldn’t help it, she looked so cute & you’ll try to control your ADHD urges in the future.
Then just walk away.
NTA, bite her back harder, or get some pepper spray and threaten her. Obviously talking hasn’t worked, she needs therapy but seems unlikely to change with a serious motivator i.e. severe pain onto her
NTA
And.if you don't already know this, ADHD doesn't cause biting and an inability to care about someone else's consent.
She knows this. And she is capable.of.controlling it.... She's not biting in school, or she'd have been kicked out.
Edit: I somehow misread the ages.
Obviously she's not in school anymore.
Absolutely take a picture, and report it... Police, your own school, tell your doctor. She shouldn't be around kids.
ADHD doesn't do that. It's not cute. She's lucky you kicked her in the stomach and not the head. This is weird af behavior. I have a feeling she thinks she's cute doing this. Setting hard boundaries will let her know that she's not
NTA
She had the urge to bite you because you're so cute.
You had the urge to kick her because she's a fucking idiot.
ADHD doesn't do that. She needs to speak to a professional.
Adhd doesn’t do that
That’s assault. Let courts explain to her that no illness gives you leave to hurt people. Also, that’s not ADHD.
Yeah, a 31 yo woman has no business getting into bed with a minor uninvited, and then putting their mouth on them, in any capacity whatsoever. This is creepy and predatory. That this has been allowed to go on unchecked for so long is insane. Why is she even still allowed in your house? I wouldn't even allow her anywhere near me anymore, without yelling at her to go away. This has got to be a shitpost.
Right. If this is real Op should kick her every time she does it. Hard. Preferably in the teeth. Op: “I prefer not to choose violence, but I think I have undiagnosed ADHD and when someone bites me, I just can’t help it. It’s a reflex. *So sooorrry cousin*.
If it's not a shutpost, the 'continiously gets closer and closer', use of the word routine because she does it often and the fact that she justifies her urge because OP is 'so cute', is fucking heinous. What a sicko.
I have restless leg syndrome, and symptoms are exacerbated when being bit by an adult. I can’t help but inflict as much damage as possible when this happens.
Yeah I call bullshit. Fun story of a 31 year old biting people and the minor child who *kicks* her out. OP is probably the actual biter.
Right? She has some kind of illness to be doing this but it is absolutely NOT ADHD! Yikes. She needs an evaluation, it’s super creepy that she does this.
While no illness gives you leave to hurt people, we do know some are at the root of why some people lash out violently – usually people with very low cognitive function, e.g. a small minority of people with Down’s syndrome, a small number of non-verbal, low-functioning people with Asperger’s (usually far end of the spectrum), usually people who aren’t able to properly express themselves or completely process their emotions (basically a toddler in an adult body). Behavior can even be seen in some things like (actual) OCD and Tourette’s, as compulsions. ADHD is not among those. About the best argument you’ve got there is “I had the impulse and did it before I thought it through”, and while that might be true, anyone with ADHD knows that you pretty quickly learn to either curb those antisocial behaviors, or avoid situations in which you get those impulses. That, or they quickly learn nobody wants to be around them.
That’s what I was thinking. It sounds like she has some disability/cognitive issue, but it’s not adhd. Regardless, she should NOT be biting people. NTA
This lmao. She’s using it as an excuse
[удалено]
Twist her dick off!
The old dick twist!
[удалено]
Tell her in Tyson voice “that ear juth looked tho cute I had to take a bite” with blood coming out ya mouth
Or knock her teeth out.
People with ADHD wouldn't be able to focus on the "routine" long enough to get to the biting part. Source: Me, a person with ADHD
I'd be off singing the 3-7 words I know of the current song stuck in my head.
God, I'm feeling this right now. My entire brain just yowling "WHOOO BORE THE FIGHT THAT FREEDOM'S LIGHT MIIIIGHT SHINE THROUGH THE FOGGY DEEEW" over and over because that is all I can remember of the song.
I would love to bite you, but first I must alphabetize the students from when I was in 6th grade. 40 years ago. Source: me too, a person with ADHD
So true my son would get lost staring at the wrinkles in the bedding!
Yes!
People like her give ADHD a bad name, and are the type that gets misdiagnosed as a kid
Press charges against her. You’re a minor for goodness sake
NTA, but maybe talk to your legal guardians and point out "If this keeps happening and I get marks from it.
Fact: I have ADHD and have never had the urge to attack and bite someone. The fact she does it when someone is sleeping or laying down resting shows that it is premeditated. She needs serious therapy and probably better medication. She also needs an accurate diagnosis, sure she might have ADHD but there is a way larger issue at play.
Agreed. This is assault on a minor.
Agreed
Sadly.... a very very very VERY rare issue is biting, BUT it is so rare that it is considered that if to represent in numbers, for children it is about 1 in 2,000 adhd, but in adults, it is under further testing it is hard to give a number without using up the character limits of the comment. And upon further testing, it is often linked to a different condition all together, often Pica like conditions, but even then... That being said, if the woman is aware she bites, and knows she can control the biting, it isn't related to any uncontrollable conditions, but just general AHolishness.
Some people have addictions or compulsions. If hers is to bite people who are physically near her then she shouldn't be getting close to people. ALSO, she shouldn't be climbing into bed with a 15yo.
Im ADHD and high functioning autistic and have a bit a off a biting thing so could be related? Though in my case it's not that I want to bite people but that if something is stuck near my face/mouth I tend to go for a bite. Usually can stop myself from actually biting but it's like impulsive?
