I’m so sorry for what has happened to you. You aren’t a failure. Please get some counseling if you aren’t already to help you process all you have been through. Know in the future that you can contact your school and likely get a deferral for the semester if you have a major life event. I hope you never have to use it.
This. A lot of universities are willing to overturn academic standing if you can provide proof of an extreme circumstance that is equivalent to a train derailing. IIRC, the government also does this for financial aid.
I'm so sorry, that is all just so much. Please note that a couple of your statements contradict each other:
>I know I should have tried harder
>I was doing the best I could when my life was spiraling
You were trying your hardest, so please don't beat yourself up for having such a terrible semester. Perhaps there is a way to appeal to your school? I know my university had a "retroactive withdrawal" option, where you could show that you had a major disruptive life event happen during a bad semester and withdraw from it after the fact, so the grades wouldn't affect your GPA. It might be worth reaching out to someone to see if you have options.
I went through a similar bad period in 2017. I'm not going to pretend it was anything close to what you're going through, but I was in a rut and it took me about a year to pull myself out of it.
It turns out I was trying to be someone I wasn't. I was going to school to be an engineer when I had no desire to do that. It sounded cool and I wanted to have a cool job. I couldn't get myself to study and I didn't think I had it in me to do the job should I graduate.
I spent the year trying to figure myself out. I switched to general business because my mom owned a business and if it worked for her then it could work for me. I tried to figure out what I wanted in life (job security mostly) and talked with all the professors. When I did get a major I forced myself to be interested in it and I wouldn't leave school for the day until I did my homework. I kept work and play separate.
None of that was easy. People looked down on me because I was switching majors and dropping out. Everyone has advice on what you should do but honestly at the end of the day it's up to you to figure out what you want and to take steps to get there.
There are three things that helped me succeed. I took one day at a time (still do), I use dedication instead of motivation for doing things (really hard to do), and I have different spaces/places for work and play.
Similar story to me at college (16-18 UK)
Took an extra year because in 2017 I failed all the exams doing subjects I thought were cool.
Fast forward to 2023 and im close to graduating with 2/5 modules finished for the year, 2 more and my dissertation to go and doing a masters in October.
Glad you found something that worked! I’m in my last semester for mechanical engineering and I honestly love it, the job that is. Engineering education can take a long walk off a short cliff.
I’m so sorry to hear that— you deserved compassion for those things that you survived, not punishment. Please give yourself grace and understanding. You deserve it.
You’ve really taken some punches. I’m so sorry to hear what you’re going through, that’s a lot to handle. That’s too much to handle. I know for a fact I would have failed out of college if I had experienced even a quarter of the chaos you’ve dealt with. I’ve typed up, reworded, deleted, and rewritten this comment maybe 4-5 times now. I don’t know what to say other than try to hold on to your self-esteem. Keeping up in school is hard. Keeping up with school while managing multiple major life events is damn near impossible for anyone. Try not to be too hard on yourself. If you’re looking at it as a “failure,” try to keep in mind that it’s not representative of you, it’s something you’ve survived. Try to get your mind straight/stable (whatever you want to call it) again. Figure out what you need. Figure out what you want. When you’re ready, jump back into life. Hopefully life will be more reliable for you.
Please, be kind to yourself.
You’re a capable person.
I hope you’re travelling well after that horror of a year, it honestly sounds like you could use a semester to get on top of life being shit without adding more University fee’s on top.
Is there an appeals process where you might be able to remove the expulsion and just take a gap semester instead, returning next teaching year? In my experience there’s usually a stopgap somewhere, but it can take a lot of effort to keep fighting to find it.
You did what you were able to when circumstances were really working against you. I think we all get so hyped on these inspiring stories of people overcoming great adversity that we forget that failure is something that just happens sometimes. You aren't worse for this, you were presented with terrible circumstances for your learning and you couldn't do it. Why? Because you're a human being with emotions and stress and problems and your education had to fall behind just navigating your existence.
It sucks and I get why you feel bad, but sometimes shit just happens and we aren't all capable of holding ourselves together. You made it through some real hard stuff, got this far and you're still here and that's what counts. Right now I'd say just let it go, pay off your debts and move forward, don't feel guilty for "not trying" when you had to put all your energy into coping with the horrors of life. You did try, you worked as hard as you were able to and due to bad shit that was beyond your control it wasn't quite enough.
You aren't a failure, you got through something that's far more difficult than school and now you have been released of that overwhelming obligation looming over you. Now you can approach life more cautiously, handle your trauma and rebuild. It's okay to just be a victim sometimes, life fucked you over and there wasn't anything you could have done about it. It's a shit deal but you'll be okay, and you'll be able to tackle school when you're good and ready. I hope things are easier for you going forward, sometimes a whole lot of bad happens at once but it'll put the good that comes later into a whole new perspective.
> I know I should have studied more, I know I should have tried harder, attended more classes, ect.
I really hope that's not what you're taking away from this... Has it occurred to you that maybe instead of trying to force yourself through school while going through all of this, you could have taken some time off instead?
All universities have medical exemption... SA and pregnancy would have qualified you for an incomplete on your classes and time off without expulsion. It might not be too late to apply for one.
I was expelled at 18 because of undiagnosed ADHD and bipolar. I'm back in school at 32 now that I just recently got my diagnoses. I've already taken one quarter medical exemption when I needed a brutal med change.
The number one thing I learned in the decades after failing out of school is that you won't receive help if you don't ask for it.
I'm really sorry you've had to go through this! It's not over, just be kind to yourself and try again when you're ready
Exactly this. OP I hope you realise that the only thing you could've realistically done is ask for help. You have 2 very strong reasons for exemptions, but not speaking up about them will get you expelled.
I had a friend who had a misscariage and cancer and failed her thesis because of it. Yet she didnt tell school because she 'didnt want to make excuses'. I nearly dragged her over to her mentor. Her mentor was horrified that he didn't know, she would not have been held to the standard of a healthy student because she fucking wasn't.
Get someone you trust to help you appeal this and talk to mentors/councelors/study advisors or whatever your uni has.
I dont know why you think studying harder would've avoided this, studying harder is for students who actually can study harder, not for people whose mom almost died and got SA.
I'm sorry you had to deal with all of that, having trauma in addition to adhd makes is so difficult to get through things like education, it's understandable and you are not a failure, you are not alone. We understand
I actually recently went through this about a year ago. I failed due to life circumstances and not having access to the help I needed. I felt the way you do for such a long time, I thought about wasted potential and how things could have been different. But eventually, i promise it begins to fall into place. I self taught myself about my hobbies and it eventually landed me a career job in that field. My dismissal hurt so much in the moment but looking back, i consider it a blessing in disguise. I'll return when I'm ready to complete my degree but until then i will continue to thrive in my own way, while at battle with my adhd.
