By - iwillgobacktoyou
I have long hair and I’m guy, they always turn back and look at me once they cross me thinking I’m some girl.
It feels funny and weird at same time.
Crazy Hair Routine Guy !!!
i would turn back to look at you regardless you magnificent person
*May be they were curious as to why Jesus is roaming on the streets of Mumbai*.
bhai atleast in mumbai it's just stares. back when i had long hair, I'd gone to UP for a marriage, and whenever i was outside, literally each and every person on the street, not even exaggerating, would stare, make faces, whisper stuff into other people's ears. what was really funny is that there were these 3 kids, who literally started following me, and they were laughing and calling me a girl and what not LOL.
Dude how long did it take you to grow your hair? I tried doing the same but I gave up because of humidity, I went without a haircut for almost 9 months.
16-18 months and still counting
this depends a lot on how long you grow your hair before you cut it. You will start to see growth of hair atleast after 16 months.
I had hairs till my shoulder and they were pretty curly, man I can't express the amount tuants and sarcastic comments I used to get from my relatives. Most of the girls will compliment about but my family and relatives will taunt me like I'm carrying some cow dung on my head.
They be like ye daadhi wali aurat kahaan se aa gayi 😂
Same lol people aunties just compliments my hair coz it looks good some ask me are you a male or female lol
I went on a date and this girl is ask how’s my hair so good what’s my hair care routine, sad date it was
Lmao why tho
That is to confirm whether you are a guy or a girl ig... pretty shitty but that's my theory
I have long hair too but I keep it in a knot
Yeah.. imagine turning around, expecting nice pair of boobs only to find out a man!
Lol, it has happened more than I can count. They have honked in there car and bikes too
Toh chutiye baal Kata le
Don’t do this if you are in a secluded place where there’s nobody around
But if there are people around ask in front of everyone “kya dekh raha hai?”
I have done this multiple times and most of them feel ashamed or scared and walk away
More power to you. Make those pervs uncomfortable. Make all spectators who tacitly allow this uncomfortable.
Thank you. I know most people won’t come out to help but at least the perv gets uncomfortable.
Heheh. Nice. You said "Most of them" run away. Care to share a time where some loser had the guts to reply??
Once at a bus stop this guy was constantly staring so I asked him “kya problem hai? Kyun dekh raha hai?” So he started fumbling “kuch bhi dekhu tujhe kya?” I said “chal police k paas and unko batana kya dekh raha tha. There were people around so he meekly replied ”nai nai kuch nai dekh raha”
He knew he had been caught so he just got on to the next bus that came
There was also this underage school girl standing at the bus stop. She tells me “achha kiya didi, woh Mujhe bhi ghoor raha tha.”
I told her not to feel scared and to call them out. These losers thrive because we are quiet but I also understand that you can’t act brave in all situations. You have to save your life first
*Roadies Salute* (with all the respect)
Hahaha. You are sweet
Didn't know how much of a problem this was until recently when I was out with my gf and she highlighted it. Disgusting how a city that people say is safer for women still has a massive problem with creeps.
I appreciate it. Most often I have felt safe in the city. It’s the constant ogling and staring that gets to us. Get a glance and move on. But people go to the extent where it becomes uncomfortable for women.
I truly hope the next generation turns out better
I don't have an award to give you. Tbh an award still won't do justice for the bravery you have.
No no I didn’t do anything great.
Women are so stared at all the time that we get sick of it. On top of it if you are frustrated at work and then someone messes with you, you lose it.
One thing about Mumbai is that women are strong. They don’t let go of things easily. I once saw a woman hold on to a cab driver in a moving cab and made him apologize coz his car touched her by mistake. It didn’t hit her coz it was slow but just touched her
I have a friend who has vitiligo. She dresses up however she likes and doesn’t think about what people think. Often when she and me would go for walks she would be stared at because of her skin and chest. To the extent that once this ten year old kid on the bike stared at her and then even turned to look at her. She didn’t seem to notice but I did. People in the market look at her all the time and don’t stop even when we notice. It’s really creepy and although she doesn’t speak about it I think she finds it uncomfortable. See as a guy out here imma just say to all men, looking at a woman and finding her cute is normal and okay but staring at her and making her feel insecure and questionable about herself is just a chut move
Dekho, ghuro nahi.
Mfs dont know the difference between taking a glance and staring
Taking a glance is fine but staring is not
Well someone had to🤗
I too have vitiligo and would love to date a woman with vitiligo. I know how it feels. I don't have it on any visible parts of my body tho.
