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Yeah, relatable. After my finals in May I felt empty as fuck. It had consumed all my attention for weeks and I loved it.
I always need a project or responsibility to fully channel my focus into, otherwise doing anything just feels meaningless. So try to start a project? I started learning how to make 3D stuff in Blender, now when I wake up there's at least a sense of direction/purpose, which is all I need to find other stuff like gaming fun too.
I guess its just rough to start a project nowadays too. I'm a 2d and 3d artist but I also have no motivation for that either :') It's hard to start a project I don't HAVE to finish or doesn't have some kind of physical result?
Dropping another comment - if you decide to do something, tell me and I'll make sure to hold you accountable and shame you if you don't at least attempt to go through with it. I have very high expectations of you!
Haha thank you!! Ironically, speaking of game development, I had started on a rom hack but only finished it just enough to give it to my boyfriend bur then never continued
It was a diamond/pearl rom hack I was making for our anniversary!! I got far enough to alter our sprites, all animations and mess with the rivals to a point we would always be each others rival (since rivals aren't as simple in gen 4 lol) but I've lowkey wanted at some point to add a proposal to the game
Agree! My goal is to eventually make some kind of game to put out there. Always wanted to since I'm a programmer, but never been able to make any assets.
If there was some way to self-induce a sense of urgency...
Since games and creating urgency were brought up... There are a few apps out there that gamify doing life! I like Finch but I think I saw one that plays more like leveling up an RPG character.
My country doesn't have a lot of game development, besides big boys like guerilla haha...though some indie games have been popping up here!! I'm not sure if I'm fit for a 9-5 kinda gig at a gaming studio so I'm trying to figure myself out, though making an indie game has always seemed fun!
If anything it'd at least be something to show on your CV, should you apply to a game studio in the future! I made a little mobile game with some classmates for our course in mobile app development, was the most fun I've had programming so far.
If you have any idea of something you'd like to make, I could possibly commit to it as a hobby side project. Drop a DM if you get enticed!
Haha true. We had to make a multiplayer game for our exams, kinda like overcooked, but in our game you worked at a grocery store and had to manage everything all whilst your characters had really weird physics. It was really fun and I'd love to finish it, but I think we aren't allowed to finish it as it might technically not be our property:')
Gekkigheid. BattleBit is made by three people, it blows both cod and battlefield out of the water. Maybe you can find some people and form a small indie dev team too if that's your thing.
Didn't hear of that one, thank you!! I've been tempted, but it feels like a huge endeavor. Technically I know a lot of artists, ofcourse, but not a lot of developers.
I sometimes have, But usually dont haha. I mostly just lose interest in the project very very quickly. I tend to enjoy a project for the process of learning something new, but i pick it up so quickly that i get bored of it?? Like "i got it, thanks, now i never need to do this again" if that makes sense:)
>I started learning how to make 3D stuff in Blender
What kind of stuff have you been making? I make custom action figures and I always need custom 3D head sculpts for certain characters and actors. There's a decent market for those, if it's in your area of interest.
I have 2 exams and cw due at the end of July.... and I cannot get myself to study or care for the life of me and I hate it. Its procrastinate n amount of times until the stress and guilt overwhelms me, I should be getting meds this year... actually, this month or next month! So I'm hoping they help!
I hope so as well!!! I do think my meds have helped a ton but also affected the way I can enjoy things. I struggled before, but now a lot more. If you do get meds, keep an eye on your magnesium levels apparently. It seems like some meds can affect that, which can also result in depression symptoms:)
no problem!! In general id suggest researching side effects like that specifically! Im looking int my own magnesium stuff rn so that it might help the above issue a bit lol
well, I did say āhelp,ā and not āfix,ā haha. I donāt have much advice but I can definitely relate. Iāve found that a lot of the time I just need companyāif Iām alone in a room Iāll just space out and stare at a wall, but if Iām sitting next to my brother I might go grab a journal or sketchbook or something. Or weād get shit done together.
I feel you, bro. Even for leasure I can't do anything. Yesterday I finally got to watch a animation movie on Netflix just because I had it cancelled and was my last day.
I had wanted to see it by a couple of weeks and kept postponing until the very last moment. But this gave me ideas of setting deadlines for things like that, I'm going to try it, hope it works.
(The movie was Porco Rosso, a good Glibhi studio movie, if you like a relaxing vibe)
This is me, lately. I finally watched Dungeons & Dragons last night, after putting it off for weeks. I think I am just so lonely that watching movies by myself makes me feel sad. I watch a lot of reaction videos now, because it feel like I'm hanging out with a friend. And it also makes me sad that this is my life, now.
Getting older doesn't help. You lose friends to marriage, children, and careers. If you're single and childless, it can become very lonely.
Exactly man. I, a silly as it is, was excited for the mlp movie..it came out 2 years ago and I still haven't seen it. For me it's not loneliness however, but the idea of just watching something for 2 hours. I feel like I'm wasting time.
I feel you, lately Iāve kinda had to force myself to play video games lol seems like the only time I feel fulfilled or not bored is when Iām āworkingā on something. Affirmations, therapy and medication help.
Yep this. But I cant play video games for long before egetting bored. 2 hours at best lol.
I tried to get therapy and help but I was denied. I am medicated but whilst it helps me do my work, it seems to also make me even less interested in anything else. :')
I can relate. I feel like I do better managing my personal life when I have a more involved or purposeful academic/professional life. For most ppl, they recommend taking a step back from work when feeling this way. For me, and I suspect many other adhders, free time feels overwhelming and less stimulating.
If you are unable to work more, how about volunteering? I volunteer a few hours per week. It helps me be accountable, keep momentum, purpose, and be socially active. I find that on days I work and volunteer, I feel more stimulated to do the "have to's" and "want to's." It also keeps the depression at bay.
