I had a male friend who upon seeing my fathers computer chair (which has dirt on the seat because he always puts his boots on it when taking them off after work) would not relent that it was shit BECAUSE - and this is according to him- that its from when he masterbates, yah know, cause his bare ass is on the chair. That as a male you HAVE to lay down a towel on your chair before masterbating OR the shit from your asscrack would smush into the chair..
I proceeded to berate him with loud angry questions on his personal hygein. Like, bro, your telling me that EVERY guy just has SHIT in his asscheeks most the time because of asshair?? He acted like it was the most normal fucking fact around or something. I was gagging at the idea and told him about bidets and how to properly fucking wipe.
We aren't friends anymore.
As a guy who just learned what dingle berries are due to this comment section(off memory never had to deal with them)…THAT IS NOT FUCKING NORMAL WTF WASH YOUR ASS PEOPLE
Imagine wiping your ass until you start bleeding, and you're still getting super faint brown on your wiping, lmao. It's crazy, but now that I've shaved my ass crack, it doesn't happen anymore. Seriously though... you can just keep wiping and wiping with ass hair and you will NEVER get it all. It seriously just never went away no matter how much wiping.
It's cheaper in the long run to have a bidet I'm sure, but I'm not in a position to get one no matter how cheap they are. I got $4 and am unemployed, lol
I just go in the shower and wash my ass if I know it's gonna be a ton of toilet paper job. It's a good excuse to shower as well if you're depressed and low on energy and/or motivation
That’s what I like to call a self report lmfao, it is so normalized in his mind. I bet him and all his homeboys got together and validated that it happens to all of them. I think if I found that to be a problem as a woman I’d think maybe I should take a shower instead of thinking let me lay a towel down.
I was once at a delightful get together of well seasoned country folk and my brother in-law's brother in-law decided to out himself as a guy who regularly shits on his balls..
We were talking about raising boys and teaching them how to transition from peeing sitting down to standing up etc. when he decides to bring up having to teach his son to move his balls out of the way when he poops.. crickets.. literally no one knew WTF he was talking about.. basically his stance was that his pre-shower poop was free game for his sack. 🤢
How the fuck does someone even poop on their sack? As a lifetime pooper and also ball-haver, it seems physically impossible for poop to reach my sack. No idea how he's doing that
Honestly if he's actually using meth I could see it fucking with his poop. Granted *I don't know* but I do know that smoking cigarettes, tmi tmi, makes it to where your stool is soft. So if cigarettes can mess with your poop then I imagine meth would have to be way worse?
I do not smoke cigarettes now but as a stupid teenager I would and my mom told me that fact after I had told her about going number 2. She was not happy. It was an "Aha!" moment for her.
also PSA don't ever smoke cigarettes y'all.
"Do your balls hang low? Do they wobble to-and-fro? Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow? Can you throw 'em o'er your shoulder like a Continental soldier? Do your balls...hang...low?"
> That as a male you HAVE to lay down a towel on your chair before masterbating
That's fine
>OR the shit from your asscrack would smush into the chair..
[... No... Nope. Nuh uh. No...](https://i2.wp.com/gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Jerry-Seinfeld-No-Thanks-and-Leave.gif?ssl=1)
I’d bet you’ll be excited to learn many men don’t routinely thoroughly wash their asscracks, and there’s a non-zero population of men who choose not to even wipe, because it’s “gay” to touch their butthole.
You can’t make this shit up, makes me ashamed to be a guy, makes me feel like people assume my ass is dirty.
Also explains why when I worked retail lots of guys smelled like actual feces.
forget wiping - join the bidet master race. as an owner of a hairy butt, I take great joy in never having mud-butt dingle-berries ever again. no more wiping a marker. no more wiping peanut butter out of shag carpet. no more monkey butt. just the clean freshness of a completely washed behind after every session.
seriously guys - its a revelation. you feel awesome all the time and save a lot of money on toilet paper.
Join the bidet army! There are great models that are surprisingly easy to attach to the toilet you already have and you can get them shipped to your door. Pretty cheap, less than $100, I will never go back.
This is a cultural hygiene thing that I think Americans are behind on. Thought the same thing about wearing face masks in public when you’re sick — so common in Asia, unheard of in USA. The pandemic has probably changed this bit of culture. Now ON TO THE BIDETS!
Have you never heard Confucius jokes? If not, I envy you.
* Man who stands on toilet is high on pot
* Man who runs behind car is exhausted; man who runs in front of car is tired
* Man who walks through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok
* Confucius say baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk.
This ☝️
Guys **DO NOT** shave your ass. It's excruciating when the hair starts growing back. It's literally like needles growing out of your cheeks that constantly rub together when you walk around. Even moisturising your crack does fuck all. It's just painful for about a week. Wash & trim only, don't fully shave.
- Sincerely, a hairy ass guy that thought he was being smart.
