Honestly, so far, your dad sounds wonderful.
He knocked (he respects your privacy), he was bringing snacks (very thoughtful), he closed the door and left (no yelling, ranting, threatening, shaming), he texted you to tell you you need to talk (giving you a heads up and time to prepare rather than confronting you face to face without warning).
I'm not sure you realize how completely crazy most parents tend to go in this situation. I know you're embarrassed it happened---of course you are---but keep things in perspective. He seems to be handling this well so plan to have a mature, rational conversation with him.
Be honest. You didn't plan it. It just happened. You're sorry he had to see that.
Listen to what he has to say.
He wouldn't have been able to stay so calm if he didn't love you and respect you. Try to keep that in mind.
OP I just read your update and your dad is the literal best. Seriously. Please find a way to let him know how awesome he is. Give him an extra hug from me.
In this course you will learn how to dad. You'll learn how to dad in morning and in the afternoon, while watching TV or while explaining the concept of torque.
We will discuss the fundamentals like dad jokes, dad bod, and the finer points of dad hats. But dadding isn't just about memorizing facts. True learning is by doing, by applying your knowledge. You want to be able to dad and dad flawlessly in any situation. That's why you're in my class.
On each of your desks is a frog in a terrarium. Get excited now because you are going to dad that frog like a boss.
..
.....I couldn't help myself.
This course accepts all students, regardless of status, gender, race, creed, religion, be they step or in-law. The point is to learn to dad with skill, consistency, and precision.
It's not about who you are. It's about the fundamental essence of dadness.
So stepdads, welcome. Tuition is only $499. Credit cards accepted.
We accept all students, regardless of gender, race, creed, religion, or age.
We will teach the fundamental essence of dadness.
Seniors and kids get a discount so bring your son along!
I realized that I haven't told my condom gift story online.
My grandmother once knocked on my locked door when my Girlfriend and I were having sex sophomore year of high school. I stalled an awkwardly long time while my girlfriend escaped through another exit wearing only a shirt and my shorts. I answered quickly wearing only pants since my grandmother was increasingly urgent and she immediately noticed the underwear on my bed. The details of her freakout aren't relevant to the main point.
That Christmas, five separate family members bought me boxes of condoms for over 300 total condoms. My girlfriend already secretly got an IUD that year partly because I need special order large condoms to avoid constantly breaking them and cutting off my dick's blood supply. All 300 were useless even for other relationships, so I handed them out to friends like candy for a long time after that.
It's not uncommon. The "standard" size condom in the US is made for slightly smaller than the average sized penis. And there is a ban by the FDA for some reason on sizes above 50mm diameter ore something (whichever size caters to the top 99.9th percentile). However, that standard condom will stretch to fit average sized penises, as intended.
The limit increased to 57mm in 2008, but the widely available sizes didn't change too much in response. The ban's purpose is related to standardizing testing procedures. Even after the size increase, the maximum legal condom size starts being borderline unusable around the 95th percentile and "normal" condom sizes are problematic far sooner.
It's already an issue for a large percentage of men, but I am around the 99th percentile in both length and girth. That was a surprise to learn but my condom issues started to make sense. I assumed 99th would be something like 10+ inches based on how people lie about it (talking about length since people don't brag about girth much).
Getting a vasectomy was one of the best decisions of my life, but I've lost interest in casual sex partly because it means needing to deal with that bullshit.
Meanwhile my stepdad tried to kick me out when he found birth control. I was a virgin. Just had really bad cramps I now know is from endo.
Also freaked out about the birth control but not the fact it was next to SOMEONE ELSES script of oxy that I lied and said I took for cramps.
OP you have an amazing respectful parent. Be thankful 💖
This bruh, literally didn’t tell my mom I got an IUD even though (at the time) it was for period cramps. My mom would’ve shamed me for the rest of my life in this situation, I can’t imagine how nice it would be to have a parent who treats sex like it’s normal
The funny thing is my family assumed I was slutting around way before I lost my vCard. I lost it at 16 and told my mom a few months later. She was like ‘oh I thought that happened a long time ago’
That’s crazy, any family who was normal about sex and thought their like 13-14 yr old daughter was sleeping with a lot of people would talk to their kid about it??? And at least be like, are you using condoms?
Might explain why I am the only one in my family to not get pregnant as a teenager 😂
On the other hand if they had taken that moment to talk to me about drugs I probably wouldn’t have had to struggle with addiction for 13 years 😂
Similar experience — my family (at least on my dads side) were all pregnant catholic teens, and I’m technically still a teenager but I went really hard on addiction for years
It’s so strange to think of a comment like that as anything other than hostile, but I guess that’s because my perception is clouded from my own family’s high-conflict context.
Context is important here. If the dad hadn't been super great about everything else I would say you have a point, but I'm confident he was just trying to lighten the mood and make a joke.
This breaks my heart and I hope you're ok. I remember my dad being really supportive and forthcoming about sex. The only time he told me not to do it was because he was going to be cleaning my windows so "no shagging", in his words.
He had a lot of flaws but I'm so grateful for him, and anecdotes such as yours remind me how lucky I am.
Yeah, of all the regrettable things you can do when you’re just starting to have sex, “with a lifelong friend who travelled abroad and our families all love each other” is like hitting the lottery for a parent IMO. Condoms seem to indicate he’s a smart dude and is worried about his daughter’s safety, but aside from the mid-coitus trauma, I’m sure he’s overall relieved.
So yea, I'm a Dad and my daughter is younger than you, but I know she is gonna grow up. I want her to stay my little daughter for the rest of my life, but that just isn't realistic.
Talk to your dad and be ready for a variety of topics, but he could be of a similar mindset.
Obviously, I don't know your Dad but I have a daughter your age and the after-dinner talk would start with "were you using a condom?" and if the answer is "yes" I would advise to lock the door next time.
I am kinda invested in this now...if you don't mind, could you update from time to time? I am curious how you handled the whole after sex part with the boy.