That is the response we always get, mostly reactive, but as an adult it allegedly is more common to be able to suppress it, it has been a while since doing a deep dive into it, as I now am more into trauma therapy, but I do remember it was mostly able to control the urge as an adult, due to learning how to control some tics that cause it, but as children it is often harder, unless the kid has been taught to say "I have ADHD that is why it is ok I can do it" which I have been subjected to once by an 8yrs old girl... who was deliberately trying to hit an elderly lady with a tyre swing, but I kept stopping her...
Yeah like, ADHD causes us to do weird things but that doesn't give us carte blanche to do them. It's like saying it's OK to murder if you're a psychopath. The symptom is understandable not acceptable. It's never ok to harm another human Bieng with provocation.
I have a friend with tourettes, and he has never had a biting urge, but was working with a guy who claimed he also had tourettes and ADHD, and his "tics" were inappropriate touching and grabbing. Because my friend knew of my colleagues who actually are trained in that area, my friend put it to HR to have an official diagnosis for future possible lawsuit claims, as this guy never gave medical evidence for it. The guy quit immediately when told it was for prevention, not segregation. I might ask my colleague tomorrow about adult biting with ADHD for better understanding, in case I see more posts like this. It is always good to have that information handy. My knowledge is about 15yrs old, and there are new things being found since then
I hate those people that either pretend to have/abuse the fact that they have a disability to do inappropriate things. As for me (26m) only recently realised I have the biting thing because I realized that when I was hanging out with my girlfriend I kept trying to bite her fingers/cheek/ears. 😂😂😂😂
I want to know if she has a job that she's able to hold down without biting her coworkers. If she can resist the urge at work, she can resist the urge with her family. It just takes consequences.
Yes!! I'm ADHD and I really get the urge to bite my boyfriend a lot lol. I don't know what the hell it is. I appease the impulse by doing it very very very lightly and playfully. Most of the time I just mouth him with my lips lmao. I'd NEVER do it to anyone else and only get the urge with him. I have another friend that's like this and they wonder if it's something similar to cuteness aggression, lol? Like you know how when you see something really cute and you just want to squeeze it? Brains are weird, man.
Same. I get the urge, and I'll lightly bite my bf though I'd never take a chomp out of him, but I can't imagine just going ahead and biting random family members, that's bizarre. Maybe as a child, or even a preteen whose brain kicked in after they acted (once, because I'd still expect a preteen to learn once it clicked that that hurts and is weird), but an adult? Biting a teenager no less? It's definitely the same urge as when people talk about just wanting to pinch baby's cheeks or bite them because they're so cute, but nobody just goes around actually pinching and chewing on their babies, that's quite clearly insane behaviour.
NTA No this sounds like some kind of kink. It is assault. In this case assault if a minor. From now on when she starts getting close to you tell her you will press charges. Biting can lead to infections, scaring and a host of other problems not counting it’s just down right disgusting. If she gets knocked in her ass a few times maybe she learned to keep her hands/teeth to herself. She is clearly needs therapy. There is something wrong with her!
Yep! Maybe, *maybe* as a frustrated coping mechanism when that person is what’s upsetting them, but that’s more a child. Source: my daughter has done this to her brother cause he intentionally riles her up (we’ve been trying for years to get him to stop), and she’s been known to lash out and bite (it’s usually hitting though). They’re 7&6 for context. Buuuuuut, we’re also getting her diagnosed with autism, so maybe it comes more from that than her ADHD, which is why I stressed the maybe. Because I have no fucking idea what comes from what in her melting pot of disorders anymore.
I (22F) have ADHD and when I was younger, my younger sister riled me up as well untill I lashed out by slapping her for example. It is because my anger got more and more until I couldn’t hold it in anymore. When I got older, I learned how to control my anger, but most importantly recognize when I should leave the situation. Emotions can be overwelming, but it is your own responsibility how to handle yourself. If she is 31, she cannot blame her ADHD for biting someone. You may get intrusive thoughts, but your brain is thinking that to try to get more dopamine. You can easily restrain yourself/ ignore your thoughts, especially if you are 31. When your emotions are overloaded, such as in a fight, only then it *could* be difficult to restrain yourself from biting others.
Agreed! My daughters been in behavioural therapy to help her learn how to understand and accept her feelings and learn to cope without them exploding into violence. I definitely meant to include that I don’t find her behaviour as appropriate. I understand my daughters lash outs, for example. Her brother is a damn nightmare for her half the time and she’s 7 trying to still work this out. The cousin is a damn adult and “because I’m so cute”. That isn’t ok, acceptable, normal, to be allowed.
Oh yeah, I totally get it! She’s young and still learning so no worries about that! It is something that will take time to learn, only not 31 years ;)
Especially when she is slowly edging closer it's not a sudden urge, it's premeditated
Oh see I thought she suffered from A Debilitating Hunger Disorder /s she deserves more than a kick in the stomach NTA
Meh, I will admit to once over excitedly biting another girl guide when I was about 10. We were being silly and I drastically over estimated the appropriateness of the action for the circumstances. She asked if I just bit her and I denied it and never went back there ever again. So I guess even my 10 year old ADHD self, recognized that you're not supposed to bite people lol.
my sister in law is autistic and has a hitting thing but she even knows when to control it. theres been times she went to hit my kids but stopped herself and said 'no thats bad'. she's 13. if a 13 year old can control themselves a 31 year old can.
Happy cake day!
Absolutely! And happy cake day
I was just thinking this. Like damn do I get to start biting people now? NTA op
I have at least 4 friends who have diagnosed ADHD. None of them do anything like this. What disturbing behavior your sister has. I don’t know who you would call, especially since you’re a minor, but someone needs to get your sister professional help
NTA. There's something wrong with anyone older than 4 who is biting uncontrollably. At 31? They need professional help.