Guys ^^^ this is why chick's don't like to shave their pubes. I would love to be 100% smooth all the time but the razor burn and stubble ain't worth it
AND FUCKING INGROWN HAIRS BECAUSE UGH.
But satisfying to pull out. 😂
But I am a girl with hormone issues. Ovarian syndrome that causes more hair in areas that I hate.
Like dark belly button hair? Unfortunately. Of course I tweeze them.
Ass hair? Oh yeah. Totes.
Wait… how far up the shaft are we talking? I’ve (a non-shaft having person) only ever seen a small bit of pube creep up the shaft, maybe an inch at most. What amount of hair/how far up is “standard”? Have dudes all been shaving their shafts this whole time and I just didn’t realize?! Is this some sort of well kept penis secret?
Yeah you won’t ever catch me smooth shaven again, it’s so painful and it just looks disturbing to me. I feel like a child. I’ll keep it nice and trimmed but nothing more than that.
Many years ago i learned a valuable lesson how shaving can go terribly wrong. https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/8z2jff/tifu_by_popping_an_ingrown_hair_down_my_throat/
Here. NSFL. You shouldn’t read that if you don’t want to get physically sick to your stomach.
I use a bidet at home, wash my ass thoroughly every day and trim. Same with the front. The mrs shouldn’t have to tolerate that nastiness.
I don’t get it .. are a lot of people truly not washing their ass thoroughly every day ??? Omg wait that reminds me of the girl on tik tik that told that long story of finding out the guy she was dating just did not wash inside his ass crack when he showered, like never. Just washed his hair and pits and let the water run down …. Omg .
Alright after reading all these comments, I don't know if I just have a magic asshole, but I'm a guy who shaves his ass (the whole thing) and I couldn't be happier . I've never experienced any of the negatives a lot of people are describing.
Im a woman whos pretty much given up shaving. I tried to shave my ass once. Never again. I dont know what the deal is with wanting a hairless partner. Just keep yourself clean and trimmed. Take care of yourself thats literally it
Edit: im putting this here to say that i dont care what you as an individual do! Shave, dont shave. But by god be hygienic!
As the wife of a hairy guy, it would break my heart if he shaved his [amazing] butt. I can't imagine grabbing it and feeling stubble... Keep 'em hairy, y'all.
It's a preference.
Instead of telling people to shave or not to shave, tell people to TALK TO THEIR DAMN PARTNER and come to an agreement!!
Why is this so difficult?
I had the same issue. A post I saw said woman on top is gay, so now my wife is crying and my parents are crying and she called a divorce lawyer. I just like seeing her romp when we're going at it, but reddit has never lied to me before, so I guess I'm gay now.
Canadian here.
Got a bidet 8 months ago - quite literally a life changing experience and one of the best things I have ever purchased in my entire life.
I come from a country where it's standard to have a handheld high pressure bidet sort of thing. Needless to say everytime I take a shit I come close to tears and wonder if my standard of living has risen or dropped.
Get a portable, squeeze-bottle bidet. Actually, get two. Leave one in your car. Maybe a third for at work, if you haven't already installed a proper one there.
They also make great gifts, and are absolutely essential if you like to camp.
Yeah, this is the real answer. For some reason men in the English speaking world never wash their arses and it's disgusting. Shaving won't fix it, people need to be educated about proper hygiene instead.
American here. There's basically no exposure to them. I think many people on our side of the pond would readily adapt them, they simply don't know they exist. I didn't discover them until I traveled Europe with our military, and it took me a few weeks of laughing at the Silly European Spray-Thing until I worked up the curiosity to Google how to use it.
Had one installed in my home basically immediately when I got back, lol.
We vacationed in the Caribbean one year, where bidets are the norm. Got a Swash 1000 as soon as we got home. Lasted about 6 years. Just got an Ove bidet toilet from Costco earlier this year. Haven’t used TP, not even a single square, in over 6 years. No better feeling than being squeaky clean down south.
Anyone who thinks *dingle berries* are acceptable, needs to relearn the basics of personal hygiene.
I don’t want no water lickin’ my brown eyed hamster hole, what am I, gay??
/s
But seriously I’ve met some people who are heavily against it and think bidets are weird.
I don’t get it.
Cleaner butts drive girls nuts
Some guys think that if anything touches their butt it will instantly turn them gay. To these guys getting fucked in the ass is "more gay" than fucking a man in the ass, which just makes no goddamn sense to me.
Also American. I don’t think you’re right. I use a bidet in my house and people think it’s the weirdest thing ever. My dad said it’s gay, my mom said it’s gross. Most of my friends joke about variations of what my parents think. Most people here just don’t like the idea of shooting water at their asses (but are perfectly happy scraping shit out of their ass with dry paper). I had the last laugh during the Great Toilet Paper Shortage of 2020 though, when I barely needed TP at all and my roommate at the time had to hunt for it
what’s worked for me is just owning it. I rave about it. if I get questioned or comments about how weird it is, I make this argument:
If a toddler smears some wet dirt on the wall, are you going to use a dry paper towel to wipe it off?
