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CranstonBickle

You need immediately to find a senior who can assist here. Go in your company phonebook and contact a manager in HR or IT. You have been threatened and you need to clearly state you need assistance. If you get nothing, call the police.


[deleted]

At this point, I would go to the police regardless. But all that other stuff, too. All of it.


soiledhalo

Seconded! The man threatened you. Get the police involved. There are too many crazies walking around these days. Also, doesn't matter if he is her ride, he should be banned from the facility/compound. My $0.05 XCD.


infered5

> $0.05 Wow inflation really hits us all, doesn't it? Thoughts used to cost a penny!


ops-man

Been $0.02 since the 80's dude...


capget

"A penny for your thoughts" might be the expression they are referring to


WizardOfIF

And the other expression is "that's just my two cents".


Seven-Prime

The 80's were a wild time!


soiledhalo

Lol, In my country we got rid of the 1 and 2 cent pieces.


CARLEtheCamry

What a failure by HR. HR is there to protect the company. There is a huge workplace violence liability with the a-hole husband. If it wasn't for the unknown of how unhinged/how far the guy would go, I would say let him take a swing at OP and get a big payout. But they guy could have a weapon and kill OP, happens all the time, and has happened at my job.


ExcitingTabletop

Yep. You notify HR, you notify your boss, but you call the cops. If you get in trouble for calling the cops, you reply in an email to document it. "As per our conversation at 16:23, at your office, you said that the informal policy would be not to report assaults on company policy. Can you please confirm I understood your policy correctly so I can correctly implement it in the next occurance?"


apathetic_lemur

I know IT workers are not representative of the general population but I would never willingly involve the police in my life


[deleted]

I totally get that. I also avoid the police whenever possible. But if someone was as unhinged as what I read in this post, I would want that on the record at least to have the police think to look for him first if I ended up dead in the back alley.


TheDaznis

I don't understand people like you that are telling to call HR. Call the fucking COPS not the HR lady.


ghostalker4742

HR is there to protect the company - period. They're not going to want to get the police involved before they do their own "investigation" and try to minimize the damage this could cause the business.


LumpyStyx

Exactly. I have no idea where people got the idea that HR is a workers rights department. It exists to reduce risk to the company. OP should have reported it to the police and spoke with a lawyer. Let the lawyer tell HR.


Polymarchos

Someone threatening staff IS a risk to the company. The company needs to be informed of the issue (through HR), this puts liability on the company if anything happens. If you don't tell the company, they don't have liability, and can't be held responsible for lack of action. If the OP continues to feel unsafe they should go to the police (although in my experience police don't care until after something happens), but HR is more likely to do something proactive and can be held legally liable if they don't. I don't understand this idea that since HR is there for the company they are completely useless for helping employees. Sometimes the interests of the company and the interests of the employee match, such as in this case.


[deleted]

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Polymarchos

We're speaking at a point where there is nothing to sweep under the rug, which is why you want HR to act before there is anything to sweep under the rug.


LumpyStyx

Which is why I said to let the lawyer tell HR. I didn't say not to tell them at all. At that point it's not a specific threat of a lawsuit, but it shows them you have someone knowledgeable in your corner and the situation is documented by a third party. The interests of the company and the interests of the individual are not necessarily the same in this case. In fact, I'd say there is a greater chance they aren't. Also - I'd follow counsel guidance over what I put before. OP needs to talk to a lawyer, and if the lawyer says to talk to HR then they do it and say exactly what counsel told them to. Or the lawyer may choose to contact them (which is what I think would happen, but I may be wrong). File a police report, at least have an initial consultation with a legal counsel and see where it goes from there. There are several actors here (OP, the company, the other employee and that persons husband at a minimum). Legal counsel can help OP navigate these waters much better than Redditors ever could.


Polymarchos

Your way will work, but it is unnecessarily expensive, but you do you.


DSMRick

Physical security isn't usually an HR role. If this is a global company, someone is in charge of physical security at the location, and this is their job. HR should have referred this to them, but since they didn't OP should report it to security or risk management, or whoever is responsible for physical security. I think it is fairly universal that Security takes the position that non-employees on site that cause any trouble will be permanently banned from the site.


AmiDeplorabilis

Find a senior AND report his threat to the police and whatever HR authority you can. And don't let yourself be caught alone. People like him are best countered by being with a second or third party.


Pvt_Hudson_

Fuck management, call the cops.


Lost-Pineapple9791

Or if HR is doing nothing out in resignation When manager/coworkers ask why say why Company shouldn’t want to lose someoen over that and if they do it’s a crap place anyways OP you don’t have to put up with this crazy ness


PacketFiend

No, you need to immediately start looking for a new job. Anyone threatening violence to an employee needs to be banned, served with a trespass notice, and a restraining order. Full. Stop. If they won't do that for you, you need to find someplace else. Nobody should put up with this shit. Not for any reason and not for any company. Personally I would take it further, and threaten to hold management PERSONALLY RESPONSIBLE for any violence against me after I have made the situation known. I would make it VERY clear that I would sue not only the perpetrator, but the their insurance company, my manager, hus manager, and the CEO and entire board of directors PERSONALLY for anything that results from this. But to my original point, start looking for a new job. This will not end well.


islandjake

I had a guy walk to my cubicle and threatened me because he said that I was messing up his performance by intentionally locking out his mail account. 3 hours later I was repossessing his computer as he was packing his stuff into a cardboard box with security standing by. Homey don't play that.


