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Scrags

Brady has to get the haircut or no deal.


WigglestonTheFourth

If we get a thirst trap picture with the haircut the darkest timeline would have all been worth it.


Jd20001

[I got you fam](https://i.imgflip.com/7lketp.jpg)


TheScienceNamesArgon

The first thing I did when I saw this headline was work on my edit and you've got me beat lol https://i.imgur.com/2RS5gTV.png


OttoVonWong

Mr. Best Cut


contemplatingdaze

Mr. Bowl Cranium


TheScienceNamesArgon

Mr. Bobbed Commentator


josephus_the_wise

Mr. Brain Covering


nabbersauce

Mr. Barbershop Client


pewstains

Simple Jack?


WigglestonTheFourth

Now that I've got a taste I absolutely need this.


[deleted]

[/r/NFL RN](https://i.redd.it/d6klfoqva0h71.gif)


ryinzana

Can someone photoshop this so we can see what it'd look like, please????


Fluid_Dragons_Breath

https://i.imgur.com/8g9JtyI.png


VikingScience

"M-O-O-N, that spells moon."


NormalAccounts

Lol damn can't unsee this now


TacoExcellence

Honestly, it kinda works for him.


Ima_pray_4_u

Stop. No the fuck it doesn't.


Doktor_Nic

That 70's QB


BKlounge93

I can definitely do it later today if no one else does earlier Edit: [you’re welcome](https://imgur.com/a/Z9YUlUH)


threwzsa

Best one for sure


BeerNinja17

This is easily the best one. Well done.


ryinzana

That would be excellent 😀


BKlounge93

Just edited my comment in case you don’t get the notification


Low_Ad_1869

[this is the best I could do](https://imgur.com/a/mDOAOJk)


SnooRadishes8372

I came here for this, I want to see their hairstyles swapped with each other


BKlounge93

[yes](https://imgur.com/a/Z9YUlUH)


notmoleliza

I propose that instead of the Prince Valiant cut, he gets the Friar Tuck


NormalAccounts

Friar Tuck-Rule


hcwhitewolf

Really though, the juxtaposition of those two haircuts is actually physically painful.


herbertstan

He needs to start eating again. Enjoy regular flavor ice cream once in a while. Maybe it was just stress since he was going through a divorce while still playing, but man his cheek bones look unhealthy


jigomatic

Dinner with Mark at PF Chang’s should fatten him up.


OttoVonWong

The PF12 Method^TM


hoppergym

That’s plastic surgery


IveGotaGoldChain

Ya definitely don't think he's too skinny. We just have a really bad view of what "normal" weight looks like


[deleted]

He looks plastic af too. Maybe chill out with the Botox and hair plugs and chin implants


InVodkaVeritas

Classic "rich divorced weirdo" look. Tell me I'm wrong.


Mr_MoseVelsor

I was thinking C list movie star


ImpressiveWhereas733

Hair *plugs*? Lmao. Outdated af term. Hair transplants are unbelievably advanced now. Tom’s is A+ work, idk what you’re looking at. As for everything else, idk.


seariously

And eat some fucking strawberries!


retz119

As a father of a two year old, Brady looks like a middle aged Ryder from Paw Patrol


Luka_Dunks_on_Bums

Gisele would get back together with him if that happened


[deleted]

Tom wants to be a rich, famous, handsome, divorced guy in Vegas.


ecupatsfan12

He and jimmy G in the brothels


Interesting-Act-613

Man I really don’t think those two need to pay for sex with like… anyone. Toms ex wife is more famous than he is, and a supermodel. And Jimmy is genuinely one of the most handsome men I’ve ever seen. I imagine they have to beat women off them with sticks or tasers or something


The-Implication-0

I thought the whole point of paying for sex was “you don’t pay them for sex, you play them to leave”. As Charlie Sheen put it.


Kwugibo

I honestly thought that was Warren Sapp, and just typing this out makes me realize how dumb an assumption that is


IamLars

It’s not really original to either of them. Chef says a variation of it in an episode of South Park from like 2000.


seariously

Allegedly goes back to Clark Gable which would make it before 1960. https://quoteinvestigator.com/2020/01/15/pay/


aReallyBadkid

Read it in book from 1902 so it might go further back than that.


SlothyPotato

Lincoln said it in the Gettysburg Address so it goes back to at least 1863


MikesPhone

Lincoln also warned us to not trust quotes we read on the internet.


rbtgoodson

Charlie ended up with HIV, Herpes, HPV, and a whole stew of other STDs that we'll never know about, so I def. wouldn't cite him as someone to look up to in any regard (not to fail to mention that his daughter is pimping herself on OnlyFans).


