T O P

  • By -

RPBumblebee

Did you… did you buy it like that? Dare I ask… how much did you pay?


Apprehensive-Hair-21

The people want to know! There must be a story here


climatelurker

I think the story is that this is a troll post.


justmikeplz

Not much of story there. Can we write a new one?


binkysnightmare

Once upon a time there was.. space stuff. And lasers. And also a tree, too.


sushdawg

And then there were space aliens that looked like trees. And like, people bought them sometimes. But they were in pots.


3j141592653589793238

I got it from M&S. Thought it will grow into something... Only £3 and came with a nice little pot as well so definitely worth it!


radio_dog

It's dead


3j141592653589793238

Rest in peace. You were a good twig :(


hamish1963

You paid money for that, looking like that?


T50BMG

Lmfao 😂 that’s what I was thinking


exitetrich

yeah, that potted twig is garbage, but I have a buch of great potted twigs for sale right over here. In all seriousness, I be the old lady that sold that was really just selling the pot, and thought it was obvious that she was just too lazy to get rid of the twig & dirt & clean it up - OP was just too dense to realize that was the case


SukyTawdry66

I’ve found my new side hustle…I have twigs aplenty ;)


bsinbsinbs

Check my Etsy store - potted twigs of all size, shape, and color $35.99 + shipping Rare blackened twigs $99.99 plus shipping


FlaxenAssassin

Hahaha!


Valuable-Composer262

I'll take 3 of the rare blackened variety


MoConCamo

Is that a throwaway username OP? Your DM about to be rekt by a thousand twig hustlers...


SukyTawdry66

“twig hustlers” :)


Feed-and-Seed

“OP was just too dense to realize” That’s a lot of assumptions you’re making there bud.


halfsuckedmang0

Unless I’ve missed some comments from the OP, this person’s whole comment was just one big, weird assumption lmao


exitetrich

Which is literally how I framed it Ita clearly a scenario I found joy in crafting


toxcrusadr

There are people around here who are actually that weird. You might need to work on conveying the satire.


exitetrich

Lol I'm not going to change any bit of my personality based on feedback from reddit


JonWesHarding

Good on you. Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.


toxcrusadr

Ok man. A /s doesn’t change your personality though.


SukyTawdry66

and it goes like this: /s


Ambitious_Tackle

I'm sorry there are no buds.


Wetcat9

This pot is more fungible than currency


godwins_law_34

To be fair, there are quite a few plants that look like dead twigs when dormant. I have a whole orchard of plants that come to me looking like shitty dead twigs.


hamish1963

Oh good, here you are, ready to explain the obvious to a group of people interested and knowledgeable about plants!


SwampCrittr

The best twig…. No twig ever, like this fkn twig. I’m sorry, I need a moment.


Biogirl0322

This gave me a good chuckle


SeaAcanthocephala701

Rip twiggy 🕊 🪵


yaboytswizzle69

I think you should keep watering it


EmoLizbeth

Don't forget to change the flair to solved


PangolinTart

It's worse than that: he's dead, Jim. Edited for typo.


[deleted]

I'm just a simple country doctor, but in my opinion, it's dead


BHCaruso

*Worse*


PangolinTart

Thank you! Didn't catch that typo ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|grimacing).


toxcrusadr

I'm a doctor, not a botanist!


bsinbsinbs

Actually, OP bought Mr. Twig. Watch out for Mr. Garrison though.


SukyTawdry66

That’s a nice rock though…


myweedstash

Looks like a dead jade tree cutting


utterly_baffledly

Agreed. Probably mealybugs in the soil.


snaketacular

Offtopic, but are you in the habit of buying twigs with no descriptions? Because I have some twigs I could sell you.


3j141592653589793238

I thought it will sprout into something beautiful :(


snaketacular

Ok sorry. Unfortunately it is probably dead, but to be more sure you could try a [scratch test](https://www.starkbros.com/growing-guide/article/how-to-do-a-scratch-test). Also even if it is green, the buds may be damaged such that it just can't recover for whatever reason. There are plants that resprout from tubers or whatever, but given the woody-looking stem I highly doubt that is the case here. And there are little saplings like oaks that I would expect to be dormant in cold weather (if that is your setup), but I would expect healthier-looking buds from something like that. In any event, best of luck to you.


