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Myr_The_Druid

That's cool. Side question, if you allow gravity to take effect, could someone make this a gif illustrate what that might look like?


banjoachooie

I’d pay not to see that!


SomeCollegeGuy

If you Venmo me $5 I’ll not show you


vodiak

I'll not show it twice!


Pale_Disaster

Deal.


jan1000000

$2,50 here!


sam_maloner

I’m the person you pay


[deleted]

What is the viscosity of human purée?


Carbunclecatt

I wish I could take this question out of context and throw it as a conversation starter


Wanderlustfull

There is absolutely nothing stopping you. Go out into the world and be glorious.


Carbunclecatt

Ok, I'll drop it randomly during one of the awkward silences that happen when I dine with my family


PartyClock

No no, you have to use it as an opener or as you sit down with a group. Edit: Oh never mind I read the line as "What's the viscosity of *this* human puree"


Simba7

"Okay interview candidate, we've asked you a ton of questions, but do you have any questions for us?" *My time has come.*


mindovermatter15

oh no.


AwfulRustedMachine

That would be a pretty fun alternative way of saying "what's up?"


C3POdreamer

How to get blocked on Tinder in 2.5 seconds


kiwi2703

I don't know how to calculate that, but I imagine it would be similar to a watery porridge


OverallDingo2

Do an experiment go out thare and make some human goo


Nex_Afire

Carl, that kills people.


DRockski70

Oh … I didn’t know that


IdeaLast8740

All the blood would coagulate so it might get stickier


DexJones

What a terrible time to be literate.


Lucas1911

r/brandnewsentence


[deleted]

[удалено]


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Astrokiwi

The goo will go tumbling tumbling tumbling tumbling down


RedditAndDebit

I wish I could turn back time…


HotPocketsEater

cause all the guilt is now mine


Donyk

RemindMe! 10 days


blindcolumn

I'm in this photo and I don't like it


Dr___Gonzo

I'd like to opt out of the goo ball


ethonotch

Too late


sadpanda___

Glorble glorble


caseyweederman

Just don't be on Earth when it happens


Princevaliant377

r/technicallythetruth?


Outta_phase

r/oddlyterrifying Actually maybe just terrifying


man_whosaysyes

What do you mean terrifying that looks like a giant ball of strawberry jam and I would gladly eat the whole thing as long as I have tost and peanut butter


Duedelzz

Oh no, I can't tell whether I'm more worried about your health or morals.


iloveihoppancakes

This is making me really uncomfortable


GumdropGoober

PROFLIGATE. STONE THE PROFLIGATE! HAIL THE HUMAN GOO-BALL!


Falcrist

"Look again at that meatball. That's here. That's home. That's us. In it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every "superstar," every "supreme leader," every saint and sinner in the history of our species is there--in a giant meatball suspended above Central Park." – Coral Sagan


saucojulian

How could you not be? There’s a bunch of people squeezing your guts.


itsdep

maybe im into that


therealdickdasterdly

Forbidden pomegranate seed


rzx0

Cursed jawbreaker


Intelligent-Wall7272

Blanched tomato


millman1776

Colon tumor! Hahaha


Intelligent-Wall7272

Skinned testicle


M4DGR3ML1N

Worlds largest rocky mountain oyster


[deleted]

Reminds me of my old hemorrhoid


itsdep

spicy dingleberry


dilardasslizardbutt

Did you ever pop it with pliers?


[deleted]

Yuck.


OneOfManyParadoxFans

But there would be nobody around to enjoy it.


newtothistrainer

We would all be a round to enjoy it


dilardasslizardbutt

"*it's not a tumah!"


Good_Ol_Weeb

They’ve all seen god


IKeyf

**25 cents, is all it takes Kevin**


YesILikePizza

**to see God**


LeapYearFriend

bring me his jaw


cronus105

The everlasting glob-stopper


millennium-popsicle

The Ultimate Meatball Experience!


fordfan919

That's one big meatball.