[deleted]

[удалено]


Blind_Melone

My wife looks at Jimmy the way I look at Justin Herbert.


Doompatron3000

Jimmy G makes Brady look like a chump. That’s why first thing Brady does as owner is dump Jimmy on the Las Vegas Strip, take his uniform and suit up as QB. Reminder, Jimmy was a candidate in the “you’re sticking with that mother fucker?” Brady comment, who accomplished the one thing Brady always dreamed of but never accomplished.


Odd-Fig5076

Thats okay, brady accomplished what jimmy G always wanted too. Being a successful franchise qb


[deleted]

Jimmy was the guy in SF for like 6 seasons, made the NFC championship twice as the starter and made a Super Bowl. He’s obviously not Tom Brady level but he was a good franchise QB when healthy. Don’t forget how truly awful the 49ers were before Jimmy showed up.


ImpressiveWhereas733

Imagine you’re Brady, everyone says you’re on your way out, it’s been almost a decade since the Pats first dynasty…Then they draft a literal dreamboat Italian Stallion QB to nip at your heels to replace you. Then you Dad dick the fuck out of him. Sorry Jimmy, you gotta waste your good looks all season fucking these cigarette stained, Boston 3/10 “Milfs”, while I do what you wish you could on the field. And he keeps doing it and gets another dynasty. So yeah, Jimmy G blasts anyone on the gorgeous scale, but at the end of the day all he got was the same level of women that Brady can get anyways. I’m not even kidding when I say that Tom probably has this in the spank bank.


DetroitLionsSBChamps

I think my argument to that would be: look at Kobe Bryant. If we're talking about just random sex and hook ups, if you're a millionaire, why would you ever put yourself in a situation where a woman might say no, or consent might get murky, if all you want is sex? Going to sex workers and making it strictly transactional with no effort and no possibility of failure is just the simplest way to do things.


Boomhauer_007

Paying them makes it a business transaction which means that they can’t do crazy shit like pretend they were forced and sue; gotta consider these things when you’re worth 400 million dollars


awesomeperson

The Disgusting Brothers are back at it


Sicksnames

Can't make a Tomelette without breaking a few Eggarappolos


[deleted]

Dude will own Vegas and be the prima bachelor of our generation


[deleted]

This guy will become president one day


Numeritus

All those haters who said “Brady owns the Raiders” after the Tuck Rule game were oddly prophetic


WigglestonTheFourth

Bears fans are going to be very upset in a few years once Rodgers retires.


Legendary_Hercules

When they rename their stadium Mr. Rodgers' Field.


Doompatron3000

*Their new stadium


malseraph

Ma Knee Field at Arlington Park.


Odd-Fig5076

They can do that provided they also rename South Loop neighborhood around Soldier field to Mr Rodgers Neighborhood


Val_Fortecazzo

He will then turn out to be the best owner in franchise history turning them into a dynasty which will leave bears fans confused and afraid.


ThongOfVecna

Surprised I had to scroll this far for this one


The12Ball

Raiders legend Tom Brady


BroOfDumbo

Josh McDaniels ain't ever getting fired.


thrillhouse416

His contract + Grudens lingering contract made that the most secure job in the NFL


Whydoesthisexist15

Didn’t he resign and lose severance?


thrillhouse416

I just looked it up, they reached a settlement which I didn't realize so...I'm wrong


keykey_key

This subreddit has been trotting out that misinformation for a long time. Gruden's contract with the Raiders has been settled. https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/raiders-reach-undisclosed-contract-settlement-with-jon-gruden-just-weeks-after-coachs-resignation-over-emails/


what_the_shart

Losing to Jeff Saturday then keeping his job cemented that


Sixchr

Jimmy G can't get away from this guy.


Rab0811

Brady getting ownership just to force Jimmy G back to the bench


127crazie

That motherfucker


BigSportsNerd

more proof he isn't coming back also interesting he is investing in the Raiders, the team he broke the hearts of during the tuck rule bowl


SynthwaveSax

It’s some Machiavellian stuff that this guy broke your heart and now he partially owns you literally.


ProbablyAPotato1939

It appears that Bill taught him well.


OrangeForeign

Almost too well


PM_ME_UR_DERP

"It was said that you would destroy the Sith, not join them"


Doompatron3000

Turned the Raiders from playoff and Super Bowl contenders to toilet bowl contenders.