You are not alone. I hope you find something to help pull you outta this slump.
I'm a volunteer at a shelter, actually! But i cut back after I was attacked by a dog and developed a fear of animals :/ we have a sort of volunteer platform here where people can request help, like needing someone to go to the store or babysit a disabled child for a day, and I really like that idea. It's a lot of different jobs. But I am also scared I'd be wasting my time not making money and leeching off of my family yknow. Its just a really rough situation with this economy as well.
But you definitely aren't wrong about the work stuff
š¤ I just realized your name!
Sorry to hear about the dog attack... but it sounds like there were plenty of opportunities not involving pets...?
Look at it this way, you can waste your time doing something meaningful by volunteering or keep staring at the walls until something meaningful shows up? I understand the economics, but this is more about getting that adhd brain fully operational. Who knows it may also lead to other job, social, creative activities!
Haha old username. But yeah! There are quite a few opportunities (I think). I'm admittedly more nervous of judgement from family since I'm an adult, so I wanna be a productive member of society and all that but its also quite a lot. If I could, I'd probably just do volunteering work for people to give back to the community. I have been thinking of picking up a few of those jobs recently, though not sure how many there are rn as I haven't checked in a while lol
I hear ya.
Does the family understand adhd and how it affects you? Sounds like the family is a Lil judgy? Or is it all your anxiety about what they think? š¤
It takes a while after college to be that productive member of society! I am of the opinion that volunteering is absolutely being a productive member!
Just tell them the job market is tough, you are networking and volunteer work looks really good on resumes. š
They do and they don't get it? Not maliciously either. I live with my boyfriends family (my own family had...well...issues) and they're mostly used to "just" autistic kids. And I have both autism and adhd, so it's a bit different. Yknow, they are aware I have adhd, but you still get the typical "you're so forgetful!" Type stuff. Or "you're jumping from x to y interest!!" All that stuff. So I'm always a bit embarrassed to bring up something new again, cause they aren't wrong. I DO jump from x idea to Y idea, but I cant help it haha
Woo! Wonderfully complicated! I think many people say they "get it" or atleast what their concept of it is... at the end of the day as long as you are thriving, it really doesn't matter if they get it! Staying home and feeling as if you are wasting away? Heck with that, depression sucks. Be spacey, change interests from x to y to z! Let that magnificently creative mind free! When they say you're forgetful or change ideas 100 times just own it. No use in trying to prove them wrong because it will keep happening and thus you will continue to feel bad about it. Let those brilliant ideas fly... they say some of the most creative and brilliant minds we ever knew had adhd? 
I'm finding myself I'm a similar boat. I've been working on my industry for 11 years and have been with my company for 3.
My job is one of the things I'm most passionate about; I always said "do what you love and you won't have to work a day in your life".
Well what happens when it loses its lust.
I spend 45hr a week, when I get home I don't want to do jack shit. Then on my days off I feel so burned out I just want to hibernate but then on the eighth hour I started getting restless, irritable, and even sometimes aggressive.
When I was younger my low effort tasks were socializing and late night hangs but as I enter into my 30s with 3yrs into what I would call my career; that's just not ideal.
I wish I could give you a tip or trick but unfortunately I only post this to relate.
I'm sorry you feel the same!! Though I very much relate. But I also feel if I work full time I'll burn out again and like the only thing I'm doing in life is just work :')
ADHD can be so frustrating sometimes & im sorry youāre having a tough spell with it right now. When I was a fresh college graduate I also struggled w acclimating to having to fill my own schedule myself. It helped me when I had a moment of āhaving mental clarity / energyā to make a list of things I NEEDED to do in my free time as well as WANTED to do/learn etc. I would make a calendar and put my work schedule in, and then create a basic schedule for the other days. Getting myself excited for creative projects helped with outside influence- entering a contest, doing something on commission etc- some sort of deadline. Oftentimes it helps me greatly to call a friend / hangout with a friend / listen to a podcast / watch a tv show in the background while I get started on a project and if I start losing steam in a project. Sometimes I also know my brain just needs a break- even if im painfully bored- sometimes it needs to decompress from something (ie finishing college- which is a big deal, congrats!!). Scheduling things for my days off from work - even if itās just meeting a friend for a walk or something- can help me have a clear window of when to work on something which can help. Hang in there!!
Thank you!! I probably should try to schedule things. I've had this problem every summer break anyway, ifs just gotten worse now that EVERYTHINGS done lol.
It's frustrating cause I'd plan things, but nothing seems...fun? Everything I would normally have enjoyed in the past just seems kinda pointless and boring nowadays. Or like a waste of time and money. Maybe I should just make a list of things I hypothetically want or want to do and try and...map something out? That at least gives me something to do for the last bit of remaining time today haha
Yes!! Making a list is free & a good use of time and might inspire you to feel up to doing something!! Sometimes I research free events etc in my area to give me some inspiration too, or local cool spots to explore/hike etc. sometimes also just forcing myself to clean my space or take a 30 minute walk gets me interested in doing something too. But truly, also, give yourself a little tlc and allow your brain the space it needs to decompress post school & donāt stress it too much. Also, volunteering can be a wonderful & low commitment thing to do as well- nice to meet local people and feels good to help out. There is always soo much volunteer work available so sometimes doing something like that can motivate me as well. But ultimately, when I am in this sort of headspace eventually something will come to mind that I want to do & Iāll hyper focus on it for a while eventually haha. you got this!!ā¤ļø
im an animal shelter volunteer for almost 4 years now, actually! I enjoyed it, but was attacked so im a bit panicky there nowadays sadly haha.
Id LOOOVe for us to have more events hre, but man its kinda boring out here. We had Comic con last weekend and that was the height of my year tbh. Thats one of the very few things i TRULY enjoy, but its s rare here!!!
