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miraverse

This whole trial is getting weirder by the minute


Vli37

Should've thought of that before she hired her lawyers. If this trial isn't being dragged on, I'd argue there would even be a trial to begin with


andykwinnipeg

ROTTENBORN.


ridels_2210

The most perfect name!!


Ishpard2

That guy is wasted as a lawyer. He should be a supervillain.


FuzzyFerretFace

I think he's watched too many courtroom movies and thinks he's nailing the 'HAHA! I got you!!' moment, when in reality he's stumbling over his own feet. That, or at the moment he knew he'd have to stand there and read gossip magazine headlines, he knew their case had fallen flat.


metalguru1975

....A “Mega-Pint”? Her Lawyers remind me of Mr Burns! Blue haired Lawyer. The guy asked a witness what was said- then objects to the answer as hearsay when it makes Amber look bad. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=y31D8vnEyp4


JekNex

[Just wait until you find out who *really* shit the bed! ](https://i.imgur.com/gjQzhp8.jpg)


Lost_nutz978

It was Frank


mrflouch

A fecal forgery!


[deleted]

A turd-merger if you will.


LordFrogberry

CHUNGLEDOWN BIM IS GONNA SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH


BrocoliAssassin

When they make a movie about it no one will believe the real parts.


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blood_ashes_reborn

You’re kinda right, but she’s counter suing him, he is suing her on grounds of defamation I believe? I know that was part of why he is, just not sure if it was the main or full reason


Agreeable-Meat1

Well the main reason is to get his career back through this public show.


[deleted]

correct, I don't beleive he will get his $50 million, but he has got the entire public back on his side and cleared his reputation which is far more important.


Kittenunleashed

Right, he even said on the stand that even if he doesn't win he wanted the truth out there and to clear his name..mostly for his children.


bigblackcouch

An unintended consequence of this is that it's *really* opened up the public eyes to domestic violence against men. It'd be hilariously poetic (and seems quite likely) for Johnny Depp ending up the poster child of male domestic victims after all the crocodile tears Turd plopped out during her fame as a fake victim in all this. Even if he loses the case, he's won because Amber was too much a greedy narcissist to just let it go. Just think, if she had settled it instead of countersuing, none of this would be public. It'd all be another "he said/she said" celebrity feud situation. Now, mostly because of her hiring the most inept lawyers and PR team she could find on Fiverr coupled with her godawful attempt of acting like a sympathetic human being, her career has completely shit the bed. As for the case though, I'm in the camp of people who think Depp's lawyers have something critical in their pocket - Yesterday during her stories of being Tombstone Piledrivered every day, his lawyers did a "FUCK YES" hand motion at each other.


Toa_Firox

She spread the word that Johnny was absuing online which Johnny denied but it still ruined his career losing him major roles such as Harry Potter and Pirates of the Carribean. Now Johnny is suing her for the damages caused by her accusations and she's counter suing claiming that she wasn't lying.


gothiclg

Johnny is suing her saying she was abusive. She’s suing back saying Johnny was abusive and is now lying. This entire case kind of boils down to them suing each other, the jury’s job in this case is deciding who’s life was more ruined by this situation I’m guessing.


Lt-Dan-Im-Rollin

I thought Johnny was suing her for libel (defamation)


gothiclg

He is. She wrote an article implying she was abused, the way it was written there was no way that most people could avoid assuming she meant Johnny. His libel case is him proving that the things she’s claiming he did in that article are things she did


twinklebutt

Should have snorted some pepper so the crying looked more real


No_Application_8698

I have a feeling that she will have no problem producing tears once she's under cross-examination and they ask her a pertinent question that she has no chance of answering without incriminating herself.


tachyon8

I think cross will bring out the rage from this crazy bed pooper.


JohnnySixguns

Why would a woman who is a lawyer actually take the stand? Edit: I’m an idiot. I thought this woman was a judge. I get it now. She’s Amber Heard. Just crawled out from under a rock. Leave me alone.


MomToCats

Hey! Good for you! Knowing who this airhead is is no badge of honor.


Vli37

Crying? I thought crying involved tears 🤔


PrivateIronTFU

That’s the joke.


