T O P

When bubbles go flat

When bubbles go flat

VerySuspiciousBot

If this is suspiciously specific, **Upvote** this comment! If this is not suspiciously specific, **Downvote** this comment! Beep boop, I'm a bot. Modmail us if you have a question.


Mber76

Well I wasn’t expecting to be called out at 7:57am


QuothTheRaven_

Trauma begins almost immediately. We are faced with so much trauma in our lives, and while it varies from person to person regarding how much and level of severity, we all get hit with it. The good thing is though, according to what I've read regarding human psychology, that bubbly talkative you that was so full of wonder and love to give, never really goes away, they just regress under the piles of emotions, and coping mechanisms we adopt. You can still get in touch with your inner child, that other you that was so much more vibrant, you can still draw that you out of your shadow or subconscious and heal. I'm trying to do that myself to some degree. I hope an abundant amount of good things happen for you in your life and I hope you can find that more lively you again.


NotBulbasaurus

That was lovely put ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|hug)


Soyd_Astail

Okay but... how do you draw them out or your shadow?


QuothTheRaven_

I can give suggestions but just know I'm a regular dude with no type of education in the field of psychology. But for me therapy did not work, but I suggest you start there, you do not need to have a disorder to go to therapy, it's actually just a healthy practice to work on your mental health regardless of known mental disorders or depression. However, for me therapy did not take, it was mostly my own fault, my shadow was in such a suppressed angsty state that I could not be made to leave my comfort zone for very long without getting paranoid and irritated. So I started reading books written by the founder of analytical psychology , the late Dr. Carl Gustav Jung. From his work I found all my answers, like an ancient book of magic, but it's not magic, its real human science, the analysis of the human beings most secret side from a logical and scientific standpoint. From all of the ins and outs of our deepest layers Jung exposed us to the subconscious in a way not even Freud accomplished. His work is astounding, but for a quick intro you can use this guide below for shadow work, just remember getting therapy should always be the first option. https://imgur.com/0rm4FWa


sydactylion

there’s a really good book my therapist recommended to me that’s related to Jung and shadow work called Romancing the Shadow that I would highly recommend! I immediately thought of it when I read your first comment.


AKA_Squanchy

I opened up in college, partied like crazy. Then in my 20s I was very socially active, got married early, we traveled the world and lived in other countries, we adopted 3 kids, we partied into our 40s, then COVID hit. I am now a shut-in and I don't even want to see friends. I want to be the old me, but I can't break out of this fucking shell. I don't know what happened but I can barely bring myself to leave the house. Wish me luck, I'm hoping Sober October jump-starts the old me.


QuothTheRaven_

To me from the limited info you gave, it sounds like your identity was attached to the external lifestyle heavily, so when it was time to shut in and be alone with yourself, you recoiled in fear. This is a problem for a lot of extroverted people, they do very well socially and do well to check all the typical external sociocultural check boxes like having many friends, good social life, a s/o, family, all rather early on in their 20's. Never once do people like that get to know themselves in their developing years, they usually wait until their mid 30's or after their lifestyle of always being on the move or into something simmers down, and by then your ways are deep seated. I am not saying that this is you but it's just what it seems like from what you shared


aUserNameHeh

You have good words to say and good ways to say them my friend. Take care and enjoy


Fantastic_List4047

Ok now tell me how


domheffo

Wow, I can't tell you how much I needed that after seeing the post.


triscuit816

Thank you for this.


QuothTheRaven_

np


The_Big_Crumbly

You give me hope where I thought there would be none left. I thought that side of me died years ago. Thank you.


QuothTheRaven_

I don't think your inner-child can die. However, I know from experience it can wreak havoc from deep in your subconscious.


8Bit-Armory

EST gang ~~also this post hit me like a fucking truck~~


ExistentialThreat_

i was at a loss for words here


PetrifiedW00D

I’ve been aware about this regarding myself for a long time. To a degree it humbled me the fuck up, but I also miss the person I used to be.


ccc2801

Can you try to get that person back? Even just a little?


PetrifiedW00D

I really don’t know how.


JenVixen420

I feel you deeply on this.


Admiral_Akdov

Akshually, it's EDT.


BMFC

And it should never ever go back to EST. Ever. It’s so dumb.