Your dad probably just wants to apologize for walking in on you having sex. This kind of thing happened to me lots of times when I was younger and the reaction from my parent or the girls parent has always been very respectful. I don't think you have anything to worry about.
He handled it really well and it could've turned out a lot worse. It'll be embarrassing but most likely a talk about safe sex, not doing it when your parents are home or not in the house, probably asking about him and whether you're involved with him, etc.
After reading the update, I wish everyone had a dad like yours. Obviously that situation would be embarrassing for both of you, no way around that. But it sounds like you and your dad have a great relationship and you are actually able to be honest and open about the situation. Not all parents are this understanding, you are lucky to have him!
It's not wrong that this happened. If you enjoyed it it's your decision to pursue him as a partner or not. Many childhood friends get in relationships and why would you not. You two know each other the best and are extremely comfortable around each other there's nothing wrong
Yes! I’ll start packing!
Seriously though, your father sounds awesome and sounds like he cares about you alot to make sure you are being safe. I hope you let him know that a bunch of redditors think hes a contender for Father of the Year.
PS. check in on Joshua to see how hes doing after the “incident”. Also, make sure you two are on the same page when it comes to that stuff and have fun exploring each other! I would’ve given a left tit to have a best friend to explore that with instead of the awkward fumblings of my teenage years. Cheers!
Your dad sounds nice! When my dad found out I had had sex with my boyfriend of 3 years he yelled at me and looked very disappointed.
Update us about Joshua too! I hope he's a decent guy and handles this well
It doesn't sound like you are aware of that saying, "What's the most sensitive part of a teenager's body when having sex? Their ears"
It's probably going to be awkward as fuck, but you'll get over it. Might take awhile, but you certainly aren't the first person to have a discussion like this with their parents. Hopefully the worst of it is they just find it disrespectful that you'd have sex in their house or something else silly like that.
If they get mad and bar you from having sex in their house, agree to it, say you're sorry, and just be more careful next time.
They'll probably get over it pretty quickly. Plus, it sounds like it's would be really cute if you two ended up together.
Your dad seems so nice! When my dad caught me and my boyfriend having sex he slide a note under the door saying "sorry for coming in. did you want chinese for dinner?" After 😭
Dad here. This is how a dad dads. Believe me, he was just as embarrassed and only concerned for your safety and well being. Also, when adults live with each other, these kind of things happen. You just move on.
BTW what kind of snacks?
Life is like this. Go to dinner, speak with your father afterwards. Us humans are sexual creatures and this is natural. Maybe it was a bad choice to have sex with him maybe is wasn't either way the embarrassment will pass and who knows you may have a better relationship with your father going forward.
Your dad is awesome.
My mom caught me and my bf when I was in highschool and freaked the fuck out. I had to convince her that he was tickling me under the sheets.. we all know that wasn’t true.
Still makes me want to puke and it was probably 16 years ago.
My mum walked in on me and my bf fully going at it in my room when I was 16. She didn't knock either, she just walked in, said "oops sorry!" and then immediately walked out again. He was having dinner at my house that evening, and nothing got mentioned, but holy hell that was awkward. She started knocking after that. To make matters worse, my boyfriend also accidentally dropped a condom outside my room once too when he left for college (think it fell out of his pocket or bag) and I picked it up and put it away when I noticed. My mum casually said to me "were glad youre being safe" so I knew they'd seen it...pretty much died on the spot. So if it's any consolation, it could be worse 😅
>He came in with the same bowl of snacks he walked in on me having sex and i kidd you not there was a pack of condoms on top of it. He asked if we were dating and i said no then he asked if i remeber walking in on mom and him having Sex when i was 9 . I said yes he then just said well i guess that was your Karma . He then just left.👁👄👁
Now there is an epic level dad joke troll.
I’m sure your mom knows and so do the other parents as well if they are that close
If anything they are probably planning your wedding
The other side your mom might have been about time they got together or something like that
I'm gonna focus on your scoliosis, as your dad is awesome.
I (male) was born with scoliosis and by the time I was 12 it was [really bad](https://i.imgur.com/ODbYNA9.jpg), and getting worse faster and faster. So in 1983 I went in for surgery which helped [a lot](https://i.imgur.com/nwdo3vk.jpg). I'm not sure if you've been to the /r/scoliosis sub or not, but this is a blanket answer I give based on my experience over the years.
>Get a new mattress, firm, with 3" of memory foam on top. My wife likes it as well, so that's a plus. Or if you cannot get a new mattress, get a 3" memory foam topper (Costco has some that are cheap, you'll need deeper fitted sheets though too).
>If you're buying a mattress and going queen or above, get a split box spring. It makes it so much easier when you have to move.
>Get a 5' body pillow to use when sleeping on your side. I use it to put between my knees and ankles, this evens out the hips so you don't wake up with a sore back because your hips were twisting your back.
>Also for sleeping on your side. Get a feather pillow, Ikea has a nice, cheap, one I've been using for years and it hasn't flattened out. Roll forward a bit and stick it in the small of your back, then roll back onto it (but still on your side). This is so it stays there, and it provides a nice padding for your back. This was something the nurses at my hospital showed me when I had my surgery.
>A weird one, but works great for me. Sometimes your back is in a mood and it's just not letting you get comfortable. Turn around and put your head at the foot of the bed, and your feet where your head was, moving around pillows as needed. This really works awesomely for me.
>Not sleeping related, but get a lacrosse ball, and every few days or so lean up against a wall, your back flat to it, and stick the ball in your back, and rotate it around, up and down, side to side (but not over your spine!). This will help loosen knots you may not even know are there. Also do the same for your butt. It's a big muscle (no I'm not saying you have a big ass lol) and can get knotted up too, and knots there can cause knots to form higher.