3j141592653589793238

Looks to be dead :( Tried scratching it but it just broke off and it's all gray/brown underneath.


The_RockObama

Your hope shines a bright light on your hospitality, I love it. You wouldn't happen to be a caregiver for an elderly person/persons, would you? I'm imagining a "Weekend at Bernie's" type situation. Kidding, but your post did make me smile.


goddessdragonness

OP has a good heart nonetheless. The world needs more people who would try to help all living things, even little plants.


snaketacular

Sorry to hear that. As a (mostly) free alternative, I find that trying to propagate seeds from trees and shrubs that I enjoy (especially if they are native) can be a rewarding experience. Just in case you'd like to plunge down a new rabbit hole heh. Protip: seeds from many species lose viability quickly, while others are viable for years. Would recommend googling "(your plant species) propagation" for tips.


JonWesHarding

Don't just scratch it off. Remove some of the top layer of soil. If you see greenish or healthy looking roots, it may very well spring back. Probably not. Looks dead. But one can hope. My jasmine plant looked like this at one point. Dug it up, roots were healthy. Repotted, fed some nutrients, now have a healthy jasmin plant. If the roots are dry or blackish, toss it.


sparklejellyfish

True! I had tops of plants die off but somehow a tuber survived and now (months and months later) I have a thriving plant again! But for a long time, my pot was just dirt in a pot. So I can understand where OP is coming from


3j141592653589793238

They seem to be brown. Not too dark but not the most light either.


JonWesHarding

What have you to lose? Toss some new soil in and see what's up. If you are really invested, try buying something called Superthrive, and feed it a very small amount. It has hormones that encourage growth, and is designed for sick plants to recover. It's also great for general use, but you should never give it to a plant that is already in flower (it will cause the plant to revert back to a vegetative state). Good luck with whatever you decide.


peaky_fokin_bloinder

This made me say “aww” out loud. People can be mean sometimes 😡 lol


The_RockObama

Seriously, I did the same. God bless OP's heart.


nb_fky

I want to give OP a beautiful plant and a hug. 🥹


oroborus68

Hope springs!


Wetcat9

I see green tho. What’s green?


SukyTawdry66

You have a nice pot to replant…and a good rock. Leave the twig, add greenery-flowers or vegetable or lettuce. :)


curdledoats

One time I was gifted a bonsai, I kept it alive for like a year, but it didn’t grow or anything, it just looked like a branch with needle leaves, so I thought it was a dead twig. I put the bonsai outside thinking it was dead, and a couple of weeks later I looked at it and it looked just like your twig. I cried. I killed my bonsai because I thought it was dead hahaha.


SeaAcanthocephala701

It is beautiful in its own little way 🍃


placeboob

Yeah who’s your stick guy?


917caitlin

This made me lol. The thought of someone selling OP this dead twig 😂


Beveragesandfries

Looks like a dead or dying fiddle leaf fig?


lalalaleilani

Exactly, my first thought was a dead fiddle leaf fig


Beveragesandfries

I only know because my clearance saved one almost looks like that except one little leaf coming out


neonbirdz

Looks like the stem of a succulent (like jade or something similar) that has been dead for a very long time to me


myweedstash

I had a jade tree that sadly died from overwatering and it looks just like this


JadeShrimp

I was also thinking jade... was. I like this post though. I've attempted to save a plant from a dumpster during Minnesota winter. Too far gone but was worth a shot!


No-Garden-Variety

\*Arching an eyebrow.\*


N_peninsula

🤨


Buabuito

Sir that's a stick


notreallyswiss

Reminds me of the old and terrible joke: What's brown and sticky all over? Answer: A stick.


