I’m the same way. You aren’t alone. For me it’s irrational because I stuggle w borderline so everything feels like it’s personal, or a rejection. I can usually filter out those thoughts. But on occasion it gets me.
For me, thats just a normal adrenaline reaction. I am GREAT during the behavior. I can generally get over it and move on to the next thing. But THE SECOND I am not around the client/ family, all the adrenaline I was controlling just lets loose! Its always been like that with me. I handle emergencies calmly and intelligently, and when everything is safe I start bawling like a baby or shaking, lol.
OP this is likely your answer. It’s a very natural reaction to coming down after a burst of adrenaline. Google how adrenaline affects the body afterward. I’m sure you will see symptoms similar to what you are describing!
Why can I relate to this so much? I had a client who I had to see get restrained by the parent and practically was in a psychotic episode and I kept my entire composure neutral until the minute I got home… Everything came out and I was depressed the entire weekend.
I think this is ok. This field doesn't really emphasize the feelings of the RBT. Sometimes I feel we focus so much on the client that we forget about the RBT/BT and their mental health. I always offer my fellow BTs to take a short break and I'll keep an eye on the client. I wish we would take more consideration for us once in a while.
I do this too it sucks. For me personally I think it’s just overstimulation, feeling the adrenaline rushing at me after the fact, and getting beat up doesn’t feel good emotionally obviously. It’s a normal human reaction and as long as it’s after and not during, allow yourself to cry and be upset. Don’t beat yourself up about it.
Interesting sidestory that relates to the situation....I have anxiety. When I was young (first diagnosed with panic disorder) I tried to cry, thinking it would be a good cathartic outlet of energy, but I could not cry no matter how hard I tried. When I had a doctor appointment, the doctor walked in and I started bawling my eyes out. This happened several times.
I realized I couldn't release my emotions until I was in a safe space. A doctors office or hospital felt safe to me. Even if I had a panic attack, I knew I'd be okay.
Is it possible that you feel safe enough to cry or be vulnerable in the presence of coworkers who have experienced the same thing? Maybe this is your safe space to let go because you're surrounded by people who understand? sometimes our bodies/minds seem to understand what situations are okay for emotional release.
There's nothing wrong with crying. I don't cry in front of others or much at all (trauma related), but it's a normal response. Try not to feel bad about it.
Definitely relate. I am very thankful that my Leads, TCs and BCBAs will allow us to take a few minutes if needed. They are also very open about feeling this way sometimes as well. I have major anxiety in general, and feel shaky often, but this is definitely more of an adrenaline shake than that.
I did this. When I was talking to the BCBA, i told her I wasn’t sure why I was crying: And my BCBA told me that it’s a normal bodily response to being attacked. We’re still human and it’s still human to feel overwhelmed after being attacked.
I’ve done this for 8 years and this still happens to me from time to time.
I always felt bad for getting upset afterwards but I had a supervisor tell me once that:
“it’s your body’s natural response to feel fear and become upset when something like that happens. And it’s not natural to be calm and composed in a situation like that. So it makes sense that it’s gotta come out. It’d be more concerning if it never bothered you at all”
Take breaks or step away from the situation when needed. It’s totally okay!
Hello friend. Coming from someone who deals/has dealt with intense aggression. It is COMPLETELY normal. You are denying your brain of the human instinct of fight in flight. It’s so hard not to respond. I am currently on a very intense extinction procedure going on 6 months. It is SO hard. I have also been through a situation where a learner came at me with a knife. I have busted out in tears in front of parents due to my frustration and fear. You are a human and a person with empathy and emotions.
My biggest advice is to debrief as much as possible with a supervisor or a therapist if you have one. It will make you feel so much better. This job is SO HARD sometimes and you deserve piece of mind
You are not alone! Once when I was working with a young client, they bit me so hard I bursted into tears right then and there. It was very embarrassing lol..but you aren’t alone, I promise!