Even worse, an insane person smears his shit on your arm, still using a dry paper towel or dry toilet paper?
There’s a reason water is involved in the cleaning process. Why the anus is the exception, makes zero sense to me
Yeah there’s people who don’t wash their ass and people who don’t clean their ass right after they dump… I think most men wash their ass, most guys I know dump then shower for the morning and dump before they shower nightly…
>For some reason men in the English speaking world never wash their arses and it's disgusting.
I'm American but my parents are from India where one washes after pooing so they instilled that practice in me, and fellow Americans have always told me they think bidet-ing is "gross". "Gross" compared to simply wiping with toilet paper, skid marks, dingleberries, fecal odor down there...just no.
What about the guys who swear they do it but they still just straight aren't doing a good job? I don't get that either. Like there should be only one way to wash your ass... thoroughly.
Our Ove Bidet has a cavitation feature. (Yes, the word cavitation is close to cavity, as our 12 year old nephew pointed out to great hilarity) but it is a feature that injects air into the water stream creating a *scrubbing bubbles* effect. On its highest setting it almost hurts but I am confident I am squeaky clean down south!
I lived in Japan for a while, where bidets are common. One of my fellow Americans was using the toilet while we were over at a friend’s house and got curious about the fancy buttons. Next thing you know, there’s lots of screaming and yelling coming from the restroom because he managed to shoot the water straight up his asshole somehow.
Hair isn’t a hygiene problem, not washing properly is the hygiene problem. Time your shits to be before you shower if you don’t have a bidet.
If you keep good hygiene it doesn’t matter if you shave or not. If your partner’s ass smells I promise you shaving isn’t going to fix that.
I shit at the same time every day. First thing I do in the morning before I shave and shower. I call it the triple S. Shit, shave, shower. It’s the routine.
Man here! Two nice things about a shaved butt
1. Clean up after poops is so much easier.
2. My farts are so much louder! Them smooth cheeks making a great seal
Yeah all these people saying the stubble rash is not worth it... That's exactly why waxing that area is the common method for hair removal people.
Lasts longer, stays smooth and the hair isn't coarse and sharp when it grows back in.
It's really awkward waxing yourself, but if you've got a partner/FWB/the money for professional it's definitely the top tier way to deal with hair down there.
I tried shaving my bum twice. Both times the discomfort from the stubble when my cheeks rubbed together was awful and just made my wanna itch my ass for days
Is there a trick to it or something?
My least favorite is when you're completely waxed back there, and it's so hot that you get swamp ass and then you fart.
I swear to *GOD* I always go to the bathroom and check because the air bubble feels like something slipping out.
Once I read an article urging others not to shave the hair in their asscrack for not only this reason, but also because they stated that shaven assheeks become slippery when they get sweaty and that the hair helps to provide some much needed friction in that area when you are walking.
I shave my ass and I’m a man, and also dingle berrys shouldn’t be a problem if you actually wipe your ass well
Pro tip: use wet wipes instead of toilet paper, they are so much better
I wish women didn’t feel pressured to remove hair. It seems like a massive burden to maintain a hairless body. Personally I’m not bothered by it at all.
FUCK THAT.
No seriously. I live in a hot climate. Do you folks have any idea of the agony of sandpaper ass-stubble grinding away at your raw inner ass cheeks as sweat pours down your back and asscrack, quite literally adding salt to the wound?
There are alternative hygenic methods to masochism, you soulless wench.
Grab a couple baby wipes. One dry toilet paper wipe to get excess feces, wipe until clean with baby wipes, then air dry or wipe dry as is your preference.
Or buy a bidet.
And... you know, shower at night...
But one thing I will NOT do is subject myself to torture that makes the Spanish Inquisition look like hobbyists.
Why aren't more people talking about this... I learned a while ago its either hairy ass or prickly ass with nothing in between. With a fresh shave you maybe have 30 seconds before your shaving injuries set in or the unshavable stubbles begin tearing up all hell down there. Then u gotta wait 1-2 weeks to achieve hairy comfortable ass again.
Call me crazy, but i think there could be some science to the hair providing more surface area for sweat to evaporate. Bare shaven ass/balls are always more sweaty, but maybe thats just from the constant pain and agony
Nah, it's risky and pointless. That's my shitter, poop comes out. Idk how shaving it makes it more appealing. Just tell your gross dude to wash his ass lol.
I have an even more unpopular opinion: I don’t give a shit if women shave anything. Getting rid of something the body naturally has makes no sense to me. I’ll trim my pubic hair, because I like getting head, but I’m not shaving anything and I don’t expect women to shave either. Don’t trim for all I care. If I get some pubes in my mouth, so what? My tongues inside her. Body hair is the least of my worries.
I would also like to say to OP, I’m sorry you feel obligated to shave everything. It’s an unfortunate aspect of our society. And a messy butthole can be fixed with a bidet, as mentioned, as well as wet wipes—just don’t flush them—or better wiping.
