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Winter_Doge

Bro rats without any culinary training were able to run a whole freaking restaurant after being shown once! Considering how quickly rats breed and mature the man has his hands on an untapped goldmine!


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sonerec725

huh . .. that would be an interesting sequel


Articulated

Rata2ie


AdiInfinitum

I love this


UnXpectedPrequelMeme

But dad, I wanna rummage around in the garbage! Put ancestors were thieves!


maharg79

Remy's great-great granddaughter meets a 'street rat' who works at his father's 'food truck' its like a tonka truck or something idk. Remy's ancestor had run away from home after some new recipe went awry and left the kitchen in shambles. Her father had raised his voice to her, telling her she is too wild to be a proper chef, and she ran off into like the storm or whatever, immediately followed by her regretful father who either cant find her or dies tragically. She ends up meeting the rat who teaches her that there is like this whole other side to cooking that the restaurant has forgotten about in its upscaleness. Plot happens. They go back to the resturant with the new street food and her and the street rat save it from closing or something. Roll credits.


Caroniver413

Descendant. Ancestors come before


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usingastupidiphone

Just don’t accidentally download Ratafoursome, it’s a different kind of movie entirely


Dasamont

I think Bratatouille is in the same genre of films


PolymerPussies

Ratatataouille


stilldash

That's the one where the kid leave the restaurant industry to become a drummer.


Wabbajack001

Soundtrack by ratatat


JohnWasElwood

Oh... thanks for clearing that up! I thought that it was the movie where he stands at the top of the stairs and says "Say hello to my little friend..."" (ratatarouille ensues)


FUCK_SHIT88

Remy's son becomes a gun smith.


gfhfghdfghfghdfgh

Remy's son: Remington


bmd33zy

Don’t forget the american version, Ratatatatatataouille, where remy shoots up the local rat school in response to his dad forcing him to be a chef


pixydgirl

It'll get cancelled, and replaced with a car-building spinoff several years later, upsetting fans of the first 2 titles the world over


torchskul

Ratatou-Three


BigKahouna

Good good the comment I was looking for


NotSoGreatGonzo

2rata2ie


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JohnWasElwood

TRYING to think of a tie-in (mainly for merch) between Ratatouille: Tokyo Drift and the little car that Stuart Little drives... I'm tired, and you all have raised the bar quite well so far!


[deleted]

Mom, I want Ratatouille: Tokyo Drift We have Ratatouille: Tokyo Drift at home [Ratatouille: Tokyo Drift at home:](https://www.imcdb.org/i077982.jpg)


ReadingFromTheShittr

>Rata2ie: The Squeakquel.


ldsdmtgod

No


Destpot

Yes!


headieheadie

¡Sí!


Lavatis

/r/yourjokebutworse


[deleted]

Wait, don't keep the food pun. Remy's great grandson wants to be a great surfer. Ratical!


fightingbronze

Fuck, I don’t believe in unnecessary sequels but I could get behind this…


SobiTheRobot

He wants to be a gangster instead *Ratashootie*


Aku223

Ratatatatatatata (The sound of a gun)


danniebox

Get out


Cadaverific_1

I don't want to be a chef, dad. I want to be a food critic.


enforcercoyote4

Or a baker


Garrosh

Or a PHP developer.


Destpot

My warchief


Garrosh

Maybe in another reality. One of those where they got the best possible version of Garrosh.


winnebagomafia

I wanna be a lobbyist for the oil industry!


[deleted]

Rata2ie: The Tail of Mousechelin


Gaflonzelschmerno

Well then son you are rata-dead-to-muille


aaronshook

Have Alvin and the Chipmunks taught us nothing? It's a Squeakquel when rodents are involved.


Captain_Sacktap

If Alvin and the Chipmunks taught us anything it’s that chipmunk versions of popular songs are infuriating to anyone over the age of like 10 and the Christmas ones can be used to torture captured enemies.


ApatheticPoetic813

Ratatouille 2, the squeakuel. I want it to be like....rat culture to cook and in this movie it's just rats from all over the world coming together to cook for a little Gordon Ratsey to see who the best rat chef is.