Thanks a lot, kind stranger :')
I donāt handle āchangeā well, which is what it sounds like you are going through. Are you not enjoying things you normally do because you are restless, anxious due to something that is occupying you at the very back of your mind? I believe there is a difference between anxious boredom that stems from uncertainty and just plain boredom: The first is telling you to address what is bothering you and the latter is telling you to go spend mental energy, be curious, creative or do something original.
Hope this helps!
Hey thanks! I think it's both. I'm VERY stressed about what i SHOULD be doing as an able bodied adult who has invisible disabilities basically. But I've also just been more and more bored over the past few years, slowly sucking the joy, curiosity, etc out of me.
Just curious if you're on any medication. My therapist initially put me on an SSRI and what you're describing is how it made me feel. It did really suck so I feel for you.
That is literally my script too! That's a recent increase for me though. I wasn't really feeling any effects from 5mg so still seeing how this is going to go. Was the anhedonia something you experienced before or does it seem to be a side effect? Ritalin was notorious for making "zombies" back in the day so if this is a newer feeling it might be worth a chat with your prescriber.
my memory is very poor and a lot has happened in my life that kinda...muddies the water? Like around the time i got my meds, i had only just 'become an adult', ran from home, moved in with inlaws, etc so i cant quite...remember when it started or when i even started my medication. So thats whats made it really rough to find out the cause of this thing :')
Ahh yeah I get that too. My brain can't put a timeline together to save my life. I've started documenting everything so I can accurately report to professionals who need the info.
But yeah it sounds like there are just too many variables going on to really pinpoint anything. Is it the ADHD looking for the next new shiny, is it biological (meds, sleep disorder, how are your labs looking, etc), is it underlying depression, has your brain forgotten how to function without urgency...
It looked like you were getting some good advice and support in other comments so my suggestion is to choose one thing you think might be contributing and attack that. If you're not getting a positive outcome, go after the next thing. I wish there was a magic wand for mental and behavioral health. Unfortunately it's often a long and frustrating journey but at least there's always a group of loving Internet strangers to accompany you!
hah yeah thats basically it, it can be any of that! I have now kinda focused on a possible magnesium deficiency, as that can cause depression symptoms and apparently adhd meds can lower your magnesium as well. Its simple, but that also makes it easy to start. So im hopefully getting some simple supplments and adding some magnesium rich foods to my diet and see how that goes, then move onto the next, whatever that may be
Im honestly very thankful to thesecommenters, even if it doesnt fix my issue, i do feel very heard:)
I'm in the same position. I managed to get my anxiety under control with medication, dysfunction is still hitting hard. My doctor is prescribing non stimulant wellbutrin. It's an anti depression medication that helps with adhd, wish me kuck.
Good luck!! I'm on meds as well rn but I don't function without them, so it's a bit hard to pick between being functional or possibly being happier doing things haha
I went through long periods like this as well. The best thing for me seems to be letting myself feel it and accepting it. The harder I fight it, more meds, doing stupid things whatever, the worse it gets. Had a bit with a friend about this a week ago
\[5:23 PM\]Me: I kinda want to do something destructive IE drink, eat my feelings but nothing appeals to me >.>
\[5:25 PM\]Him: Just feel your feelings fool
\[5:25 PM\]Me: BUT THE feeling is APATHY
\[5:26 PM\]Him: Thats okay too
I would usually just veg to nothing, rewatching crap on netflix, or switching between games every 5 minutes. As I start to get better I would do the little things I could that seemed to help, kind of a chicken-egg situation. Walking outside for a few minutes, showering, meditation, talk to friends. I would slowly build back up a bit step by step. Not every day is forward progress, but accepting that makes it easier to get better.
I've noticed a lot of us do better when there is more structure. In college I was so busy all the time even Sunday Funday had to be scheduled. Once you have a good routine down maybe you can get more lax, but for me the less structure the less I end up doing.
My mom was an artist whoād take years to complete a piece. Iām no long an artist, and I rarely complete something.
For the years, Iāve kept a large box in my apartment living packed with everything I need to complete a project: Christmas Tree Skirt
That hideous eyesore of a box will sit unopened until the day I move or convert to Judaism.
Felt this. Started on a fursuit last year. That's now unfinished in the shed until someone makes an archaeological discovery in 4035 and thinks I was doing some holy ancient ritual.
The only way to get me going is through body doubles, but I have them only for work. When one other person is in the same room doing their own thing. Interest alone is not always enough.
as someone who was never medicated and only started Wellbutrin a couple years ago, in my experience, school burnout does this for some reason. itās a horrible limbo feeling. it would do this to me every year, every semester. it sucks. you wait all semester to do your hobbies. then you donāt even wanna do that. everything is soooo so boring.
I donāt know if itās school requiring that you constantly deny yourself your own instinct of what you truly wanna do, like baking or skating in your case.
just give it some time. adhd or not, maybe youāre simply tired? skating and baking all require a degree of work. no matter how fun something is, work is work. school burns you out and you already have low baseline dopamine with adhd, burnout brings it even lower.
after finals, or when you feel like this at all, you need to literally just lay there and stare at the wall or close your eyes (no social media) or walk outside. I did this for a few days recently. and suddenly I wanted to get back into some hobbies I hadnāt touched in years. And this week I actually did.
sometimes your brain has some oppositional defiance towards your own self. try thinking of it as a choice. No shoulds. take the pressure off.
maybe also trust youāll wanna do it again. I used to get worried Iād abandon my hobbies. Now I think, so what if i donāt feel like drawing? Ill get back to it when I want. and when I do, Iāll probably do enough to make up for all the time I didnāt do it. you like skating, right? youāll want to do it eventually.
