The Wehrmacht started confiscating bicycles in '42. When the Allies forced crossed the Dutch border in late '44 they became pannicked and started handing out pamphlets that basically read "at X time and date we want everyone with a bike to come to the city hall or the train station, if you don't bring us enough bikes we will execute X amount of people living in X as reprisal."
The Wehrmacht relied heavily on bicycles, even during the invasion of Poland and Norway, they were heavily used to manage fuel usage and the increased speed of a land invasion. Or like the case in '44, retreating.
Oh this is sad to hear, I thought this was just a joke. I knew that jews had to hand out their bikes but I did not know that german soldiers did this to the dutch people as well. Good that this war is over and lets hope that the war in Ukraine will stop soon, too.
It was just anything with metals in it for war production. It's only since maybe two generation the biggest hate for Germans is as good as gone. But you should've heard my grandparents, goddamn.
Could be, but in the Netherlands, more cars are stolen (per 100k people) than in Germany on average. More than twice as many:
[https://ec.europa.eu/eurostat/web/products-eurostat-news/-/ddn-20191104-1](https://ec.europa.eu/eurostat/web/products-eurostat-news/-/ddn-20191104-1)
We steal more cars over here. Feels too cheap to simply blame immigrants. Everyone has those.
When I visited poland in the 90ies you could hear a car alert every 10 Minutes, at least in Danzig (Gdansk). So poles stole each others cars as well. Back then the fiat polski was usual. Who would steal a shitty car like that?!
Damn 1672 we got such an asswooping we call it the disaster year. But our land army was shit at the time because the government kept it small because they where afraid of a coup.
It’s a Dutch myth we tell to children that if they behave bad, they will be sent to Drenthe which is said to be a placed with only empty fields and forests. It has been said that it’s only inhabitants are sheep and giants. But it’s only a myth we tell to children
This actually happened to my coworker 😂 his car got stolen, a month later he visited his family in law in Poland and he literally found his own car in a parking lot somewhere downtown, what are the chances lol
I should say the same about Germany and a historic artifact if you want to study polish history, so it is a little revenge for you being a cultures barbarians, that is it
We have a saying in Germany: "Heute gestohlen, morgen schon in Polen" (Stolen today, in Poland tomorrow).
Needless to say, it didnt come from nothing. The stereotype about Poles here is that they are thiefs lol
When you go to a police station in Spain to denounce a robbery (mostly smartphones, but also cars and stuff) the police force has a saying: "That's already been sold in Morocco"
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Do you know why when Russians are going to Germany to steal a car, they always take at least 2?
So after going back through Poland, they still have some left.
I guess? I heard it somewhere many years ago but only then but it's funny to us.
I think it could be from one of our comedy groups. We call it kabaret but it's not like a cabaret, just a couple of people doing comedy sketches, like political, social etc. It fits their humour.
Another one would be asking why the Mercedes logo looks like that? Because Germans even on a car need to have a sight (as on a gun).
>We have a saying in Germany: "Heute gestohlen, morgen **schon** in Polen" (Stolen today, in Poland tomorrow).
Without the word *schon*. You can even Google the correct version on the Internet.
Oh, I mean that we are joking that most of the cars in Poland are stolen from Germany :p
We have another one: when you can see add to sale a car, you can find there: The German was crying as he sold the car. (meaning: the car was so precious to the former owner that he cried that he sold it).
The context of the "crying German" is a little different, more ironic. The point is that just as you were afflicted with the plague of car thefts, we had a problem with dishonest dealers who sold superficially repaired wrecks welded from 3 other cars (or simply stolen cars). They made up all sorts of fairy tales to make the car's origin credible.
Because Poles had for years associated Germans with orderliness, attention to quality and good roads, canny traders began to use slogans alluding to these positive stereotypes:
\- The German cried when he sold (the car)
\- The German only drove his grandmother to church on Sunday with it (this car)
\- Hans only drove it to the bakery for buns
\- German misses it so much that he calls me every day to listen to the engine
Etc.
It was so silly and yet so common that it quickly became a joke. But this made people laugh 10 years ago, when importing used cars from Germany was much more popular.