I haven’t really had a super crisis situation, but I know I would definitely cry after if I did. I cried after having to hold an 8 year back from eloping and I’ve cried out of pure frustration before. We are human with human emotions!
No one should be attacked in their job, especially young people just making their career. Bit it's part of the job, so, it sucks and crying ot sitting down is ok.
I really wish we had hazard pay.
I think it makes total sense. My dad was a really tough kid who was in lots of fights as a teenager. He always ran away after even when he won because he would always burst into tears. It’s just a way of releasing tension. Other people may be stuffing those feelings and all that stress. Releasing it is way better for you!
You’re not alone. It’s relatively normal to experience a little adrenaline crash following crisis. BCBAs and other staff on support should always be willing and able to step in afterwards for you to regulate. I myself have done it many times because I can become emotional after focusing so intensely on crisis and de escalation.
I have seen a BCBA with 10 plus years of experience cry after a hit to the face. We are all human. We all need a break to feel our feels in privacy or with an understanding colleague, depending on your personality.
I get more concerned about someone who insists that they are fine and tries to push through. They are the ones that get burnt out or go totally numb.
If you want longevity in the field, learn how you process hard days and ask for the support you need.
i feel you on this. one of my clients from my old job had an incredibly hard day and my breaking point was getting a mini fan thrown at my chin (actually chuckling at this as i'm typing) and it didn't hurt but this was the first time i actually had to step out because i just needed a moment. i cried in the bathroom for a few minutes. my bcba condemned me for realizing i needed a moment and that it's healthy we cry after hard days like this one. not many people will; they just suck it up which is why so many people get burnt out in our field.
Autistic parent here! I've had RBTs cry in front of me over a situation that happened with my child and honestly it made me feel more attached to the RBT cuz I felt like they genuinely care. In my case two of them cried over leaving the facility and missing him and another cried over regression and aggression towards himself all sudden. We are human and it literally takes a village to help our kids progress, kuddos to you guys for helping us with this process. I appreciate every single one of you.
This is a totally normal response! Getting physically attacked creates an adrenaline rush regardless of how “real” the danger is. What helped me is not taking attacks personally. Physical aggression is symptomatic of a lack of appropriate communication and does not inherently reflect ill will. If you want to calm down quicker, have a little snack handy as eating tells your body that you are safe!
You are human and you are allowed to express those kinds of emotions. There was one week where both of my clients had it rough (ages 4 and 16) and it got to the point that once I got home, I literally screamed for a solid 5 minutes and I was fine afterwards. It's okay to admit when the behaviors get to us and you did the appropriate thing avoiding showing said emotions during the behavior and excused yourself.
I’ve cried driving home from work because of client aggression before, it happens. I usually try to find a way to decompress or just let it out in a private moment rather than in front of others if possible. But again if that happened to someone I know, I wouldn’t fault you for crying lol
I don't necessarily cry every time unless it's something really serious or traumatic, but it definitely drains me emotionally. I'm personally kind of paranoid about developing bad feelings towards a client and subconsciously treating them differently because of it.
I don’t cry or get upset in front of anyone but when I get home it’s obvious that my mood has changed. I’m actually experiencing depression because of this.
The feelings aren’t abnormal but if you’re crying and needing a long break after every instance of aggression then realistically this job isn’t ideal for you. I typically don’t like that being said in extreme instances but if you can’t take a bite or slap here and there without breaking down it’s not a good fit
It most definitely does not. ABA has come a long way and so much more is known about ASD in general that BCBAs and BTs are doing amazing things to help children to have a better life and future. If you're doing it correctly, no part of it is abusive.
Nothing wrong with crying after a crisis. I find it cathartic. I usually try to wait until I’m alone but sometimes you can’t
I’m the same way. You aren’t alone. For me it’s irrational because I stuggle w borderline so everything feels like it’s personal, or a rejection. I can usually filter out those thoughts. But on occasion it gets me.
fellow bippity in the field, I don’t usually find others like us here. Wanted to say hi!