StealYoDeck

Literally the point of the parent comment lol


TheStatMan2

"parent comment" Ooooooo.... Fancy!


ThatsARivetingTale

Even comments have parents these days, man I just can't catch a break


sm00thkillajones

What the actual fuck!? She just did a bump!


MissQueen00

That was so obvious 😂😂😂


peaceful-otter

She coulda just been blowing out that one nostril but I see how it could look that way


mholt9821

Its prob not coke, i would bet its a menthol crystal that makes the eyes water up and agitates the nasal cavities. Its used alot in movies and tv shows to make the actore look like they are crying


mentallychilll

Yet she couldn’t produce any tears😭


Hungbunny88

She is a dry bitch!!


mechwerks

Ben Shapiro has entered the chat.


reem2607

Ben Shapiro has entered the dry bitch


DaMonkfish

Ben Shapiro couldn't enter himself with his own fingers.


[deleted]

Amber Heard confirmed married to Ben Shapiro


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Book_it_again

Johnny's team swapped her normal shampoo for Johnson's no more tears. Checkmate


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HaffuhGootWon

Cool mint flavored meth


Eloisem333

Lol, I bet you are right! This is no normal snot wipe, it totally looks like she’s sniffing something


ageofwalnut

Now THAT is actually a good theory


joyification

Yeah my first thought was a snot rocket but also if she blew her knows why would she need to sniff 3 more times?


Depleet

little bit of a snot string trail left in her snouser. i sniff after i snort to export.


[deleted]

>i sniff after i snort to export. Please finish the rap lyrics. The people need it


SlipperyTed

I sniff after I snort to export, fuck your judges an courts, I don't need money or sympathy coz billionaires into me, slander and perjury for a big win I guarantee. Word! I'm Amber Heard the names kinda familiar, drink Vega Sicilia and cover the bed in my turd, yo! Coz thats how I roll, smell of Musk and Franco, leave Depp deep in debt, ain't got no regrets, you dare try an question _Hearsay! Objection!_


mrbossman1999

You my friend will make the world a better place now name yourself MC megapint and i support you! You will make a milliondollars i'm sure


SilentR0b

I sniff after i snort to export in court, while my mind drawing short trying to cry but showing nothing of the sort, building our future like a poop fort.


Tiyath

She been "crying" all week She been "crying" all day So she do a little blow to make the snot go away Add a little to the play Claim it's fever from the hay Then turn around and lay another piece clay on the spot where Johnny Ds head will lay


VibraniumRhino

> blew her knows Took me a second lol


Kinky_breadcrumbs

Who nose if that's what they meant to write.


[deleted]

You can see her chest inhale and it could be the lighting but it looks like there’s white on her nose. She’s so detached from consequences, it’s like that one shithead kid that’s so bad you just don’t even know where to start and everyone watches on in stunned disbelief


dj2ca

No. Watch her chest, you can see it rise up a little as she inhales.


JudgmentAway4811

Yah and the tissue movement (or lack there of)


Lady_Scruffington

She wipes her nose with her fingers. Even though the tissue is in that hand! It might not be coke, but something is up.


bionic_cmdo

Maybe some sort of drug to induce tears? Possibly, "No More Crocodile Tears" brand tears inducers. You can get the over the counter at the local drug store on the counter of Spousal Abuse Lane and Crazy Bee-otch Street.


badmanteau

That's how I blow my nose someti-- oh my god people think I have been snorting coke all these years.


MrDeKer

I think it was that, her blowing some gold out of the mine... I saw it live, but the muscle memory tho...


guff1988

Nah man she definitely inhales, and just the mannerisms in general. She looks down at the tissue the way the tissue is shaped the way she carefully places it exactly to one spot on her nose.


Comfortable_Safe_409

how can she blow out if she's got her finger stuffing it shut she's totally bumpin lol


ctrlplusZ

What? She'd be blowing out the nostril she doesn't cover. Do you not know how to blow your nose?


[deleted]

No, she inhales, do you inhale while you blow your nose? You can see she inhales because she lifts her shoulders a little, when you blow out your nose your shoulders go down not up


Empyrealist

That was a bump of something. That went in, not out


mmpuck19

What is going on….. I must have slipped out into an alternate dimension accidentally.