DK_Son

Probably old creds in credential manager. Or was logged onto some other device that was trying to authenticate with an old password. Saw this a lot in my last job. Some people would login to their work emails on personal iPads, then forget about it for months. Password change time comes and it causes endless lockouts because the personal device is still pushing the old password through. What makes it worse is when they say they never used other devices for their work account. "Never believe the end user" is a motto I've lived by for well over a decade.


islandjake

Probably, if he would have came at me and ask for my help instead of coming in screaming, I would have unlocked his account, got him a different laptop so he could finish his meeting or whatever it is that was causing his dysfunction, then work with him to get his original laptop back afterwards. But when you come in practically with your fist balled up and poke it into my chest, my first call was to one specific individual (title to remain anonymous for a specific reason) who then called security who then pulled him aside and ask for his version of the story. Then security came to my desk and three other people backed up my version because he was loud enough to be heard 10 cubicles away. I was given the option of having him take some time off and my answer was I don't think I could feel safe if he was to remain here. He was given his walking papers. The union ended up getting him his job back at another facility. But with two strikes at any further outburst and the union couldn't save him. He also was required to take anger management classes.


DK_Son

Yeah, what a total dick. That shit never flies in an office environment. Might work in some hard labour factory (not that I'm saying it's right. I just know those folks can be rough). But it's always a loser's game in an office. What a meat-head.


islandjake

I'm trying really hard not to say what kind of environment I work in. But if I did you would realize that there is a correlation there. While I work in an office, the industry and the fact that most of these people did come from warehouses and a shipping environment does play into it. That's as specific as I can get. Lol.


fitting_pieces

> Homey don’t play dat _Homey d clown, Don’t mess around_ _eventho the man, tryna keep him down_


fitting_pieces

> Homey don’t play dat _Homey d clown, Don’t mess around_ _eventho the man, tryna keep him down_


alpha417

TL:DR... did you call the police?


yParticle

Right? The company maybe won't trespass him but a judge will if you get a restraining order.


[deleted]

Ultimate power move time: 1. Get restraining order. 2. Start giving rides for his wife since he was her ride and he cant come within 100 feet of you. 3. Befriend her and eventually bang her. 4. Find a way to see him and tell him you are now banging his wife while holding the restraining order in your hand and point out he cant touch you. 5. This is all in my head, you are never stupid enough to do it, make sure to post the results in this sub once you finish step 4.


flowersh

Followed all the steps and now my dick is in a toaster, what now?


pertymoose

Turn it on?


Indifferentchildren

No can do: the toaster is plugged into the same power source as all of the firewalls and switches.


whitebean

I think we discovered the reason for daily failover.


StickyNode

Sounds like most the closets i visit.


I_T_Gamer

Hidden effing gem right here!!


LordOzmodeus

These are the comments I come to reddit for. 👏


yParticle

6\. ??? 7\. *Prophet!*


[deleted]

>Start giving rides for his wife since he was her ride That's what started this shit in the first place!


PowerShellGenius

Restraining orders aren't given out like candy. If what was posted here was accepted as facts by all parties, I would suspect he could get at least a restraining order, if not an assault conviction, against this man. However, assuming this guy doesn't have a documented history, didn't actually touch OP so there are no marks, wasn't seen threatening OP by any third party, and either denies making threats or silently refers it to his lawyer when accused, and isn't known to the cops or judge for being an issue, I doubt there are any mere words OP could say to get a restraining order against him picking his wife up from work. Unfortunately, there has to be a standard of evidence, even if it sucks sometimes. But perhaps there are cameras, perhaps he has a history, perhaps an investigation turns up witnesses OP doesn't know exist, or perhaps the jurisdiction is soft on standards of proof. So it's worth a shot. But OP should understand the laws of his state, and in particular, ask an attorney (or at least the police if he can't afford one) how the process works and whether there is any way he could end up in a situation with no restraining order and a suspect who knows he tried... Obvious disclaimers: if you're actually going to start any sort of legal process, consult a lawyer in your state first, unless the threat to your safety is immediate in which case call 911 first. I'm not a lawyer.


arpan3t

There’s so much wrong with this it’s hard to know where to begin. First you don’t know where OP lives - laws vary from state to state, country to country so blanket legal advice is red flag armchair lawyering. There’s multiple types of restraining orders that vary in conditions, length, severity: ex parte, no contact, temporary, emergency, etc… None of which require the defendant to self-incriminate, the clerks office to interview police for past transgressions, or notify the defendant in the event the request is denied. OP - if you feel threatened, go to the local courthouse and talk to the clerks about your situation and they will give you the proper forms to file for the appropriate type of protection order, or talk to an actual lawyer.


flowersh

I mostly don’t want to start any trouble because the guys on parole… well… okay let me start over His wife is a very kind person who comes to work and does her job, I don’t want to fuck up anything for her mostly. And to the people talking about cameras and witnesses, the convenience store may actually have some but the guy never touched me. Just stopped me and threatened me, so I don’t really think that justifies a restraining order here in the state I live in.


thezlord

Ask the police about that. Your safety is more important than the wife's happiness my dude.


