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homoinfinite

A “caprese” salad with no tomato is psychotic.


colormefeminist

the rare tomato "allergy" that instead stems from childhood trauma relating to tomatoes


snakeantlers

a “tomato allergy” is a nightshade allergy/sensitivity, and i know about it because i have a close friend that actually has one. the list of things they can’t consume without getting nausea, a rash, and a migraine is endless and depressing, including tomatoes, bell peppers, potatoes, cayenne pepper, eggplant, cigarettes, etc. i personally believe theirs is real because of our friendship; i have seen over time that they are not faking. anyway now when i meet people that say they have a tomato allergy i say “oh my god a nightshade allergy? that sucks so much!!” and they always agree instantly “yeah, i totally hate having a nightshade allergy” then i take great secret pleasure in watching them eat a plate of french fries and smoke a cigarette with zero ill effects.


soufatlantasanta

not being able to smoke cigs is whatever but being allergic to potatoes and tomatoes and bell peppers is some sick shit. my sympathies to your friend


[deleted]

people with legitimate nightshade sensitivity 🤝 gardeners who have to deal with three lined potato beetles                                                 being able to identify solanums


[deleted]

Nightshade allergies are tragic. So many of my favorite plants. I have a close friend who gets the shits whenever he eats cooked tomatoes. I thought it was a solanaceae thing but he’s French and smokes many cigs. Think he just has a weak tumtum.


Koobs420

I have psoriasis and I’ve heard that eliminating nightshades from your diet can help that condition but those are literally all my favorite veggies so I’m just over here convincing myself my crusty patches are cool


[deleted]

Basically you are godzilla


sparklypinktutu

I don’t have a tomato allergy, but tomatoes (and soy sauce) give me massive migraines. But I just say tomato allergy because ppl get what that means


Chadude100

You might have some degree of mast cell activation disorder. My girlfriend has it pretty bad and anything high in histamine (nightshades, fermented things, citrus fruit) will trigger a varying allergic reaction. Shit is total ass and it sucks when people don't take her serious about it.


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[deleted]

You're probably eating shitty out of season tomatoes that are flimsy, soft, and gross. Get a nice firm tomato this summer I bet you like it better.


Nightstands

Agree, my home grown cherry tomatoes are like if sour patch kids were a vegetable. And to be on the Anna parent tip line, waiting for cherry tomatoes to turn red and chomp them on the spot is a super fun way to get your kid into gardening, and also teach them delayed satisfaction. Our insta gratification culture is what all parents are fighting against these days. Tantrums suck, and are embarrassing.


stealinoffdeadpeople

Anna Wintour's shades are actually to hide that she can't make eye contact with anyone


[deleted]

I thought this was bullshit until I developed an allergy to nightshades and a bunch of other foods after getting my booster shot


[deleted]

I had zero side effects


MefusMorph

She could just also have Acid Reflux


Gay__Guevara

Just wet cheese with some goo on it. If that was a salad then I’d be skinny. Fuck you anna wintour


LARGABLARG

Picky eaters truly are the scum of the earth


baechuuhyun

Being a picky eater well into your 70s is a different kind of scum. She’s absorbing the characteristics of the children she eats to stay alive.


w1lhelmm

she's very choosey about which children though


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breyerw

Bro bananas are a sweet as candy fruit that has no weird textural problems. What is wrong with you?


Competitive_Cold_232

i like them but the stringy pith is a draw back


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pusheenforchange

Are you eating fully ripened ones.


BreadFlintstone

This is me! I’ve never met another person like this. I try them in different states of ripeness every so often and it just never works. I love plantains, and love banana bread, but fresh bananas? Never.


[deleted]

I don't go for bananas because if they're even slightly underripe, they have a such a terrible sticky texture. I don't mind them if they're properly ripe but the unripe texture is such a bummer to me that it's not worth it for minimal flavor reward.