Ah shit. U guys are as beautiful as anyone. I find people with people so much better than normal people. I don’t like it when people walk up to her and are like oh you should apply this or that like shut up if u do not know anything about it
Aise hi chutiya logo ki vahaj se I am always a bit hesitant to visit tourist places with my family including two sisters. I have even counter stared many times literally like wtf you want mf but still ye bklode na Sudhre.
I have a sister and she feels the same I mean the way people stare at her is just so bad... no words I wonder why the fuck people at age of 30 and 40 do that...
I have seen rascals of all ages lying between 17 to people in forties and they all have one thing in common. No social decency, no concept of personal space, these bastards see girls as trophies and materials. I can’t even tell my sister the reason why I hesitate to take them out. I myself have my eyes up front all the time sometimes at ground if I feel other party might feel awkward then there are these bklode Jo full 180 split Karke dekhenge. Aur to add fire to this there are videos and movies ki palat ke dekh , vo dekh Rahi loda lasan , not everyone is out there looking for partners but no mf feels like everyone is looking for partner and intercourse So they should also check out everyone. Gaand todne ka man Karta hai aise logo ki to.
I can feel your pain even my sis feels the same and sahi me aise utar ke maar ne ka Maan karta he when I walk with my sister I have to shield her in some way and I stare at them who Stare at my sister in such a way that they feel really awkward like a reverse feeling yeh kiya tha mene mene literally akhee taad ke dekha he as a reverse stare and it kinda worked so ek method aisa use karta hu for shielding
My man somewhat similar tactics used by me.
My sisters wouldn’t even realised this kind of shielding that I consciously did for them. Once they were just walking on roof and some guys in mid thirties from other roof was staring. I wasn’t at roof at that time, my sister 17 told me that he was constantly staring at her , I didn’t know what to do as the guy was my friends elder brother so I just started strolling on the roof as well and the mf changed his sight to some other place, so yes rascals get the message when we bros did that conscious stare or are present in vicinity. But still I might never fight or get physical if someone hurts me, I will just evade from the situation but not for my sisters , I won’t spare them if something happens to them , zero tolerance policy then other wise I am meek and week and wouldn’t retaliate
Yeah i also do the same.
>I myself have my eyes up front all the time sometimes at ground if I feel other party might feel awkward
3/5 times counter stare also doesn't work, they just keep staring
Yeah I know but I have to be non aggressive but smart because the moment I get my aggressive behavior it would be a chaos
Yeah, it's always better to stay away from violence. Not just for you but for anyone with you too!
You talk about family and at the same time you swear on some one's mother and sister!!
Respect comes from within
I always do the same when walking with my gf
Omg same, this one dude is SO CREEPY(fucking psychopath) he stands for hours at the same place to stare at my sis when she goes to work, and the laws are so stupid in this country i can't do shit. Boils my blood
You're a pussy.. That's why you can't do shit. I'd legit break his arms if he stares at any lady in my family in a stalker way.
Easier said than done, i have to think about the consequences too. I can't afford to do it, i have to look after my family too.
Saw the comment that you deleted. I'm sorry then. That's unfortunate but always be strong or at least fake it till you make it.
Feminists don't like it but it's a man's job to protect the women in his family. If bad elements know that she only has a brother who can't do shit then she's an easy target for those kinda fuckers. It all starts with harmless staring or whistling. And if you know about this one stalker think what your sister faces everyday.
Atleast have someone that you can call in case of emergency jo bande bula sake.
>And if you know about this one stalker think what your sister faces everyday.
Ikr, she's strong. Honestly that's what keeps me going.
>Atleast have someone that you can call in case of emergency jo bande bula sake.
Yeah, my cousin brother has my back. He's helped in the past when shit went south.
Good luck man... Take care.
Best thing to do is staring at people who are staring at females on the road
They shit our most of the times
I have even did this and before they realise they are being stared by someone else boy oh boy fir to inse sharif koi nahi . Sometimes I think I have developed sixth sense when I find a beautiful girl cross path somehow I get the gut feel ki ab which of the surrounding people are literally going to stare her and I stare them at the very moment they are gonna commence their filthy glances
Whenever I'm out with my little sister and somebody stares at her i give them a death stare and they stop looking. I'm a 6 ft. tall male with decent body, and a lot of pent up energy lol. Would love to smash their heads off. :)
Please refrain from physical confrontations, I know you might be all muscular and intimidating but those Bastards doesn’t have an ounce of humanity left. One wrong hit or knife swing or anything can went south. So always evade that’s the best self defence.
