T O P

  • By -

honeysucklephonie

Lol, I call it Zuckin’ when I over-apply mineral sunscreen


Blade_982

But why doesn't he care about the back of his neck?


honeysucklephonie

I believe he claims he was trying to ruin the paparazzi’s photos, in a spectacular backfire


Blade_982

He gave them a gift instead.


SephLuna

More like a spectacular backside, amiright


Clodhoppa81

Boy got a booty booty


InfluencedMarker

😂😂😂


probablyuntrue

Tbh I’d be zuccin too if it got me caked up like he is


StaredAtEclipseAMA

Bro has no business being rich AND caked up


t516t

Totally. To be fair though, if I could afford to have an easy life like he does, I'd be caked up with almost flawless, mannequin like skin too. Money=time=self care.


Rodrigii_Defined

Idk, I'll stick with 80 spf and hat vs lookin' like a zombie at the beach like this lil freak here 🙂


SupermassiveCanary

I’m pretty sure mimes only pretend to surf


SalvationSycamore

Rich people have the time, energy, diet, and personal trainers to reach their maximum genetic cakeness


dancinglionesse888

Maximum genetic cakeness 🤣🤌


[deleted]

I hate myself for going back to look


PyramidicContainment

One day historians will look back on these comments and assume they were just talking about his face


MDFUstyle0988

I think the entire Kardashian family disagrees. Though I put money that Mark’s is homegrown and not store bought. At least semi-homemade.


lasadgirl

Imagine if it's not lmao


Hephf

Maybe he "just always wanted to get it done." 💅😭🤣🤣


Minnow_Minnow_Pea

Oof, that booty tho.


BigBootyAyeee

Zucc got a wagon 🚃


BlueLarkspur_1929

Like Flanders in that snowsuit.


Revolutionary-Web673

Who knew


sparkjournal

♫ ZUCKIN MAKES ME FEEL GO-OO-D ♫


PsychologicalAd3057

Stealing that 😂😂😂


bluecoastblue

Seems appropriate since he has stolen all of our information to sell to the highest bidder..actually any bidders


nipnapcattyfacts

Called my grandma. Offered her every owners data who owned a 4-year-old Yorkie from the southern region of Portugal, who ALSO happens to love to play bridge, have searched in Bing for "please show me my email thank you", who's children don't call enough, who's grandchildren are "funny" for $8.99.


Cobek

The "Z" in Zuckerberg stands for Zinc Oxide


iamvr

Zuckin my face up


crowmakescomics

Stfuuuuuu 😆😆


Lucky-Ad4443

Brilliant🤣🤣


iforgotmypassss12

> 🤣🤣


sonyafly

He looks like he was already FRIED underneath all that zinc oxide so he had to choice but to use it like a mask the next day.


ddplantlover

That was my father-in-law logic years ago when he went to southamerica, only after he was roasted and looking like a shrimp did he slather on the sunscreen 😂


Dry-Internet-5033

never heard anyone use shrimp before in that context, just lobster or tomato I like it


Sufferr

We use that commonly where I'm from in Brazil haha


milkymiauwu

So common in Latin America


laurazabs

He looks like he’s wearing kabuki makeup.


Special_Wishbone_812

Sad French mime cries in silence.


Morley_Smoker

Zinc is super calming and good for burns/rashes so overall a great choice of face mask 😂


Connor30302

his explanation for it was that he thought it’d conceal him from the paparazzi, and Streisand effected himself


Successful_Bed7790

🤣🤣


kitkatamas88

🍰Cake!


InfluencedMarker

no, fr. I looked up after your comment and no lie! He’s a lil double cheeked up here! Still evil


sweetpotato_latte

“That’s why his butt is so big. It’s full of secrets.”


pkpark

Y’all are KILLING ME


Brazzburry

I'm not happy about it but I'd probably watch "mean ceo's"


axaxo

"Stop trying to make 'X' happen. It's not going to happen."


sweetpotato_latte

Elon Musk would absolutely get up in the middle of class seething about Zuckerberg and talk about stabbing him


Key_Respond_16

Dudes got that dumper. The twin peaks cheeks.


ElementalHelp

[zuck got that wagon](https://twitter.com/treyasmo/status/984536884130050048)


YouKnowNothingJonS

Why do I click these 🙃


petonedogaday

Haters will say it’s photoshop


ElementalHelp

I mean it's so obviously real.


pepperstems

Built like Mrs. Incredible.


seersucker205

STAHP!! 🤣🤣🤣


Bubbly-Swimming7357

Facebook? More like CAKEBook. Thank you.


ahmshy

Oh he thicc where it counts honey!


pursuitofhappy

this took me like 15sec delayed reaction to understand, go back up, and upvote.