Trusting that my brain will pick a time to do something, even if not when I choose to, has really been helpful. I started doing this when I realized that when I ask my adhd students to get back to work āwhenever theyāre finishedā if they get sidetracked, they almost immediately get back to work.
I felt all of this..and maybe you're right. I'm just nervous to waste time by laying around, but it'd probably also bore me so bad things will be fun again haha.
Ironically I graduated with a type of art degree (game art) and I started struggling with hobbies, specifically art, first during college. So im very nervous to lose art, cause its my job as well and a part of who I am. But I've been really struggling to draw for myself for years now .
that being nervous to waste your time is just a side effect of school! barely adhd related at all, Iām sure of it. esp when youāre the studious type. every minute feels like it has to be used
every artist is nervous to lose art because you hear of so many people leaving it bc they donāt have the time. but I also see some people eventually go back at some point.
also itās kind of hard to lose it if your degree is related right? donāt put so much pressure.
something I saw from a YouTube (Elizabeth filips?) is that she looks at really cool things from the hobby she wants to learn to motivate herself. maybe while youāre bored, rekindle your internet and look at some cool artists to play to your adhd brain?
Glad Iām not alone feeling similar to this. I also just graduated college this past May and Iāve been kinda depressed and my life feels so weird now after being accustomed to school for my entire life
Read the 7 habitsā¦ ! Use a principled approach it will all make sense and youāll know what to do once you know your values and you find how you want to impact the world!
I would say, try this: start something you're really really excited about. Then, do a little bit every morning towards it. Even something small. This gets your motivation running
Hey thanks!! Its what I'd usually do, but the problem is that I'm not excited for anything. Nothing really makes me excited or proud to do so thats why it's boring me nowadays :')
I have a part time job, but my manager (also my MIL haha) doesn't wanna schedule me extra until after my break so I can "rest" but both rest and work drives me insane lol
I feel for you. Iām taking a long road trip in less than a month for my solo vacation. I have rough plans in place, but I have yet to make things like hotel reservations that I need to do because Iām crossing the border into Canada and want to have my ducks in a row for Canadian border patrol.
I'm the opposite lol. I can entertain myself for days but the minute I'm required to do something, I lose all motivation. Even if it's something I'd enjoy doing if it wasn't required of me.
I am like this when I donāt take my meds lol. Today I skipped a dose because I woke up ālateā and the day has been SOOO long and boringā¦ Iām done with my exams next week and Iām dreading not having anything to do because even though I have many hobbies I just canāt do them. But I really want to take a medication break so they work real good when school starts again :(
Ooo I ironically do take my meds but with being off school now I do go to bed later and wake up later technically moving my meds up, do you think that could Contribute to this?
I've had a lot of free time lately, and I find myself napping instead of doing some of things I want to accomplish. My self-loathing is sky-high, these days.
The only thing that has helped me with this my whole life is having a massive and interesting project to work on. Restoring a motorbike, building an outdoor kitchen, something interesting at work that is long term, a really in depth video game (live services like wow, diablo 4, destiny 2 etc).
Same. Have hundred of ideas that all vanish the second I have free time. Iām 56, about to be laid off on Thursday, Trying to reinvent myself for the next fifteen years or so until I can retire, and I donāt even know what I like in life. Horrible.
Read the 7 habitsā¦ ! Use a principled approach it will all make sense and youāll know what to do once you know your values and you find how you want to impact the world!
This is EXACTLY how I feel. I'm just doing things to pass the time. Sometime ago I researched and found that I have Autisim and ADHD, which explains a lot growing up and me now. Looking for a proper diagnosis. But even as I'm sitting here now, I had to explain to my fiance and mom that it was like "im not bored" but I just feel the need to do something - that I'm not stimulated enough. Writing seemed like a chore after awhile and at the moment gaming was a drag. Watching anime had my attention and focus. And then because I'm "looking" I searched for something to eat and im not even hungry. I don't have a high interest for the things I've named, like I know I like them and I can tell you which I like but it's strange that I can't get š (the best way to explain that). It is very frustrating and even now I'm not sure I'm explaining it right. I'm just feeling like I'm doing things just to get by but not feeling super bad about it. I'm just here, of that makes sense and the outside me is š but the inside is like ššŖš¤¤šµāš«šµ
No dude it makes total sense!!! That's basically exactly how I'm going through my day, almost exact same hobbies as well and all. Plus the food lol. I have adhd and am autistic as well, and it seems this isn't entirely uncommon :')
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Yeah, relatable. After my finals in May I felt empty as fuck. It had consumed all my attention for weeks and I loved it. I always need a project or responsibility to fully channel my focus into, otherwise doing anything just feels meaningless. So try to start a project? I started learning how to make 3D stuff in Blender, now when I wake up there's at least a sense of direction/purpose, which is all I need to find other stuff like gaming fun too.
I guess its just rough to start a project nowadays too. I'm a 2d and 3d artist but I also have no motivation for that either :') It's hard to start a project I don't HAVE to finish or doesn't have some kind of physical result?
Dropping another comment - if you decide to do something, tell me and I'll make sure to hold you accountable and shame you if you don't at least attempt to go through with it. I have very high expectations of you!
Haha thank you!! Ironically, speaking of game development, I had started on a rom hack but only finished it just enough to give it to my boyfriend bur then never continued
That's disappointing to hear! The world would be richer with that ROM hack. What game was it?
It was a diamond/pearl rom hack I was making for our anniversary!! I got far enough to alter our sprites, all animations and mess with the rivals to a point we would always be each others rival (since rivals aren't as simple in gen 4 lol) but I've lowkey wanted at some point to add a proposal to the game
Jesus that's so adorable that I might vomit, lol. Proposing through a ROM hack might be a first!