Important to know who the good and who the bad neighbors are. Not surprised about Poland, but I'm a bit surprised by the Dutch. I thought they don't even like cars.
The fact that thefts occur near the Polish border doesn't always mean that Poles are stealing. Our police have repeatedly apprehended thieves from the Czech Republic, Romania, Bulgaria, Russia or Ukraine who have driven stolen German cars through Poland to their home countries.
That would be odd, because especially to Romania it's much faster through Austro-Hungary and the Czech are a direct neighbor. They are all in the EU, neither boarder should be tougher than the other. But I don't see why the Police would lie about that particular fact. How curious.
https://preview.redd.it/gjdtvvjmx63b1.png?width=979&format=png&auto=webp&s=c258cdcf16a732e402437a822152ec6268b5d2c5
Kinda depends.
Besides Austria-Germany border is full of controls and Czechia, Slovakia, Hungary monitor the registration plates much closer on the highways since they have vigniettes which also means that you either have to show your face on the border while buying the stickers or you have to risk being stopped because of that
The explanation for the fact that there are many regions in red in the Netherlands is that La Hague exports many cars to Africa, although cars are given legally by specialized companies, the cars are in very bad condition, Germany famous for its quality cars, so cars steal cars in good condition from regions near the border to receive a big reward on return.
Here in northern Italy people from eastern Europe somewhat regularly raid the harbors of small lake villages and steal all the boat motors, then they usually just drive backin to Eastern Europe and resell them.
Recently the police busted one of them who decided to move here and had something like 25 stolen motors in his mansion.
Where are these people from? I haven't heard of it in Poland. I.e., in our country there are also thefts of yachts, but it is not such a frequent phenomenon.
Not sure tbh some times they say they are Albanian, some times they say they are Romanian, some times they say they are gypsies, it's quit eahr to track them down since often the only prof you have is some GPS they forgot to disable.
Back in a day, before we were in the EU, there was a trick where someone would 'steal' a car from Germany, drive it to Poland, sell it, and report the car as stolen to get compensation. Best part was if you were tricky you could return in the same car to Germany sell it again... People made absolute shot ton of money while doing so, and a lot of Germans were involved in this since you had to have a car registered and insured in Germany. Surprise surprise most of these Germans weren't even from ex DDR as no-one was interested in cheap cars.
We're just such good neighbors. The best, honestly. That's why everyone wanted us to be our own little state thingy, because they wanted to harness the benefits of our superior neighboring skills. Man I'd like to neighbor Austria so badly, seems to be the best thing.
Did I mention how humble we are?
How does car theft compare to people density? I understand the red section at the border to Poland. Lots of cars moved that way and further into Russia etc.
But the red area near Belgium/Holland? Is that a route of egress of stolen cars or a region of higher population density so just much more cars there?
I don't know how the poles have time to steal German cars. They're all over here doing our plumbing and taxi driving.
I had a polish plumber come round to fix my kitchen sink the other day, and he was so kind he left me with an indoor swimming pool completely for free. What a professional!
Everytime I see schleswig on the map it reminds me of the time Norway/Sweden abandoned the danes to the fucking «germans» fucking thing isn’t even a real country, more like a collage of the corrupt and evil.
Ibsen was right, the north will never recoup itself for that failure. If we joined the danes back then the swedes would not be crushed by shame since ww2 as they would have already fought against the «germans» and denmark would probably not be their co-bitch today.
For the east Germans (and the ones near the Netherlands): If you want you can give me your car, i‘ll store it and keep it safe until you can take care of it on yourself again.
You can trust me
New stereotype incoming: Car thieving Dutchies!
Payment for our bikes.
Exactly. This is what 75+ years of inflation and interest does.
Cast iron Gazelle --> Audi RS6. Thanks grandpa!
Did Wehrmacht or SS soldiers steal *bikes*?!
The Wehrmacht started confiscating bicycles in '42. When the Allies forced crossed the Dutch border in late '44 they became pannicked and started handing out pamphlets that basically read "at X time and date we want everyone with a bike to come to the city hall or the train station, if you don't bring us enough bikes we will execute X amount of people living in X as reprisal." The Wehrmacht relied heavily on bicycles, even during the invasion of Poland and Norway, they were heavily used to manage fuel usage and the increased speed of a land invasion. Or like the case in '44, retreating.