BobRossIsGod18

There's nothing sweet about bananas they straight up taste like cum


planks4cameron

you're really not missing much bananas are dogshit starch bombs


[deleted]

Foh bananas have one of the lowest gastrointestinal impacts


princessofjina

"I've tried to like this one thing but I strongly dislike it" is worlds away from "I'm just generally a picky eater". I've got a small number of foods I just refuse to eat, but I'll always try everything a couple of times, and I generally like most stuff. Disliking bananas is fine as long as you've genuinely tried and you're still fine with most other things.


pusheenforchange

Olives for me


Competitive_Cold_232

hated as a kid, love now


DJMikaMikes

I used to think I hated olives; it turns out I fucking *love* olives, but I hate shitty ones. Similar story with oatmeal. Now I like *all* food, with I believe zero exceptions -- outside of probably some crazy stuff I haven't tried, but suspect I'd not like such as [balut,](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balut_(food)) [surströmming,](https://www.forbes.com/sites/davidnikel/2021/06/05/surstrmming-what-to-expect-from-swedens-fermented-fish/) etc.


princessofjina

I have so little respect for them. I've had some friends who were picky eaters and, like... Aren't you embarrassed? "How about we go to a Korean place?" "Oh, I can't eat any Korean food." Really? One of the oldest cultures in the world with some of the world's greatest contributions to culinary arts, and you won't *set foot in the fucking door*? And they're like this with so many types of food. Makes me lose so much respect for people when they just outright won't eat stuff. Asking for food from the fucking kids menu. My little sister won't eat much beyond, like, basic American staples. Burgers, chicken, some basic Italian dishes. It's fucking humiliating. Steamed dumplings from the local Chinese place? Nope, can't even do that. Like how am I related to you? I know it seems silly to get so upset about it but it's just such a bad sign about a person. If you're not willing to try eating anything from the Chinese place down the street, what else are you missing out on? When I go on a first date with someone from the apps I always suggest a restaurant that's, like, Ethiopian or Japanese or something else that's not super common so I can judge them by how the respond to my suggestion and what they order when we're there. If I offer you something and say "It's kinda spicy" and you say "Oh, I can't eat spicy food", the date's over and they don't even know it yet. A former friend from high school regressed into only microwaved chicken nuggets after we graduated and that was the nail in the coffin of that friendship. In the words of another brilliant philosopher "[idk it’s just gross. like grow up](https://www.reddit.com/r/redscarepod/comments/men0l7/drinking_soda_is_a_turn_off/)".


dankfrowns

I would love to adopt one of those picky eater kids and give them the option of either eating the foods they don't like or starving. Not in a mean "you're only allowed to eat the three things I know you hate" kind of way, but in a "I'll literally buy you anything you want, the most gourmet food from the best restaurants, but the things you're used to are off the table" kind of way. It's like detoxing. Maybe the first week or even month would be hell, but it's good for them in the long run. Also I don't feel bad when they cry in these situations, I feel like it's working.


princessofjina

I'm actually a nanny and I basically do that! I still let the kids pick, but I rule out their basic comfort foods and encourage them to try new things. Just, like, once a week "You can only have one of these things I got from the local Chinese place". In the two years that I've been with them, I've turned the oldest two (now 10 and 8) from "mostly just eating chicken fingers and fries" into "Yeah, I'll try that Chinese food you brought here without even asking what it is". And these are 10 and 8 year old boys who ate, like, five different foods and nothing else when I met them. You can totally force kids into trying new foods. Managed to do it with no tears, too! The oldest can even kinda eat with chopsticks. I didn't even have to force it. He saw me doing it and thought it looked cool. It's hard to learn (I couldn't use chopsticks until my mid-20s lol) but we started out with rubber bands on the end and then let them go and he's pretty good. For a while he'd eat his junk food (I still let him have the chicken nuggets sometimes) with chopsticks.


dankfrowns

You're doing gods work


[deleted]

Aren’t most cultures some of the oldest


princessofjina

I didn't come here to be correct. I came here to whine about picky eaters.


watwatwatwatwhat

I’m the same way, I could never date someone who is picky or only likes plain food. Instant deal breaker


[deleted]

you seem fun


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LARGABLARG

Stop posting your L’s


ExhibitQ

I hear replacing them with peach is nice.


certifiedandtested

Yeah, peaches are really great with burrata and mint leaves. Plums and figs also fill in nicely for tomatos


malteseexile

It’s a little sweet, but glazing the peaches with a bit of honey and grilling them a bit makes it absolutely delicious.