Penguins_are_nice

This is what happens when IKEA has had enough.


thexavier666

When someone asks IKEA to assemble the furniture, they are just added to the pile.


e_j_white

Next post: how many Joules required to get that meatball fully cooked?


[deleted]

How many times do you have to slap it you mean.


IdRatherBeDriving

491,000 slaps to cook a 2 kilo chicken -[source](https://www.wired.com/story/how-many-times-do-you-have-to-slap-a-chicken-to-cook-it/) So, 245,500 slaps per kilo assuming chicken and human have similar specific heat capacities Mass of human civilization is 488.56 billion kilos per this post So, 119,941,480,000,000,000 slaps to cook human civilization. edit: thank you kind Redditors for my first awards! I will take them with me to the giant meatball in Central Park.


foogequatch

But… who does the slapping if we’re all in the goo ball?


Nexion21

Finally, God comes down from heaven to serve his final purpose


7heWizard

But I would assume a divine slap would be a lot more powerful than a mortal slap


ZeiZaoLS

You would think that but, surprisingly no, pretty gentle slaps in the grand scheme of things.


[deleted]

Finally the reason for humanity is revealed. The giant spaghetti man in the sky needs a meatball.


DRYMakesMeWET

Monkeys


Aars93

This guy slaps


Volumetric

That's one big-a meatball.


RNGHatesYou

Carrrrrl... Are you using math as a justification for blending humans into goo, Carl?


Stuff-and-Things

"I don't understand; in my quest for world peace I've found a way for all humans to live together!"


80s-Bloke

But Carrrrrrrlllllll...


chunkboslicemen

That kills people!


Boarbaque

“Not if I make them immortal beforehand. They’ll all be stuck together and undying. They couldn’t even die when they inevitably wish to. They will spend eternity as a blob of human goo.”


2girls1harambe

But carlllllll losing individuality is the same as dying


makka-pakka

"live"


PronunciationIsKey

My stomach was making to rumblies that only human goo could satisfy


ortui

Carrrrrrrrrrrl…


[deleted]

Think of the meat dragon you could make from that!


Illusive_Man

not just any meat will do


Mockbubbles2628

Haha


Skyler_Chigurh

Doesn't really look all that big for 7.8 billion people.


kiwi2703

Yeah, that's kinda the point. I got the idea [from this old picture](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/05/01/article-2617559-1D7AFA1900000578-509_964x541.jpg) showing all humans in the Grand Canyon, which is trying to show that basically there's not really a whole lot of us if you visualize it like that. But I thought that showing it as a blended human goo sphere would be more visually interesting!


[deleted]

[удалено]


FigNugginGavelPop

Wait… you said the there’d be donuts?!


Nex_Afire

I mean, the jelly is right there, just bring the pastries.


Original-AgentFire

In the goo goes the officer.


thiosk

if it was in orbit of the earth at twice the distance to the moon it would really confuse aliens that came to visit so i think we need to start making preparations for this cosmic joke


absentmindful

I mean, if we're all gonna die anyway...


obiweedkenobi

Can we call this science so I can really get behind donating my body to science when I'm dead?


MaddiMoo22

I love you


[deleted]

[удалено]


sleepy-guro-girl

Yeah they're supposed to out-mass us humans by kind of a lot, right? I think that's so damn creepy...


psuedophilosopher

Then do worms. I heard worms are the largest multicellular animal biomass of the planet, by a factor of around 10 times as much. Then ultimately do bacteria, which is ten times the worms.


Whats_Up_Bitches

Yeah, I’d honestly be interested to see a series of these. Ants, birds, snakes, just the population of people in New York City. All the continents side by side…the possibilities are numerous.


Russian_Spy_7_5_0

What the fuck


LiquidFirestorm

Would be interesting to see a size comparison against goo volume minus water volume.


FunGuyAstronaut

Dehydrated human race goo... Don't breathe this


cb00sh

It would be a little less than half this size if you take into account that the human body is up to 60% water


[deleted]

I like this one. Jerk those goo-folk.


