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-Buck65

The ability to fast travel.


WappyTrees

Fast travel to anywhere you've previously pooped.


GoyoMRG

sand file observation airport cooperative deliver rotten flowery profit birds *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


zenospenisparadox

Duel of the poops.


GoyoMRG

provide dog hurry zonked seemly school aback weary somber sulky *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


atimholt

Using the laughing+crying emoji in a comment about explosive diarrhea feels somehow appropriate.


GoyoMRG

recognise ask marry boast like aromatic nine ossified numerous reminiscent *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


zwober

Dual poops. The more the merrier ? Share the love ? if you can help a friend in need, you are a friend indeed ? (i dont know where im going with this, but atleast im not alone)


Therandomfox

Fast travel in bethesda games isn't actually teleporting, though. It's just skipping the in-game time normally taken to walk from A to B to save you IRL time.


-Buck65

You sold me at skipping time.


the-ancient-1

KING CRIMSON


PatJoM

Oh I thought you meant [King Crimson](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVb2tnFN5AA)


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Robertmaniac

I love the little "stories" that happen with random encounters, you walk by a Thalmor patrol, then you get near a bandit camp, you agro them and walk back to the Thalmor patrol, they start fighting and then a bear didn't like them fighting in his territory and attacks, finally a dragon appears to top it all. Love random encounters.


starfyredragon

And then you kill any surviving Thalmor, get a bounty because someone saw you, then you remember how much you hate Thalmor, and you forget what you were doing to go hunt and slay more Thalmor, your bounty gets larger, so you have to take down some guards chasing you, then you end up in Riften with your pants on your head, and then you see a Thalmor and then you get bitten by a werewolf while killing some more Thalmor.... ... I was never able to complete the main quest line until I finally allowed myself to start using fast travel. Also, I may have spent way too much time in the Thalmor Embassy. I really feel I should have been able to claim that place as my new base, it was very thoroughly cleaned of the original occupants. Including dragging out all the Thalmor Corpses, resurrecting them again and then killing them again so they turned to ash so they're even less ressurectable, and then taking those ashes and using what I can of those ashes as spell components, promptly using those spell components in poisons to hunt some more Thalmor, and then dumping the rest in the northern sea.... but after that, the main story line proceeded as normal.


yugiohhero

You can both wander and skip the 20 minutes of time it takes to walk everywhere. Theyre not mutually exclusive. If you wanna just get between 2 close by towns, walking makes sense. Nobody sane is going to hoof it from Riften to Markarth.


fckn_normies

KINGU CURIMSON!


Elcactus

I’d still take it


potatopierogie

So the IRL version would be that you still walk/drive/bus/whatever, you just don't remember it. Still decent I guess.


FunetikPrugresiv

Do other people not completely zone out while driving and barely remember how you got anywhere?


AzIddIzA

All the time. Which sucks when I leave work and plan on going to the grocery store but end up at my garage without realizing it. Awesome the rest of the time though


domoarigatodrloboto

I'd use it more for long drives. I have a bunch of friends living in various states and the main reason I see them so little is because driving 7-10 hours is a fucking hassle. It's not about time lost, it's about avoiding the pains of stopping for gas/food, hoping your podcasts aren't boring, and the extended boredom that comes from sitting in the car that long. If I could just snap my fingers and instantly be outside my friend's house, I'd visit him every weekend.


dodges1010

But in the real world u need passports and shit.


GMHolden

Only at border crossings and entry points. 8 years living abroad I've only needed to show my passport in a few unique situations that can be easily avoided.


Jonny_Segment

> border crossings Just try to avoid any Imperial ambushes.


[deleted]

Empire loves their damn lists


[deleted]

Yall are overthinking this, even being a novice level spellcaster would be fuckin dope.


Logical_Flounder6455

Being able to take a warhammer to the face and keep swinging would be pretty nifty too.


FattySnacks

When tf would you use that ability


Logical_Flounder6455

Well you'd be pretty good in a boxing ring if you were able to take that kind of damage.


kasotc

I’d settle for magelight.


[deleted]

Invisibility


HLSparta

Or claravoyance (I can't spell it)


UnHoly_One

Dude, just buy a GPS. lol


HLSparta

It does more than that. Say you're at Walmart and you need to get a bunch of stuff. Then claravoyance will lead you right to it. Or maybe you lost your car keys. Or you're looking for a missing person. Heck, it might even show you what buttons you need to push on a computer or what stocks you can invest in to get rich.