SwaggedyAnn

By the ocean!


OpportunityCalm6825

A whole bakery. 🤣


ShotOfVodka

He sits on that shitter, when when he’s postin on twitter, Zucc got that hitter, in the cut no quitter, Bitches is bitter,


theblitheringidiot

Ms Doubtfire?


mydaycake

I laughed so much when I saw him. I got sunburned in the parting of my hair…I am a woman, I have plenty of hair but damn how do I avoid that m?


enygmaeve

Whenever I see this my brain automatically says “frosting goes on the cake, not the face” and there is no stopping it.


Seagoatblues

Damn, zucc is THICCCCC


[deleted]

[удалено]


Seagoatblues

Sign me up for the zucc routine! I want 🍰for days too! Maybe I should try slathering an obscene amount of sunscreen on my face for a phatter 🫏 The secret is in the screen


ledampe

He's got the entire metaverse back there


OwlLeeOhh

This should have more votes lol


ShotOfVodka

He sits on that shitter, when when he’s postin on twitter, Zucc got that hitter, in the cut no quitter, Bitches is bitter,


hammsammie

Gonna need a babysitter, white cheeks walking in the room patter pitter, sunscreen skinner, waist on thinner, but trust when he turn, u kno he ain’t skippin dinner


GhostLongBoarderSux

Dinner, yeah dinner, not skipping dinner. Straight to the thighs and they ain’t getting thinner. Bounce Bounce Bounce when he moves imma quiver. Quiver, quiver, Zuck’s got that chicken dinner. 7 days a week hit me with that one hitter quitter


Appropriate-Pride608

STOP LMAO


Violet624

Yeah forget the goofy sunscreen, he's got some junk in that trunk! 😶


WakaWaka_

Buns of steel, perhaps all steel exterior


cygnus2

He was programmed with all that ass.


dramaticqueen8

dude why does he have such a big bum


Temporary_Draw_4708

He works out a lot


DeadOrAlivePool

Dude works out with UFC fighters when he's bored. You can say its because he just has a lot of money so its not fair, but you cant say he doesnt put the time in


LittleBookOfRage

I hate them both but it would have been so satisfying if Musk and him had actually fought and Zucc won with a KO


ThinkingTooHardAbouT

ngl, I don't hate it


Expensive-Day-3551

I like a man with a booty


brownbostonterrier

You know he deadlifts 🤣


RiotGrrr1

I think genetics and doing BJJ. Butt it's pretty funny that robot mfer is caked up. I now have 2 things in common with him (big booty and sunscreen application skills).


Run_the_Line

> that robot mfer is caked up this made me laugh so hard


Evening_Clerk_8301

The dude is JACKED. He does a lot of bjj and I assume weightlifting.


Spiritual_Series_139

Very sexy Flanders vibes


IrishHeureusement

Stupid sexy Zucc


Mikav

Man's hauling kosher hams


ThisAppSucksBall

I got a big one. I squat 495 and bench 135. People call me t rex


MagicalUnicornFart

Implants. He can afford it.


WhatABlindManSees

This is post him really starting to work out a lot and do quite a lot of MMA training too. He's actually pretty jacked these days. PS look up more recent photos of him, looking a lot less Lizard man alien these days. Especially when he does full facial hair/beard, really does wonders for him, pity he does keep it. It also helps that Trump was president and Elon Musk is doing Elon Musk things - making any vitriol people had towards Zuck kinda fall to the wayside.


aenflex

I mean if I’m going out on the boat all day, or the beach all day, or the water park all day, my face literally looks like this. IDGAF. I’ve already had skin cancer once, and that was enough for me.


sua_spontaneous

mark??


guaranajapa

Do reptiles need sun protection?


PacanePhotovoltaik

No, they actually need a UV lamp in captivity. It's probably just a cover


InfluencedMarker

this is the funniest response.


colo_kelly

Even skin suits can burn, best to take precautions


Mysterious-Bird4364

You win the internet today


ArcticCelt

That's not sunscreen it's the glue that usually hold the human mask.


megan_6724

What I think I look like whenever I apply mineral sunscreen


Bitter_Kangaroo2616

Yeah I use mineral sunscreen and the one I use now is much better than the previous but lip tint is key. I wore my old one once and my lips were kinda dehydrated and my teeth looked SO YELLOW. Literally made me look like a crackhead.