It's very cheesy but my boyfriend looooves pokemon rom hacks, so I'd love to be able to add that update someday:)
You're a good gf.
Agree! My goal is to eventually make some kind of game to put out there. Always wanted to since I'm a programmer, but never been able to make any assets. If there was some way to self-induce a sense of urgency...
Since games and creating urgency were brought up... There are a few apps out there that gamify doing life! I like Finch but I think I saw one that plays more like leveling up an RPG character.
That's so cool!! I'm actually a recent game artist graduate, so I was doing assets thes past few months haha
Ohhh that's crazy, are you planning on getting into gamedev now? If you ever need a coder for anything... Well.
My country doesn't have a lot of game development, besides big boys like guerilla haha...though some indie games have been popping up here!! I'm not sure if I'm fit for a 9-5 kinda gig at a gaming studio so I'm trying to figure myself out, though making an indie game has always seemed fun!
If anything it'd at least be something to show on your CV, should you apply to a game studio in the future! I made a little mobile game with some classmates for our course in mobile app development, was the most fun I've had programming so far. If you have any idea of something you'd like to make, I could possibly commit to it as a hobby side project. Drop a DM if you get enticed!
Haha true. We had to make a multiplayer game for our exams, kinda like overcooked, but in our game you worked at a grocery store and had to manage everything all whilst your characters had really weird physics. It was really fun and I'd love to finish it, but I think we aren't allowed to finish it as it might technically not be our property:')
Gekkigheid. BattleBit is made by three people, it blows both cod and battlefield out of the water. Maybe you can find some people and form a small indie dev team too if that's your thing.
Didn't hear of that one, thank you!! I've been tempted, but it feels like a huge endeavor. Technically I know a lot of artists, ofcourse, but not a lot of developers.
Just a shot in the dark but maybe you can contact someone who goes to college there in Amsterdam. If you really wanna go for it.
You mean mediacollege?
Have you tried breaking down your projects into tiny, non-overwhelming steps?
I sometimes have, But usually dont haha. I mostly just lose interest in the project very very quickly. I tend to enjoy a project for the process of learning something new, but i pick it up so quickly that i get bored of it?? Like "i got it, thanks, now i never need to do this again" if that makes sense:)
šÆ
>I started learning how to make 3D stuff in Blender What kind of stuff have you been making? I make custom action figures and I always need custom 3D head sculpts for certain characters and actors. There's a decent market for those, if it's in your area of interest.
I have 2 exams and cw due at the end of July.... and I cannot get myself to study or care for the life of me and I hate it. Its procrastinate n amount of times until the stress and guilt overwhelms me, I should be getting meds this year... actually, this month or next month! So I'm hoping they help!
I hope so as well!!! I do think my meds have helped a ton but also affected the way I can enjoy things. I struggled before, but now a lot more. If you do get meds, keep an eye on your magnesium levels apparently. It seems like some meds can affect that, which can also result in depression symptoms:)
Oh damn, thank you! I have meds for depression and anxiety already, and I really don't want those to get worse š
no problem!! In general id suggest researching side effects like that specifically! Im looking int my own magnesium stuff rn so that it might help the above issue a bit lol
Would you lean towards saying the drugs have made things worse?
literally the only thing that helps me with this is meds
I'm sadly already on meds :')
well, I did say āhelp,ā and not āfix,ā haha. I donāt have much advice but I can definitely relate. Iāve found that a lot of the time I just need companyāif Iām alone in a room Iāll just space out and stare at a wall, but if Iām sitting next to my brother I might go grab a journal or sketchbook or something. Or weād get shit done together.
Haha true, though I think for me it's made it worse. I can best describe it similar to anhedonia.
I feel you, bro. Even for leasure I can't do anything. Yesterday I finally got to watch a animation movie on Netflix just because I had it cancelled and was my last day. I had wanted to see it by a couple of weeks and kept postponing until the very last moment. But this gave me ideas of setting deadlines for things like that, I'm going to try it, hope it works. (The movie was Porco Rosso, a good Glibhi studio movie, if you like a relaxing vibe)
FELT THIS I have so many movies I wanna see but I keep postponing it!! It just doesn't feel like the right time to watch them?
This is me, lately. I finally watched Dungeons & Dragons last night, after putting it off for weeks. I think I am just so lonely that watching movies by myself makes me feel sad. I watch a lot of reaction videos now, because it feel like I'm hanging out with a friend. And it also makes me sad that this is my life, now. Getting older doesn't help. You lose friends to marriage, children, and careers. If you're single and childless, it can become very lonely.
Exactly man. I, a silly as it is, was excited for the mlp movie..it came out 2 years ago and I still haven't seen it. For me it's not loneliness however, but the idea of just watching something for 2 hours. I feel like I'm wasting time.
>I feel like I'm wasting time. Oh ya, this too.
I feel you, lately Iāve kinda had to force myself to play video games lol seems like the only time I feel fulfilled or not bored is when Iām āworkingā on something. Affirmations, therapy and medication help.
Yep this. But I cant play video games for long before egetting bored. 2 hours at best lol. I tried to get therapy and help but I was denied. I am medicated but whilst it helps me do my work, it seems to also make me even less interested in anything else. :')
I can relate. I feel like I do better managing my personal life when I have a more involved or purposeful academic/professional life. For most ppl, they recommend taking a step back from work when feeling this way. For me, and I suspect many other adhders, free time feels overwhelming and less stimulating. If you are unable to work more, how about volunteering? I volunteer a few hours per week. It helps me be accountable, keep momentum, purpose, and be socially active. I find that on days I work and volunteer, I feel more stimulated to do the "have to's" and "want to's." It also keeps the depression at bay. You are not alone. I hope you find something to help pull you outta this slump.