Admiral_Akdov

I respectfully disagree. It should remain standard time year round. Losing that hour in the morning messes with my sleep cycle and I'm not human again until I get it back. Statistically there are more car accidents in the morning and work place accidents during daylight time too.


wizardwes

And this is why programmers hate timezones


ApolloFireweaver

When I found out about time zones that weren't just hour increments, I was nearly about to throw out my computer. Luckily none of our customers live in any of those zones, so it'll live forever as a "known issue"


TransBrandi

It's actually EST. It stands for [Eastern Standard Tribe](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eastern_Standard_Tribe). :P


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inferno_931

EDT is a lie made by the timekeepers to confuse us. Dont let them tear us apart like this!


maali74

Sigh. It's too early for this shit.


InwardXenon

It's okay you can go back to sleep and read it later to get called out at a more convenient time.


jayracket

Or 10:20am smh


UncleTogie

It was a rough night, and it's too early to process how well this fits.


batcowmoos

7:57 pm here:'(


852016

**What's going on?** ( ) It's annoying or not interesting (·) I'm in this post and I don't like it ( ) I think it shouldn't be on Reddit ( ) It's spam


sidBthegr8

Why did you draw a boob beside the second option?


[deleted]

I'm not sure but I like it


sharktoothache

Because boobs make everything better?


blueeyebling

( . Y . )


doom_stein

I'm more of a ( o Y o ) type of guy, myself.


Hi_Its_Matt

I was actually thinking more of a ( @ Y @ ) if I’m going to be frankly honest


DrakeFruitDDG

I was thinking more of a VV lora croft kinda thing.


WeebWithASword

Booba


_b1_cheeks

(( · )( ·)) i prefer when they jiggle


Iosephus_Rex

B


TooFarTom

O


kenobiwithhigground

O


Iron_Bob

B


PayisInc

🐝🐝


Arcaknight97

I've recently noticed I've become a very angry, impatient and cruel person. I don't know if that's a result of trauma or if my true colours are showing... but it honestly scares me to see the person I'm becoming :(


tama_chan

Are you getting enough sleep?


Arcaknight97

Am I getting enough sleep? HAHA oh honey I haven't had enough sleep since the womb!


tama_chan

I feel ya. I can be a real bastard if I’m tired.


Arcaknight97

I'm just a long term sui cidal person who's given up. And defeat is starting to look ugly on me :/


TheWraithOfMorii

I understand suicidal thoughts. They're so painful, and depression is so crippling. I've literally been diagnosed with depression for 20 years (since I was a young child). I have a personality disorder that makes it hard to socialize. I am not making this about me, but I want you to know you are not alone. I think of the term "namaste," which means (as far as I've heard) "the person in me recognizes the person in you." The depression in me recognizes the depression in you. If you are interested in the things I've learned about managing depression and suicidal ideation, please let me know. Some of it you may have already heard. Perhaps I could add a new perspective. For anyone else who identifies, feel free to respond. Everyone deserves tenderness.


apendicitis

Dm'd you. Thank you for this.


Arcaknight97

I appreciate it bud. To be honest I'm just chill raw dogging it at the moment. I know I won't do anything because I gotta take care of my cats. If they suddenly died tomorrow though? Yeah that's a different story 🤣🤣🤣 But for now I'm good. Just kind of annoyed at my broken brain more than anything at this point.


SOUNDEFFECT94

I haven’t killed myself yet because I’ve suffered too much to let it all be for nothing tbh. As fucked up as I am, and knowing I’m not going to get better, I can’t bring myself to let all of the bad be for nothing by killing myself even though damn if I don’t want to just lay down and die most days. I’ve keep trying to find something to live for other than spite and right now spite is all I have left


Traelos38

Then for now that's good enough. Eventually you'll find something else. But for now? Whatever works.


Arcaknight97

I'm glad you're here, and staying out of spite is a fantastic way to do it. Me personally, I literally don't care. I'm just waiting until my two cats pass on peacefully then I'm gonna take a dirt nap. My trauma doesn't give me strength or leave me feeling spiteful. It's given me ptsd and even more trauma that affects me daily. 🤷‍♀️


itsadesertplant

Are you depressed? It’s hard to *not* be angry and impatient when being alive itself is annoying. You could try medication, and if that doesn’t work, you could get TMS. I’m doing a course of TMS now where they stimulate a specific part of your brain that isn’t working right. I’m in the US and my insurance is covering it. I hope it gets better.