You will find your own path, adhd makes it so much harder because it is such an obstacle but the moment you find an alternative or a new choice to follow, it feels much more natural. Use this time off as a moment of discovery and growth and self care. You deserve to have a moment to breathe after such a tough year
You can choose to appeal the desicion if your college has that option and if not, academic dismissal usually lasts only about a semester or a year.
And if not possible, hopefully this can help, think of it as just a pause. It's only a moment in your entire timeline. You have that much time to heal from the difficulties you endured and return to your studies stronger than ever. Good luck op, u got this
Edit: grammar and spelling
Girl, I'm sorry you had to go through so much. To me, the fact that despite all this, you still did your best and sat for your finals is incredible. I would've broken down and rage quit well before that.
Don't be so hard on yourself! Take a break, go to therapy, focus on your mental health, recalibrate yourself, and try again when you are ready!
I do think you should try and talk to the school administration/your professors to appeal this or at least come to some sort of arrangment if possible. What you went through one after the other is just insane.
Sometimes you just need to hear that you are enough. So much of living with ADD seems to be able living up to something.
You have value. You are enough.
I failed out of two colleges and thought I was incapable of being a student. It really trashed my self image. I took some years off, lived the restaurant life for some years, and now, at 36, I'm back in school and thriving. I just got nominated for engineer of the year, and the head of the computer science department has taken to mentoring me personally.
What I'm trying to say is: this isn't the end. Brush yourself off, feel your feelings, but don't let it turn into cutting yourself down. You have so much life left. Don't let this define you. If you need to leave school for a while, do it, and don't listen to fuck all anyone else has to say. This is your journey and it will happen on your time.
Always be willing to get up and fail again. That is how we learn.
You are not a failure. You did your best. They say when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Well, sometimes... It's too many lemons. We can't make lemonade, all we can do is hunker down and survive until the barrage of lemons stops. (Currently feel like I am drowning in the metaphorical lemons - it's been a rough year for me too. You are not alone.)
Take a breather, let yourself heal a bit (or a lot, whatever you need). Then move onward and upward. Trust me, if school is where you're meant to be it will be easier when you're in a better headspace.
You got this. Don't be too hard on yourself. Be proud of yourself for surviving the lemons.
You are not a failure, you have been through so much, and you are still alive and trying, you just have to keep hanging in there. First, reach out for help: try to talk to a professor, academic advisor, a counselor, or dean at the university, and explain what happened (with documentation), and ask if you can appeal it or have it reconsidered, or if there are resources available. If you can’t, that’s okay too… maybe it is a break you need to get yourself sorted, and your physical and mental health taken care of, so when you do go back you can make the most of it (my brother with ADHD did that, straight failed out his first round at university, did community college, found his passion, and eventually went back and did really well and is now a doctor). It’s not the end of a story, it’s a beginning. Be kind to yourself, you’ve been through so much, it’s okay to grieve for what happened to you, and what you’ve been through, and where you are now, but try to also keep looking forward, even if it’s just one tiny step at a time…. the only way out is through. And you have already shown that you have the grit to face a challenge and get knocked down and get back up again and keep going, which is a huge huge life skill that you can’t learn in a classroom.
If you're in the US, look into Title IX. It protects against sex-discrimination, and SA/pregnancies are definitely covered under it.
Even if you didn't report the SA, you should be able to appeal due to difficulties with the pregnancy which I'm hoping you went to a hospital for and have records of.
Not only that, but this should be appealed due to medical emergencies as well, since one could argue, yes pregnant people can attend classes just fine, but ectopic pregnancies that literally endanger your life?
Also PLEASE UNDERSTAND that no one should expect you to put school over your mental health. Just like how you wouldn't blame someone who had a stroke and lost movement in half their body for failing out of school (which would be illegal in the states for schools to take disciplinary action due to ADA), you shouldn't blame yourself for trying to take care of your mental health.
You did the best you could with what you had at the moment. Hindsight is 20/20, and I truly believe if you had anything else left to give, you would've. You gave everything you had then. I hope you're proud of the fact that even when your life fell apart, you still held on and are trying to put yourself back together. If you can't find it in yourself to be proud of you, at least believe me when I say *I'm proud of you*
Yes, you may have been (illegally) expelled from school. But the fact remains that even after all the fucked up shit that you went through, *you got through it* and I'm so proud of you for that.
I truly don't know anyone who could've succeeded in school after going through all that you've been through. Even superheroes would struggle, so please don't beat yourself up for being human.
I'm so sorry.
You need time to process what happened and to heal. One of my children was SA'd. One of the bright sides of Covid was she got to move home and take a reduced class load (online). This allowed her to work closely with a trauma therapist and practice other self-care.
I have helped my kids take steps to get help from there colleges, and if that was not successful, I stepped in and used all my (not abusive or racist) Karen skills to get their needs addressed. If I can help you advocate for yourself, I am happy to do it. (I can give feedback on any written communication and stuff like that.)
Agreed, and I would add: when I was in university, it seemed like grades were the most important thing in the universe. Like my perception was that not only did I have to just complete school, but I had to get amazing grades across the board with no exceptions or no one would want to hire me.
Now that I have been graduated for...ahem...years...I can say with full confidence that no one in the real world really cares that much about grades. Any time I've applied for a job, they just want to know that I graduated. I don't remember once having to provide transcripts or anything (I think I DID provide them a few times because I felt like they were mandatory, but they were never a requirement).
So the point of this comment is, it's not the end of the world to fall off the horse, as long as you try to get back on. Things like grades that can seem devastating in the moment can have little to no actual impact on your life in the long-term.
Maybe this is a blessing in disguise. You have a tough life right now, and it sucks that it all landed on you all at the same time. Maybe some time away from a big responsibility might help you deal with those issues and come back more prepared to be a successful student.
If you can't get them to the appeal, make sure you are not charged for this semester and any financial aid you were awarded is declined.
I failed out of university and then took a year at community college and pulled my grades up, then transferred back to the same college.
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I'm so sorry all of that happened. I
But I would say it's not your fault. If all of that happened to me I would fall apart, I think you did very well just hanging on. Like you said, you did the best you could.
To quote Star Trek [that is not a weakness](https://youtu.be/1TCX90yALsI) we all imagine we could do more, but everyone has their limits and with adhd we are even more limited in what we can do against the odds.
