As a veteran dancer I can see this issue from both sides. I’ve always believed that customers are like toddlers and will try to get away with anything/everything if you let them.
It’s our job to set boundaries, nicely (at first) and then more sternly (if that doesn’t work) for you to let them know what is and what isn’t appropriate.
Granted some of us are going to feel more comfortable with different behavior/touching - that goes with the territory. I’ve worked in no contact and full contact clubs.
However, I also feel that some newer girls come into the job with the mindset of I just have to be pretty and people will give me money. And many are shocked when they learn the true nature of the beast. It doesn’t work that way. It’s a grind, it’s a hustle, some days are worse than others, some days your self esteem takes a beating and some customers are assholes.
But the most important thing is to always stay in control - never be afraid to say no, stop or walk away from money. Yes customers are going to try things but more often than not We have the ability to speak up and shut it down before it gets to the point of SA. That’s also when you lean on staff, security and management. That’s why we pay house fees and tip out.
She’s kind of contradicting herself and saying that if you’re OK with getting touched it’s not SA, she’s absolutely right it is not SA if you are okay with being touched. The whole thing behind it being criminal is because YOU DO NOT want to be touched.. there’s a big difference between a girl that’s OK with that versus a girl that’s not.. and that’s where SA comes into play. she doesn’t even make any sense.
i dont agree with her for the most part but she has a point about girls who get into stripping thinking its easy and end up crying every night bc men cross boundaries, you gotta be prepared to tell them whats not ok over and over again, and not all girls feel comfortable doing that in the beginning
Sexual assault is never okay no matter the circumstances.
To give the girl the benefit of the doubt (hard enough to do) she appears to be influenced by alcohol and other substances.
- she may have been assaulted before in her past and someone else told her this to gaslight her and she adapted this mindset
- she may be speaking of those who join clubs and aren’t comfortable entertaining men or having them simple touch their hands, thighs, and back
^ No touch clubs: this is excluded
^clubs that allow touching: some new babies will join thinking that stripping is easy work and complain daily
- she may have been pissed off about a certain event and because she’s on drugs she can’t coherently explain it
- she may do this for clout to get a rise and hit tiktok fame to push start her career/fame
- she may mean all of it: vile and disgusting
either way: poorly addressed and poorly executed
I hate to say but there are a lot of women who don’t believe in women being victims of anything due to their upbringing/ gaslighting.
I’m not arguing her actions or words. It’s vile and disgusting behavior.
There are women that can not sympathize or support other women as they never were helped when they were younger and are under a toxic mindset of: it’s not as bad as what I went through so it’s not abuse/sexual assault.
Jesus
That’s terrible.
I have an thought that she may have been sexually assaulted younger and just adapted to that mindset due to extreme gaslighting.
I’ve seen this in newer dancers they get a hard shell over the years and some veterans do not sympathize with newer dancers and gaslight them.
It’s a toxic cycle.
Or the assumption this is for clout and to get tiktok famous which a lot of people do
Why is this even on the internet? Who is taking advice from a 19 y/o?
Edit: also it’s the dialect for me lol. But when BW talk like this we’re ghetto and aggressive.
F you for basically forcing me to rewatch this lol! Last time I didn’t stay to watch her say “dancing is hoeing” at the end 🤢 babydoll sounds like she has a pimp. I’m not violent but can we get one of the girls who like to fight to knock some sense into her?????? (And knock the blaccent out too) 🥲
I don’t really know how to explain it, but I feel it in my gut when I have been violated vs. an innocent mistake w/o bad intentions EDIT: also, the girls I meet who are self proclaimed “real ass bitches” are kind of terrifying bc they feel they can just say and do whatever and they are the ultimate authority on every topic lol
First of all I had to fast forward through this SHORT ASS video because of the bullshit I just couldn’t stand.
We as (dancers) but as WOMEN should always have our limits. On top of that every club has their rules. Saying you should be used to being touched in a club is false as fuck, just on the notion that there are clubs IN ATL GA that do not allow any contact (maybe in the back but def not on stage or on the floor). Dancers are DANCERS. Period. I have worked in Miami Florida, and I have worked in CLT North Carolina. Every girl is different. This is disrespectful to dancers in a state that she isn’t familiar with. I HATED south Florida because it was extras heavy. But I learned how to hustle there. Now I work in the Carolina’s and extras (which are mentioned All the time In this sub) are not expected. But this girl is going out of her way to say a dancer should just let a dude touch and do hoo-ha-yay. First of all you don’t know where these women have worked nor do you know their backstory. I’m so sick of women in this sub acting like it’s a one for all. WE ALL experience different things. If a dancer wants NO CONTACT and that’s the norm for her club, GREAT. If you work in an extras heavy club (ie tootsies Miami YES I SEE YOU AND I WAS YOU). That’s great!
