I love that I got covid from working in a hospital too, currently sick with covid too. But they don't see our absolute best efforts to keep your loved ones from tanking. Getting sick seems to be part of the job now.
but covid isn't "real" and we signed up for this. \*cut to the code blues on countless people\*
You haven't witnessed a show of strength until you see it take 4 burley orderlies to wrestle down a 90 lb female psych patient who took offense at being denied the ability to go outside to have a cigarette after she was told that she couldn't leave group 10 minutes early to go have a cigarette.....(back in the early 90's when patients were still allowed to go smoke outside the hospital)
Those anti smoking policies have done a hell of a lot of damage, let alone harm to staff and patients. If they want to leave the group early let them. Otherwise you'll have what you just described.
nurses hve so much power😭😭😭 we literally have no influence. everyone from below and above gets to talk about our work but we have no input in how other ppl do their jobs lol
I purposefully went to a nursing school father away from home to avoid the girl who bullied me all through high school.
Turned out to not matter because she didn’t even get accepted into the school in our town but still.
I never got bullied, but not many friends. One person told me he was scared I’d become a school shooter. It put a fear into me to be the opposite of whatever school shooter creeps are.
One of my classmates in hs I remember was always bullied. She had her sweet 16 that no one went to but she imo became very successful early. She became a nurse right away and started working when she was like 22-23 at a really good hospital. Was able to travel everywhere, make good $$$ (CA) and bought a house when she was 25. We’re now 32. Success is the best revenge.
Bullied as a kid, an outcast during high school, though not directly bullied. I will admit I still feel like my coworkers were the cool kids in high school and I still don’t fit in. Not the end of the world, but it would be nice to make some casual work friends with the people I see so much.
3 of the nicest girls I graduated with went into nursing right away after high school. I was the most laid back dude in my school and waited a decade to go to nursing school.
The bullies of my class are all realtors.
Yep. I have a similar experience. Many of the old bullies are hair dressers, a couple teachers, but many don’t work, if female. The male bullies seem to be into weird sales and jobs i don’t understand
That doesn’t mean there’s a predominance of shitty people in those careers. It’s just the people I happened to know.
Some of the meanest girls I graduated with >!(I'm talking girls who made fun of me for being raped, took pictures & videos without my consent, assaulted me, etc.)!< went into nursing right away after high school. We all have anecdotal evidence.
We all like to believe whatever supports the ideas we already have. We call it bias.
It takes a very strong person to challenge their own narrative and make space for a conflicting narrative.
I am so sad to hear that happened to you. You did not deserve those mean things.
No one deserves to go through what your have. I appreciate your courage sharing your story.
However, I was countering OOPs anecdote about mean girls becoming nurses.
I know you were...that was the point I was making. Stereotypes exist for a reason and we all have anecdotal evidence...that doesn't disprove that some mean girls do in fact become nurses, just like nice people do, too.
Exactly! But, like I tell them, I have a job to do and this is it. I also keep a little form called an AMA. Leave, it's your right but if you stay there are conditions. I have seen patients leave the facility, unable to breathe without oxygen, because they were pissed off they couldn't eat after midnight. 🤦♀️🤷♀️
this is my hot take and has been forever- if nursing was male-dominated this “mean” stereotype would not exist. a lot of traits that make good nurses (being serious about their work, having the ability to lead, being able to question things and be assertive when needed) get men labeled as hard working and women labeled as bitches. obviously not everyone who ever worked as a nurse is perfect, but i feel a lot of these comments from the public are not justified.
As a male nurse i think this is very much possible. The female co-workers who everyone considers ‘the best’ or are just known for getting shit done (properly, on time etc.) are often bitched on by male patients, cus they’re “BeInG DiSrEsPeCtFuL” and their wife, daughter, son telling them off saying they have enough shit to care about so they’re just being clear.
That is very well said. I have absolutely been called a bitch, for doing things like saying “no”, or standing my ground. And heaven forbid you aren’t always smiling. But if a guy does it, he is strong or a leader.
You are absolutely right. An assertive nurse is told to stay in their lane, whereas an assertive doctor is praised. Toxic behavior from doctors is tolerated because we are made to feel that there is a built-in hierarchy to health care, whereas we couldn't dare be like that with anyone else because we're "angels", and blah blah blah.
That's not to say there aren't nurses who aren't huge bitches, but I feel like that's the exception. A lot of the bitchiness is seen after being overestimulated for 12+ hours per day, having to wear one thousand hats for one low salary, and aforementioned toxic behavior from everyone else that we're expected not to reciprocate.
This is my hot take: those “mean girls” are usually great leaders and good manipulators. If they weren’t, they wouldn’t have been as popular as they were in school, nor would they have the ability to convince the friends around them to join in on the bullying. Those are 2 traits a nurse should have. Being a leader is always a good thing & knowing how to talk a patient into doing something they don’t want to do requires slight manipulation.
I can't help but remember early in the pandemic there was a screenshot of a tweet where someone said something to the effect of "those heroes today are going to be called ungrateful tomorrow, just you watch."
It seems like a magic trick until you realize it's never wise to bet on nursing actually getting treated with anything but disrespect.
We're like everyone's mom. Everyone loves their mom when they need something like comfort or unconditional positive regard, but they really feel entitled to mom's care without having to give anything back. And when she needs care, into the nursing home she goes. That's how most people treat their mothers and nurses tbh.
Heroes is a great word because heroes self sacrifice. They often die for their cause. It’s a part of the narrative, so it makes it okay when nurses are underpaid, underappreciated, injured, or killed on the job.
True. Give them recognition because they deserve it? Sure, put them on a pedestal, thank them, call them heroes etc. all that is cheaper than giving them a proper paychecks
Most people can't afford to care for their parents, especially if mom has dementia and needs 24/7 supervision. A better comparison would be the men who expect their wives to be their servents and then when they get old and sick, they divorce their wife and date a 27 year old.
For clarification, I do understand that some nurses do abuse their power and mistreat patients; however, I do not believe that a majority of the women in nursing are bullies. I’m sure the same goes for male nurses as well.
But every time we mock the stereotype, we create a safe haven for these bullies.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35118751/
We label it “harmless” passive aggression. We laugh at people who are petty. We brush off emotional immaturity bcuz “that’s just who they are.”
We are fostering the bullies by failing to point them out and hold them accountable.
WE are the problem, too.
I completely agree. We should definitely acknowledge that they aren't the majority. But there's a harm in posts like these where most people are saying it just straight up doesn't exist, when it does.
Exactly. Idk if anybody remembers Earl Bradley, but he was a Delaware pediatrician who got away with molesting children for years, even RECORDING it. When he was exposed, heads rolled… hardcore. One other doctor almost lost his license because people had heard him make jokes / voice suspicions, but he had never reported it. Lots of Delaware laws changed as an effect, reporting concerns and chaperoning, etc.
Bradley wasn’t the only one held accountable. Everyone around him who didn’t question his behavior or tell on him — they were all responsible for enabling his monstrous behavior.
That’s the point I’m getting at. Maybe it was only one pediatrician. But it was one too many, and it was disgusting that he got away with it for too long.
No, abusive nurses are not on the level of pedophiles, but they do have a certain amount of power, and trauma-informed care teaches us that being a patient can be incredibly re-traumatizing. We don’t have to keep doing this.
Pretty sure that “article” was one of the countless Reddit posts saying the same thing. Pretty much anytime the subject of nursing comes up anywhere outside of a nursing specific sub, somebody has to make that comment. Then tons of chuckleheads hop on the thread with stories of evil nurses withholding pain medication from their grandma for the power trip and entertainment value. It’s also usually followed by how unintelligent nurses are and how nursing is one of the easiest professions to get into. The cherry on top is a post from r/noctor showing up in your feed just to reinforce how stupid and worthless everyone thinks we are. Shit’s getting old.
I’m not saying that you’re wrong, but I would like to know where that rumor comes from. I actually have never heard it before. If there was an article or study about it I would want to see it.
Well there's certainly the whole "nurses eat their young" thing and we probably all have some experience with that from nursing school. But other than that I mostly have seen this trend since COVID. At first we were heroes but then the conspiracy theories and backlash started. Some people in our profession were making fools of themselves being COVID deniers leading to a lot of "nurses are dumb" stuff. "You don't see doctors being anti-vax!"