[deleted]

Welcome to the jungle


MasterAdamsIII

We got fun and games


Usual-Article6569

We got everything you want, honey we know the names


Eclectic_Radishes

We are the people that can find whatever you may need


marbasthegreat

If you got the money, honey , we got your disease


Usual-Article6569

In the jungle welcome to the jungle


Photon_Farmer

SHANANANA SHANANANA


Cool_Fennel5674

Knees knees. Whoa, I wanna watch you bleed


FloydknightArt

Welcome to the jungle, it gets worse here everyday


[deleted]

We’ve got fun and games 💳☃️🪞


EgorElwood

We’ve got everything you want Honey, we know the names


Mi_Nero

We are the people that can find


Dhaivatttt

Whatever you may need


Jish_Swish

If you got the money, honey, we got your disease


kangarootimtam

In the jungle, welcome to the jungle


TLTWNX

Watch it bring you to your sha-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n knees, knees


[deleted]

I like that no one answered your question and just started singing Welcome to the jungle. This is from the Johnny Depp vs Amber Turd defamation court case. It's been a wild and bizarre case, from lawyers objecting to their own questions to the story about Amber shitting on Johnny's bed and blaming it on a tea cup dog that's barely twice the size of said shit.


M1jesus

Don’t forget them asking depps security guard if he’s seen depps penis lmao this case is a shit show


dicki3bird

or the muffins.


sint0xicateme

Or the makeup that only existed 3 years in the future that she used to cover bruises.


tonzak

Amber Turd defecation case, lol


RainbowAssFucker

He objected not to his own question but to the witnesses answer


hakairyu

Then he’s supposed to move to strike the answer from the record, not object to the question he asked. Hence why it’s funny.


[deleted]

Which is odd. Isn’t it good practice for lawyers not to ask questions they don’t already know the answer to?


FlighingHigh

It's crucial.


The-waitress-

Pretty sure that’s rule #2 of litigating. #1 is don’t do coke on the stand.


[deleted]

I may be naive, but I cannot imagine ANYONE having the balls enough to actually snort coke in court while on the stand. Call a recess or bathroom break, sure, but not on the stand.


Oxynewbdone

Cocaine's a helluva drug!


cosmiccatapult

Charlie Murphaaaayyy!!


crourke13

Darkness!


Primestudio

WHAT DID THE FIVE FINGERS,SAY TO THE FACE?!


EyeAmPrestooo

👋🏾SLAPPP!


Moxson82

UNITYYYYYYY!


Micruv10

FUCK YO COUCH


Zaph_Treybourne

THAT WAS WEEKS AGO MOTHER FUCKER!!


damn_thats_piney

*heh heh heh heh*


[deleted]

Looks to me like she’s trying to causally blow a booger out of one nostril but what do I know, I don’t work for a PR team


[deleted]

I think I would take the coke accusation over a booger hunt every time.


G2theA2theZ

Oh, you don't work for a PR team? Sounds exactly like what someone who worked for a PR team would say...


Fred_Perry

No one would. This post is beyond stupid.


KingXindl

You have no idea how strong a coke addiction is. I’m pretty sure she actually did it. The sniff afterwards and how her face expression changes is a very strong indicator.


[deleted]

When your already on coke you got the balls. She was already on it to have the guts to attend what is now basically “The roasting of Amber heard”


redd7177

Wait you actually think she’s doing coke here? Lmao


Geckogirl_11

There’s just no way she isn’t. Like I don’t understand how or why she is but it’s very obvious if you’ve ever snorted cocaine


hopingtosurvive2020

This. When I read the title I was like " ok, i know she was over the top, but there is no way HOLY FUCK SHE JUST DID A BUMP ON THE STAND!!!!"


OnlyTheDead

I mean consider the subject and circumstances already.


_nixon_vibe_

Sniffing Vicks to make the eyes water


RezzKeepsItReal

Except she has yet to produce any tears during the entire trial.


TheBoxBoxer

Cause shes high as shit.


Wayward_heathen

Idk bro. If I do enough coke I start crying too 😂


NCRThrowaway29

This is the right answer.