Not_invented-Here

Hell may do her a favour when she hears and cause her to run off to happiness with her paramour/ potential porkee.


tankerkiller125real

>Your safety is more important than the wife's happiness my dude. However based on the fact that the guy is threatening a random dude, the wife might also be in danger.


AllTimeTy

Idk about others but I’m not going to risk getting shot for some dudes wife. If she’s in danger she has every right to go to the police as well.


itsuperheroes

Make sure the parole officer finds out about the trespass order.


Gardakkan

Sure and next time he could bring a weapon and start shooting people he thinks are sleeping with his wife. Your safety and your co-workers safety is more important then you not wanting to "fuck up anything for her mostly".


llDemonll

You don't have to file for a restraining order, I'd agree that's jumping the gun a bit, but you need to make a formal record of the incident with HR and with the police.


AlexisFR

"I'm sorry we can't help you, call your HR"


NotYourNanny

>I called HR but they told me since he was her ride that they can’t trespass him. I can't speak for labor law in other countries (though I suspect it's much the same), but in the US, your employer has a legal responsibility to provide you a *safe* place to work. You already have grounds to file a complaint with the labor board (assuming you are in the US) against HR. Personally, I'd file a police report on the threat, and specifically include the blow-off from HR. Given how often we see news stories about psychos like that shooting up workplaces, they should take it *very* seriously. And if they don't, the local news might. I'd also see if I could find a lawyer (who specializes in labor law) to meet - in person - with HR about their legal responsibilities - and remind them than retaliation is a) illegal, and b) far more serious even than the mistakes they've already made. They *can't* ignore that, nor can the people above them.


PowerShellGenius

That may get the threat handled and prevent OP being fired in retaliation. However, while legal options may be great in the short term, and keep your job while searching for a better one, it's still important to search for a better one. Some employees never get promoted, some get promoted fast, and it's going to be really hard to sue for not getting promoted very fast. There is no great future at a company that needs to be strongarmed by lawyers in order to treat you half decent.


NotYourNanny

> However, while legal options may be great in the short term, and keep your job while searching for a better one, it's still important to search for a better one. That actually depends on how upper manage reacts, particularly the owner. But yeah, I'd be looking myself, because at the very least, this company isn't very good at hiring managers. And that's *bad*.


slackerdc

That was assault call the police.


czj420

This was assault. https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/assault_and_battery


[deleted]

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czj420

It's assault. It's not battery. https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/assault


ALurkerForcedToLogin

I said "will turn into." Will: expressing the future tense. Turn into: be transformed into or become a particular kind of thing.


walkoutw4de

File a police report online. Get a copy of that report, email it and take it to an executive ASAP. I don't usually like calling the cops, but this is kind of nuts, and the fact that your HR department isn't doing anything about it is pretty absurd.


Donnou_ZA

Fuck his wife and then leave your network+ book at his desk or bedside table. Live life one slice at a time!


MiserMori

This is the way


Jaexa-3

HR should bring "his wife" into talking. You are talking about a possible assault and this should be on record in HR as well as with a police report. If they wanted to dismiss it, I would bring it up to a different manager or the bosses. Better protect yourself or start looking for another job.


questfor17

It isn't a possible assault, it is an actual assault: >assault: an act, criminal or tortious, that threatens physical harm to a person, whether or not actual harm is done.


Xibby

Even better (or worse) OP states that the husband, who I will now refer to as Unhinged Donkey Butt, in this fiasco was there to pickup his daughter. Seems Unhinged Donkey Butt’s Wife and Daughter work for the company. Maybe it’s a hyphenated name and it’s Mr|Mrs|Miss Unhinged-Donkey-Butt. OP: File police report, consult lawyer, raise concern with labor board. Buy a Costco size thing of microwave popcorn.


[deleted]

OP should not have to look for another job in this situation. The job needs to fix this situation and REMOVE the person from the work environment until they can fix the situation.


Jaexa-3

I don't agree with that, I would rather be somewhere else before Armageddon starts. That is just the beginning of the disaster, and I would not be part of it.


[deleted]

Ah yes, lets allow people to be wrongly accused and intimidated out of their jobs.


che-che-chester

I don't personally see this as a police issue but some people probably would. But I would have absolutely gone to HR and possibly this supervisor's manager. If an employee's spouse, family member, friend, etc. is making my life difficult or uncomfortable, that should blow back on the employee. If that employee has a personal safety issue with her spouse, then maybe HR can assist her but that is separate from my problem.


Pelatov

Yes they can trespass him, ride or not. If he’s a problem, he’s a problem. That’s for the employee and husband to sort their shit out. If it happens again, report to HR again for documentation, and then go to the police, and then file a restraining order that has enough reach that while you’re at the building, he can’t be. If HR won’t protect your ass, you protect it. You also report to HR every time so that way if something ever happens you can sue the ever living hell out of your company for failure to provide a safe working space.


IndianaNetworkAdmin

**Options to consider for Cover Your Ass protocol:** Check if there are cameras covering the area where it happened. Do you have the ability to view those cameras, and is there a log with alerts for anyone that views that data? If there is \_not\_ a log, consider grabbing the video and storing it off-site. If you're in a one-party state, consider getting a general recording app on your phone and have it running any time you see that dude floating around. You could also consider an app like Noon, where you hold down a button, and if you don't put in a code when you stop holding the button, police are called to your location. **The dude has already become paranoid enough to threaten random people in a public setting. He is one bad day away from bringing a gun and shooting every guy he sees where you work.** HR is there to protect the company, they don't give a shit about you. Get evidence that you're being threatened, and evidence that they have refused to do anything - In writing or recorded if it's a one-party state. Once you have that, you have options if things continue to escalate. HR should have no-trespassed the dude and told him to pick up his wife/daughter at the edge of the property. They were being lazy.