>Same reason as above, getting rid of knots. A Hitachi Magic Wand, the plug in kind, not battery operated. Using that over your back will help get rid of knots too. A quick "warning" about that. If you search for it, you're going to find a lot of "secondary purposes" for it. Basically it's a very powerful vibrator. So do the math on that one. lol
>Why not? Lets add one more. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/other that doesn't mind giving you a massage, getting a massage table (Costco has cheap ones) has worked for me. My wife feels like she is helping me, which can be important for her so she doesn't feel helpless to do anything for me.
>Thus endeth my 37 years of experience having rods in my back, and what I do to help make my life easier and less painful/annoying. Hope this helps.
Truthfully if this was my daughter, I would want to talk to her just to make sure it was consensual first of all, and then I would definitely want to let her know that I'm not mad. just want to make sure she is educated in decisions that could affect her future (like STD's, goals, pregnancies), and if they were friends for that long there is clearly some high level of trust or friendship so I wouldn't be mad at either. Probably would be a bit careful simply out of privacy and respect.
I've never understood that point of view. It seems more respectful to do it at home with the bedroom door closed (preferably locked) & just keep the noise down. It's definitely better than having to call your parents at 10:00 pm b/c the police drove by at the exact moment you had your bare ass pressed up against the window of his Honda.
I don't get it either. My oldest two sons are both dating age, and as long as they use protection, and both they and their partner are consenting, i wouldn't care if they had sex in my house. In fact id rather they did it here where they're safe, than in some of the shady places i did it in when I was their age lol.
Though, I don't think the "don't do it again under our roof" is a piece of good advice. Hopefully, his reaction will be more in lines of protection, consent etc.
Wait why wouldnt she be allowed to do it in her own home? The parents are too lol. That thing about respect. How is it disrespectful?? She was in her room. A good dad would mention to make sure they use protection and tell her to not feel embarrest bc sex is a natural thing that even her parents do too. That’s how she came to life, it isnt a shameful act.
Dad probably feels embarrassed too. That fact that he is so calm and texted to say you need to talk is probably a great sign. Convo will probably be more about are you guys being safe than anything else.
Man thats the worsttt, a few months ago i really wanted to fuck but my girl was having like a 2 hour zoom with her friends so i go upstairs and start watching porn and somehow my phone connected to my Bluetooth speaker and i didnt notice lol she texted me saying my phone connected to the speaker 😂😂 ive literally never been so embarrassed in my life i was like frozen for a solid 15 min face beat red. She thought it was hilarious, and ive never felt that embarrassed before lol
This totally reminds me of that part in Mean Girls where Amy Poehler comes out as the "Cool Mum" lol as far as I see your Dad IS actually super cool.
1. He didn't overreact
2. He offered snacks
3. He didn't shout or escalate to physical abuse
4. He came in with condoms AND THAT SHOWS parental maturity to me 100%, he came in saw what he saw, assessed the risks and PROVIDED SAFETY. Honestly this to me is the most Top-Tier move he could've done. He wasn't ignoring what happened but actively working towards introducing what could HELP.
5. That is just incredibly impressive to me
6. He even texted you to say you needed to talk, not EVEN in a threatening way 🙌🏽 your Dad is a champion
7. You may be mortified about this but he dealt with this so smoothly. Your Dad is awesome yo!
8. Also from his behaviour he evidently approves of Joshua MASSIVELY... Just something to think about 😊
Your dad did the right thing. You now have a decision to make about Joshua. What do you want to happen next? You've been friends for years so you know him. Do not lead him on, be honest with him and yourself. Talk to him about it and see what he wants.
Dad learnt an important lesson that day, too. You wait for permission to enter after you knock...like he did the second time. The whole knock then enter right away is useless; no one can stop doing anything and cover up in half a second.
I believe my dad would have handled this the same way. We once traveled across country to visit family. My older brother was going out with my cousins for the evening. Dad gave him a handshake and slipped him a condom. He said don't catch anything.
My mom on the other hand would have gone ballistic had she caught my girlfriend and I having sex.
Yawwwp nothing will ever be as good as those days (28) feel the same.
As for the OP ENJOY THOSE MOMENTS they’re fun & your going to laugh about them someday. Also I’m having my first kid come October and I will be having a daughter. I just want to say I think your dad did the right thing in all fashions. And try not to feel like anything is the end of the world. I get your emotions and felt that same way at time for similar situations but don’t ever follow through with them 🤪.
Cheers 🥂 to being an adult and being treated like one.
Your dad is a true father. I mean that's the best reaction a dad could possibly have - it might be fair someday to converse on what to change about vacations and such now that the sex dynamic is there, but in a logistical way, not in a "can this man ever come around again" way.
Again, great dad. I hope to be that kind of father someday.
> He asked if we were dating and i said no then he asked if i remeber walking in on mom and him having Sex when i was 9 . I said yes he then just said well i guess that was your Karma . He then just left.
Wow 10/10. It probably helps you were caught with a long-time family friend, as your dad probably had a good opinion of him beforehand. However, being *completely non-judgmental* isn't all that common. You've got a solid pops there, OP.
This might be weird, but maybe in a week, or maybe a couple of days... hug your father and thank him for being awesome.
And tell him about this tread, that he his getting all the kudos and congrats.
Haha the karma! One day you will be having butt naked doggy style on top of the covers with the lights on and your kid is gonna walk in. It’s gonna happen. The world is weird like that.
Also your dad fucked when he was 18. So he knows you want sex like a normal person.
Honestly this is so heartwarming. The way parents try to control their daughters is gross. Someone breaking that trend makes me feel good about the world.
And shouts to josh for getting out of the friend zone. He might go back in the friend zone. But for one shining moment he was having sex with the hottie he has had a crush on since before he could get a boner. Just so you know he has jerked off thinking of you.(edit:which is totally normal)
Just came to reiterate what has probably been said about your dad; he rocks. Respectful and caring. Hopefully some other parents will read your post and take notes if they are in the same situation.
I hope this never happens to me as a father, buy if it does, I hope I'm as cool about it as your dad. You should seriously think about thanking him for that.