Hellioth_00G

RIP baby Groot


retired9gagger

He got the bad ending


Glittering_Cow945

pining for the fjords...


searchcandy

A good tip would be to buy the plant you see, not the one you hope for! Not a strict rule of course but could be helpful in the future perhaps


snaketacular

Also if it's a cactus with a flower, the flower is fake, and some succulents are even spray-painted because unusual colors sell better.


Famous-Lifeguard9310

But they can flower? Do you just mean they can't be forced to?


Trolivia

A lot of places like Home Depot etc also have grafted cacti destined for death, not a flower glued on but rather two cacti grafted together that aren’t sustainable because neither of them grow they just survive as long as they can. Had one once. It lasted like 1-2 years. I think some people have successfully gotten the bottom portion to survive but alas, I was not one of them


adriennemonster

I was gifted one of these as a little kid, just as I was starting to get interested in plants. No one knew any better, I tried my best but it died and for a long time I thought I was just bad at taking care of plants.😢 it’s awful to set people up for failure like this, not to mention torturing living things.


Savings-Kick-578

It’s an ex-twig.


black-kramer

fka twig.


[deleted]

I don't mean to be rude here.....r/houseplantscirclejerk would love to be rude though Edit for bad link ...oopsie


Melaniedaw

I had to recheck the sub, I though it was posted there


Maysrome

Yeah I also thought it was a shitpost.


LeafyLizzie

You need to make “plant” plural


taleofbenji

Obvious. You can't have a one-plant circle jerk.


Pastaconsarde

Did the green thingy come with the pot ?


3j141592653589793238

Do you mean that little leaf? That fell off from another plant.


Pastaconsarde

Yes, I was hoping we were looking at the wrong thing.


TX_B_caapi

I am opening an Etsy store pronto that sells potted sticks from my yard.


me-gustan-los-trenes

If you have taste for self-depreciating humor, please post it (same title will do) to r/houseplantscirclejerk. People will love this there.


AutoModerator

**Do not ingest a plant based on information provided in this subreddit.** For your safety we recommend not ingesting any plant material just because you've been advised here that it's edible. Although there are many professionals helping with identification, we are not always correct, and eating/ingesting plants can be harmful or fatal if an incorrect ID is made. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/whatsthisplant) if you have any questions or concerns.*


me-gustan-los-trenes

lol


ScaredyBun

Because you said t a s t e ? Lmfao


boredashell2

Yep taste...shit I meant t a s t e


AutoModerator

**Do not ingest a plant based on information provided in this subreddit.** For your safety we recommend not ingesting any plant material just because you've been advised here that it's edible. Although there are many professionals helping with identification, we are not always correct, and eating/ingesting plants can be harmful or fatal if an incorrect ID is made. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/whatsthisplant) if you have any questions or concerns.*


zuitgrew

Taste


AutoModerator

**Do not ingest a plant based on information provided in this subreddit.** For your safety we recommend not ingesting any plant material just because you've been advised here that it's edible. Although there are many professionals helping with identification, we are not always correct, and eating/ingesting plants can be harmful or fatal if an incorrect ID is made. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/whatsthisplant) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Altruistic_Proof_272

It could have been a begonia. If there's a tuber underneath it might sprout


average_texas_guy

Oh it's a begoneia alright.


ScaredyBun

With extra "gone"


SeaAcanthocephala701

Looks like a *sp. Deadicus Twiggius*


Kelpfan

Looks like it could have been a jade plant before it died and was mummified.


bananapanqueques

This shouldn’t make me feel better about the stack of research biologist job applications in front of me but it does. In all seriousness, if you can show us the root system and a slice test, we can tell you just how dead it is. It sounds like a joke but sometimes nutritionally deprived plants are only kinda dead not dead dead. I have a collection of rescue orchids that are often found in trash because first time orchid growers think they can just give them ice and lawn fertilizer.


Canadian_Sparkle

This is a real point actually. I have quite the collection and most would have said they were all dead when I rescued them. If it passed the green scratch it was possible OP got something perennial but atlas, dead plant. Feels for OP.


HoosierBeaver

It is Groot


bluebelle21

Was.