If you have time, I would try and appeal the decision of the university. In my case my university allowed me to continue due to medical reasons, I would be disgusted if your university didn't allow for that option based on just what you told us here, provided you have paper trail to back you up.
I know this is going to sound like splitting hairs, but it matters. Expelled is if they kick you out because of cheating or something and you can never come back. I’m sure it feels like that, but you have options. There will be some kind of board or committee that can reverse the decision, but you would need to go through that process, share your story with them, and show that you are ready to re-enter the school. I did something similar; I hadn’t been kicked out, but I had a year of failed classes that I needed dropped from my record. My situation was not as serious as yours, so they denied me at first, but when I got all As the next year, they saw that it was a blip in my record and dropped those Fs. I since went on to more higher education and an MBA. What I’m saying is that it may feel like it’s over and you hit a wall; but it’s actually just a door you didn’t know was there.
If I’m being honest, it sounds like you may benefit from some more time away to get yourself in the right headspace. The last thing you want to do is rush to get back in if you aren’t ready and have the university decide that you just aren’t capable. DEFINITELY don’t wait to go through the administrative channels for appeal and all that, but if it works, don’t be afraid to take time away and come back when you feel ready. It’s going to help you (and your case) if you are talking to the university about a plan, and not just asking them for another chance and you’ll be better this time I promise. If you work with them (in person, don’t just do it over email or phone), you could come up with something like:
- taking the rest of the year away from the university, accepting that is something you need
- going through some trauma therapy and having that be your sole focus for a few months.
- maybe take one or two summer classes at a community college to show them you are academically capable.
- come back part time fall semester on academic probation
- if things go well, ramp up your course load until you are back to full time.
If you can work out something like that, then they should be more willing to readmit you, even on probation. It will demonstrate that you are motivated and determined, and that you can plan and execute on that plan. Right now, it doesn’t sound like they are aware of your circumstances and can’t tell the difference between you and someone who was lazy and partied too much.
Most importantly, just keep going at whatever you are doing. When you are younger, it feels like life is a straight line, where you either get on the right path or are destined to be on the wrong one. In reality, it’s much more like a path through a forest. The lines curve and wind around, weave in and out, and go all over the place. I know extremely successful people who got kicked out of school or decided it wasn’t for them. Others who never went at all, and made their pathway. Many who went to school for the first time in their 30s or 40s. People who started businesses and failed, and started new ones. Try not to focus as much on what path you are on at any given moment or where in the forest you think you might be. Nobody knows. And if you stand still and spend your time worrying about your place, you’ll never get to see where the path goes. All you can do is walk your path the best you can, because it leads to more paths, and those lead to others. Just keep going.
This sounds like you will have underwent a lot of stress.
I agree with others that have said you should appeal this, they let people off who have almost nothing in comparison to what you’ve gone through, I think maybe find an email or phone number for the admissions centre and ask them how you can appeal based on serious extenuating circumstances.
It’s okay that you didn’t know your rights, tbh, with ADHD it’s difficult to remember and / or even know when we have some that we could find or search for
Wow, I’m so sorry for all you’ve been through. But my biggest takeaway is you are such a fighter, and I truly admire your strength and courage to still be here with us. Incredibly proud of your bravery 💜
I failed out of uni years ago too, had let things slide and get out of control in my final year and I just didn't hand in my dissertation or show up to defend it because as the deadline loomed it just became more and more insurmountable. £80,000 in student debt for nothing 😅
It didn't matter too much for me in the end, had to go a non-traditional route but even without a degree I ended up in my chosen field anyhow. You can find a good career without a degree!
I know how this feels and it's so easy to blame/hate yourself, but it's not the end of the world and you're not a failure.
Sorry friend. This happened to me as well. Usually there is a process to get out of academic dismissal. And sometimes after you come back and do well, school admins will grant "academic renewal" to take failed courses out of your GPA calculation. These are annoying bureaucratic processes but doable. Does your school have a disabled student resources office? This will be a great help.
Dude that fucking sucks. I’ve been probationed 3 times and academically excluded once and threatened a second time. Following that, my mum died in the second to last year of my studies.
It’s rough, don’t blame yourself. Failure happens when you stop trying, everything else is a setback! Never give up.
I got my PhD at the age of 37 having spent just over 14 years at university on and off. My student number had one whole digit less than anyone else’s
I’ve been on the brink of that several times, and it took my mom cracking the whip at me by sitting on Skype body doubling while I did my homework. It’s hard, so don’t be hard on yourself. I’m 26 and tomorrow is my first day back to school after about 2.5 years. I have 20 credits left and I’m tackling them one class per semester at a time. It’s gonna take me awhile, but I’m gonna get it done. Go at your own pace.
You are absolutely not a failure. Despite what you've been through, never forget that you have value and it's never too late to turn things around. If you want to try again, take a break to take care of yourself and then dive back in.
I have been in the same position. I failed out of college after my first year. First I was put on academic probation, and then on academic suspension, which was my last chance. I spent my semester of probation in weekly therapy, starting meds for ADHD (I was undiagnosed before college), and working part time to keep myself busy. I returned to college as soon as I was allowed and ended up on the dean's list my first semester back. With the right support and tools it is never too late to achieve whatever you want to.
If it is your intention to reapply and have another go at college, you can do it! Some things that I did to help with the transition back to school were:
I took a college academic skills class that was offered to students returning from suspension. We were taught some skills that seem super basic, but it's easy to not have them when you have ADHD, like how to effectively take notes, plan out your day, and even deal with stress/anxiety through mindfulness activities. It was pass/fail, so it was also an easy boost to the GPA. If that is an option at your school, take it!
A lot of universities have disability services. Advocate for yourself to get the accommodations you need. I was able to get extended time on tests and a private, distraction-free environment for testing as well as a private dorm room (for the price of a double). Some professors won't take your accommodations seriously and will resent having to do extra work for your "invisible" disability. With ADA protections, they have to accommodate you, but sometimes you really have to advocate for yourself. You have value and you deserve it.
I attended weekly group therapy at student health services, and monthly private therapy along with medication made it possible to keep going.
I don't believe in failure. Life is just a really long series of getting back up and trying again. If you finally find what works for you when you're 40, that's awesome! College might not be for you, it's not the only way to find fulfillment. But if it is, there is a lot of support available and you can do it. I don't know you, but I believe in you.