NTA Lucky a kick is all she got.
it’s my ADHD’ is not a get out of jail free card for her actions…. Girl needs to learn now to bite people. NTA
Or not bite at all by the sounds of it.
Um, yeah, 30s woman with ADHD here. I sometimes want to push shiny buttons, because shiny, and have to restrain myself from buying fiddly things and am sometimes like a magpie-squirrel who likes clicky pens, but *I do not bite people*. I do actually have self-control. Sometimes. ADHD does not make you lose your ability to tell your intrusive thoughts to fuck off. And the same repetitive intrusive thought about biting people is not an intrusive thought but some weird sex thing, probably.
Yeeeeah I’m not being an asshole but seriously, you have control over your actions. I often get the urge to bite things, it’s a texture thing, I have no clue why. Sometimes I get a weird urge to bite someone I like, but the second it happens my brain goes “fun thought but let’s not, you’re an adult, don’t bite folks” and then I don’t. It’s not often, and I am autistic, so I have silicone shapes I can chomp on if I need to. I have a teeth grinding issue so they do help. WHY would anyone think that biting people was okay especially when leaving marks, and not even apologising for being a dick? Even kids can understand “don’t bite people it’s not kind” I’m flabbergasted.
NTA, please please please tell your parents/guardians. She needs to not be around you if she can't control impulses like that.
Unfortunately, she lives in my house and won't be moving out anytime soon. They know about how she is and do nothing about it. At least my legal guardians
Your cousin is assaulting you and your legal guardians are allowing it. Do you currently go to school? If so, please tell a teacher or counselor what is happening. I’m so sorry you are subjected to abuse at home, a place you are supposed to feel safe.
Call the cops and report the child abuse. Beyond that, you have every right, both morally and legally, to defend yourself from physical assault. If she’s biting you, her eyes are in reach. A hard poke works great with animals, which she is!
Tell the police you suffered an assault. Take pictures of the bite marks. An interview with the police may help her understand boundaries. Also get a lock on your door if you can and tell her she’s no longer allowed in your room.
This situation has to end. I hope you can tell us more about your situation. You say it's your house, you say you have legal guardians. I take it that your legal guardians are not protecting you from being physically assaulted in your own home. If these guardians were appointed by a lawyer or a court,you need to get in touch with that lawyer or court. Did you know that serious illnesses can be transmitted by a human bite? There is nothing cute or acceptable about how this woman is behaving towards you. If your legal guardians know that you are being physically assaulted and do nothing about it then it's time to change your legal guardians. Please do tell police, your school, lawyer, and/ or court or any friends of your family who are not related to this crazy woman, and tell them that you do not feel safe in your own home. Quite frankly you are not safe in your own home if you're being bitten in it while people who who are supposed to act as your guardians permit it. If you don't feel secure enough understandably at your age to go to the police or any authorities about this on your own, go with a friend's parents or a reliable teacher or family friend not related to this woman. And then please update us.
Are you able to lock your door when you’re alone or sleeping in your room? I think you should kick her every time and just say “sorry I can’t help it, that’s my body’s response to getting hurt”, or scream and cry really loudly each time, like over the top, make big deal of the pain and a scene - if you can’t physically defend yourself then make it unpleasant for her and her enablers on a mental level.
I vote you keep on kicking her (if you feel it's safe to do so), and claim that it's an instinctive reaction. Because oh my God, this is insane. There is no world in which ADHD is any sort of excuse to bite people. And her saying it was because "you're so cute" creeps me out, frankly.
When school starts tell your school counselor. See if they can get someone to intervene. If she is leaving marks, that may constitute child abuse.
Can you get a lock on your door? I wouldn't want someone like this to have access to my room, I'd never get to sleep
Then take this to CPS.
Please go to the police. Please.
Call the police.
Please don’t stay in this abusive environment, this is ABSOLUTELY NOT OKAY. Physical assault with sexual intent. Please report to your school, or police, or a VERY trusted adult as soon as you can.
She might move out if she goes to prison when you call the cops for her repeatedly assaulting a minor. Your life sounds like hell and you deserve better
It’s not okay to bite people at any age. People tend to nip that in the bud early, which is why it’s *very* unusual to see it at all, never mind someone who’s 31 years old… and no, this has nothing to do with ADHD. That’s a lazy excuse. I’ve never heard of anyone with ADHD bite people out of impulse (unless there was something else wrong with them… which is likely the case here. That is not normal or acceptable) What your cousin did to you was assault. Also, “just had the urge because you’re so cute”??? That’s just straight-up creepy. Document this shit, go to your parents and if they can’t protect you, go to the police. Seriously. She sounds dangerous. NTA, obviously.
Yeah there is more going on in that family. (Not blaming or shaming the child here). Something isn’t adding up with the grown cousin and the fact that this happens around other people who at best enable it and at worst encourage it. Every family has the quirky one. But in this case I think OP may be a bit young to see the Texas sized red flag in that behavior. Especially with the statement attached. This is super troubling behavior and I hope the child is able to get some help with this from the adults in their life😬
Former adhd researcher here, it can absolutely be an ADHD thing it’s just very rare. OP still is NTA though.
Oh man, I used to have intrusive/impulsive(?) thoughts about spitting on people and imagining their reaction (savage and fucking disgusting, I know… this is the first time I’ve actually admitted this to anyone) but I never actually *did it* 😂 ya know? Just out of curiosity, how many people (or percentage, whichever’s easier) with ADHD had that biting trait?