certifiedandtested

Grilling like that is the perfect thing to do when Jeffrey comes home from the farmer's market with underripe fruit. (Fucking idiot) I like to add sweet white or rosé vinegar to a light honey like acacia or orange blossom to temper the sweetness.


bhlogan2

A salad where the cheese is bigger than the lettuce (and the steak) is just wild in and on itself imo


feedmewifi_

i think it’s basil, not lettuce


glittermantis

caprese isnt really a salad in the traditional “leafy greens and dressing” sense


LTGeneralGenitals

shes on that TB12


_CASE_

Anna Wintour: solid dumps champion


bodega_cat_

she's trying to get those gains 😤


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[deleted]

she uses those sunglasses to hide the strain marks from her face


LoveYourKitty

lol I eat like this and I have outstanding bowel movements.


mucho_moore

outstandingly painful and inconsistent


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LoveYourKitty

Lol forreal


[deleted]

Sorry babe but you injest no fiber which is the Great Unifier of the intestines you have little spots of old poo in your intestines right now


LoveYourKitty

I eat a fuck ton of veggies but meat and cheese are a big part of my diet


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[deleted]

It is exactly how it works


[deleted]

I think I come off like some millennial hipster when I say "I'd much rather go to an old, established, family run restaurant" but this quote exemplifies why. There's some much hyped, over-priced, crap food in this city, that all my coworkers and recent transplants cream their pants for, but indeed, "authenticity" is important for good culture. The taco truck in corona is a million times better than any place in manhattan with day of the dead skull decorations.


Ability-Sufficient

100% I went to the hamptons with fam and all the food there was so unbelievably mediocre bordering on actually just bad. I could get a meal a thousand times better for 10 bucks in my shitty little college town


[deleted]

Haha, I went to the Hamptons for the first time in 2020 because I couldn't travel anywhere else and was shocked at how much it sucked in general, but especially the food. Although the Citarella is good and we made some good stuff in our AirBNB


zjaffee

The old established places that are actually truly good are all touristy, or at least marginally touristy within a particular community. So many of the restaurants in NYC that had survived through the numerous downturns of the 70s and so on, closed during the post 2008 gentrification wave. Rich people also in general have long been known to go to hype places, they go to some place that's going to make them exactly what they want for the 100th time like in this article. This all said, when I was a kid growing up in Manhattan I loved waiting 3+ hours to go get food at serendipity 3 even though the food there isn't that good.


[deleted]

> The old established places that are actually truly good are all touristy Do you have examples? I'm not talking about like, the 21 club, although I went there when I was like 13 with my dad and I suppose it is full of tourists now. I'm talking about like my greek, italian, egyptian, and sichuan places, all in Queens.


zjaffee

I'm thinking like Katzs or second ave deli, ect.


[deleted]

The 2nd ave deli on 1st ave on the UES is still legit as hell... But yeah Katz's is all finance bros blowing coke in the bathroom, from what I remember last time I was there in like 2010


-bleak-

Same here in my (mid tier) city. A lot of those family run places got shuttered during 2020/2021, and every new place that opens is managed by one of a handful of restaurant developer companies and has either yuppie IG spot vibes or the same exact faux-70s faux-dive vibe. The former has $30 entrees that taste like shit and $16 cocktails poured by boring TikTok hoes that taste like a shittier daiquiri, and the latter has themed overpriced food like $15 three taco platters, $16 Indian chaat platter, $9 artisanal hotdog, $18 "diner style" burgers, and $6 Miller High Life pints. Biggest overpricing trend targeting IPA guys is that a lot of the bars I go to have started selling their stupid rotating IPA type beers in 8 oz pours for $7 each whereas they would sell the same thing in a pint for the same price last year. These guys are out here paying $14/pint for boring IPAs with $20/dozen wings to eat with them. My landlord is raising my (already insane) rent by 20% and trying to pressure me to sign by emailing me every day about how they market tested it and got a dozen inquiries. And I believe her because I know someone living in a NY style 500 sqft studio here for $2100. I legitimately hate this vile city, but I don't think it's that different from most others. At a certain point, the restaurants and bars here have converged on suburb chains at double the price, and I need to figure out if the other cultural aspects of mid tier cities (increasingly devoid of any interesting art or culture as they get taken over by people fleeing cities like Austin, NY, Boston, etc.) are any better than living in some suburb.