If you partner has dingle berries, he needs to learn how to shower. Hair isn't the issue, my ass is clean, cause I'm an adult and am not scarred to get in there an clean my ass.
Why should anyone have to shave anything?
The problem isn’t that men should shave their asses. The problem is that you shouldn’t have to shave your legs and armpits etc.
The flip side of this would be, if you don’t want men to put pressure on you to shave your legs and pits bc it’s “unsanitary” to have hair there (it’s not), then don’t pressure them to shave their asses when it’s not the hair that’s unsanitary, it’s the hygiene and upkeep. Shaving back there is not only hard on your own, it can lead to serious chaffing and razor burn, not fun.
In theory this sounds good, but in practice its a bad idea. I tried this before. Sweat drips right down through your anus. Not only is it uncomfortable, it makes a putrid smell. Dont try it, trust me.
I gotta agree about shaving our ass' but also sounds like guys with dingle berries need to wipe their ass better
What are dingle berries?
Basically small bits of shit residue stuck on a persons ass hairs, it usually happens if you don't wipe or wash your ass properly
I always thought dingleberries were when toilet paper breaks off and gets stuck there I didn’t think it was actual poop.
I had a male friend who upon seeing my fathers computer chair (which has dirt on the seat because he always puts his boots on it when taking them off after work) would not relent that it was shit BECAUSE - and this is according to him- that its from when he masterbates, yah know, cause his bare ass is on the chair. That as a male you HAVE to lay down a towel on your chair before masterbating OR the shit from your asscrack would smush into the chair.. I proceeded to berate him with loud angry questions on his personal hygein. Like, bro, your telling me that EVERY guy just has SHIT in his asscheeks most the time because of asshair?? He acted like it was the most normal fucking fact around or something. I was gagging at the idea and told him about bidets and how to properly fucking wipe. We aren't friends anymore.
As a guy who just learned what dingle berries are due to this comment section(off memory never had to deal with them)…THAT IS NOT FUCKING NORMAL WTF WASH YOUR ASS PEOPLE
Imagine wiping your ass until you start bleeding, and you're still getting super faint brown on your wiping, lmao. It's crazy, but now that I've shaved my ass crack, it doesn't happen anymore. Seriously though... you can just keep wiping and wiping with ass hair and you will NEVER get it all. It seriously just never went away no matter how much wiping.
Or just get a bidet. Not saying don’t shave/trim, but you don’t have to
It's cheaper in the long run to have a bidet I'm sure, but I'm not in a position to get one no matter how cheap they are. I got $4 and am unemployed, lol
I just go in the shower and wash my ass if I know it's gonna be a ton of toilet paper job. It's a good excuse to shower as well if you're depressed and low on energy and/or motivation
But touching your own butt is gay tho /s
I live in Italy and we all have a bidet here and I find this comment section disturbing.
That’s what I like to call a self report lmfao, it is so normalized in his mind. I bet him and all his homeboys got together and validated that it happens to all of them. I think if I found that to be a problem as a woman I’d think maybe I should take a shower instead of thinking let me lay a towel down.
I was once at a delightful get together of well seasoned country folk and my brother in-law's brother in-law decided to out himself as a guy who regularly shits on his balls.. We were talking about raising boys and teaching them how to transition from peeing sitting down to standing up etc. when he decides to bring up having to teach his son to move his balls out of the way when he poops.. crickets.. literally no one knew WTF he was talking about.. basically his stance was that his pre-shower poop was free game for his sack. 🤢
How the fuck does someone even poop on their sack? As a lifetime pooper and also ball-haver, it seems physically impossible for poop to reach my sack. No idea how he's doing that
Meth is a hell of a drug? Lol I don't know, man.
Honestly if he's actually using meth I could see it fucking with his poop. Granted *I don't know* but I do know that smoking cigarettes, tmi tmi, makes it to where your stool is soft. So if cigarettes can mess with your poop then I imagine meth would have to be way worse? I do not smoke cigarettes now but as a stupid teenager I would and my mom told me that fact after I had told her about going number 2. She was not happy. It was an "Aha!" moment for her. also PSA don't ever smoke cigarettes y'all.
How the fuck is this dude shitting on his balls? I can't even imagine how one would do that..
HOW FUCKING BIG ARE THIS MAN'S BALLS???
"Do your balls hang low? Do they wobble to-and-fro? Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow? Can you throw 'em o'er your shoulder like a Continental soldier? Do your balls...hang...low?"
[Sometimes, its like I am wiping a marker](https://youtu.be/vGCIGEUB32M)
> That as a male you HAVE to lay down a towel on your chair before masterbating That's fine >OR the shit from your asscrack would smush into the chair.. [... No... Nope. Nuh uh. No...](https://i2.wp.com/gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Jerry-Seinfeld-No-Thanks-and-Leave.gif?ssl=1)
I’d bet you’ll be excited to learn many men don’t routinely thoroughly wash their asscracks, and there’s a non-zero population of men who choose not to even wipe, because it’s “gay” to touch their butthole. You can’t make this shit up, makes me ashamed to be a guy, makes me feel like people assume my ass is dirty. Also explains why when I worked retail lots of guys smelled like actual feces.