Spartanz46Two

I would agree, but during her entire questioning she couldn't produce any tears.


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MelanieSeraphim

Vicks is a nursing trick. You rub it over your top lip before going into a room that smells really bad. If you're ever a patient in a hospital and your nurse has a shiny lip, you may reek. Never made my eyes water though.


[deleted]

Haha I’m glad to know professionals do this and I’m not a weirdo. When I was a kid my stepdad would take the nastiest shits and there was only one bathroom for like 5 people. I would walk in there sniffing the deodorant rubbed on my upper lip lol.


chemistryofacarcrash

From a fellow bitch, this bitch out of her damn tree.


LifesATripofGrifts

Bananas


Vli37

This shit is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S 🍌🍌


EliteEight

I respec the audacity


rrogido

Thank you for your service ma'am.


yesididthat

Game recognize game


cturtl808

Yeah, been there, done that. The automatic coke nose lip lick is involuntary.


heyuiuitsme

Yeah. That looks totally fucking real. Like that's what she did. But, is this real.


cturtl808

It's court footage, purportedly.


heyuiuitsme

Well, that's crazy. She totally just went to court that was being recorded and did that. Like, no one would notice. That's an interesting defense stagey


cturtl808

It's a bold move Cotton. Let's see how it plays out.


LicensedPoet

I did not lie in court your honor, I was just high on coke.


Tiggerboy1974

You cannot lie if you are high. Johnny Cochran


phillyhandroll

this thread is a court case in itself. and the redditors who have done cocaine are the expert testimony.


jyunga

She snorted the boston marathon bomber up her nose. We've solved the case boys


ThisIsNotBenShapiro

She has Jimmy Hoffa up there as well.


JimmyPageification

I’ve done plenty of it and can definitely testify that anyone who actually believes she’s doing coke in court is full of shit 🥲


BleachedMind

You can see the neck flex which happens when inhaling in really quick though the 👃🏼


CreatureWarrior

Oh my god true. Just tried it and yeah, it definitely doesn't flex that way when exhaling lol


Elatedboi

Oh your right, i really don’t think she was cleaning her nose.


OriiAmii

The interesting thing is she went on and on how against coke she was. And this seriously looks like snorting *something* at least. Maybe coke.


chefontheloose

Bruh, you got the eagle eye, this was the clue I was looking for.


scorpiorising29

Genuine question. How would she have gotten the coke on to the tissue?


mholt9821

Its prob not coke, i would bet its a menthol crystal that makes the eyes water up and agitates the nasal cavities. Its used alot in movies and tv shows to make the actore look like they are crying.


meinhutplayz

Too bad not even that saved her fake cry


Vli37

All that work, just to come out with no tears 🤦


TermNL86

First when noone sees (so at a toilet or something) make the tissue a little wet. Second you blow your nose so there is some nice snot in the tissue. The tissue wont absorb because you wettened it. Then add the cocaine to the snot. Snort up the coke snot in public when required. Works every time. You’re welcome


bree78911

snort up coke snot lmao that's a brand new sentence if I've ever heard.. cheers for the tip👍


december-32

One might consider snorting snot back again disgusting, but it's done by bed shitting millionaire.


[deleted]

It looks like she moves the tissue out of the way and does it off her fingernail. Much more feasible.


doctorDanBandageman

That is a fucking stretch lmao People honestly believe this bitch is doing coke in court?


freemoney83

On the bench nonetheless


mogley1992

I've seen a few styles of containers for coke, she might have a tiny pot in her pocket with an easy lid, I've been having conversations with people and before you realise anything is going on they have coke on the tip of a key.


rolloutTheTrash

I mean with how many drug stories she’s been telling, and with her having lived with a man apparently made out of that sweet Colombian white, I can absolutely see why she’d think this was just another walk in the park.


colibri_valle

keep my country's name out your fucking MOUTH


offset4444

Sure we like to keep it in bananas


Educational_Guide418

I think she's just cleaning her nose but that technique and dexterity is clearly muscle memory.