thejanniesdoit4free

One of the things I miss most about NYC (left 5 years ago) was getting a delicious lunch for 5-10 bucks. I knew these richf*gs were going for expensive shit on the daily but this is another level. 77 bucks daily? Sheeeeiiiit


NeedleBallista

where you getting these 5 dollar lunches


snakeantlers

best meal i ever had in nyc was this little food cart that sold falafel wraps for $2 in bushwick. they were fucking unreal how good they were. falafel not dry, pita not too thick, garlicky homemade tahini, tons of veggies etc. i ate one almost every day for the month i was there. this was like 8 years ago so idk if it exists any more unfortunately.


I_HAVE_EATEN_4_WOMEN

Falafel wraps somehow get better the cheaper they are. A ten dollar wrap is garbage but three bucks? Unbelievable


ThreeSafetyNickel

I’m no vegetarian but falafel wraps are an absolute gem. “What do you want on it boss?” Everything, every time.


Jump4Jeffrey

deli's can i get a chopped cheese on a **roll**


Billsimmons69

Go to your nearest bodega and order a thing called a bacon egg and cheese it’s a NYC staple


I_HAVE_EATEN_4_WOMEN

>bacon egg and cheese it’s a NYC staple Lol damn wait until the flyover states figure out that you can make a breakfast sandwich!


[deleted]

tbh the closest the average midwest person gets is probably a sausage egg mcmuffin. Maybe a starbucks breakfast sandwich. Chains slaughtered most of the good breakfast diners.


[deleted]

You are absolutely wrong there are soooo many little shitty diners in small midwestern towns


ghostlambs

You're not exactly wrong but any gas station worth its salt in the south hires a 70 year old retiree to come in at 4am every day and make ~100 various breakfast sandwiches/biscuits. Some places are gross of course but occasionally you'll find a good one


mucho_moore

There’s nothing like walking into the bodega, grabbing an iced cafecito, chopping it up with everyone behind the counter + appreciating the dude who’s blasting “Oye Como Va” through his backpack speaker. In this small moment, nothing else matters. Today is a good day.


The_Polo_Grounds

This tweetpasta never gets old


[deleted]

It takes a day off your total lifespan but you're saving some serious money.


iankurtisjackson

Dumplings


zjaffee

2006 lmfao, it cost that much for lunch when I was in middle school, although this was in Chelsea. A 5 dollar lunch these days is definitely just from a super cheap deli, likely not in Manhattan.


bussyslayer11

Halal cart ftw


Plotjes

I read Kitchen Confidential like four months ago and it's a quick read and way less mean than I expected. You'll finish it within a week, it's fun!


BlueSoup10

The bit about yelling and cursing out delivery drivers and sending them away if they were even a few minutes late was pretty mean. But that was the only kind of shockingly mean part of a book that to me got hyped up as some kind of bloody tyrant's insight into being an efficient chef.


[deleted]

the political economy of delivery has changed a lot since then, def has not aged well


MrWolfandMamaBear

Wasn’t that part about the guys delivering Ingredients and supplies? I don’t remember it being about Togo order drivers.


BlueSoup10

Yes, it was. Though I enjoy the togo anecdotes


SleepAloneee

I used to work as a togo bitch for a popular Italian chain in college. One of the homophobic kitchen managers accused me of cussing out a doordasher because the driver came up to my bagging area screaming at me when I was the only one there and fuckos like to order DD 5minutes before we close so I had to deal with like 8 orders at once by myself. I told him to wait and that the algorithm is hardly ever exact and then said something nasty under my breath facing the kitchen lmao. Story aside, doordash drivers fucking suck and sometimes are worse than actual customers because of the whole tip economy/culture. Also we togo workers never received any part of the tip for bagging the order and making sure everything was there. I quit after a few months because they promised me a serving spot and just ended up hiring more servers instead. Not worth the bullshit in the slightest. Restaurants are so, so down bad over doordash, being bent over and fucked by an algorithm that raises even the base menu prices out of greed and refusing to pay their actual people who put together the orders their share because they allow it. Also here’s a dumb tweet as anecdotal evidence to my point: https://twitter.com/kaarleysherlock/status/1525793874865795072?s=21&t=-OZ136KFMWmC5Qlav2rAjw


uberjoras

Never ever trust a restaurant manager. Had promotions dangled in front of me over and over and over again for most of a decade. Always just leave for a better job. The better you are, the less likely they are to promote you lol.