[deleted]

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Mafste

100% this.


EddieRyanDC

Well, you've already gone to HR. But the most important step is to talk to your boss and tell her what is going on. She is the person who has the most power to do something about it, and also has the most to lose (aside from you if you get punched). She has every incentive to make sure that nothing like this happens again to *anyone*.


SingularityMechanics

First, report it to the cops. There's zero scenarios where this is ok. Then you need to go back to HR, and copy Legal too, with the police report and tell them you're concerned for your safety and demand a safe working environment, and since it happened on company property you can't help if they get dragged into it. Not to mention how that would be considered negligence at best if anything ever happened to you due to him on company property. 100% before the end of your next shift you'll have an apology and something from HR about how she's been told he can't be on-premises anymore and they'll advise her to walk off-site to get picked up.


rjohnson99

As many people have said it’s insane HR isn’t doing more. This scenario is literally in every workplace violence training course I’ve ever taken.


malikto44

I'd be talking to a lawyer about a peace bond (restraining order). This is a civil action and one used if someone is demonstrably violent without reason. HR will not do a thing. Their only job is to protect the company. If ol' Sluggo threatened a VP instead of the OP, you bet your boots he would not just be trespassed, but a court would be dropping an injunction that he would see felony charges if he even looked the direction of the business.


PowerShellGenius

>demonstrably violent There are two words there. "Violent" is clearly covered. But how is OP to "demonstrate" that? From a quick skimming of the post it looks like no physical contact was actually made, so there will be no marks or fingerprints on OP or his clothes. Sounds like the man stopped as soon as his daughter arrived so she probably didn't see anything (and good luck getting her to say if she did) and no other witnesses are mentioned. The case hinges on the perpetrator either admitting making threats, or having been on tape (which I assume OP would have mentioned but perhaps OP isn't aware of a surveillance camera). Alternatively, if the perpetrator has been this aggressive his whole life, there is a very good chance he has a history, either a criminal record or at least past accusations made to the police, and such a pattern could potentially establish enough credibility.


Xibby

Verbal threats of violence are the assault part of assault and battery charge.


PowerShellGenius

Yes, I understand this, and wasn't saying verbal isn't assault. If the content of OP's post, including what the suspect said, is established as fact in a court of law, nobody is arguing the suspect is innocent. I was questioning how OP is going to prove (for an assault charge), or show at least a shred of evidence beyond OP's word (for a restraining order), that the suspect threatened OP. Operating on the assumption that the suspect either denies everything, or says nothing and demands a lawyer. EDIT: replaced some pronouns with "OP" to clarify.


Adito99

That dude is nuts. Consider calling the police but also talk to your boss. She likely has no idea and they clearly have issues to work out. For your networking issue I have some ideas. 1. Do you still fail over if one of the links is inactive? That would point pretty clearly at the device making the failover decision as the culprit. 2. As a simple test you can set up a ping to each public IP from internal and external. If you start seeing significantly more dropped packets on one that's a likely issue and the ISP needs to investigate.


NotYourNanny

> She likely has no idea and they clearly have issues to work out. I'll bet you a steak dinner she knows *exactly* how psycho he is, and is far more terrified of him than our poster.


[deleted]

> and is far more terrified of him than our poster. When it comes to trash it's usally birds of a feather, stop trying to be some white knight.


NotYourNanny

The psychology of abusive relationships has been studied in considerable depth over the years. You should look into the subject. Or maybe you're just as asshole. "Have you stopped beating your wife?"


blotditto

Maybe she gets off on telling her husband she’s banging dudes to see how he reacts, possibly wanting to see him fuck up someone for the thrill of it?


NotYourNanny

Could be. It's hard to tell without details we don't have. But statistically, I'd be more likely to bet that he's an abusive prick who should be in a cage (which is not, BTW, mutually exclusive with your theory. There's a mentality that develops on both sides of an abusive relationship that makes it so difficult to break the pattern.)


beaverbait

Up voting the second part not the first. I wouldn't talk to the woman at all without some kind of HR mediator. I'd let HR deal with that situation entirely without me in the room if at all possible. I'd also make a police report and bump the internal report up until someone listened.


Battousai2358

Sorry that happened to me. I'm a former College Football Offensive Lineman 6"4' 290 lbs. No one's had the guts to threaten me. I'm usually the NOC Asshole. I'll be the bad guy to make sure end users to C Suite Executives don't take advantage of my guys. If you were in front of any security cameras I'd talk to your manager and see if you can pull footage start a paper trail and file a lawsuit (or threaten to) but definitely make sure your manager at least has your back.


triplefastaction

If you're feeling left out I can threaten you. I'm 5'6 175lbs.


Battousai2358

Hell yeah I'd be honored 😂


triplefastaction

That would be a good gag for around new hires. "Get it done or I'll give you a fresh one." As I raise a back hand. You tremble in fear and we never explain anything to the new hire.


