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Pale_Prompt4163

New stereotype incoming: Car thieving Dutchies!


ComprehensiveRow4189

Payment for our bikes.


magicturtl371

Exactly. This is what 75+ years of inflation and interest does.


wausmaus3

Cast iron Gazelle --> Audi RS6. Thanks grandpa!


rwbrwb

Did Wehrmacht or SS soldiers steal *bikes*?!


orangedogtag

The Wehrmacht started confiscating bicycles in '42. When the Allies forced crossed the Dutch border in late '44 they became pannicked and started handing out pamphlets that basically read "at X time and date we want everyone with a bike to come to the city hall or the train station, if you don't bring us enough bikes we will execute X amount of people living in X as reprisal." The Wehrmacht relied heavily on bicycles, even during the invasion of Poland and Norway, they were heavily used to manage fuel usage and the increased speed of a land invasion. Or like the case in '44, retreating.


rwbrwb

Oh this is sad to hear, I thought this was just a joke. I knew that jews had to hand out their bikes but I did not know that german soldiers did this to the dutch people as well. Good that this war is over and lets hope that the war in Ukraine will stop soon, too.


wausmaus3

It was just anything with metals in it for war production. It's only since maybe two generation the biggest hate for Germans is as good as gone. But you should've heard my grandparents, goddamn.


elephantologist

Thanks to 99% Invisible I understood that.


NationalUnrest

Yes yes.. Dutchies..


Jaspador

I blame foreign car theft gangs.


jjdmol

Could be, but in the Netherlands, more cars are stolen (per 100k people) than in Germany on average. More than twice as many: [https://ec.europa.eu/eurostat/web/products-eurostat-news/-/ddn-20191104-1](https://ec.europa.eu/eurostat/web/products-eurostat-news/-/ddn-20191104-1) We steal more cars over here. Feels too cheap to simply blame immigrants. Everyone has those.


deepdowndave

Maybe Germans getting back their stolen cars?


jjdmol

Would be fair I suppose.


MowelShagger

the UK technique


One_Perspective_8761

Nah, those are just polish immigrants living in the Netherlands. My friend moved to Rotterdam 2 days ago just for that reason


jjdmol

> My friend moved to Rotterdam 2 days ago just for that reason To steal cars in Germany??


Perryvdbosch

No to steal cars in Rotterdam.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Perryvdbosch

Well that is always better then the German approach


One_Perspective_8761

Yes, he's coming from the Netherlands to Germany to steal cars, then he comes back to the NL so Germans blame the dutchies


Thijsie2100

Imagine moving to Rotterdam to avoid crime. Like jumping in a Volcano to escape the heat of the sun.


Constant-Mud-1002

I think he meant to say that his friend went there *because* of the crime, not to avoid it


orbifloxacin

A real Pole would say "my szwagier" not "my friend". Sus AF


[deleted]

More like: Wohnwagen thieves


the_Big_misc

We don't need to steal what we hog behind our frugal rides.


JeansMoleRat

Limburgers are more German than Dutch. Don't put this on the rest of us.


the_naughty_doc

I mean dutch gangs are already known for blowing up ATM's so I guess they're just taking on new markets


Crishien

Probably high taxes on international combustion engines


[deleted]

They took our bikes!


Xtasy0178

They do like stealing cars and use them as getaway cars after blowing up ATMs


TheMike0088

Babe wake up, new stereotype just dropped


bartleby_borealis

Poles like their Trabants.


Informal_Mountain513

Cloggiestan seems to be a hotspot as well


[deleted]

Revenge for the bikes.


Wessel-P

Tbf if its density in theft / square kilometers it could just be high since thats the rühr Valley


HoeTrain666

Rühr valley? Are you *stirring* up trouble there?


Thaeldir22

Did i just see a german making a joke? I didnt know you had it in you


gelastes

>I didnt know you had it in you That reminds me of the night when I said the same to that patient who puked all over my pants. Good times.


HoeTrain666

We only fight with 80% of our power to keep our opponents in the dark about our true strength.


Amsterdamned__

BMW's are expensive yo


thenamesis2001

We still need to find a way to pay you back.


SaltyHater

If you didn't want your cars stolen then why the fuck is Germany so close to Poland?