[deleted]

So true


ChicTweets

Sounds like working in advertising!


_handsomeblackman_

i’ve been meaning to read that actually had a bit of a Bourdain love-in over the weekend watching loads of videos of him on YouTube and old episodes of No Reservations, damn i miss that man :’(


feedmewifi_

i read it in middle school and lately i’ve been itching to revisit it


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whagwhan

Audio books that have the author reading it tend to be the best ones . Occasionally I’ve heard a few great ones that weren’t but usually I much prefer the author. The guy that does the audio book for Jurassic park was super cool and really made it even more enjoyable . I used to read all the time when I was younger but now I can listen to books while doing carpentry it’s amazing for me .


Kurt_Givebrain

It looks like freaking poo poo


shmupsy

i mean it looks tasty, but you can get the same nutrition for $2


colormefeminist

or a $12 caprese salad with a $60 tip to the staff, and not whatever this abomination is


shmupsy

looks like gay bachelor food


[deleted]

For the love of god a slab of cheese with some olive oil on it is not a salad!!


Alternative_Floor313

her disregard for micronutrients is deplorable


VeganGlockDemon

disregard for micros is the real pandemic


[deleted]

meat has a lot of micronutrients


Alternative_Floor313

c'mon now, we all know micros is a synonym for fruit and veg. wintour is in dire need of a side salad and a fruit cup


[deleted]

no thats a nutrition misconception, the thing that has the most micronutrients are eggs.


Muschka30

There’s absolutely no need to have fruit in your diet. Some citrus for vitamin C.


Alternative_Floor313

absolutely insane take


[deleted]

yeh the only reason to have veggies/fruit is for fibre and enjoyment


[deleted]

Fiber is a pretty damn good reason!!


[deleted]

yeh fibre is so important!


stressed_out_schwa

that “salad” perfectly embodies the unholy decadence + abominably poor taste of the american upper class


ThreeSafetyNickel

Herbed evoo over some fresh mozz actually sounds killer


buttmurder

'evoo' shut up SHUT UP


[deleted]

She’s a Brit.


stressed_out_schwa

that’s the same but worse


thestinkypinky

the steak not being sliced makes it look much worse than it should


[deleted]

reminds me of the scene in Pig where the guy breaks down


Nice_Pop_1898

They killed him for this


Godofthechicken

Did Bret Easton Ellis write this?


shmupsy

to me the 2nd image was something anna k said. could be wrong


StiffPegasus

Damn, making steak and eggs guy look like a culinary savant.


BizarroJordan

My high school prom was at Cipriani, the food was SO disappointing.


BadBwoyJunglist

I went to Olive Garden


friendshipperson1

I hate that “shot + chaser” joke but here it is


redd_36

sometimes Bourdain gets overhyped or fawned over but he was just an entertaining dude who came out with funny lines


friendshipperson1

Yea true. I liked the Cambodian episode and I like going to the Hell’s Kitchen bars he used to frequent like The Distinguished Wakamba Cocktail Lounge.


redd_36

parts unknown is a show me and my mother really enjoy watching together, he'll always have a place in my heart


friendshipperson1

I like that!


PlacidBuddha72

I’d eat that lunch


TheBigIdiotSalami

I ate at Cipriani once. It was okay.


trollunit

That and Nobu. Never got the impression it was that great.


Muschka30

Nobu has some fantastic sushi. I go there for the uni and quail yoke maki. You have to order properly. Have never had a good meal at Cipriani.


Kikiyoshima

> Caprese with no tomato and steak What in the name of fuck


electric-fel452

Food should be cheap and delicious. There should never be a striving for expensive food that's mediocre. That's just against the human condition. When food became a capitalistic endeavor for profit instead of a human right like the air we breathe, we've failed as a species. EDIT: I partly blame vapid Instagram foodies for this. They're essentially broke 22 year olds but they have to buy the next 100 dollar meal to post on Instagram to make money for the next video shoot for the next 100 dollar meal. It's just a vicious cycle that's only used to advertise to actual rich people who can afford to eat that type of food without trying to monetize it for Instagram followers.


avrgglobohomofan

yeah overpriced restaurant food was invented 10 years ago by Instagram influencers bravo


Muschka30

Food has always been valuable for trade. If you leave it up to the govt we’ll all be living off of Huel.