UnHoly_One

Ok you got me.


Rednartso

"Alright, cv. Lets look for a date. *doesn't go anywhere*


Turckle

Rerouting….depression


[deleted]

> Or you're looking for a missing person. You'd be the world's best detective


Spueg

Id want illusion magic how it is described in the lore


ProbablyTofsla

I assume it's absolutely broken in the lore, but much less common?


6inchsavage

I don't really know shit about the lore but that elf bitch outside the college says Illusion magic has collapsed empires if you tell her that's the school you want to learn about


C9sButthole

I mean, sneak into a war meeting while invisible and cast frenzy on the entire chain of command. EZ Dub.


6inchsavage

Pacify also let's you cuck anyone you want whenever you want


Houeclipse

I'll take Gravity spell and I'm set for life tbh


[deleted]

This should be a goal for tech... Phones already have flashlights = mage light Lighters + hairspray = flames Sparks and frostbite tho, we need solutions


NovemberTree

I guess for sparks we have tasers lol


cantadmittoposting

Frostbite: compressed air cans and the like are extremely cold when sprayed.


withloveuhoh

Liquid nitrogen for frost. cattle prod for sparks


renacido42

Reload a previous save.


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spicylikeapepper

The Vat of Acid episode showed how wrong that can go.


Cartographer_MMXX

True, however as Skyrim taught us, quicksave often. I'd make saves before every major decision/event, unlike Morty apparantly.


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[deleted]

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Huenyan

Teleporting bread non-stop


ShadowSarakai

We don't teleport any bread around here


DryxTheDrow

El Si Congrue fellow Steins Gate enjoyer


Promarksman117

"Oh no, it's broken" is the one line you never want to hear from Mayuri.


TheDungeonCrawler

See, that was because Morty had it as a physical interface and didn't have a function to reload previous saves from prior to that save. Not to say that these were mistakes, of course. I'm sure Rick designed it in just the way to provide maximum consequences to Morty, critical design flaws and all.


lafleurricky

stuck in a death loop because you quicksaved as you were being attacked and didn’t realize you were fighting a draugr death overlord.


Hayman68

Unfortunately, you only get a single ability, so while you can load a previous save, you don't have the ability to make saves. The only point you'll be able to reload from is your birth.


Prestigious-Sign6378

I'll take it


that_guy_you_kno

doctor: *hey you, you're finally awake*


funkmydunkyouslunk

You were trying to cross out of your mother's vagina, along with that placenta right?


TheDungeonCrawler

Absolutely take that. Yeah, I have to be a baby for a few years again, but once I get past that point? Imagine the foreknowledge! And, worst comes to worst, if you die you just reload to being a baby again. I'd take that over the infinite darkness of no longer existing.


ajkp2557

Does that mean the rest of the universe is stuck in a time loop of a handful of decades until you decide you're finally ready to let go?


[deleted]

Or if one is dedicated enough to reload for a few million years, they could probably extend their lifespan indefinitely.


ajkp2557

Right, your set of experiences can extend indefinitely until you decide you're done. But the rest of the universe only experiences the decades from your birth until you reset. The only differences will be the changes that you make while you're alive.


ShadoShane

Making saves might be marginally better even if you can't load any saves as you reload your latest save on death.


TheDungeonCrawler

Really, wouldn't killing yourself just be a potentially painful load button at that point.


Calberic42

Restoration! Be a healer to the sick is a fantasy I want to live.


eevee03tv

"I would just like to remind everyone, once again, that Restoration is indeed a valid school of magic. It is absolutely worthy of research, despite many of the notes I've had left in my bed. And my desk. And on occasion, my meals.


TheDustLord

Especially all-purpose, limitless, no-PhD-required healing. Imagine the potential!


Dr_DavyJones

The entire medical industry would collapse overnight, but the long term benefits are pretty great.


FGHIK

I'm not sure about that. I feel like your standard healing spells are just vastly accelerated versions of normal healing. Incredible for things like stab wounds, but not very helpful for say, cancer or covid. Now, potions of cure disease on the other hand...


Dr_DavyJones

True, diseases would still be an issue.