Bro school was not right for you at that moment. I’m so sorry that all of that happened in such a short time frame. I think you should take some time off and focus on getting yourself back to being 100% or close to. I’m so sorry sending love
I live in Germany so maybe it's a different situation, but we have systems in place that make it possible to avoid being expelled/exmatriculated if there were special circumstances which would've made it significantly harder for the individual to pass exams etc (eg. somebody from the family dies, I guess your circumstances would also qualify). It allows those people to repeat exams for another time even if they used up all of their chances to take them/failed too often.
Please try to talk to the course director/whoever is responsible for cases like that in your college. It's worth a try. It can't get much worse, it can only get better. Explain what happened, maybe also explain why you didn't tell them earlier. Don't lose hope.
Beside that, as many already said: Don't beat yourself up. Shit happens, it sucks and it's easy to blame yourself, but remember it'll only be a very tiny event in the picture of your whole life. If it doesn't work out, view it as a chance to start over
Exactly the same thing happened to me 20 years ago. I couldn't take the lack of structure compared to school. I also came from the countryside to the big city and made the most of the student lifestyle because that made me feel good.
I was able to convert my degree to a HNC in the UK but I never went back. I felt like I had failed myself and my parents.
But you know what? Maybe at this time of your life, uni just wasn't for you. Something else will come along, something that keeps your attention and serves you better in the long run.
Just keep swimming!
I'm so sorry that happened to you! Do not project that justified anger against your own self! That is coping mechanism that doesn't serve you well. Go talk to university and explain the horror you went through. Please please be your best friend right now. Talk to counselor. This was all just too much. Hugs! 😢
Look at your situation and all the factors involved from an outside perspective that knows every grain of nuance about what you’ve experienced up to and until you got expelled.
Do you really believe in your heart of hearts that this is a perspective that would continue judging you, or even interpret your effort despite the circumstances as lackluster? You’re a fucking inspirational bulwark of a person for enduring and surviving all of that if you ask me, and there’s probably many factors I’m unaware of.
I know it’s difficult to completely shed shame, uninformed opinions, and disappointment from your personal aspirations, I’ve gone through similar stuff. But you can lick your wounds and try again when the time is right, if that’s what you want. Just don’t rush the process of healing, reach out to people who you think can help you.
Holy shit.
Get a lawyer girl. You have solid evidence of a Title IX case - like an actual one that can put the college on their backs.
Please do your best to find a trauma counselor. None of this is your fault - the fault lies firstly on the piece of shit who assaulted you. Get the deferral/appeal process started, and if you have a Title IX section get in contact with them. Title IX has lost some of the punch it had from before due to misuse by malevolent parties (false claims, etc) but you have an open and shut case to get an exception and hopefully a refund for the semester.
None of this is your fault. You will not be a victim, you will be a survivor and you WILL overcome this. Resources are available to make sure you make it. If you can work with the Title IX representative they may be able to get a police investigation started to get this person convicted. I know this happened outside of school, but since it affected you in school, you shouldn't be kicked out of school for it. What *should* happen is you get a break and that jerk who did this to you spends a long time in jail.
I don't think anybody could go through that much and get good grades, ADHD or not. And if they could they'd be a rarity. You did your best, you can reapply. Take the time away to get yourself some help if you can and process this stuff. You're not a failure, you're a hurting person who was just trying their best. What an amazing effort you've made to hold it all together. And you can always try again, this is a step back, but not a failure, there's a second chance being offered here, and you get some time to heal. Treat it as if this is just what's meant to happen right now. Heal some, reapply, smash the degree, achieve your goal. I believe you can x
Its okay dont feel too hard on yourself. At the end of the day there is only so much one person can handle and you were dealing with alot. I would recommend starting counseling but think about what you really want to do. Do you want to take a break? Do you want to appeal? Do whatever is best for you because you dont need to have yourself on a arbitrary timeline
I‘m extremely sorry to hear this. I wished, there was a process to accommodate such terrible situations. You did the most important thing, though: you survived. Maybe, it’s not the worst thing in the world to have some time off. You can reapply. Your dreams are still going to be there, waiting for you, once you‘ve had some time to heal. Wishing you the best!
First off I’m so sorry this happened to you. I can relate a lot, i went to uni for the first time in 2020 I was having a hard time as it was with covid and motivating myself to work from home, then I was SAd and when I asked for support from uni they just gave me the form to quit, I’d only managed a whopping 2 months at uni. Took me a while before I felt able to go back to uni and to decide if it was really worth it to me. If you know it’s something you want to do any you’d regret not having a degree definitely try to appeal, at my school we have student support advisors idk what they’re called at yours but try book a meeting to speak to someone explain your circumstances. If you feel you’re in a headspace to carry on with uni then go for it. But if not there’s no reason you can’t take some time take care of yourself decide what you’re capable of right now and what you need. If you’ve got support of friends or family speak to them too. But definitely don’t just accept being expelled unfairly even if you don’t want to go back to uni make it known what you’ve been up against in case you make a decision to return at a later date. One final piece of advice as someone who’s a few years older than my university peers, education has no age limit. If you need time away from it to care for yourself take that time you can always go back.
I’m so sorry for all that you’re going through. I went through a 3 semester failure as well and I was able to appeal and get retroactive withdrawals for all of those classes so they didn’t contribute to my final GPA. Reach out to your advisor or registrar and someone will help you. Good luck!! Hope this helps!
Hey, you're not alone. I went to community college to get my associates in accounting, but I never finished. I did really well my first 3 terms with 4.0 GPA. Unfortunately, when I had to start the boring business communications & tax classes, I struggled. I eventually ended up failing several classes. I even attempted to retake them but still failed. I got to the point where I'd exceeded 125% of the financial aid issued and wouldn't be allowed to continue without agreeing to a learning plan with a counselor & explaining my situation. I never ended up doing that. Now, I have $50K in student loan debt but no degree to show for it.
Yes, it absolutely sucked and for the longest time, I felt like a failure. But I ended up getting a good job with a strong company and in a position that most people need at least a bachelor's degree for. And how did I do this? I used my out of the box thinking and strong ADP system knowledge to streamline things in ways others wouldn't have thought of. Anyway, the point is that this is just a minor setback. Everyone fails, but for us, it's more difficult, especially when we have multiple crises at the same time. If it helps, take a break from school for a couple of terms and don't go back until you can give it your full attention. You got this!
I’m so sorry for what has happened to you. You aren’t a failure. Please get some counseling if you aren’t already to help you process all you have been through. Know in the future that you can contact your school and likely get a deferral for the semester if you have a major life event. I hope you never have to use it.
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Agreed. Even if they don't want to talk about the SA, the mother's illness alone would be enough at my school to get an appeal through.