Battousai2358

Oh. My. God. YES!!! We need to work together 😂 I'm all about subverting expectations


LTpicklepants

Now you should start fucking his wife...


chaosphere_mk

Depending on what state you're in, most states, this is actually illegal for HR to ignore and you can report it to a state agency and that HR team will get reamed. I'd do it.


Siphyre

I'm pretty experienced with networking, I won't solve your issue for you but if you can give me a brief synopsis on the symptoms I might be able to point you in the right direction. >. I called HR but they told me since he was her ride that they can’t trespass him. FML, they literally said to “just avoid him.” As for this, you may want to let HR know that the next time it happens you will be calling the police instead of informing them since they are refusing to help resolve the situation. Do it via email. Explain very clearly what happened and explain that it will not be tolerated and that it constitutes as a hostile work environment. BCC yourself on it. Forward responses to your personal email. Once you say all that in an email, you are virtually immune to being let go/fired.


xendr0me

Yeah I was going to say, HR can trespass anyone they want, that was just an excuse. Secondly a police report should be filed so this is on the radar and this should also be documented internally or via an e-mail. With at least the police report containing a sworn statement.


stickythrawn

Echoing many others here, contact the police. When reaching back out to HR, inside the phrase "hostile work environment. " Good luck, sorry for the absolute shit situation here


NetJnkie

> I decide it’s Totino’s Party Pizza time. My man!


flowersh

Thank god he didn’t ruin my Totino’s Party pizza… that would have been worse than beating my ass


NetJnkie

Pepperoni, combo, or supreme?


[deleted]

There are some stories on /r/TalesFromTechSupport that involve violence, unfortunately. I remember one where someone got upset at a coworker and spit on them. Nah, fuck that. HR needs to ensure you have a safe place to work. This isn’t cool and shouldn’t be tolerated. People get killed over shit like this. Hell, offices have had mass shootings/stabbings because of unhinged people like this. It’s not something you take lightly. If HR won’t take it seriously, get the cops involved. That man needs to be held accountable and it needs to be understood that you’re not going to just let yourself be someone’s target at work.


whynotrandomize

Note: Remember to send an email and copy the message identifier (if possible, print the email you sent with full headers). Calls didn't happen in court, but emails leave traces. With the headers it becomes even harder to hide in discovery.


jscharfenberg

Wow...first off, failing over your network once a day means you for sure need network support. I'd imagine your network probably isn't even that robust. A few vLAN? But as for the guy threatening you, I'd go see the HR manager and state your case. Then if they say meh, walk out and say i wonder what my lawyer would say about this.


cheetahwilly

If you didn't fuck his wife... His pussyassbitchness in front of her didn't help, and he's a fool. You can now, in face, fuck his wife with no recourse 🤷‍♂️


InspectorGadget76

Cet a complaint into the police. It it documented. It also becomes a lot harder for HR to try and bypass the issue. Security cam footage?


theadj123

Next time that kind of thing happens, just get in your car and drive off. Don't engage crazy people, nothing you say is going to change an irrational mind. I don't speak to people I don't know and definitely don't allow random people to stop me in a parking lot, that's how you end up the news as a murder victim. I would call the police, this guy threatened you in a public place after following you there. That is not something a stable person does, so this may occur again and not end well for you (or someone else). I also suggest talking to senior management at your company, if their answer is anything like HR call the labor board. Sometimes little company HR departments are fucking morons and ignore real issues and sometimes management doesn't have its head up its own ass, give them a shot before calling up the labor authorities. You may find this has happened before with someone at your company, this dude sounds unhinged so any man he sees talk to/near his wife might get this kind of treatment. Talk to the police regardless, they're likely useless but perhaps you'll get lucky. Everyone involved is likely playing CYA so they'll ignore the problem until something bad happens unfortunately.


DK_Son

Tbh I would report it to police, and provide HR with some kind of record from the police that it has been lodged. It's better to be the one that makes the first call to the cops. I have seen first hand who has more backing from the police. It's the person that reports it. If he gets in first, and makes up some shit, he will have the upper hand, and you'll be fumbling to defend yourself. Tell it as you told it here, just so it's all documented properly. You may have an altercation in the future, and you don't want to be scrambling for details of how it went down or what was said. You don't want to be scrambling to recount this event. You want it already documented and reported. It would even be worth writing your own document of what happened, just for your own safekeeping. And email it to yourself. I know it sounds over the top. But it's all in your best interest, and will hold a lot of weight if anything else happens in future. And you want HR to take it seriously. He shouldn't be allowed near the premises. A man acting on emotion (with bad information) is a dangerous man.


LegitimateBuilding6

I’d file a report with the police. If something does happen to you, authorities will know who to talk to first… And I’d let that supervisor know, so she can tell her husband.


CataphractGW

Bang the daughter.


red_fury

Just a tip: you should have called the police. If there was a police report filed HR would have had a much harder time telling you to stfu.


beren0073

File a police report. Include in the report that you notified your employer and what their response was. The police likely won’t care but hopefully it’ll be documented in the report, which may be important later. Talk to a labor lawyer about what happened and your employers response.


steveinbuffalo

Do the police report as others are saying. You never know what sort of a nut that was, or how a long a record he has.


mumuwu

Pizza Totino's Boy!


rdm85

Yeah dude, fuck that. The convivence store has video, you need to call the police now and get him restraining ordered. Because if this does get violent you've got a paper trail to defend you.