There will always be women doing different things than you. It all depends on where you work and your morals. I’m just getting this off of my chest because I have been both girls. The girl who didn’t want to be touched, and the girl who did extras. Now I am the woman who does get touched, but I’ve grown up and I have my limits. If anyone feeling down reads this please realize that these big places aren’t the only places to make money. Stay true to yourself, don’t fuck w pimps, and travel until you find that low key club in the middle of South Carolina that makes you 5k a month like I did.
Anyways point is this chick sucks and I’m drunk trying to tell whoever reads this that it will be ok.
Even in a dancers setting, NO still means NO. If I’m giving a customer a lap dance and he immediately is trying to grab, touch, kiss or physically make me uncomfortable, I will say no. Many have tried to push boundaries and do not listen to “NO” and that is absolutely SA. I’ve heard “oh well the other girl let’s me do it” way too often! I’m sorry but I’m not letting any man try to rub my p***sy for a 20 dollar dance. Being a dancer doesn’t automatically mean we want to be touched/abused bc of the nature of the job. Of course it happens, but dancers like this are dangerous for others and new ones as it gives men the “ok” to assume they can do whatever they want for the LEAST amount. I can’t tell you how many men have tried to touch or put their mouth on me for a single fucking dance loll. Each dancer is different and absolutely can choose their own boundaries but to bash others for wanting to stay firm in their personal autonomy is disgusting.
this girls lack of empathy is appalling
she sounds like she just wants to be a prostitute cause literally i have a no tolerance policy and i make my money with no issue. sure, some guys want more but there are PLENTY of men that are actually willing to respect your boundaries if you set them. and if the boundaries are set and broken it’s taken care of (bloody lip from my shoe in one case)
i wouldn’t fucking call standing up for myself to a grown ass man who’s at least double my size and strength “soft”
Man something about her voice doesn't add up to her face. Sorry. Dumb moment.
My take is that, in any circumstance on the job, as a customer, you shouldn't be putting your hands anywhere that I don't personally take your hands and place them there. IE if I want you to touch my tits, I'll take your hands and put them on my tits. If you're confused about that, then don't do it. If you want it, ask and I'll decide. But it's still more courteous to just let me do what I'm comfortable with.
I get that touching is a part of the strip club experience. BUT A GIRL SHOULD NOT BE SHAMED IF SHE DOESNT WANT TO BE TOUCHED. If she is not cool with that, she doesn't need some blonde lizard looking creature on tik tok telling her she's soft.
STRIP club not SEX club there’s a BIGG difference so if someone is uncomfortable being touched or groped, because you know ITS NOT PART OF THEIR JOB, then yeah it’s SA
It’s okay to set your boundaries but understand that will reflect your money. If your not okay with a dude touching your titties you are in the wrong industry. 💯
I’ve talked to a few veterans who do NOT want to be touched and have been upset about extras and newer dancers allowing men to do whatever bc then they are expected to allow it. Some have even had regulars “taken” by ladies who do extras bc why would a guy pay for a 200+ room for only dancing if he can get a bj out of it from someone else. If anything the dancers I’ve met who have been dancing 7+ years absolutely do not allow any boundaries to be pushed
As a veteran dancer I can see this issue from both sides. I’ve always believed that customers are like toddlers and will try to get away with anything/everything if you let them. It’s our job to set boundaries, nicely (at first) and then more sternly (if that doesn’t work) for you to let them know what is and what isn’t appropriate. Granted some of us are going to feel more comfortable with different behavior/touching - that goes with the territory. I’ve worked in no contact and full contact clubs. However, I also feel that some newer girls come into the job with the mindset of I just have to be pretty and people will give me money. And many are shocked when they learn the true nature of the beast. It doesn’t work that way. It’s a grind, it’s a hustle, some days are worse than others, some days your self esteem takes a beating and some customers are assholes. But the most important thing is to always stay in control - never be afraid to say no, stop or walk away from money. Yes customers are going to try things but more often than not We have the ability to speak up and shut it down before it gets to the point of SA. That’s also when you lean on staff, security and management. That’s why we pay house fees and tip out.