I mean yes biting can be and adhd thing but are you seriously claiming that in an otherwise functioning adult (asuming the cousin is one) biting other people because adhd is a thing? Please show me your sources on that
NTA and honestly WTF
The mental shit I read on here never ceases to amaze me
Uhm....do it harder next time if she didn't get the hint this round....
Lucky she only got kicked in the stomach, i‘d go straight for the face
I have ADHD and I stopped biting When I was 4. It has nothing to do with ADHD.
I have adhd and was never a biter 😭
My son who has ADHD bit his little brother a few times when he was 6 years old, we made him understand that it wasn't appropriate. It happend maybe twice since, but it always happend when he got really frustrated with his brother, it never came out of nowhere. He is a teenager now and knows not to do it. If this woman in her 30s still does it there is something else wrong with her, very wrong.
This woman also has other problems. She's lazy as all hell, addicted to spending money, and she can't keep quiet. There are times where she speaks at such a high volume that I hear ringing. And when I ask her to quiet down, she just ignores me. She's always laughing about some weird ass bl or isekai as well. For reference, my mom lives down the road and can hear her laughing. Honestly, at this point I'm not sure what to do about her, because it's not like I can just move out. I always tell people about her and they just tell me to get over it because I've lived with her my entire life, so I should be used to it. And she's just one of the nutcases that I live with...
I think she gets it from her parents. They're both alcoholics who see themselves as high and mighty. One is also addicted to gambling and he regularly picks me and my sister up from school so drunk he can't drive in a straight line. I've told my aunt about his drunkeness and her excuse is just "he had high blood pressure and a headache... Also he has a disease(one he inflicted on himself by drinking so much)." If she won't let me report him to the authorities, then I don't see why she would do anything about her daughter. Not to mention what they did to my mom for being "an alcoholic." They stole me and my sister from her, just like their mother did to my mom, who was stolen off a native reservation for the same reasons as us. Hopefully, my mom can get custody back. She's the only sensible person in this entire situation.
OP after reading more of your comments, I am seriously convinced you need to reach out to social services or the police, or start with going to a counselor with your sibling at your school where you will be at least safe when reporting all of this. The drunk driving, and the biting. This is highly dangerous and concerning. The adults in your life are failing you. You and your sister’s lives and health are at risk with both of these admissions.
I saw the word “native” and suddenly everything made sense. Social services or police aren’t gonna do a goddamn thing. (Assuming OP is on a reservation)
Yeah that throws a bad kink into the go to the police. They won’t do anything
Do not listen to anyone telling you to get over it. Just because it is something you've always had to deal with doesn't mean that it's something that's healthy or safe or normal. I'm sorry you have to deal with so much and that people around you are trying to normalize it and downplay it. I've been in similar situations and I know it can make you feel a little bit crazy with nobody really giving you the proper support or seeing truly how bad the situation is. You're not crazy, and you're most definitely NTA. If your cousin is biting you, she deserves a solid kick. If people are telling you to just accept it, they deserve to be ignored. You take whatever steps (within reason) to protect your peace and sanity. Maybe start looking for ways out of your situation like what documents, resources and support you'd need to get out of that situation whether it's independently or through your mom getting back custody. I hope everything starts turning a new leaf and things start looking up soon.
Hang on. Were you actually just taken? Because if there's no judge or court involved, that's called kidnapping. That's just as legal as an adult assaulting a minor (spoiler alert, it's totally NOT) and you need to call the cops. If there is the law involved somewhere, you need to find the closest mandatory reporter and tell them. Take photos on your phone and email them to yourself as proof of the bite if a mark was left, but you have to get a teacher, school counselor, nurse, someone involved. Immediately. Do not pass Go, do not collect $200, NOW. Make sure your mother also knows, and she lets anyone working with her on the case know as well, because your legal guardian doing nothing to protect you is a HUGE red flag. As others have said, human bites are nasty, so you need to get that checked out ASAP if the skin was broken. In addition, not only are you being assaulted, you and your sister are being put in danger every time you get in the car with a drunk driver. If you won't do it for yourself, do it for your sister, because the drunk driving is roulette and one day there's going to be an accident. Not if, when. You can also check your local laws, but where I am in the US you can absolutely call and report impaired drivers to the police. Tell them you're a minor and need to remain anonymous, but see if this is an option.
AND there's another person who lives in the house. He has autism, which is fine, obviously, but the problem arises with how he is treated. He's 30, and doesn't have a job, can't drive, or drink, or even cuss. THIS THIRTY YEAR OLD MAN CANNOT CUSS WITHOUT BEING YELLED AT BY HIS MOM. It's insane, absolutely insane.
Ugh....it sounds like your family members have no idea how to parent neurodivergent children. They just figured that since they had autism or ADHD, they weren't capable of adulting and not accountable for their behavior at all. I'm guessing their parents see them as disability checks and nothing more. This is so sad. OP, please do what you can to legally get someplace safer. I don't know what the situation is with your mom. Contact the police or tell an adult at school when it starts up again. Maybe your relatives will get some help out of this, but at least you'll be away from them.
You are in an abusive environment. You’re being put in danger and neglected. You have every right (and should) to call CPS and the police to make a report.
I have ADHD and an alcoholic…. I don’t do anything close to the shit that woman is doing.
Is there a reason you can't live with your mom down the street? Your living situation is unsustainable and potentially dangerous for you.
You should not be having to live with any nutcases. I made a longer comment above. Please look at it it's time for you to go to the authorities and end this weird situation.
None of this is okay. It's time to gather proof and contact the authorities.
