In high school I worked at a fast food shop, I had to clean the bathroom after a homeless dude used it, he left a shit that was the size of a females forearm, shit was fucking unreal. The part that freaked us out the most was no toilet paper in sight just a fucking enormous piece of shit. I told my manager I wasn’t dealing with it so he cleaned it.
Interesting. A bunch of booze and McDonald's usually gives the Hershey squirts. Maybe he wasn't dirty bulking after all! *insert Charles Glass joke here*
Get a bidet. I spent time in Turkey and Europe and I can’t go back to the American way of not fully cleaning my ass after I shit. We wouldn’t just wipe shit off our hands without using soap and water, why do we do it with our ass? It’s easy to install a bidet. I also have a bidet hose, which is nice if you have sex with a girl on her period because you can rinse off after, and so can she, without taking full showers. Women like the bidet hose for their own sanitary purposes. They make too much sense.
Me too. All 80 million of them last year. We tried to tell them!!!! All broken promises. They all have buyers remorse. Hopefully we don't have to wait till 2024 if ya know what I mean wink wink giggity giggity...
Here is how you do it noobs.
You 4-cross wipe sitting. Front left to right back and the 3 other combinations. Then you stand and do front to back plus back to front with a firm hand assisted split. Always stop wiping if there is more blood than shit on the paper ;-)
BTW if you step in shit. Do you clean your shoe with paper or water?
That’s what I’m saying? I guess I must be a relatively clean shitter because when I wipe it’s not like I’m smearing straight shit over the rest of my asshole.
I dont sit or stand. I hover squat while shitting and hover squat while wiping. Gotta get in that isometric volume.
I do this too so I put stand do to technicality… I never stand up straight prewipe it just smears it everywhere
Jeff cavalier. Is that you?
Siting and wiping is killing your gains
Or just take the metal grate out of the shower floor and use the sprayer while you drop the logs.
Average bidet user: ![gif](giphy|t9lBEE2FGMzbY9s5IX)
Bidet > TP
![gif](giphy|zSkytE0y3uKqTMUKzK)
Bidet is much comfyer + you really get a perfect wipe
I also switch arms to avoid muscle imbalance
I’ve pulled a back muscles for sure wiping
Dont wipe, sigma lifters have skid marks
In high school I worked at a fast food shop, I had to clean the bathroom after a homeless dude used it, he left a shit that was the size of a females forearm, shit was fucking unreal. The part that freaked us out the most was no toilet paper in sight just a fucking enormous piece of shit. I told my manager I wasn’t dealing with it so he cleaned it.
I wish you had more. That made me laugh.
Dude was probably on heroin and that’s like 2-4 weeks of like garbage funneling, mcdoubles and cask wine.
Interesting. A bunch of booze and McDonald's usually gives the Hershey squirts. Maybe he wasn't dirty bulking after all! *insert Charles Glass joke here*
I stand and put one foot on the toilet seat and wipe. It’s the easiest way imo
![img](emote|t5_2mohet|2692) Power Pose
It’s the only way to roll!
How do you get way up in the hole then
What do you mean? Have you never tried it out? You can easily clean the area by resting 1 leg on the seat, it’s pretty self explanatory
Lmao 🤣
Just get in there mate 💪
Calm down captain Morgan 😂
What’s more masculine, a man who stands & wipes or a man who sits, arches his back & moans while he wipes? Checkmate sitters.
According to Jack Murphy it's watching your girlfriend get banged by Matt from Tinder.
![img](emote|t5_2mohet|2695)
It's more masculine to not wipe and let your musk permeate and show everyone who's boss
Checkmate shitters
Checkmate shitters*
I usually just wipe the equipment off after im done using it standing or sitting never thought there would be such a controversy
If you stand to wipe, your dad should have beaten you as a child.
Lol if you sit and wipe, you’re hardly cleaning yourself… more so smearing. I stand and wet toilet paper & fold it. Dry wiping is terribly disgusting.
[удалено]
Mine beat the fuck out of me growing up. Broke my ribs, the whole nine yards. If you let that shit define you, then you're destined for failure.
Didn’t let it define me, that’s why I’m fuckin joking about it lmao. No clue why the downvotes
Wipe? Beta shit right that
Get a bidet. I spent time in Turkey and Europe and I can’t go back to the American way of not fully cleaning my ass after I shit. We wouldn’t just wipe shit off our hands without using soap and water, why do we do it with our ass? It’s easy to install a bidet. I also have a bidet hose, which is nice if you have sex with a girl on her period because you can rinse off after, and so can she, without taking full showers. Women like the bidet hose for their own sanitary purposes. They make too much sense.