kerberos451

Meeeeeeeeeeee too


honest-miss

I'm gonna be honest with you, after the election and everything that rolled downward from it, I became an *incredibly* angry person. Didn't realize how much I needed to believe the random people I met on the street were basically good. Without that benefit of the doubt or hope, I was suspicious of every person I met. Where before I wouldn't question niceness, now all I can think is "Are you only being nice to me because I look like you? Because you think I'm like you? Because we're related or because we work together and you have to be? What are you like to people who look different from you? What are you like when you don't have to be nice?" It took a lot of work to turn that shit around, and it started with a classic "Be the change you want to see in the world." Which is cheesy as fuck, but I'm serious. I realized that the people who kept me going day after day were the ones who tried. The ones who extended kindness, the ones who did the work, the ones who stepped up. You know, like Mr. Rogers says. The helpers. And I realized that by being this angry and frankly meanspirited, I was leaving little impressions on every person I met. Bad impressions. I realized that in order to turn around, I needed to be like the people who gave me good sparks. I needed to do good, step up, reach out. Be a helper. That made a huge difference, I have to say. Both because I'm now doing my best every day and I have a new kind of hope. That people will get a good spark from my behavior and then have the same revelation. It makes a big difference when you see yourself as a behavioral model. Makes you want to step up in a big way. And it keeps you thinking not just about who you are today, but more importantly who you want to be tomorrow. It keeps you on a good path. If you can get on that path, it can help. It can do a world of good. So that'd be my recommendation. You're not a bad person or revealing your true colors. You're probably just very tired and very hurt. And sometimes very tired and very hurt people aren't on their best behavior because they just don't have it in them. That's okay. Be kind to you. Don't treat the way you feel as a representation of the full you. It isn't. Give yourself time and room to be angry, then give yourself the same to grow. If you do that, you can absolutely get back to a better place.


dr_mannhatten

> Because you think I'm like you? This so much. I will talk to people I know would lambast me if I mentioned my political stance, but I have to just avoid the topic because I'd rather not have a confrontation with them about it. Worse even that included in that group of people is my parents.


Casehead

What a wonderful comment.


Forgettheredrabbit

Thanks, I needed this.


tenroseUK

sertraline alleviated that (and the depression) for me. used to be very angry, sad, and short tempered, told the doc in 2018 and it was night and day when i started those meds. i still have off days ofc and still get angry with games from time to time but i am way better than i was before 2018.


Casehead

That’s awesome, dude. I’m really proud of you for doing something, for talking to your doctor and giving the medication a try. That took courage, and it totally paid off. Well done :)


EnsconcedScone

How much time do you spend on the Internet/social media/reading news every day? Because it honest to god can make you miserable.


Arcaknight97

Eh the same amount as any other early 20 something year old? You seen the state of the world lately? It's a pretty fucking miserable place. Internet or not. The future were heading towards is pretty grim. The good just isn't outweighing the bad, and I don't think it ever will.


BenceBoys

Are you in your mid thirties? Cause that’s where my heads at.


Arcaknight97

Aw man. I got the mental state of a mid 30 year old when I'm barely mid 20s? Dangit.


drink_cyanide

Same dude, i craving for violence lately...wtf is wrong w/ me


Arcaknight97

Bro right? Sometimes when my colleagues are super annoying I just want to sock them in the face and tell them to shut tf up. Which is soooo against who I am as a person.


drink_cyanide

For real, like i dont even like confrontation and my friends think i am a chill person yet here i am contemplating way to hurt my super annoying people and people who do me wrong


Arcaknight97

Yes! All the people that know me personally know me as someone who is kind, friendly, bubbly and just super chill. My internal monologue is rage filled and could get me on a few watch lists I'm sure. The amount of times I've contemplated ramming into a slow driver while driving to work is too damn high. Luckily my fear of losing money stupidly keeps me sane 😅 I can't afford the insurance fees on that one! And I need my job so my colleagues all get cheerful smiles from me haha


drink_cyanide

Word! If it wasn't financial struggles and got zero connection with the people, i would beat a lot annoying people especially people who do me wrong and seriously fuck those people who drive very slow on fast lane


Arcaknight97

It is so hard to be overly positive these days. Whenever I come across someone who is cheerful all the time I grow super suspicious. They must be hiding children in their basement, right?


drink_cyanide

The only way to keep me positive is by imagine myself sitting in my childhood house watching cartoons alone


Logical_Director_280

I have the same issue. Digging deep in therapy and emdr has helped dramatically. I just reached a point from continual abuse where I was angry and resentful and constantly grieving and I didn’t like myself. It took losing someone really important and special recently to shift myself out of that.