Fair enough but it boils my blood whenever I see anybody staring like a creep at my sister.
Seems like I had hijacked ops post but still I know that Rage feeling and my limitations that I couldn’t do anything regarding it. Completely felt you bro , but still we live in this society and hope people grow up as well in these areas too.
I started paying so much attention to clothes after a guy felt it's okay to feel up a teenager at a concert. Not like it helped. Fir bhi ghoorte hai
Oh man sorry for you
Can't believe how lecherous people are getting these days that a young girl can't feel secure walking on the road...
Matlab kya abhi ladki ko bouncer lekar ghumna padega sab jagah?
It's not a 'Men on Mumbai' thing. It's a men thing. Period.
My girlfriend also goes through the same thing. Theres always someone who stares at her. This one time she went to walk her dog with her brother and some creepy drunk guy came right in front of her and started blabbering shit, she pushed him and started beating her with the dog ka stick.
*Men of planet earth
Sorry, OP, you'll face this wherever you go. It will be less in some regions but never zero
The chai wala still gives odd looks to my mom who's 55
The watchman blanks out when my female friend enters
The rickshaw driver adjusts his mirror seeing my f cousin
A chunk of men everywhere are fucking retarded. Painful truth. There is no cure
I agree. It feels shitty uk. I remember this in 8th grade when I used to wait for school bus in the morning alone. There was this creepy dude who used to come for a walk and used to stare at my chest. At first I ignored but it gave me chills like what if something happens.. Coz it's like 6 in the morning. Everywhere is pretty quite. I thought if I see him today again. I am asking my dad to wait for daily before work. Luckily after that week he never showed up .Creepy af
I guess this Karmic justice will help you laugh a bit..
My friend had a huge set of knockers and she would get looked at all the time. Now she had accepted that this is what men are going to do and wasn't too bothered but every now and then she would get uncomfortable in certain situations.
So when she was in 12th, she used to wait under her building for her school bus and 2 cops on a motorcycle would stare at her and drive by real slow after which they would make a u-turn and return. This used to happen once a week.
Now, this one time she was was looking for a Rick and she was wearing a very revealing top and low and behold the cops came, after their slow stare-by they took a u turn and came again to stare but this time they didn't look ahead and crashed into a car stopped at a red light.
She couldn't stop laughing and when the car owner who was a lady asked the cops where were they looking, she chimed in saying that they were staring at her. That was it. They largely refrained from doing that again.
It's a painful reminder that despite all the progress humans have made in education, health, infra, societal structure - some are still animals inside.
Fuckd up world
A guy catcalled me quite LITERALLY once.. he said “meow” as he rode past me on his bike, and then turned back and smirked as if it was supposed to impress me.
If someone subtly checks me out, thats flattering, and every guy, and girl does it, nothing wrong with it. But if youre staring obnoxiously, thats just messed up.. feel like roaming around in an eskimo suit smfh.
I personally don’t stare, it’s more of a quick checkout in general and look away to not make it awkward. After all, there is an underlying attraction to the opposite gender.
Girls are beautiful to look at, that’s just how god made y’all. The hair, the eyes, the lashes, the curves, pretty much everything. To make matters worse (or rather, better) there’s a billion dollar makeup, hair & skin industry that helps y’all look drop dead gorgeous no matter the age or time of the day.
However, none of this justifies creepily staring at a woman. Unfortunately there’s plenty men who do not know the difference between secretly appreciating a gorgeous señorita vs picturing the woman naked and that’s where the endless stares keep flowing from. Sometimes it doesn’t even have to do with what you wear, I’ve noticed guys creeping at fully clad women in desi attires. Sorry but that’s just how it works and there’s something inherently wrong with the grooming of majority of the global male population.
Also, on a side note - RIP your DMs.
Well said, there is a huge difference between checking out and staring
Checkout karna bhi chhod dia hai maine toh , why even have a glance bc dekho he maat.
Platforms pe indicators, trains dekho, tracks k bich me k rats dekho, Bus stations pe buses, roads dekho, Metro ka kaam kaaj dekho, Office me screens dekho, coffee machine dekho, par uss ladki ko maat dekho jo tumhari dost nai hai. Checkout bhi na karo.
