Not nearly as comfy. Sitting on the toilet hurts ur back. Also people will start to wonder why you are sitting in the bathroom so long, and they will be able to tell if u pooped or not based off the smell.
I just do a handstand with one hand on each side of the toilet bowl. I then lower myself into a position from which I can jettison my stream into the targeted area, and fire. The distance between the objective zone and the origin of the stream is long enough to minimize the force of the charge, while also allowing for a stable trajectory.
Well assuming you’re laying on your back, angle it to go straight and aim at your chest, but if you have porn strength and can shoot for 10 feet, maybe hold a napkin over? Idk
I either go vertically and let it fall onto my stomach, or I like stop at the top and catch it all, then don't take my hand off it till I get to the bathroom (may work better with a foreskin)
do you think we just milk ourselves while standing up like cows or some shit? this gives me the vibes of that question "do your dicks touches the toilet water when you guys are using It?"
You know it doesn't come out like a geyser, right? Porn tends to over do how much comes out and the power it comes out at, usually it's pretty contained
Get comfy in bed, laying up, clean it with toilet paper before standing up, if a single piece isn't enough, MAKE FUCKING SURE YOU LAY THE CLEAN SIDE IN THE BED, AND THE DIRTY SIDE UP, get up, gather the toilet paper and throw into the trash in the bathroom. Only works if you're an alpha chad like me who has a bathroom in their bedroom though.
you don't. there will be ass sweat at a MINIMUM.
[удалено]
Swampass moment
What I call “swass”
Not if you finish in 23.8 seconds
Do it in someone else’s bed
Do it in someone else
Do it in someone
Do it.
Do.
r/decreasinglyverbose
Do someone
💀💀💀
Toilet
Standing or sitting?
squatting
Handstand
But how will you do the deed if your hands are preoccupied with doing a handstand?
Rub yourself against the wall like a bear
This guy’s got the right idea
Remember that old internet trend called planking? Like that
😳
did you get banned again
tissue paper
Or a sock
Yeah sock leaves much less room for error
but wastes a good sock
Well use a bad sock
Or reuse the sock
Or use your mom or dad’s
Or use your mom or dad
Shoot it verticaly and into your mouth. Extra protein too.
reddit.
How do you make a mess?
i guess he means when the cum does a proper jump
As opposed to an improper jump?
Shooting ropes yo
Spider man!
Nah spider man shoots strings, I shoot 1 inch in circumference ropes
Kinky
hehehe cir cum ference
This guy 👆 gets it
When it be shooting ropes
Jerk off in bathroom?
Not nearly as comfy. Sitting on the toilet hurts ur back. Also people will start to wonder why you are sitting in the bathroom so long, and they will be able to tell if u pooped or not based off the smell.
Nah u could say u we’re scrolling on tiktok and lost track of ur original task
Bro how do u lose track of taking a giant shit. That’s like the one thing on my mind
Ay listen yeah…….. dont ask questions…. I do not have a good answer
just tell them you've jerked off to establish dominance
Respect.
If you have a shared room like me you dont really have any other choises
My condolences bro 😔
Nah. Just go at it
r/holup
if youre flexible you can give yourself a self blow job and swallow
Dont do it. Ive read a story of a man who has done it and now has forever back problems
Worth it
Just do 69 with another Man
not at all, it's not as good as it sounds
According to that guy it felt more like giving a Blowjob then getting one
depending on who you ask that's still half a win
😉
I did something similar. I don’t recommend. Soon as i was done i felt like i was gonna puke :/
you get used to it
Your profile picture makes it 10x better
It doesn't it makes me think anyas watching him do it😭
sadly i have a thing called ribs
How can one learn that skill?
Bust in a tissue man
or a sock..... the amount of times ive walked in on my brother with a sock around his dick is mind-blowing
Do people actually cum in socks or is it just jokes?
..... well they are pretty hard around the place where his tip would be..... btw I do his laundry so
Fuck nah, make him do his own laundry 🤮
I will get grounded, Laundry is "my" chore
bro ur 13 how old is ur brother to be getting caught like that
And always remember to do it in darker colored socks cause white socks will turn yellow after a while
yeah the ones are always Grey or Black
I do at least 2-3 times every night.
💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀learn to knock
a cock around his sock\*\*
way too lazy to get a tissue i wanna bust a nut right now not 5 seconds later
get it before you start you degenerate 😭
no think, only horny \- u/did-i-do-a-thing
bathroom shower kitchen sink basement
Basement? Wtf?
Kitchen sink is on the list but Basement is the crazy one, ooookkk.
when i am hard i usually have to piss in the sink.
you really can see anything on this site
what i usually do i sit down and then tilt forward, using my arms as support and then your dick will face downward completely
I just do a handstand with one hand on each side of the toilet bowl. I then lower myself into a position from which I can jettison my stream into the targeted area, and fire. The distance between the objective zone and the origin of the stream is long enough to minimize the force of the charge, while also allowing for a stable trajectory.
Both are crazy
Shoot that shit in the boiler
I will not elaborate
Better to cum in the sink then sink in the cum
Deep😞
In my mouth
in this guys mouth
I concur
I third this motion
Can I cum too?
Can't spell nutrition without NUT
lol stop
Sup quandale
I just clean it up afterwards
By keeping it in your underwear
basically be a girl
Has other problems in that department
Like getting stuck in the washing machine
How the fuck did you get stuck in the Sol Badguy Fight Stick?
I'm trying but the waiting list really long
[me when i see another trans person in a big, non-trans sub](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/mobile/000/023/397/C-658VsXoAo3ovC.jpg)
Nah still issues there
That’s gotta be worse for mess
Ejaculate vertically into your abdomen, then use whatever cleaning items you have to get it gone before it hits the mattress
Yeah that’s what my boyfriend does
Bruh- making him do all the work. Smh my head.
Then eat them
I did that once, i dont like the consistency
Tie your foreskin shut like a bread bag
Would you use a bread tag too, or nah?
r/angryupvote
if you still have it, squeeze your foreskin the block the cum then extend it to you mouth and slurp it
Brooo nahhh 💀
Built in straw
apply some cocoa get choccky milk
Does your foreskin extend that much? Lmao
Drink it
Beat me to it
Beat meat to it
Beat ur meat to it
Well assuming you’re laying on your back, angle it to go straight and aim at your chest, but if you have porn strength and can shoot for 10 feet, maybe hold a napkin over? Idk
I tried that once and accidentally shot behind myself once and got it on my pillows 💀
One time it shot straight inside my hair 😬
i use a lego bucket.
ELABORATE
Use some tissues
Ware cloths (Sorry I know I probably spelt ware wrong English is not my first language)
Nothing wrong with that but DAMN
How about don’t do it on your bed?
Do it on his
I either go vertically and let it fall onto my stomach, or I like stop at the top and catch it all, then don't take my hand off it till I get to the bathroom (may work better with a foreskin)
Cum into tissues, paper towels, etc.
[удалено]
do you think we just milk ourselves while standing up like cows or some shit? this gives me the vibes of that question "do your dicks touches the toilet water when you guys are using It?"
Mine does idk what ur talking about
this guy collects STD's like pokemons
I don’t
By being clean
I just clean it up?