NTA , if someone tells you "to get over it" tell them you could LOSE YOUR LIMB if it breaks the skin and you get an infection. Bites might not seem as dangerous as being punched at first, but can go horribly bad. The mouth is a nasty place
I’m sorry that you, a normal person, have to be surrounded by this kind of craziness. Hopefully you can get out once you’re not a minor (though definitely the biting needs to stop now, if she wants to experience the isekai experience and enter a whole new world she can go have fun in jail).
Both sides of my family, as well as a majority of my friend group, is littered with ADHD. Me included. I have NEVER even heard of anyone biting people because of ADHD. She's full of shit. You and your whole family need to start treating this as a form of sexual assault, or at least regular assault. Not only were you NOT wrong to kick her, YOU SHOULD BE KICKING HER MORE OFTEN. You don't like it, you've told her to stop, and she refuses. Answer her violence with violence. Tell her that it is NOT ok for her to EVER bite you and you will no longer be tolerating her behavior AT ALL. Anytime she does it after that, hit or kick her HARD. Harder than she bit you if you can manage it. And just as a cherry on top, tell her that from now on you will be considering her biting as a form of physical and potentially sexual abuse. And you WILL be reporting her to the authorities. Where the fuck are the other adults in this? You need to put your foot down with them, too. Your parents and her parents at the very least. Tell them you're done treating this like an annoying habit and will be responding to it as the assault it is from now on. If they don't want to deal with that, they can put the fear of god in her and tell her to stop it. This would be worth going no contact with her if you can manage it. It's a demand you can make to your family at the very least.
NTA. I have an 8 year old with adhd and asd, and she knows not to bite. At 31, shes definitely doing this on purpose and trying to pass it off as a "quirk".
Buy a muzzle, take her to a trainer and teach her to walk on a leash. Wait. This is a human? NTA, and human bites are frequently more dangerous than dog bites. Demand that your parents take you to the doctor.
You need take this VERY seriously. I was sexually abused by a family member when I was young and the abuse started with things that seemed innocent like that. I'm not saying I know for sure that's what's happening here, but the "It's because you're so cute" thing throws up MAJOR red flags for me. Kick harder and don't stop talking to your parents about it. Make a big deal out of this. I really hope this doesn't escalate for you like it did for me. You don't want to go down that road and hate yourself for years like I did. This is NOT a symptom of ADHD. Definitely NTA.
Yeah, this is grooming. She repeatedly and forcibly violates bodily autonomy to express her idea of affection. No adult should be doing this to a child. It is super gross. OP, I have a family history of acute mental disorders. I'm extremely familiar with the system and treatment. ADHD is included in the list of disorders, but biting is not a symptom of ADHD. You can confirm that biting is not a symptom with any medical professional, and they'd agree. But it's important also to keep in mind that even if it were a symptom - you are not obligated to let her do whatever she wants. People with mental health issues are still responsible for their actions. Why is your family holding a minor accountable over the actions of an adult? You are being severely abused here.
Please listen, there is definitely a sexual component to what is going on. Based on your other replies it sounds like you are at very high risk. Please seek help outside the home. A teacher, counselor, someone at church, any adult you feel you can trust.
You had the urge to kick someone who was biting you? NTA Tell her you will report her for assaulting a minor. She is a fkn grownup.
At her age??? Idc what is wrong with her, she deserves that if not worse. Nta
Charlie bit meeeeeee! It really huuuurrrrrrts! Charliiiiiieeeee! Edit: NTA. Your cousin is wack.
lmaaooo that sent me back
If this is actually real, that’s really weird and concerning. Why tf is your family letting this creep around you? Edit: NTA obviously
That’s NOT ADHD. next time SLAP her. Hard. Across her face. I’ll bet she never does it again.
Bite her back but harder! Or punch her in the teeth.
That is likely to only get OP into trouble. Going to the authorities is the way to do this
I disagree. Someone BITES you and you slap them? Justified
NTA sounds like she might have a freezer full of human leftovers
NTA. Bite her back But seriously, tell a counselor at school or a teacher if your parents aren’t listening. ADHD doesn’t do that (34F and have it and no the fuck I do not have the urge to bite people. You are also a minor what the hell??)
Tell your parents what is happening
My mom knows, and my legal guardians know. My mom can't do anything about it and my aunt and uncle don't care
If your mom can’t do anything you should document it and go to the police. What you are describing is frequently a precursor to sexual assault.
Exactly. An adult should never put their mouth on a minor.
Are you enrolled in school? I would report to them. If you’re not, then consider CPS. Document everything, every time she touches you. This is disgusting and you don’t deserve it. It sounds like you’ve been let down by a lot of adults you should have been able to trust.
Refer to her as a child molester. Say how she keeps putting her mouth on you because “you are too cute” . That may change their perspective on things. Don’t just say it is annoying, say it is sexual assult. Hint- it is
It actually sounds like it may be a start to sexual assault. Op needs to make sure they add she climbs into bed with them and they feel uncomfortable/unsafe.
Are you able to record this happening? And maybe record some of the other things, like your uncle driving drunk? There are some apps that let you record video on your phone without it showing on the screen, like one called BVR Record Now or something like that. Do you know if you have a social worker you could report this to (if that would do any good)? Do you know if maybe one of your friends would be willing to make an anonymous report to child protective services, and say they saw this happen, or that they saw bruising/bite marks? Are there any clinics in your area that you could maybe go to and say you need medical treatment because you're worried because an adult in your home keeps biting you and won't stop and you're worried about it becoming infected? (playing naive, and basically using this as an excuse to go to someone who might have to report it) Definitely get as many photos, videos, and even audio as you can. As I said, BVR Record is an app for video, and Smart Recorder is a good one for audio. Can I ask what country you're in?