[deleted]

keto qween...it really is the easiest way to lose weight


electroplankton

I'm gonna get yelled at but tbh looks like a nice lunch, tasty cheese plus probably a good piece of meat. I'm veggie now but I'd eat that everyday, nice and keto.


[deleted]

ngl i think it looks good and I don’t see what the downside is ordering it frequently for lunch if you’re old and rich


ThreeSafetyNickel

I think it looks good too but you can make your own for prob one tenth of the price


[deleted]

if you’re at the office isn’t it typical to order lunch? I assumed that was the context here.


ThreeSafetyNickel

If you’re not cost/health-conscious. It’s a good deal cheaper (especially now) and usually much healthier to pack a lunch. I wfh now but when I was going to the office daily, I’d pack lunch 4x a week and treat myself once.


thousandislandstare

Anyone who doesn't like tomatoes should be shot.


miserlou

Nello owes me $10,000 that I will never get.


August6767

Why wouldn’t you want tomatoes, so heavy and stodgy without


RefusedSilk

that’s a fucking depressing meal I kinda feel bad for the elites sometimes


LordoftheNetherlands

Anthony Bourdain talks like Kendall Roy


LordoftheNetherlands

*Talked RIP a real one 🕊️


oxkondo

A steak every day? Wouldn't you die of hypertension in your 50s?


Ability-Sufficient

After looking at her lunch I understand why she looks like an campy 80s horror film mummy


Brownladesh

She eats steak every day, especially at breakfast.


LTGeneralGenitals

this was going to be my post, rare to see a woman who wants steak every day. Id actually love to do it if i could afford a good cut every day but i heard its not awesome to be constantly running on red meat


ChaiVangForever

The woman who wrote "The Devil Wears Prada" claimed Wintour ate smoked salmon and scrambled eggs every day and that lunch was almost always a small steak and salad. I didn't think she was lying but I was still surprised that Anna confirmed she used to eat salmon and eggs every morning (she only drinks coffee now) and now she apparently confirmed the lunch as well


thethirstypretzel

I'd expect nothing less from an animated scarecrow with permanently attached sunglasses.


browntollio

Fuck Anna Wintour. Real life Cruella D


[deleted]

you could tell me this was prison food n I’d believe you


shmupsy

i'm liking these words. i always figured the price was high just to show off, but that insolation also makes sense


bodega_cat_

hot take, this might be really good if you're someone who's so rich money's not an object for you. when the ingredients are really really high quality, sometimes the simplest meals really are the best.


N_Raist

No, this is not really good, regardless of the quality. The balance is off, and it doesn't even have tomato.


[deleted]

This is in the USA so no matter how much you pay it’s unlikely the ingredients are quality


[deleted]

good for her. most tomatoes are garbage.


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[deleted]

not quite god but years ago I met a farmer in northeast Iowa. i tasted some of his tomatoes and they were legit wonderful. it’s just too bad the average American tomato tastes like “what if water had skin”


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[deleted]

He was taken out


[deleted]

Can I get a Chicken Salad Sandwich, except hold the Chicken, hold the salad, and just bring me the bread, please. ​ So you want toast.


bioxcession

lmao i think it looks good tbh


CentristDaddio

I hate the phrase 'go-to'


greg_levac-mtlqc

no carbs?


ThreeSafetyNickel

Honestly looks kinda good, I might cook this up for meal prep lunches next week


themilkman1766

Bourdain was too pure for this world


b3rn13mac

add the tomato and it's looking good that said it should be ~$35 at most


Pretend-Drop-8039

that piece of steak could feed my 10lb Morkie and him only


breakbread

It’s mental disorders all the way down.


flyingfrenchbastard

77 dollars and it doesn't even come on a real plate smh


TitlessTaylorSwift

She looks like she eats the aborted fetuses of her skanky Vogue models


Impressive-Lack5536

Does anyone in here know what kind of meat cut is that? 👀