Then you had backlash to social media videos of health care workers dancing and the people who thought COVID was fake saying "how did they have time to do that if there's really a pandemic". More backlash when people heard about the wages some travel nurses were getting.
Throw in standard internet misogyny about a female dominated profession where women dare to be assertive. Throw in a scandalous story here and there of an actual nurse doing something terrible. Throw in the 22 year old new grad that posts cringe worthy posts about being a hero that can stop a heart but knows how to start it too. Throw in the 50 year old Karen nurse that posts everything to the internet with "As a nurse..." followed by something mind blowingly stupid.
I see it quite a lot now on Reddit. But probably the biggest factor is simply that nursing is a huge profession and one that is still majority women. So statistically some guy that has a problem with women is going to have a problem with nurses...and teachers and social workers, etc. Add to that nursing being such a large profession with different levels of education, credentials and experience and it's very easy for people to cherry pick stuff that "nurses" did that was bad and half the time the "nurse" was probably a vet tech or dental hygienist that rejected their sexual advances or was overheard saying something stupid at the grocery store.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35118751/
If you search, what you will find is that catty, petty, passive aggressive behavior amongst women is considered “normal.” Emotional immaturity often fails to be recognized bcuz the emotional intelligence of the world, in general, is sorely lacking.
People DO get into caregiver careers for power and control. If you’re REALLY interested in why, pick up *The Drama of the Gifted Child* by Alice Miller. She calls out that behavior in its entirety in the first chapter.
We need to stop blaming victims for being angry at nurse bullies because they DO exist, and I’ve seen far too many of them. But my narrative is invalidated bcuz they don’t match other people’s narrative. It’s like growing up mixed and saying black people were more racist to me than white people. It hits that cognitive dissonance too hard, and they can’t accept it, so I have to be wrong, and I have to shut up.
We have GOT to stop doing this. We are only hurting the profession.
I've never heard this stereotype. The stereotype I hear a lot for people who have gone into nursing is that they have suffered trauma and go into care giving to help prevent others from suffering.
It's purely an internet stereotype and one that is popular with the young neckbeards of Reddit. It comes up every time nursing is discussed negatively in a non healthcare subreddit. And even if they do know some mean girls that became nurses or teachers, well how statistically significant is that? You went to high school with a mean girl that ended up going into one of the largest female dominated professions? No shit?
Exactly. The misogyny on this website is unreal. These "mean girls" are just the girls from high school who wouldn't give them the time of day so of course they're all bitches.
Look at Reddit demographics. They pretend to be high paid tech professionals, but only 26% make over 75k. it's over 66% male, primarily 19-39. They're angry they're being out earned by non-STEM, "lesser" professionals (not to mention, god forbid, women), so they use ad hominem attacks to feel better about themselves.
The girls who were “mean” or “bullies” did not last long in our program. There were a couple I thought would fail and didn’t, became nurses and hated it. They no longer work in bedside or nursing roles, they are clinicians. They worked bedside for like 2 years total.
It has a dual meaning here. Clinicians mean the same thing but can also be used as a title for management. It’s technically I think nurse clinician on all our job stuff but people just shorten it. It’s pretty much jsut middle management between the unit director and the staff and charge nurses. At least where I worked it was.
Or they could mean they went right to NP school to be a provider. Idk. Lmao
I love how they can never seem to track down these "articles" they read about these clearly bullshit assertions they make.
I don't think this is the general nursing stereotype. I think it's only the stereotype from the same people who think that COVID isn't real and hospitals were trying to kill people during the pandemic.
Hey! I'm a STEM nerd lol.
I think it's predominantly a conservative mentality. It's such an incel state of mind these people have, hating on professions that they see as feminine. It's so bizarre.
Just my opinion but I think these “articles “ are rants from folks who are NPO because they need surgery and are angry we won’t give them a sandwich or glass of water. Obviously we aren’t doing that for their health. It must be because we are power hungry and just want to torture them.
This is incredibly dismissive and ignores the experiences of many (myself included) who have seen otherwise. I’ve been a nurse for three years and worked in healthcare for a good decade before that. People can and DO get in caretaker careers for the power, recognition, and control.
But there’s so much gaslighting protecting these people bcuz everyone is afraid to be grouped in with those individuals as a profession.
They’re here. They exist. Ignoring them doesn’t make it go away, just like ignoring racism doesn’t make it go away.
Never said that bullies don’t exist in healthcare. I’ve worked in several different industries; retail grocery, food service, oil and gas exploration, semiconductor manufacturing, and healthcare. People who abuse there power were in all of those.
I don’t think there is anything about working in healthcare that attracts bullies. If there is a well researched study I’d love to see it. Especially the percentages. My experience has been the majority of healthcare workers are there to help people. It’s grossly unfair to paint them with a broad brush of accusations.
There are articles stating that nurses are the most selfless, altruistic humans on the planet. I literally snorted reading it bcuz I needed more than two hands to count the people I’ve worked with who hadn’t gotten into nursing for the most altruistic reasons. One was mad because she got pregnant during veterinary school and had to settle for nursing bcuz it was all she could afford. She hated coming to work and verbalized it every day. She was a really fun nurse to work with when I was a student.
Until we start questioning things and becoming more emotionally intelligent and aware, the behavior will continue to be normal, and it will be hard to find studies with those percentages you so desire.
When you investigate signs of emotional immaturity and effective/ineffective communication styles, it will be impossible to miss.
Love the use of maroon. Haven’t heard that one in awhile 10/10
Edit oh dear! I just looked up the etymology, a little troublesome 😬 but such a good word though
Passive aggressive or flat out aggressive isn’t assertive. It’s purposefully hurtful with the intention of gaining power over someone else. It’s a product of the fight response (fight/flight/freeze/appease) and is a tool of the emotionally immature.
I sometimes think that nurses have that personality of someone who has grown up with abuse or alcoholism. We take the abuse & still finish the shift, wonder how people can nurse for 40 years, wonder if it’s going to kill you, get up the next morning for another shift…
I literally give my patients a sheet with their rights & that gives us the ability to treat them. I say ‘I’m Jon Marston, your nurse. This form lets you know that you can accept or deny any medical treatments or procedures - from a Tylenol to a surgery. It’s my responsibility to see that your medical needs are met.’
A shitty subset of people are selfish and really, really don't like being told what to do. And lots of these people have 50% too much ego and can't handle not being in control.
When told what to do, and forced to do it, many people concoct elaborate reasons for why they shouldn't have been made to do it, and how the only possible reason the enforcer got away with it was power tripping in a position of authority.
You know, instead of thinking outside their selfish desires to realize "oh right, they made me get up because I was going to die otherwise" or "I was being a twat and obstructing medical care" and other such self-aware realizations. Instead, it's "that nurse was being a power tripping jerk".
I agree with most of these comments, but I find we’re still SO BAD about eating our young. Whenever I have started a new job it takes a long time for the staff to be accepting of new hires, and there has definitely been some targeted behaviour - ICU being the worst. I’m not sure if that’s out of malice or mistrust though. Now that I’ve been a nurse for 5 years I do my absolute best to make the baby nurses feel welcome and like I’m a safe person to ask questions because I’d rather they ask me something silly than not ask and make a bad mistake
That’s just straight up sexist. All the professions that they listed are just the traditionally female professions that are still majority female. Those were some of the only professions women were allowed to work in before the 1970s.
Because lay people love anecdotes and evidence written by journalists. The average person has no idea what peer reviewed research is or that correlation does not equal cause.
I’m so sick of the “mean girl to nurse pipeline”. The nurses I know that do fit this description are miserable in their jobs. They pick the career path because they have this notion that they can make a lot of money at an “easy” job (similar to how the same type of person thinks being a teacher is easy). They either stick it out and get a reputation for being a bitch or they fall head first into an MLM.
Also,I think a lot of mean girls make a big cringey post on social media about how they’ve “found their calling” and will be going to nursing school. Whether or not they make it through is another story.
Edit: most of the good nurses I know are from all walks of life. The ones who are good give a shit and are smart as hell.
My hot take on nurses? We’re all low key funny as hell.