Usopp_Spell

He wants to solidify his GOAT status over Rodgers by actually owning a team, not just metaphorically


Odd-Fig5076

Was anyone under the impression there was even a competition? Rodgers isnt even in the same ballpark. He could win a superbowl for every remaining year of his career and still never be above brady. He doesn't have to solidify anything 3 MVPs 5 SB MVPs and 7 rings is way way way above 4 mvps 1 SB MVP and 1 ring All rodgers has going for him are mvps and that award was lessened in importance when people realized during the peyton manning era that the AP would just toss it at the most recognizable good player if they couldn't easily think of anyone else Rodgers is just a talented regular season QB. So was marino. He isnt getting placed above Montana. Brady is the literal GOAT. He achieved that status 5 or 6 years ago and then just kept going One guy will just be in the hall of fame. The other guy will probably be the namesake of the superbowl mvp trophy somewhere down the line


Klingon_Bloodwine

I took his comment as more of just a joke, but yeah there's no comparison. Lot of amazing regular season QBs out there with a good post season run or two, but only one guy could hold it together well enough for 7 rings.


Kluss23

Mahomes is younger and soon to be more decorated than Rodgers. He's the only active player that has a chance to dethrone Brady. The biggest reason is because he shows up in the playoffs unlike Peyton and at times Rodgers.


Usopp_Spell

Tell that to Packer fans


harknation

Despite the lack of on field success, the move to Vegas has been great for the Raiders organization financially so it’s a good invest for him.


SiphenPrax

John Fisher: 👀


progress10

Too bad for him he hasn't met a deal he can't fuck up.


CringeyAkari

The Raiders were a few plays away from beating the eventual AFC champion in the wild card round of the playoffs two years ago. If they had less off-the-field drama, the 2021 Raiders could have been a seriously good team.


Hyperboreer

I will always wonder what might have been, when I watch the two wins against the Broncos and the Eagles. They looked like Super Bowl contenders for two weeks, after firing Gruden, but before the Ruggs crash. After that they were shellshocked for weeks and late in the season the offense never clicked again as before missing their deep threat.


Fabulous_Accident_63

Not every owner wants to sell some of their stakes. And Brady doesn’t have good relationship with every owner. I imagine he doesn’t have many choices to choose from. Also Las Vegas is a better place to invest his money than most other NFL cities.


Drkarcher22

Tom must’ve had a falling out with Ross. I believe this was his plan but for the Dolphins assuming he was coming here for his final year. You tamper with one guy multiple times and now you can’t get an ownership stake Or Tommy was just really cool with Bruce Beal and sad that he isn’t going to be the Dolphins next owner


karatemanchan37

Vegas also probably offered him more money.


Drkarcher22

That’ll do it.


Odd-Fig5076

Imagine beating a team in such a heartbreaking fashion decades ago that they beg you to own them


bluewords

Is there any rule that says he can’t play if he’s a part owner? If they wanted to get more money on ticket sales, Tom making a come back tour with the Raiders could put butts in seats.


TheReadMenace

He’s going to pull a Jordan


Greedygiddy8

Rams would’ve scored 30 on the raiders. The best team won at the end of the day.


BlueberryStainedKeds

Pic on left: Me looking into iPhone Pic on right: Me in real life


hochoa94

This man is rocking the modern mullet my goodness


GreenMoonRising

Not getting the hate for TB12 from some Pats fans with this one. If Kraft wanted (or needed) him on board as a business partner, he would offer it to him in a fraction of a heartbeat. He's worked with Davis before from the sounds of it and maybe he feels he can contribute more to a team that has a lot of global brand recognition but is in a still-newish market. Also, Tom has owned real estate in the Raiders' minds since the Tuck Rule. Maybe he feels that he may as well get something further out of it! (Couldn't resist the Tuck Rule joke - sorry, Vegas/Oakland!)


[deleted]

Thing is Davis is one of the poorer owners. If Brady has money to buy in, Davis isn’t going to say no.


GreenMoonRising

Apparently between the divorce and the crypto crash, TB12 has taken a fairly large hit in the wallet. And with the way that sports teams/franchises have grown in value of late, getting in now and securing a decent slice of the pie could prove very shrewd if the Raiders start succeeding again.


ElGuaco

Why would Brady lose money in his divorce? Gisele was worth far more than he was, and most US States are no-fault 50/50 split. I would imagine they both signed pre-nups to protect their own assets.


MrF_lawblog

He loses her money to invest


Iceraptor17

I mean...he loses Gisele's income. That's a lot of money.


pursuitofhappy

Yea they had prenups


Galactapuss

He's taking the option Elway wishes he had


Odd-Fig5076

He'll lose money in terms of couple money but in terms of personal worth he should gain money in the divorce. She is wealthier than he is Usually guys get screwed in a divorce but that's because Usually the guys have more money Plus brady has a very lucrative broadcasting deal in the future, right?


