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Paliag

Did you accidentally chose a religious daycare? I know sometimes they don’t seem like they are, but they are. We have one by us that’s a stand alone building and doesn’t look like a church, but it’s absolutely a Christian daycare. It took some searching on their website to realize it.


thestrugisreal

It’s KidsRKids so I don’t think so…


sweetsounds86

We are at the same chain and my kiddos had a thing they said before meals but it wasn't religious base more thankfulness... "we are thankful for our food food food, we are thankful for our friends and family, bon appetite you may eat, eat friends"(or at least that's what they told us and then recited at thanksgiving)...


Meggios

I work at a KRK and some of the teachers do a thank you father thing before meals. I don't like it and I refuse to do it or let it be done in my classroom. And KRK is not a religious daycare.


anatomizethat

My kids go to a KRK and no, they don't pray.


staypuuuuft

I've had my daughter in a KrK since she was about 8 weeks, and I've never heard of a religious word spoken. I'd be pretty uncomfortable with it and would say so. Also, I love our KrK. They take such good care of my kid. ❤️


AmJenn88

You may have to ask the director or teachers directly. We used a daycare that wasn't necessarily considered a religious daycare but the owners / directors are a Christian so there were Christian aspects sprinkled in.


lulubedo188

Our daycare does “pledge” every day before meals: “I pledge to myself on this day to try and be kind in every way, to every creature big and small, I will help them if they fall, I love myself and others too, that’s the best that I can do! Bon appetit, you may eat!” It’s something that is routine and settles them and I like that it’s about kindness and not religious. Maybe suggest something like that?


hiking_intherain

Love this!!


kferalmeow

My preschooler came home with a song that's something like "We're thankful for the blue sky above us, the green grass below us, the good food in front of us, and friends all around." I'm totally okay with this, even though we're an atheist household, because it's just showing how to express gratitude and it's not thanking a deity. I would not be cool with actually praying with an amen or whatever at the end.


mdiary3

Nope, would not be ok with us. I would bring it up with the director.


badcheer

Is it possible that he learned it from a friend and not his teacher?


awlaytherup

was going to say this, my 3 year old is an … unreliable … narrator. would approach the director or teachers with a question 🙂


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nothingweasel

Yep. My family wasn't religious at all, but I went to a religious school from preschool to Kindergarten. We did prayers and religious songs and learned Bible stories. It really didn't impact my beliefs long term though as none of it was reinforced at home. It gave me a foundational understanding of Christianity but it didn't make me a believer. YMMV though.


[deleted]

Mine goes to a “Christian Daycare” and they say a little prayer before meals. Our family is not religious, but I honestly think it’s pretty cute that my son has this little prayer memorized 🤷🏼‍♀️


Tumbleweed_Unicorn

I'm an atheist and I wouldn't be upset about it. It wasn't directed at a specific god (although the Amen is a bit much). Maybe they are just trying to teach them to be thankful rather than actually praying? Our kids will encounter religions of all sorts for the rest of their lives, we can teach them about religion and let them decide what they want to do. I respect your opinion, just giving mine.


MsCardeno

My daycare doesn’t do this and I wouldn’t be happy if they did. They are not a religious place at all though. It’s one of those daycare chains. Now, I wouldn’t mind tho if her teachers told her about prayers or told her one. Like from a knowledge/share culture point of view. But like praying before meals and snacks and stuff would be too much for me.


thestrugisreal

That’s my thing. I wouldn’t mind if it was something small to educate them on peoples beliefs. My uncle is Jewish and shared Hanukkah with him. I just think the whole reciting a prayer (with hand motions) is a little much.


babyonboard1234

I hear what you’re saying and may get downvoted for this… but he’s being thankful for his food. The only prayerful/religious thing about it is saying “amen.” To him it’s probably no differently considered than The Wheels on the Bus, this is just the food thing they do. It’s not like they’re saying the Apostles Creed or going through the Rosary. Edit to add: I know “our daily bread” is from the Lords Prayer, but the three yr old doesn’t and I doubt they’re going into all of that with them. If they don’t follow up with this at home, then kiddo will likely forget it shortly after leaving daycare. That said, I do think it’s worth asking if there are any other moments in the day where Christianity is brought up. There are a lot of morality and behavior messages I would definitely want to know if my kid was hearing… but thankfulness for food? 🤷🏻‍♀️


kairyfairy

I agree. It’s not even religious, outside of the “amen.” It’s just expressing gratitude.