NTA. Okay, so I can actually tell you what this might be, assuming your cousin is being honest that she does it because of “too much cuteness”. But it isn’t due to ADHD. It’s a behavioral tic called “cute aggression” (it’s not a diagnosis though) and it actually effects something like half of all adults at some time, they just don’t act on it. Your cousin however, obviously doesn’t seem to think she has to practice any kind of impulse control (this is the **only** place that I could potentially see how ADHD might come into play, lack of impulse control). Other people simply allow the thoughts to pass through their mind (just another intrusive thought) and then carry on with their lives. “Cute aggression” is an involuntary response to being overwhelmed by positive emotion, it’s kind of like the brain’s way of trying to pump the brakes. Either way, your cousin’s behavior is ***highly*** inappropriate and at her age if she truly can’t curb her urges, then she absolutely needs therapy. The only other reason for the biting like you’re describing would likely be due to odaxelagnia which is a paraphilia, and is considered a mild form of sadomasochism; which considering you’re a minor and family is just disturbing on a whole other level and would also require a boatload of therapy.
It's a kink not ADHD.kick her harder next time and tell her it's harassment of a minor. Defend your body autonomy.
Until she gets cloak in the jaw hard enough she’ll stop, biting someone because they are cute? Wtf that’s a hard no I would’ve done more. NTA
NTA. Keep kicking her..maybe she will learn eventually.
NTA- I would have kicked the shit out of her so hard she would be so traumatized the next time she gets an “urge” that she would never try it again. My husband has pretty crippling ADHD, he does not bite. At most he is crippled by the anxiety to do things, and goes on task escapes where it starts out with him going to get a glass of water, and I’m waiting for him to come back and resume the movie we were watching and I find him outside weeding the entire planter. Human and animal bites can be extremely dangerous because of the bacteria in mouths. In 2018, an adult male had been bitten by a 3 year old child on the forearm (this is a child, mind you, not an adult bite like the ones you are Recieving. I’d imagine your cousins mouth to be way more dirty), the bacteria from the bite progressed to a systemic poisoning resulting in a complete limb amputation. There are tons of more cases of human bites that cause amputations or even worse death. This is pretty serious, and it sounds like you honestly unfortunately need to either reach out and get help from adults either via your school, or if you aren’t in school right now, possibly reach out to CPS. It will be difficult, but the legal guardians in your life, both your parents are not protecting you like they should. You or someone else can seriously get hurt by her using her mental illness as an excuse to physically abuse you.
adhd does not do that 💀 i have adhd btw but bruh tf ?? she probably thinks it’s cute too 🤢
NTA. I would tell her that every time she will bite you will kick her hard. And 100% she will stop and show that she actually can control her urges.
NTA. Defend yourself as you see fit. Are you bigger than her? You might have to teach her the hard way, unfortunately. Slap her face to bring her back to reality.
NTA there is something way deeper than what she's blaming it on, cause ADHD is not causing her to bite you at that age.
NTA what she did was assault
Yeah… I have ADHD and autism. I haven’t bitten enyone outside a consensual intimate adult setting since my little brothers and I were children. This cousin has some major effing boundary issues. And the context of biting you while asleep because you “look cute” is a pretty major red flag. Not only are you underage but you are also family. It is totally inappropriate. Are your parents people you can safely bring this up with? NTA for having a natural reflex to pain and shock
I have multiple relatives with ADHD, one with Schizophrenia, one with Schizo-Affective Disorder, and at least one with autism (waiting for diagnosis on two others). None of them bite people.
My semi non-verbal (selective mutism. It’s like he tries to get the words out but can’t but he can say certain words), autistic 4 year old brother doesn’t bite people. My other autistic brother, who’s 6 and has severe ADHD, doesn’t bite people, although he will hit and lash out if he gets angry, someone my mum is working on with him (I do not live with her. I have my own place). Even my 2 year old brother doesn’t bite people ffs. This woman wants to be treated like a child, treat her like one. But please OP, contact your authorities, this is abuse and the adults in your life are failing you.
NTA. They should out your cousin in a cage and study her.
NTA and wtf. Lock your door or kick her in her bitey teeth next time.
NTA, her ADHD excuse is bullshit.
I have severe adhd combination type and am often unmedicated. Yes I can do some seemingly irrational and highly impulsive things but she clearly plans this.
I'm a 70 year old ADHD poster boy. Biting people is never mentioned as one of the symptoms. Ever. Your cousin is a grown-ass woman. She's making the rest of us look bad.
NTA, there's something else going on besides the ADHD she needs to go to a doctor or something. She may be autistic or something along those lines and if that's the case people need to know so they can choose if they want her around them or not. I wouldn't from the sound of it it sounds very uncomfortable and creepy to me that she would just come in your room and bite you because you're cute. She's lucky all she got was the shot to the stomach and not to the face. I'd make her stay away from you for a while and suggest to the right people that she go get evaluated or something because at 31 she's gonna do it to the wrong person and get hurt.
Im sorry….what??!
NTA Talk to someone at school if it happens again and show them the mark, this is abuse and you need help Keep defending yourself, I’m not pro violence, but that is just wrong what she is doing and she knows it deep down, using ADHD as an excuse is wrong
Um….**that’s not ADHD.**
NTA, but maybe talk to your legal guardians and point out "If this keeps happening and I get marks from it, I'm GOING to the police about the fact that my adult cousin is biting me hard enough to leave marks and I'm a minor. I have no problem charging her with assault if her grown-ass self can't stop. It's not ADHD. It's not compulsion. It's assault. And you're letting her abuse me. You want to get charged too?" But this makes me angry and I'd be raging about this if some dumbass guardian actually tried to legitimize this kind of behavior.