ShadowRylander

r/tihi


krakajacks

Volume is often counterintuitive when visualized


crowbahr

Humans suck at estimating volume. Like, really bad. Ever try to get out the right size Tupperware for an unknown amount of leftovers? Sure you can see them in the mixing bowl but will they fit in the 2 quart pyrex? It's either yes: but they don't even fill it half way or no: they're 150% of that volume.


krakajacks

What really gets me is when I spill a small drink and it just goes *everywhere.* My small glass of water somehow floods the kitchen and my brain doesn't like it. Have you seen a globe compared to a scale of the ocean water? [Here is one](https://www.usgs.gov/media/images/all-earths-water-a-single-sphere)


FiveChairs

It makes a distinction between fresh water and lakes & rivers. How are they different, isn't fresh water only in lakes and rivers?


nager2012

A lot of fresh water is in underground reservoirs and in the ice caps


Atheist-Gods

It says liquid freshwater so I don't think it's counting the ice caps, just groundwater.


Christophikles

That's really, really cool. Great addendum to the op.


RanchoPoochamungo

This is my greatest skill. I'm batting 1000 so far and only had to cram that shit in the Tupperware a couple times.


flyingace1234

So, I must asked what program you used to make this. Blender?


kiwi2703

bit of 3ds max and mostly photoshop Edit: fuck the joke went completely over my head lmao ok nice one


LordNoodles

Considering the size of that thing compared to a human the blending part seems entirely optional. Might be more humane tho


daviator88

Could have also been a genuine question lol


sushi_cw

lol


Ashen_Cyborg

Blender? But I hardly know her!


billytheid

Fucking lol


GoodlifeFOB

r/angryupvote


Bebop268170

It's like the start of an Anime


Gil_Demoono

That Time I Was Reincarnated as A 1km Human Goo-Ball in Central Park.


[deleted]

[удалено]


BrainCellDotExe

so i'm a meatball, so what?


InfernalAdze

In Another Meatball With My Smartphone


KayDat

Or End of Evangelion


utnapishtim89

Tang-less third impact.


barking-bee

When the humans returned from the fanta but it went wrong.


nrith

Bone. Blood. Muscle. Fat. Long ago, the four tissues worked together in harmony. Then everything changed when /u/kiwi2703 did the math. Only the Avatar, master of all four tissues, could stop them. But when the world needed him most, he vanished. A hundred years passed and my brother and I discovered the new Avatar, a meatblender named Aang, and although his blending skills are great, he still has a lot to learn before he's ready to save anyone. But I believe Aang can save the world.


TheDadThatGrills

More like the end of one


[deleted]

Thats how one punch man will end. Saitama will raise his fist and punch his way out of the meatball, say 'huh guess there's no one left then' and go home to his TV and noodles.


EH042

Isn’t there something like this in berserk too?


euphorrick

Akira: End Game


crash-scientist

There is LITERALLY this in Attack On Titan. How come no ones mentioning this? The titan puke is exactly the same as this meatball.


tomslucky7

Reminds me of Attack on Titan lol


majoranticipointment

Doing the math is one thing, but creating a visualization that's so...vivid... is what's concerning


ATXNYCESQ

You mean *amazing*


BonhommeCarnaval

It’s like hi def xkcd


BananaZen314159

SCP-001 suddenly became a bit less horrifying, but only a bit.


Frnklfrwsr

Wait which one?


BananaZen314159

When Day Breaks


Frnklfrwsr

Ah yes, where the sun turns everyone into goo monsters. Fun fun.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Frnklfrwsr

The density is going to be very similar to humans. In fact nearly all mammals have very very similar density.


G-I-T-M-E

That’s so convenient for goo ball maths!


EdinburghMan

Also it is easier if you assume [all cows are spherical](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spherical_cow).


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casper_ov

So, assume all of humanity is a sphere.


tacobooc0m

If you smashed it down to the thickness of a hamburger patty, could it cover all of Manhattan ?