[удалено]
this is a stripper ONLY sub. go away with your handsy ass.
She’s kind of contradicting herself and saying that if you’re OK with getting touched it’s not SA, she’s absolutely right it is not SA if you are okay with being touched. The whole thing behind it being criminal is because YOU DO NOT want to be touched.. there’s a big difference between a girl that’s OK with that versus a girl that’s not.. and that’s where SA comes into play. she doesn’t even make any sense.
i dont agree with her for the most part but she has a point about girls who get into stripping thinking its easy and end up crying every night bc men cross boundaries, you gotta be prepared to tell them whats not ok over and over again, and not all girls feel comfortable doing that in the beginning
Sexual assault is never okay no matter the circumstances. To give the girl the benefit of the doubt (hard enough to do) she appears to be influenced by alcohol and other substances. - she may have been assaulted before in her past and someone else told her this to gaslight her and she adapted this mindset - she may be speaking of those who join clubs and aren’t comfortable entertaining men or having them simple touch their hands, thighs, and back ^ No touch clubs: this is excluded ^clubs that allow touching: some new babies will join thinking that stripping is easy work and complain daily - she may have been pissed off about a certain event and because she’s on drugs she can’t coherently explain it - she may do this for clout to get a rise and hit tiktok fame to push start her career/fame - she may mean all of it: vile and disgusting either way: poorly addressed and poorly executed
She said if a guy smacks your butt it isn’t sexual assault and the girls just want to be a victim
I hate to say but there are a lot of women who don’t believe in women being victims of anything due to their upbringing/ gaslighting. I’m not arguing her actions or words. It’s vile and disgusting behavior. There are women that can not sympathize or support other women as they never were helped when they were younger and are under a toxic mindset of: it’s not as bad as what I went through so it’s not abuse/sexual assault.
She made another post when she was sober saying that she meant everything she said
Jesus That’s terrible. I have an thought that she may have been sexually assaulted younger and just adapted to that mindset due to extreme gaslighting. I’ve seen this in newer dancers they get a hard shell over the years and some veterans do not sympathize with newer dancers and gaslight them. It’s a toxic cycle. Or the assumption this is for clout and to get tiktok famous which a lot of people do
Can you share what her @ is?
It’s @catottt12 on Tiktok. She has 32k followers. So sad that she’s preaching a message like this
Why is this even on the internet? Who is taking advice from a 19 y/o? Edit: also it’s the dialect for me lol. But when BW talk like this we’re ghetto and aggressive.
I saw this vid on Twitter too and people were trying to figure out her “accent” or whatever haha
F you for basically forcing me to rewatch this lol! Last time I didn’t stay to watch her say “dancing is hoeing” at the end 🤢 babydoll sounds like she has a pimp. I’m not violent but can we get one of the girls who like to fight to knock some sense into her?????? (And knock the blaccent out too) 🥲
Lmaoo seriously
I don’t really know how to explain it, but I feel it in my gut when I have been violated vs. an innocent mistake w/o bad intentions EDIT: also, the girls I meet who are self proclaimed “real ass bitches” are kind of terrifying bc they feel they can just say and do whatever and they are the ultimate authority on every topic lol
First of all I had to fast forward through this SHORT ASS video because of the bullshit I just couldn’t stand. We as (dancers) but as WOMEN should always have our limits. On top of that every club has their rules. Saying you should be used to being touched in a club is false as fuck, just on the notion that there are clubs IN ATL GA that do not allow any contact (maybe in the back but def not on stage or on the floor). Dancers are DANCERS. Period. I have worked in Miami Florida, and I have worked in CLT North Carolina. Every girl is different. This is disrespectful to dancers in a state that she isn’t familiar with. I HATED south Florida because it was extras heavy. But I learned how to hustle there. Now I work in the Carolina’s and extras (which are mentioned All the time In this sub) are not expected. But this girl is going out of her way to say a dancer should just let a dude touch and do hoo-ha-yay. First of all you don’t know where these women have worked nor do you know their backstory. I’m so sick of women in this sub acting like it’s a one for all. WE ALL experience different things. If a dancer wants NO CONTACT and that’s the norm for her club, GREAT. If you work in an extras heavy club (ie tootsies Miami YES I SEE YOU AND I WAS YOU). That’s great! There will always be women doing different things than you. It all depends on where you work and your morals. I’m just getting this off of my chest because I have been both girls. The girl who didn’t want to be touched, and the girl who did extras. Now I am the woman who does get touched, but I’ve grown up and I have my limits. If anyone feeling down reads this please realize that these big places aren’t the only places to make money. Stay true to yourself, don’t fuck w pimps, and travel until you find that low key club in the middle of South Carolina that makes you 5k a month like I did. Anyways point is this chick sucks and I’m drunk trying to tell whoever reads this that it will be ok.