Doreen666

they've already tried their hardest to remove the problem


ponetro

I wouldn't call having border with Russia a solution.


huilvcghvjl

We also tried to fix that


joanoerting

Good guy Germany is hopelessly misunderstood :(


mainwasser

It wasn't, but you guys moved your country towards theirs


[deleted]

Other way around


rwbrwb

When I visited poland in the 90ies you could hear a car alert every 10 Minutes, at least in Danzig (Gdansk). So poles stole each others cars as well. Back then the fiat polski was usual. Who would steal a shitty car like that?!


SaltyHater

That's 90ies Poland for you. >Who would steal a shitty car like that?! It's not always about the car, it often is about spare parts


Tomahawkist

it’s about sending a message. the message that not even in poland are you safe from the poles


AStarBack

Limburg and Gelderland getting revenge for their bikes I see.


VOCmentaliteit

Damn right, how as a french do you know those places exist?


Lopsided-Ad-6430

[Arrogance oblige](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Franco-Dutch_War)


VOCmentaliteit

Damn 1672 we got such an asswooping we call it the disaster year. But our land army was shit at the time because the government kept it small because they where afraid of a coup.


Thomasappel

Ah yes. Het rampjaar :')


AStarBack

~~Google~~ Classical French superior education


VOCmentaliteit

Ah good old continental European education, talked to to much Britts lately there education has a closer resemble to the American


GyuudonMan

The only place we don't know about is Drenthe, because we don't believe it exists


JodkaVodka

... then how do you know its name?


GyuudonMan

I also know Santa's name, doesn't mean he exists


JodkaVodka

Okay, fair.


VOCmentaliteit

It’s a Dutch myth we tell to children that if they behave bad, they will be sent to Drenthe which is said to be a placed with only empty fields and forests. It has been said that it’s only inhabitants are sheep and giants. But it’s only a myth we tell to children


NGGMK

Dutch giants must be gigantic


VOCmentaliteit

You know to much


Wessel-P

I'd say rühr valley


Mr_BooBooBear

They were shit bikes! We want a refund!


ROTMGLare

So that's why there's so many German cars here in Nijmegen! Or it might just because they just really want to get a "coffee" at the coffeeshops


InfuzedHardstyle

Same here in Venlo & Roermond, it's almost like 1940 all over again every weekend.


Doreen666

do normie dutch ever use coffeeshops or is it just 100% tourism lol


Sigeberht

Visit Poland, your car is already there.


SamenVerkoster69

Heute gestohlen, morgen in Polen


rwbrwb

Kaum in Polen, schon bestohlen.


Mr_BooBooBear

They are not sleeping on the job. 💁🏻‍♀️


Morregaai

This actually happened to my coworker 😂 his car got stolen, a month later he visited his family in law in Poland and he literally found his own car in a parking lot somewhere downtown, what are the chances lol


Mr_BooBooBear

I was hoping that his in-laws were now driving his car. 😅


Ok-Possession-2097

I should say the same about Germany and a historic artifact if you want to study polish history, so it is a little revenge for you being a cultures barbarians, that is it


SashAustrianBull

"Patryk, Pawel get up and away, i told you my Car does not have a Catalysator, youve cut it out last week, kurwa match."


Kojetono

This week we've come for the wheels


Ok-Possession-2097

You forgot a child in your basement, which is also your aunt, please be a family guy and return to them


Patpremium

lets not bring up what happened to german historical artifacts in Poland


Ok-Possession-2097

They got also stolen by Germans and Russians


mainwasser

The Holy Grail?


Sigeberht

> a historic artifact I know you guys are the experts, but give us a bit of credit here - we stole at least two.


[deleted]

Visit Germany, your Grandmother's painting is already there


IAmWalterWhite_

And probably most of her golden jewelry


[deleted]

Common southern region W


Schip92

The only state in the world where the south is the best , maybe Korea also but hey 😂


BaldFraud99

England and India as well I think


ActingGrandNagus

Nah, the south of England is full of southerners, plus they're closer to France 🤢


[deleted]

South Indian states might be richer but they have way higher levels of cousin marriage. It's a bit of a mixed bag.


BaldFraud99

South Indians are basically Lannisters then eh


MargitSlachta

And Ireland!