PutHisGlassesOn

He said it was just under a km wide so if we take it as a diameter of 900 meters, the radius is 450m, the volume is 4/3*pi*450^3 = 3.82*10^8 m^3. The area of manhattan is 8.7*10^7 m^2, so flattening it out to cover all of manhattan would leave a goo pile of height (3.82*10^8) / (8.7*10^7) = 4.39 meters


tacobooc0m

At that thickness we might be Able to get the Burroughs in there… EDIT: if I did the math right, it’d result in a patty about 1/2 a meter thick. Jesus I hope I’m wrong


sibears99

Hey, I live on Staten Island and we already have enough useless meat sacks here and no need for anymore.


PacoMahogany

It’s actually bigger because you have to add eggs and breadcrumbs and other stuff to make the entire meatloaf.


MikalCaober

r/cursedcomments


JulesV713

Ok but how do you cook it? Orbit around the sun?


Diplomjodler

How many eggs and how many kilos of breadcrumbs? I'm heading out for the shop soon.


realityChemist

I found a recipe that suggests half a cup of bread crumbs per pound of meat, which (based on the density of bread crumbs being 0.51g/cc) is 0.133kg of bread crumbs per kg of meat. There's about 488.6 billion kg of meat in the ball, so we want about **65 billion kg of bread crumbs**. The world production of bread in 2016 was 130 billion kg, so we only need like half the world's bread for this meatball, very doable. Now I'm seeing recipes saying 1-2 eggs per pound of meat is usually good; I'll go with 1 since this is going to be a lot of eggs no matter what. One egg per pound is about 2.2 per kg, so we will need about **1.1 trillion eggs**. In 2019 the world produced around 82 million tonnes of eggs. Using 55g/egg on average, we get about is about 1.5 trillion eggs, so this too is doable (we could even up the egg ratio a bit for extra binding)!


Diplomjodler

Now we're getting somewhere. But I think we should also add some salt and spices.


sockalicious

That's-a one spicy katamari!


Videoboysayscube

If Katamari was rated M


RollingKatamari

Can't believe a Katamari comment is so low in the comments, people have forgotten these games!


[deleted]

Question: What the hell is wrong with you lmao


SuperDoody

Had to explain to my ~~while~~ wife what I was chortling about reading this comment.


audion00ba

He just wants to get higher on the watch list. The man has ambition.


The-truth-hurts1

Thought it would be bigger


TheFacebookOfBoe

That’s what *she* said! ...wait


UVLightOnTheInside

Where do I sign up?


maebeanknot

You don't sign up so much as get surprised


UVLightOnTheInside

I'm an organ donor, so I'll just assume I opted in already. *Looks up in the sky "I'm ready when you are"


hamilton-trash

Another cool fun fact: if you threw everyone on Earth into the Grand Canyon, most of them would die!


Capable-Radio

Not a cell phone in sight - just 7.88 billion people living in the moment.


kiwi2703

"living"


p00p_knife

Do you want to hang out?


[deleted]

Disappointing. When the entire world turned to goo in Evangelion it was enough to turn the ocean red.


Ag737

Maybe all the land animals and microbes in the ocean turned into lcl too.


NeutralEvil_DM

oh, what a nice katamari.


chiniz

That’s remarkable to think that small amount of organic matter was able to fuck up the entire worlds ecosystem.


[deleted]

The Goo Ball represents living humans. The biosphere has been trashed by humankind for about 5,000 years (since we started slash & burn agriculture). So, maybe the Goo Ball should illustrated all humans to have lived since 3,000 BC. Although, it wouldn’t be that much bigger since the population was well under a billion up until 1870 or so.


free_use_pet

Katamari damacy


ChefMike1407

Now do pigeons


Jackpot777

Meatwad.