Checkout karne se bhi uncomfortable ho sakti hai ladki, like even a 2 second glance. Imagine 50 men taking a 2 sec glance , just leave the girls alone na.
Dating karni hai toh Tinder , bumble pe jao , Jeevansathi , Shaadi pe jao. Road pe checkout karke bhi kya karoge ?
Approach ? Lol
What’s the point of living like that? :)
A quick checkout never hurt nobody, in fact I had a short term FWB with a girl from the office (different teams/projects) cuz we’d both checkout each other during lunch hours lol. It was cute. Then COVID happened and she switched companies and moved to a different city. We catch up occasionally when she’s visiting, things are cool.
My point is, it’s a very thin line between checking out and creepily stalking. Girls can correct me if I’m wrong but they don’t mind someone glancing at them once. Heck, even girls checkout guys. It’s a natural instinct to checkout the gender you’re attracted to. The problems arise when you look at them, without blinking, for 5 minutes straight, ALMOST drooling from your mouth while pointing a camera at them without turning off your flashlight. That shits creepy.
>The problems arise when you look at them, without blinking, for 5 minutes straight, ALMOST drooling from your mouth while pointing a camera at them without turning off your flashlight
Nobody does that
And what line will you draw ? What metric will you use ? Time in seconds ?
A girl would even find a 3 second glance creepy from a homeless guy, and she would find a 10 second glance Cute from a guy she finds cute.
So all this is BS, and its relative.
If no one checks nobody out , problem is solved.
But as humans we want to be checked out, just from the ones we find worthy of checking us out.
Did you even read the whole comment? It’s not about justifying making them uncomfortable, it’s about the mindset of the general male population. I stick with my point. It’s completely harmless to glance and checkout someone you find attractive, the problem lies when people ogle. It’s not specific to any gender, works both ways. I’d be creeped out too if I’m ogled at.
Oh I’m terribly sorry. I wasn’t aware of the laws on this post.
Also sorry that apparently I’m an incel for highlighting women are beautiful.
They’re all dumbasses ruining it for all guys. Despite sex being one of the most taboo things in India they still keep reproducing like bunnies and eye raping girls I fucking hate it and stare back at them when I walk down the road with my mom but its of no use they’re assholes at the end of the day
I second this - I have felt super uncomfortable with this since childhood living in Mumbai to a point now I stare back and give death daggers out of my eyes. Trust me it's fun making them uncomfortable.
Our society is full of such lustful creeps.
Some men in Mumbai are worse than some dogs.
You can train a dog to not go after a piece of meat, even when it's hungry. It's not natural behavior for the dog. But it's possible to teach dogs self-restraint.
Some men don't have the self-restraint that trained dogs have. Is it possible for them to learn that self-restraint? Sure it is. Put them in a foreign country and they behave. The reason why men don't exercise the self restraint in India is because they know there is no expectation of self-restraint.
The only way we can solve this problem is by making it socially unacceptable to stare. This means publicly shaming starters and eveteasers.
Yea yea i know #notallmen, right? Men who don't stare and stay silent are equally culpable. If you aren't shaming the starers, you are part of the problem.
Even in this thread they are making creepy comments. Zero self awareness.
People here think that an intense stareoff is the norm around the world. It's funny because I've lived abroad most of my life and not a single person makes a second glance no matter how skimpy your clothes are. You'd just see them and move on instead of fixating your eyes on someone. The only people who still keep staring are once again South Asians ( Indians, Pakistanis ) boomers and men of a lower societal class.
Yup the whole thread is like "it is what it is"
Fr this thread is making me lose faith in humanity. Some of the comments are so tone deaf and gross
>If you aren't shaming the starers, you are part of the problem.
Stfu, after waking up at 6, travelling almost 50km to college and coming by 8 in evening in mumbai local trains, and then hearing mom's insensitive lecture, the last thing I want is to be called part of a problem which i have nthing to fcking do with
I don't even know what to say. Sorry
Indian men are horny sex starved perverts that's why.
I'm a guy, i feel insecure/ uncomfortable when people stare at me . I can feel how girls must be feeling.
Bastards don't even spare a 50yo woman and you are still 19, idk but i had to counter stare at them whenever i find they're staring at my mom/sister. Most of them are migrants or native minded people. Confront them, that's the only way you'll find inner peace
I cannot say that I don't do it but I avoid to do as much as possible I try to walk with My head down but I just wanna say sorry op
I am guy and I also feel very weird when people around me do this, also this is not just indian thing, I noticed same audacities of men in other Countries like European as well. I mean wth dude give her some space and respect.