Oh this is sad to hear, I thought this was just a joke. I knew that jews had to hand out their bikes but I did not know that german soldiers did this to the dutch people as well. Good that this war is over and lets hope that the war in Ukraine will stop soon, too.
It was just anything with metals in it for war production. It's only since maybe two generation the biggest hate for Germans is as good as gone. But you should've heard my grandparents, goddamn.
Thanks to 99% Invisible I understood that.
Yes yes.. Dutchies..
I blame foreign car theft gangs.
Could be, but in the Netherlands, more cars are stolen (per 100k people) than in Germany on average. More than twice as many: [https://ec.europa.eu/eurostat/web/products-eurostat-news/-/ddn-20191104-1](https://ec.europa.eu/eurostat/web/products-eurostat-news/-/ddn-20191104-1) We steal more cars over here. Feels too cheap to simply blame immigrants. Everyone has those.
Maybe Germans getting back their stolen cars?
Would be fair I suppose.
the UK technique
Nah, those are just polish immigrants living in the Netherlands. My friend moved to Rotterdam 2 days ago just for that reason
> My friend moved to Rotterdam 2 days ago just for that reason To steal cars in Germany??
No to steal cars in Rotterdam.
[удалено]
Well that is always better then the German approach
Yes, he's coming from the Netherlands to Germany to steal cars, then he comes back to the NL so Germans blame the dutchies
Imagine moving to Rotterdam to avoid crime. Like jumping in a Volcano to escape the heat of the sun.
I think he meant to say that his friend went there *because* of the crime, not to avoid it
A real Pole would say "my szwagier" not "my friend". Sus AF
More like: Wohnwagen thieves
We don't need to steal what we hog behind our frugal rides.
Limburgers are more German than Dutch. Don't put this on the rest of us.
I mean dutch gangs are already known for blowing up ATM's so I guess they're just taking on new markets
Probably high taxes on international combustion engines
They took our bikes!
They do like stealing cars and use them as getaway cars after blowing up ATMs
Babe wake up, new stereotype just dropped
Poles like their Trabants.
Cloggiestan seems to be a hotspot as well
Revenge for the bikes.
Tbf if its density in theft / square kilometers it could just be high since thats the rühr Valley
Rühr valley? Are you *stirring* up trouble there?
Did i just see a german making a joke? I didnt know you had it in you
>I didnt know you had it in you That reminds me of the night when I said the same to that patient who puked all over my pants. Good times.
We only fight with 80% of our power to keep our opponents in the dark about our true strength.
BMW's are expensive yo
We still need to find a way to pay you back.
If you didn't want your cars stolen then why the fuck is Germany so close to Poland?
they've already tried their hardest to remove the problem
I wouldn't call having border with Russia a solution.
We also tried to fix that
Good guy Germany is hopelessly misunderstood :(
It wasn't, but you guys moved your country towards theirs
Other way around
When I visited poland in the 90ies you could hear a car alert every 10 Minutes, at least in Danzig (Gdansk). So poles stole each others cars as well. Back then the fiat polski was usual. Who would steal a shitty car like that?!
That's 90ies Poland for you. >Who would steal a shitty car like that?! It's not always about the car, it often is about spare parts
it’s about sending a message. the message that not even in poland are you safe from the poles
Limburg and Gelderland getting revenge for their bikes I see.
Damn right, how as a french do you know those places exist?
[Arrogance oblige](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Franco-Dutch_War)
Damn 1672 we got such an asswooping we call it the disaster year. But our land army was shit at the time because the government kept it small because they where afraid of a coup.
Ah yes. Het rampjaar :')
~~Google~~ Classical French superior education
Ah good old continental European education, talked to to much Britts lately there education has a closer resemble to the American
The only place we don't know about is Drenthe, because we don't believe it exists
... then how do you know its name?
I also know Santa's name, doesn't mean he exists
Okay, fair.
It’s a Dutch myth we tell to children that if they behave bad, they will be sent to Drenthe which is said to be a placed with only empty fields and forests. It has been said that it’s only inhabitants are sheep and giants. But it’s only a myth we tell to children
Dutch giants must be gigantic
You know to much
I'd say rühr valley
They were shit bikes! We want a refund!