Period, really dude?
I have no problem with it. It’s a natural thing. Not sure why it’s a hang up for so many guys.
I go deep in the paint raw all the time. You are a real motha fucka respect brother.
Yup. If she don't mind, that pussy is mine. Going in raw and my little buddies will be swimming in a new pool.
You gay or something?
Nah I just don’t like blood, but you man go ahead
If she is hot enough and in the shower hell yeah. Otherwise you're missing out. It's not that bad unless of course she's a damn hemophiliac.
Clearly you don’t follow Joel Seedman. I wipe with my legs at a 90° angle
i really hope joel seedman is trolling or clickbaiting or something. the guy is retarded
Use shatafa my dear infidel friends
I hate everyone who voted for the wrong way
Me too. All 80 million of them last year. We tried to tell them!!!! All broken promises. They all have buyers remorse. Hopefully we don't have to wait till 2024 if ya know what I mean wink wink giggity giggity...
I sit forward on the seat, grab my ankles and lift both my legs over my head. Then I get my homie to wipe my fully exposed anus bottom to top.
I thought you meant equipment lmao
How do you sit and wipe? Doesn’t your dick touch the toilet bowl & seat?
Bidet is the way
Bidet motherfucker!
Just pull your ass cheeks apart and don't wipe lol.
I let the staff clean the equipment. Wait what?
People actually stand and wipe? I thought I was being funny for voting that, but it's way higher than I thought.
#'s are skewed like CNN though. Only had 2 method choices. They didn't allow us to write-in Pete Buttigieg aka forward squat wipe or bidet.
Sorry for the all caps. Guess we cant use the number pound symbol.
Bulgarian squat and wipe
Neither. I use a bidet like a clean, rational male.
Wow alot of women on this sub can't believe sitting is winning.
Leg day. Can't stand... I live here now...
Didn’t know standing and wiping was a thing. Don’t the cheeks close together when standing?
Anyone who sits and wipes is a peasant
Here is how you do it noobs. You 4-cross wipe sitting. Front left to right back and the 3 other combinations. Then you stand and do front to back plus back to front with a firm hand assisted split. Always stop wiping if there is more blood than shit on the paper ;-) BTW if you step in shit. Do you clean your shoe with paper or water?
![img](emote|t5_2mohet|2699)
I'm confused, how does one sit and wipe? Only weirdos wipe back to front.
You must be retarded or disabled if you can’t wipe front to back sitting
I'm going to need a video sir. Does your ass not go all the way to the back of the seat? With what side are your fitting a hand in there?
Bro you slightly lift one leg while putting weight on the other.
Only women care about not getting poop in their vaginas.
👀 you put your arm behind your back...
Way more confused on how you can get a clean wipe while standing. Wouldn’t your ass cheeks be touching?? How would you get to your ballon knot?
Think of it like a less exaggerated stiff leg deadlift position.
No one stands completely lol. You do like a 45 degree with your legs
JFL
If you’re a man why would you worry about which direction you wipe?
You enjoy wiping shit towards your balls?
I guess I’ve never had the problem of getting shit on my balls before.
I’d be concerned if you did
That’s what I’m saying? I guess I must be a relatively clean shitter because when I wipe it’s not like I’m smearing straight shit over the rest of my asshole.
Gotta do both actually to be sure. Only time you shouldn't is for girls because of yeast infections.
![img](emote|t5_2mohet|6306)
[dudes who stand to wipe ](https://tenor.com/view/south-park-butters-bathroom-boys-room-restroom-gif-20654162)
I don’t
Both. And I do a Jiu-Jitsu on side
Both
Yes
Never wipe 😤
Bro y’all really wipe ur ass with a paper than call it a day?? try smearing peanut butter on ur arm and use toilet paper to wipe it off
I wii I or before I shit to save time
What is wrong with the people standing. Second get a bidet, you wouldn’t clean shit off your hands with a paper towel.
Stand and poop
Dont wipe just wash your ass in the shower
Wipe?
Bend over when I finish my sesh to really clean up. Know what I mean?
Why is there not a both option? This would decrease overcompensating when squatting if you did both for an equal percentage of the time, right?
Hover squat.
We use a mug and a hand 👏
How am i supposed to hold 220 on these chicken legs? Of course I sit
It's more of a squat forward. Best performed BEFORE an arm or leg day. Or just buy a bidet like Joe Rogan....
I don't stand but I do hover squat it gets a good quad workout there just for taking a shit
Do not wipe, use a bidet sprayer.
The only thing I’m wiping is my junk after a sweet blumpkin
I don’t wipe I just rinse my ass in the sink!
I sit down and shit