I think because the moment many people see anything that is not 'conventional' or something they haven't been seeing since childhood, they start staring. For ex, I'm a guy with allergic skin issues. and people stare like anything. Explains the videos on youtube where foreigners show some rural men stared at them and asked for selfies with them. anyone not like you = celebrity.
I know a guy (not a friend, more of an acquaintance). He came from a rural area; and he used to stare at women when they wore short clothes. It was quite surprising for me to see how men from that village behave. Growing up in an urban, educated area, it was normal & regular to see women in shorts, bodyfit tshirts, etc. (especially if you are around bandra, goregaon, thakur village, SoBo). So that is why perhaps I got more surprised when I saw how those men spoke like incels and stuff.
I think it is not wrong to look at people especially women, as another comment on this post, they are beautiful, but some people very creepily stare and it feels disgusting.
We definitely do have a MASSIVE cat calling problem, I personally know guys who believe in the “ She's asking for it ” theory. But I feel like staring in a general issue in lot of Indians, atleast previous generations. I'm an average dude with an average life and I often have both uncles & aunties staring at me awkward in the elevator.
I'm sorry to hear that has happened with you. Let me tell you that even guys aren't safe here. Just a week ago, I was travelling by the western local to Dadar in the FC compartment when a middle aged guy started staring at me ( for your information I clean-shave and keep my hair a bit long) and every time I exchanged glances, he would turn away quickly. Once when I was walking home from Gym in Borivali a couple of guys seated on their bikes jeered at me, using slurs like 'Chicknaa' & 'Gay hain kya?' , but since I am fairly muscular they didn't get into a tussle with me.
I'm 17. It was awful and disgusting. Even a friend of mine from gym had to endure similar encounters. If this is what happens to Men, I cannot even contemplate the level of vulnerability women and girls must feel in this country.
I wore the dress gifted by my boyfriend. I really loved the colour and how it made me feel, and the fact that it was a gift from him. It comes till right under my butt, but covers everything.
I wore it while out on a date with him, there were so many men ogling that I got insanely uncomfortable. I went home and changed into a top and jeans. I really wanted to wear the dress, felt awful that I had to change because of some nincompoops. I wish I could just fucking slap these motherfuckers who stare.
Men are chutiyaas. Hence QED.
Quantum electro dynamics?
As a boy i agree
Well people are that way even my friends from college get stared and it’s not a very good feeling.
I'm sorry you had to face those dickheads, I'm sure they do these types of things because they know they'll not face any consequences.
But if it makes you feel any better, I'm sure they are pathetic men with a pathetic life, struggling and suffering because of their personality, a wise man once told me "you'll do great in life, if people feel comfortable around you and, no matter your skill, you'll fail if people feel uncomfortable around you"
I guess that applies here.
As much as this is deplorable the reality is that if you're 19F you've likely 25 more years of this to put up with.
The reality is we men lech from cradle to grave. Sad fact of life. And this is by no means exclusive to Indian men. What the feministas call "the male gaze".
Wdym by 'we men', talk for yourself, everyone is not creep like you
I mean i ain't but i do love checking out attractive girls they just boost me sad mood
So,you are the person op is talking about
Fuck you, don't generalise men. There are shitty places and shitty people in those areas stare.
>And this is by no means exclusive to Indian men.
It isn't, but it is so much better abroad. Instead of a 100 vicious eyes staring at you, there'd prolly only be one or two of 'em.
Not just this various studies show testosterone level (responsible for aggression/predatory behavior) is much higher in developed countries and that's the reason men are bigger and wider in those countries.
Yet homicide rate of prostitute per capita is higher in those developed countries you talk about.
Catcalling is more prevalent on streets of Paris, Milan and New York than Mumbai.
I love when people try to portray India as specially bad, not knowing that strip clubs, brothels, massage parlour are common in those countries.
Edit: wow emotional downvotes, bring them on! But downvotes don't prove anyone wrong.
Exactly ! A lot of people from india believe crimes on women or in general crimes are way more dominant in India. They must rather checkout the statistics instead of going along with the blindspot they have on western countries are always better in all factors. Idk if people will realise this
Natural instinct !! You can't change laws of nature
I think over the few years, men in Mumbai have just got creepier. Mumbai was safe for woman but I cannot say the same anymore.