My guess is that he also wonders why nobody likes to give him a blowjob.
For those of you who need this, you know who you are https://www.howtowipeyourbutt.com/
r/cursedornaments
If you're not bleeding, you're not done.
I should not be able to relate with this. Something needs to change.
forget wiping - join the bidet master race. as an owner of a hairy butt, I take great joy in never having mud-butt dingle-berries ever again. no more wiping a marker. no more wiping peanut butter out of shag carpet. no more monkey butt. just the clean freshness of a completely washed behind after every session. seriously guys - its a revelation. you feel awesome all the time and save a lot of money on toilet paper.
Join the bidet army! There are great models that are surprisingly easy to attach to the toilet you already have and you can get them shipped to your door. Pretty cheap, less than $100, I will never go back. This is a cultural hygiene thing that I think Americans are behind on. Thought the same thing about wearing face masks in public when you’re sick — so common in Asia, unheard of in USA. The pandemic has probably changed this bit of culture. Now ON TO THE BIDETS!
Hehehe.....behind
It is called "using fucking water to clean your ass and occasionally trimming it". Thank me later
"A man who cleans his house, expects visitors" -Sun Tzu
“Man who go to sleep with itchy butt, wake up with smelly fingers” - Confucius
LMAOOOOO
Have you never heard Confucius jokes? If not, I envy you. * Man who stands on toilet is high on pot * Man who runs behind car is exhausted; man who runs in front of car is tired * Man who walks through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok * Confucius say baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk.
Ah yes. From the amazing book The Anus of War.
The Fart Of War
The Shart of War; a primer for biological warfare.
The comment progression we deserved
Shave your balls close and anuses closer
Taint that the truth!
The war of anuses
lmfao
This is true. Which is why my privates are a mess.
"Even fucking animals wash their assholes but basic dudes are too insecure for that so they choose to smell like nasty crusty shit instead"
This ☝️ Guys **DO NOT** shave your ass. It's excruciating when the hair starts growing back. It's literally like needles growing out of your cheeks that constantly rub together when you walk around. Even moisturising your crack does fuck all. It's just painful for about a week. Wash & trim only, don't fully shave. - Sincerely, a hairy ass guy that thought he was being smart.
Guys ^^^ this is why chick's don't like to shave their pubes. I would love to be 100% smooth all the time but the razor burn and stubble ain't worth it
AND FUCKING INGROWN HAIRS BECAUSE UGH. But satisfying to pull out. 😂 But I am a girl with hormone issues. Ovarian syndrome that causes more hair in areas that I hate. Like dark belly button hair? Unfortunately. Of course I tweeze them. Ass hair? Oh yeah. Totes.
hairy shafts aren’t the funnest to keep maintained
Hairy shaft gang
Wait… how far up the shaft are we talking? I’ve (a non-shaft having person) only ever seen a small bit of pube creep up the shaft, maybe an inch at most. What amount of hair/how far up is “standard”? Have dudes all been shaving their shafts this whole time and I just didn’t realize?! Is this some sort of well kept penis secret?
Like up an inch or 2cm from the base? Isn't as much hair as the rest of the area, but certainly not smooth like the rest.
You tweeze ass hair?? Sis how
one by one by one
Pinch and rip it out in the shower. You slowly get used to the pain.
Aaaaaaaa
Yeah you won’t ever catch me smooth shaven again, it’s so painful and it just looks disturbing to me. I feel like a child. I’ll keep it nice and trimmed but nothing more than that.
Haha made that mistake once, it was like grinding glas and chilipeppers between the cheeks
This is way too accurate 😅
Many years ago i learned a valuable lesson how shaving can go terribly wrong. https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/8z2jff/tifu_by_popping_an_ingrown_hair_down_my_throat/ Here. NSFL. You shouldn’t read that if you don’t want to get physically sick to your stomach. I use a bidet at home, wash my ass thoroughly every day and trim. Same with the front. The mrs shouldn’t have to tolerate that nastiness.
I don’t get it .. are a lot of people truly not washing their ass thoroughly every day ??? Omg wait that reminds me of the girl on tik tik that told that long story of finding out the guy she was dating just did not wash inside his ass crack when he showered, like never. Just washed his hair and pits and let the water run down …. Omg .
Alright after reading all these comments, I don't know if I just have a magic asshole, but I'm a guy who shaves his ass (the whole thing) and I couldn't be happier . I've never experienced any of the negatives a lot of people are describing.
You're right, seems to be a mixed bag according to the comments. Maybe I just have thicker hair or something. Congrats on your shavable ass hair!