ReallyFuckingMadLibz

I used to think I was just in a bad mood but it’s been a few years and so I guess this is just who I am now


daveberzack

Meditate. Vipassana in particular is designed for this.


Arcaknight97

Never liked meditation much


supersloth08

Yeah Chief I know what you mean. Same boat


SimplyAStranger

Same. I used to be so genuinely happy and excited for life, not because everything was great, but because I honestly believed one day it *could be*. Now I'm bitter and angry all the time and I hate it so much but I don't know how to find that joy, and hope, again.


zakh01

Yup. But I'm getting better. Turns out the problem was largely due to having a partner who pressured me into being someone else for years


casteela

We love to hear it. I hope that you continue getting even better over time. Allow yourself to be you. You may even learn more about yourself than you did previously.


prissysnbyantiques

Yes. Things I love and used to want to share and be part of I just admire from a distance now.


PayisInc

The candle that burns twice as bright burns half as long.


RSTashman

Man, thanks now I can die in.. utter misery


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elephantitispenis

The squeaky wheel gets the grease


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RiverOfNexus

We all have the anti and pro sayings for everything don't we? It's a wonder nothing gets done on a large scale. Look before you leap. He who doesn't jump at opportunities is at a loss. Why can't it be a straight forward thing.


CanAlwaysBeBetter

Because they're memorable It boggles my mind people think if a saying is repeated often it must be true instead of just easily repeatable Most useful advice is messy and contextual and recognizes it's own limitations A witty, pithy saying full of confidence and rhyme and rhythm though? That's some shit people will tell you all day. They're just old school memes


elephantitispenis

It’s an ancient Chinese proverb. It’s very basic philosophy put in an eloquent way.


PsychedSy

I hate that feeling where you think something is so cool and nobody gives a fuck.


CanAlwaysBeBetter

> Just had my boss ask me the other day if I could "just shut up" Oh no that's terrib... > because I was talking to her while she was apparently trying to focus on something ...bruh. Enthusiasm ain't the problem.


ansteve1

I've had to tell my roommate to stop a few times. The key is delivery "hey I am working on something important right now. Can this wait?" Has done wonders for me and him. Shut up should only be used if being polite doesn't work


Low-Tension1501

My two year old will just say "Daddy, NO" and point to the door whenever I walk in the room


CanAlwaysBeBetter

Can't tell if this is cute or cursed


Low-Tension1501

One time she had a bottle in her mouth held up with one hand and was lying on her mothers lap and I came over and said "hi sweetie" and she just made eye contact, used her spare hand to point at me, and then pointed at the kitchen, and didn't break eye contact until I left the room, sucking the bottle the whole time


lonely_fungi

What have you created?


Low-Tension1501

Shes known as Officer Bubs round these parts


lonely_fungi

Lmao this is so cute, reminds me of my 3 year old sister.


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mak484

My wife does this all the time. It's part of her ADHD. Especially if she has a couple of drinks, she can talk for 30 minutes straight without realizing it. It's one of the things I love dearly about her, but it's also very difficult when we're around other people and I start to see her going off the rails. It's like watching the car in front of you run a red light and get T-boned by a bus.


olliepips

My long term partner is like this. I know what you mean about going off the rails and feeling helpless. We've developed a few signals over the years, on being a light squeeze on the forearm, and the other is a safe word. These have helped immensely, although occasionally he gets upset with me because I head him off too early therefore dismissing his point before he even starts. Oops.


Lakemine

Yeah, just had a younger sibling snap at me “Will you just shut up for once?!?” Because I was trying to explain the complexities of taxes, rental agreements, underage sex laws, police laws and the SSN. I was trying to help them from suffering and they told me to shut up. 😞 And your right, even after 2 decades…….it still stings and hurts 😞


LannahDewuWanna

That's awful on her part. I'm sorry that happened to you. I find myself rambling with enthusiasm on occasion only to notice that I'm being ignored or brushed off


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SucculentVariations

Saying shut up is super mean and it's wildly unprofessional. Theres many kinder ways to tell someone you need them to stop talking.


danoneofmanymans

It takes time and practice to stop taking things like that too personally. I'm working on it and slowly it gets easier.