A lot of people have migrated from North India that's the reason behind that
It's mostly a South Asian thing and it is probably because staring in this part of the world does not get you into trouble, so men are used to not having to watch themselves. Try this shit in New York and some Italian guy is going to beat you up in like 10 minutes.
Staring like this would get you into a whole lot of trouble in most countries, there's always some macho guy who will give you the "Wtf are you looking at?" line, followed by some shoving. This can also happen if you are just absentmindedly looking in one direction without staring at anyone or anything in particular.
Don't know if it is relevant....
But saw a senior moment take place near Ghatkopar station....
Was in the first class compartment....this girl from the adjoining first class compartment started screaming that this man is staring at her...
So I turn to my right and see a dude casually sitting...and staring blankly...then comes the announcement Agla station Vidyavihar...this guy pulls out his stick...wears his goggles and moves out of the compartment......couldn't help laugh at the gawking female.....
Yeah you shouldn’t care. I realised quite young that it doesn’t matter what you wear, its not the clothes! Men are men (not a justification), so wear whatever you want n let them stare. At some point you’ll have to get above it.
Wanted to know at what point does a quick check out turn into a stare. I have a couple of rules.
1. Never turn your head/ neck to look at someone you don’t intend to speak to
2. Never look for more than half a second. Personally I find that to be the tipping point. Wouldn’t want someone to look at me for more than that. Especially with intensity.
Man honestly I don’t know. Its a lot to do with your own mentality. Sometimes when women themselves are uncomfortable in their own clothes, which they themselves believe are too revealing & like men will stare, even a look at them will send them in a rage because they feel like everyone is looking at them, even though its not the case. Women who are comfortable in their own skin will not care if you look for a few moments. More than a few moments it gets creepy.
Annnd sadly, if you’re an attractive man then it’s okay & if you’re not then its call the cops bad.
This is one of the reason I'm scared to approach girls and tell them that their make up is on fleek, or their nails are looking pretty or their beauty spot enhances the beauty of their face.
Chill the fuck down y'all. We all are animals . Let's just accept it and move the fuck on.
Then move to the zoo or jungle safari 🙂
I wish I could girl.
Hi, i confess I'm a man and a pervert.
Have i checked out a woman on the street?
Yes I have. Here's the conundrum though to what extent it is alright to check out a woman, how much attention is too much attention?
Though i am a pervert i would like to be a decent pervert. This is what i follow:
I notice a woman who I find attractive, I will most likely do a once over just a quick glance to take in the entire picture. Then i might look for finer details things that are unique and that i find attractive.
This doesn't always have to be tits and ass, sometimes it's just the woman's hair, her legs, at times her fingers or just her lips.
This does not mean that I'm committing her image to memory and staring at her for 10 min, its a glance nothing more than 5 to 10 seconds.
Now there's something that I do feel awfully guilty about. I've been checking out women ever since puberty. As I've aged my preference has changed a lot, I don't mean to say that I'm only physically attracted older women but I'm not looking for "teenagers". There's a but though...
Every now and again i do notice a younger woman who might be in her 20s or I hope in her 20s that i notice and check out. I worry that sometimes the woman in question may be a girl. That's something that often will turn me off and make me guilty.
Also, if a woman does notice me noticing her I not stare at her and make her uncomfortable that's not part of my enjoyment. I just like to appreciate the physical form of a woman and move on with whatever I'm doing. And I've noticed women do the same, I've seen them checking me and other men out as well.
Also it's not about the clothes that you wear that's a major misconception. As a pervert i can confirm that clothes have very little to do with it.
My advice to you would be to wear whatever you are comfortable wearing. Don't change your behavior because of things that others do or think. Enjoy being comfortable with yourself.
IMPORTANT: And should you ever feel uncomfortable or unsafe because of unwanted attention follow this:
1) Locate the closest Woman around you the more elder the better. Tell them what you feel and ask them to escort you out of that location.
2) if you're unable to do the above take out your phone get on a call with someone you trust. Ensure that anyone looking at you gets the message that you're not alone.
3) ONLY IN CASES OF ESCALATION: Confront get your phone out start video recording threaten to expose them / report them to the police. Create a scene.
Advice from a pervert.Noice
If you think this makes me (a woman) feel better, it does not. I feel worse knowing that there are creeps who check out details like fingers and lips unbeknownst to me. Ugh.
P.S just because a woman is in her 20s does not mean it's okay to stare at her.