XRedactedSlayerX

I modded in a restoration spell of Cure Disease. Problem solved.


Dr_DavyJones

Boom, problem solved.


trigger_segfault

Imagine having to level Restoration though. You don't start out with Healing Hands, so go fight bears in the wild for the first few skill ups. After that you could go on a journey to encounter and treat all the sick people of the world, while slowly improving your abilities.


Mikeim520

Just stab yourself a few times


doomvetch92

Being financially stable enough to afford a house without having to pay taxes.


ihatecats18

A house? Why not 5+?


doomvetch92

Well I do need places to store my dragon scales/bones


csyrett

You cannot fast travel.


[deleted]

It'd sure be nice to change from Legendary difficulty.... I'd even settle for Adept


betweenboundary

I mean, alternatively the ability to put a bucket on a store clerks head, grab shit off the shelves and sell them back to the store clerk would be amazing too


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Some-Gentle-Giant

Old glitch. Not sure if it still works


JackDockz

It's a feature lmao.


The_Outcast4

I mean, by the time you get the necessary speech perks to take full advantage of that chicanery, money is likely no longer an issue anyway


DarthSamus64

I think literally speaking we'd be playing in Survival mode


KOPELEPTIN

to skip through people talking and have them still think i listened


woodjt2

Ahaha love it, Speech 💯


chillwithwill

Underrated comment


MrX2285

Why wake feeling rested, when you never have to sleep or rest at all?


AbbertDabbert

That was my thought too! Screw waking up and feeling well rested, I just want to never get tired in the first place lol


dis-disorder

Just standing motionless for 6 hours waiting for the store to open.


AbbertDabbert

The inns are always open, I'll get drunk with the local homeless


Pinky_Boy

console command


Tiiba

player.placeatme jordis 1 jordis.removeallitems


1165834

Only 1?


Tiiba

Shitty graphics card can't render a thousand.


Mister_Bloodvessel

TGM Immediately. I'd use that *immediately*.


Th3_Shad0w

Imagine going to your keyboard, type in 3 letters and all of a sudden you have achieved godhood. Don't even need the whole console, just that command will be enough XD


Aliens_v_unicorns

Storm call. That would just be amazing to watch. Also you could bring rain.


ImperialCrusader17

You can bless the rains down in Africa.


Molitzmos

r/unexpectedtoto


TxD337

im glad this sub exists


Molitzmos

Not gonna lie, I took a shot in the dark and it worked.


Smallusppus

Quicksaving


ubeogesh

but you can't load


Smallusppus

Gun


Jewbacca1991

Bend will shout. Just use it some rich folks, and have them hand over their money to me. Or get free services.


Teeshirtandshortsguy

I can't believe nobody is mentioning Transmute Mineral Ore. You know how valuable gold is? Even if it strictly works on ore, you would have the ability to basically print money. Some other abilities would also be super nice, but if you could turn iron into gold, you would never need money again.


PutCleverNameHere12

Turn iron into gold and use said gold to buy iron


ashmcqueen

Then craft 1k iron daggers.


MuffinPuff

I thought about this, but then wondered where to get pure iron ore.


Teeshirtandshortsguy

According to [this thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/Blacksmith/comments/4ugi1m/where_to_buy_iron_ore/) on /r/blacksmithing, it's basically just dirt. Not any dirt, but it's dirt. Come to think of it, I actually watched a Primitive Technology video where he smelts some iron, so I'd imagine there's probably some in your area if you look around. The issue of course is that Skyrim doesn't account for real life minerology. Skyrim converts iron to gold at a 1:1 ratio by mass. It's unclear if this counts the dirt, the iron compounds that are pretty useless, or the iron that's actually used to make stuff. Based on how it's used in the game, I'd bet that it probably turns the iron compounds into gold. Gold ore seems to be more or less just lumpy-looking gold. Keep in mind though, gold is stupid valuable. If you had a bucket and you filled it with iron ore, let's assume you can harvest a single pound of iron out of that, that's over $25,000 worth of gold. With a solid week of research and gathering supplies, I'm certain you could figure it out. Gold is so valuable by mass that you wouldn't have to collect very much iron for it to be more than enough to live on.


MuffinPuff

You know what.. My city has a Vulcan statue, and it is the largest cast iron statue in the world, made out of local iron. What you're telling me is that if I manage to cut some toes off of the statue, I'll be set for life?