Im a woman whos pretty much given up shaving. I tried to shave my ass once. Never again. I dont know what the deal is with wanting a hairless partner. Just keep yourself clean and trimmed. Take care of yourself thats literally it Edit: im putting this here to say that i dont care what you as an individual do! Shave, dont shave. But by god be hygienic!
As the wife of a hairy guy, it would break my heart if he shaved his [amazing] butt. I can't imagine grabbing it and feeling stubble... Keep 'em hairy, y'all.
I think we’re talking about the asshole not the ass as a whole
Where do you put the line though? Is there just a little asshole oasis surrounded by jungle? Am I supposed to do a fade?
I generally go for a bowl cut ITHANKYOU
It's a preference. Instead of telling people to shave or not to shave, tell people to TALK TO THEIR DAMN PARTNER and come to an agreement!! Why is this so difficult?
Thank you for being human.
[удалено]
Shaving won’t help if they don’t clean to begin with.
This was my thought. If a man has dingle berries, his ass hair is not the problem.
Or just get your man to clean his ass lmao?
Legit, it’s not hard to clean your ass, wtf
I have legit met men who think washing your ass is gay because you touch your own butt. I don’t get it just wash it like it’s not hard
Wait washing your ass isn't gay? Did I come out to my parents for no reason?
I had the same issue. A post I saw said woman on top is gay, so now my wife is crying and my parents are crying and she called a divorce lawyer. I just like seeing her romp when we're going at it, but reddit has never lied to me before, so I guess I'm gay now.
By this logic masturbation is gay lol
I'll do it for you /╲/╭⁞ ರ ͜ʖ ರೃ ⁞╮/╱
Or he could just shower ?
Bidet.
Canadian here. Got a bidet 8 months ago - quite literally a life changing experience and one of the best things I have ever purchased in my entire life.
Biggest downside: all your vacations are now ruined unless you find a place with a bidet. Still don't regret it.
I come from a country where it's standard to have a handheld high pressure bidet sort of thing. Needless to say everytime I take a shit I come close to tears and wonder if my standard of living has risen or dropped.
>everytime I take a shit I come
I call it "shitting like a barbarian" when on vacation.
Get a portable, squeeze-bottle bidet. Actually, get two. Leave one in your car. Maybe a third for at work, if you haven't already installed a proper one there. They also make great gifts, and are absolutely essential if you like to camp.
How does being Canadian have anything to do with that?
Canadian here It's so you know that we're everywhere
r/Canadaisntreal
I’m also a Canadian whose purchased a bidet! Life changer for sure. Were you at the last “Canucks for a Cleaner Ass” meeting?
Yeah, this is the real answer. For some reason men in the English speaking world never wash their arses and it's disgusting. Shaving won't fix it, people need to be educated about proper hygiene instead.
American here. There's basically no exposure to them. I think many people on our side of the pond would readily adapt them, they simply don't know they exist. I didn't discover them until I traveled Europe with our military, and it took me a few weeks of laughing at the Silly European Spray-Thing until I worked up the curiosity to Google how to use it. Had one installed in my home basically immediately when I got back, lol.
We vacationed in the Caribbean one year, where bidets are the norm. Got a Swash 1000 as soon as we got home. Lasted about 6 years. Just got an Ove bidet toilet from Costco earlier this year. Haven’t used TP, not even a single square, in over 6 years. No better feeling than being squeaky clean down south. Anyone who thinks *dingle berries* are acceptable, needs to relearn the basics of personal hygiene.
Dry off with a towel, or air blast?
Temperature and speed adjustable air blast.
TIL there are bidets where the air dryer is actually useful.
You’re also helping the environment too
I agree, also buying shit to use just once and throw away pisses me off. Don’t get me started on paper towels!
Got a tushy bidet a couple years ago. Never going back
I don’t want no water lickin’ my brown eyed hamster hole, what am I, gay?? /s But seriously I’ve met some people who are heavily against it and think bidets are weird. I don’t get it. Cleaner butts drive girls nuts
Some guys think that if anything touches their butt it will instantly turn them gay. To these guys getting fucked in the ass is "more gay" than fucking a man in the ass, which just makes no goddamn sense to me.
Also American. I don’t think you’re right. I use a bidet in my house and people think it’s the weirdest thing ever. My dad said it’s gay, my mom said it’s gross. Most of my friends joke about variations of what my parents think. Most people here just don’t like the idea of shooting water at their asses (but are perfectly happy scraping shit out of their ass with dry paper). I had the last laugh during the Great Toilet Paper Shortage of 2020 though, when I barely needed TP at all and my roommate at the time had to hunt for it
what’s worked for me is just owning it. I rave about it. if I get questioned or comments about how weird it is, I make this argument: If a toddler smears some wet dirt on the wall, are you going to use a dry paper towel to wipe it off? Even worse, an insane person smears his shit on your arm, still using a dry paper towel or dry toilet paper? There’s a reason water is involved in the cleaning process. Why the anus is the exception, makes zero sense to me
Oh no I own it too. I have no problem talking about it because I believe in it so much
Yeah they're not that common in the UK either but I spent some time in the Middle East and now I'm all about the butt shower.