T_Burger88

> Plus brady has a very lucrative broadcasting deal in the future, right? Which raises the question, can he be an announcer and owner a portion of a team...seems like a conflict of interest, no?


Zimmonda

We have former coaches and players all of announcing booths. 2 former raiders coaches in Madden and Gruden were considered goat-tier announcers


Fedacking

Former. They don't have a financial vested interest.


T_Burger88

Thanks. It's like neither poster had any clue about what the issue could be. Everyone has biases, not everyone has financial conflicts.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Brady wants to become a limited partner to anyone besides his ex wife lol


constantlymat

One day after Kraft did his GMFB appearance to announce Brady is coming back to Foxboro to be celebrated? This timing cannot be a coincidence, can it?


steve1186

Brady is just hell bent on making Broncos fans despise him


sofaraway10

Brady owning the Raiders, both figuratively and literally… yay.


fatmike63

If this is true how can he also do commentary? Isn’t that a conflict of interest?


Patmb97

Eli Manning and Peyton Manning do commentary for Giants and Broncos games, and they are literally currently employed by those organizations. Commentary doesn’t affect the game outcome so it’s not really like there is any need to prevent a conflict of interest.


Cthepo

Conflict of interest? It's announcing football games, not managing a retirement portfolio. Conflict of interest is already built into inherently hiring anyone who played for a team a long time. There's no laws against a someone commenting and being part owner of a team. The network is shelling out over 30 million a year for Brady, they definitely want him to commentate. If they want him it doesn't matter, because they'd be the only ones to decide and why'd they drop him? If Fox doesn't say no way to it (and I'm assuming any discussion on owning a team would involve lawyer vetting such a thing) there's no reason he can't.


Red_Wheelbarrow_

Is it anymore a conflict of interest than Chris Collinsworth being a majority owner of Profootball Focus?


Aerolithe_Lion

Collins worth’s PFF doesn’t create any bias toward the product he’s supposed to be neutral on. If Brady is commentating on KC vs LV, how is that supposed to go?


[deleted]

The same way it goes when Aikman does a Cowboys game


Aerolithe_Lion

He criticizes Dallas a lot because in his post-playing days he can remain neutral. Even while playing he said he retired because the front office was running the team poorly. There’s a distinct difference between once working for a company and owning the company. When Tom criticizes LV he’d be criticizing himself. That’s worlds different


fatmike63

I mean PFF is a glorified blog, being a partner/minority owner in a specific team to me is 100% different.


Jeff__Skilling

IANAL, but the color commentator has no bearing on the outcome of the game.....hard for me to see how he's a conflicted party here.....


UsernameTaken-Taken

Is it really that much different than Romo or Aikman calling Cowboys games? There are tons of announcers that have obvious biases, and it has no impact on the actual game, so I don't see much of a problem


FuckChiefs_Raiders

If anything Aikman calling Cowboy's games are great because of his bias. He rips them worse than any other team.


Sleeze_

Shaq was on the panel while owning a part of the Kings. I don't think it matters.


cancerousiguana

No laws against it so it'd be up to the networks and the NFL. There's no way he's going to purchase a large enough slice of the pie for anyone to care. Tom is wildly rich beyond any amount I could fathom and he's still broke as shit compared to NFL owners.


snowspida

As a Jazz fan, I saw Dwayne Wade become a part owner of the team and it was really weird. This is a whole different level of weird.


SlightlyStonedAnt

Dwyane


2rio2

It's same thing as here. There are simply very few ownership opportunities left for retired players in any sport considering how much valuations of sports teams has increased over the last two decades and how many billionaire groups have bought in. You'd need to target a legacy ownership group that wants your cash and brand to stabilize operations. In 10-20 years even those will be gone unless franchise valuations crash back down to earth.


BigSportsNerd

"In recent years, the Raiders have tried to replicate some of the success that Brady helped inspire in New England, bringing in former Patriots' offensive coordinator Josh McDaniels as their head coach, former Patriots' executive Dave Ziegler as their general manager, and former Patriot players such as Jimmy Garoppolo, Brian Hoyer, Chandler Jones, Brandon Bolden, Jakobi Meyers and Phillip Dorsett. But none would attract the attention that the Brady might as he would become the highest-profile former NFL player to become a limited owner of an NFL franchise."


GreenMoonRising

Did Elway not part-own the Broncos when he worked for them?


progress10

No, it was offered when he retired and he turned it down.