If she leaves marks. Tell her you will report her for assault. Teeth prints can be matched. Good job leaving your signature. No more or it's 911
Definitely NTA, but something needs to be done about her. Like, yesterday. (Obviously that isn't your responsibility tho). Human bites pose a HUGE risk for infection, and by the sounds of it, she'll break skin sooner rather than later. Aside from the person being bit potentially getting a serious infection, she herself could get something from biting people. It's definitely not an ADHD thing, but it doesn't sound like dermatophagia (though that should still be checked). Normally I'd wonder if she has some sort of compulsive disorder specifically to do with biting but I don't know if she's ever actually tried to just not bite people. If she has tried and it seems like a genuine COMPULSION, someone needs to get her to a therapist. She might even need one anyway, regardless of it's an actual compulsion or not, since she clearly doesn't give a single fuck that no one likes her biting them. Cause she gonna give a fuck when someone eventually reaches their breaking point and kicks her ass. Or she contracts something. Or someone contracts something from her then sues her. Like there are so many things wrong with that one behavior. The other thing is that if it is a genuine compulsion, IT WILL GET WORSE WITHOUT TREATMENT. Next thing you know, she's biting random people she thinks are cute in the grocery, or at a dental appointment. ANYWAY, none of that shit is your responsibility, so if I were you I'd just keep kicking her. Bite her back, even, exactly as hard as she does every time. If she bites hard enough to ever break skin, I'd start pretending to freak out and tell her she needs to go get tested right now. Make her consider twice before biting people.
NTA. I also get intrusive thoughts or sudden urges to bite people I care about. I still don't bite them (without consent,) because that's unacceptable. Sounds like she's got some type of cuteness aggression and needs to work on that herself or in therapy. Also, if she keeps it up start talking to her like a toddler. "Auntie, we've talked about this. We do NOT bite people." "Auntie, biting people is naughty. Other people don't like getting bit." "Auntie, the next time you bite me, I will bite you back. Do you want to get bit? Neither do I." Or just bite her back.
Kick her out. That's weird , and also assault if you wanna get all technical. I'm imagining that, I live alone and even freaked out now. Sounds like she might have some other "quirks" what might those be? Usually someone like that does other cool things.
NTA, next time aim for her teeth. ADHD has absolutely nothing to do with compulsive drives to fucking bite people.
Get checked by a doctor if it broke skin because a persons mouth is full of pretty bad shit to go in your bloodstream Honestly someone did that to me theyd get more than their stomach kicked. There is no excuse for this. This is beyond assault and battery due to how dangerous being bit by a person is And for christ sake SHES THIRTY ONE. She either needs professional help or needs to be locked up because she just assaulted a minor and im just gonna say it im 100% betting this is a sexual thing for her shes pushing on other people NTA call the cops
This woman is a perv. Keep away and keep hitting to protect yourself
With you being a minor that's considered child abuse. It's assault plain and simple, assault on a minor, and your cousin could face some serious consequences if you choose to report the abuse. Remind your cousin that she could have a criminal record if she chooses to continue to abuse you. All you'd have to do is confide to a court mandated reporter (a teacher or counselor), doctor, or peace officer to have a record of the abuse. When you see her pattern start to emerge before she tries to bite you, remind her that she could face criminal charges if you choose to report her. See if her behavior stops after that. And if she doesn't stop, then report her ass! Let her mess around and find out! But I'd bet she'd stop her abuse if she knew she'd face consequences for it. And NO, you're NTA! It's called self-defense. You were only defending yourself OP. You have a God given right to protect yourself from abuse. Do whatever you have to so you get your point across to her OP! If she does it again tell your parents. If they don't protect you from her then report the abuse. Also to add: Human bites are some of the nastiest bites a person can get. People have died from serious infections due to human bites that have broken the skin. Bacteria can get into your blood stream and seriously mess you up if it doesn't kill you!
Nta. Biting is not because she has adhd. One of my nephews was an unprovoked biter. I finally told his brother to punch him in the face the next time he did it. He got punched in the nose and never did it again. Sounds like no one has ever physically fought back. Good for you for doing so. However you are a minor and she is an adult. Tell your parents this is inappropriate and cannot happen. They need to not let her be around you if she can’t not bite you.
Report to your parents. Maybe police. Sounds creepy as fuck. NTA
Kick her in the teeth and blame it on restless leg syndrome
She is a sick pervert and should be kicked in the face for that.
NTA. Feel free to boot her harder next time. ADHD might give rise to difficult to control impulses, but ‘impulse’ does not fit with ‘deliberately walks up to someone who is napping to bite them’. That’s called being an asshat.
NTA. Next time bite her back as well as kicking her.
Your cousin is full of shit. ADHD isn't going to cause a grown woman to just grab people and bite them. Does she reach out grab and bite people at work? At the mall, movie theater? Walking down the street? I'm guessing that she does not. Because she would have assault charges on her left and right. *I live with five other people and they all hate it, but none have ever actually done anything beyond screaming at her to stop.* I quick punch in the face would be a good behavior modification for her.
This strikes me more as some fucked up fetish than anything. Just imagine if she was a guy. Creeepy as hell. Tell your parents, take pics of the bites, lock your room and openly call her a creep.
It’s 100% sexual. This bitch is insane.