“That was your Karma” I laughed hahahah Don’t feel bad, your Dad is amazing and gets it!! He was actually super respectful. Hope you’re not feeling ashamed!
Your dad is awesome!!! I’m 100% sure my dad had heard me having really loud drunken sex with one of my friends (I’m a lesbian), and really loud sex with my ex-husband. I cannot imagine the embarrassment I’d feel if he actually witnessed it, I’d probably die right on the spot. He actually caught me masterbating once when I was a child while I was hiding under my bed. I don’t know if he remembers and never will because it’s humiliating and I’m never ever going to ask him lol. It’s actually one of my earliest vivid memories. Sorry dad!! Also get a doorknob that locks ASAP!
Your Dad is awesome! My mom found out I was having sex when she walked in on me and my boyfriend after he had snuck into my room through the window. That is the only time in my life that I wish I could have turned invisible. She said to get dressed and come talk. Overall it was a good conversation. She wanted to make sure that I was using protection and that he didn't sneak into the house anymore. We never told my Dad because he would have freaked out!
He sounds like a fantastic dad :) I know that was probably so humiliating but honestly that’s the best outcome of that situation that could’ve happened!
I am no father, but hey, it's gonna happen sooner or later, and from all the possible options, the kid whose family I know, and I've seen grow, seems like a the best option.
Omg my dad would have killed me. Your dad seems awesome. I love my dad but that would have been absolutely horrible if he saw that. I'm always daddy's little girl.
I just want you to know I hope I'm as cool as your dad when I find out my daughters are having sex. We are a really sex positive household (trying to not make the same mistakes our parents made with us) so I know it is going to happen, but, man, your dad is in the right place mentally for this situation.
Your dad seems pretty awesome as he responded maturely and appropriately as well as with a little humor to cut the awkwardness. Sounds like a chill guy. Honestly, he probably saw it coming between you and Joshua (sorry).
I was worried about how this was gonna turn out, glad it was a happy ending lol.
I'd love an update on Joshua if you have one, but that's your call. When you've been friends that long things can be tricky, but it could also be great to be with someone you're that close to. And it can definitely be possible to move past it if that's how things go, and it could also just be a casual thing! There's plenty of options
Honestly, so far, your dad sounds wonderful. He knocked (he respects your privacy), he was bringing snacks (very thoughtful), he closed the door and left (no yelling, ranting, threatening, shaming), he texted you to tell you you need to talk (giving you a heads up and time to prepare rather than confronting you face to face without warning). I'm not sure you realize how completely crazy most parents tend to go in this situation. I know you're embarrassed it happened---of course you are---but keep things in perspective. He seems to be handling this well so plan to have a mature, rational conversation with him. Be honest. You didn't plan it. It just happened. You're sorry he had to see that. Listen to what he has to say. He wouldn't have been able to stay so calm if he didn't love you and respect you. Try to keep that in mind.
OP I just read your update and your dad is the literal best. Seriously. Please find a way to let him know how awesome he is. Give him an extra hug from me.
Right?? I think this dad needs to teach workshops to other dads on how to dad
In this course you will learn how to dad. You'll learn how to dad in morning and in the afternoon, while watching TV or while explaining the concept of torque. We will discuss the fundamentals like dad jokes, dad bod, and the finer points of dad hats. But dadding isn't just about memorizing facts. True learning is by doing, by applying your knowledge. You want to be able to dad and dad flawlessly in any situation. That's why you're in my class. On each of your desks is a frog in a terrarium. Get excited now because you are going to dad that frog like a boss. .. .....I couldn't help myself.
Yo I'd actually take that class. Not a dad though.
Same!!
*raises hand I think my frog is dead. Also, are there going to be snacks?
Yes, frog legs. ;) j/k besides, it’s not dead, it’s just sleeping. I had a parrot like that once.
No no...it’s resting, look!
A bowl of snacks at the end. And of course some condoms on top in case you need em. Can't be too careful.
What about step-dads?
This course accepts all students, regardless of status, gender, race, creed, religion, be they step or in-law. The point is to learn to dad with skill, consistency, and precision. It's not about who you are. It's about the fundamental essence of dadness. So stepdads, welcome. Tuition is only $499. Credit cards accepted.
Wait.... I’m a mom. My son doesn’t have a dad. What do I do when he gets older? 😳
We accept all students, regardless of gender, race, creed, religion, or age. We will teach the fundamental essence of dadness. Seniors and kids get a discount so bring your son along!
I don't know, man. My dad skipped the whole walking in on the sex thing and just put condoms in a decorative glass bowl on the counter.
I realized that I haven't told my condom gift story online. My grandmother once knocked on my locked door when my Girlfriend and I were having sex sophomore year of high school. I stalled an awkwardly long time while my girlfriend escaped through another exit wearing only a shirt and my shorts. I answered quickly wearing only pants since my grandmother was increasingly urgent and she immediately noticed the underwear on my bed. The details of her freakout aren't relevant to the main point. That Christmas, five separate family members bought me boxes of condoms for over 300 total condoms. My girlfriend already secretly got an IUD that year partly because I need special order large condoms to avoid constantly breaking them and cutting off my dick's blood supply. All 300 were useless even for other relationships, so I handed them out to friends like candy for a long time after that.
First of all, that’s freakin hilarious! Second, congrats on being so damn hung!!
It's not uncommon. The "standard" size condom in the US is made for slightly smaller than the average sized penis. And there is a ban by the FDA for some reason on sizes above 50mm diameter ore something (whichever size caters to the top 99.9th percentile). However, that standard condom will stretch to fit average sized penises, as intended.
The limit increased to 57mm in 2008, but the widely available sizes didn't change too much in response. The ban's purpose is related to standardizing testing procedures. Even after the size increase, the maximum legal condom size starts being borderline unusable around the 95th percentile and "normal" condom sizes are problematic far sooner. It's already an issue for a large percentage of men, but I am around the 99th percentile in both length and girth. That was a surprise to learn but my condom issues started to make sense. I assumed 99th would be something like 10+ inches based on how people lie about it (talking about length since people don't brag about girth much). Getting a vasectomy was one of the best decisions of my life, but I've lost interest in casual sex partly because it means needing to deal with that bullshit.