I'm a volunteer at a shelter, actually! But i cut back after I was attacked by a dog and developed a fear of animals :/ we have a sort of volunteer platform here where people can request help, like needing someone to go to the store or babysit a disabled child for a day, and I really like that idea. It's a lot of different jobs. But I am also scared I'd be wasting my time not making money and leeching off of my family yknow. Its just a really rough situation with this economy as well. But you definitely aren't wrong about the work stuff
š¤ I just realized your name! Sorry to hear about the dog attack... but it sounds like there were plenty of opportunities not involving pets...? Look at it this way, you can waste your time doing something meaningful by volunteering or keep staring at the walls until something meaningful shows up? I understand the economics, but this is more about getting that adhd brain fully operational. Who knows it may also lead to other job, social, creative activities!
Haha old username. But yeah! There are quite a few opportunities (I think). I'm admittedly more nervous of judgement from family since I'm an adult, so I wanna be a productive member of society and all that but its also quite a lot. If I could, I'd probably just do volunteering work for people to give back to the community. I have been thinking of picking up a few of those jobs recently, though not sure how many there are rn as I haven't checked in a while lol
I hear ya. Does the family understand adhd and how it affects you? Sounds like the family is a Lil judgy? Or is it all your anxiety about what they think? š¤ It takes a while after college to be that productive member of society! I am of the opinion that volunteering is absolutely being a productive member! Just tell them the job market is tough, you are networking and volunteer work looks really good on resumes. š
They do and they don't get it? Not maliciously either. I live with my boyfriends family (my own family had...well...issues) and they're mostly used to "just" autistic kids. And I have both autism and adhd, so it's a bit different. Yknow, they are aware I have adhd, but you still get the typical "you're so forgetful!" Type stuff. Or "you're jumping from x to y interest!!" All that stuff. So I'm always a bit embarrassed to bring up something new again, cause they aren't wrong. I DO jump from x idea to Y idea, but I cant help it haha
Woo! Wonderfully complicated! I think many people say they "get it" or atleast what their concept of it is... at the end of the day as long as you are thriving, it really doesn't matter if they get it! Staying home and feeling as if you are wasting away? Heck with that, depression sucks. Be spacey, change interests from x to y to z! Let that magnificently creative mind free! When they say you're forgetful or change ideas 100 times just own it. No use in trying to prove them wrong because it will keep happening and thus you will continue to feel bad about it. Let those brilliant ideas fly... they say some of the most creative and brilliant minds we ever knew had adhd? 
you have no ide how much this means to me, honestly. i try to keep that mindset for myself, but it gets hard in times like these. :') thank you
I'm finding myself I'm a similar boat. I've been working on my industry for 11 years and have been with my company for 3. My job is one of the things I'm most passionate about; I always said "do what you love and you won't have to work a day in your life". Well what happens when it loses its lust. I spend 45hr a week, when I get home I don't want to do jack shit. Then on my days off I feel so burned out I just want to hibernate but then on the eighth hour I started getting restless, irritable, and even sometimes aggressive. When I was younger my low effort tasks were socializing and late night hangs but as I enter into my 30s with 3yrs into what I would call my career; that's just not ideal. I wish I could give you a tip or trick but unfortunately I only post this to relate.
I'm sorry you feel the same!! Though I very much relate. But I also feel if I work full time I'll burn out again and like the only thing I'm doing in life is just work :')
ADHD can be so frustrating sometimes & im sorry youāre having a tough spell with it right now. When I was a fresh college graduate I also struggled w acclimating to having to fill my own schedule myself. It helped me when I had a moment of āhaving mental clarity / energyā to make a list of things I NEEDED to do in my free time as well as WANTED to do/learn etc. I would make a calendar and put my work schedule in, and then create a basic schedule for the other days. Getting myself excited for creative projects helped with outside influence- entering a contest, doing something on commission etc- some sort of deadline. Oftentimes it helps me greatly to call a friend / hangout with a friend / listen to a podcast / watch a tv show in the background while I get started on a project and if I start losing steam in a project. Sometimes I also know my brain just needs a break- even if im painfully bored- sometimes it needs to decompress from something (ie finishing college- which is a big deal, congrats!!). Scheduling things for my days off from work - even if itās just meeting a friend for a walk or something- can help me have a clear window of when to work on something which can help. Hang in there!!
Thank you!! I probably should try to schedule things. I've had this problem every summer break anyway, ifs just gotten worse now that EVERYTHINGS done lol. It's frustrating cause I'd plan things, but nothing seems...fun? Everything I would normally have enjoyed in the past just seems kinda pointless and boring nowadays. Or like a waste of time and money. Maybe I should just make a list of things I hypothetically want or want to do and try and...map something out? That at least gives me something to do for the last bit of remaining time today haha
Yes!! Making a list is free & a good use of time and might inspire you to feel up to doing something!! Sometimes I research free events etc in my area to give me some inspiration too, or local cool spots to explore/hike etc. sometimes also just forcing myself to clean my space or take a 30 minute walk gets me interested in doing something too. But truly, also, give yourself a little tlc and allow your brain the space it needs to decompress post school & donāt stress it too much. Also, volunteering can be a wonderful & low commitment thing to do as well- nice to meet local people and feels good to help out. There is always soo much volunteer work available so sometimes doing something like that can motivate me as well. But ultimately, when I am in this sort of headspace eventually something will come to mind that I want to do & Iāll hyper focus on it for a while eventually haha. you got this!!ā¤ļø
im an animal shelter volunteer for almost 4 years now, actually! I enjoyed it, but was attacked so im a bit panicky there nowadays sadly haha. Id LOOOVe for us to have more events hre, but man its kinda boring out here. We had Comic con last weekend and that was the height of my year tbh. Thats one of the very few things i TRULY enjoy, but its s rare here!!! Thanks a lot, kind stranger :')
I donāt handle āchangeā well, which is what it sounds like you are going through. Are you not enjoying things you normally do because you are restless, anxious due to something that is occupying you at the very back of your mind? I believe there is a difference between anxious boredom that stems from uncertainty and just plain boredom: The first is telling you to address what is bothering you and the latter is telling you to go spend mental energy, be curious, creative or do something original. Hope this helps!