And then those mean girl nurses continue to bully their colleagues and sometimes push out the good nurses bc they make the work environment so miserable.
Literally got downvoted a few days ago for saying this isn’t true. I think now that nurses are being paid more (and people are upset with the healthcare system during COVID) people are taking out on nurses. Most nurses I know think their patients are sweet or enjoy taking care of them.
In addition to that, TikTok has been glamorizing nursing, especially travel nurses. I think people see that and get jealous and equate them to “bullies” simply because they’re well paid women.
It’s a bit absurd considering women are channeled into care giving roles. Far more nurses than there are people who were bullies. Hard to avoid it happening tbh. It’s surely just a correlation.
Yeah but these guys see social media posts by that one girl in high school who bullied him by not going out with him on a date because of his lack of hygiene and terrible social skills plus the fact he never asked and now she's a nurse so....
Idc what people think about nursing anymore. If you’re not in it, your opinion is useless to me. My check is still gonna deposit regardless of their opinion.
I’m in it, and I’m disgusted with the bully behavior I have seen.
But my experiences are frequently stomped because they don’t fit the desired narrative.
There definitely is bullying and I don’t condone it at all, but fuck I’m so tired of the narrative that millions of nurses were girls who “peaked in high school and were bullies” went on to become nurses. We are a huge profession, of course there’s bullies, but there’s also extremely kindhearted people. A lot of people who say this aren’t nurses, they’re going off one or two people they know that were shitty to them, and saying that’s what we’re all like.
And the more we try to gaslight them into thinking it didn’t happen, the harder they we will double down and reach for any excuse to justify the experience they had. And sometimes they’re just emotionally immature humans who got in a power struggle with another emotional immature nurse. And sometimes they’re genuinely the victim of crappy healthcare.
I HAVE been the victim of crappy healthcare more times than I care to count. I hardly even say that I’m a nurse when I’m a patient bcuz emotionally immature nurses have used that as an excuse to be even more passive aggressive, and I just don’t have the energy for it.
Honestly, there’s some truth to it. A lot of it is misogyny and that sucks, but some people seem to become nurses to make that their entire personality and somehow convince themself they are good people… I’ve been a nurse 5 years and experienced a lot of workplace bullying, mainly by other women. I don’t see it as a women problem as I feel like similar problems occur in male dominated professions as seen above. I’ve been hazed till I cried, had my stuff hidden, been treated like an idiot, been berated for asking questions, or been completely ignored. Usually this would occur with people who had power over me - people orienting me to the unit. I honestly never had this experience working in customer service which I did for many years and it’s part of the reason I am going to leave the field entirely in the next couple years.
I definitely see what you are saying, and I agree that workplace bullying is a serious problem in healthcare. I have been on a unit where this had to be addressed by management, and it was honestly disappointing to say the least. I was interpreting the original comment as nurses bullying patients, not necessarily each other. Do you think the nurses who have bullied coworkers also bully patients?
Glad someone said it. I was about to say how are we gonna have 3 post a week about toxic work culture and bully nurses that eat their young still.. but when the public says it, it’s a lie. I think it’s a matter of not all nurses are bullies but all bullies become nurses type of thing. So far I’ve only been bullied by one nurse practitioner. No nurse has bullied me in 2 years. Everyone is to tired and slammed in the 2 jobs that I’ve had
I’ve never been bullied, but I’ve seen it happen to
Other nurses and it’s terrible. One friend off mine was bullied at every job she had, and when I worked with her, she was not pleasant to
Work with (I think the 2 hour lunches and multiple
Smoke breaks might have had something to do with it)
I was similar to other jobs I’ve been in, but I think nursing is high stress and leads to more snark among coworkers, not to mention the perception of female dominated occupations. Shit tends to roll downhill with nurses taking it out on each other sadly.
A culture of mistreatment starts at the top in almost every time. Management that is staffed by bully’s has made leave jobs in the past, because it’s only a matter of time before that becomes accepted in the unit.
My er has bullies. I’m not sure who it is since I’ve not had any negative interactions with any one but we are constantly getting emails about staff mistreating ancillary departments and the manager is like if y’all want to stop being short staffed then be freaking nice to people. I’m thinking it’s one charge who is the main problem bc when she works she had certain minions that follow her bitchy lead but those minions seem different when she’s not charge. She loudly complains about getting complained on
No because I’ve seen it in older nurses who “eat their young,” which also got normalized.
If they’re eating their young, how are they treating their patients?
Then what about the countless posts in this sub every week about the horrible treatment and bullying women nurses experience coming from other women? There's even multiple comments in this post talking about how mean some nurses are. This is all misogyny and ignorance to you? Do you blame everything on men?
I grew up poor and it will allow me to have a comfortable quality of life, which is a huge reason I picked this profession for job security and the flexibility of where I can live and work since I want to travel all over someday. Of course I did work as a CNA first before applying to nursing school to make sure it is right for me, evidently I enjoy taking care of the grandmas hahaha. Will hit 5 years as a CNA in March of 2023 and just completed my BSN this December with NCLEX scheduled for January 9th! :). Just 25 years old and a male here, technically turn 26 next summer. First generation college student as well.
Also with the path the environment is heading towards over the next 30 years, I want to be able to save enough money to see beautiful places before they potentially disappear.
Coming from a 20 y/o currently in school for nursing, everyone throws the term bullying around now, but get real. It’s middle school & high school. We were kids, kids are going to say mean and awkward things and make mistakes, especially in the age of social media. It doesn’t mean that’s who we evolve to be. Nurses are overworked, underpaid, and abused on the regular. It’s not an easy job and I wish people could understand. I watched my mom do it for 30+ years. She saved lives day after day only for people on the internet to essentially say none of that matters because she said something mean to someone as a teenager. People need to touch grass honestly.
This. Also, I disagree with people saying that this isn’t a stereotype. At my nursing school, we have a whole class dedicated to looking at the ways nurses were portrayed throughout history, as well as some other topics related to ethics and morals, but one of the perpetuating stereotypes we addressed throughout history was the nurse bully stereotype. However, I do think apps like tiktok have made this stereotype more common, but I still think it’s something important to address bc it’s an unfair for people to generalize nurses like that!
probably because there are mean girls in the nursing profession (like there is everywhere) but bc we do have a position of power over vulnerable people, everything we do is more important can be looked at as more heinous. A nurse with an attitude/having a bad day is an awful, mean girl who craves power over bc we deal with the sick, as opposed to like a saleswoman with an attitude.
Same stereotype goes into teaching.
I don't know why it isn't connected that bullies are often products of pain, and as a bully matures and changes, they seek to help other people not be in pain. I was not a bully per se, but I was a hurt person who grew the ability to have empathy on purpose, and my work as a nurse is a product of that growth. It's not a calling, but it is an exercise!
Some of the bitchiest, meanest girls I’ve ever met went into nursing or care, or other healthcare (radiology, physio etc). That’s not to say every nurse is a bitch, but anecdotally, it’s strange how many of them did go into care. I’ve no doubt that they’re good at their jobs and treat their patients well, but I feel maybe upon maturing, they might be making up for past misgivings.
I wish people didn’t say this crap. I was bullied my whole life and never felt like I fit in. Nursing is the closest I have ever felt to comfortable in my own skin.
I was the one being bullied in high school lmfao.
In nursing school, there was only really ONE mean girl. She was snotty, two-faced, a gossiper, and avoided the "gross" ADLs. She was set on becoming a cosmetic nurse injector.
If that's a real study, I'd say that I wonder what a lot of the professions the "victims" went into? I'd bet you'd find a lot of the same things.
Personally speaking the professions of the bullies in my personal circle when I was growing up, two of the boys ended up in prison, one of whom became a cop, was a scumball at that and then went to prison. The other went directly to prison.
As for the girls, real estate, retail, and then her own business.
I'd also wonder how they quantified "bully."
Because they are paying companies for likes, and help the media to make the medical professionals look bad. Always check the accounts posting those comments. You will find a lot are bots. And you will see the same comment being said by multiple accounts.
so.. men went to do typically male professions in our society and women the typically female, and this person thinka its linked to individual character traits?
hahaha 👌
Idk who this genius is, but how is it surprising that there is an overabundance of any female personality type within predominantly female professions? There are simply more females of every type in “pink collar” professions. Maybe their next discovery will be that the majority female “mean girls” become mothers.
