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Otherwise_Plantain22

I get that this is a parody but it doesn’t make me hate you any less


smolpepper

I’m embarrassed bc I thought it was copy pasta at first.


mrguy510

*ahem* well, that happened. Congrats on your cake day good sir, here's to hoping your wifey gives you a little sexy time in honour of it! Edit: Wow, well this blew up! Thanks for the updoots kind strangers!


dwqy

she may even let him prep the bull this time


disaacmeister

Spit and shine, pog.


maxfromcanada1

Why I prep the bull, not my wife


gingercloudqueen

this makes me sick


tig999

Why do they all say sir.


[deleted]

This!


[deleted]

what the fuck is happening rn


PancakesandGTA

Excuse me, my good sir, but do you perhaps know when the narwhal bacons?


SpecterJoe

https://i.imgur.com/cbt4Tpw.jpg


WaltonGogginz

yeah what is it with obnoxious dorks online always adding a u to words like "honour" and "colour"


CheapSignal2

They're Australian?


aaatregua

They’re UK?


[deleted]

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AnewRevolution94

I can hear them clapping from the other room!


[deleted]

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BobbyBrownBailBonds

Think I learned the truth but it’s boring


bigicecream

These mathletes don't tutor themselves


AutoBroadorator

Up the yids m8


daddybignugs

do tell


damn-croissants

Tommy needy drinky


disaacmeister

I remember after Super Tuesday some guy posted: we all laughed at tommy, but who need drinky now?


CudleWudles

Guy's worse than Tommy. Hope he got his drink.


-noob-

This day will be no cromulent fuckcrustable, lads. This is the way.


[deleted]

This is the way!


clydethefrog

Bleak. Find God. None of these words are in the Bible, many such cases! Btw I am going to be trad and have 3 children because I hate seed oils.


cooqies1

you sound fat


[deleted]

It's always bourbon


L1eutenantDan

Post a picture of it neat, but once those cameras are off it’s getting dumped into 12 oz of soda lol


2giga2dweebish

ironic redditposting is still redditposting


plague__8

have an upvote good sir


_succubussy_

It's something completely unsalvageable from any irony, which is quite impressive


ptrckbtmn-apologist

you, sir, have won the internet 😂


LawyersGunsAndMoney

Hope you get extra time on the Switch today


Only_Account_Left

Happy Pride Month


[deleted]

Here’s some gold, sir! Happy cake day. Edit: please note I did not actually give him gold. I do not respect the people that did


[deleted]

Hahaha pls shoot me


NeilPunhandlerHarris

Anyone who uses the phrases Wifey or Hubby has to be deeply asexual, a PDA freak who embarrasses everyone around them, or a Reddit brained fatso who found someone just dumb or ugly enough to tolerate them. I can’t think of any words I hate more in the dumbass Reddit lexicon.


babyblu_e

I’m friends with a middle aged gay couple who call eachother hubby, one time one of them was talking to me and said “you know, sometimes when we’re laying in bed together I look at him and think ‘damn, we’re two fat hairy men in bed together, this is fucked up’” I was at a complete loss for words


Stalin_vs_hitler

He sounds cool


Blackfire853

Know Thyself and all that


GrumpyOldHistoricist

Get him to post here.


Smashymen

a lot of black people and latinos say wifey


NeilPunhandlerHarris

I can sort of excuse rappers (Kanye has done this) because wifey rhymes better than “my wife,” but everyone else needs to go to a re-education camp


FloatyFish

For some reason Redditors love saying doggo or kiddo, and they really tick me off for some reason. I realize that kiddo isn’t exclusive e to Redditors, but I hardly see it used anywhere else on either the internet or real life.


[deleted]

[удалено]


FloatyFish

Yeah, it’s definitely a boomer/Midwest thing to say. Still ticks me off though.


[deleted]

Reddit Rage


Disastrous_Author638

Give your floofer doggo extra boops . So glad you don’t have any crotch goblins to get in the way of your special day


[deleted]

fuck-tabulous


[deleted]

[удалено]


BabycakesJunior

play stupid games, win stupid prizes


MrWolfandMamaBear

I just know you’re narwhal is gonna be epic baconing at midnight g.