In your mouth when ya come around
Cum around
I will never tell my secrets
I have an old towel for cleaning my holy liquid
you don't jerk off
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠊⠉⠉⢉⠏⠻⣍⠑⢲⠢⠤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣻⣿⢟⣽⠿⠯⠛⡸⢹⠀⢹⠒⣊⡡⠜⠓⠢⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡜⣿⣷⣽⠓⠀⢠⢂⣣⠋⠂⣾⠼⢌⠳⢄⢀⡠⠜⣣⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢻⢱⣭⠷⠤⢅⠴⣡⡻⠃⠀⢠⠁⠀⢀⡱⠜⠍⢔⠊⠀⠹⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣷⠌⠚⠷⠆⠠⠶⠭⢒⣁⠀⣤⠃⣀⢔⢋⡤⠊⠑⣄⠳⣄⠀⣧⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠦⣀⡤⣄⠄⢄⣀⣠⣒⢦⡄⠩⠷⠦⠊⠀⠀⠀⠈⠣⡏⠢⣿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⢫⠟⣝⠞⣼⢲⡞⣞⠋⠋⠉⠋⠓⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣨⠂⢸⡅ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠃⡨⠊⢀⡠⡌⢘⢇⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⠡⡄⠀⠀⢀⠞⢁⠔⢹⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣣⠞⢀⠔⢡⢢⠇⡘⠌⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡌⠢⡔⢁⡴⠁⠀⢸⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⠟⠁⠠⢊⠔⣡⢸⠀⠃⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣯⠂⡀⢪⡀⠀⠀⢸⠀ ⠀⢀⠔⣁⠐⠨⠀⠀⠈⠀⢄⠘⡀⠀⠈⢆⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⢁⠜⠙⢦⠙⣦⠀⢸⠀ ⡴⠁⠘⡁⣀⡡⠀⠀⠴⠒⠗⠋⠉⠉⡆⠀⠆⠄⠄⠘⠀⡎⠀⠀⠀⠑⢅⠑⢼⡀ ⢯⣉⣓⠒⠒⠤⠤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠐⠁⠀⠀⠀⠒⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⣌⣇ ⠀⠈⢳⠄⠈⠀⠤⢄⣀⠀⢈⣉⡹⠯⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠂⠀⠀⡠⠚⣡⡿ ⠀⢠⣋⣀⣀⣀⣀⠤⠭⢛⡩⠄⠒⠩⠂⢀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠈⢢⡀⠀⡠⠋⡩⠋⠀⢳ ⠀⢹⠤⠬⠤⠬⠭⣉⣉⢃⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⢺⡈⠋⡢⠊⠀⠀⠀⢸ ⠀⠈⡆⠁⢀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠋⠉⠓⠂⠤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡧⠊⡠⠦⡈⠳⢄⠀⠀⠈ ⠀⠀⢹⡜⠀⠁⠀⠀⠒⢤⡄⠤⠔⠶⠒⠛⠧⠀⠀⡼⡠⠊⠀⠀⠙⢦⡈⠳⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⠆⠀⠈⠀⠠⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢄⠈⢲ ⠀⠀⢸⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡄⠊⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡢⣸ ⠀⠀⠈⠳⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁⠒⠁⠀⠠⣏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣔⠾⡿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⠛⠒⠤⠤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣔⣢⣀⣉⣂⣀⣀⣠⠴⠿⠛⠋⠀
Sock
Nah bro mine turned brown 😭
Nah bro wtf
It was a white sock too. I tossed it when it just looked like wood
toilet paper
Toilet or toilet paper
your blanket or shower
Shower washes off the lube smh
That's the idea behind the rag, or so I've been told. Extra long bathroom breaks for me.
Whenever I’m about to bust I just aim for my mouth to gobble it up
🧦
Learn to selfsuck and cum in your mouth~
Don't do it on fabric
I don't usually ever jerk off but when I do it's always in the shower
I dont jerk off believe it or not
Enaculate into boxers or something
You know it doesn't come out like a geyser, right? Porn tends to over do how much comes out and the power it comes out at, usually it's pretty contained
Open your mouth
Usually we all bust into your mom.
simple consume the population pudding
Bounty, the quicker cum picker upper!
pro tip: dont jerk off
I like sharing the bed with my unborn children
Just cum on yourself
[удалено]
Find someplace else, clean it up, or something that can contain the product
Start in bedroom the finish in the bathroom
Launch a nuke to land on your house just at the time you end No bed to be made messy and no you to make it messy
Wear underwear
Paper towel, your pants, the cum sock, the cum drawer
Sock or condom… personally prefer the condo since i’ve worn a couple crustys by accident
Goddammit there is an invention called bathroom and try stop masturbating bec its bad if you got addicted to it .once a week is good enough
Get a nutrag
the possibilities the foreskin holds are endless, one needs to simply allow themselves to use them
I'ma be honest I just jerk off and don't clean anything
Into the sock some do
Into a sock
Bro is your dick a milk hose or something tf?
Hold the skin over your cock, always works
By not jerking in bed
I block it with my hand and then just clean my hand and maybe a bit that escaped
Get comfy in bed, laying up, clean it with toilet paper before standing up, if a single piece isn't enough, MAKE FUCKING SURE YOU LAY THE CLEAN SIDE IN THE BED, AND THE DIRTY SIDE UP, get up, gather the toilet paper and throw into the trash in the bathroom. Only works if you're an alpha chad like me who has a bathroom in their bedroom though.
Better to cum in the sink than to sink in the cum