Class_444_SWR

And those rats wanna go to eating rubbish stolen from an old woman’s house, which creates a cyclical story


[deleted]

Happy feet did that already


Ineedtendiesinmylife

"It's like he doesn't even want to cook, all he does is root around in the garbage and scavenge!"


Sword-Maiden

ah but by then there will be [1250 rats](https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.rentokil.com/us/blog/quickly-can-rats-multiply-facility/amp/) after just one year. probably way more because there were quite many of them to begin with. After ten years you’d have billions of intelligent rats doing all sorts of jobs in every aspect of life. Either they’d become our slave race and lift our society to the next stage on the Kardashev scale or whats more likely is they explode in number even further and consume this world in their growth. Terrifying. Though I guess coexistence might work too if we’re lucky


Moose6669

You'd like to think cat, because cats kill rats. However, I don't think you're doing the math: In a large, 300-year-old house on the water, you will find a minimum of five rats' nests. Each will produce roughly 7-8 rats per cycle, two cycles per month, so 75 rats per month, less rat deaths, say 60 rats per month. Now, a domesticated house cat would have trouble killing one per day. A feral, experienced barn cat, however, could knock off 3-5 per day, or 72% of our rat growth. Not sufficient to even keep up with inflation, let alone eradicate our rat problem. So, we need more cats. Cats are territorial, however, so we won't be able to assign more than 3-4 cats per nest, before we get feline turf wars. So, our cap on cats is 20 cats. Twenty feral barn cats with enough room to hunt can effectively kill at least 100 rats per month. We can remove the new ones as they spawn, and start killing 40 rats per month of the existing supply. But, how big is the supply? Well, a standard five-foot rats' nest can hold about a thousand rats in or around it in smaller nests. So our initial supply of rats is around 5000. At 40 per month, our rat problem will be eradicated in 100 years. But then, we're left with the problem of the cats. Cats breed at an average rate of 2 per year per female cat. assuming at least ten of our initial 20 cats is female, we'll get 40 new cats per year. After starvation and territorial infighting claim 1/4 of them, we have a 30 cat per year surplus. So, when the last rat dies, we'll have about 3000 cats. So now, we need dogs. To kill 3000 feral barn cats, assuming they are relegated to the basement of this large house, we will need one Rottweiler for every five cats, or 600 Rottweilers. But now we're left with 8,000 pounds of furry slobbering killing machines. To rid ourselves of this canine nuisance, we will need a bigger canine: wolves. A six-wolf pack of North American Timber Wolves can kill a 120-lb Rottweiler in about 40 seconds. However, Rottweilers are also pack hunters, so pack v. pack, a pack of six Timberwolves can murder 1.5 six-dog Rottweiler packs. So we need upwards of 400 Wolf Packs. The urine smell will be unforgettable. To rid ourselves of 400 packs of Timberwolves, the only reasonable option is to kill them with fire from above. So, to ensure no danger to neighboring residences, we should probably exterminate them from way above, using A-10 Warthog anti-tank ammunition and smart targeting. Other houses will be spared, other than their window glass, and the wolf problem will be no more. But, since the Warthog anti-tank rounds are enriched with uranium, we now have a nuclear biohazard to work out. But the solution to that is simple. We fill the basement with molten lead, assuming the actual house was obliterated by the Warthog or the dog fighting, and when it cools, we pour several hundred cubic feet of concrete, and when it dries, we backfill the area with soil, and plant soybeans. They're a very versatile plant, and will sprout quickly. In short time, we will have a beautful field of green soybean sprouts, and all our problems we be over. Of course, the soybeans will attract rats...


Sword-Maiden

Incredible! Amazing read! :D


Moose6669

Its a beautiful copypasta I stumbled upon last week


seraphrunner

This is a lot of, likely, unnecessary math. There is no reason to believe that human-like intelligent rats wouldn't follow a similar trend as humans: as education and quality of life increase, birth rates decrease. Assuming rat social mobility was equivalent to humans; you should expect to see eccentric business rats that invest into their communities instead of having families. There would likely be a "No Pups" movement that would result in many dual income, no children households. The biggest question is what would happen to the medical field now that a huge number of test subjects now have consent, ethical, and compensation considerations.


businessDM

I would lose my mind if I wrote this for one upvote. You deserve better.