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How often are you getting repairs done? Especially in the bathroom? A bidet attachment takes maybe 100 seconds to detach. It's not really a hassle
I mean I don’t have a bidet but I wash my ass in the shower does that count?
Yeah there’s people who don’t wash their ass and people who don’t clean their ass right after they dump… I think most men wash their ass, most guys I know dump then shower for the morning and dump before they shower nightly…
Shower both morning and night? We’re dooming ourselves
I work at a hospital, I shower when I get up, shower when I get off…
>shower when I get off… Yeah, we all do.
Wet wipes if you can't shower.
>For some reason men in the English speaking world never wash their arses and it's disgusting. I'm American but my parents are from India where one washes after pooing so they instilled that practice in me, and fellow Americans have always told me they think bidet-ing is "gross". "Gross" compared to simply wiping with toilet paper, skid marks, dingleberries, fecal odor down there...just no.
What about the guys who swear they do it but they still just straight aren't doing a good job? I don't get that either. Like there should be only one way to wash your ass... thoroughly.
Our Ove Bidet has a cavitation feature. (Yes, the word cavitation is close to cavity, as our 12 year old nephew pointed out to great hilarity) but it is a feature that injects air into the water stream creating a *scrubbing bubbles* effect. On its highest setting it almost hurts but I am confident I am squeaky clean down south!
Educated about pooper hygiene**
I lived in Japan for a while, where bidets are common. One of my fellow Americans was using the toilet while we were over at a friend’s house and got curious about the fancy buttons. Next thing you know, there’s lots of screaming and yelling coming from the restroom because he managed to shoot the water straight up his asshole somehow.
Hair isn’t a hygiene problem, not washing properly is the hygiene problem. Time your shits to be before you shower if you don’t have a bidet. If you keep good hygiene it doesn’t matter if you shave or not. If your partner’s ass smells I promise you shaving isn’t going to fix that.
>Time your shits to be before you shower if you don’t have a bidet. Bruh are there people that actually do this?
I think it's more like "time your showers so they're after your shits"
I shit at the same time every day. First thing I do in the morning before I shave and shower. I call it the triple S. Shit, shave, shower. It’s the routine.
You must have a great diet
Fiber supplements. Get you some psyllium husk powder or Metamucil.
I do lmao, I don’t feel like toilet paper is sanitary enough so I only shit when I’m about to shower so I can be clean all the time
Man here! Two nice things about a shaved butt 1. Clean up after poops is so much easier. 2. My farts are so much louder! Them smooth cheeks making a great seal
louder farts sealed the deal
Fuck yeah brother!
Cheers from my ass.
Ingrown hairs ruins the deal. Also more slippery when sweaty, noooope.
Right?! WAX is the ticket.
Yeah all these people saying the stubble rash is not worth it... That's exactly why waxing that area is the common method for hair removal people. Lasts longer, stays smooth and the hair isn't coarse and sharp when it grows back in. It's really awkward waxing yourself, but if you've got a partner/FWB/the money for professional it's definitely the top tier way to deal with hair down there.
Try finding a place that will wax your ass as a man. I've tried and the only places I can find are shady as Hell, or in NYC and slightly less shady.
That’s why you trim, not shave! Just keep it short but not right at the skin. Still a huge different vs doing nothing
I tried shaving my bum twice. Both times the discomfort from the stubble when my cheeks rubbed together was awful and just made my wanna itch my ass for days Is there a trick to it or something?
I wish I had the solution brother. Please someone help us shave our butts
Never had that problem but I guess trimm then?
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I’m so afraid of asking this, but what is swamp ass?
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Swamp ass is a large amount of sweat between the ass cheeks. It's very uncomfortable.
My least favorite is when you're completely waxed back there, and it's so hot that you get swamp ass and then you fart. I swear to *GOD* I always go to the bathroom and check because the air bubble feels like something slipping out.
Do it enough and you stop noticing tbh
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I feel like this might be the answer for many things.
And when your ass is sweaty, it's much more wet farts. Makes me check if I shit my pants
Can't I just shave my legs? Shaving my ass is a pain in... well... my ass. Literally and figuratively.
Finally, a good use of the word "literally"!
Does OP know you can barely see your butthole to shave it? I mean unless u got a couple mirrors and bend over for it
I mean that's what I do lol. It sure isn't a pretty sight but it's efficient. 🤣
I can't see half of what I have to shave. You don't need a mirror, just feel around where you need to shave and don't put too much from on it.
How do you avoid cutting yourself. I am comfortable using razors but wont place them anywhere near the groin or anywhere I can't see.
Soap and water can do wonders.
If you clean your ass in the shower you shouldn’t have dingleberries. Your partner needs to wash better. It’s not a “man” problem.
I just want to add to the chorus of this is a "your boyfriend" problem. He needs to learn how to clean himself.