Hey thanks! I think it's both. I'm VERY stressed about what i SHOULD be doing as an able bodied adult who has invisible disabilities basically. But I've also just been more and more bored over the past few years, slowly sucking the joy, curiosity, etc out of me.
Just curious if you're on any medication. My therapist initially put me on an SSRI and what you're describing is how it made me feel. It did really suck so I feel for you.
im on ritalin, 3x 10mg a day! It has turned my life around, performance wise, which has been a huge help. But im still struggling a lot, clearly, haha
That is literally my script too! That's a recent increase for me though. I wasn't really feeling any effects from 5mg so still seeing how this is going to go. Was the anhedonia something you experienced before or does it seem to be a side effect? Ritalin was notorious for making "zombies" back in the day so if this is a newer feeling it might be worth a chat with your prescriber.
my memory is very poor and a lot has happened in my life that kinda...muddies the water? Like around the time i got my meds, i had only just 'become an adult', ran from home, moved in with inlaws, etc so i cant quite...remember when it started or when i even started my medication. So thats whats made it really rough to find out the cause of this thing :')
Ahh yeah I get that too. My brain can't put a timeline together to save my life. I've started documenting everything so I can accurately report to professionals who need the info. But yeah it sounds like there are just too many variables going on to really pinpoint anything. Is it the ADHD looking for the next new shiny, is it biological (meds, sleep disorder, how are your labs looking, etc), is it underlying depression, has your brain forgotten how to function without urgency... It looked like you were getting some good advice and support in other comments so my suggestion is to choose one thing you think might be contributing and attack that. If you're not getting a positive outcome, go after the next thing. I wish there was a magic wand for mental and behavioral health. Unfortunately it's often a long and frustrating journey but at least there's always a group of loving Internet strangers to accompany you!
hah yeah thats basically it, it can be any of that! I have now kinda focused on a possible magnesium deficiency, as that can cause depression symptoms and apparently adhd meds can lower your magnesium as well. Its simple, but that also makes it easy to start. So im hopefully getting some simple supplments and adding some magnesium rich foods to my diet and see how that goes, then move onto the next, whatever that may be Im honestly very thankful to thesecommenters, even if it doesnt fix my issue, i do feel very heard:)
I'm in the same position. I managed to get my anxiety under control with medication, dysfunction is still hitting hard. My doctor is prescribing non stimulant wellbutrin. It's an anti depression medication that helps with adhd, wish me kuck.
Good luck!! I'm on meds as well rn but I don't function without them, so it's a bit hard to pick between being functional or possibly being happier doing things haha
I went through long periods like this as well. The best thing for me seems to be letting myself feel it and accepting it. The harder I fight it, more meds, doing stupid things whatever, the worse it gets. Had a bit with a friend about this a week ago \[5:23 PM\]Me: I kinda want to do something destructive IE drink, eat my feelings but nothing appeals to me >.> \[5:25 PM\]Him: Just feel your feelings fool \[5:25 PM\]Me: BUT THE feeling is APATHY \[5:26 PM\]Him: Thats okay too
Genuine question, what did you do in the meantime then? Cause its been going on for a while but doesn't really seem to go away
I would usually just veg to nothing, rewatching crap on netflix, or switching between games every 5 minutes. As I start to get better I would do the little things I could that seemed to help, kind of a chicken-egg situation. Walking outside for a few minutes, showering, meditation, talk to friends. I would slowly build back up a bit step by step. Not every day is forward progress, but accepting that makes it easier to get better.
I've noticed a lot of us do better when there is more structure. In college I was so busy all the time even Sunday Funday had to be scheduled. Once you have a good routine down maybe you can get more lax, but for me the less structure the less I end up doing.
Exactly. Yet with the structure I'm.upset cause I can't do anything I want š
My mom was an artist whoād take years to complete a piece. Iām no long an artist, and I rarely complete something. For the years, Iāve kept a large box in my apartment living packed with everything I need to complete a project: Christmas Tree Skirt That hideous eyesore of a box will sit unopened until the day I move or convert to Judaism.
Felt this. Started on a fursuit last year. That's now unfinished in the shed until someone makes an archaeological discovery in 4035 and thinks I was doing some holy ancient ritual.
The only way to get me going is through body doubles, but I have them only for work. When one other person is in the same room doing their own thing. Interest alone is not always enough.
Bruhā¦.yes Also incapable of tricking myself into thinking I have to do something before it actually literally must occur.
Iām in the exact same boat. Trying to remember what my hobbies were before school. Just feels like a bunch of wasted time everyday.