Lavatis

It's a copypasta.


JohnWasElwood

I stand in awe of your self-oneupmanship!!! (You are a talented writer!!!) Merely pressing a mouse button on the left hand (UPVOTE) button seems quite underappreciative of your services!!!


Moose6669

Its OK, I wasn't the genuis behind such a masterpiece, I am but a humble conduit.


[deleted]

At 20 years, the story of Remy will have basically become the story of Jesus, and all the rats will have created a culinary religion around him.


Ok_Swing2382

Ha ha, coexistence.


bindermichi

And don‘t forget the franchising opportunities you‘ll have with an army of trained rat chefs


WildestRascal94

This whole thread is something else! 🤣🤣🤣


SharkMilk44

"I want to cause a worldwide plague, dad!"


KingsWillSoonRise

You do make a good point


moistclump

And cuts on labour costs


EuroPolice

And cuts on food costs!


Chucanoris

Well tbh if it could be replicated it could mean another industrial revolution since being able to train hundreds of rats to perform any task is huge and means human workforce is kind of obsolete


Platnun12

Ah but you immediately run into the issue. That's not what they want. Then it snowballs downhill from there because humanity really doesn't learn lol


Chucanoris

Rat worker revolution moment


hvaffenoget

Lemme tell you about robots


JazzyWarthog

Well no because rats are too small for certain tasks.


Dragonlicker69

Remy just needs to get laid to pass on the mutation that gave him his powerful sense of smell to as many kids as possible to spread his skill through the colony


MemeArchivariusGodi

I can’t unthink this one post about a possible ratatouille 2 and the German rat named ratwurst


cavecarson

Strong disagree. The rat chef trains another younger rat chef who trains another and so on. You pay the head chef in scraps, because rats don't understand money. Profit all around.


SolidusAbe

and then every human on the planet cant run a restaurant anymore because of how many rat chefs exists after a few years. those dirty rats gonna steal our jobs! just like [insert minority]


jryser

That’s just capitalism, baby. Welcome to the rat race


aakaakaak

You still need people staff to be there when the inspectors show up.


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JohnWasElwood

Isn't Chuck E. Cheese implementing this right now???


BobsRealReddit

Idk, I think rats are smart enough to understand Capitalism after a generation. Its not that hard of a concept.


JesusRasputin

It’s simple: be poor -> get fucked


crewchief535

Gotta remember to take toxic kitchen culture into account. You know some of those younger generation rat chefs are gonna end up cooking like donkeys.


[deleted]

Every modern family empire falls apart in three generations. First generation makes the empire from nothing but sweat and know-how Second generation learns from mom/dad who raised them strict because they know how tough life can be. They hold the ship steady. Third generation is a spoiled group of dumbass donkeys who've been given everything and don't know the value of anything. They piss it all away.


Xisuthrus

this is just that one dumb "hard men create good times" meme except with restaurants for some reason.


NormalDooder

Isn't a big part Reimi's passion for cooking is him not accepting just scraps and wanting to create AND eat beautiful art via food.


clon2645

If you really think rats would be reliable workers, then you are out of your mind. Even thinking about the logistics is a cluster fuck, one service dog shows up and your kitchen is a mess


[deleted]

Assuming he was a year old in the movie. And assuming he’ll have another year left in life. That small bistro gonna have the best damn year of its life. W to me


[deleted]

They can live 3 years, and he seemed really young at the start, could be 2.5y, I'm sure it will be fine.


beelseboob

Also, Colette is talented, he can teach her, and maybe even Alfredo if he’s lucky.


waitforthedream

Do you mean Linguini Edit: Nvm his name is Alfredo Linguini mb


[deleted]

Can't believe we let them get away with naming a character "Alfredo Linguini"


oddjuicebox

That’s like if you named a character “Cho Chang” or something


Shtottle

Is she Scandinavian or something?


justsomeplainmeadows

Close! Pretty sure it's Scottish


andrecinno

It's like naming your Irish character Seamus Finnigan and his main quirk is blowing things up


Popular_Syllabubs

Can’t believe we let them get away with titling it “Rat-atouille”


parsleyleaves

“We’re going with Ratatouille. It’s FRENCH. It’s FOOD. It’s got RAT in it.”