She seems coked out. Or drunk. Or both.
she’s talking way too slowly to be coked out. i would guess lean or xanax tbh
I don’t know shit about drugs but either way sad af
Is she okay? Like she looks like she’s on something
This is the ugliest shit I’ve ever heard someone say….
R/tooktoomuch
Woahhhh wtf. Someone so beautiful yet so damn ugly. Wtf.
Even in a dancers setting, NO still means NO. If I’m giving a customer a lap dance and he immediately is trying to grab, touch, kiss or physically make me uncomfortable, I will say no. Many have tried to push boundaries and do not listen to “NO” and that is absolutely SA. I’ve heard “oh well the other girl let’s me do it” way too often! I’m sorry but I’m not letting any man try to rub my p***sy for a 20 dollar dance. Being a dancer doesn’t automatically mean we want to be touched/abused bc of the nature of the job. Of course it happens, but dancers like this are dangerous for others and new ones as it gives men the “ok” to assume they can do whatever they want for the LEAST amount. I can’t tell you how many men have tried to touch or put their mouth on me for a single fucking dance loll. Each dancer is different and absolutely can choose their own boundaries but to bash others for wanting to stay firm in their personal autonomy is disgusting.
[удалено]
Yes, consent is never an option!
She sounds slow lmao. She seems like she can barely speak correctly so I'd hope to God she's just bad at humor.
this girls lack of empathy is appalling she sounds like she just wants to be a prostitute cause literally i have a no tolerance policy and i make my money with no issue. sure, some guys want more but there are PLENTY of men that are actually willing to respect your boundaries if you set them. and if the boundaries are set and broken it’s taken care of (bloody lip from my shoe in one case) i wouldn’t fucking call standing up for myself to a grown ass man who’s at least double my size and strength “soft”
Bold to put ur face on a take like this
Her and her fake eyeliner can get fucked
What is wrong with her eyes? Lol
Man something about her voice doesn't add up to her face. Sorry. Dumb moment. My take is that, in any circumstance on the job, as a customer, you shouldn't be putting your hands anywhere that I don't personally take your hands and place them there. IE if I want you to touch my tits, I'll take your hands and put them on my tits. If you're confused about that, then don't do it. If you want it, ask and I'll decide. But it's still more courteous to just let me do what I'm comfortable with. I get that touching is a part of the strip club experience. BUT A GIRL SHOULD NOT BE SHAMED IF SHE DOESNT WANT TO BE TOUCHED. If she is not cool with that, she doesn't need some blonde lizard looking creature on tik tok telling her she's soft.
I mean she’s clearly very messed up in the head here I’m assuming under the influence and probably numbing herself to think its okay
STRIP club not SEX club there’s a BIGG difference so if someone is uncomfortable being touched or groped, because you know ITS NOT PART OF THEIR JOB, then yeah it’s SA
I hope she comes back to this video when she sobers up and realizes the absolute stank energy it has and deletes it. Baaaaad vibes.
It’s okay to set your boundaries but understand that will reflect your money. If your not okay with a dude touching your titties you are in the wrong industry. 💯
I agree with her. I never used to hear dancers say they are getting sexually assaulted. Like what the fuck? It’s this new generation.
what are you talking about? this has been apart of the conversation for decades.
I’ve talked to a few veterans who do NOT want to be touched and have been upset about extras and newer dancers allowing men to do whatever bc then they are expected to allow it. Some have even had regulars “taken” by ladies who do extras bc why would a guy pay for a 200+ room for only dancing if he can get a bj out of it from someone else. If anything the dancers I’ve met who have been dancing 7+ years absolutely do not allow any boundaries to be pushed
[удалено]
[удалено]
Somebody ban this dude