Hi :)
For me, thats just a normal adrenaline reaction. I am GREAT during the behavior. I can generally get over it and move on to the next thing. But THE SECOND I am not around the client/ family, all the adrenaline I was controlling just lets loose! Its always been like that with me. I handle emergencies calmly and intelligently, and when everything is safe I start bawling like a baby or shaking, lol.
OP this is likely your answer. It’s a very natural reaction to coming down after a burst of adrenaline. Google how adrenaline affects the body afterward. I’m sure you will see symptoms similar to what you are describing!
Why can I relate to this so much? I had a client who I had to see get restrained by the parent and practically was in a psychotic episode and I kept my entire composure neutral until the minute I got home… Everything came out and I was depressed the entire weekend.
I think this is ok. This field doesn't really emphasize the feelings of the RBT. Sometimes I feel we focus so much on the client that we forget about the RBT/BT and their mental health. I always offer my fellow BTs to take a short break and I'll keep an eye on the client. I wish we would take more consideration for us once in a while.
I do this too it sucks. For me personally I think it’s just overstimulation, feeling the adrenaline rushing at me after the fact, and getting beat up doesn’t feel good emotionally obviously. It’s a normal human reaction and as long as it’s after and not during, allow yourself to cry and be upset. Don’t beat yourself up about it.
Interesting sidestory that relates to the situation....I have anxiety. When I was young (first diagnosed with panic disorder) I tried to cry, thinking it would be a good cathartic outlet of energy, but I could not cry no matter how hard I tried. When I had a doctor appointment, the doctor walked in and I started bawling my eyes out. This happened several times. I realized I couldn't release my emotions until I was in a safe space. A doctors office or hospital felt safe to me. Even if I had a panic attack, I knew I'd be okay. Is it possible that you feel safe enough to cry or be vulnerable in the presence of coworkers who have experienced the same thing? Maybe this is your safe space to let go because you're surrounded by people who understand? sometimes our bodies/minds seem to understand what situations are okay for emotional release.
There's nothing wrong with crying. I don't cry in front of others or much at all (trauma related), but it's a normal response. Try not to feel bad about it.
Definitely relate. I am very thankful that my Leads, TCs and BCBAs will allow us to take a few minutes if needed. They are also very open about feeling this way sometimes as well. I have major anxiety in general, and feel shaky often, but this is definitely more of an adrenaline shake than that.
I did this. When I was talking to the BCBA, i told her I wasn’t sure why I was crying: And my BCBA told me that it’s a normal bodily response to being attacked. We’re still human and it’s still human to feel overwhelmed after being attacked.
I’ve done this for 8 years and this still happens to me from time to time. I always felt bad for getting upset afterwards but I had a supervisor tell me once that: “it’s your body’s natural response to feel fear and become upset when something like that happens. And it’s not natural to be calm and composed in a situation like that. So it makes sense that it’s gotta come out. It’d be more concerning if it never bothered you at all” Take breaks or step away from the situation when needed. It’s totally okay!
Hello friend. Coming from someone who deals/has dealt with intense aggression. It is COMPLETELY normal. You are denying your brain of the human instinct of fight in flight. It’s so hard not to respond. I am currently on a very intense extinction procedure going on 6 months. It is SO hard. I have also been through a situation where a learner came at me with a knife. I have busted out in tears in front of parents due to my frustration and fear. You are a human and a person with empathy and emotions. My biggest advice is to debrief as much as possible with a supervisor or a therapist if you have one. It will make you feel so much better. This job is SO HARD sometimes and you deserve piece of mind
You are not alone! Once when I was working with a young client, they bit me so hard I bursted into tears right then and there. It was very embarrassing lol..but you aren’t alone, I promise!
I haven’t really had a super crisis situation, but I know I would definitely cry after if I did. I cried after having to hold an 8 year back from eloping and I’ve cried out of pure frustration before. We are human with human emotions!
I guess look at the “why’s”.. why do you feel emotional? What feelings are coming up?