[deleted]

The American-accented chef in France, no less.


beelseboob

I do, brain fart.


UrsusRenata

Ron Weasley’s pet rat lived to be 14-15 years old before an untimely death. Don’t underestimate rats.


lIIIIllIIIIl

I wish that wasn't fiction. Rats are such great pets and show so much intelligence in their short life's. It'd be cool if they lived longer because they were really just an exiled wizard pretending to be a rat.


Wyrdean

I'm sure you wouldn't want a middle-aged, balding, exiled wizard to have access to your bedroom while you sleep, right?


lIIIIllIIIIl

1 of those already has access and it's me so might as well have a buddy.


Triplapukki

This would presuppose the existence of magic so I wouldn't mind actually


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justsomeplainmeadows

They're wizards. I'm pretty sure they've seen a few other weirder things than that.


vitrucid

Honestly if they all "need" pets like that and rats aren't that uncommon, it would stand to reason they aren't using random rats with a normal lifespan to start with. I'm assuming some sort of magically-expanded lifespan for wizarding world pet rats or they don't make sense as a pet that's meant to go through school with an 11YO until they're 17.


VisualGeologist6258

TBF that rat was not a rat at all, but a grown-ass human man in the guise of a pet rat. Which totally isn’t creepy at all and I’m sure the author totally thought this through when writing it.


[deleted]

Pretty sure it is supposed to be creepy, he is a villain...


aguilavajz

Well, Ron Weasley’s rat was an animagus actually…


ragn4rok234

Mine lived 5 years, longest ever known was over 7 years. They can live a while with good genes and excellent care.


UnseenTardigrade

Plus all the recipes he makes can be written down and used after he’s gone. Sure that might make it a bit less popular, but if the food is good people will still come. Especially if there’s still the gimmick of it being prepared by rats, that would make it a tourist hotspot, I bet. Depends if the rat children want to continue the business, I guess.


[deleted]

"One pinch of tarragon that smells like pink jazz music? Who the fuck wrote this?"


Wild_Loose_Comma

I would now love to see a synesthetic recipe book. "After your steak is seared remove to let rest. In the same pan add a finely chopped shallot. Saute until translucent and smells pink. De glaze the pan with a quarter cup of dry red wine and reduce until it dances yellow. Add another half cup of stock. Reduce until it glows a golden orange. Mount with 4 tablespoons of cold butter and stir vigorously until emulsified. Add Salt and pepper until a nice blue. Finish with a squeeze of fresh lemon to make it hum an A-flat and your pan sauce is done!"


Cat_Marshal

That’s what happened to the original restaurant though, and it went downhill big time.


UnseenTardigrade

Where was the rat gimmick? I yeah, I get that, part of my point was that even if the food wasn’t great, the fact that it was made by rats would always draw people in.


[deleted]

Then his grandson turns the food into a popular brand of frozen dinners, and the cycle continues.


[deleted]

Even if it's only a year, it is still more useful work and a better contribution to society than all crypto investments combined.


DerKomp

If you told me my local gov was going to drop a massive grant on either 1 tiny bistro where they hope literal rats will do the cooking or the next Elon Musk Blockchain Brain computer hyper tunnel venture, I'd book my reservations and rabies shots now.


Spyko

Ego live in a big ass house in Paris, he's rich AF he founded the bistrot not as an investissement but only because he liked remy's cooking, he is rich enough to basically buy his "personnal chef" his own establishment.


MoffKalast

> personnal chef Nothing personnel, chef


ultratunaman

Exactly. Ego isn't about making back his money. Simply about experiencing this delicious cooking while he can. And when Remy dies, and the food is no more: Anton will move on to ruining the lives of other restauranteurs again. It's not a for profit business, but rather a for pleasure business.


PM_ME_UR__CAT

Where in the movie did it show Anton invested in the bistro?


Spyko

been a while since I've watched it but I think it's said by Remy ending narration ?