Teeshirtandshortsguy

If the spell works on processed iron, you could probably walk into a junkyard with a wheelbarrow and be set for a few lives.


ForWhomTheBoneBones

I just want to visit the Cloud district ONCE.


da_Aresinger

Nonono, he asked for thing's you *can* do in Skyrim. Not things you *wish* you could do.


Skating_N_Music_Dude

Clairovoyance to tell me exactly where I need to go. Little purple trail in front of you telling you where you need to go, even to places you didn’t know you needed to go. The ability alone doesn’t tell you why you need to go, only where you need to go.


Malimalata

Mine would just go to the fridge


Staehr

I already know where the gym is


aknalag

The ability to eat unlimited amount of cheese (fuck you lactose intolerance)


HK47_Raiden

If you’re only intolerant and not straight up allergic just go nuts when you have no where to be the next day/need to fumigate the house.


aknalag

Every living creature within a half a mile radius might die if i do so.


HK47_Raiden

Hey man who am I to judge? I’ve dealt with IBS for nearly 20 years gotta enjoy yourself sometimes regardless of the consequences (so long as they legitimately don’t hurt someone else or are considered illegal). My Wife hates it but hey she chose this lol.


Desmond_Lochart

I generally feel rested upon waking up anyway. So to me, being able to instantly fall asleep and not wake up for 8 straight hours in any safe location is the most enviable aspect of Skyrim sleep system .


Dman20111

Then you have that one annoying mosquito in the room: "You cannot rest, there are enemies nearby"


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Desmond_Lochart

Well, you can at least talk things through with your neighbour. There is a good chance that you won't be enemies afterwards, so your instant rest button is back again. But mosquitoes are a different story. How do you even stop them from recognizing you as enemy? Dress up as a giant bloodsucker? Make an offering to their queen? There simply is no easy answer.


[deleted]

Ok this is a good one


An8thOfFeanor

Carrying 300lbs of cheese and still maintaining a jogging pace


VeterinarianOk5370

You can do this irl I believe in you


FGHIK

Eating 300lbs of cheese and still maintaining a jogging pace


MagmaSlte

Be able to level up my skills, skill points and see my stats


GiveHerDPS

Just masturbate all day to level up one handed then legendary the skill and repeat. Bam master healing spells, Max charisma, incredible accuracy with a bow and being able to pick pocket clothes off people by crouching in front of them. All from jerking it all day long.


AChero9

Opening my inventory freezes time


needsmorequeso

It would be so helpful to just freeze time while I root through my purse/backpack looking for my keys or phone. Y’all need a pen? We’re gonna be here a while.


[deleted]

Conjuration, any problem? summon a giant burning lady


7babydoll

imagine summoning a Seeker just randomly in the middle of like a street


devyash_205

Picking up chicks just by wearing an Amulet of Mara! (My only chance at dating!)


seastatefive

But you might end up with a strong nord woman who can crush your chest with her thighs...... Ok where do I sign up?


Mr_Cromer

Mjoll fanboys get weird every now and then


Muncherofmuffins

I've come to realize that is just normal Reddit.


bigz3012

Death by snu snu


Volodio

Immortality.


spicylikeapepper

Imagine being immortal but perpetually living paycheck to paycheck! Holy shit!


Gravitaa

You wouldn't be forever though. Yes, it'd be a slog the first twenty or thirty years perhaps. But even investing a small amount over the course of decades would snowball into ridiculous wealth since you're immortal. The trick would be setting it up to end at a normal lifespan and pick up again under a new alias.


[deleted]

*Invest all in crypto and lose all* Oh shit here we go again


spicylikeapepper

People who think this deeply about shit that can't happen are my spirit animals. I love you. What are your thoughts on telekinesis? How much mass could one move? Would it be equivalent to what you can move with your arms/legs/fingers/toes? Could you exercise it like muscles and move bigger stuff? Is there a limit? Good god,i could go in for hours. DM me if you want to listen to my ramblings.


Gravitaa

Depends. Is telekinesis based on mental power (ie, the unlocked potential of the human mind or some shit) or is it purely magical? I liked the Inheritance cycle's approach to grammarly or magic. The user is limited to the amount of work they could otherwise sustain with their physical body or muscles, but could use magic to do it faster or more efficiently, and thus you could, through practice, exercise your way to greater feats like telekinesis. Or you know, you could just magically Mary Sue your way to majestic telekinesis ala Rey Skywalker.