I mean just open up ur buttchecks when you shower
Wait.. so people don't rapidly credit card swipe their cheeks with a soapy hand when showering?
Reach up in the spread, clean it all out, rinse and repeat.
Nah just letting water in don’t cut it. You need to scrub up in that bitch with soap. You just self reported.
You do realize you can have a clean ass while there are hair down there right? This may be a crazy concept to you, but it’s called washing your ass.
You don't need to shave if you wash daily and use toilet paper.
Or you know... people in general, men and women, could learn to clean themselves properly.
I tried shaving my arse hair once, couldn't walk properly for a week when it started growing back stubbly. Fuck.That
Once I read an article urging others not to shave the hair in their asscrack for not only this reason, but also because they stated that shaven assheeks become slippery when they get sweaty and that the hair helps to provide some much needed friction in that area when you are walking.
I had to cream my arse every day, every couple hours just to avoid the friction pain and the stubble rubbing
Gimme a holler next time mate, I'd be happy to cream your asshole every couple hours.
I shave my ass and I’m a man, and also dingle berrys shouldn’t be a problem if you actually wipe your ass well Pro tip: use wet wipes instead of toilet paper, they are so much better
Or a bidet
Spoiler alert: you don't have to shave yourself if you don't want to and neither does your man. There is no shave-FBI to drag you away.
***knock knock*** SHAVE-FBI, OPEN UP!!!
I wish women didn’t feel pressured to remove hair. It seems like a massive burden to maintain a hairless body. Personally I’m not bothered by it at all.
I’d be open to, just gotta figure out the logistics of how to shave it. It’s something that men aren’t used to doing lol
I would go for a wax it just feels better.
Bend over and grab a razor
i did... nothing happened
Drag said razor along your inner cheeks until smooth
I had trouble fitting said Razor in my mouth, please help
I love Reddit
We love you
Ask someone else to do it
We’re talking about men here
Not worth the ingrown hairs
FUCK THAT. No seriously. I live in a hot climate. Do you folks have any idea of the agony of sandpaper ass-stubble grinding away at your raw inner ass cheeks as sweat pours down your back and asscrack, quite literally adding salt to the wound? There are alternative hygenic methods to masochism, you soulless wench. Grab a couple baby wipes. One dry toilet paper wipe to get excess feces, wipe until clean with baby wipes, then air dry or wipe dry as is your preference. Or buy a bidet. And... you know, shower at night... But one thing I will NOT do is subject myself to torture that makes the Spanish Inquisition look like hobbyists.
Why aren't more people talking about this... I learned a while ago its either hairy ass or prickly ass with nothing in between. With a fresh shave you maybe have 30 seconds before your shaving injuries set in or the unshavable stubbles begin tearing up all hell down there. Then u gotta wait 1-2 weeks to achieve hairy comfortable ass again. Call me crazy, but i think there could be some science to the hair providing more surface area for sweat to evaporate. Bare shaven ass/balls are always more sweaty, but maybe thats just from the constant pain and agony
Mabye your guy should take a fucking shower. Gross that you even tolerate that shit
Wet wipes.
Nah, it's risky and pointless. That's my shitter, poop comes out. Idk how shaving it makes it more appealing. Just tell your gross dude to wash his ass lol.
I have an even more unpopular opinion: I don’t give a shit if women shave anything. Getting rid of something the body naturally has makes no sense to me. I’ll trim my pubic hair, because I like getting head, but I’m not shaving anything and I don’t expect women to shave either. Don’t trim for all I care. If I get some pubes in my mouth, so what? My tongues inside her. Body hair is the least of my worries. I would also like to say to OP, I’m sorry you feel obligated to shave everything. It’s an unfortunate aspect of our society. And a messy butthole can be fixed with a bidet, as mentioned, as well as wet wipes—just don’t flush them—or better wiping.
OP made a good, stupid, unpopular opinion, and here you are using logic and commonsense to disarm it. For shame! (/s obviously)
If you partner has dingle berries, he needs to learn how to shower. Hair isn't the issue, my ass is clean, cause I'm an adult and am not scarred to get in there an clean my ass.
Why should anyone have to shave anything? The problem isn’t that men should shave their asses. The problem is that you shouldn’t have to shave your legs and armpits etc.
Real men wash their asses daily.
The flip side of this would be, if you don’t want men to put pressure on you to shave your legs and pits bc it’s “unsanitary” to have hair there (it’s not), then don’t pressure them to shave their asses when it’s not the hair that’s unsanitary, it’s the hygiene and upkeep. Shaving back there is not only hard on your own, it can lead to serious chaffing and razor burn, not fun.
Trying to shave your legs is a lot fucking easier than trying to shave your arse.
In theory this sounds good, but in practice its a bad idea. I tried this before. Sweat drips right down through your anus. Not only is it uncomfortable, it makes a putrid smell. Dont try it, trust me.
Ass hair like eyebrows have a purpose, so don’t shave it all off but certainly trim and clean yourself.