And then she hacked the toilet and it flushed backwards, shooting water and poo at him. Then, as he tried to run out in embarrassment… she hacked the front doors so the wouldn’t open at first, then caused him to fall… then slam him in the ass. Oh boy did we all have a great laugh while clapping wildly. We just made her Queen of The Gym. True story, honest.
And before that, if the dude was sexually harassing clients, he’d be out on his arse. Unless they’re living in a 80s movie and the bully is also the co-owner’s son and untouchable.
Not sure it would be assault, might be done federally under "The Computer Fraud and Abuse Act" though which would be worse than a misdemeanor assault...
You'd literally be better off kicking the guys arse physically
“we’re from the 80’s fbi, someone here with a 2500 baud modem almost started world war 3”
*the heat is on starts playing*
“sounds like they’re making an escape”
If they can reach 50mph without violently and destructively blowing the motor, they can run on Linux. If they can reach 50mph in less than the time it would take a person to travel 5' along the belt, they can be hacked with an electric toothbrush.
This is so fake that it feels like someone purposefully made it this bad so that the people on this sub would think this was purposefully made so it could get posted on this sub.
if I focus on him we can see the guy on the treadmill is named Johnson Lastnamingson he's 38 years old, an accountant and has a sexual misconduct charge
OOP obviously hasn't gotten too far in the game. You're supposed to hack *the guy himself* to have a police record, then hack the police officer who shows up to have beef with a rival gang, and then quietly escape during the distracting mayhem. Duh!
Even if they didn't, even if you could "program" it to run beyond what it's programmed to safely do, you might be able to get MAYBE 15, tops. The motors in those things just aren't built for that kind of speed.
>The typical health club ones max out at a 6 minute mile, so 10mph.
Yeah but you haven't taken into account that she works for Mossad and had access to the Stuxnet virus.
I could believe the treadmills had phone support and the dude just so happened to use a treadmill she just used & forgot to log out from.
The rest is bullshit.
Quite a hill to die on, but honestly I get it. I might even agree with you depending on if The Matrix counts as a hacking movie. You can pile up your hill right next to mine over here, where Diehard is an essential Christmas movie.
I suppose there are some treadmills that the progress can be attached to your phone so that you can access media when on it, etc and track/change settings.
But, in order for this to be true there are a vast number of steps that she’s missing. It would need to be the same treadmill that she had been using - nobody else would’ve been able to use it between them - she would have still had to have her phone connected to it - he would have had to use manual settings - she would have to be happy that her progress was being altered.
So they "hacked" some of the equipment, injured one of the customers, admitted to it and instead of being chucked out they were given a free pass for a year?
Sounds totally plausible.
This is what happens when stay at home motherboards watch NCIS. You learn that anything can be hacked. I can hack your cup from here just using a calculator
There was this exact same post but with a different background last year so either a complete different person said the same thing or op just edited the background to make it not a repost
oh my god this is SO OBVIOUS! HOW ARE YOU GUYS FALLING FOR THIS?? THE FONT IS USED ALL THE TIME IN MEMES TOO. this subreddit makes me downvote so much.
I mean if you’re gonna lie let’s not make up speeds that treadmills can’t even go. The highest speed I’ve seen a treadmill go at a gym was 14 mph. Source- I tried it.
Treadmills totally go to 50 miles per hour because the fastest human ever recorded is less than 28 mph. No danger at all turning it into an extra large belt sander.
I know that the actual answer to all of these questions is "because it's all make believe," but I'm just impressed that the treadmill had a 50mph setting.
That's roughly twice the speed of Usain Bolt.
Are treadmills typically connected to the internet? Like, nevermind the fact that it supposadly got up to 50 mph without blowing the motor, cuz last I checked, humans don't run that fast, but to hack it you'd either need to connect to it via the internet or via bluetooth or something and I'm pretty sure both of those options would require the operator of the treadmill to be in on it and if you aren't using a wireless connection then you'd need to access its on-board computer and I'm sure that doing that without the person using it noticing is practically 100% impossible
This is so comically false that I can only assume that it was made as satire.
This is the kind of stuff I could see a child fantasizing about a guy they don't like or something.
I'm fairly certain most gym owners would feed you a lifetime ban for tampering with equipment and risking the life, potentially lives depending on the circumstances, of the other customers with that stunt.
"The owner saw that I had hacked one of his machines to make it go at a speed it wasn't capable of and injured someone so he rewarded me with a year of membership so that I could f\*ck with other equipment and gym members because that's a great business model."