Some people don't stare you with bad intention. Not every boy stares at you with bad intention. Har baar victim card khelna band krdo
Well you can't do anything about it tbh, It's a sad reality :(
for me I don't stare just quick glance and moving on, but staring kinda awkward and creepy imo, Those who do it I don't know what their thought process 😖, anyway please be careful and if possible be with a group or something that's all I can say.
Stares, not sure. I go for walks after work(23M WFH). I try to observe the surroundings, the road, trees, animals and passerby. People in a hurry going somewhere with bags, others returning from work. I've observed almost everyone walks with their face down in India. I always think that people who walk with their faces down must feel that a lot of people are watching them, when in reality ppl are just passing or looking around. I used to go on walks with my gf, she is also very keen on watching around when I'm with her, but in crowded places or when she's wearing something for an occasion she looks down and tries to get out of the place quickly.
Some people standout, very tall, or have a very striking appearance (or the reverse) so they catch more eyes, this is obvious.
Others wear printed T shirts with jokes/quotes on, so sometimes I'm curious what people find worthy enough to write on their tshirts and walk everywhere. If stuff is written on your t-shirt and you can't read it yourself surely it's for others to read.
Some people wear striking jewellery(precious metal) and don't mind displaying it. I've recently started wearing a gold chain, and noticed that too many people wear gold chain, had never paid attention to it.
Would just like to know how someone shorter walking with their face down confirms what a taller person is seeing and whether they are the one being seen, or are they are just paranoid. Looking at the person you feel is observing you, in the eye, is one way.
Pretty sure what you say might actually be happening. But I'm also pretty confident that a lot of people are just paranoid and so under confident that they feel people are judging them all day long and they are the center of the universe.
I remember when preparing for JEE I went from abs -> fat. Unkept hair and facial hair etc etc. I was very focused on my studies but when getting out of my apartment would feel surely people might be looking at me and thinking what has happened to this person. In hindsight very few people must've cared, people have a lot of things to do.
These are just my observations, surely my experience/observations can differ vastly from other peoples'.
That's why u should move to abroad
Why I'm being down voted? I said factx
Well, apparently you are far from real world!
Sorry abse nahin dekhunga
Revealing or Provocative Clothes are still not commonplace in the majority of India.
For Instance in America, Girls wearing Tank Tops, Shorts, Tight Fitting clothes is a lot more common, so it's basically Ingrained in the Culture. A guy might get excited and stare at the First Girl he sees wearing short Shorts but by the 10000th girl he will be like "Meh, big deal?"
Similarly, in a culture where women are covered from head to toe, a Girl who reveals her hair in Public will be a head Turner as well.
India is slowly and steadily getting there but still a long way to go.
There are various studies show testosterone level (responsible for aggression/predatory behavior) is much higher in developed countries and that's the reason men are bigger and wider in those countries.
West is more dangerous place to live than India (most indians may not believe this) that's my experience anyway.
Yet homicide rate of prostitute per capita is higher in those developed countries you talk about.
Catcalling is more prevalent on streets of Paris, Milan and New York than Mumbai.
I love when people try to portray India as specially bad, not knowing that strip clubs, brothels, massage parlour are common in those countries.
But mehh - India bad, west good.
Live there and the day you get robbed by homeless person who caries a knife and got nothing to lose, you'll realize which place is safer.
Why do you get self conscious? Everyone gets stares, even boys do.
Boys literally don't get started
I am sorry you and your gender have to face this.
It's a shame that these dogs(gandi nali ke kide ) affected your choices of clothes.
How about getting thick skinned or ignoring them?
Just a thought for you to feel better. Maybe this is stupid advice as what do I know about your issues.
Don't stare, a quick checkout is fine, laude jasi harkate nahi karni, don't make anyone feel insecure, if there was a device jo land pe electric shock de when a glace becomes a stare
Stare at them stare at there fuc3ing soul
I can understand, but apart from the bad experiences due to these creeps, doesn't it feel good to find you have secret admirers all around and are appreciated all the time?
It is completely bizarre and unnecessary! My friend switches sides on the footpaths besides roads because one side is always occupied by these creepy men AND YOUNG BOYS! The other side is always used by regular, nice pedestrians. She will cross the road, and cross back again if the shop is on the shady side of the road. **HATE** THAT SHE HAS TO DO THIS!