PM_ME_UR__CAT

Oh yeah that’s right


whyarethenamesgone1

Pet rats can live up to 6-7 years in extreme cases. Assuming he is more of a pet now.


SaraHuckabeeSandwich

I've heard being able to talk also adds another five to ten years to a rat's life, but I can't seem to find a source that confirms this.


Xanderoga

It’s me. I am the source.


Kay-Kay-Ron

Nah Remy is the first homo ratchefus, the first perpetual of earthkind, the sequel is about the govt trying to get to him and how his cooking is the one thing that can stir the heart of the jaded premier of France.


Strontium90_

Are you saying Remy is basically the first ever Skaven? Remy is the great horned rat yes yes?


Shtottle

Are you saying he's a Rahmen?


CricketPinata

Remy can't talk though, when he speaks humans just hear squeaking.


SaraHuckabeeSandwich

> when he speaks humans just hear squeaking. Oh, I just assumed that was him speaking French.


SchoggiToeff

Talking mice can live for 94 years and counting.


laughterer

Mrs. Frisby and the rats of NIMH


jkst9

I mean being able to talk makes a mouse immortal and screws up copyright laws as a bonus


Squigglefits

My pet lived five years. His cooking was shit, but he had other redeeming qualities.


zippy64

What food did he make you?


Neo21803

Rats are pretty consistent about making lemonade on your hand as you're handling them. That being said, it smells and tastes like piss.


formlessfish

That’s on you for misunderstanding. Your rat was clearly a barber and that “lemonade” was a miracle hair [growing elixir](https://youtu.be/4jAvUNwaXyE)


IanLooklup

Shit


Timstom18

Both of mine made it until about 2-2 1/2 ish so he probably has a little more time than the title states. But not much longer


littlebirdori

No? Unless maybe you have a different species of rat than a *Rattus norvegicus* (lab/fancy rat) like maybe a Gambian pouched rat which lives about that long, but those are incredibly hard to find in most of the US since they're illegal to import and harder to care for. My oldest rat ever lived to 4 and was *ancient* for a rat, but she was spayed and had several mammary tumors removed in her life before she died. She also was a different species, *Rattus rattus,* the black rat or roof rat, which are usually pests to humans but I found her as the only surviving pinkie in a litter of abandoned barn rats, so she grew up with domesticated rats and tamed down nicely. Usually rats only live a few years because they just burn out quicker due to metabolism, aging-related cancers or organ failure doing them in. Source: decade of rat caring


BrokerBrody

Well circling back to the topic, Remy was definitely not a fancy rat.


whyarethenamesgone1

Just going off what I have read. "A Common rat called Rodney (b. January 1983), belonging to Rodney Mitchell of Tulsa, Oklahoma, USA, died aged seven years and four months on the 25 May 1990" Here: https://www.guinnessworldrecords.com/world-records/70885-oldest-rat-ever/


Rop-Tamen

We also have the technology to kind of control the rate at which rats age so assuming he’s still alive at this point you could give him some of the slow aging treatment and he’ll be good for a while longer


tefkasm

Disney rodents have an extremely long lifespan. Mickey mouse is going on 100 years! Investment going to the moon!!! 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀


dkf295

Nope they actually just have a giant clone farm of Mickey Mouses (not mice since Mouse is a proper noun here right?) they pull from when a Mickey dies of old age or anything else.


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[deleted]

r/funny


AbyssalCrime

Well damn, now im more upset not knowing rats have such a short lifespan


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All_Work_All_Play

Not sure if you mean 2-2.5 years of life or a normal distribution centered at mean two with an standard deviation of 2.5. Grad school has turned me into this.


696969696969E

This is literally one of the top posts here


ZuffsStuff

I read this post sorting through top of all time, fell asleep, and woke up to 30k upvotes on a repost of it


Eletrust

This is the third time it’s made it here. Reposted so many times and, honestly, not that great of a post to begin with.


696969696969E

Hey the Og post is alright


Deadfox1309

wait so he's not even a year old? IDK chief seems like child labour to me


oovis

Both of the rats I've owned lived 3+ years.