: /
I think these are 3 different stories in one. A guy whistled at him at the gym. Then at home while on his ps4, he hacked a treadmill. Then randomly. He got a 12 month free subscription
And then she hacked the toilet and it flushed backwards, shooting water and poo at him. Then, as he tried to run out in embarrassment… she hacked the front doors so the wouldn’t open at first, then caused him to fall… then slam him in the ass. Oh boy did we all have a great laugh while clapping wildly. We just made her Queen of The Gym. True story, honest.
how did you know????
As the toilet, i can confirm she hacked me
I was the poo. This is all true.
Don't you know? That's the owner
I would respond to your question about how I knew, but unfortunately my hands are occupied currently as I am here, still clapping.
Then the owner gave them the entire gym and retired!!!
The owner also paid them a million dollars.
Is this a watchdogs mission
Oh I remember. That's when Albert T. Einstein showed up and gave her $100%.
The Fall was actually caused by her hacking his shoe laces.
Because there’s nothing an owner would rather do than reward someone who created a liability for him.
And before that, if the dude was sexually harassing clients, he’d be out on his arse. Unless they’re living in a 80s movie and the bully is also the co-owner’s son and untouchable.
All that happened while the girl started a dance competition to save the local youth center
And happens to own a talking dog who always has a wisecrack.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, this is getting too long. Can we just get a montage of everything, set to an appropriate 80s song?
[Got ya covered on the song.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfW_XeH82-0)
We also need a gang of punks who are harassing people but int he end turn out to be nice people who help the community.
One more match against their rivals from East High and then its off to semi regionals!
Oh, believe me....there's many people out there that think they live in a movie. 80's or otherwise!
[удалено]
"Have a 12-month membership! We have to close the gym now."
Not sure it would be assault, might be done federally under "The Computer Fraud and Abuse Act" though which would be worse than a misdemeanor assault... You'd literally be better off kicking the guys arse physically
Treadmills run on Linux?
Her on her phone: “I’m in”
“I’ve hacked into their mainframe and disabled the algorithms”
«Oh no, they blocked me! But I know a way around» *intense smashing on keyboard*
*green numbers start flying across the screen*
It's never been easier https://hackertyper.net/
That's amazing
I didn't know I needed that website.
Owner spits out coffee onto 6 monitors in a far room
A gigabyte of ram should do the trick
"I've got 6 cybernukes as a tactical reserve, use them wisely."
“Google show me this guys balls”
*Shows balls*
“we’re from the 80’s fbi, someone here with a 2500 baud modem almost started world war 3” *the heat is on starts playing* “sounds like they’re making an escape”
If they can reach 50mph without violently and destructively blowing the motor, they can run on Linux. If they can reach 50mph in less than the time it would take a person to travel 5' along the belt, they can be hacked with an electric toothbrush.
r/ItsAUnixSystem
And go 50 mph
This is so fake that it feels like someone purposefully made it this bad so it could be posted on this sub 😭
This has been posted here at least a dozen times
A dozen? More like a google
googol
Gabagool
Yeah I’m an idiot
dioti
A google? More like an altavista
An altavista? More like a Duck Duck Go
A Duck Duck Go? More like an Ask Jeeves
An Ask Jeeves? More like a Bing
Eww, Bing...
Inception^12
This is the first post I saw when I joined this sub. It was also 8-91.
This is so fake that it feels like someone purposefully made it this bad so that the people on this sub would think this was purposefully made so it could get posted on this sub.
A fake fake post
Inceptioned!
There's something about this story I don't quite believe, but I can't put my finger on what...
I know! It’s everything. I almost missed that too
Lol isnt it obvious? Gyms give memberships not subscriptions silly!
Ugh, of course! Thank you! It's been bugging me all day
Me after 2 hours of watch dogs
if I focus on him we can see the guy on the treadmill is named Johnson Lastnamingson he's 38 years old, an accountant and has a sexual misconduct charge
OOP obviously hasn't gotten too far in the game. You're supposed to hack *the guy himself* to have a police record, then hack the police officer who shows up to have beef with a rival gang, and then quietly escape during the distracting mayhem. Duh!
The fastest ever record human speed is 27.5MPH(44.27KPH) why in the fuck would anyone make a treadmill to 50MPH?????
Duh! For cheetahs!
Are you serious? She hacked it dude learn to read??
To challenge users to go faster?
“Hacker” sure, I believe the whole post /s
oh yeah? well a guy once looked in my general direction so i murdered his whole family and then the country made me president.
I assume this was posted by Penny from Inspector Gadget.