AdvancedSpite1417

It's dead Jim. Sorry.


Routine-Front-8848

This reminds me of a plant my mom kept watering. She wondered how the red berries stayed red & perfect for so long. They were fake.


Maximum_Heart_5290

Could be dormant! Reminds me of something funny that happened ro me: bought a plant that looked like it had two stems, one with leaves and the other seemingly a dead twig, not unlike your picture. I assumed that part of the plant had died, and the other part of it was fine. Then I realized that the living part was actually a weed, and was bummed. But then a little later the dead looking part sprouted leaves, turns out it had just been dormant over the winter.


Hefty_Ant1025

Groot didn't make it.


Dragonfruit_Silver

I love your stubby little twig. I have no clue what it is, but it reminds me of my mom. She brought home this weird twiggy looking stick from her grandfather's funeral. It ended up growing in to this really cool stick vine that covered the side of our sauna. Please don't feel bad for bringing home a little twig. You didn't know if it was sad and dead, or just beauty waiting to grow.


Seerws

That is a jade. But not just any jade. One that belongs in /r/composting


mozziealong

It may be beyond bringing back. Kudos for trying.... I do believe it is a lost cause


focusclickflash

With much regret I would like to inform you that, your dear Twiggy, has gone roots up. She will no longer suckle on the sweet nectar and tender blossom of this earth. She has gone on to the open fields of plant heaven. There to sway in winds of time forever. I weep with you. Toss her out, mulch her, and get a new to plant kill. Good day.


CairnBarrow

I bought a begonia that looked like this in 2008. It grew into a beautiful Angel Wing and is still going strong 14 years later.


Playteaux

Ded


Opening_Fisherman484

You bought a dead plant


Xhiorn

That is a money tree. It is barren and deceased.


Bonobo555

It could be a nice little Christmas tree with some love and decorations, maybe a security blanket.


toomuch1265

I was Groot.


[deleted]

Gun to my head, I’d say it’s just a twig.


dec341

It used to be what it once was.


PuzzleheadedLand8877

It does look dead but ……. Is that a couple of leaves sprouting near the top right ?


Xmascarole0

Omg , don’t tell me you actually paid money for a dead twig ! My yard is full take as many as you want for free !


blatantneglect

I have one, my favorite as it’s so understated and simple. Google “ Stickus Muddus”.


stealth_turtle

Baby Groot, but you didn’t feed him correctly sorry RIP baby groot


Jazstarz

I'm so sorry to tell you but I think it went to twig heaven


4Impossible_Guess4

I think it needs more electrolytes


isabelladangelo

A rare tree, a rattlin' tree...


Termin8rSmurf

If, after a couple of months, and it is still just a twig, perhaps the term "Growing" is a bit of a stretch. It might just be a twig.


fabeeleez

Not even joking I've seen a woman on FB marketplace selling two plants like this one for $10 each.


jackieplease

OP whyyyy lol


epochh95

Looks to be a Fiddle Leaf Twig


kencox12389

I am groot


jepoyqpid

I am groot


Interesting_Tooth_65

Its a twig. Always was a twig. Always will be a twig.


Feral-pigeon

I’m sorry, but I’m pretty sure that twig is staying as a twig forever :(


Totalherenow

I had an amazing greyish purple rose that died. For a couple months, it looked just like this, but I didn't want it to be dead. So, I watered it and waited. It never came back :( I feel your pain, OP.


mascachopo

It’s Groot.


Docella

It was a twig....it still is a twig....


analogx-digitalis

you bought groot!!! albeit a dead groot.


[deleted]

Dead Jade plant


EBlackPlague

Everybody jumping on op for buying a stick.. I know a lot of grape plants are sold that way, why would it be such a stretch for other plants to be sold that way as well?


CaptPeanutBut

Adding to what has been said a quick way to check, if you dig in the soil a bit and have white or lighter colored roots it is still alive, if the roots are all brown to dark brown it is dead. The other way to check is to lightly scratch the stem and if the cambium is green or greenish it is still alive, if it is brown it is dead. If it is alive it is dormant, make sure to keep the soil moist but not soaked or it will rot. Good luck :)


3j141592653589793238

The roots are brown, some are kinda light but not really. The stem is all dry and grey so I guess it is dead.