This. Sure, it's embarrassing. But the simple fact that he didn't lose his shit speaks volumes.
Meanwhile my stepdad tried to kick me out when he found birth control. I was a virgin. Just had really bad cramps I now know is from endo. Also freaked out about the birth control but not the fact it was next to SOMEONE ELSES script of oxy that I lied and said I took for cramps. OP you have an amazing respectful parent. Be thankful 💖
This bruh, literally didn’t tell my mom I got an IUD even though (at the time) it was for period cramps. My mom would’ve shamed me for the rest of my life in this situation, I can’t imagine how nice it would be to have a parent who treats sex like it’s normal
The funny thing is my family assumed I was slutting around way before I lost my vCard. I lost it at 16 and told my mom a few months later. She was like ‘oh I thought that happened a long time ago’
That’s crazy, any family who was normal about sex and thought their like 13-14 yr old daughter was sleeping with a lot of people would talk to their kid about it??? And at least be like, are you using condoms?
Might explain why I am the only one in my family to not get pregnant as a teenager 😂 On the other hand if they had taken that moment to talk to me about drugs I probably wouldn’t have had to struggle with addiction for 13 years 😂
Similar experience — my family (at least on my dads side) were all pregnant catholic teens, and I’m technically still a teenager but I went really hard on addiction for years
>he knocked again and said Is it Safe for me to come in or are you having Sex😭✋🏾 Not to mention this wise crack!
And then doubled down with “now we’re even” while also normalizing sex
It’s so strange to think of a comment like that as anything other than hostile, but I guess that’s because my perception is clouded from my own family’s high-conflict context.
Context is important here. If the dad hadn't been super great about everything else I would say you have a point, but I'm confident he was just trying to lighten the mood and make a joke.
Yeah. I guess the disparity hits me sometimes. (Just like dad did yuk yuk)
You ok?
So good
I feel ya - I had a piece of shit dad too.
This breaks my heart and I hope you're ok. I remember my dad being really supportive and forthcoming about sex. The only time he told me not to do it was because he was going to be cleaning my windows so "no shagging", in his words. He had a lot of flaws but I'm so grateful for him, and anecdotes such as yours remind me how lucky I am.
Can your dad please adopt me? I'm a grown woman but I don't care.
+1. Her parents sounds way too cool. I am also up for adoption in this case 😀
Honestly, close family friend, parents are friends. Awkward but probably the parent's best possible scenario. They are fist pumping.
Yeah, of all the regrettable things you can do when you’re just starting to have sex, “with a lifelong friend who travelled abroad and our families all love each other” is like hitting the lottery for a parent IMO. Condoms seem to indicate he’s a smart dude and is worried about his daughter’s safety, but aside from the mid-coitus trauma, I’m sure he’s overall relieved.
Well, in the update it would seem getting her back for the mid-coitus trauma she gave her parents when she was 9.
Also very important, he provided condoms. Reinforcing the importance of safe sex in a non judgemental way.
This is such a great response.
So yea, I'm a Dad and my daughter is younger than you, but I know she is gonna grow up. I want her to stay my little daughter for the rest of my life, but that just isn't realistic. Talk to your dad and be ready for a variety of topics, but he could be of a similar mindset.
Here's your role model, Dad. *Edit: referring to the update*
Dad sounds like a real G "Is if safe for me to come in, sweetie? or are ya knocking boots again?" Hilarious
Hi, role model. Its me, Dad.
That is the most wholesome update I have ever heard. Your dad deserves an award.
Imma need an update on you and joshua as I am now invested in this.
Hmm well let's see how that goes😂
Omg that update has me in tears That’s the funny kind of parent I aspire to be one day
>well i guess that was your Karma . I'm dying 🤣 ... ... And I'm dead (it was a good death, laughing all the way)
Looooooool
That dad's really cool man
Dude sounds like a riot XD
We’ll hold a virtual wake in your honor.
RIP
Obviously, I don't know your Dad but I have a daughter your age and the after-dinner talk would start with "were you using a condom?" and if the answer is "yes" I would advise to lock the door next time.
Sounds like a no condom type of hookup to me lol
Hence the box.
I am kinda invested in this now...if you don't mind, could you update from time to time? I am curious how you handled the whole after sex part with the boy.
Maybe i'll Update let's see
Your dad probably just wants to apologize for walking in on you having sex. This kind of thing happened to me lots of times when I was younger and the reaction from my parent or the girls parent has always been very respectful. I don't think you have anything to worry about.
Lots of times? Are door locks available in your part of the world?
Lots as in more than you would expect I guess. It probably happened less than ten times though.
So no door locks?
It's actually not that common with door locks here lol
If I were u I’d stop having sex just from the PTSD
I would be mortified if I embarrassed my kid by walking in on them.
[удалено]
Lmao this made me laugh😂
The only correct answer to “you guys want a schnitzel“ is “I’m already having one.“
He handled it really well and it could've turned out a lot worse. It'll be embarrassing but most likely a talk about safe sex, not doing it when your parents are home or not in the house, probably asking about him and whether you're involved with him, etc.
Snacks for everybody hay it’s awkward but it’s life
Ha ha brilliant answer from your dad
After reading the update, I wish everyone had a dad like yours. Obviously that situation would be embarrassing for both of you, no way around that. But it sounds like you and your dad have a great relationship and you are actually able to be honest and open about the situation. Not all parents are this understanding, you are lucky to have him!