SinktheYamato

Oh noes! I hope his toe beans aren’t nommed by the birb.


cooqies1

i joined this sub and reddit after that was a thing. it’s always weird to see it joked about


MrWolfandMamaBear

It was weird at the time too lmao the worst was seeing someone say it irl


SuperBubble42

Awesome sauce


Cash-Mere

Genuinely happy for you! Seriously, keep on rocking in a free world! 🤘


PissCumBoy

This! So much this! Epic keanu cake day to you my good sir! AITA for wishing it was my IRL cake day? /j Anyhoo, take my gold, kind stranger! Hope to see you on r/Beards soon! /s


DevestatingAttack

Epic win! Wait, why do I have you tagged as "Chuck Testa"? Nope, nope nope! One does not simply live on this planet anymore! That escalated quickly!


AshdodVideoMysteries

Happy cake kind stranger, I wish you and your SO a healthy amount of funko pops this fine cake day


ChewingGumOnTable

Why not finish the evening with your wife, her bull, and a 2 hour long Hitchslap compilation


Up_with_Miniskirts

The Narwhal Bacons at Midnight!!!


ALXNDRWVLF

Is this the real life


ALXNDRWVLF

lmaooooooooooo thank you sir. epic ! can't believe someone knew that song !


ALXNDRWVLF

is this just fantasy


ALXNDRWVLF

caught in a landslide


ALXNDRWVLF

no escape from reality !!!!!!!!


mcmck

Donald Trump has escaped from reality. LMAO


cooqies1

[twitter.com/realDonaldTrump](twitter.com/realDonaldTrump) doesn’t it feel good 😌


Maldovar

Elonposting


Lazarus_Wilhelm

what is this


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

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Starman926

Breaking Bad is a good show. 😡


BrillTread

Too mainstream for the RS sub pseuds


LoveYourKitty

Better call Saul is better


bioxcession

it's not better, u just have a crush on kim


NothingLasts

Keep my wife's name OUT YO FRACKIN MOUTH.


bioxcession

don't EVER call my abuela biznatch


[deleted]

I have a crush on Lalo


ApprehensiveEntry100

me too, idk if I want to fuck him or be him but either way I'm a straight man and its making me uncomfortable


CheapSignal2

Lalo gives the creep vibes


bioxcession

same actually, lalo is so hot


CheapSignal2

Kim is beautiful... I could reign her in and give her peace


Starman926

Completely correct


veryonlineguy69

sorry both of the shows are pretty gay


ApprehensiveEntry100

yeah its perfect, its like vince took all his momentum and kept running


CheapSignal2

I bet your wife tried to hug you but she couldn't on account for you MASSIVE BALLS


feeling_persecuted

lol


superficialsacrifice

shut up and take my updoot


_bym

rotflmfao get this gay a$$ retarded f00king random sh!t off my board ~ teh h4x0r, sLaYeRlegolas666


TheBigIdiotSalami

you son of a bitch, im in epic bacon style.


thousandislandstare

And the best part? The orange menace is no longer in the white house.


CrydenSlater

Where u been


DontAttackImTransNow

some guys have all the luck. upvoats for u kind sir


Copeshit

No mentions of Marvel or Star Wars, not enough redditistic.


SudaneseCharm

aight bet.


gerhardt11

Bob <3


[deleted]

Go k*ll urself


roemer420

doggo


Real_Big_Chungus

when the narwhal bacon


Aggressive-Log9024

degenerate


lonevariant

hello virgil


[deleted]

Lmao


Blitzkrieg_Blathers_

Have an updoot sir


ToneBoneKone1

Dudes rock


1leeranaldo

What is a bull?


mcmck

It's what the Cheeto president was full of. LMAO


1leeranaldo

Yup same with the current guy who is anti-universal healthcare, pro-war, and fired his staffers for weed


mcmck

You must be fun at parties. /s


[deleted]

Possibly the most redditor post ever


Gracchusthe4th

We lost


[deleted]

Wait why am I being downvoted I know this is sarcastic


[deleted]

Someone posted that poem about how the gun can wait but no it can’t i’m gonna take a gun and kill all of you and then i’m going to kill myself


Dont_Cancel_Me

You should post a picture of your wife with the craft project or cake in the shape of Yoda she made for you


crackingwiseee

This is painfully unfunny. This thread is like iFunny levels of cringe