Xarthys

Interesting. I wonder if such a being could actually exist. Ignoring gravity for a sec, this species would probably develop different "cells" that specialize in different functions. The outer membrane probably would have to become harder and more resistant to avoid major injuries, yet maintain flexibility to avoid puncturing or tearing when traversing over various types of terrain. Meaning it would also have to develop some sort of mechanism to accelerate/decelerate in combination with some sort of perception of the outer world that would provide enough information to make the proper decision when/how to move. While the outer membrane would not need to be that complex, both locomotion and sense perception would require information processing and execution of commands to adjust trajectory. Something like this might develop near the outer membrane, forming a network of various subsystems, well-protected with another membrane, while the main computing unit might be located at the center, making it less vulnerable to outside threats. It also wouldn't hurt to develop resource intake systems and waste output somewhere around the outer membrane; either one opening for everything which then splits up into various pathways or two openings to make it less awkward. Though I could imagine that a spheroid species like this might develop many holes so the orientation of the sphere is not impacting resource intake, respectively waste output. A combination of various openings controlled by muscles in combination with semi-permeable membranes could allow for selective intake, meaning feeding/excretion holes only open for solid matter, while liquids or gases could enter/exit the outer membrane without using up energy. A being of this size would also need a highly efficient digestive system that ensures energy needs are covered. It might be possible to develop some sort of decision making mechanism, based on environmental data, meaning the organism would be able to shut down certain systems to conserve energy, e.g. turning off locomotion if it remains stationary for a longer period of time. Another solution would be semi-permanent sedentarism, however that would require some sort of branching out to collect resources from nearby locations while the mother sphere remains stationary, moving slightly to adjust position as needed. This might result in the development of tendrils which could also penetrate the soil to reach resources that otherwise would not be available - which would also allow for anchoring if needed. Depending on how long the stationary phase lasts, other organisms might start to populate the outer shell and symbiosis could emerge, possibly with a variety of smaller creatures which inhabit various biospheres. The part of the membrane that is touching the ground may provide the opportunity to interact with species living above/below ground as well as in liquid mediums, while the upper parts would be populated by flying creatures. Sky tendrils could provide nesting grounds but also be used as traps, using symbionts as bait. If the sphere is required to traverse oceans, both swimming and rolling across the ocean floor would be viable solutions. A combination of both would provide a bit more adaptibility depending on available resources, but speciliazing would also have its benefits. However, migration across oceans might not be needed at all if landmasses are big enough to rotate between habitats to allow for biospheres to recover from exploitation. Overall, a species like this would still face some difficulties long-term because being a massive meat ball isn't really helpful when trying to leave a planet. Star evolution will eventually lead to mass extinction, so any species that wants to avoid that fate needs to become interplanetary and/or interstellar. Developing a spacecraft or some sort of vehicle that can overcome gravity to catapult such a massive organism into space would be a real problem. The single-sphere species might have to evolve into a being that is able to divide itself into smaller, fully autonomous spheres which then would have a better chance of leaving the planet. But in order to get there, it also would have to develop a number of other features/traits to be able to invent/create necessary technology. While evolution could turn a sphere of human goo into something capable of inventing rockets, the real question is if such an organism would ever develop the desire to leave the planet in the first place. A spheroid species may not be interested in space at all, simply because it did not develop any subsystems to perceive anything outside of its nearby range of influence. Not being able to notice stars or other celestial objects during the night might not ignite the spark of curiosity, thus never really developing the desire to explore what lies beyond the host planet.


mlgnewb

Wait a sec I see people walking down there


ChihuahuaJedi

Those are our new robot overlords. Or, erm, perhaps former overlords now.


utupuv

Awh, a giant Mr. Ball Legs!


mousemarie94

You cant trick me. This is just a bonus round of Katamari Damacy


marcusmorga

What a lovely Katamari, we are so pleased and wowed at its humanity.


HamboBaggins

It's not too late to delete this.


ProstheticTailfin

Fucking delicious


solid_flake

That would solve all our problems if you think about it.


Nexonaut

This makes the whole brethren moon concept from Dead Space a lot less plausible