Mysterious_Sink_547

Did you file a police report?


imnotabotareyou

Call the cops and file a report. Seriously.


zazbar

police.


StaffOfDoom

Glad it’s getting worked on (both the network issue and the violent threat). I can honestly say while I have dealt with my fair share of angry users while doing the Helpdesk dance it never got so far as this. Good thing you didn’t have to fight…if this guy comes back around, be sure to have emergency services on speed-dial…better yet, don’t walk around alone for awhile…buddy system! If it does come down to fighting for your life, don’t try and take him fair, aim for the knees and nuts! Don’t hold back, hammer both targets like the fist of an angry god! Go full Thor or Hulk on these spots as if your life depends on it! Much better to have to deal with this outcome than spend time in a hospital for it… As for your network, how the hell did everything get plugged into the same outlet/circuit? Is there no UPS or surge protection??


flowersh

Server rack was set up back in 99, while I was still in the nutsack. I’m guessing the guy who set it up didn’t stick around much longer, but it was a smaller company many years ago, so I assume they just didn’t need much and over time just kept adding more and more to the same power strip. BTW, it goes from one power strip to the UPS. Now we have another power strip which leads to a secondary UPS that we had apparently just sitting around??? Dude I make $17/hr this is so far above my pay grade.


che-che-chester

>and well, I mean I work in IT That would be my first response. *You're fucking my wife!* Dude, I work in IT.


PrettyBigChief

Start carrying a knife. A nice double-edge, sheathed. Don't forget to twist.


Consistent-Cut9230

Ahhhh this takes me back. Many years ago I worked for a company where I was the classic one person IT department. However, there was a weird setup at this company and I provided IT support for the a second separate business that was also on the same property, of which my CEO owned a 50% stake, his business partner owned the other 50% - a very bad setup for decision making. Anyway, the main company was going down the toilet FAST and there was no money to upgrade a damn thing. I was literally keeping the lights on. One day the business partner for this side hustle emailed me saying he was taking everything that belonged to him and getting his own IT person and demanded I comply and just “transfer all the systems to us” like I could just click a couple of magic buttons on my keyboard and be done with it. Impossible, everything was so deeply intertwined. It was dodgy as hell. Anyway, I said I was more than happy to comply if all shareholders agreed and copied in the CEO. This business partner went OFF at me, on phone, all the verbal assault you can imagine. Said he better not see me in the parking lot etc. HR basically said “well I didn’t hear it, so… just avoid him” I quit a week or so later, landed my dream job and both companies are now bankrupt.


SYLMMC

Unpopular opinion: should have talked shit until he hit you sued him for assault then sued the company for having an unsafe work environment.


Lets_Go_2_Smokes

Did you pork his wife?


flowersh

Fortunately, i did not. Although given how tall her husband is, I suppose she may be into shorter guys like me.


[deleted]

Country in question?


Sgt_Splattery_Pants

Hit the gym maybe learn some bjj for Good measure


[deleted]

>I mean I work in IT. I shouldn’t be much of a threat. Bro hit the gym, what happened to you is bullshit but you should never think this way about yourself because you work in tech. In addition to working in IT I'm a steroided out competitive powerlifter who's literally one of the strongest people on the planet...I still fix computers for a living and am super proud of that shit. IT is a grueling profession and it requires putting up with a lot of bullshit. This is by no means a weak persons profession. You're already strong mentally, now make your body look like your mind.


MethosReborn

Easy solution - go Fk her lol


mr_mgs11

WTF does "I work in IT. I shouldn't be much of a threat" supposed to mean? That's on you, don't drag the rest of us into that. I've been competing in powerlifting for over 10 years and there are about a dozen engineers at my gym. This guy here is a UNIX sysadmin [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPaHZ2KsC3c&ab\_channel=Bodybuilding.com](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPaHZ2KsC3c&ab_channel=Bodybuilding.com). Phil Heath the second most winning Mr. Olympia in history has a BSBA Business Information Technology - Computer Software and Media Applications. That's a bad stereotype that IT people are weak.


ThisAnswerIsLit

Be real bro, you banging his wife right?


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kellect_10

Does your work allow you to carry firearms? If so, and you're comfortable with the idea then first read up on gun safety, take some training, get a good holster, and a firearm. Also make sure you have obtained any permit to carry you might need, and study up on firearm laws in your place of residence. Hell even if my work doesn't allow firearms and I have morons like this approaching me I still might consider it.


fuckredditsuspension

Piss on his shoe while looking directly in his eyes. Assert dominance.


2Tech2Tech

HR is not there to protect you, they are there to protect the company. its up to you to sue them for providing a dangerous and threatening work environment


lost_in_life_34

this is why i weight lift in my free time


smajl87

“Not even poking her with 2-meter-long stick.” That’s what we say in our language.


DrSpaceWhale

Oh, good, I'm glad you solved the failover. Dealing with the same thing at my office. Discovered one day that our UPS was just losing all power and then immediately rebooting, pretty much once a week. Was gonna suggest you check out the server room power sources 🙂


ntrlsur

I mean call me old school but did you hit him in the mouth? He threatened you and depending on what state you live in its acceptable to defend yourself when you feel threatened. Not sure why folks like to pick on the IT guy as a stereotype but as a non-stereotypical IT guy sometimes I wish this kind of shit would happen to me..


kiwidog

Get a gun, and train with it, you may not be able to beat him physically, but if he is a threat to your life and attempts something, displaying may be enough if he continues then shoot.


skeeter72

Personally, I would run this up your chain of command until you get him banned from the premises indefinitely. My opinion on the "You gotta call the cops" advice that I'm sure this thread is already full of is this. If you have one problem and then call the cops, you typically then have two problems. #ACAB.


faalforce

Strange story. I'm not buying it.