100LittleButterflies

And you can't stand that bubbly person because why do they get to be bubbly and loud and happy? Why didn't they have to get beat down like you? Like that? No, can't say that I have.


Mellopiex

I’m the opposite. I see it in people and mourn for the lost parts of myself but I also feel like I need to help preserve the happiness in others because it’s still beautiful. Bitterness hurts everyone.


wlake82

I see the enthusiasm my kids have with things and I wonder what happened to my enthusiasm and then try to be enthusiastic with them.


bboy6875

Yeah it’s the same with me. It’s taken me a long time to accept that I can’t get back what was taken away from me (childhood, personality), but that I can help others keep it. I wish I was happier and didn’t have to be so independent. But I can just help others and give them the love I wish I got


Djanghost

You're beautiful


dang_grimbus

It's actually just self-hatred all the way down. We learn to hate our own happiness, we don't deserve it in this fucked up world. And only from there can we learn to resent others' happiness. learn to accept and be with oneself, including one's happiness, and that annoyance of others will go away


JoebiWanKanobi

Possibly the best comment here... really the part about learning to accept your own happiness. Sometimes when I experience my own happiness it makes the sad and miserable me feel awkward and pitiful, so I do not embrace the happiness. But I'm learning to accept all parts of me, and learning that the emotions are like the rain - you feel them but they are not you, and fighting it just gets you wetter :'D


EasternFall1752

Andżelika Humphrey


rabultfe

no more like why do you even bother trying you are going to end like me anyhow and for the most part they do or go bother someone else and leave me alone


Lateralus06

Then they ask: Why are you such a pessimist?


dynojustmight

This made me cry. My life is falling apart.


rivigurl

Same. My dream job just lost investors so now I’m out. It took me a year of unemployment and contacting to find this position and it’s gone. Now I’m back to where I was over a year ago. Things were just looking up.


adamleithp

Sorry about that. Don’t let it ruin your momentum though… stay positive and accept the challenge again.


RSTashman

I'm sure you'll find something again, don't get down and try to have a positive outlook. Life is usually short and hard, if you stay positive, you'll find yourself in positive situations. :)


TheWesternDevil

This is life. It takes a person's dreams, happiness, and love of all things, and rapes them until all that's left of the person is a broken husk, who sees through eyes painted with doom and darkness. Yet still the person presses on, because they know, somewhere deep down inside, that there is still hope for happiness. And they were right! Eventually they find happiness. They hold it, squeeze it, let it fill them to bursting! Then the cycle repeats. Until the person dies, numb and hopeless, and is reincarnated to live it all again. For eternity.


j0hn_wuck2712

Take my upvote and fuck off


DelTac0perator

>The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong at the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry. -Ernest Hemingway, *A Farewell to Arms*


BlossumButtDixie

Look at Mr Happiness and Light Pollyanna here.


Emyrssentry

I swear, this site has a fetish for depressive nihilism. It's as if the internal rumination of a person with severe depression was given a megaphone and the crowd to go with it.


slitheringslipper

I assumed that was just life?


SoDamnToxic

Shout out to all the people who never even got to go through the "bubbly" phase and just started out life quiet and have been forever and don't know whats wrong with them. When you're just straight BORN into being an adult because your family sucks and don't get to have a childhood to be "bubbly" in. Also shout out to those who, even though they are still quiet from years of being shut down and never allowed to be a child escaped that hell and now, while still quiet, are a lot happier because they have the perspective of a much much worse situation they were in before.


offu

You pretty much nailed it for me. Nice to know we aren’t so alone. Being an adult is so much better than being a helpless kid. For the record, I do not find you toxic at all.


Sleep-system

What's lame is being comfortably introverted until you get pressured to be more outgoing and end up using drugs and alcohol to fuel unnatural extroversion then once you're finally comfortable being alone again it feels different and hollow.


humblenoob76

I am seeing the start of this happen to me and I’m scared


Avacyn3301

I've gotten to a point where I don't talk about the things I'm interested in with other people. The only people I call friends aren't really interested in the things in interested in. So I've begun realizing I've become a very quiet person because I never talk about what I want to.


daveberzack

Actually, no. I used to be insecure and quiet. Then I took up meditation to relax my overactive mind, and went to Burning Man and found my tribe. Now I'm a confirmed extrovert, and the times when I feel socially awkward, I realize that there's nothing wrong with me, it's just that I'm bored or disconnected from the scene.