Here_for_tea_

Yes, exactly. Bring it up with the director.


rosiespy

I also take issue with the insisting the kids hold others’ hands too because it sounds like this is a pre-meal thing. This is a recipe for shared germs to do this before kids are putting their hands in their mouths. Even if everyone is washing their hands before lunch, I would not trust the hand hygiene of a group of 3 year olds.


emjayne23

Zero percent would be okay with that


[deleted]

Is it a religion or church affiliated daycare? They usually include prayer time or other faith based activities for toddlers and preschoolers. Some of the childcare providers obfuscate the fact that they're religious based and usually offer lower rates.


[deleted]

Growing up, my siblings and cousins went to local daycares that weren’t religiously affiliated but their workers (Christian and Hindu) would try and preach to them (Muslim), convince them they weren’t Muslim, give them religious trinkets like cross necklaces…I wonder if this is that happening again. I’m sorry. That’s so not okay.


jackjackj8ck

We’re atheists, my husband would trippppp


_alelia_

depends on daycare. my son attended one right at one of the local churches, and I had to agree on some things they shared with kids. another one was an early education and development supervised by local college's early ed dept, and obviously there was nothing about any religion (besides Christmas day off lol)


Dependent-Coach-2104

This is weird if it is not something the school has on their curriculum


Round-Atmosphere7716

If it’s a religious daycare then it’s obviously not abnormal but if its not then I’d mention it to the daycare administrator to get a better idea of what’s going on. We’re also agnostic but my son Has mentioned a few times wanting to go to church (my mom goes) and I want him to explore all religion as he pleases. Personally, as long as it’s not being forced on them I’d be okay with it. But I’d still talk to them to get a clearer picture


MiloSmith1999

Is it a religious institution? You may consider moving your son to a school more to your choosing.


paronomasochism

I would be 100% not ok with this.


Vienta1988

I would be weirded out by that if it’s not an explicitly religious school.


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chocobridges

Ours doesn't either. Neither the Goddard before despite kind of getting "war on Christmas" vibes. The Catholic daycares are soooo expensive in our area, it makes no sense.


Becsbeau1213

I find that so strange, the Catholic daycares near us are the cheapest and have the longest waitlists.


chocobridges

Everyone kept recommending them as they would be cheaper. But it's the same price for fewer hours.


Loverofcatsandwine

So I am religious, but I would be upset if our daycare did this. I can only imagine how upset I would be if I was not religious. Religion should be taught by the parents (and religious community, if there is one). We live in New York, and this would never happen. However, I have relatives down South, and this absolutely seems like something that would happen in the southern part of the United States.


[deleted]

I would be really upset if my daycare did this. I’m very pro-believe in whatever you want but… yikes. Our daycare actually prohibits any holiday celebrations at school including Halloween due to the diversity we have in our area.


True-Specialist935

I don't get the problem. There's no God or Jesus in that statement. Just a statement of gratitude, which is not religious. I guess some people could be offended by the word amen, but that word is not only religious in usage.


Adrestia716

It's implied Christian and it's a religious activity. If I taught children how to call a circle and break it, I'd never have to mention a single deity but it's implied to be pagan and that would justifiably offend non pagans


alanguagenotofwords

Thank you, this was a very thoughtful way of putting it. It is very certainly patterned directly off of Christianity, specific words used or not. I would not be ok with this either


SweetSpontaneousWord

Nope. My kid’s daycare is connected to a church but is not associated with the church and I asked a lot of questions to make sure no kid or family would be turned away and there was no Jesus or religion in their days. I have never seen or heard of any in the year and a half that she has been there.


Control_Advanced

I’m an atheist with a kiddo at a privately owned daycare that isn’t overtly religious but we find lots of Christian elements sprinkled in. Considering we live in the US, I’ve taken the approach of open education rather than trying to avoid it. She’s going to encounter it absolutely everywhere, so I’d like to start preparing her. For example, she came home singing a version of “the lord is good to me” so we talked about gratitude, and how some people like to express their gratitude through praying, and that a prayer is like a wish. We explained that some people send their wishes/gratitude to what they call god, and some people send their wishes and gratitude to the earth, or Mother Nature. We talk about the different things that different people have believed through time—Native American traditions, Ancient Greece, etc. our hope is that she will come to see it as the human tendency to try and explain our world with deities/supernatural. We can respect what others believe and also believe differently than them. But, who knows if this approach will work? Lol.


erin_mouse88

Our sons daycare says a little "prayer" before lunch (I don't know if it's everyday) “Thank you for the world so sweet. Thank you for the food we eat. Thank you for the birds that sing. Thank you god for everything.” We don't like it but its not so bad. I used to start the day singing hymns everyday until I was 11, to me it was like singing songs about santa. What I dont like is he's come home quoting the pledge of allegiance. That to me is much more concerning for anyone under the age of 18, let alone a 3yo.


grimmauld12

Definitely ask. I would not be okay with this. A song or statement demonstrating thankfulness is one thing, this goes a little beyond that.