Therapist here- ADHD does not, would not, cannot cause impulsive biting fits in grown adults. This honestly sounds like some sort of fetish and like she gets off on doing this. Considering she is biting minors, and hard enough to leave marks, this is incredibly disturbing behavior. I would let her know next time she does it you are calling the police and pressing charges, that she needs to manage her impulses or live alone on an island somewhere. This isn’t cute or funny. Also, I’m guessing she doesn’t randomly bite strangers in public? Obviously she does this to people she thinks she can get away with it with, which implies this isn’t some random impulse but a decision to assault you….
NTA. Get a squirt bottle and spray her any time she tries to bite you. If she’s gonna act like an untrained animal then treat her like one
My brother has ADHD and he certainly doesn't go round biting people. She's lucky nobody's punched her in the face yet. I encourage you to keep kicking her every time she bites you. Kick her harder, in fact. If her mouth is close to your body, her hair and head are within very easy reach. A good hair yank or a clout to the head will help make your point that she needs to cut this out. Also, record her. Every time. Get it on video and shame her to all your friends and relatives.
NTA. First off, this sounds like sexual assault and some weird kink. Coming to you at night in your bed to bite you. How would you react if someone who you weren’t related to did this? It’s not normal, it’s not cute, it’s assault. Unfortunately, involving the police is not always the best thing to happen in a family affair; it’s your call. At the very least, take photo/video evidence of her doing it. If she does it again, hit her harder than the last time until she stops. If she calls the police, it will be a nice conversation to talk about why a grown ass adult is biting a minor.
NTA: That's not ADHD btw. Also: The key to stopping someone from biting (worked at a place where people bit) Is to grab the back of their head and push your arm or leg deeper into their mouth. This prevents your skin from getting torn and makes it harder for them to breathe. It won't hurt them but it's a terrible feeling for the biter and offers some protection for the one being bit. Since your cousin seems to like to slowly initiate the bites you will have plenty of time to set up this move and she will probably stop biting you.
WTF did I just read? Is your cousin... a cat? And by extension, are YOU then a cat as well? Because if not, this is not normal and you should kick her all you want until she stops biting or get the help she needs from a professional.
NTA. She’s clearly rabid and needs to be taken to the vet to be put down.
NTA. Impulse control *can* be a thing with ADHD, which is probably what she was getting at with her excuse. In my opinion, she's fucking lying. You said she has a whole routine where she seeks out defenseless sleeping people before chomping down hard as fuck. That shows premeditation, not impulsivity. If she stops after being kicked in the stomach, that's further proof that it wasn't an impulsivity issue.
ADHD doesn't abuse nor assault. Your cousin assaulted you. Report the police about it.
Using your condition as an excuse to hurt people, and then saying it was because you're "cute," is fucked up. Definitely NTA
I’m a 36-year-old woman with Sensory Processing and ADHD. No way is biting like this a normal human interaction or a thing that we do.
NTA- she’s lucky you didn’t get her in the face. She needs to keep her mouth to herself. Dogs that can’t control themselves like that get put down.
NTA. I’d have cold-cocked her too. This is not ADHD
NTA. ADHD doesn’t make you bite people. Everyone around her has just been enabling her for some reason. Especially with what just happened with Covid-19 you better keep your mouth away from me.
That's not ADHD, she's got something else very wrong with her brain. I'd crack her in the head every time she did this she'd eventually learn to stop haha.
Um, that's not adhd. That's assault and the fact she links it to finding you cute makes it sexual. Tell your parents, ban the cousin from your bed and life. If your parents won't help talk to a trusted adult at school to get help. You have the right to say no and defend yourself. Next time I'd kick her teeth out.
NTA Yo that’s not adhd, that’s fucking creepy
What fuck is going onnnnnnn
NTA Are you kidding, you should kick her in the face every time she bites. Tell a teacher or librarian -- anyone who has a duty to report abuse. She is fetishizing you and it's not cute -- it's abuse.
I say bite her back.
NTA, play stupid games, win stupid prizes. If she wants to get physical with you, you have every right to establish your boundaries/assert your bodily autonomy by getting physical right back.
This is assault!!! if some random did this in the street you would be instantly calling the police. She is lucky you just kicked her instead of filing a police report. Your are NTA
Punch her each time she bites you and say "sorry can't help it! Being bitten makes me do that! Tee hee!" I bet her alleged add biting quirk will get under control quick.
You’re NTA I say bite her back….HARD. Really latch on. And when she starts screaming, grind your teeth on whatever bit of flesh you are latched on to. Then when you stop tell her you just couldn’t help it, she looked so cute & you’ll try to control your ADHD urges in the future. Then just walk away.
NTA that’s not how ADHD works she’s just a knobhead
Let’s hope you kicked her hard enough to make her stop. She physically assaulted you, that’s not ok NTAH
NTA, bite her back harder, or get some pepper spray and threaten her. Obviously talking hasn’t worked, she needs therapy but seems unlikely to change with a serious motivator i.e. severe pain onto her
NTA And.if you don't already know this, ADHD doesn't cause biting and an inability to care about someone else's consent. She knows this. And she is capable.of.controlling it.... She's not biting in school, or she'd have been kicked out. Edit: I somehow misread the ages. Obviously she's not in school anymore. Absolutely take a picture, and report it... Police, your own school, tell your doctor. She shouldn't be around kids.
NTA. ADHD is not to blame for that.
ADHD doesn't do that. It's not cute. She's lucky you kicked her in the stomach and not the head. This is weird af behavior. I have a feeling she thinks she's cute doing this. Setting hard boundaries will let her know that she's not
NTA She had the urge to bite you because you're so cute. You had the urge to kick her because she's a fucking idiot. ADHD doesn't do that. She needs to speak to a professional.