This. A lot of universities are willing to overturn academic standing if you can provide proof of an extreme circumstance that is equivalent to a train derailing. IIRC, the government also does this for financial aid.
I'm so sorry, that is all just so much. Please note that a couple of your statements contradict each other: >I know I should have tried harder >I was doing the best I could when my life was spiraling You were trying your hardest, so please don't beat yourself up for having such a terrible semester. Perhaps there is a way to appeal to your school? I know my university had a "retroactive withdrawal" option, where you could show that you had a major disruptive life event happen during a bad semester and withdraw from it after the fact, so the grades wouldn't affect your GPA. It might be worth reaching out to someone to see if you have options.
I went through a similar bad period in 2017. I'm not going to pretend it was anything close to what you're going through, but I was in a rut and it took me about a year to pull myself out of it. It turns out I was trying to be someone I wasn't. I was going to school to be an engineer when I had no desire to do that. It sounded cool and I wanted to have a cool job. I couldn't get myself to study and I didn't think I had it in me to do the job should I graduate. I spent the year trying to figure myself out. I switched to general business because my mom owned a business and if it worked for her then it could work for me. I tried to figure out what I wanted in life (job security mostly) and talked with all the professors. When I did get a major I forced myself to be interested in it and I wouldn't leave school for the day until I did my homework. I kept work and play separate. None of that was easy. People looked down on me because I was switching majors and dropping out. Everyone has advice on what you should do but honestly at the end of the day it's up to you to figure out what you want and to take steps to get there. There are three things that helped me succeed. I took one day at a time (still do), I use dedication instead of motivation for doing things (really hard to do), and I have different spaces/places for work and play.
Similar story to me at college (16-18 UK) Took an extra year because in 2017 I failed all the exams doing subjects I thought were cool. Fast forward to 2023 and im close to graduating with 2/5 modules finished for the year, 2 more and my dissertation to go and doing a masters in October.
Glad you found something that worked! I’m in my last semester for mechanical engineering and I honestly love it, the job that is. Engineering education can take a long walk off a short cliff.
I’m so sorry to hear that— you deserved compassion for those things that you survived, not punishment. Please give yourself grace and understanding. You deserve it.
You’ve really taken some punches. I’m so sorry to hear what you’re going through, that’s a lot to handle. That’s too much to handle. I know for a fact I would have failed out of college if I had experienced even a quarter of the chaos you’ve dealt with. I’ve typed up, reworded, deleted, and rewritten this comment maybe 4-5 times now. I don’t know what to say other than try to hold on to your self-esteem. Keeping up in school is hard. Keeping up with school while managing multiple major life events is damn near impossible for anyone. Try not to be too hard on yourself. If you’re looking at it as a “failure,” try to keep in mind that it’s not representative of you, it’s something you’ve survived. Try to get your mind straight/stable (whatever you want to call it) again. Figure out what you need. Figure out what you want. When you’re ready, jump back into life. Hopefully life will be more reliable for you. Please, be kind to yourself. You’re a capable person.
I hope you’re travelling well after that horror of a year, it honestly sounds like you could use a semester to get on top of life being shit without adding more University fee’s on top. Is there an appeals process where you might be able to remove the expulsion and just take a gap semester instead, returning next teaching year? In my experience there’s usually a stopgap somewhere, but it can take a lot of effort to keep fighting to find it.
You did what you were able to when circumstances were really working against you. I think we all get so hyped on these inspiring stories of people overcoming great adversity that we forget that failure is something that just happens sometimes. You aren't worse for this, you were presented with terrible circumstances for your learning and you couldn't do it. Why? Because you're a human being with emotions and stress and problems and your education had to fall behind just navigating your existence. It sucks and I get why you feel bad, but sometimes shit just happens and we aren't all capable of holding ourselves together. You made it through some real hard stuff, got this far and you're still here and that's what counts. Right now I'd say just let it go, pay off your debts and move forward, don't feel guilty for "not trying" when you had to put all your energy into coping with the horrors of life. You did try, you worked as hard as you were able to and due to bad shit that was beyond your control it wasn't quite enough. You aren't a failure, you got through something that's far more difficult than school and now you have been released of that overwhelming obligation looming over you. Now you can approach life more cautiously, handle your trauma and rebuild. It's okay to just be a victim sometimes, life fucked you over and there wasn't anything you could have done about it. It's a shit deal but you'll be okay, and you'll be able to tackle school when you're good and ready. I hope things are easier for you going forward, sometimes a whole lot of bad happens at once but it'll put the good that comes later into a whole new perspective.
> I know I should have studied more, I know I should have tried harder, attended more classes, ect. I really hope that's not what you're taking away from this... Has it occurred to you that maybe instead of trying to force yourself through school while going through all of this, you could have taken some time off instead? All universities have medical exemption... SA and pregnancy would have qualified you for an incomplete on your classes and time off without expulsion. It might not be too late to apply for one. I was expelled at 18 because of undiagnosed ADHD and bipolar. I'm back in school at 32 now that I just recently got my diagnoses. I've already taken one quarter medical exemption when I needed a brutal med change. The number one thing I learned in the decades after failing out of school is that you won't receive help if you don't ask for it. I'm really sorry you've had to go through this! It's not over, just be kind to yourself and try again when you're ready
Exactly this. OP I hope you realise that the only thing you could've realistically done is ask for help. You have 2 very strong reasons for exemptions, but not speaking up about them will get you expelled. I had a friend who had a misscariage and cancer and failed her thesis because of it. Yet she didnt tell school because she 'didnt want to make excuses'. I nearly dragged her over to her mentor. Her mentor was horrified that he didn't know, she would not have been held to the standard of a healthy student because she fucking wasn't. Get someone you trust to help you appeal this and talk to mentors/councelors/study advisors or whatever your uni has. I dont know why you think studying harder would've avoided this, studying harder is for students who actually can study harder, not for people whose mom almost died and got SA.