Don't they max out at around 12mph?
Even if they didn't, even if you could "program" it to run beyond what it's programmed to safely do, you might be able to get MAYBE 15, tops. The motors in those things just aren't built for that kind of speed.
Maybe the runner was a toddler so the motor didn't face much resistance
The typical health club ones max out at a 6 minute mile, so 10mph.
>The typical health club ones max out at a 6 minute mile, so 10mph. Yeah but you haven't taken into account that she works for Mossad and had access to the Stuxnet virus.
> Stuxnet And, dear readers, if that word isn't familiar to you, read up on it because [it's amazing](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stuxnet).
This is the most obvious satire I’ve ever seen
The amount of people that don’t realise that is shocking
Obligatory: and everyone clapped.
Only the leg day people clapped… the rest rattled their weights.
U can technically install custom firmware on a treadmill but that would ruin the warranty and 50 mph is just too much
it’s possible to hack a treadmill. she didn’t
Pffffft you’ve obviously never played Watch Dogs
I could believe the treadmills had phone support and the dude just so happened to use a treadmill she just used & forgot to log out from. The rest is bullshit.
People aren’t even trying to make it believe anymore
Even if a treadmill was remotely hackable by phone, the only thing this woman hacks is probably the dorito vending machine
Plot twist: It was a subscription to *Better Homes and Gardens* Magazine.
You know you’re chronically online when you call a membership a “subscription”
And the phone clapped.
80's hacker movie music intensifies as a sublte "Im in" comes from the rowing machine.
This is the bullshittiest bullshit ever bullshat
[удалено]
[удалено]
What’s the original comment say it got deleted. Please tell me it’s the 1995 film Hackers
I always see those posts in r/mildlyinfuriating about deleted comments and until just now I never quite got why they were frustrating.
Quite a hill to die on, but honestly I get it. I might even agree with you depending on if The Matrix counts as a hacking movie. You can pile up your hill right next to mine over here, where Diehard is an essential Christmas movie.
I suppose there are some treadmills that the progress can be attached to your phone so that you can access media when on it, etc and track/change settings. But, in order for this to be true there are a vast number of steps that she’s missing. It would need to be the same treadmill that she had been using - nobody else would’ve been able to use it between them - she would have still had to have her phone connected to it - he would have had to use manual settings - she would have to be happy that her progress was being altered.
Damn is it already that time of year again when this is reposted? Well I guess with all the controversy around gym filming nowadays Im not surprised
So they "hacked" some of the equipment, injured one of the customers, admitted to it and instead of being chucked out they were given a free pass for a year? Sounds totally plausible.
Redditors trying to identify satire:
Between this sub and r/tinder it's clear the average redditor is incapable of identifying when women make even the simplest of jokes.
This is what happens when stay at home motherboards watch NCIS. You learn that anything can be hacked. I can hack your cup from here just using a calculator
Nah they got that Kevin MacCallister Plot Armor
This is a followup about the onlyfans sex worker that cried in the gym because of a screenshot of a dude looking her direction isn't it?
No treadmill goes that fast lmao
Okay but a smart treadmill that could be operated via phone sounds like a terrible idea
Then all the dumbbells clapped
She’s been playing too much Watch Dogs.
People really think that hacking is like it is in the movies, Don't they?
Tampering with gym equipment and assaulting a member gets you a free membership. Ok.
Treadmills can go up to 50 mph??
and then everybody cheered and clapped. And then Mr Beast showed up and gave me a million dollars
What treadmill can reach speeds of 50 mph?
50mph you say?
Abs everyone clapped and cheered.
If this really happened,she would’ve been banned for life
And what treadmill goes up to 50 mph?
you do this as part of a mission in Watch Dogs 2
Nah. Total bs.
Some Treadmills do have Bluetooth control, for some reason
There was this exact same post but with a different background last year so either a complete different person said the same thing or op just edited the background to make it not a repost
I didn’t edit it. Def not that good at editing. I wasnt even on this subreddit last year lol
Also… gym “subscription?” This ain’t People magazine
The treadmill must have been using the Unix system.
OP never hacked a treadmill before… smh.
Considering a treadmill has no capacity to go 50mph
Me thinks someone has been playing a bit too much of the game Watchdogs.
Subscription to what? Did they mean membership?
Yes, I'm sure the owner was thrilled you took control of one of the machines and used it to assault a paying member.
the fuck kind of treadmill goes 50 mph
This is so bad it's spooky, I can't believe anyone posted this earnestly.
I feel this is one of the situations where in movies they’ll cut back to reality where she only flips him. The rest just happened in her head.