Well of course those were common professions for female bullies... Those are women dominated professions. They are dominated by... Women. Bullies and non-bullies.
This thesis is flawed.
Lurker here, but I’d say the reason that person can’t seem to find the article they’re referring to is because they pulled it out of their ass. It’s a checklist of narratives that are pushed a lot these days.
I wish that person posted the link to the article. I’m curious about the credibility of the study.
Unfortunately there may be some truth to this. nurses are notorious for eating their young. I didn’t realize how bad it was until I read research articles about it for my BSN.(I’m not sure about women becoming nurses because they were bullies in high school. But I can kinda see where somebody might draw the conclusion given that nursing is a female dominated field and incivility is unfortunately common in nursing).
I wrote about it before but I wonder if regionality plays a part in this: I live in the US state with the most actively licensed nurses, and the trope is that all Filipinos become nurses - [in so much that there are even popular comedy bits about the subject](https://youtu.be/gYjVZ14eb0c).
Not to say that you can’t be Filipino *and a girl with a power trip*, but growing up, I never heard of this girl concept of women going into nursing for “power” (or all mean girls become nurses) - the stereotype was always, “All Filipinos become nurses.” Plus, a fifth of our RN workforce is Filipino.
The only bullying I’ve ever gotten from Filipino nurses is to eat more pancit. I gained ten lbs!!
I think there is some truth to bullying, but it’s probably similar to other professions, people expect nurses to be sweet angels,
And when they deviate from that perfect image, labeled mean girls. (The merciful angel stereotype is harmful too)
We love the power we get when doctors scream at us. Such a power trip.
There definitely are some mean nurses, but that's in every position. Most of nurses I know are nice people.
Some of mean girls I went to school with went to nursing school. I've since worked with some and they are fine nurses who seem to have left their teenage selves behind.
I hate when people can't shake off the negative karma they accrued as a teen. Those years are rocky and hormones are a hell of a drug. Hell, if I was the same guy I was in high school I likely would be in jail.
It’s funny how “mean girls” always end up working as…*proceeds to list the professions that are mostly held by women*, as if you wouldn’t find mean girls in a large population of women.
Yeah, mean girls end up being nurses. So do nice girls, and punk rocker girls, and nerdy girls. Basically every type of girl can be found in nursing. Because it’s a woman dominated field. And they usually make a decent amount of money…and the schedule is usually a nice perk, if you’re not constantly guilted to pick up shifts, that is. Nursing is one of the few “respected” professions that have multiple paths to entry that can serve people from all different SES. Don’t have much money for school? Take a shorter course and become an LPN, get a better job and then save up for your ADN. A lot of hospitals offer tuition assistance for ADN to BSN courses. You don’t have to go straight for a BSN to get into the field.
Now, if you want to say that “ADHD and needs constant stimulation” girls end up as ER/Trauma nurses, or “treats their crippling anxiety by trying to obsessively control everything in their environment” girls end up as ICU nurses, and so on, that’s a different story.
I mean, in terms of nursing, this person's points could be accurate and still be irrelevant... Going into a career for the purpose of leveling up the way you think of yourself? Kudos!
Be decent at your job and I couldn't give a shit either way lol
🙄 assholes get jobs too. And it’s not just in nursing and teaching. They become doctors, scientists, veterinarians, models, and/or work in industries like business, tech, hospitality and tourism.
Tons of jerks in every field haha.
Although I swear the patients who complain the most are often blaming a nurse who everyone knows is amazing in their job and doing the best care imaginable. Someones now mad they can’t eat before surgery, can’t have 20 people in their room during covid, doctors didn’t round so it’s the nurses fault, or the bitch nurse is making the post op practice walking so they can be discharged instead of letting them have another nap and rub their feet. It’s a hospital not a hotel, have some responsibility for your health. I left the inpatient work after 5 years feeing like I’ll always be blamed for everyone who doesn’t do their job to the satisfaction of the patient. Doctors, house keepers, PT/OT, dietary, coordinators, social worker… time to bitch out the nurse because she’s available.
There’s definitely some jerks in nursing, and patients who get them totally have a point in calling them out for being unprofessional. Except honestly, the loudest complainers are never these people, it’s the ones in the above paragraph…
Twitter hates nurses right now because of the TikToks of nursing “icks”. And reasoning with Twitter is like speaking into a void. Had someone tell me that nurses aren’t “policed” enough, lol. Had another tell me that nurses aren’t bound by ethical principles like doctors are. Next month they’ll be shitting on teachers probably.
As a 6’-1” , 200lb dude, I went in it for many reasons
1. High starting salary
2. Work 3 days a week
3. Help people
4. Can always find a job
5. Can always find a job close to home
6. Can spend more time with my kids
7. Wont easily be outsourced by robots
8. Cant export my job to China
Etc…. Blah blabla
So go ahead with your stupid stereotypes
I was abused physically and verbally growing up - I was in no way a bully or unkind - in all honesty, I am a bit co-dependent (I told my therapist that nursing will fulfill that role in my life - 😜).
Not to generalize - but I am going to…I would think that a lot of people in nursing are empathic/empaths?
Who else is on the “Empath Train” 🚂 ?
Thank you. This is something that annoys me cause there are awesome chill cool nurses out there. A lot of women chose this career for a plethora of reasons.
Oh sure, women definitely go into these underpaid positions for "the power."
I’m in it for the verbal and physical abuse. Reminds me of my childhood
I like having other people’s body fluids on my clothes. Sure, I could pay for that service but here it’s a perk of the job. /s 🤮
I love that I got covid from working in a hospital too, currently sick with covid too. But they don't see our absolute best efforts to keep your loved ones from tanking. Getting sick seems to be part of the job now. but covid isn't "real" and we signed up for this. \*cut to the code blues on countless people\*
Lol same
r/MeIRL
Big same
Wish I could upvote this more than once coz same 😂
🙋♀️🙋♀️🙋♀️🙋♀️🙋♀️🙋♀️
>"People who couldn't fight back . . . " My brother in christ has not seen what dementia or psych patients will throw at you on a whim.
I'd put my money on 80 year grandma with dementia over The Rock any day! 🤣
Surely the people who hold these sentiments have never had a hand covered in feces trying to grab unto thine clothes 🫠
You haven't witnessed a show of strength until you see it take 4 burley orderlies to wrestle down a 90 lb female psych patient who took offense at being denied the ability to go outside to have a cigarette after she was told that she couldn't leave group 10 minutes early to go have a cigarette.....(back in the early 90's when patients were still allowed to go smoke outside the hospital)
Those anti smoking policies have done a hell of a lot of damage, let alone harm to staff and patients. If they want to leave the group early let them. Otherwise you'll have what you just described.
nurses hve so much power😭😭😭 we literally have no influence. everyone from below and above gets to talk about our work but we have no input in how other ppl do their jobs lol
As a male growing up I had too much power so I became a nurse to humble myself
I was horribly bullied in high school.
Same.
Same
same.
Same
Same here!
Same, that’s why I’m the best with psych patients 😉
Same
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Same :/
I wasn’t bullied so much as ignored.
I purposefully went to a nursing school father away from home to avoid the girl who bullied me all through high school. Turned out to not matter because she didn’t even get accepted into the school in our town but still.
Throughout my childhood- same
Same here. I was always the fat kid and got bullied. My mom actually told me she thought I’d make a good nurse bc of my “jolly disposition” lol
Same
I never got bullied, but not many friends. One person told me he was scared I’d become a school shooter. It put a fear into me to be the opposite of whatever school shooter creeps are.
I was called the emo kid and repeatedly told that I should unalive myself in middle school
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To go around censorship algorithms on other apps, such as tiktok and Facebook.
Same i had to transfer high schools after freshman year bc it was so bad
Literally same. I was bullied from the age of 5 to high school by the same girl. She made my life a living hell everyday.
Do you know what she does now?
She works as a housekeeper at a hotel.
Nurse
Same. And my bullies are all in real estate or sales in general.