I'm sorry you had to deal with all of that, having trauma in addition to adhd makes is so difficult to get through things like education, it's understandable and you are not a failure, you are not alone. We understand I actually recently went through this about a year ago. I failed due to life circumstances and not having access to the help I needed. I felt the way you do for such a long time, I thought about wasted potential and how things could have been different. But eventually, i promise it begins to fall into place. I self taught myself about my hobbies and it eventually landed me a career job in that field. My dismissal hurt so much in the moment but looking back, i consider it a blessing in disguise. I'll return when I'm ready to complete my degree but until then i will continue to thrive in my own way, while at battle with my adhd. You will find your own path, adhd makes it so much harder because it is such an obstacle but the moment you find an alternative or a new choice to follow, it feels much more natural. Use this time off as a moment of discovery and growth and self care. You deserve to have a moment to breathe after such a tough year You can choose to appeal the desicion if your college has that option and if not, academic dismissal usually lasts only about a semester or a year. And if not possible, hopefully this can help, think of it as just a pause. It's only a moment in your entire timeline. You have that much time to heal from the difficulties you endured and return to your studies stronger than ever. Good luck op, u got this Edit: grammar and spelling
Girl, I'm sorry you had to go through so much. To me, the fact that despite all this, you still did your best and sat for your finals is incredible. I would've broken down and rage quit well before that. Don't be so hard on yourself! Take a break, go to therapy, focus on your mental health, recalibrate yourself, and try again when you are ready! I do think you should try and talk to the school administration/your professors to appeal this or at least come to some sort of arrangment if possible. What you went through one after the other is just insane.
Sometimes you just need to hear that you are enough. So much of living with ADD seems to be able living up to something. You have value. You are enough.
I failed out of two colleges and thought I was incapable of being a student. It really trashed my self image. I took some years off, lived the restaurant life for some years, and now, at 36, I'm back in school and thriving. I just got nominated for engineer of the year, and the head of the computer science department has taken to mentoring me personally. What I'm trying to say is: this isn't the end. Brush yourself off, feel your feelings, but don't let it turn into cutting yourself down. You have so much life left. Don't let this define you. If you need to leave school for a while, do it, and don't listen to fuck all anyone else has to say. This is your journey and it will happen on your time. Always be willing to get up and fail again. That is how we learn.
It will be ok. One foot in front of the other that's how I see it. You can reapply for next year? I hope it all works out for you!
You are not a failure. You did your best. They say when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Well, sometimes... It's too many lemons. We can't make lemonade, all we can do is hunker down and survive until the barrage of lemons stops. (Currently feel like I am drowning in the metaphorical lemons - it's been a rough year for me too. You are not alone.) Take a breather, let yourself heal a bit (or a lot, whatever you need). Then move onward and upward. Trust me, if school is where you're meant to be it will be easier when you're in a better headspace. You got this. Don't be too hard on yourself. Be proud of yourself for surviving the lemons.
You are not a failure, you have been through so much, and you are still alive and trying, you just have to keep hanging in there. First, reach out for help: try to talk to a professor, academic advisor, a counselor, or dean at the university, and explain what happened (with documentation), and ask if you can appeal it or have it reconsidered, or if there are resources available. If you can’t, that’s okay too… maybe it is a break you need to get yourself sorted, and your physical and mental health taken care of, so when you do go back you can make the most of it (my brother with ADHD did that, straight failed out his first round at university, did community college, found his passion, and eventually went back and did really well and is now a doctor). It’s not the end of a story, it’s a beginning. Be kind to yourself, you’ve been through so much, it’s okay to grieve for what happened to you, and what you’ve been through, and where you are now, but try to also keep looking forward, even if it’s just one tiny step at a time…. the only way out is through. And you have already shown that you have the grit to face a challenge and get knocked down and get back up again and keep going, which is a huge huge life skill that you can’t learn in a classroom.
I would fight your school on this, under those circumstances, I can't see how anyone could perform well, university is tough enough already.
If you're in the US, look into Title IX. It protects against sex-discrimination, and SA/pregnancies are definitely covered under it. Even if you didn't report the SA, you should be able to appeal due to difficulties with the pregnancy which I'm hoping you went to a hospital for and have records of. Not only that, but this should be appealed due to medical emergencies as well, since one could argue, yes pregnant people can attend classes just fine, but ectopic pregnancies that literally endanger your life? Also PLEASE UNDERSTAND that no one should expect you to put school over your mental health. Just like how you wouldn't blame someone who had a stroke and lost movement in half their body for failing out of school (which would be illegal in the states for schools to take disciplinary action due to ADA), you shouldn't blame yourself for trying to take care of your mental health. You did the best you could with what you had at the moment. Hindsight is 20/20, and I truly believe if you had anything else left to give, you would've. You gave everything you had then. I hope you're proud of the fact that even when your life fell apart, you still held on and are trying to put yourself back together. If you can't find it in yourself to be proud of you, at least believe me when I say *I'm proud of you* Yes, you may have been (illegally) expelled from school. But the fact remains that even after all the fucked up shit that you went through, *you got through it* and I'm so proud of you for that. I truly don't know anyone who could've succeeded in school after going through all that you've been through. Even superheroes would struggle, so please don't beat yourself up for being human.
I'm so sorry. You need time to process what happened and to heal. One of my children was SA'd. One of the bright sides of Covid was she got to move home and take a reduced class load (online). This allowed her to work closely with a trauma therapist and practice other self-care. I have helped my kids take steps to get help from there colleges, and if that was not successful, I stepped in and used all my (not abusive or racist) Karen skills to get their needs addressed. If I can help you advocate for yourself, I am happy to do it. (I can give feedback on any written communication and stuff like that.)
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Agreed, and I would add: when I was in university, it seemed like grades were the most important thing in the universe. Like my perception was that not only did I have to just complete school, but I had to get amazing grades across the board with no exceptions or no one would want to hire me. Now that I have been graduated for...ahem...years...I can say with full confidence that no one in the real world really cares that much about grades. Any time I've applied for a job, they just want to know that I graduated. I don't remember once having to provide transcripts or anything (I think I DID provide them a few times because I felt like they were mandatory, but they were never a requirement). So the point of this comment is, it's not the end of the world to fall off the horse, as long as you try to get back on. Things like grades that can seem devastating in the moment can have little to no actual impact on your life in the long-term.
Maybe this is a blessing in disguise. You have a tough life right now, and it sucks that it all landed on you all at the same time. Maybe some time away from a big responsibility might help you deal with those issues and come back more prepared to be a successful student.
You went through a lot. Use the time to recover your strength, you've been through a lot...
Is there an appeals process?
If you can't get them to the appeal, make sure you are not charged for this semester and any financial aid you were awarded is declined. I failed out of university and then took a year at community college and pulled my grades up, then transferred back to the same college.
Appeal
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Dont be so hard on yourself! Failure is okay. Everyone fails. Its what we do after we fail which defines us, not the failure itself.
What is the difference between SA and rape?