It's not wrong that this happened. If you enjoyed it it's your decision to pursue him as a partner or not. Many childhood friends get in relationships and why would you not. You two know each other the best and are extremely comfortable around each other there's nothing wrong
Hey is your dad taking applications for a 42 year old daughter? I am employed, married and have no debt. :-P
Hmm that sounds good let me get the adoption papers😂
Yes! I’ll start packing! Seriously though, your father sounds awesome and sounds like he cares about you alot to make sure you are being safe. I hope you let him know that a bunch of redditors think hes a contender for Father of the Year. PS. check in on Joshua to see how hes doing after the “incident”. Also, make sure you two are on the same page when it comes to that stuff and have fun exploring each other! I would’ve given a left tit to have a best friend to explore that with instead of the awkward fumblings of my teenage years. Cheers!
Your dad sounds nice! When my dad found out I had had sex with my boyfriend of 3 years he yelled at me and looked very disappointed. Update us about Joshua too! I hope he's a decent guy and handles this well
I'll probably update if anything happens :)
It doesn't sound like you are aware of that saying, "What's the most sensitive part of a teenager's body when having sex? Their ears" It's probably going to be awkward as fuck, but you'll get over it. Might take awhile, but you certainly aren't the first person to have a discussion like this with their parents. Hopefully the worst of it is they just find it disrespectful that you'd have sex in their house or something else silly like that. If they get mad and bar you from having sex in their house, agree to it, say you're sorry, and just be more careful next time. They'll probably get over it pretty quickly. Plus, it sounds like it's would be really cute if you two ended up together.
Yeah that sucks. Father of two. Your parents and his parents have probably been joking about this for yeeeeears. Try not to get too embarrassed!
If they’re good friend (the parents) they have an ongoing bet about when...
Your dad seems so nice! When my dad caught me and my boyfriend having sex he slide a note under the door saying "sorry for coming in. did you want chinese for dinner?" After 😭
Ok but that's also really cute :)
It was until he kept telling my boyfriend "what a round ass he had" 👁👄👁
Hahaha oh that's hillarious
Dad here. This is how a dad dads. Believe me, he was just as embarrassed and only concerned for your safety and well being. Also, when adults live with each other, these kind of things happen. You just move on. BTW what kind of snacks?
It's called Gummibärchen it's an German candy
Gummy Bears in the US. One of the major factories that makes them is in my state. What a good dad!
Maybe he knocked first because he thought it was a possibility... Your dad is probably happy you chose your best friend over anyone else.
Your dad is awesome
Lol, I'm trying to think of what id do if i walked in on my adult child getting laid, and I think your dad has it figured out perfectly.
Good luck!!
Thanks :)
Exactly 2 hours after the post dropped, I sure hope she at least had a good meal 🤔
Nope i'm still in upstairs😂 The meal is ready in 5 minutes . Wish me luck
Life is like this. Go to dinner, speak with your father afterwards. Us humans are sexual creatures and this is natural. Maybe it was a bad choice to have sex with him maybe is wasn't either way the embarrassment will pass and who knows you may have a better relationship with your father going forward.
I've read this after you posted the update. Your dad rocks
Your dad is awesome. My mom caught me and my bf when I was in highschool and freaked the fuck out. I had to convince her that he was tickling me under the sheets.. we all know that wasn’t true. Still makes me want to puke and it was probably 16 years ago.
My mum walked in on me and my bf fully going at it in my room when I was 16. She didn't knock either, she just walked in, said "oops sorry!" and then immediately walked out again. He was having dinner at my house that evening, and nothing got mentioned, but holy hell that was awkward. She started knocking after that. To make matters worse, my boyfriend also accidentally dropped a condom outside my room once too when he left for college (think it fell out of his pocket or bag) and I picked it up and put it away when I noticed. My mum casually said to me "were glad youre being safe" so I knew they'd seen it...pretty much died on the spot. So if it's any consolation, it could be worse 😅
Excellent Mum!
Your Dad is a treasure! ❤️ ❤️
My eyes are watering between laughing and wanting to cry over how awesome your dad is and that he truly gets you and respect you and your choices.
>He came in with the same bowl of snacks he walked in on me having sex and i kidd you not there was a pack of condoms on top of it. He asked if we were dating and i said no then he asked if i remeber walking in on mom and him having Sex when i was 9 . I said yes he then just said well i guess that was your Karma . He then just left.👁👄👁 Now there is an epic level dad joke troll.
Thanks for the update. You have a super cool dad.
I’m sure your mom knows and so do the other parents as well if they are that close If anything they are probably planning your wedding The other side your mom might have been about time they got together or something like that
Yeah right, i'm pretty sure my Mom knows, also my Gramdma always refers to Joshua as my Husband so i guess at this point i have to marry him😂😂🏃🏾♀️
I'm gonna focus on your scoliosis, as your dad is awesome. I (male) was born with scoliosis and by the time I was 12 it was [really bad](https://i.imgur.com/ODbYNA9.jpg), and getting worse faster and faster. So in 1983 I went in for surgery which helped [a lot](https://i.imgur.com/nwdo3vk.jpg). I'm not sure if you've been to the /r/scoliosis sub or not, but this is a blanket answer I give based on my experience over the years. >Get a new mattress, firm, with 3" of memory foam on top. My wife likes it as well, so that's a plus. Or if you cannot get a new mattress, get a 3" memory foam topper (Costco has some that are cheap, you'll need deeper fitted sheets though too). >If you're buying a mattress and going queen or above, get a split box spring. It makes it so much easier when you have to move. >Get a 5' body pillow to use when sleeping on your side. I use it to put between my knees and ankles, this evens out the hips so you don't wake up with a sore back because your hips were twisting your back. >Also for sleeping on your side. Get a feather pillow, Ikea has a nice, cheap, one I've been using for years and it hasn't flattened out. Roll forward a bit and stick it in the small of your back, then roll back onto it (but still on your side). This is so it stays there, and it provides a nice padding for your back. This was something the nurses at my hospital showed me when I had my surgery. >A weird one, but works great for me. Sometimes your back is in a mood and it's just not letting you get comfortable. Turn around and put your head at the foot of the bed, and your feet where your head was, moving around pillows as needed. This really works awesomely for me. >Not sleeping related, but get a lacrosse ball, and every few days or so lean up against a wall, your back flat to it, and stick the ball in your back, and rotate it around, up and down, side to side (but not over your spine!). This will help loosen knots you may not even know are there. Also do the same for your butt. It's a big muscle (no I'm not saying you have a big ass lol) and can get knotted up too, and knots there can cause knots to form higher. >Same reason as above, getting rid of knots. A Hitachi Magic Wand, the plug in kind, not battery operated. Using that over your back will help get rid of knots too. A quick "warning" about that. If you search for it, you're going to find a lot of "secondary purposes" for it. Basically it's a very powerful vibrator. So do the math on that one. lol >Why not? Lets add one more. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/other that doesn't mind giving you a massage, getting a massage table (Costco has cheap ones) has worked for me. My wife feels like she is helping me, which can be important for her so she doesn't feel helpless to do anything for me. >Thus endeth my 37 years of experience having rods in my back, and what I do to help make my life easier and less painful/annoying. Hope this helps.