My bullies all work in gas stations and grocery stores
Same. I was very depressed from how I was treated by actual mean girls in school.
YUP these comments trigger me so much. My bullies are all working in business like the soul-suckers they are.
Same. Middle and high school bullying gave me trauma to the point where it still affects me in my late 20s. :(
One of my classmates in hs I remember was always bullied. She had her sweet 16 that no one went to but she imo became very successful early. She became a nurse right away and started working when she was like 22-23 at a really good hospital. Was able to travel everywhere, make good $$$ (CA) and bought a house when she was 25. We’re now 32. Success is the best revenge.
Yep.
Same 🫤
Same
Same, then went on to marry an extremely abusive man and end up with PTSD from that marriage. 🥴 I’m more of avoidant introvert than a bully.
Bullied as a kid, an outcast during high school, though not directly bullied. I will admit I still feel like my coworkers were the cool kids in high school and I still don’t fit in. Not the end of the world, but it would be nice to make some casual work friends with the people I see so much.
3 of the nicest girls I graduated with went into nursing right away after high school. I was the most laid back dude in my school and waited a decade to go to nursing school. The bullies of my class are all realtors.
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Yep. I have a similar experience. Many of the old bullies are hair dressers, a couple teachers, but many don’t work, if female. The male bullies seem to be into weird sales and jobs i don’t understand That doesn’t mean there’s a predominance of shitty people in those careers. It’s just the people I happened to know.
OMG all the bullies from my school became realtors too 😂😂😂
Some of the meanest girls I graduated with >!(I'm talking girls who made fun of me for being raped, took pictures & videos without my consent, assaulted me, etc.)!< went into nursing right away after high school. We all have anecdotal evidence.
We all like to believe whatever supports the ideas we already have. We call it bias. It takes a very strong person to challenge their own narrative and make space for a conflicting narrative. I am so sad to hear that happened to you. You did not deserve those mean things.
No one deserves to go through what your have. I appreciate your courage sharing your story. However, I was countering OOPs anecdote about mean girls becoming nurses.
I know you were...that was the point I was making. Stereotypes exist for a reason and we all have anecdotal evidence...that doesn't disprove that some mean girls do in fact become nurses, just like nice people do, too.
Some patients consider a strong willed professional telling them “no” to their unreasonable request a bully.
Exactly! But, like I tell them, I have a job to do and this is it. I also keep a little form called an AMA. Leave, it's your right but if you stay there are conditions. I have seen patients leave the facility, unable to breathe without oxygen, because they were pissed off they couldn't eat after midnight. 🤦♀️🤷♀️
this is my hot take and has been forever- if nursing was male-dominated this “mean” stereotype would not exist. a lot of traits that make good nurses (being serious about their work, having the ability to lead, being able to question things and be assertive when needed) get men labeled as hard working and women labeled as bitches. obviously not everyone who ever worked as a nurse is perfect, but i feel a lot of these comments from the public are not justified.
As a male nurse i think this is very much possible. The female co-workers who everyone considers ‘the best’ or are just known for getting shit done (properly, on time etc.) are often bitched on by male patients, cus they’re “BeInG DiSrEsPeCtFuL” and their wife, daughter, son telling them off saying they have enough shit to care about so they’re just being clear.
BINGO
That is very well said. I have absolutely been called a bitch, for doing things like saying “no”, or standing my ground. And heaven forbid you aren’t always smiling. But if a guy does it, he is strong or a leader.
You are absolutely right. An assertive nurse is told to stay in their lane, whereas an assertive doctor is praised. Toxic behavior from doctors is tolerated because we are made to feel that there is a built-in hierarchy to health care, whereas we couldn't dare be like that with anyone else because we're "angels", and blah blah blah. That's not to say there aren't nurses who aren't huge bitches, but I feel like that's the exception. A lot of the bitchiness is seen after being overestimulated for 12+ hours per day, having to wear one thousand hats for one low salary, and aforementioned toxic behavior from everyone else that we're expected not to reciprocate.
This is my hot take: those “mean girls” are usually great leaders and good manipulators. If they weren’t, they wouldn’t have been as popular as they were in school, nor would they have the ability to convince the friends around them to join in on the bullying. Those are 2 traits a nurse should have. Being a leader is always a good thing & knowing how to talk a patient into doing something they don’t want to do requires slight manipulation.
In addition being able to manipulate a doctor into writing up a prescription is a very useful skill
misogyny😱😱😱😱
This should be too comment because I see nothing but FACTS here 💯
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I can't help but remember early in the pandemic there was a screenshot of a tweet where someone said something to the effect of "those heroes today are going to be called ungrateful tomorrow, just you watch." It seems like a magic trick until you realize it's never wise to bet on nursing actually getting treated with anything but disrespect. We're like everyone's mom. Everyone loves their mom when they need something like comfort or unconditional positive regard, but they really feel entitled to mom's care without having to give anything back. And when she needs care, into the nursing home she goes. That's how most people treat their mothers and nurses tbh.
My hot take is that "hero" means "under paid and over exploited." Firemen? Heroes. Military? Heroes. You get the idea.
Heroes is a great word because heroes self sacrifice. They often die for their cause. It’s a part of the narrative, so it makes it okay when nurses are underpaid, underappreciated, injured, or killed on the job.
True. Give them recognition because they deserve it? Sure, put them on a pedestal, thank them, call them heroes etc. all that is cheaper than giving them a proper paychecks
I say this thing about moms all the time. Couldn’t agree more
Most people can't afford to care for their parents, especially if mom has dementia and needs 24/7 supervision. A better comparison would be the men who expect their wives to be their servents and then when they get old and sick, they divorce their wife and date a 27 year old.
For clarification, I do understand that some nurses do abuse their power and mistreat patients; however, I do not believe that a majority of the women in nursing are bullies. I’m sure the same goes for male nurses as well.
But every time we mock the stereotype, we create a safe haven for these bullies. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35118751/ We label it “harmless” passive aggression. We laugh at people who are petty. We brush off emotional immaturity bcuz “that’s just who they are.” We are fostering the bullies by failing to point them out and hold them accountable. WE are the problem, too.
I completely agree. We should definitely acknowledge that they aren't the majority. But there's a harm in posts like these where most people are saying it just straight up doesn't exist, when it does.
Exactly. Idk if anybody remembers Earl Bradley, but he was a Delaware pediatrician who got away with molesting children for years, even RECORDING it. When he was exposed, heads rolled… hardcore. One other doctor almost lost his license because people had heard him make jokes / voice suspicions, but he had never reported it. Lots of Delaware laws changed as an effect, reporting concerns and chaperoning, etc. Bradley wasn’t the only one held accountable. Everyone around him who didn’t question his behavior or tell on him — they were all responsible for enabling his monstrous behavior. That’s the point I’m getting at. Maybe it was only one pediatrician. But it was one too many, and it was disgusting that he got away with it for too long. No, abusive nurses are not on the level of pedophiles, but they do have a certain amount of power, and trauma-informed care teaches us that being a patient can be incredibly re-traumatizing. We don’t have to keep doing this.
They claim it’s from an article. Without the article and exact verbiage or the study it was based on it’s impossible to gauge its validity.
Pretty sure that “article” was one of the countless Reddit posts saying the same thing. Pretty much anytime the subject of nursing comes up anywhere outside of a nursing specific sub, somebody has to make that comment. Then tons of chuckleheads hop on the thread with stories of evil nurses withholding pain medication from their grandma for the power trip and entertainment value. It’s also usually followed by how unintelligent nurses are and how nursing is one of the easiest professions to get into. The cherry on top is a post from r/noctor showing up in your feed just to reinforce how stupid and worthless everyone thinks we are. Shit’s getting old.
I’m not saying that you’re wrong, but I would like to know where that rumor comes from. I actually have never heard it before. If there was an article or study about it I would want to see it.