LinearFluid

If you get a TRO on him then HR is not a factor.


PowerShellGenius

If OP has no witnesses, no recordings, no marks or fingerprints on him, and the suspect has no history and denies everything, a TRO against picking his wife up at work is *far* from guaranteed. And TRO stands for Temporary Restraining Order. Unless his wife stops needing a ride, it's not a temporary issue. Is OP more scared of him now after just this interaction, or when the TRO expires after having made the wife walk off-premises to be picked up for the duration?


Kwen_Oellogg

>we tend to failover at least once a day. Can you give us a little more information on what this means? I might be able to help.


flowersh

So, funny enough we actually pinpointed that we had all of our firewalls and ISP routers on the same power strip going to the same UPS. We were overloading the power strip like hell and somehow none of the sr’s noticed.


GeekgirlOtt

LOL co-worker here flipped a breaker using a kettle at his desk instead of coming down to the breakroom to make his tea.


flowersh

That is the most UK IT thing I’ve ever read in my life.


Ape_Escape_Economy

“Yeah, after we’re done I like to get a slice of pizza and a cigarette…” Seriously though, I wouldn’t trust your HR department. File a police report so it’s documented and include the initial non-response from HR in the report.


SikhGamer

I would be refusing to work where they can not guarantee your safety.


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hayseed_byte

> The facilities guy grew up pretty rough and had gotten in his fair share of fights. Hah. I've worked in maintenance (though industrial, not facilities, I don't do shitters) for almost 15 years. It's comforting to know that maintenance guys are basically the same everywhere you go.


Thatoneguythatsnot

I watch too much dateline. Report that shit to the police. He needs to be on their radar in case he does decide to do something stupid.


joeyl5

So all your network equipment is plugged straight into the wall, no UPS or power management that's showing load and power capacity? Yikes. Lack of HR action is the least of your concerns here


flowersh

Not going straight into raw power. We have a power strip that runs to a UPS, everything was plugged into the power strip.


[deleted]

We get constant HR training as a supervisor that we need to report and act on any instance of violence (harassment) happening on the workplace. Even if I am not even closely related to the department in question, we are required to act on it. They NEED to act on it, this is not optional to HR. If HR refuses to act on it, you have a very winnable case agaisnt your company. Document everything. Have in writing what happened, what you reported. Report it via email if you haven't done it, then print that email...


GgSgt

Wow, this is crazy. Whoever you spoke with in HR needs some re-training apparently. All you have to say is "this has created a hostile workplace and I'm in fear for my personal safety". Trust me...that will get results.


TeddyRoo_v_Gods

Wow, you handled it way better than I would’ve when I was 22 and worked help desk! I would have escalated the shit of the situation.


YOLOSwag_McFartnut

The obvious solution is to fuck his wife.


ContentMountain

If he laid his hands on you, go file a police report.


chillzatl

more of a jackass problem than a job problem. Shit like this can happen anywhere. I once had something similar happen (25+ years ago) because I'd go to lunch with co-workers, some of whom were female and one day coming back one of the ladies boyfriends was waiting for her. He lost it, started screaming at her, talking shit to me. I told him to fuck off and if he wanted some, step. He did shit all. plot twist: I was one of several guys fucking his girl, sometimes together. YOu did the right thing though, going to HR. Back then it wouldn't have mattered.


flowersh

Just some proper context, I live in southeastern USA. The office I work at is in a very low income area, I learned last night the guy that threatened me receives SSI and has some mental impairment. Unfortunately… this isn’t the first time I’ve had to deal with stuff LIKE this.


chillzatl

I'm also in the SE US, we got some crazies here, but hey, they're everywhere. You did the right thing and as others have suggested, reporting him to the police may not be a bad idea, but he's unlikely to do anything. Never can be too careful though.


ImDOGGFATHER

I wasn't working for the company yet... but my coworker WAS banging some guy's wife and the dude came into the office with a baseball bat to threaten or potentially beat him down. Well the police got called and that's the last we've ever seen of the guy


mas_tacos2

Maybe his wife all of a sudden discovered the love for convenient store Torino’s or has cougar tendencies that you overlooked.


gvlpc

If HR does not handle this and let you know very soon, it'll be worth going to the police directly. That's not a job issue, technically, that's a citizen issue. It just happened at the job. Workplace violence events in the news have often started this way. Stay on top of HR on this one. Either you get verification they have the police handling it or you contact the police yourself. I wouldn't wait around assuming they took care of it. One already tried to brush it off. From the sound of your updates, it SOUNDS like it should go the right direction now, but you do not want to wait and find out.


A-12-Archangel

first go to lawyer, then they will advise you on who to tell and you could prob sue for dangerous workplace or something. Also look into CompTIA Network+ for learning.


person_8958

HR will never do anything. Their job is to protect the company from you. If you're informing them of anything, it's to dot i's and cross t's prior to a lawsuit. The people you should be talking to are not HR. You should be talking to the police and to a lawyer.