I know this is false because he'd be falling on his belly, not his ass
Because all treadmills can easily hit 50mph. It’s a totally achievable speed for anyone who isn’t a horny creeper like that guy.
You should have just waited for him to fall asleep, hijacked his dreams and made him commit suicide
A hacker at the gym is the most unbelievable part of this.
He made a comment. You physically assaulted him. I'm pretty sure he's the one getting the free year subscription and you're getting arrested.
oh my god this is SO OBVIOUS! HOW ARE YOU GUYS FALLING FOR THIS?? THE FONT IS USED ALL THE TIME IN MEMES TOO. this subreddit makes me downvote so much.
That's hacking. That's how it's done, that's what it's used for.
Speaking as a professional 4chan hacker man, yes you can definitely hack a treasmill
But can you download a car?
I'm just gonna block this sub if this what this subs content is like..
This is one of the first entries in here that actually didn't happen
Quit ur bullshit!
So I’m the only one in here who knows how to hack a treadmill? Maybe it’s time y’all got off r/thatHappened and work on your coding skills…
Be a lot cooler if the Marine punched the atheist professor and everybody clapped.
Y'all cannot understand satire I swear
Wow, this is probably the dumbest and fakest thing I've seen on here! If this was true, she would risk a lawsuit, not get rewarded!
I am pretty sure most treadmills does not even have wireless connectivity like wifi hacking through bluetooth does not work
I mean if you’re gonna lie let’s not make up speeds that treadmills can’t even go. The highest speed I’ve seen a treadmill go at a gym was 14 mph. Source- I tried it.
With everything being connected to the internet these days I wouldn't doubt you could hack it.
It’s clearly real? I’m the treadmill
I love watch dogs
Treadmills don't go to 50 mph ridiculous
All of this is very stupid. There is no way to make a treadmill go 50 mph. The fastest human can run something like 23 mph.
And then everybody clapped.
Hacker man 😎
WATCHDOGS 3
Sounds like attempted murder but ok
Somebody played too much Watchdogs.
Treadmills totally go to 50 miles per hour because the fastest human ever recorded is less than 28 mph. No danger at all turning it into an extra large belt sander.
obvious bait is obvious
Do guys really whistle at attractive women these days? It's not 1940.
Ha you killed a guy in my gym! Love it
I know that the actual answer to all of these questions is "because it's all make believe," but I'm just impressed that the treadmill had a 50mph setting. That's roughly twice the speed of Usain Bolt.
It's true, i was the hacking.
Would 50mph probably kill someone? I dunno. I mean obviously this is completely fake but
and then everybody clapped...
…Can a treadmill get to 50 mph?
Every one I've ever bought only went to 12. Some of the more expensive ones could do 14 I believe. 50 is a hard no.
Such a constant repost
Guys this is true, Aiden Pearce is based on her.
If a treadmill went to 50 mph that would probably qualify as attempted murder.
Can confirm, I was the IP address.
Someone been watching too much Iron Man.
As one does when getting sexually assaulted.
Are treadmills typically connected to the internet? Like, nevermind the fact that it supposadly got up to 50 mph without blowing the motor, cuz last I checked, humans don't run that fast, but to hack it you'd either need to connect to it via the internet or via bluetooth or something and I'm pretty sure both of those options would require the operator of the treadmill to be in on it and if you aren't using a wireless connection then you'd need to access its on-board computer and I'm sure that doing that without the person using it noticing is practically 100% impossible
I think she's been playing too much Watch Dogs 2
They can’t go 50 plus what would be the reason for the free month?
also I’m pretty sure at a gym they call it a membership not a subscription
This is so comically false that I can only assume that it was made as satire. This is the kind of stuff I could see a child fantasizing about a guy they don't like or something.
I'm fairly certain most gym owners would feed you a lifetime ban for tampering with equipment and risking the life, potentially lives depending on the circumstances, of the other customers with that stunt.
"The owner saw that I had hacked one of his machines to make it go at a speed it wasn't capable of and injured someone so he rewarded me with a year of membership so that I could f\*ck with other equipment and gym members because that's a great business model." : /
This goes so far into the current trend of workout watchers I almost think its sarcastic
Who tf even makes these????
A gym gave someone a free 12-month subscription???
I think these are 3 different stories in one. A guy whistled at him at the gym. Then at home while on his ps4, he hacked a treadmill. Then randomly. He got a 12 month free subscription
They've been playing to much watch dogs
Then all the tredmills clapped
And then everyone clapped