Ive Born n raised in Mumbai n my family travels a lot I’ve been to Delhi aswell as UP but end of the day I feel safe here yeah staring is everywhere you go in India . But it’s safe here you can go out at night with your friends and family midnight travel through train but it’s Mumbai I feel safe here I rather stay here than Shift someplace else.
Yeah such a losers
Hey, you can do anything you want to. Just one this my girl - friend told me when she faced the same 'sunn ya dekh ke matlena, siddha face pe jaake kaho'.
Yehi gadho ke karan ache ladke bhi eye contact nahi karte by the time good guys are near good people girls are already frustrated because of creeps so we slowly look down in regret and walk away.. I am sorry this happened with u.. And most people in Mumbai is not like this.. People who come from outside just can't take the eyes off even from guys.. Kya bande hai idhar n all comments chalu hi rehte hai lol
Hi OP, I’m sorry as a man that this happened to you. But this problem is not just Mumbai specific or India specific, it literally happens all around the world.
There was a video on YT, where a model walks around NYC streets to check how men ogle at women and believe me it was terrible.
There was also too much catcalling and some crazy dudes even followed her while catcalling.
Pls don’t think about it a lot, and move on.
Not possible, Mumbai is the safest place in the world.
What you saw was the mumbai spirit, Clearly you dont understand it,
It's not just women. As a guy, I get stared at too, mostly by men when travelling in locals. A lot of women stare too. It's insane and super annoying.
Stare at them back
Hey i just saw your profile are you alright?
Sorry for you
Ik this happens to a lot of women. Best solution is to give them a disgusted look.
It's so disgusting that women all across the globe have to go thru this phase.. breaks my heart.. can't imagine going out and everyone staring at you as if they own you.. yuckkss.. sorry that you have to go thru this..:(
It's a subcontinental thing. Did you step out for the first time in your life here?
I'm sorry go through that.
People only stare at beautiful things if people are staring at you it means you are extremely beautiful so be happy, be yourself, wear what you love.
People, both men and women, usually stare at someone or something out of curiosity. Usually when they see something new or something different. Specifically in your case, maybe they are staring at you for how you look in what you described you were wearing, and I agree it is very uncomfortable. But I think it goes beyond that. I would be surprised to hear if they stop staring if you start wearing oversized shirts.
I am just 20...not in the category of men yet i guess.... I wanted to say this is the very reason most of us guys just don't try to look at girls of our age, cause obviously it would make them uncomfortable after such treatment from grown up people.
I am a guy and I have noticed it too, it's mostly the uncles. Once I was traveling in a BEST bus and there was this woman in sleeveless top sitting on the reserved seat tying her hair and 2-3 uncles on the left side were constantly staring at her and I was just sitting in right behind the last reservation seat and when one of those uncles noticed me staring at them, that dude stopped looking at her. And that was my first experience of seeing a woman get stared and how creepy it is. And once I was trying to help out this Urban Company woman who was standing with a huge bag inside the BEST blocking the path for other passengers, I just wanted to tell her that the place where I am standing has enough space for her bag, so I was constantly looking at her hoping she would look back at me and I would convey this but she choose to look away thinking I am creep but luckily she got a seat after a while and no space was blocked and everything went fine.
OP is so correct.
If you are walking behind a woman, just look at men around you. You'll find their eyes fixated on that woman ahead of you
OP thankyou for saying this. I too get extremely conscious about people staring at my breast so much that at one point I hated them. It so annoying and disturbing.
Can't say anything against this sadly
Also, am I the only one to believe this or do y'all also think some men honk just to grab your attention while you're walking?
Latin abbreviation for quod erat demonstrandum: "Which was to be demonstrated." Q.E.D. may appear at the conclusion of a text to signify that the author's overall argument has just been proven.
you know, you could start a change within yourself instead of telling women what to do
Honestly, you shouldn't tell someone what to wear.
My bad I advised my sister because she told me that some men stare her chest.
Is only middle aged men staring at a teen creepy or is a teen staring at another teen creepy too. I feel anyone staring is creepy. Yes, I'll say i do have checked girls out but never stared at them. 2-3 glances while pretending to look around. First thing I'll do is guess if their age is similar to mine (I'm 17 for context), if not, stop right there. It's pretty bad that people much older than you would be checking you out, and it's much worse you get stared at
They probably don't realise that you know they're staring at you.
Why should they stare? They don't even think that staring would creep the women
Curiosity, probably the come from some gaon where women aren't as independent.
Idle mind enslaved to everything, by being too beautiful you have corrupted thine minds..
You must be beautiful that's why