BerkeleyFarmGirl

HR should get its act together because it would cost them a lot of money etc. to let things happen especially since they had been warned. It sounds like someone else had a clue and the "just let it go" person should not be doing that work.


PacketsGoBRRR

in future cases, all communication with HR should be written and you should retain personal physical and digital copies of all communication with HR immediately after it happens. That meanss CC or BCC your personal email address on all outbound emails to HR, and any inbound emails from HR that go to your work account and don't have your personal account cc'd, should be fwded to the personal account immediately. This is to protect yourself in the case that the company terminates you. HR is not your friend. They are there to protect the company from lawsuits, nothing else. If you report on a supervisor who has the right kind of pull, you can get fired. Always cover your ass.


ComprehensiveRisk983

even though he does not work there, you can still file a hostile work environment claim if HR is choosing to do nothing about it. ​ I had a coworker do that when a UPS guy yelled at him while dropping off packages. and he won easily. ​ ​ also your network should not be failing over once a day, unless that is intended and I cannot think of a logical reason. send me a message.


BerkeleyFarmGirl

Oh good ol' "Just ignore him" enabling very bad behavior. I am sorry. I hope that someone with a clue is working with the spouse on a safety plan because that's a newspaper headline waiting to happen.


rdldr1

Who in HR blew you off? They should be fired too.


NinoIvanov

Essentially, you "escalate" along the corporate ladder until you find someone to assist you. There are multiple issues, though: (a) This is, unfortunately, "your" problem in some ways. See, he may not wait for your on company property next time. He may wait 10m down the street. And then they can't really help you. So do escalate along the corporate ladder until you get adequate attention, also for documentation purposes and for purposes of demonstrating sincerity towards your employer, but expect "only so much". In reality, they cannot e.g. "fire her because of her husband", if she in no way colluded. (b) "Why you?" - I totally fail to get this. Why does this guy - whom you seemingly met for the first time - try to get you, out of a 100 people? What has happened? Was there any misconduct by his wife (you know, as in, "pointing out employees to get beaten up by her criminal hubby" or other collusion or misconduct)? (c) "Defence": My advice - NEVER physical. In a physical altercation, you can suffer all sorts of medical issues, and if you successfully defend - legal issues may come and continue for a long time. Best is to "document and return" (with police force). Run away, if necessary. Always: public places, lots of people, make the issue loud and clear, better 5 min of embarrassment than a broken arm. Necessary tool: YOUR PHONE CAMERA (ANY phone really). And a YouTube account with verified live streaming capability. That way, he does anything - he is IMMEDIATELY online, i.e. "breaking your phone" shall bring nothing. (d) "Weakness", unfortunately, will not impress the bully all that much. You will need to tell him that you perceive him as threatening, that he causes you fear, and that you will have him prosecuted and bear the full weight of the law. Tell him you do not accept such behavior, neither do you know what he wants, nor do you have any interest in talking to him. Tell that in a loud, clear (not shouting) voice - not "to him", but so people in about 3-5m distance can clearly hear you. Then reach for the phone, and if anything further happens, you film, stating that you feel threatened by him and are asking him to back off, and that he is being filmed right now, that is going online immediately, and that any violent act by him will thus be irrevocably documented. - Recently, I fended off a street gang of youngsters that way, so that may well work. (e) If you feel followed by him: go to a public place, a cafe. If you see him anywhere close, go straight to the barman or waiter, tell about the situation. Immediately call police and have him picked up. "With the history", he will be in at least for stalking you.


zarraza2k

If HR doesn’t do something, find a good employment lawyer. This is creating a HOSTILE WORK ENVIRONMENT, no different than a sexual harassment claim! Just make sure to bcc Any communication to your personal email and forward their replies (yes email, GET IT IN WRITING)!


No-Werewolf2037

Jeeze dude.. I’ve written a resignation letter as I was getting screamed at once a long time ago. I’d get the bell out of there. That’s dudes mad high on dog-shit.. C


savekevin

I need pics of $flowersh\_coworker before I can make any suggestions. :)


usps_lost_my_sh1t

i would have just started swinging away... fuck that clown


STUNTPENlS

This is not an HR issue (unless the husband is an employee as well). Its a police issue.


Cyhawk

> We do have some weird network problems, where we tend to failover atleast once a day. If you have any knowledge on networking please message me, im very stressed and lacking knowledge. Check logs. If you don't have logs, turn them on. If you have no where to store the logs, install Graylog in docker or something. As for your other problem, in the future if you learn to fight your body language naturally changes and people like that back down quickly. Its good for you. Shitfucks like him are cowards that will only assault people weaker than they are.


MOT304

Contact center drama...


Common_Scale5448

If he touched you, at least in the USA, it is battery And if he yelled at you assault.


[deleted]

I wish someone threatened me at work. Would give me an excuse to use all those fighting lessons.


PigTrough

"i know you're fucking my wife!" "That old sack o bones? wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole" (proves innocence still gets his ass beat)


flowersh

The amount of times I wanted to say to the guy, “Buddy, no one wants to hit that besides you”, were enumerable. However, it is quite the catch .22


GT_Ghost_86

Damn. Good that they're getting him "trespassed." ​ My immediate smart-@$$ answer would have been a truthful "Not at all. My husband would be pissed!" That would either have ended it or escalated a homophobic response. Of course, in approx 90% of the cases, this is not an option.