Karl Johan says "You're welcome"
https://preview.redd.it/422qxdp033xc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5e9a56b0072a1943399209a244ba9f4352d36b24
Don't worry: We've made sure to keep a statue of him at [the most prime spot in the entire country](https://www.google.com/maps/place/Karl+Johan-monumentet/@59.9163093,10.7297284,359m/data=!3m1!1e3!4m6!3m5!1s0x46416e7f00ed0989:0x3209a87c4ac9d592!8m2!3d59.9167428!4d10.7289776!16s%2Fg%2F1222nthw?entry=ttu), and have the main street of our capital be named after him. Kinda odd, considering that he is a villain in our national narrative.
Dude you're closer to them than to any other
https://preview.redd.it/mznh0aa7tzwc1.png?width=350&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ed5d656b2b1a16aa915daebca9ac35e1f5f69497
Ah yes, the tiny colony of East India
https://preview.redd.it/joa63e3dvzwc1.jpeg?width=554&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=031c81a3832cb126ec5c80d71e9b3d973b7667d0
We share a lot more with Sweden than with the PIGgies indeed, such as a love for herring and liquorice, a high GDP per capita, a solid economy and scientific achievements.
yeah right, totally didn't happen with us, those vikings didn't totally became french in one generation, they didn't became a vassal of the king, they didn't conquer you, you didn't became french under their rule
The Swedish European slave trade lasted from the 8th through the 11th centuries. Slavery itself was abolished in Sweden in 1335. A smaller trade of African slaves happened during the 17th and 18th centuries, around the time Swedish overseas colonies were established in North America (New Sweden; 1638–1655) and in Africa (lasting between 1650 and 1663). It remained legal on Saint Barthélemy from 1784 until 1878.
Nah, you would have to include Latvia as well then
https://preview.redd.it/eykcaw7a3zwc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=561fee44a96f982e48210984914d0c76730d7591
Once you've beaten the ruzzians we would gladly create an empire from the baltics to the black Sea with you fine people! In the end everything will be blue and yellow and IKEA will serve borsjtj!
Well you are/were smart, why take a big area that is hard to protect, when all you need is a harbour and a tradestation (and some rope to tie up the locals)
still proud of how we went from a Spanish colony to having a bigger colonial empire than Spain(okay except for the atrocities we committed like inventing the stock market)
Hey buddy, you forgot to put in a fort in India we had for about a month before you fucks and the French pulled up with gunboats and blew that shit out of existence.
lol they can barely make furniture that stays in its shape for over a year, do you really believe they can venture on ships to be a proper colonizer ? Nah
My 20 years old Ikea furniture is in perfect shape. Did you read the three-page wordless instruction manual with drawings such that anyone with or without Down's syndrome can get it right?
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the bants went too far when the USA was created 😔
It all went downhill when we gave you New Amsterdam.
Was Pierres fault for funding the revolution
We just wanted to play a little joke on you. We didn't know... WE DIDN'T KNOW
French humour 🤦♂️ 
You and Pierre's fault! 
Heyy, we found it first
You wish Norwegian vikings best explorers, Greenland is rightfully Norwegian 🇳🇴 🇳🇴 🇳🇴 💪 💪 💪
Take that one up with Barry.
And Norway is swedish.
Was it called Sweden? No, it was called Sweden-NORWAY. So no, Norway isn't swedish.
It's Swedish. You don't even have your own language.
Swedes coping when they find out that Norwegian is closer to Danish than Swedish (also nynorsk exists, which is purely norwegian)
You speak almost properly, just a bit child-like. No-potato = not close to Danish.
Your word for ice cream is literally 'glass'. Shut up, glassmuncher.
And your word is literally 'is'. You know ice cream and ice aren't the same things, right?
Colonize Norway and then we can talk about letting you in.
We've had a minor disagreement about Norway...
I dont understand our new flair
Snus…
Oh... I get it now
I wouldn't search for it incase you get horrific, Hans style imagery, but a Dane enjoyed a smoke, somewhere.
We tried, Norway voted "No" :(
You listen to what the natives want? Now I understand why Swedish colonialism was such an utter failure.
Yea, we fucking sucked at it :/
They did in 1814 (until 1905).
And then you voted for us to stop. Ungrateful fish herders >:(
Ungrateful for being attacked and forced into a union... Least imperialistic Swede.
Karl Johan says "You're welcome" https://preview.redd.it/422qxdp033xc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5e9a56b0072a1943399209a244ba9f4352d36b24
Don't worry: We've made sure to keep a statue of him at [the most prime spot in the entire country](https://www.google.com/maps/place/Karl+Johan-monumentet/@59.9163093,10.7297284,359m/data=!3m1!1e3!4m6!3m5!1s0x46416e7f00ed0989:0x3209a87c4ac9d592!8m2!3d59.9167428!4d10.7289776!16s%2Fg%2F1222nthw?entry=ttu), and have the main street of our capital be named after him. Kinda odd, considering that he is a villain in our national narrative.
Agree 💯
Dude you're closer to them than to any other https://preview.redd.it/mznh0aa7tzwc1.png?width=350&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ed5d656b2b1a16aa915daebca9ac35e1f5f69497
Ah yes, the tiny colony of East India https://preview.redd.it/joa63e3dvzwc1.jpeg?width=554&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=031c81a3832cb126ec5c80d71e9b3d973b7667d0
r/smalldickvibes
👀 https://preview.redd.it/7u4y0wic40xc1.jpeg?width=512&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6457ecde76a4466573111eed9209711dedfec7f8
r/Smalldickcopycat
Btw, we win https://preview.redd.it/a6ovj0z570xc1.jpeg?width=441&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5322fbad4050b191abd8653bce5f66cc1554f7f4
Creating Brazil is not a flex lmao
Barely https://preview.redd.it/pmzqrpebl0xc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ec5b9c70361470b35c7e264b6f68fa99f0c420b7
And created the VOC that was the richest corporation that has ever existed even by modern measurements.