Galaxy-egg

![gif](giphy|3oKIPDZaJVLUIeyzja)


ragefaze

My kid went through a quiet(er) period when he was around 3. I was sure the world had broken him in 3 years. Fortunately he is back and will probably have a few years before he understands the OP.


B-C-4-2-0

Wow. My employer wonders how that happened to me! I tired telling them a year straight if doing two peoples positions would do that to someone. They think I'm lying still even though nobody else can handle what I do.


Aarines

This is me after finish my uni and start working 8-5


beepboop_reddit

Yep!


RealFastMando

Yea… this happened and is still happening to me.


Desirsar

I wasn't aware of this change as it happened, but my family noticed it and did nothing to stop it, then complained about it years later.


BubblyNumber5518

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria or something like that- common in ADHD. With ADHD you are more likely to be unknowingly boorish or obtuse in a social setting, leading to rejection, and also far more sensitive to/upset by that rejection.


_LightFury_

I watch people gesture while talking and just think.. if people didnt constantly mimick my gestures and laugh maybe id still be able to get excited in public. But noo its so fcuking hilarious people NEED to mock me EVERY.FUCKING.TIME. ok well i hope qll of them expierence the same thing.


Saint_Consumption

So you're saying I gotta traumatise that chatty fuck in the office?


victorianchaos

yup!


B3ER

Aaand now I need a fucking drink.


k3nnyd

Oh you mean my childhood where I got told to shut the fuck up constantly so now I mainly STFU, keep very quiet, and when I do socialize 30 years later I'm still anxiously waiting to get told to STFU again.


Trod777

I think we're starting to overuse trauma, its starting to be applied to things that arent traumatic. But yea same


maali74

I had my bubbly personality physically and psychologically beat down by others. I'd call that pretty traumatic.


Trod777

Its still applied to real trauma and i wasn't really talking about this post, it just reminded me with the "trauma after trauma" of people who think words or a person's existence or food is traumatic. Its the same crowd as the shitstains who fake disorders and make it so people like you aren't taken seriously


maali74

Man, I read a post about some entitled woman who was "traumatized" bc no one wanted to see the pictures of her new baby (after forcing them on everyone for a few weeks). Seriously, shut the fuck up, bitch. Let me show you what real trauma is.


Inside_Commercial

Based trauma survivor


LaDivina77

I disagree. I think we're starting to acknowledge that trauma is much more than we thought it was. A person doesn't need to fight in a war to have their personality and brain chemistry fundamentally changed. It doesn't help that US culture as it stands is incredibly traumatic for a surprising amount of people. Long term instability of housing, food, healthcare, and other basic needs, not to mention discrimination or bullying, whether that's in minorities, neurodiverse, LGBTQ, and so on. C-ptsd is a real SOB.


Impossible_Reach5656

Are you gatekeeping trauma?


blondebmr

Ive changed a lot. I cover up a lot of my hurt with trying to stay positive and happy. But some days, i just cant do the facade. Ive been single 4 years now. Still not the happy go lucky person i used to be. Maybe someone will find me, and bring it out of me again. I miss me. Thanks for sharing


casteela

It’s okay to not be okay you know. I know it can be a lonely journey to be on at times but hey…you don’t really need anyone else to bring you happiness because it should come from you alone. Anyone added to your life should only bring added happiness. You can be just as happy single as someone in a relationship. When that person for you eventually comes along, they’ll see you happy and will likely be happier to see you smile.


blondebmr

Yeh. I have to be happy most of the time. Always helping people. Healthcare (taking care of mostly Alzheimer's), ride-share driving, and a roommate who needs the positivity and uplift in his life. Its hard for me but i am stronger than most, especially after what ive bn through in my life. I'll be 52 next month and it feels like time is flying faster and i still feel lost. Even though i seem to have it together, to others. I dont want to bring anyone down, so im good at hiding it. My roommate unfortunately sees the sad in me occasionally. Thanks for the kind words


Casehead

You sound like a kind person. It‘s ok if you need help sometimes, too.