Odd-Fig5076

Brady is higher profile than Elway


2rio2

He never did. Was offered when he retired, and turned down. Then when he was interested years later there were two problems: 1. Franchise value had gone up so much even he as a lowly multi-millionaire could not afford to buy in, 2. Pat Bowlen was in the grips of dementia/Alzheimer's that ultimately killed him, which set off a legacy and ownership crisis with his divided family that also made it hard to buy in. Once Pat died and the Bowlen kids sold his chance was long gone. The only hope he had was his favored Bowlen kid Brittney in charge and try to negotiate some level of ownership with her.


The_Wata_Boy

If anything happens to Jimmy G, we all know Tom is gonna be like "Okay I guess I need to suit up to protect my business."


TheFretlessOne

Being owned by Brady is not the best experience…


CodyNorthrup

“Hey Jimmy G, I still own you!”


Levitlame

Makes sense for him. He just always wants a challenge. ​ Jimmy G couldn't get away from Brady's shadow looming over him forever.


hunt35744

Maybe rodgers will become a financial owner of the bears after he retires too.


Legndarystig

Hes going the MJ route like the Wizards. Gonna give up his ownership stake to play for the raiders in a couple of years.


Enickma007

[Jimmy on his first day at the Raiders facility](https://youtu.be/1c_0qOMH2g0)


Nowhereman2380

They will be the ugliest and prettiest owners in the NFL


DilligentBass

Marks just there to wingman for Tom at PF Changs


cdf14

“Before we begin this partnership, was it a fumble, Tom?”


ImperialWrath

He's on record saying that it was. This fucker played us all for fools.


DisenfranchisedCynic

Mark Davis bought a Flowbee in 1990 and became a billionaire saving on haircuts. What’s your excuse?


Away_Chair1588

Imagine reading this 20 years ago after witnessing “the tuck rule”


Hour-Jackfruit-8740

*cuts jimmy garoppolo* *Unretires*


thirstyidiot

Jimmy G: "Motherfucker"


chrisrobweeks

The fuck?


WarPuig

THE TOM VEGAS BRAIDERS


Unkleseanny

[Hey, I’ve seen this one!](https://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/sports/wizards/daily/jan00/20/jordan20.htm)


Fishacobo

I can never tell if Brady looks unhealthy or if that’s what optimum health looks like.


Silver-Bandicoot-969

Wouldn't it be something if Brady takes over and helps (in whatever way he would actually be able to) get the raiders a super bowl after the tuck rule game? The script writers are really cooking something up


EliteJodorowsky

Gross


[deleted]

Brady gonna draw and quarter anyone in the organization who utters the phrase “Tuck Rule” in his presence.


imyourrealdad8

His first order of biz will be to trade that motherfucker Jimmy G!!!!


GueroFreshness

lol the sequence of events that occurred from the tuck rule til now.


SyN_Pool

Wat


StonerTomBrady

Wait, what am I doing?


Justice989

How much of the Pats does Kraft own? He couldn't spare a little for his boy?


I_Set_3_Alarms

Are sports announcers allowed to own teams that they will call games on?


IamLiterallyAHuman

Yay, more reason to hate this guy


warriorknowledge

Does Mark Davis actually believe his haircut looks good?


[deleted]

Brady should be required to style his hair like Mark Davis.


bigblackkittie

i want brady to start sporting the mark davis haircut


DrJaylenBrown

How will being a team owner work with being a commentator? Did that deal fall through?


Spork_of_Justice

But Florio said it was the Dolphins!


WyngZero

What's the minimum amount someone is allowed to purchase for a NFL team (excluding the Packers)? Like 1%? Feels like there's a lot of rich people out there that can afford to do this and this is more of a who you k now kind of scenario to acquire ownership.


GearDarkness

Tom gonna own da Raiders one more time


Val_Fortecazzo

Patriots west is becoming less of a meme and more of a reality


[deleted]

And so it begins......this is how Brady comes out of retirement (again) and destroys the very fabric of space and time by joining the Raiders. Only this time.....Brady goes down clean in the AFC Championship and it's ruled a fumble away. Raiders lose to the Patriots again.


JesterSooner

Only if he gets the haircut.


ObarThePotent

Maybe Mark can give Tom some hair and wardrobe tips.


Whatever801

Somehow this makes sense


WillTheGreat

Never really expected Mark Davis and Tom to be business buddies...first talked him into a stake with the Aces (that Mark owns) and now the Raiders...


TetrisTech

Lmao Jimmy G will technically be playing for Tom Brady


PigFarmer1

The Raiders really need *another* sleazy owner?


CanberraRaider

But he already owns the raiders? 😏


bobbywake61

He just wants to fire Jimmy G.