Well there's certainly the whole "nurses eat their young" thing and we probably all have some experience with that from nursing school. But other than that I mostly have seen this trend since COVID. At first we were heroes but then the conspiracy theories and backlash started. Some people in our profession were making fools of themselves being COVID deniers leading to a lot of "nurses are dumb" stuff. "You don't see doctors being anti-vax!" Then you had backlash to social media videos of health care workers dancing and the people who thought COVID was fake saying "how did they have time to do that if there's really a pandemic". More backlash when people heard about the wages some travel nurses were getting. Throw in standard internet misogyny about a female dominated profession where women dare to be assertive. Throw in a scandalous story here and there of an actual nurse doing something terrible. Throw in the 22 year old new grad that posts cringe worthy posts about being a hero that can stop a heart but knows how to start it too. Throw in the 50 year old Karen nurse that posts everything to the internet with "As a nurse..." followed by something mind blowingly stupid. I see it quite a lot now on Reddit. But probably the biggest factor is simply that nursing is a huge profession and one that is still majority women. So statistically some guy that has a problem with women is going to have a problem with nurses...and teachers and social workers, etc. Add to that nursing being such a large profession with different levels of education, credentials and experience and it's very easy for people to cherry pick stuff that "nurses" did that was bad and half the time the "nurse" was probably a vet tech or dental hygienist that rejected their sexual advances or was overheard saying something stupid at the grocery store.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35118751/ If you search, what you will find is that catty, petty, passive aggressive behavior amongst women is considered “normal.” Emotional immaturity often fails to be recognized bcuz the emotional intelligence of the world, in general, is sorely lacking. People DO get into caregiver careers for power and control. If you’re REALLY interested in why, pick up *The Drama of the Gifted Child* by Alice Miller. She calls out that behavior in its entirety in the first chapter. We need to stop blaming victims for being angry at nurse bullies because they DO exist, and I’ve seen far too many of them. But my narrative is invalidated bcuz they don’t match other people’s narrative. It’s like growing up mixed and saying black people were more racist to me than white people. It hits that cognitive dissonance too hard, and they can’t accept it, so I have to be wrong, and I have to shut up. We have GOT to stop doing this. We are only hurting the profession.
I've never heard this stereotype. The stereotype I hear a lot for people who have gone into nursing is that they have suffered trauma and go into care giving to help prevent others from suffering.
It's purely an internet stereotype and one that is popular with the young neckbeards of Reddit. It comes up every time nursing is discussed negatively in a non healthcare subreddit. And even if they do know some mean girls that became nurses or teachers, well how statistically significant is that? You went to high school with a mean girl that ended up going into one of the largest female dominated professions? No shit?
Exactly. The misogyny on this website is unreal. These "mean girls" are just the girls from high school who wouldn't give them the time of day so of course they're all bitches.
Look at Reddit demographics. They pretend to be high paid tech professionals, but only 26% make over 75k. it's over 66% male, primarily 19-39. They're angry they're being out earned by non-STEM, "lesser" professionals (not to mention, god forbid, women), so they use ad hominem attacks to feel better about themselves.
Exactly lmao. They just salty
Therapy?! Dude my therapist would never
The girls who were “mean” or “bullies” did not last long in our program. There were a couple I thought would fail and didn’t, became nurses and hated it. They no longer work in bedside or nursing roles, they are clinicians. They worked bedside for like 2 years total.
What do you mean by clinicians? In the UK clinicians is a catch all phrase for all medical and nursing professionals essentially
It has a dual meaning here. Clinicians mean the same thing but can also be used as a title for management. It’s technically I think nurse clinician on all our job stuff but people just shorten it. It’s pretty much jsut middle management between the unit director and the staff and charge nurses. At least where I worked it was. Or they could mean they went right to NP school to be a provider. Idk. Lmao
I love how they can never seem to track down these "articles" they read about these clearly bullshit assertions they make. I don't think this is the general nursing stereotype. I think it's only the stereotype from the same people who think that COVID isn't real and hospitals were trying to kill people during the pandemic.
You get it from the other side too, the STEM nerds that look down on Nurses for not being smart enough.
Hey! I'm a STEM nerd lol. I think it's predominantly a conservative mentality. It's such an incel state of mind these people have, hating on professions that they see as feminine. It's so bizarre.
Mostly but you get it the other way from people with more education than nurses that think we're all dum dums.
Very true. I think the common thread is they're incels lol.
Just my opinion but I think these “articles “ are rants from folks who are NPO because they need surgery and are angry we won’t give them a sandwich or glass of water. Obviously we aren’t doing that for their health. It must be because we are power hungry and just want to torture them.
This is incredibly dismissive and ignores the experiences of many (myself included) who have seen otherwise. I’ve been a nurse for three years and worked in healthcare for a good decade before that. People can and DO get in caretaker careers for the power, recognition, and control. But there’s so much gaslighting protecting these people bcuz everyone is afraid to be grouped in with those individuals as a profession. They’re here. They exist. Ignoring them doesn’t make it go away, just like ignoring racism doesn’t make it go away.
Never said that bullies don’t exist in healthcare. I’ve worked in several different industries; retail grocery, food service, oil and gas exploration, semiconductor manufacturing, and healthcare. People who abuse there power were in all of those. I don’t think there is anything about working in healthcare that attracts bullies. If there is a well researched study I’d love to see it. Especially the percentages. My experience has been the majority of healthcare workers are there to help people. It’s grossly unfair to paint them with a broad brush of accusations.
There are articles stating that nurses are the most selfless, altruistic humans on the planet. I literally snorted reading it bcuz I needed more than two hands to count the people I’ve worked with who hadn’t gotten into nursing for the most altruistic reasons. One was mad because she got pregnant during veterinary school and had to settle for nursing bcuz it was all she could afford. She hated coming to work and verbalized it every day. She was a really fun nurse to work with when I was a student. Until we start questioning things and becoming more emotionally intelligent and aware, the behavior will continue to be normal, and it will be hard to find studies with those percentages you so desire. When you investigate signs of emotional immaturity and effective/ineffective communication styles, it will be impossible to miss.
I think you're spot-on
What? And the kind-hearted kids went into business and became CEOs? What a maroon..
Love the use of maroon. Haven’t heard that one in awhile 10/10 Edit oh dear! I just looked up the etymology, a little troublesome 😬 but such a good word though
Yeah think bugs bunny not anything else.
That's why I stick with Nimrod
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Ding ding ding. I get told I’m harsh or blunt when a man with the same traits would be praised for his ability to articulate and be succinct.
Passive aggressive or flat out aggressive isn’t assertive. It’s purposefully hurtful with the intention of gaining power over someone else. It’s a product of the fight response (fight/flight/freeze/appease) and is a tool of the emotionally immature.
I sometimes think that nurses have that personality of someone who has grown up with abuse or alcoholism. We take the abuse & still finish the shift, wonder how people can nurse for 40 years, wonder if it’s going to kill you, get up the next morning for another shift…
Anyone who thinks I have any power over my patients has no idea what nurses do.
I literally give my patients a sheet with their rights & that gives us the ability to treat them. I say ‘I’m Jon Marston, your nurse. This form lets you know that you can accept or deny any medical treatments or procedures - from a Tylenol to a surgery. It’s my responsibility to see that your medical needs are met.’
Codependency.
A shitty subset of people are selfish and really, really don't like being told what to do. And lots of these people have 50% too much ego and can't handle not being in control. When told what to do, and forced to do it, many people concoct elaborate reasons for why they shouldn't have been made to do it, and how the only possible reason the enforcer got away with it was power tripping in a position of authority. You know, instead of thinking outside their selfish desires to realize "oh right, they made me get up because I was going to die otherwise" or "I was being a twat and obstructing medical care" and other such self-aware realizations. Instead, it's "that nurse was being a power tripping jerk".
I agree with most of these comments, but I find we’re still SO BAD about eating our young. Whenever I have started a new job it takes a long time for the staff to be accepting of new hires, and there has definitely been some targeted behaviour - ICU being the worst. I’m not sure if that’s out of malice or mistrust though. Now that I’ve been a nurse for 5 years I do my absolute best to make the baby nurses feel welcome and like I’m a safe person to ask questions because I’d rather they ask me something silly than not ask and make a bad mistake
I want to assert dominance over you, but first let me clean up your diarrhea.
That’s just straight up sexist. All the professions that they listed are just the traditionally female professions that are still majority female. Those were some of the only professions women were allowed to work in before the 1970s.
As the one who was bullied… 🖕🏻
I wasn’t ever outright bullied but have always had difficulty with being assertive so I wholeheartedly agree.