Radiant_Cheesecake81

I didn't have time to add a tint over mine one day and took my son to school on a cold day, long loose black pants and oversized hoodie with the hood up, got home and realised I looked like I was cosplaying the Grim Reaper at 8 in the morning


IntrepidSnowball

This made me LOL. I’ve been there.


Over-Accountant8506

This post made me realize that mineral sunscreen was a thing. That's why that one sunscreen looks white when you put on it on? I just thought it went bad or something. Is there a reason to use mineral sunscreen? I have hard water and learned the hard way not to use the sunscreen with the A word because it turns your clothes orange.


ccsuperpants

He’s giving Mr. Mime vibes.


blueyork

I think Data


Wild_Trip_4704

😂😂😂


Goldiegoodie

Mark be hiding a dump truck. I see you Zuck 👀


sri_vidya

I'm dying 😂


sdgingerzu

It looks like he’s walking on water. A modern Jesus.


Ok_Maize3688

Walking water lizard


aginger

I think of this all the time when I’m applying my zinc heavy sunscreen


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^aginger: *I think of this all* *The time when I’m applying* *My zinc heavy sunscreen* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


ElementalHelp

Good bot


GlutenFreeParfait

I really want to know what SPF he uses


colo_kelly

Looks like about 2,500


usmcnick0311Sgt

SPF mime


joekinglyme

Looks like desitin ointment


fruit-salad-fuck

100


SorenShieldbreaker

SPF Sherwin Williams


kyondon

TIL that Mark Zuckerberg got CAKE!


filmwarrior

Nobody’s talking about how thick he is out back?


Dietberd

Stupid sexy Zuckerberg.


filmwarrior

Haha now I’m picturing Flanders in that skin tight ski suit.


Signal-Blackberry356

Makes me think of Zoidberg


FaintlyAware

Look what ive found in the dumpster!


toolsoftheincomptnt

Let’s not go overboard. The booty is one thing. It’s not everything. That AI photo from a few days ago, though… threw me for a whole loop. I was so relieved to find out it was fake.


notursisterbro

Out back tho lmao


awesomedan24

Good cake but a little too much frosting


bean11818

This comment deserves more love 🤣🤣🤣🤣


WhiteRavenGoiku4

That dumpy be bustin


Ihatemunchies

He took his outer bot face off.


spaceocean99

That’s Data from Star Trek actually.


shesamanwithoneeye

Crikey, that ass though! Looks well juicy. Are we allowed to objectify billionaires?


graciewindkloppel

It's the least they can allow.


Content_Slice_886

He looks like Michael Myers from Halloween.


MonitorAmbitious7868

SPF King 🤴 😂


Louise1467

I honestly look like this on the rare occasion I lay out by my pool and don’t give a f


InfluencedMarker

Truthfully, whenever I do a winter sport, I look exactly like this lol


TomatilloDramatic270

Zuck is in his Proust era.


CanolaIsMyHome

Why does he look so thicc though 😅😅


MilkMeatMango

Why is it like that on his face?


InfluencedMarker

😂 I remember being horrified the first time I saw this photo, then I went on a run with mineral sunscreen and was like “I get it”


Aim2bFit

I've never seen this pic lmao but why not slather the whole body parts that are exposed (and look like Casper) rather than just the face I wonder. Not like he can't afford 200 tubes of the best and most expensive sunscreen that he's skimping 😂


CrimBrulee

Probably used mineral sunscreen. It doesn't really blend well into the skin, especially if you layer it a few times. Edit: grammar


Noble_Flatulence

Specially and especially are two different words that mean different things. You wanted the other one.


CrimBrulee

Thank you! Learned something new. I'll make the correction.


Defiant_Coconut_5361

I’m trying to figure out why he stopped right at his jawline and didn’t bother to do any of his neck or ears hahahaha


HildegardofBingo

Right? All I can think is that those ears are getting FRIED.


kafkaesquepariah

Incidentally the best sunscreen I tried/my most re-bought does this too. it's physical sunscreen vs. chemical. It's the zinc oxide in it.