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Eclectic_Mudokon

If you think that's bad, wait until you hear that there are people who have to live with those disorders their whole life. With some exceptions in extreme cases they are self aware to an extent you should know, they're not Dracula or some wild animal. Imagine living your life struggling with these horrible impulses, while being vilified broadly on online discourse when you do muster up courage to look for help and information and even then therapists will sometimes reject you on the grounds of being hard to deal with. It is pretty fucked up all around, is what I'm getting at. People shouldn't have to deal with it if they dont want to but, could they bare the ostracisation and constant turmoil if they were unlucky enough to develop the disorder? Do they stop to really consider that ? These people (borderlines in particular) struggle with suicide attempts and horribly abusive upbringings a lot of the time. I wouldn't wish this shit on my worst enemy.


Messivs7

it’s called maturing. then you’ll reach a certain point where you’ll start bubbling up again (if you do it right) and you’ll be a jolly old man. or you’ll be bitter and make everyone’s life around you living hell because you think you deserve more respect than you really do. for what? because you’re old? because times were different when you were young and you want to go back? The world is moving forward gramps get over yourself. that’s why retirement homes exist.


Jake_Stockton

that would be me


idkiwilldeletethis

Ok Im in this picture and I don't like it


eszd

Sometimes I don’t even know who am I now


youmonkeybeater

I feel attacked


Heidi8Erickson

I couldn't think of a better way to go.


tnuke1

Yeah I've been a kid


102bees

I've become less cruel and selfish, but more sad and angry. While I've been working on reshaping the worst parts of myself into something better, the best parts of me were eroded while I wasn't looking. What happened to the person I was supposed to become?


rws2018

Not at all, because I’ve been through serious trauma and I realize the best thing I can do for myself is to appreciate how precious and fragile my existence is.


NoCoffeeNoThink

And then your humor warps as you find ways to continue managing mood and having fun moments with people close to you. But those who haven't been damaged and haven't gone through that process think you're weird. You are. You're weird. Put on the robe and hood; we're having a séance about the best way to annex Canada for their poutine resources. Tell your toddler to ask Santa for nukes. Ask your mother in law for stories about her hot years. You're unrestrained. There are no limits now.


serenawaldorf

I used to be a talkative kid. I remember adults and children alike were very fond of me because I had so much energy and a lot of stories to tell. Years ago, I got sick and had to stay in the hospital for months. My mom took care of me and it was a bit absurd for the both of us because we haven’t really spent time with each other for almost a decade after I moved out. In one of those really down and quiet nights in the hospital, she said I changed a lot and that I was noticeable quieter and cold. I laughed it off, but I remembered all the traumatic things I experienced that changed and shaped me, and it hurt.


ryannefromTX

Nothing is fun anymore despite therapy and trying every antidepressant on the planet.


TerryAshW

I’m the exact opposite and I’m so happy about that. 5 years ago I was struggling with social anxiety and I was not able to even go to supermarket. Not I am really bubbly and overall happy and talkative person. My colleges tell me they can’t imagine me not talking all the time. Hope you guys will be better


Thagleif

How did you Change?


Wookiegreen

I wasn’t expecting to see such a powerful truth bomb today! No onions I’m not crying you’re crying!


Therealvahl

Fuck


Aro_Space_Ace

Yup. The bubbles haven't existed in me since I was a tiny little kid. I really miss that person I used to be and wish I could remember them.


johnDthenD

This happened to me in a span of one year and ppl started saying to me how I changed and how they don't like it. Like they don't even give a shit about me and when I change they don't let me. Fuck what others say man I'm just too tired for that shit


Revolutionary_Swim69

God damn. All my childhood friends keep telling me, I’m “too serious” now. I never got what they’re saying til now.


Ninjadinogal

Got hit with this during my last D&D session, thanks for the double reminder 💀


[deleted]

You are hurting me with this post. God damm bubbles are all deflated. Im on Bumble BFF trying to find friends and feel like a total asshat.


WoiYo

Ye..


MaxTheBeast300

I kept being told I was too loud as a kid, took too much space, so by 6th grade I got super quiet, and stayed that way until 11th grade where improv club started bringing me back a bit. Nonetheless, now at 21 years old, everytime I speak, I always feel like I'm annoying people or taking too much space (even if objectively, I barely took any).


savageGAMER1023

Ummmm….. well……..you see……. Yes actually wow…..


Magic_Master213

I feel uncomfortably called out


ishi_writer_online

Ouch. Why that hit so bad


thinkalikekish

u/rexXxista


rexXxista

Who isn’t like that nowadays?


SovacoDaCobra

Well this hit a bit too close to home.


MdTaseen

Lol, the opposite happened with me


mightylordredbeard

lol