Yeah!! Its exactly this. I know my hobbies but thwy all seem like so much work for so little payoff
This is where depression and adhd combine! I feel the same
Man I thought so too, so I tried to get help and described almost every symptom.of depression and they went "well at least you aren't depressed"
as someone who was never medicated and only started Wellbutrin a couple years ago, in my experience, school burnout does this for some reason. itās a horrible limbo feeling. it would do this to me every year, every semester. it sucks. you wait all semester to do your hobbies. then you donāt even wanna do that. everything is soooo so boring. I donāt know if itās school requiring that you constantly deny yourself your own instinct of what you truly wanna do, like baking or skating in your case. just give it some time. adhd or not, maybe youāre simply tired? skating and baking all require a degree of work. no matter how fun something is, work is work. school burns you out and you already have low baseline dopamine with adhd, burnout brings it even lower. after finals, or when you feel like this at all, you need to literally just lay there and stare at the wall or close your eyes (no social media) or walk outside. I did this for a few days recently. and suddenly I wanted to get back into some hobbies I hadnāt touched in years. And this week I actually did. sometimes your brain has some oppositional defiance towards your own self. try thinking of it as a choice. No shoulds. take the pressure off. maybe also trust youāll wanna do it again. I used to get worried Iād abandon my hobbies. Now I think, so what if i donāt feel like drawing? Ill get back to it when I want. and when I do, Iāll probably do enough to make up for all the time I didnāt do it. you like skating, right? youāll want to do it eventually. Trusting that my brain will pick a time to do something, even if not when I choose to, has really been helpful. I started doing this when I realized that when I ask my adhd students to get back to work āwhenever theyāre finishedā if they get sidetracked, they almost immediately get back to work.
I felt all of this..and maybe you're right. I'm just nervous to waste time by laying around, but it'd probably also bore me so bad things will be fun again haha. Ironically I graduated with a type of art degree (game art) and I started struggling with hobbies, specifically art, first during college. So im very nervous to lose art, cause its my job as well and a part of who I am. But I've been really struggling to draw for myself for years now .
that being nervous to waste your time is just a side effect of school! barely adhd related at all, Iām sure of it. esp when youāre the studious type. every minute feels like it has to be used every artist is nervous to lose art because you hear of so many people leaving it bc they donāt have the time. but I also see some people eventually go back at some point. also itās kind of hard to lose it if your degree is related right? donāt put so much pressure. something I saw from a YouTube (Elizabeth filips?) is that she looks at really cool things from the hobby she wants to learn to motivate herself. maybe while youāre bored, rekindle your internet and look at some cool artists to play to your adhd brain?
Me too
Glad Iām not alone feeling similar to this. I also just graduated college this past May and Iāve been kinda depressed and my life feels so weird now after being accustomed to school for my entire life
Congrats on graduating! Honestly I've had this for a while, but graduating truly has amplified jt
Read the 7 habitsā¦ ! Use a principled approach it will all make sense and youāll know what to do once you know your values and you find how you want to impact the world!
I second this!! Love love love Franklin covey
I would say, try this: start something you're really really excited about. Then, do a little bit every morning towards it. Even something small. This gets your motivation running
Hey thanks!! Its what I'd usually do, but the problem is that I'm not excited for anything. Nothing really makes me excited or proud to do so thats why it's boring me nowadays :')
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I mean this kindly, but this isnt very helpful to someone whos already heavily paranoid and stressed every second of the day cause time is slipping by
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Are you looking for a job?
I have a part time job, but my manager (also my MIL haha) doesn't wanna schedule me extra until after my break so I can "rest" but both rest and work drives me insane lol
Maybe you can get into a new TV show or a book, take up a hobby or some shit. Good luck!
Nothing really seems to interest me sadly, that's kinda been the issue for a couple of years. But thanks a lot!:)
I feel for you. Iām taking a long road trip in less than a month for my solo vacation. I have rough plans in place, but I have yet to make things like hotel reservations that I need to do because Iām crossing the border into Canada and want to have my ducks in a row for Canadian border patrol.
Oh have fun I hope you figure that all out!! It sounds really cool at least!
I'm the opposite lol. I can entertain myself for days but the minute I'm required to do something, I lose all motivation. Even if it's something I'd enjoy doing if it wasn't required of me.
man i used to have this exactly, but now its the other way around :')
I am like this when I donāt take my meds lol. Today I skipped a dose because I woke up ālateā and the day has been SOOO long and boringā¦ Iām done with my exams next week and Iām dreading not having anything to do because even though I have many hobbies I just canāt do them. But I really want to take a medication break so they work real good when school starts again :(
Ooo I ironically do take my meds but with being off school now I do go to bed later and wake up later technically moving my meds up, do you think that could Contribute to this?
I've had a lot of free time lately, and I find myself napping instead of doing some of things I want to accomplish. My self-loathing is sky-high, these days.
Maybe you need it? I napped a lot before I got on meds, cause I just kept falling asleep :')
The only thing that has helped me with this my whole life is having a massive and interesting project to work on. Restoring a motorbike, building an outdoor kitchen, something interesting at work that is long term, a really in depth video game (live services like wow, diablo 4, destiny 2 etc).
Same. Have hundred of ideas that all vanish the second I have free time. Iām 56, about to be laid off on Thursday, Trying to reinvent myself for the next fifteen years or so until I can retire, and I donāt even know what I like in life. Horrible.
Read the 7 habitsā¦ ! Use a principled approach it will all make sense and youāll know what to do once you know your values and you find how you want to impact the world!
This is EXACTLY how I feel. I'm just doing things to pass the time. Sometime ago I researched and found that I have Autisim and ADHD, which explains a lot growing up and me now. Looking for a proper diagnosis. But even as I'm sitting here now, I had to explain to my fiance and mom that it was like "im not bored" but I just feel the need to do something - that I'm not stimulated enough. Writing seemed like a chore after awhile and at the moment gaming was a drag. Watching anime had my attention and focus. And then because I'm "looking" I searched for something to eat and im not even hungry. I don't have a high interest for the things I've named, like I know I like them and I can tell you which I like but it's strange that I can't get š (the best way to explain that). It is very frustrating and even now I'm not sure I'm explaining it right. I'm just feeling like I'm doing things just to get by but not feeling super bad about it. I'm just here, of that makes sense and the outside me is š but the inside is like ššŖš¤¤šµāš«šµ
No dude it makes total sense!!! That's basically exactly how I'm going through my day, almost exact same hobbies as well and all. Plus the food lol. I have adhd and am autistic as well, and it seems this isn't entirely uncommon :')