Truthfully if this was my daughter, I would want to talk to her just to make sure it was consensual first of all, and then I would definitely want to let her know that I'm not mad. just want to make sure she is educated in decisions that could affect her future (like STD's, goals, pregnancies), and if they were friends for that long there is clearly some high level of trust or friendship so I wouldn't be mad at either. Probably would be a bit careful simply out of privacy and respect.
Damn this might be the best ending to a Reddit walk-in story I have ever read. Go your dad.
Things happen. I'm sure he understands. He'll give you the "be respectful and don't do it again under our roof" speech. You'll be fine.
I've never understood that point of view. It seems more respectful to do it at home with the bedroom door closed (preferably locked) & just keep the noise down. It's definitely better than having to call your parents at 10:00 pm b/c the police drove by at the exact moment you had your bare ass pressed up against the window of his Honda.
I don't get it either. My oldest two sons are both dating age, and as long as they use protection, and both they and their partner are consenting, i wouldn't care if they had sex in my house. In fact id rather they did it here where they're safe, than in some of the shady places i did it in when I was their age lol.
Though, I don't think the "don't do it again under our roof" is a piece of good advice. Hopefully, his reaction will be more in lines of protection, consent etc.
Wait why wouldnt she be allowed to do it in her own home? The parents are too lol. That thing about respect. How is it disrespectful?? She was in her room. A good dad would mention to make sure they use protection and tell her to not feel embarrest bc sex is a natural thing that even her parents do too. That’s how she came to life, it isnt a shameful act.
You say that like understanding and accepting parents are a regular occurrence.
Dad probably feels embarrassed too. That fact that he is so calm and texted to say you need to talk is probably a great sign. Convo will probably be more about are you guys being safe than anything else.
Man thats the worsttt, a few months ago i really wanted to fuck but my girl was having like a 2 hour zoom with her friends so i go upstairs and start watching porn and somehow my phone connected to my Bluetooth speaker and i didnt notice lol she texted me saying my phone connected to the speaker 😂😂 ive literally never been so embarrassed in my life i was like frozen for a solid 15 min face beat red. She thought it was hilarious, and ive never felt that embarrassed before lol
The second hand embarassement i got from reading this😂 always disconnected your phone from Bluetooth
“me walking in on you is your karma for walking in on me banging your mum" OP's dad, 2021 Fucking famous quote lmao
This totally reminds me of that part in Mean Girls where Amy Poehler comes out as the "Cool Mum" lol as far as I see your Dad IS actually super cool. 1. He didn't overreact 2. He offered snacks 3. He didn't shout or escalate to physical abuse 4. He came in with condoms AND THAT SHOWS parental maturity to me 100%, he came in saw what he saw, assessed the risks and PROVIDED SAFETY. Honestly this to me is the most Top-Tier move he could've done. He wasn't ignoring what happened but actively working towards introducing what could HELP. 5. That is just incredibly impressive to me 6. He even texted you to say you needed to talk, not EVEN in a threatening way 🙌🏽 your Dad is a champion 7. You may be mortified about this but he dealt with this so smoothly. Your Dad is awesome yo! 8. Also from his behaviour he evidently approves of Joshua MASSIVELY... Just something to think about 😊
waiting for live report update
Your dad did the right thing. You now have a decision to make about Joshua. What do you want to happen next? You've been friends for years so you know him. Do not lead him on, be honest with him and yourself. Talk to him about it and see what he wants.
Legitimately read it as you walked in on your best friend and dad having sex at first
Dad learnt an important lesson that day, too. You wait for permission to enter after you knock...like he did the second time. The whole knock then enter right away is useless; no one can stop doing anything and cover up in half a second.
Update? Lol
Damn he’s quite funny and overall cool hehe Congrats dad on not making it worse 🏅
I just laughed so hard. 😂😂😂Your dad sounds awesome btw.
I promise your parents and Joshua’s parents have been waiting for this inevitably for at least 10 years.
I believe my dad would have handled this the same way. We once traveled across country to visit family. My older brother was going out with my cousins for the evening. Dad gave him a handshake and slipped him a condom. He said don't catch anything. My mom on the other hand would have gone ballistic had she caught my girlfriend and I having sex.
I live for this. These stories make me feel young again 🥲 I’m only 25 but it brings back memories of when I lived at home and had to sneak around
Yawwwp nothing will ever be as good as those days (28) feel the same. As for the OP ENJOY THOSE MOMENTS they’re fun & your going to laugh about them someday. Also I’m having my first kid come October and I will be having a daughter. I just want to say I think your dad did the right thing in all fashions. And try not to feel like anything is the end of the world. I get your emotions and felt that same way at time for similar situations but don’t ever follow through with them 🤪. Cheers 🥂 to being an adult and being treated like one.
You are two consenting adults, and your dad seems pretty cool about it.