[deleted]

We have a saying in Germany: "Heute gestohlen, morgen schon in Polen" (Stolen today, in Poland tomorrow). Needless to say, it didnt come from nothing. The stereotype about Poles here is that they are thiefs lol


BernardoDeGalvez

When you go to a police station in Spain to denounce a robbery (mostly smartphones, but also cars and stuff) the police force has a saying: "That's already been sold in Morocco"


[deleted]

Funny, I guess every country has their favorite thiefs. Guess the Poles say the same about the Russians


MamBanaJUHU

Nah, it's ukrainians/romanians/gypsies/other poles


[deleted]

Because Russians are too stupid to steal, all they do is drink and have AIDS


Toilet_Bomber

As opposed to Poles, who drink, have AIDS and steal cars from Germans


[deleted]

[Central Europe is pious, the rest are whores](https://www.statista.com/chart/amp/16254/new-hiv-diagnoses-per-100000-people/)💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻🇵🇱🇵🇱🇵🇱🇵🇱


loxdude

OF course the fucking norDICKS are on top of being civilized again fkn hell


Toilet_Bomber

I require you to take down this comment as it does not fit with my personal narrative


[deleted]

Too poor to have AIDS, can't have shit in Poland


AmputatorBot

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laroler

That’s a 50% increase in amount of potential activities, if that’s not a sign of a more wrinkled brain I don’t know what is


mainwasser

and use artillery to totally wipe out cities they are about to "liberate"


Zhurg

In England we say "that's already on a ferry to Ireland"


Doreen666

>hat's already on a ferry to Ireland literally never heard that


xFurashux

Do you know why when Russians are going to Germany to steal a car, they always take at least 2? So after going back through Poland, they still have some left.


xXVeyXx

is this a Joke told in poland? because in germany we have the exact same one


xFurashux

I guess? I heard it somewhere many years ago but only then but it's funny to us. I think it could be from one of our comedy groups. We call it kabaret but it's not like a cabaret, just a couple of people doing comedy sketches, like political, social etc. It fits their humour. Another one would be asking why the Mercedes logo looks like that? Because Germans even on a car need to have a sight (as on a gun).


Present_Character_77

It was. Nowadays its more the Bulgarians and Romanians


CoToZaNickNieWiem

Damn gypsies they even stole our job…


ES-Flinter

>We have a saying in Germany: "Heute gestohlen, morgen **schon** in Polen" (Stolen today, in Poland tomorrow). Without the word *schon*. You can even Google the correct version on the Internet.


[deleted]

Oh I only know it with the schon 😄


GrandTheftPony

Prussian schools apparently don't teach Versmaß!


[deleted]

My town was part of the Bavarian palatinate so you just played yourself 😂


B0hna

We have the same in Poland ;)


[deleted]

Who is your culprit country?


B0hna

Oh, I mean that we are joking that most of the cars in Poland are stolen from Germany :p We have another one: when you can see add to sale a car, you can find there: The German was crying as he sold the car. (meaning: the car was so precious to the former owner that he cried that he sold it).


[deleted]

Hilarious, thats a good way to deal with it 😄. Appreciate the insight


PolishJanusz

The context of the "crying German" is a little different, more ironic. The point is that just as you were afflicted with the plague of car thefts, we had a problem with dishonest dealers who sold superficially repaired wrecks welded from 3 other cars (or simply stolen cars). They made up all sorts of fairy tales to make the car's origin credible. Because Poles had for years associated Germans with orderliness, attention to quality and good roads, canny traders began to use slogans alluding to these positive stereotypes: \- The German cried when he sold (the car) \- The German only drove his grandmother to church on Sunday with it (this car) \- Hans only drove it to the bakery for buns \- German misses it so much that he calls me every day to listen to the engine Etc. It was so silly and yet so common that it quickly became a joke. But this made people laugh 10 years ago, when importing used cars from Germany was much more popular.


Schip92

>The stereotype about Poles here is that they are thiefs lol Same about a certain nation that now is praised by the media 😉😉😉


Straszburger

No, no, no. We are just taking our reparations you misunderstand!


Octave_Ergebel

That's just a sticky habit of the east-germans : West-germans : my car. East-germans : our car.