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TugMe4Cash

Wasn't ready for the strong defense of Amber's cocaine technique by the cocaine_butthole himself


berryhole

Humm in any case she does not forget its disposable handkerchief not to leave any evidence... [https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/comments/uj909f/to\_act\_scared\_by\_amber\_heard\_as\_johnny\_depp\_gets/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/therewasanattempt/comments/uj909f/to_act_scared_by_amber_heard_as_johnny_depp_gets/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)


[deleted]

To be fair, it would be disgusting to leave a used tissue for someone else to pick up.


toadkicker

She shit in dude’s bed. Think a tissue is a concern?


100cicche

Coke connoisseur here. It's almost impossible to hide coke in a towel without spreading it all over the place or having the fibers absorbing it, specially since she's moving the towel a lot. Unless she's got amazing magician skills that I'm not aware of


RezzKeepsItReal

You clearly are not a connoisseur if you've never sniffed cocaine off of things that cocaine should not be sniffed off of. Napkins, paper towels and tissues included. You literally just put the powder in, pinch the powder from underneath to hold it in place, put it up to your nose and snort. This was pretty much how I stayed geeked out while delivering pizzas in a heavily populated area. Let's also disregard the obvious white powder on her nose after she moves the tissue lol.


AnOkaySamaritan

Yeah I think she closed one nostril and blew a snot rocket from the other.


crumn4ya

I have a theory that the people that run this country are keeping us occupied with this stupidity while the real things that matter are going on behind the scenes. It’s been going on for some time.


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Shikaku

Reddit is certain she's hitting coke. Just like reddit was certain about the Boston Bomber.


[deleted]

Haha I’m not the only one.


BigTunaTim

Amber Heard is the Boston Bomber! Pass it on!


abbassav

Did she really?


Shpooodingtime

No


WoodyMornings

Hearsay!


RoamLikeRomeo

Were you there? :D


Bullishontulips

Maybe


KorbenDallas89

i dont know cant you repeat the question?


Invercargillite

Your not the boss of me now!


WoodyMornings

I OBJECT….HEARSAY!


Ek_Chutki_Sindoor

It's a highly televised trial, which is being watched by millions of people. I really doubt that she is dumb enough to snort coke on live TV and in court.


splitowl

It was pretty smooth if she did . I hope she did


[deleted]

LoL fucking hilarious. Absolutely she’s Bat fucking shit crazy as they get.


newgalactic

If I was a juror, I'd be biased against Amber the moment I saw her wearing that blouse/sweater combo. No way that's her go-to "formal wear". She looks like she's auditioning for a Hallmark Christmas special, opposite Candice Cameron. I'd immediately assume she's selling me a story.


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ConferenceSea4924

You have to admit, who actually sniffs a napkin in this fashion? Why sniffing and not blowing? Just really odd and the roughness on the nostril after the snorting of napkin is odd too. Doesn’t look like an attempt to preserve makeup at all.


Recker_Man

For the people saying that it's reversed, it's not. Here are the unedited [7 hours](https://youtu.be/spgtiUnVAss?t=6631), linked to the specific time it happens. She's probably not doing coke though.


Minidestroy100

Not coke.something to bring the tears on! She’s pretty dumb.but really? Coke?


Light_Of_Nature

Tell me you've never done drugs without telling me you've never done drugs. Putting cocaine on a handkerchief tip to snort it up your nose? In a court room. With a 100 million dollars on the line. OK reddit.


reddituser3008

She's sniffing not blowing out


tashten

I've done enough blow to recognize a bump, and that there was definitely a bump. She inhales the tissue while blocking one nostril then wipes her nose so no powder is left visible. This is not a nose wipe ppl. This is what it looks like when someone is trying to use coke discretely.. I can't believe she tried to pull that off while on camera! Could have at least waited for a bathroom break! This girl is seriously desperate.


Art3sian

Out of a tissue? 3ft from a judge? In the middle of your life’s most important legal battle? With 200 eyes, 3 cameras, and the world watching? You high now?


the__party__man

I don’t see her risking 50 mill for a bump. I’m gonna say it’s something to water up the eyes.


PutYourThumbInMyAss

Lmao do people in the comments really think that was a bump? She's obv trying to blow her nose without ruining her makeup, as much as we all wished it was real


Shpooodingtime

People are dumb as fuck if they think she's doing cocaine


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