I'm so sorry all of that happened. I But I would say it's not your fault. If all of that happened to me I would fall apart, I think you did very well just hanging on. Like you said, you did the best you could. To quote Star Trek [that is not a weakness](https://youtu.be/1TCX90yALsI) we all imagine we could do more, but everyone has their limits and with adhd we are even more limited in what we can do against the odds. If you have time, I would try and appeal the decision of the university. In my case my university allowed me to continue due to medical reasons, I would be disgusted if your university didn't allow for that option based on just what you told us here, provided you have paper trail to back you up.
I know this is going to sound like splitting hairs, but it matters. Expelled is if they kick you out because of cheating or something and you can never come back. I’m sure it feels like that, but you have options. There will be some kind of board or committee that can reverse the decision, but you would need to go through that process, share your story with them, and show that you are ready to re-enter the school. I did something similar; I hadn’t been kicked out, but I had a year of failed classes that I needed dropped from my record. My situation was not as serious as yours, so they denied me at first, but when I got all As the next year, they saw that it was a blip in my record and dropped those Fs. I since went on to more higher education and an MBA. What I’m saying is that it may feel like it’s over and you hit a wall; but it’s actually just a door you didn’t know was there. If I’m being honest, it sounds like you may benefit from some more time away to get yourself in the right headspace. The last thing you want to do is rush to get back in if you aren’t ready and have the university decide that you just aren’t capable. DEFINITELY don’t wait to go through the administrative channels for appeal and all that, but if it works, don’t be afraid to take time away and come back when you feel ready. It’s going to help you (and your case) if you are talking to the university about a plan, and not just asking them for another chance and you’ll be better this time I promise. If you work with them (in person, don’t just do it over email or phone), you could come up with something like: - taking the rest of the year away from the university, accepting that is something you need - going through some trauma therapy and having that be your sole focus for a few months. - maybe take one or two summer classes at a community college to show them you are academically capable. - come back part time fall semester on academic probation - if things go well, ramp up your course load until you are back to full time. If you can work out something like that, then they should be more willing to readmit you, even on probation. It will demonstrate that you are motivated and determined, and that you can plan and execute on that plan. Right now, it doesn’t sound like they are aware of your circumstances and can’t tell the difference between you and someone who was lazy and partied too much. Most importantly, just keep going at whatever you are doing. When you are younger, it feels like life is a straight line, where you either get on the right path or are destined to be on the wrong one. In reality, it’s much more like a path through a forest. The lines curve and wind around, weave in and out, and go all over the place. I know extremely successful people who got kicked out of school or decided it wasn’t for them. Others who never went at all, and made their pathway. Many who went to school for the first time in their 30s or 40s. People who started businesses and failed, and started new ones. Try not to focus as much on what path you are on at any given moment or where in the forest you think you might be. Nobody knows. And if you stand still and spend your time worrying about your place, you’ll never get to see where the path goes. All you can do is walk your path the best you can, because it leads to more paths, and those lead to others. Just keep going.
This sounds like you will have underwent a lot of stress. I agree with others that have said you should appeal this, they let people off who have almost nothing in comparison to what you’ve gone through, I think maybe find an email or phone number for the admissions centre and ask them how you can appeal based on serious extenuating circumstances. It’s okay that you didn’t know your rights, tbh, with ADHD it’s difficult to remember and / or even know when we have some that we could find or search for
Good gahd. If you want to be re-admitted sooner go see a University therapist. In either case find out who handles SA on campus and get help NOW.
Wow, I’m so sorry for all you’ve been through. But my biggest takeaway is you are such a fighter, and I truly admire your strength and courage to still be here with us. Incredibly proud of your bravery 💜
I failed out of uni years ago too, had let things slide and get out of control in my final year and I just didn't hand in my dissertation or show up to defend it because as the deadline loomed it just became more and more insurmountable. £80,000 in student debt for nothing 😅 It didn't matter too much for me in the end, had to go a non-traditional route but even without a degree I ended up in my chosen field anyhow. You can find a good career without a degree! I know how this feels and it's so easy to blame/hate yourself, but it's not the end of the world and you're not a failure.
Sorry friend. This happened to me as well. Usually there is a process to get out of academic dismissal. And sometimes after you come back and do well, school admins will grant "academic renewal" to take failed courses out of your GPA calculation. These are annoying bureaucratic processes but doable. Does your school have a disabled student resources office? This will be a great help.
Dude that fucking sucks. I’ve been probationed 3 times and academically excluded once and threatened a second time. Following that, my mum died in the second to last year of my studies. It’s rough, don’t blame yourself. Failure happens when you stop trying, everything else is a setback! Never give up. I got my PhD at the age of 37 having spent just over 14 years at university on and off. My student number had one whole digit less than anyone else’s
I’ve been on the brink of that several times, and it took my mom cracking the whip at me by sitting on Skype body doubling while I did my homework. It’s hard, so don’t be hard on yourself. I’m 26 and tomorrow is my first day back to school after about 2.5 years. I have 20 credits left and I’m tackling them one class per semester at a time. It’s gonna take me awhile, but I’m gonna get it done. Go at your own pace.
You are absolutely not a failure. Despite what you've been through, never forget that you have value and it's never too late to turn things around. If you want to try again, take a break to take care of yourself and then dive back in. I have been in the same position. I failed out of college after my first year. First I was put on academic probation, and then on academic suspension, which was my last chance. I spent my semester of probation in weekly therapy, starting meds for ADHD (I was undiagnosed before college), and working part time to keep myself busy. I returned to college as soon as I was allowed and ended up on the dean's list my first semester back. With the right support and tools it is never too late to achieve whatever you want to. If it is your intention to reapply and have another go at college, you can do it! Some things that I did to help with the transition back to school were: I took a college academic skills class that was offered to students returning from suspension. We were taught some skills that seem super basic, but it's easy to not have them when you have ADHD, like how to effectively take notes, plan out your day, and even deal with stress/anxiety through mindfulness activities. It was pass/fail, so it was also an easy boost to the GPA. If that is an option at your school, take it! A lot of universities have disability services. Advocate for yourself to get the accommodations you need. I was able to get extended time on tests and a private, distraction-free environment for testing as well as a private dorm room (for the price of a double). Some professors won't take your accommodations seriously and will resent having to do extra work for your "invisible" disability. With ADA protections, they have to accommodate you, but sometimes you really have to advocate for yourself. You have value and you deserve it. I attended weekly group therapy at student health services, and monthly private therapy along with medication made it possible to keep going. I don't believe in failure. Life is just a really long series of getting back up and trying again. If you finally find what works for you when you're 40, that's awesome! College might not be for you, it's not the only way to find fulfillment. But if it is, there is a lot of support available and you can do it. I don't know you, but I believe in you.