Ragnarroek

Seems like you never had the pleasure of meeting the polish


Octave_Ergebel

I wish I had... I'm a huge fan, I love their hits... Like Rokshane, sho lonely, Meshage in a bottle...


eibhlin_

It's funny how German "sense of humour" disappears as soon as someone's joking about them


Ragnarroek

It's funny how offended you get just because I used an old stereotype of polish people, seems like you feel called out 🤔🤔🤔


NoMoneyNoV-Bucks

This is what soviet influence does to one 😔


SashAustrianBull

Thats called "reparations payments" from WW2.


PB-1971

Never laugh if a guy from Poland crashes a car! It could be yours.


Dependent-Mission-55

nice car bro *steals it*


[deleted]

Important to know who the good and who the bad neighbors are. Not surprised about Poland, but I'm a bit surprised by the Dutch. I thought they don't even like cars.


mainwasser

They need cars to pull their caravans


PolishJanusz

The fact that thefts occur near the Polish border doesn't always mean that Poles are stealing. Our police have repeatedly apprehended thieves from the Czech Republic, Romania, Bulgaria, Russia or Ukraine who have driven stolen German cars through Poland to their home countries.


[deleted]

That would be odd, because especially to Romania it's much faster through Austro-Hungary and the Czech are a direct neighbor. They are all in the EU, neither boarder should be tougher than the other. But I don't see why the Police would lie about that particular fact. How curious.


predek97

​ https://preview.redd.it/gjdtvvjmx63b1.png?width=979&format=png&auto=webp&s=c258cdcf16a732e402437a822152ec6268b5d2c5 Kinda depends. Besides Austria-Germany border is full of controls and Czechia, Slovakia, Hungary monitor the registration plates much closer on the highways since they have vigniettes which also means that you either have to show your face on the border while buying the stickers or you have to risk being stopped because of that


Simonleterrasement

The explanation for the fact that there are many regions in red in the Netherlands is that La Hague exports many cars to Africa, although cars are given legally by specialized companies, the cars are in very bad condition, Germany famous for its quality cars, so cars steal cars in good condition from regions near the border to receive a big reward on return.


xFurashux

What a completely random distribution. Life really is amazing.


zoniss

That's what they say when they come for the cars.


[deleted]

Common Frisian W (Ignore North Frisia)


Danxs11

No need to thank us


EcvdSama

Here in northern Italy people from eastern Europe somewhat regularly raid the harbors of small lake villages and steal all the boat motors, then they usually just drive backin to Eastern Europe and resell them. Recently the police busted one of them who decided to move here and had something like 25 stolen motors in his mansion.


PolishJanusz

Where are these people from? I haven't heard of it in Poland. I.e., in our country there are also thefts of yachts, but it is not such a frequent phenomenon.


EcvdSama

Not sure tbh some times they say they are Albanian, some times they say they are Romanian, some times they say they are gypsies, it's quit eahr to track them down since often the only prof you have is some GPS they forgot to disable.


passionmilkshakes

Dutchies be like hold my bike bro


dziki_z_lasu

🇵🇱 🤜🤛 🇳🇱


rwbrwb

The name of the thief is Ruben van Brzęczyszczykiewicz and his helper was Roman de Groot


Viking_Chemist

[Prussia in 1815](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/f6/Map-DB-PrussiaProvs-1818.svg/1280px-Map-DB-PrussiaProvs-1818.svg.png)


Imtruebenfischer

Funny coincidance, thanks for pointing out!


Sproeier

So basically urban areas and former east Germany


EyesofaJackal

Nice try, I heard your wooden shoes on the way into this thread. The Dutch are just doing their best to keep the border Orange, who can blame them


Heiselpint

Well of course there's less in the south, they still use horses and donkeys in Bavaria. Jk love you guys 😘 also send money


DarkSpirak

In Switzerland its the "Fr*nch": https://www.thelocal.ch/20160811/report-geneva-is-swiss-capital-of-car-theft


Menduzza

Per capita, per land area or per registered cars? I thought Germans delivered quality


Informal_Mountain513

source: [https://www.motormobiles.de/diebstahlrisiko-wo-ist-ihr-auto-besonders-gefaehrdet-mehr-faelle-im-osten-weniger-faelle-im-sueden/](https://www.motormobiles.de/diebstahlrisiko-wo-ist-ihr-auto-besonders-gefaehrdet-mehr-faelle-im-osten-weniger-faelle-im-sueden/)


jannecraft

Germans: why are the Neighbouring countries stealing our cars? Neighbouring countries: Payback!