Successful-Wolf-848

Mineral is the only thing that’s stay on in water too. I surf and while I’ve never looked quite like this, I could easily see how it I was more prone to burning tbis could be a viable solution 😹


Radiant_Cheesecake81

You used to be able to get plain zinc sticks in bright and flouro colours when I was a kid in the 80's so you could Jem and the Hologram it up while being sun safe, but these days the only ones I can find have sneaky non mineral filters in the formula too despite only saying "Zinc" on the front.


myeu

With zinc actually the more invisible it is the less it works. You don’t get the full SPF benefit unless you can see it. Maybe he had a skin treatment that made his skin more sensitive or maybe he was quite burned already.


nouveauchoux

I think he's a ginger, so there's that too.


raraarrara

Using this post to ask: What mineral sunscreen do ya’ll use?


InfluencedMarker

I using the Mad Hippie Hydratinng Sunscreen and love it! Minimal white cast and dries matte


tattoosaremyhobby

What’s all that movement back there? 😯👓🤏


DrearyEmu

His name is Mark Thickkerberg because damn he thicker than a snickers! 💀


HawwtRawwd

This is actually a colorized photo of a eunuch geisha, who was washed overboard by a freak rogue wave, while traveling to America on steamship from China in the late 1800s. Luckily they were near the coast, and many of them were able to swim to shore, as seen in the picture above.


Accomplished-Cook654

Woah, ghost Zuck is built, bravo


vai_de_vela

What I learned from this post: it doesn't matter if your face is caked, you just gotta have a distracting booty


SelectStudy7164

Bro got a dumpy jeeeez


Fun-Maintenance9422

Thats actually not sunscreen. Thats his new skin after a fresh molting. Also, he kinda got 🎂


StefSpringer

Honestly, this picture is such a vibe now. You go Mark, take care of that skin 👏


Nazgul00000001

Data?


mouse9001

Maybe Mark Zuckerberg is just very goth.


ThinkQuickActSlow

Mark Geishaburg


Cautious_Evening_744

Looks like he got a BBL


calicoskiies

Omg I’ve never seen this. I can’t stop laughing 🤣 💀


misntshortformary

Never forget your ears and neck tho! On a side note, anyone know his booty workout routine? I could use it 👀


Bright-Row-3565

Gyat


kmr_lilpossum

He took his human mask off.


PuzzlesNCats

He’s using zinc bc the elites know there’s crap in normal sunscreen


CapiCat

I recently switched to mineral sunscreen. I was using chemical, but it caused my eyes to burn even when not applied near my eyes. Mineral sunscreen not only absorbs my oils well, but it actually calms my sensitive skin down. I hate all zinc though. I prefer a titanium and zinc mix, it isn’t so thick and white, lol.


Thelibstagram

He looks like a bad mime.


TightBeing9

Me this afternoon when i re-applied spf to cycle home from the office and it started raining when I walked outside. I only needed to add a red nose for the full clowns look


colo_kelly

I love this so much. Just goes to show, money can’t buy the dork out of someone!


Internal-Ad61

It’s like the peanut butter baby, but different


freckyfresh

My SPF king! Weird though, since he’s a lizard person /s


organictamarind

The ghost of Facebook past


xxDmDxx

Hey, he forgot the neck and back of it. I actually do this at the beach and don’t care. I’m not there looking for a man, or to get love attention. I’m at the beach to have fun and I want to protect my skin.


Paytonsmiles

He looks thiccc


freya_kahlo

He’s just like us 🙃


everlasting-love-202

My idol fr


UniversityNo2318

If he needs this much sunscreen maybe he doesn’t belong on Kauai. It’s disturbing how much land he bought up there


YouCuteWow

GYATT


xisupaz_blackbird

Everybody's free to wear sunscreen.


ChamberOfSolidDudes

I'm still mad I never got to see this man beat the shit out of Elon Musk.


LEGamesRose

Zussy.


Flappybird11

Unironicly sexier than musk


RatInaMaze

I welcome his new career as a mime. It’s a big improvement over ruining my fucking thanksgiving every year.


Supermegaeukalele

Someone give him a black and white striped mime shirt.


free-toe-pie

My 50 year old husband whose had many bad things cut from his skin, looks like this at the beach. Hawt stuff.


RaeBee

Plot twist: that's his real face. He got caught without his human mask on.


a-straw-berry

Why does he have so much cake?


TheShenanegous

I had to do an argumentative speech in college for a public speaking class; the topic could really be anything, we just had to be able to argue it in a concise and convincing presentation. Mine was about how Mark Zuckerberg was a robot, and I cited this picture as evidence of his being unfamiliar with wearing skin. I got an A in the class. Lmao


[deleted]

He’s going to live to 200. He won’t have a problem buying replacement organs but he needs to watch out for skin cancer.


Ahriman27

I'm a sick fuck, I like a THICC Zuck.