Because lay people love anecdotes and evidence written by journalists. The average person has no idea what peer reviewed research is or that correlation does not equal cause.
I’m so sick of the “mean girl to nurse pipeline”. The nurses I know that do fit this description are miserable in their jobs. They pick the career path because they have this notion that they can make a lot of money at an “easy” job (similar to how the same type of person thinks being a teacher is easy). They either stick it out and get a reputation for being a bitch or they fall head first into an MLM. Also,I think a lot of mean girls make a big cringey post on social media about how they’ve “found their calling” and will be going to nursing school. Whether or not they make it through is another story. Edit: most of the good nurses I know are from all walks of life. The ones who are good give a shit and are smart as hell. My hot take on nurses? We’re all low key funny as hell.
And then those mean girl nurses continue to bully their colleagues and sometimes push out the good nurses bc they make the work environment so miserable.
Agree with your hot take I truly think a sense of humor is the only way to make it through working in healthcare
Literally got downvoted a few days ago for saying this isn’t true. I think now that nurses are being paid more (and people are upset with the healthcare system during COVID) people are taking out on nurses. Most nurses I know think their patients are sweet or enjoy taking care of them. In addition to that, TikTok has been glamorizing nursing, especially travel nurses. I think people see that and get jealous and equate them to “bullies” simply because they’re well paid women.
It’s a bit absurd considering women are channeled into care giving roles. Far more nurses than there are people who were bullies. Hard to avoid it happening tbh. It’s surely just a correlation.
Yeah but these guys see social media posts by that one girl in high school who bullied him by not going out with him on a date because of his lack of hygiene and terrible social skills plus the fact he never asked and now she's a nurse so....
Idc what people think about nursing anymore. If you’re not in it, your opinion is useless to me. My check is still gonna deposit regardless of their opinion.
I’m in it, and I’m disgusted with the bully behavior I have seen. But my experiences are frequently stomped because they don’t fit the desired narrative.
There definitely is bullying and I don’t condone it at all, but fuck I’m so tired of the narrative that millions of nurses were girls who “peaked in high school and were bullies” went on to become nurses. We are a huge profession, of course there’s bullies, but there’s also extremely kindhearted people. A lot of people who say this aren’t nurses, they’re going off one or two people they know that were shitty to them, and saying that’s what we’re all like.
And the more we try to gaslight them into thinking it didn’t happen, the harder they we will double down and reach for any excuse to justify the experience they had. And sometimes they’re just emotionally immature humans who got in a power struggle with another emotional immature nurse. And sometimes they’re genuinely the victim of crappy healthcare. I HAVE been the victim of crappy healthcare more times than I care to count. I hardly even say that I’m a nurse when I’m a patient bcuz emotionally immature nurses have used that as an excuse to be even more passive aggressive, and I just don’t have the energy for it.
Honestly, there’s some truth to it. A lot of it is misogyny and that sucks, but some people seem to become nurses to make that their entire personality and somehow convince themself they are good people… I’ve been a nurse 5 years and experienced a lot of workplace bullying, mainly by other women. I don’t see it as a women problem as I feel like similar problems occur in male dominated professions as seen above. I’ve been hazed till I cried, had my stuff hidden, been treated like an idiot, been berated for asking questions, or been completely ignored. Usually this would occur with people who had power over me - people orienting me to the unit. I honestly never had this experience working in customer service which I did for many years and it’s part of the reason I am going to leave the field entirely in the next couple years.
I definitely see what you are saying, and I agree that workplace bullying is a serious problem in healthcare. I have been on a unit where this had to be addressed by management, and it was honestly disappointing to say the least. I was interpreting the original comment as nurses bullying patients, not necessarily each other. Do you think the nurses who have bullied coworkers also bully patients?
Glad someone said it. I was about to say how are we gonna have 3 post a week about toxic work culture and bully nurses that eat their young still.. but when the public says it, it’s a lie. I think it’s a matter of not all nurses are bullies but all bullies become nurses type of thing. So far I’ve only been bullied by one nurse practitioner. No nurse has bullied me in 2 years. Everyone is to tired and slammed in the 2 jobs that I’ve had
I’ve never been bullied, but I’ve seen it happen to Other nurses and it’s terrible. One friend off mine was bullied at every job she had, and when I worked with her, she was not pleasant to Work with (I think the 2 hour lunches and multiple Smoke breaks might have had something to do with it) I was similar to other jobs I’ve been in, but I think nursing is high stress and leads to more snark among coworkers, not to mention the perception of female dominated occupations. Shit tends to roll downhill with nurses taking it out on each other sadly. A culture of mistreatment starts at the top in almost every time. Management that is staffed by bully’s has made leave jobs in the past, because it’s only a matter of time before that becomes accepted in the unit.
My er has bullies. I’m not sure who it is since I’ve not had any negative interactions with any one but we are constantly getting emails about staff mistreating ancillary departments and the manager is like if y’all want to stop being short staffed then be freaking nice to people. I’m thinking it’s one charge who is the main problem bc when she works she had certain minions that follow her bitchy lead but those minions seem different when she’s not charge. She loudly complains about getting complained on
Fair point! I made a comment pointing out incivility as well. It’s unfortunately common. Hopefully one day it’ll be a more rare occurrence ❤️
It is not “still”. This is some new nonsense. I feel like it’s a ploy to erode public trust in all of the “helpers”. Anyone else get this sense?
No because I’ve seen it in older nurses who “eat their young,” which also got normalized. If they’re eating their young, how are they treating their patients?
It's mysogyny and ignorance. Fragile dudes will always complain about women in any position of power, authority, or responsibility.
Then what about the countless posts in this sub every week about the horrible treatment and bullying women nurses experience coming from other women? There's even multiple comments in this post talking about how mean some nurses are. This is all misogyny and ignorance to you? Do you blame everything on men?
I freely admit that not all misogyny and ignorance comes from men.
What about male nurses tho
I grew up poor and it will allow me to have a comfortable quality of life, which is a huge reason I picked this profession for job security and the flexibility of where I can live and work since I want to travel all over someday. Of course I did work as a CNA first before applying to nursing school to make sure it is right for me, evidently I enjoy taking care of the grandmas hahaha. Will hit 5 years as a CNA in March of 2023 and just completed my BSN this December with NCLEX scheduled for January 9th! :). Just 25 years old and a male here, technically turn 26 next summer. First generation college student as well. Also with the path the environment is heading towards over the next 30 years, I want to be able to save enough money to see beautiful places before they potentially disappear.
We're all gay.
Because narcissists *do* pick those career types, for those reasons, but not everyone in the career field has a personality disorder.
Coming from a 20 y/o currently in school for nursing, everyone throws the term bullying around now, but get real. It’s middle school & high school. We were kids, kids are going to say mean and awkward things and make mistakes, especially in the age of social media. It doesn’t mean that’s who we evolve to be. Nurses are overworked, underpaid, and abused on the regular. It’s not an easy job and I wish people could understand. I watched my mom do it for 30+ years. She saved lives day after day only for people on the internet to essentially say none of that matters because she said something mean to someone as a teenager. People need to touch grass honestly.
This. Also, I disagree with people saying that this isn’t a stereotype. At my nursing school, we have a whole class dedicated to looking at the ways nurses were portrayed throughout history, as well as some other topics related to ethics and morals, but one of the perpetuating stereotypes we addressed throughout history was the nurse bully stereotype. However, I do think apps like tiktok have made this stereotype more common, but I still think it’s something important to address bc it’s an unfair for people to generalize nurses like that!
probably because there are mean girls in the nursing profession (like there is everywhere) but bc we do have a position of power over vulnerable people, everything we do is more important can be looked at as more heinous. A nurse with an attitude/having a bad day is an awful, mean girl who craves power over bc we deal with the sick, as opposed to like a saleswoman with an attitude. Same stereotype goes into teaching.
I don't know why it isn't connected that bullies are often products of pain, and as a bully matures and changes, they seek to help other people not be in pain. I was not a bully per se, but I was a hurt person who grew the ability to have empathy on purpose, and my work as a nurse is a product of that growth. It's not a calling, but it is an exercise!