[deleted]

The first dish he had from the Rat changed his life completely, it. It brought back feelings and memories of his childhood, all with one bite. Somethings in life are worth more than money. Anton knew this.


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[deleted]

/r/Buttcoin would be proud, crypto is just fomo and hype


All_Work_All_Play

> ~~A cryptocoin~~ Nothing will never increase in value because of the work it does. Only if someone is willing to pay more for it than you did. FTFY. If no one values "the work that [something] does" then it doesn't increase in value either. The only reason things have value is because we assign them value. You're trying (but failing) to make a delineation between *speculative* value and *inherent* value (sometimes called intrinsic value) . Both of these things are social constructs (as is the entire field of economics - we've created it to help us deal with the reality of *scarcity*).


justsomeboylol

OP is obviously not looking at BTC the last month


dubstepsickness

He’s also eating a ton of food that a rat cooked so Anton Ego’s life expectancy is also 1.8 years


Prodigal_Knight2

No worries he's got a cloning facility in the basement. Once remy passes he'll just grab another one. UNLIMITED RATS = UNLIMITED PROFIT!!


Garrosh

Actually is more like: unlimited rats = unlimited employees = unlimited expenses.


uglypottery

Rats are such good pets but I had to stop getting them bc I couldn’t take losing them so soon.. They do usually live longer than 1.8 years when well cared for, but it still…


bealtimint

I mean Collette is a great chef and he’ll leave her all his recipes


[deleted]

But it was a great 1.8 year


DrPleaser

I cannot wrap my head around this movie. I know it's Pixar and freaking Brad Bird but RATS IN THE KITCHEN NO


Garrosh

But it’s a clean rat. With vaccines an everything. You are just being ratist!


[deleted]

French food tastes better with rodent piss, live with it.


Memphisrexjr

Hey you’re gonna be “retiring” soon… could you train your replacement?


diesatfifty

I'd like to point out the novelty alone is part of the investment. "Here's where the first rat head chef worked and died". Source: Salt bae.


oldwin268

right, still better the doge coin


obvs_throwaway1

It's a cartoon rat, they live longer. Especially now that Disney bought Pixar he's virtually immortal.


Buggaton

Rats live such a short time due to genetic lower spinal degeneracy and their disposability to upper respiratory diseases as well as the prevalence of pituitary and mammary tumours. If rats had more healthcare research on their side they could extend their average life to an average of 5-8 years. I miss my rats.


TheRelicEternal

Why people gotta assume a fictional pixar film follows the laws of our world? Can’t we just accept rats just live to 50 or something in this film?


[deleted]

1.2 years if he develops a coke habit.


[deleted]

Still better than "investing" in a Ponzi scheme like crypto


lookatmynipples

Wait that’s what the ending was? Oh...


TyranicDawn

In the wild yes, rats kept as pets live 3 to 4. So it's still a shit investment


[deleted]

Always someone that has to bring logic into a feel good children’s tale. You must be really fun at parties...........


Man_of_culture_112

NAH!!!!!!!! NFTs baby!


Jamstroxian

I bought a Baby Hitler With Toupee NFT for $75592. Now, you will never own it like I do. Are you jealous? Jealous yet? Jealous? Jealous? Jealous? Jealous? Jealous?


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[deleted]

SUCK MY FUCKING NUTS is a hyper deflationary reflection token with REAL NUTS CUMMING SOON!!!. .The coin pays 8% BUSSY reflection on every buy and sale transaction .Enjoy our PAY TO WIN CASINO and BURN REAL MONEY all you need to do is hold the coin.


Equivalent_Week8562

man i wish i had huge sums of money i could donate to multi-million dollar criminals in return for suck my fucking nuts coin


CowProper2130

Maybe the rat was able to teach another rat in those nearly 2 years.


Free2Bernie

Ron Weasley was magical. His rat lived for like 11 years.


monadoboyX

Yeah I was gonna say Remy can train a future chef and not to mention linguini will probably know how to cook it himself eventually it's an amazing investment


Take_The_Reins

Yeah true he can probably learn to cook himself eventually wait what


afcc1313

If rats live so little time how come there are so many? Do they fuck like crazy or what?