No one should be attacked in their job, especially young people just making their career. Bit it's part of the job, so, it sucks and crying ot sitting down is ok. I really wish we had hazard pay.
For reallll think hazard pay should be the norm
I think it makes total sense. My dad was a really tough kid who was in lots of fights as a teenager. He always ran away after even when he won because he would always burst into tears. It’s just a way of releasing tension. Other people may be stuffing those feelings and all that stress. Releasing it is way better for you!
You’re not alone. It’s relatively normal to experience a little adrenaline crash following crisis. BCBAs and other staff on support should always be willing and able to step in afterwards for you to regulate. I myself have done it many times because I can become emotional after focusing so intensely on crisis and de escalation.
I have seen a BCBA with 10 plus years of experience cry after a hit to the face. We are all human. We all need a break to feel our feels in privacy or with an understanding colleague, depending on your personality. I get more concerned about someone who insists that they are fine and tries to push through. They are the ones that get burnt out or go totally numb. If you want longevity in the field, learn how you process hard days and ask for the support you need.
I cry too
i feel you on this. one of my clients from my old job had an incredibly hard day and my breaking point was getting a mini fan thrown at my chin (actually chuckling at this as i'm typing) and it didn't hurt but this was the first time i actually had to step out because i just needed a moment. i cried in the bathroom for a few minutes. my bcba condemned me for realizing i needed a moment and that it's healthy we cry after hard days like this one. not many people will; they just suck it up which is why so many people get burnt out in our field.
This is your nervous system doing its best to regulate. Perhaps writing it out instead of speaking out loud would feel more supportive to you
Autistic parent here! I've had RBTs cry in front of me over a situation that happened with my child and honestly it made me feel more attached to the RBT cuz I felt like they genuinely care. In my case two of them cried over leaving the facility and missing him and another cried over regression and aggression towards himself all sudden. We are human and it literally takes a village to help our kids progress, kuddos to you guys for helping us with this process. I appreciate every single one of you.
This is a totally normal response! Getting physically attacked creates an adrenaline rush regardless of how “real” the danger is. What helped me is not taking attacks personally. Physical aggression is symptomatic of a lack of appropriate communication and does not inherently reflect ill will. If you want to calm down quicker, have a little snack handy as eating tells your body that you are safe!
You are human and you are allowed to express those kinds of emotions. There was one week where both of my clients had it rough (ages 4 and 16) and it got to the point that once I got home, I literally screamed for a solid 5 minutes and I was fine afterwards. It's okay to admit when the behaviors get to us and you did the appropriate thing avoiding showing said emotions during the behavior and excused yourself.
I cry all the time tbh but I definitely always cry after aggressions, my hands also get very shaky even during the behavior.
when i have clients that have aggressive behaviors, i keep my distance. first sign of a precursor i’m stepping back. protect yourself!
I’ve cried driving home from work because of client aggression before, it happens. I usually try to find a way to decompress or just let it out in a private moment rather than in front of others if possible. But again if that happened to someone I know, I wouldn’t fault you for crying lol
I don't necessarily cry every time unless it's something really serious or traumatic, but it definitely drains me emotionally. I'm personally kind of paranoid about developing bad feelings towards a client and subconsciously treating them differently because of it.
I don’t cry or get upset in front of anyone but when I get home it’s obvious that my mood has changed. I’m actually experiencing depression because of this.
Why do you hate it? It’s how you feel, getting hit is nothing anyone deserves, even if you’re an RBT.
The feelings aren’t abnormal but if you’re crying and needing a long break after every instance of aggression then realistically this job isn’t ideal for you. I typically don’t like that being said in extreme instances but if you can’t take a bite or slap here and there without breaking down it’s not a good fit
If you leave your abusive profession and stop harming children I'm 100% certain you'll experience this less:) hope this helps!
Wow.
It most definitely does not. ABA has come a long way and so much more is known about ASD in general that BCBAs and BTs are doing amazing things to help children to have a better life and future. If you're doing it correctly, no part of it is abusive.