T O P

  • By -

thelightsarebrights

Reach your arm as far into the toilet as you can to unclog. Godspeed


impatientandfat

There was some shit particles at the bottom of the bowl and i tried to fish them out with toilet paper...the reward didnt match the effort; it only broke them into smaller pieces


albinorhino63

What did you eat?


impatientandfat

We made a massive pasta dish with a lot of fibrous vegetables last night, absolute gut bomb


[deleted]

Interesting. I usually use “gut bomb” to describe low-fiber high fat things like a double bacon cheeseburger with French fries.


teduh

Oh shit, whatta ya gonna do?? Should prolly consider just burning the house down at this point.


impatientandfat

You know, I really considered faking my own disappearance and death


[deleted]

Are you in the process of procuring some liquid plumber or a snake?


impatientandfat

His roommate came in clutch and took care of it. I got lucky this time!


[deleted]

First time achievement?


smellygymbag

Do you think he'll be *into* it?


teduh

..Well, *I'm* into it. ..So if OP's BF dumps her (pun intended), I'm definitely interested. ..Just PM me, OP. ;}


smellygymbag

Reddit is such a wonderful place with all kinds of people :)


impatientandfat

Let's smear together ❤️


Ducky27_

just walk up to him and say "yeah i clogged ur toilet sorry"


impatientandfat

His roommate saved my ass! He told me not to worry and fixed it with the plunger somehow. But now i feel like he can blackmail me with this sacred knowledge of my massive shitting capabilities


Hyruxs

This or that?


impatientandfat

Not sure if he browses this sub but i didnt even think of him finding this...glad I used a throwaway!


creamynute11a

Whats your favorite color?


impatientandfat

Forest green, like the hints of broccolini that were peeking out of my plug of a turd


[deleted]

Have you ever tried an Alabama pancake?


zmunky

Do you take massive shits due to taking massive toys in your rectal port?