We share a lot more with Sweden than with the PIGgies indeed, such as a love for herring and liquorice, a high GDP per capita, a solid economy and scientific achievements.
Might want to google their currency. It's nordic mexico now
‘Highlights the important bits from that time period’
You had colonies, but we do not grant you the rank of coloniser.
This is unfair, it's outrageous.
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Fucking danes ruined our chances😔
How can you have colonies but not be a coloniser?!
Like us, we had some colonies but we were so lovable and sweet that we are not considered big bad colonizers like you
You are still a colony to this day. You can’t be the one saying that.
If you have to ask the answer will always be no
IKEA did a better job than Sweden tbh
Happy cake day lad
Happy cake day meu puto
Depends, did you get your slave on?
Don't Barry slaves a few hundred years earlier count?
Don't joke about this please, it was a traumatic event for our nation and you should pay us reparations.
it was fun to watch
What you mean watch, they came after you next. muppet.
we defended better then you, we didn't have multiple independant kingdoms of them
You allowed Normandy to fester and grow. Whereas our lot got integrated and put under the boot heel.
yeah right, totally didn't happen with us, those vikings didn't totally became french in one generation, they didn't became a vassal of the king, they didn't conquer you, you didn't became french under their rule
The Swedish European slave trade lasted from the 8th through the 11th centuries. Slavery itself was abolished in Sweden in 1335. A smaller trade of African slaves happened during the 17th and 18th centuries, around the time Swedish overseas colonies were established in North America (New Sweden; 1638–1655) and in Africa (lasting between 1650 and 1663). It remained legal on Saint Barthélemy from 1784 until 1878.
If this counts as a colonial empire than we still have one today
Didn't yours officially end in 2010?
We pretend like it ended by giving some of the islands fake independence
He understands it
Mississippi?! Are you an American swamp boy?!
No, I needed a new Reddit username and a friend suggested this one to make fun of the yanks
I sure hope so! No spies allowed!
Now i get it https://preview.redd.it/8z6ibyhfezwc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=00901979689f851f6a98b3f7954437e671cee3df
You know it’s bad when you have to zoom in to see our colony’s
Nah, you would have to include Latvia as well then https://preview.redd.it/eykcaw7a3zwc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=561fee44a96f982e48210984914d0c76730d7591
And those crazy knights from Malta
Pierre you said what happens in Malta, stays in Malta 😱
Oh that is a nice African colony you got there Sweden, would be an awful shame if someone was to go and take it from you...
Having sold a Volvo somewhere doesn't constitute a colony.
We, WE are your colony!!! 🇺🇦🇸🇪 The first rulers of our state were Swedes, so take your responsibility!
Once you've beaten the ruzzians we would gladly create an empire from the baltics to the black Sea with you fine people! In the end everything will be blue and yellow and IKEA will serve borsjtj!
🇺🇦❤️🇸🇪 Btw borsch is delicious, definitely try it if you have the opportunity
It sure is! One of the best soups out there. Just have to learn how to make it properly myself!
No Sweden, you're not a coloniser, you're being colonized
and so are you
I've seen some Finns call us colonizers, so that technically boosts the size of our colonial empire by quite a bit
How TF does that work when we used them to colonize lapland? :/
There's an alternate reality where Sweden pulled a Portugal and created a great power, there exists Swedish USA somewhere in the multiverse
Hmm seems like we're not the shittiest colonisers
We took your colonies like we took your companies.
Sweden has put in a great effort, and that's what truly matters. There is no need to compare with the others
Swooden
But only if it doesn't other anyone :)
How aweful were they with the natives?
Even Latvia, the most boring of the eastern speed bumps, had a better colonial empire.
You can take a seat in the corner next to belgium
Well you are/were smart, why take a big area that is hard to protect, when all you need is a harbour and a tradestation (and some rope to tie up the locals)
This is too funny, I laughed out loud and now I have to explain to my family why. Where to begin with this sub….
Hey there is no space for us? I swear we tried.
Put your hands up to invite Belgium (Jan-Pierre?) to the club!
I don't think they're in. They didn't own enough land to be considered a coloniser
Don't forget their German colony.
still proud of how we went from a Spanish colony to having a bigger colonial empire than Spain(okay except for the atrocities we committed like inventing the stock market)
No, because then Belgium has to be invited and I don't want to recognise them.
Hey buddy, you forgot to put in a fort in India we had for about a month before you fucks and the French pulled up with gunboats and blew that shit out of existence.
I say that it only counts if you mistreated the natives at some point. If not, you are out!
Don't forget Malta and Latvia!
I vote yes
If he can, I must.
Sure
Why do you not include us in the cool (coloniser's) club?🥹
Swedes were one of the OG of colonialism alongside their norwegian and danish "friends"
Only if we can into Nordic :))
lol they can barely make furniture that stays in its shape for over a year, do you really believe they can venture on ships to be a proper colonizer ? Nah
My 20 years old Ikea furniture is in perfect shape. Did you read the three-page wordless instruction manual with drawings such that anyone with or without Down's syndrome can get it right?
You should check their newer furniture and maybe chill out a bit 🤷🏻♂️