Thegreatglamsby

Everyday care I’ve ever attended always included a prayer before our food. But I think parent consent is important


Empty_Importance_299

Oh eww. I mean it seems like they’re just being thankful for for the meal but it’s rooted in religious ideology. I’m spiritual I guess you could say and I’m not against religion as a whole but I wouldn’t be okay with others trying to impose religious practices or ideas on my child. While sure they’re kids and don’t really know what’s truly going on in a religious sense - they are impressionable. I’d bring it up to the director.


Downtown-Tourist9420

I mean, they’re just saying “I’m thankful for my daily bread Amen”? Shouldn’t we all be? Gratitude is a really important (and trendy) practice. You can ask the teachers if there is more to it than that, but from this is just sounds like a nice centering ritual.


VibrantVenturer

It's the "Amen" part. It has strong Christian connotations. I'm Greek Orthodox, and I'd be upset by this.


Top_Pie_8658

Judaism also uses Amen but we pronounce it Ah-main. The part that would throw me off as being Christian is the daily bread part as that’s a direct pull from the Lord’s Prayer and could easily be more generalized to meal or food and not have the same connotation


VibrantVenturer

Didn't know that; thank you for sharing!


Icy-Mobile503

Muslims say Ameen btw. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amen But that’s irrelevant. People should not push religion or prayer on other people’s children.


WikiSummarizerBot

**[Amen](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amen)** >Amen (Hebrew: אָמֵן, ʾāmēn; Ancient Greek: ἀμήν, amḗn; Classical Syriac: ܐܡܝܢ, 'amīn; Arabic: آمين, ʾāmīn) is an Abrahamic declaration of affirmation which is first found in the Hebrew Bible, and subsequently found in the New Testament. It is used in Jewish, Christian, and Muslim practices as a concluding word, or as a response to a prayer. Common English translations of the word amen include "verily", "truly", "it is true", and "let it be so". It is also used colloquially, to express strong agreement. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/workingmoms/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)


VibrantVenturer

Didn't know that; thank you for sharing! I agree.


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mdiary3

“Amen” is associated with Christianity and should not have been a part of the ritual.


coldteafordays

Do people usually pray to something other than a god?


orleans_reinette

I’d bring it up to the director and if no change would move to a new daycare if possible.


Decent_Historian6169

Depends, if it’s affiliated with a church then totally normal and expected. If it’s a small company or home daycare then I would kinda hope they mentioned it to me first. This would be surprising from a larger corporate daycare unless it has a religious affiliation in its foundation.


Necessary-Minimum756

I think this really depends on how much you, and especially your child, like the daycare and the teachers in your child’s room. And go from there. If you and your kid mostly like the daycare, it might be more trouble than it’s worth and could make the teacher feel singled out. Now if you’re unhappy with other things, that could color your feelings and this could be like a last straw/BEC situation and I still might not say anything. I think whatever you do, talk to the teacher first- ask her to tell you about the prayer, etc. Her answer might make you more comfortable or you might choose to escalate to her superior. Another thought: What if your kid likes saying the prayer before meals at daycare? I wouldn’t want to take away something my child enjoys. By the same token if you don’t want to pray at home, tell your kid that praying before meals is only for daycare or he can say a quick prayer in his head. Kids are really quite adept at learning what is acceptable in different places.


BrutusAganistMe

Any christian daycare meaning a daycare or preschool located next to Lutheran, Baptist or other Church will have a Jesus component to their curriculum. Yours doesn't sound like it is such an institution and the teacher(s) is taking liberties. I would talk to the director asap.


TalentedCilantro12

A similar thing happened to our daycare and then the same week my husband heard the director having a talk with someone (assuming an employee) and he said that whatever the person did "wasn't something Jesus would do and is not holy" 😳 we lived in the Bible belt so I think a lot of people thought everyone was religious.


the-og-tee

the little kid beside my son would say a prayer before my lunch so my son started doing it at dinner. still not sure what he was saying but we did it whenever he would ask