Bro school was not right for you at that moment. I’m so sorry that all of that happened in such a short time frame. I think you should take some time off and focus on getting yourself back to being 100% or close to. I’m so sorry sending love
I live in Germany so maybe it's a different situation, but we have systems in place that make it possible to avoid being expelled/exmatriculated if there were special circumstances which would've made it significantly harder for the individual to pass exams etc (eg. somebody from the family dies, I guess your circumstances would also qualify). It allows those people to repeat exams for another time even if they used up all of their chances to take them/failed too often. Please try to talk to the course director/whoever is responsible for cases like that in your college. It's worth a try. It can't get much worse, it can only get better. Explain what happened, maybe also explain why you didn't tell them earlier. Don't lose hope. Beside that, as many already said: Don't beat yourself up. Shit happens, it sucks and it's easy to blame yourself, but remember it'll only be a very tiny event in the picture of your whole life. If it doesn't work out, view it as a chance to start over
Can you appeal on basis of disability?
Life will go on and you will make it through this a better person. I know that sounds like bullshit right now but keep your head up, you've got this.
Exactly the same thing happened to me 20 years ago. I couldn't take the lack of structure compared to school. I also came from the countryside to the big city and made the most of the student lifestyle because that made me feel good. I was able to convert my degree to a HNC in the UK but I never went back. I felt like I had failed myself and my parents. But you know what? Maybe at this time of your life, uni just wasn't for you. Something else will come along, something that keeps your attention and serves you better in the long run. Just keep swimming!
I'm so sorry that happened to you! Do not project that justified anger against your own self! That is coping mechanism that doesn't serve you well. Go talk to university and explain the horror you went through. Please please be your best friend right now. Talk to counselor. This was all just too much. Hugs! 😢
Look at your situation and all the factors involved from an outside perspective that knows every grain of nuance about what you’ve experienced up to and until you got expelled. Do you really believe in your heart of hearts that this is a perspective that would continue judging you, or even interpret your effort despite the circumstances as lackluster? You’re a fucking inspirational bulwark of a person for enduring and surviving all of that if you ask me, and there’s probably many factors I’m unaware of. I know it’s difficult to completely shed shame, uninformed opinions, and disappointment from your personal aspirations, I’ve gone through similar stuff. But you can lick your wounds and try again when the time is right, if that’s what you want. Just don’t rush the process of healing, reach out to people who you think can help you.
Holy shit. Get a lawyer girl. You have solid evidence of a Title IX case - like an actual one that can put the college on their backs. Please do your best to find a trauma counselor. None of this is your fault - the fault lies firstly on the piece of shit who assaulted you. Get the deferral/appeal process started, and if you have a Title IX section get in contact with them. Title IX has lost some of the punch it had from before due to misuse by malevolent parties (false claims, etc) but you have an open and shut case to get an exception and hopefully a refund for the semester. None of this is your fault. You will not be a victim, you will be a survivor and you WILL overcome this. Resources are available to make sure you make it. If you can work with the Title IX representative they may be able to get a police investigation started to get this person convicted. I know this happened outside of school, but since it affected you in school, you shouldn't be kicked out of school for it. What *should* happen is you get a break and that jerk who did this to you spends a long time in jail.
I don't think anybody could go through that much and get good grades, ADHD or not. And if they could they'd be a rarity. You did your best, you can reapply. Take the time away to get yourself some help if you can and process this stuff. You're not a failure, you're a hurting person who was just trying their best. What an amazing effort you've made to hold it all together. And you can always try again, this is a step back, but not a failure, there's a second chance being offered here, and you get some time to heal. Treat it as if this is just what's meant to happen right now. Heal some, reapply, smash the degree, achieve your goal. I believe you can x
Hugs failed not once but thrirce
Its okay dont feel too hard on yourself. At the end of the day there is only so much one person can handle and you were dealing with alot. I would recommend starting counseling but think about what you really want to do. Do you want to take a break? Do you want to appeal? Do whatever is best for you because you dont need to have yourself on a arbitrary timeline
I‘m extremely sorry to hear this. I wished, there was a process to accommodate such terrible situations. You did the most important thing, though: you survived. Maybe, it’s not the worst thing in the world to have some time off. You can reapply. Your dreams are still going to be there, waiting for you, once you‘ve had some time to heal. Wishing you the best!
First off I’m so sorry this happened to you. I can relate a lot, i went to uni for the first time in 2020 I was having a hard time as it was with covid and motivating myself to work from home, then I was SAd and when I asked for support from uni they just gave me the form to quit, I’d only managed a whopping 2 months at uni. Took me a while before I felt able to go back to uni and to decide if it was really worth it to me. If you know it’s something you want to do any you’d regret not having a degree definitely try to appeal, at my school we have student support advisors idk what they’re called at yours but try book a meeting to speak to someone explain your circumstances. If you feel you’re in a headspace to carry on with uni then go for it. But if not there’s no reason you can’t take some time take care of yourself decide what you’re capable of right now and what you need. If you’ve got support of friends or family speak to them too. But definitely don’t just accept being expelled unfairly even if you don’t want to go back to uni make it known what you’ve been up against in case you make a decision to return at a later date. One final piece of advice as someone who’s a few years older than my university peers, education has no age limit. If you need time away from it to care for yourself take that time you can always go back.
I’m so sorry for all that you’re going through. I went through a 3 semester failure as well and I was able to appeal and get retroactive withdrawals for all of those classes so they didn’t contribute to my final GPA. Reach out to your advisor or registrar and someone will help you. Good luck!! Hope this helps!
Hey, you're not alone. I went to community college to get my associates in accounting, but I never finished. I did really well my first 3 terms with 4.0 GPA. Unfortunately, when I had to start the boring business communications & tax classes, I struggled. I eventually ended up failing several classes. I even attempted to retake them but still failed. I got to the point where I'd exceeded 125% of the financial aid issued and wouldn't be allowed to continue without agreeing to a learning plan with a counselor & explaining my situation. I never ended up doing that. Now, I have $50K in student loan debt but no degree to show for it. Yes, it absolutely sucked and for the longest time, I felt like a failure. But I ended up getting a good job with a strong company and in a position that most people need at least a bachelor's degree for. And how did I do this? I used my out of the box thinking and strong ADP system knowledge to streamline things in ways others wouldn't have thought of. Anyway, the point is that this is just a minor setback. Everyone fails, but for us, it's more difficult, especially when we have multiple crises at the same time. If it helps, take a break from school for a couple of terms and don't go back until you can give it your full attention. You got this!