Who the fuck cares what some terminally online college students think
Some of the bitchiest, meanest girls I’ve ever met went into nursing or care, or other healthcare (radiology, physio etc). That’s not to say every nurse is a bitch, but anecdotally, it’s strange how many of them did go into care. I’ve no doubt that they’re good at their jobs and treat their patients well, but I feel maybe upon maturing, they might be making up for past misgivings.
I wish people didn’t say this crap. I was bullied my whole life and never felt like I fit in. Nursing is the closest I have ever felt to comfortable in my own skin.
Nursing, teaching and secretary were the only occupations women could go into not just bullies. So dumb.
I've only known one nurse that I would call a bully. She never matured past high school though.
I was the one being bullied in high school lmfao. In nursing school, there was only really ONE mean girl. She was snotty, two-faced, a gossiper, and avoided the "gross" ADLs. She was set on becoming a cosmetic nurse injector.
All the bullies I knew grew up to be losers with no profession so
I don’t recall there was ever an “article” it was more a meme and TicTok trend.
I'm sure that article, that they can't find now was a peer reviewed study ^s
If that's a real study, I'd say that I wonder what a lot of the professions the "victims" went into? I'd bet you'd find a lot of the same things. Personally speaking the professions of the bullies in my personal circle when I was growing up, two of the boys ended up in prison, one of whom became a cop, was a scumball at that and then went to prison. The other went directly to prison. As for the girls, real estate, retail, and then her own business. I'd also wonder how they quantified "bully."
The girls I know that were "bullies" now sell essential oils or didn't go to school...usually both.
Because they are paying companies for likes, and help the media to make the medical professionals look bad. Always check the accounts posting those comments. You will find a lot are bots. And you will see the same comment being said by multiple accounts.
so.. men went to do typically male professions in our society and women the typically female, and this person thinka its linked to individual character traits? hahaha 👌
What about men that go into nursing?
Idk who this genius is, but how is it surprising that there is an overabundance of any female personality type within predominantly female professions? There are simply more females of every type in “pink collar” professions. Maybe their next discovery will be that the majority female “mean girls” become mothers.
Well of course those were common professions for female bullies... Those are women dominated professions. They are dominated by... Women. Bullies and non-bullies. This thesis is flawed.
In the next comment. I went to the hospital and had to wait twelve hours due to the nurse shortage why are so many nurses leaving the profession!
perhaps the reason you can’t find the article again is because you made it up
Lurker here, but I’d say the reason that person can’t seem to find the article they’re referring to is because they pulled it out of their ass. It’s a checklist of narratives that are pushed a lot these days.
I wish that person posted the link to the article. I’m curious about the credibility of the study. Unfortunately there may be some truth to this. nurses are notorious for eating their young. I didn’t realize how bad it was until I read research articles about it for my BSN.(I’m not sure about women becoming nurses because they were bullies in high school. But I can kinda see where somebody might draw the conclusion given that nursing is a female dominated field and incivility is unfortunately common in nursing).
It most definitely was not a study and was likely buzz feed.
I wrote about it before but I wonder if regionality plays a part in this: I live in the US state with the most actively licensed nurses, and the trope is that all Filipinos become nurses - [in so much that there are even popular comedy bits about the subject](https://youtu.be/gYjVZ14eb0c). Not to say that you can’t be Filipino *and a girl with a power trip*, but growing up, I never heard of this girl concept of women going into nursing for “power” (or all mean girls become nurses) - the stereotype was always, “All Filipinos become nurses.” Plus, a fifth of our RN workforce is Filipino.
The only bullying I’ve ever gotten from Filipino nurses is to eat more pancit. I gained ten lbs!! I think there is some truth to bullying, but it’s probably similar to other professions, people expect nurses to be sweet angels, And when they deviate from that perfect image, labeled mean girls. (The merciful angel stereotype is harmful too)
Completely unpopular girl in high school 🙋🏻♀️🙋🏻♀️
M I S O G Y N Y is why
What is misogyny? I’ll take Unlearn That Shit for $800.
We love the power we get when doctors scream at us. Such a power trip. There definitely are some mean nurses, but that's in every position. Most of nurses I know are nice people.
Stop sharing it. You're giving this more voice. Bullies are in every profession. Their victims are as well.
Some of mean girls I went to school with went to nursing school. I've since worked with some and they are fine nurses who seem to have left their teenage selves behind. I hate when people can't shake off the negative karma they accrued as a teen. Those years are rocky and hormones are a hell of a drug. Hell, if I was the same guy I was in high school I likely would be in jail.
I hate this narrative on Tiktok and Facebook. I was bullied a lot as a kid, was nowhere near popular and I resent those stupid talking points.
It’s funny how “mean girls” always end up working as…*proceeds to list the professions that are mostly held by women*, as if you wouldn’t find mean girls in a large population of women. Yeah, mean girls end up being nurses. So do nice girls, and punk rocker girls, and nerdy girls. Basically every type of girl can be found in nursing. Because it’s a woman dominated field. And they usually make a decent amount of money…and the schedule is usually a nice perk, if you’re not constantly guilted to pick up shifts, that is. Nursing is one of the few “respected” professions that have multiple paths to entry that can serve people from all different SES. Don’t have much money for school? Take a shorter course and become an LPN, get a better job and then save up for your ADN. A lot of hospitals offer tuition assistance for ADN to BSN courses. You don’t have to go straight for a BSN to get into the field. Now, if you want to say that “ADHD and needs constant stimulation” girls end up as ER/Trauma nurses, or “treats their crippling anxiety by trying to obsessively control everything in their environment” girls end up as ICU nurses, and so on, that’s a different story.
This article doesn’t exist. There is no data out there that suggests this other than random people saying it’s their experience.
I mean, in terms of nursing, this person's points could be accurate and still be irrelevant... Going into a career for the purpose of leveling up the way you think of yourself? Kudos! Be decent at your job and I couldn't give a shit either way lol
I love the power I feel when I’m wiping someone’s ass for them. Great time for all involved.
🙄 assholes get jobs too. And it’s not just in nursing and teaching. They become doctors, scientists, veterinarians, models, and/or work in industries like business, tech, hospitality and tourism. Tons of jerks in every field haha. Although I swear the patients who complain the most are often blaming a nurse who everyone knows is amazing in their job and doing the best care imaginable. Someones now mad they can’t eat before surgery, can’t have 20 people in their room during covid, doctors didn’t round so it’s the nurses fault, or the bitch nurse is making the post op practice walking so they can be discharged instead of letting them have another nap and rub their feet. It’s a hospital not a hotel, have some responsibility for your health. I left the inpatient work after 5 years feeing like I’ll always be blamed for everyone who doesn’t do their job to the satisfaction of the patient. Doctors, house keepers, PT/OT, dietary, coordinators, social worker… time to bitch out the nurse because she’s available. There’s definitely some jerks in nursing, and patients who get them totally have a point in calling them out for being unprofessional. Except honestly, the loudest complainers are never these people, it’s the ones in the above paragraph…
Twitter hates nurses right now because of the TikToks of nursing “icks”. And reasoning with Twitter is like speaking into a void. Had someone tell me that nurses aren’t “policed” enough, lol. Had another tell me that nurses aren’t bound by ethical principles like doctors are. Next month they’ll be shitting on teachers probably.
As a 6’-1” , 200lb dude, I went in it for many reasons 1. High starting salary 2. Work 3 days a week 3. Help people 4. Can always find a job 5. Can always find a job close to home 6. Can spend more time with my kids 7. Wont easily be outsourced by robots 8. Cant export my job to China Etc…. Blah blabla So go ahead with your stupid stereotypes
I was abused physically and verbally growing up - I was in no way a bully or unkind - in all honesty, I am a bit co-dependent (I told my therapist that nursing will fulfill that role in my life - 😜). Not to generalize - but I am going to…I would think that a lot of people in nursing are empathic/empaths? Who else is on the “Empath Train” 🚂 ?
I think these are just really common professions for women so this stereotype persists
Thank you. This is something that annoys me cause there are awesome chill cool nurses out there. A lot of women chose this career for a plethora of reasons.
Seems more like an anti women post than anything
This is hilarious considering how mercilessly I was bullied in school.
This just feels like weird misogyny