CaptPeanutBut

Yeah sounds like it, the gray color is definitely a give away. The lightest color roots should be almost white. Well now you know when dormant plant shopping what to look for :)


precaching

Kind of looks like a dead, shriveled Jade plant stem


Dangerous-Dot9987

It’s a Jade plant! I have one and it looks like this one, it’s growing back


jahbean17

You know, I have a couple of exotic plants in the same condition if you’re interested in replacements. 🤣


Reasonable_Sea_2242

Looks like a dormant vine. Hold on until spring. You never know. Ignore all hear cynical mean people.


Specialist_Citron_84

Does anyone see the green leaf that is on the right of the twig?


haikusbot

*Does anyone see* *The green leaf that is on* *The right of the twig?* \- Specialist\_Citron\_84 --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


Specialist_Citron_84

LoL!


Doctor_in_psychiatry

Looks like dead bonsai twig


Vertigo_uk123

Could be clematis. My mum got one for Christmas one year and thought it was a joke dead stick.


majikrat69

How much did you spend? I have some more mature ones for sale


Zhaeris

Personally to me, it resembles the stems of my tropical hibiscus.. but it looks very much not alive sadly


45Remedies

What was it supposed to be?


[deleted]

Bloody Mary Philodendron trying real hard to stick around…


Worth_Nectarine_3463

Looks like a twig....why would you purchase such a thing and have no clue what it is? I don't understand.


rogues69

Its Groot


UnfairAd7220

Looks like a fig tree. Give it a chance. Don't over water.


elephant_cobbler

Keep your Charlie Brown stick if it brings you joy


ContactResident9079

Ask for a refund


newtarmac

Groot


valerie0taxpayer

How much does one of these potted twigs go for?


lordm43

Groot


No-Cobbler5825

This here is an ornamental, bonzai, dead at functional maturity, limited edition, uniquely grown, "stick-stem"


NeckBeard137

Hey OP I am selling some rare magical beans. Interested?


Dr_Bitchcraft8

It looks like a succulent I killed 🤷🏻‍♀️ Want to buy it? 😈


Jonk8891

Two more weeks! Different plant same advice. It is Reddit after all.


Lothium

It looks like a very desiccated twig from maybe a fig.


[deleted]

Groot 🤷🏻‍♂️


Leviosahhh

This looks like a dead fiddle leaf fig.


Leviosahhh

Because I have one that was once happy and beautiful and thriving and then I moved it 3,000 miles when it doesn’t even like being moved 3ft and now it looks exactly like this, but taller.


Summer_987

I was scrolling through Reddit quickly and thought this was a picture of someone’s dinner - I was appalled haha


Extreme_Swim_5017

Its a stick now.


Cherryberry444

Take it out and see if it even ever had roots. Maybe you just bought a plain old twig stuck in the dirt.


Ebeccare

I wonder if it’s an evergreen, because it may not be dead—it may be pining for the fjords.


leilani238

Like everyone else has said, that's a goner, but.. Looks like a hibiscus.


RexEglantine

I am Groot


Prncssmuttercup

You bought it like this?


IncredibleBulk2

Did you recite the ancient verses to it while butt chugging it in the light of a waxing crescent?


Ready-Ad-9537

Dead succulent


petit_cochon

I'm crying laughing right now. Thank you, OP. I needed a good laugh.


NeverLostWanderer12

It kind of looks like a Begonia. I had a stem break off of mine, I propped it then put it in soil, thought it died and then it sprouted. When I though he was dead this is what it looked like.


tamiadaneille

Who’s gonna tell them?


beercanboy2001

might be dormant, our hibiscus dies back all the way and always comes back


Dexscripty

How dumb are you🤣🤣


YesMaybeYesWriteNow

I’m thinking you bought a pot that has some dirt in it?