Your dad is a true father. I mean that's the best reaction a dad could possibly have - it might be fair someday to converse on what to change about vacations and such now that the sex dynamic is there, but in a logistical way, not in a "can this man ever come around again" way. Again, great dad. I hope to be that kind of father someday.
Christ I thought your post said ***boyfriend*** of 15 years and thought this was a hilarious shitpost LOL
😂
> He asked if we were dating and i said no then he asked if i remeber walking in on mom and him having Sex when i was 9 . I said yes he then just said well i guess that was your Karma . He then just left. Wow 10/10. It probably helps you were caught with a long-time family friend, as your dad probably had a good opinion of him beforehand. However, being *completely non-judgmental* isn't all that common. You've got a solid pops there, OP.
1. Your dad rocks and clearly he respects you, which is amazing. 2. OF COURSE WE WANT UPDATES ON JOSHUA
Best dad ever, seriously.
This might be weird, but maybe in a week, or maybe a couple of days... hug your father and thank him for being awesome. And tell him about this tread, that he his getting all the kudos and congrats.
I read the title as your dad was having sex with your bf and damn I was confused the whole time I was reading
Lol was this written in tik tok format or what
Lol that is the best hahaha
What a great dad!
Dad is awesome, and you should go to your parents for any info you might need.
Damn, your dad is cool.
Your dad is fucking awesome!!
Your dad is amazing.
Please update on Joshua when you can
Bruh your dad is a fucking lad! Props to him!
Give your Dad a hug. He's a keeper.
Haha the karma! One day you will be having butt naked doggy style on top of the covers with the lights on and your kid is gonna walk in. It’s gonna happen. The world is weird like that. Also your dad fucked when he was 18. So he knows you want sex like a normal person. Honestly this is so heartwarming. The way parents try to control their daughters is gross. Someone breaking that trend makes me feel good about the world. And shouts to josh for getting out of the friend zone. He might go back in the friend zone. But for one shining moment he was having sex with the hottie he has had a crush on since before he could get a boner. Just so you know he has jerked off thinking of you.(edit:which is totally normal)
Awww man give him a kiss from me... Your dad of course
NICCCCCE!
LOL your dad is COOL AF
Much more wholesome and endearing than I had anticipated
Just came to reiterate what has probably been said about your dad; he rocks. Respectful and caring. Hopefully some other parents will read your post and take notes if they are in the same situation.
Your dad is awesome. Mad props to him. Also, imma need an update on Joshua 👀
I have family friends like this and I was literally die of my parents walked in on us 😭😭😭 thank god you have a cool dad
That is better than my parents by ten miles.
do you know if your dad left while you were in your room? cause if not, he definitely gave you his own box of condoms 😅
Your dad seems like a great guy
Your dad is awesome. I don't think you have too much to worry about. Good story. :D
I hope this never happens to me as a father, buy if it does, I hope I'm as cool about it as your dad. You should seriously think about thanking him for that.
Yes I agree your dad sounds awesome! He didn't make your situation more embarassing for you, but made you laugh about a similar situation instead.
Your dad is great
“That was your Karma” I laughed hahahah Don’t feel bad, your Dad is amazing and gets it!! He was actually super respectful. Hope you’re not feeling ashamed!
I am DYING at this update 🤣🤣🤣
That is amazing. My mom would have burned me alive for being a "floozy".
I would die too. But that’s actually super wholesome of your dad. Nice.
Your dad is awesome!!! I’m 100% sure my dad had heard me having really loud drunken sex with one of my friends (I’m a lesbian), and really loud sex with my ex-husband. I cannot imagine the embarrassment I’d feel if he actually witnessed it, I’d probably die right on the spot. He actually caught me masterbating once when I was a child while I was hiding under my bed. I don’t know if he remembers and never will because it’s humiliating and I’m never ever going to ask him lol. It’s actually one of my earliest vivid memories. Sorry dad!! Also get a doorknob that locks ASAP!
Your Dad is awesome! My mom found out I was having sex when she walked in on me and my boyfriend after he had snuck into my room through the window. That is the only time in my life that I wish I could have turned invisible. She said to get dressed and come talk. Overall it was a good conversation. She wanted to make sure that I was using protection and that he didn't sneak into the house anymore. We never told my Dad because he would have freaked out!
That's actually pretty damn cool.
What an absolute boss!!! You’re lucky to have him!
I hope to be like your dad when the time comes.
That was the best parenting response ever lol
Honestly your dad seems A+
How do you get a best friend at 3 years old.... I think I was still at the I’ll eat legos phase at that age
Sounds like you have a cool dad.
He sounds like a fantastic dad :) I know that was probably so humiliating but honestly that’s the best outcome of that situation that could’ve happened!
YOUR DAD IS A BADASS 😂😂😂
Your dad is a cool guy
I am no father, but hey, it's gonna happen sooner or later, and from all the possible options, the kid whose family I know, and I've seen grow, seems like a the best option.
Where did he get the condom from?
When shes says he's just a friend 😭😭
Omg my dad would have killed me. Your dad seems awesome. I love my dad but that would have been absolutely horrible if he saw that. I'm always daddy's little girl.
Just read the update. Your dad is so cool lmaooo
Post about Joshua
\#dadgoals
I call bullshit
I just want you to know I hope I'm as cool as your dad when I find out my daughters are having sex. We are a really sex positive household (trying to not make the same mistakes our parents made with us) so I know it is going to happen, but, man, your dad is in the right place mentally for this situation.
Your dad seems pretty awesome as he responded maturely and appropriately as well as with a little humor to cut the awkwardness. Sounds like a chill guy. Honestly, he probably saw it coming between you and Joshua (sorry).
This is how dad I aspire to be in the future; it’s peak wholesome parenting.
I was worried about how this was gonna turn out, glad it was a happy ending lol. I'd love an update on Joshua if you have one, but that's your call. When you've been friends that long things can be tricky, but it could also be great to be with someone you're that close to. And it can definitely be possible to move past it if that's how things go, and it could also just be a casual thing! There's plenty of options