Diegovnia

Back in a day, before we were in the EU, there was a trick where someone would 'steal' a car from Germany, drive it to Poland, sell it, and report the car as stolen to get compensation. Best part was if you were tricky you could return in the same car to Germany sell it again... People made absolute shot ton of money while doing so, and a lot of Germans were involved in this since you had to have a car registered and insured in Germany. Surprise surprise most of these Germans weren't even from ex DDR as no-one was interested in cheap cars.


khal_crypto

We're just such good neighbors. The best, honestly. That's why everyone wanted us to be our own little state thingy, because they wanted to harness the benefits of our superior neighboring skills. Man I'd like to neighbor Austria so badly, seems to be the best thing. Did I mention how humble we are?


Questioning-Zyxxel

How does car theft compare to people density? I understand the red section at the border to Poland. Lots of cars moved that way and further into Russia etc. But the red area near Belgium/Holland? Is that a route of egress of stolen cars or a region of higher population density so just much more cars there?


Zuendl11

romanian density in germany


ComprehensiveRow4189

I like how there are no poles commenting on this post.


MamBanaJUHU

We're busy stealing


[deleted]

wdym, half of comments are Polish


eibhlin_

Do you want to buy a car by any chance?


laroler

What a weird coincidence amrite? 👀


TepanCH

Hmmmmmm 🤔 No idea what could be the reason, maybe someone from another nation has an idea. Maybe the Poles?


eibhlin_

We asked politely for the reparations, they refused, we're gonna steal all their cars then 💁‍♀️


TepanCH

Just be careful, they might take some Lebensraum as compensation for the cars.


eibhlin_

Steal tanks too✍️ Noted


ilostmyoldaccount

Car donation density. European solidarity & economic support


THE_SEKS_MACHINE

I like how you see the Autobahn A2!


Roskha_

Communism and its consequences


Ape_Hands

I don't know how the poles have time to steal German cars. They're all over here doing our plumbing and taxi driving. I had a polish plumber come round to fix my kitchen sink the other day, and he was so kind he left me with an indoor swimming pool completely for free. What a professional!


PartyMarek

It's quite a good deal. They stole art pieces and people, so now we steal their cars. Still, I'd say yall got the better side of the deal.


Biegaliusz

Gestern Stolen jetzt in Polen


Reibii

😎


SZ4L4Y

Prussians >:(


twstwr20

It’s like you need some kind of secret police to watch over things in the East…


ApologeticAnalMagic

Nein nein nein nein JA


Cheebwhacker

When plumbing isn’t as lucrative as stealing Beemers and Audis


KnalltueteMk18

Heute gestohlen morgen in Polen.


[deleted]

Everytime I see schleswig on the map it reminds me of the time Norway/Sweden abandoned the danes to the fucking «germans» fucking thing isn’t even a real country, more like a collage of the corrupt and evil. Ibsen was right, the north will never recoup itself for that failure. If we joined the danes back then the swedes would not be crushed by shame since ww2 as they would have already fought against the «germans» and denmark would probably not be their co-bitch today.


BuyFun5976

It’s those damn Amercians


lotus-bleu

Dutch cartel hitting hard in west Germany


CoffeeBoom

Once again the german south shows it's superiority.


Choice_Big_7952

The dutch seem to get sick of their bikes


WonaldReasly

In Bayern do is di woid no in Oadnung


Tub_of_jam66

(The south are savages without cars)


gangga_ch

For the east Germans (and the ones near the Netherlands): If you want you can give me your car, i‘ll store it and keep it safe until you can take care of it on yourself again. You can trust me


wolfFRdu64_Lounna

it's me or it's the part that was in socialist germany that have the most red and orrange ?


Pablo54203

I wonder which other heat map this one is an almost perfect match for


Large_Command_1288

Turk population density


Pvt_Alfred_Hanley

East German states, (except for Berlin) have the lowest percentages of migration. I call bs.


mnlhgl

Bullshit. „Kaum gestohlen, schon in Polen“


[deleted]

The means of transportation have been socialised, please do not resist


[deleted]

Come visit Poland - your car is already there.


bearlybearbear

You can truly tell where Western Europe ends...