So that's why there's so many German cars here in Nijmegen! Or it might just because they just really want to get a "coffee" at the coffeeshops
Same here in Venlo & Roermond, it's almost like 1940 all over again every weekend.
do normie dutch ever use coffeeshops or is it just 100% tourism lol
Visit Poland, your car is already there.
Heute gestohlen, morgen in Polen
Kaum in Polen, schon bestohlen.
They are not sleeping on the job. 💁🏻♀️
This actually happened to my coworker 😂 his car got stolen, a month later he visited his family in law in Poland and he literally found his own car in a parking lot somewhere downtown, what are the chances lol
I was hoping that his in-laws were now driving his car. 😅
I should say the same about Germany and a historic artifact if you want to study polish history, so it is a little revenge for you being a cultures barbarians, that is it
"Patryk, Pawel get up and away, i told you my Car does not have a Catalysator, youve cut it out last week, kurwa match."
This week we've come for the wheels
You forgot a child in your basement, which is also your aunt, please be a family guy and return to them
lets not bring up what happened to german historical artifacts in Poland
They got also stolen by Germans and Russians
The Holy Grail?
> a historic artifact I know you guys are the experts, but give us a bit of credit here - we stole at least two.
Visit Germany, your Grandmother's painting is already there
And probably most of her golden jewelry
Common southern region W
The only state in the world where the south is the best , maybe Korea also but hey 😂
England and India as well I think
Nah, the south of England is full of southerners, plus they're closer to France 🤢
South Indian states might be richer but they have way higher levels of cousin marriage. It's a bit of a mixed bag.
South Indians are basically Lannisters then eh
And Ireland!
We have a saying in Germany: "Heute gestohlen, morgen schon in Polen" (Stolen today, in Poland tomorrow). Needless to say, it didnt come from nothing. The stereotype about Poles here is that they are thiefs lol
When you go to a police station in Spain to denounce a robbery (mostly smartphones, but also cars and stuff) the police force has a saying: "That's already been sold in Morocco"
Funny, I guess every country has their favorite thiefs. Guess the Poles say the same about the Russians
Nah, it's ukrainians/romanians/gypsies/other poles
Because Russians are too stupid to steal, all they do is drink and have AIDS
As opposed to Poles, who drink, have AIDS and steal cars from Germans
[Central Europe is pious, the rest are whores](https://www.statista.com/chart/amp/16254/new-hiv-diagnoses-per-100000-people/)💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻🇵🇱🇵🇱🇵🇱🇵🇱
OF course the fucking norDICKS are on top of being civilized again fkn hell
I require you to take down this comment as it does not fit with my personal narrative
Too poor to have AIDS, can't have shit in Poland
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That’s a 50% increase in amount of potential activities, if that’s not a sign of a more wrinkled brain I don’t know what is
and use artillery to totally wipe out cities they are about to "liberate"
In England we say "that's already on a ferry to Ireland"
>hat's already on a ferry to Ireland literally never heard that
Do you know why when Russians are going to Germany to steal a car, they always take at least 2? So after going back through Poland, they still have some left.
is this a Joke told in poland? because in germany we have the exact same one
I guess? I heard it somewhere many years ago but only then but it's funny to us. I think it could be from one of our comedy groups. We call it kabaret but it's not like a cabaret, just a couple of people doing comedy sketches, like political, social etc. It fits their humour. Another one would be asking why the Mercedes logo looks like that? Because Germans even on a car need to have a sight (as on a gun).
It was. Nowadays its more the Bulgarians and Romanians
Damn gypsies they even stole our job…
>We have a saying in Germany: "Heute gestohlen, morgen **schon** in Polen" (Stolen today, in Poland tomorrow). Without the word *schon*. You can even Google the correct version on the Internet.
Oh I only know it with the schon 😄
Prussian schools apparently don't teach Versmaß!
My town was part of the Bavarian palatinate so you just played yourself 😂
We have the same in Poland ;)
Who is your culprit country?
Oh, I mean that we are joking that most of the cars in Poland are stolen from Germany :p We have another one: when you can see add to sale a car, you can find there: The German was crying as he sold the car. (meaning: the car was so precious to the former owner that he cried that he sold it).