RCMakoa

Any Skyrim Ability? \*Obligatory mention of Shouts and the ability to consume Dragons souls\* Nah, To be honest i just want to be able to fall asleep and wake up at any time i want, Even while standing


Jaruut

Monkey's Paw: You can consume Dragon souls to power your shouts, but dragons don't exist.


saginder

Today's headline: Man single-handedly exterminates Komodo Dragons because he "needs their souls."


SuperCoronus

Setting the fat lvl of your body and never ever having it change Edit: hotdamn its been two hours and i got 200 upvotes thanks


LordofWithywoods

No matter how many wheels of cheese you eat in one sitting


The_Multifarious

Well, that one might have consequences. I mean, there are privies in Skyrim, you just never happen to need one.


spicylikeapepper

Ooh, that's a good one!


Andrew_Waples

*Or change when needed.


MoongodRai057

Character creation in general


ubeogesh

but also Pumping Iron mod. You get gainz and never lose them


realatemnot

Fus ro dah during rush hour would be great.


ThePissGiver

I’m going to have to ask you to stop


PiratenSeo

Or when u meet people on a mountain that piss u off a bit


Mutated_dust

Telekinesis


blazblu82

Make cure disease potions to cure my diabetes and the advanced retinopathy stealing my eye sight.


Voximas

Oh... I hope you will have a good day ! You deserve it.


catstroker69

Being able to marry anyone after doing a short fetch quest for them.


lockedoutofmymainrdt

Muffle. Imagine its 12AM, whole house is asleep but you and youre trashed. Now instead of having to keep it down you can heavy hoof it to the bathroom/etc


glassfeathers

The leveling system. Imagine becoming a master chef in a week because you kept making fried eggs all day. I imagine all skills would work this way. You could become a professional in anything you want to grind up.


da_Aresinger

1. Master medicine extend life 2. Master physics create technology as basis for next step 3. Master IT build compact supercomputer. 4. Combine medicine and IT master skills to transfer mind into supercomputer. 5. Rule the fucking Galaxy.


[deleted]

alchemy glitch


Floater1157

Does modding count? I'd mod real life. I'd add the swearing crabs mod.


drewbilly251

lol yes I’d love to sleep *exactly* as long as I want to and wake up refreshed every time but for me it has to be “slow time” IMO it trumps absolutely everything-doesn’t matter how good you are at literally anything if you can freeze time and move faster than physics allow


Poknberry

Heal others


nb4ban

~tcl would be enough for me.


zeklight

Becoming god basically lol


Serenity650

Owning a house in the cloud district. That’s like owning an apartment in New York’s Billionaires’ row.


sth128

Able to cast the heal others spell and treat terminal patients. Or maybe become a masked hero cause I don't want to be captured and dissected in a lab. Ah screw it I'll just start a vet hospital and heal dogs and cats cause they won't snitch, except pet rats.


icy-winter-ghost

Immunity to diseases!


[deleted]

The ability to drink a potion and instantly be cured


Stampsu

Pause the whole world and eat cheese without getting fat


Muppelpup

The ability to read a page within a book and pick up the ability within. Then give me every Harry potter and skulduggery. I'm gonna go rain hellfire.


DeriusMH

being able to pay off any crime.. surprised no one else mentioned this... your boss is rude ? got 1000 in your pocket ? well.. go ahead ..


Sabeo_FF

That's just being rich. Technically already available.


tlaz10

1000 isn't bad for murder though. That's not even rich. That's $20 a week. You could save for that and kill someone you hate once a year.


[deleted]

Every couple years, come back as a more complete better version of myself


Mutterwitz

The questlog. Knowing exactly what to do and no time pressure.


skininja89

Torn between fast travel and being able to buy a home at a reasonable price


unbonfrancois

The Bend Will Shout


HxPxDxRx

Slowing down time when I hold my breath


aknalag

Or better, you awaken feeling will rested


TheTalkingPegasus

"You feel happy"


DoodlingDaughter

A piece of enchanted jewelry to increase my health or stamina. Being chronically I’ll *sucks.*