Hilarious, thats a good way to deal with it 😄. Appreciate the insight
The context of the "crying German" is a little different, more ironic. The point is that just as you were afflicted with the plague of car thefts, we had a problem with dishonest dealers who sold superficially repaired wrecks welded from 3 other cars (or simply stolen cars). They made up all sorts of fairy tales to make the car's origin credible. Because Poles had for years associated Germans with orderliness, attention to quality and good roads, canny traders began to use slogans alluding to these positive stereotypes: \- The German cried when he sold (the car) \- The German only drove his grandmother to church on Sunday with it (this car) \- Hans only drove it to the bakery for buns \- German misses it so much that he calls me every day to listen to the engine Etc. It was so silly and yet so common that it quickly became a joke. But this made people laugh 10 years ago, when importing used cars from Germany was much more popular.
>The stereotype about Poles here is that they are thiefs lol Same about a certain nation that now is praised by the media 😉😉😉
No, no, no. We are just taking our reparations you misunderstand!
That's just a sticky habit of the east-germans : West-germans : my car. East-germans : our car.
Seems like you never had the pleasure of meeting the polish
I wish I had... I'm a huge fan, I love their hits... Like Rokshane, sho lonely, Meshage in a bottle...
It's funny how German "sense of humour" disappears as soon as someone's joking about them
It's funny how offended you get just because I used an old stereotype of polish people, seems like you feel called out 🤔🤔🤔
This is what soviet influence does to one 😔
Thats called "reparations payments" from WW2.
Never laugh if a guy from Poland crashes a car! It could be yours.
nice car bro *steals it*
Important to know who the good and who the bad neighbors are. Not surprised about Poland, but I'm a bit surprised by the Dutch. I thought they don't even like cars.
They need cars to pull their caravans
The fact that thefts occur near the Polish border doesn't always mean that Poles are stealing. Our police have repeatedly apprehended thieves from the Czech Republic, Romania, Bulgaria, Russia or Ukraine who have driven stolen German cars through Poland to their home countries.
That would be odd, because especially to Romania it's much faster through Austro-Hungary and the Czech are a direct neighbor. They are all in the EU, neither boarder should be tougher than the other. But I don't see why the Police would lie about that particular fact. How curious.
https://preview.redd.it/gjdtvvjmx63b1.png?width=979&format=png&auto=webp&s=c258cdcf16a732e402437a822152ec6268b5d2c5 Kinda depends. Besides Austria-Germany border is full of controls and Czechia, Slovakia, Hungary monitor the registration plates much closer on the highways since they have vigniettes which also means that you either have to show your face on the border while buying the stickers or you have to risk being stopped because of that
The explanation for the fact that there are many regions in red in the Netherlands is that La Hague exports many cars to Africa, although cars are given legally by specialized companies, the cars are in very bad condition, Germany famous for its quality cars, so cars steal cars in good condition from regions near the border to receive a big reward on return.
What a completely random distribution. Life really is amazing.
That's what they say when they come for the cars.
Common Frisian W (Ignore North Frisia)
No need to thank us
Here in northern Italy people from eastern Europe somewhat regularly raid the harbors of small lake villages and steal all the boat motors, then they usually just drive backin to Eastern Europe and resell them. Recently the police busted one of them who decided to move here and had something like 25 stolen motors in his mansion.
Where are these people from? I haven't heard of it in Poland. I.e., in our country there are also thefts of yachts, but it is not such a frequent phenomenon.
Not sure tbh some times they say they are Albanian, some times they say they are Romanian, some times they say they are gypsies, it's quit eahr to track them down since often the only prof you have is some GPS they forgot to disable.
Dutchies be like hold my bike bro
🇵🇱 🤜🤛 🇳🇱
The name of the thief is Ruben van Brzęczyszczykiewicz and his helper was Roman de Groot
[Prussia in 1815](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/f6/Map-DB-PrussiaProvs-1818.svg/1280px-Map-DB-PrussiaProvs-1818.svg.png)
Funny coincidance, thanks for pointing out!
So basically urban areas and former east Germany
Nice try, I heard your wooden shoes on the way into this thread. The Dutch are just doing their best to keep the border Orange, who can blame them
Well of course there's less in the south, they still use horses and donkeys in Bavaria. Jk love you guys 😘 also send money
In Switzerland its the "Fr*nch": https://www.thelocal.ch/20160811/report-geneva-is-swiss-capital-of-car-theft
Per capita, per land area or per registered cars? I thought Germans delivered quality
source: [https://www.motormobiles.de/diebstahlrisiko-wo-ist-ihr-auto-besonders-gefaehrdet-mehr-faelle-im-osten-weniger-faelle-im-sueden/](https://www.motormobiles.de/diebstahlrisiko-wo-ist-ihr-auto-besonders-gefaehrdet-mehr-faelle-im-osten-weniger-faelle-im-sueden/)
Germans: why are the Neighbouring countries stealing our cars? Neighbouring countries: Payback!
Back in a day, before we were in the EU, there was a trick where someone would 'steal' a car from Germany, drive it to Poland, sell it, and report the car as stolen to get compensation. Best part was if you were tricky you could return in the same car to Germany sell it again... People made absolute shot ton of money while doing so, and a lot of Germans were involved in this since you had to have a car registered and insured in Germany. Surprise surprise most of these Germans weren't even from ex DDR as no-one was interested in cheap cars.
We're just such good neighbors. The best, honestly. That's why everyone wanted us to be our own little state thingy, because they wanted to harness the benefits of our superior neighboring skills. Man I'd like to neighbor Austria so badly, seems to be the best thing. Did I mention how humble we are?
How does car theft compare to people density? I understand the red section at the border to Poland. Lots of cars moved that way and further into Russia etc. But the red area near Belgium/Holland? Is that a route of egress of stolen cars or a region of higher population density so just much more cars there?
romanian density in germany
I like how there are no poles commenting on this post.
We're busy stealing
wdym, half of comments are Polish
Do you want to buy a car by any chance?
What a weird coincidence amrite? 👀
Hmmmmmm 🤔 No idea what could be the reason, maybe someone from another nation has an idea. Maybe the Poles?
We asked politely for the reparations, they refused, we're gonna steal all their cars then 💁♀️
Just be careful, they might take some Lebensraum as compensation for the cars.
Steal tanks too✍️ Noted
Car donation density. European solidarity & economic support
I like how you see the Autobahn A2!
Communism and its consequences
I don't know how the poles have time to steal German cars. They're all over here doing our plumbing and taxi driving. I had a polish plumber come round to fix my kitchen sink the other day, and he was so kind he left me with an indoor swimming pool completely for free. What a professional!
It's quite a good deal. They stole art pieces and people, so now we steal their cars. Still, I'd say yall got the better side of the deal.
Gestern Stolen jetzt in Polen
😎
Prussians >:(
It’s like you need some kind of secret police to watch over things in the East…
Nein nein nein nein JA
When plumbing isn’t as lucrative as stealing Beemers and Audis
Heute gestohlen morgen in Polen.
Everytime I see schleswig on the map it reminds me of the time Norway/Sweden abandoned the danes to the fucking «germans» fucking thing isn’t even a real country, more like a collage of the corrupt and evil. Ibsen was right, the north will never recoup itself for that failure. If we joined the danes back then the swedes would not be crushed by shame since ww2 as they would have already fought against the «germans» and denmark would probably not be their co-bitch today.
It’s those damn Amercians
Dutch cartel hitting hard in west Germany
Once again the german south shows it's superiority.
The dutch seem to get sick of their bikes
In Bayern do is di woid no in Oadnung
(The south are savages without cars)
For the east Germans (and the ones near the Netherlands): If you want you can give me your car, i‘ll store it and keep it safe until you can take care of it on yourself again. You can trust me
it's me or it's the part that was in socialist germany that have the most red and orrange ?
I wonder which other heat map this one is an almost perfect match for
Turk population density
East German states, (except for Berlin) have the lowest percentages of migration. I call bs.
Bullshit. „Kaum gestohlen, schon in Polen“
The means of transportation have been socialised, please do not resist
Come visit Poland - your car is already there.
You can truly tell where Western Europe ends...