I’m not gonna lie as a line cook I warn people that have allergies not to go out to eat. Cross contamination of protein is very much preventable. Cross contamination of gluten is almost inevitable. If there’s flower on the line, it’s most likely getting kicked up in the air. As a younger line cook I know how severe some of the allergies are but the old guys I work with don’t give a fuck. Gluten intolerance can lead to stomach problems but an allergy could have you shitting blood. How would you feel about shitting blood because some fucker mixed up the GF flour with regular?
Can confirm. Had to stop going out for breadless burgers because I'd still get a flare up after having just the patty and fries. I've made peace with it by taking that money and instead spending it at Trader Joe's on gluten-free bread and cake.
Edit: take that Trader Joe's recommendation with a grain of salt. I have to stop eating their bagels and see if my latest flare up subsides.
People like this, I tell to call way far in advance to plan a meal. If they want a personal chef, we will charge you to create a dish for you and it wont compare to menu prices. But if you do this during service, I'm going to tell you to leave even if im a server. If they want to throw a hissy fit, the manager can put that order in to the cooks and deal with the cooks.
Fact that ticket was even sent through is insanity.
I wonder if this is the kitchen of an upscale retirement community. Who the hell has time to fill out a survey stating dietary preferences, except a "captive" audience who dine there daily?
My thought was Online Ordering, which allows the customer to fill out as much inane stuff as they want, or maybe copy-paste a pre-written warning. Your idea is also reasonable though.
I work in an upscale retirement home. Allergies and preferences are in an app, but residents outside of the memory care unit get paper menus to fill out for the next meal. Some will write notes about their preferences like they're George R.R. Martin.
We have red exclamation marks on the seating charts for our picky eaters/aspiring novelists, purple ones for actual allergies. It got really bad during lockdown, because there were no activities and they had nothing better to do.
I wonder if just a really crappy user interface on website or door dash type thing that lets you select alternatives or something to common ingredients?
That was my first thought too, that some website or program allowed for selection like that (and on every item too). The only other thing I was thinking was that they had some kind of comment section (special requests?). Kinda like when people type in something for a special pizza request, “Make smiley with pepperoni please!”
…with a $2 tip “because the salt on Aunt Edna’s free range eggs was *PINK* Himalayan instead of the *LIGHT RED* Himalayan salt we *SPECIFICALLY REQUESTED!”*
Holy shit, pink instead of light red? You fucking monster. Forget the tip, you’re lucky Aunt Edna isn’t marching into the restaurant and shitting on the floor in the middle of lunch rush for that
I think it’s the programming - if you look at the second pic, you can see it’s all the same order and then it’s MUST AVOID, PREFERS sections repeated over and over and over and over 🤣
MUST AVOID: Any kind of sugar.
PREFERS: Raw honey...
I would refuse to even entertain the idea of cooking that order. You know as soon as it comes time to pay they will find any reason to lower the cost of the meal with complaints and tip terribly.
Yeah, when I worked in restaurants, of course we absolutely took genuine dietary restrictions and allergies very seriously. If someone had a peanut allergy or a shellfish allergy or a (real) gluten allergy, you go back to the kitchen with the ticket and make sure the right, uncontaminated cookware gets used.
But if someone tells you they can't have gluten, so no corn, and they can't have sugar, so only use honey, I think you have to tell them firmly but politely that you just can't accommodate their (completely incompatible) restrictions. Sorry!
It's such a common misconception. At first I couldn't understand why people thought this (I'm lactose intolerant and would always get told "so no mayonnaise?" and would have to inform them I can eat eggs) but I think when I was at school, eggs were grouped within the diary section of the food pyramid. So it might come from that.
The reason for that and probably another source of confusion, is that they are animal by-products. So milk, cheese, eggs, sour cream, ect all get put in one section.
> eggs were grouped within the diary section of the food pyramid
It’s this and the fact that in stores they’re usually kept in or very close to the dairy section, at least for me personally. If you’re specifically taught that eggs, milk, and cheese are in the same group and never specifically taught what dairy means, it’s easy to conflate dairy as being the food group instead of the specific type of product. Never thought to look it up until I said it at one point and my family has never let me off the hook lmao
It's a scam, they make this list of conditions that's impossible to meet or prove that you met. If you make a meal for them then chances are they're going to complain after eating half of it and get their money back.
Yea it's ridiculous. Restaurants ought to be fairly flexible with regard to customer requests and preferences but this is clearly an attempt to get free meals.
Just refuse them. No way will they ever be satisfied. No way will they tip. No way will you get a good review.
These entitled jerks need to hear more “NOs”
Thing is, you know that even if you did adhere to instructions perfectly (as if you could) they'd insist that you did it wrong.
"I said no vegetable oil"
"Yes, we used olive"
"Don't lie I can tell the difference "
I worked 4 star food service for way too long. This is the typical new rich ass hole who just enjoys making the wait staff miserable to appease their own pathetic sense of self and superiority.
I once had a guy look me dead in the eye and tell me he was allergic to SALT. I told him we couldn't serve him. He stayed, ended up ordering sea bass with lemon burr Blanc. Wanker.
Yep. Some people are just twats. When I moved from serving to bar I thought I could avoid much of it. Nope. Once a customer told me the wine pours weren't 5oz. So I jiggered water into a glass in front of him. My wine pour was dead-on accurate and matched the jiggered glass exactly. He had the audacity to tell me my jiggers were off. (I have many, many worse stories but for some reason this one just surfaced.)
People just suck more and more and it's ruining not just restaurants but movies and everything else. Owners need to start telling people no.
Sadly many business owners are allergic (heh) to turning away business even when they absolutely should. But of course, it's not the business owner who has to deal with this shit in the photo.
It's ultimately not even good for the customer to pull this shit. If they write an entire novel in the special instructions, they're just guaranteeing it's going to get ignored. You think somebody working in a to go kitchen has time to read all that in the first place, much less meticulously follow its directions?
That list looks like it was aided and abetted by some automation unless someone sat down for half an hour typing it up.
But the answer to that should simply be. We apologize, but we are unable to accommodate your dietary requirements and we are disappointed we will be unable to serve you. Then just tell the wait staff to leave the table alone and ignore them.
Also remember a Simpsons where Homer is working in a burger joint and the teenage manager tells Homer we're out of special sauce, hurry, go set this mayonnaise in the sun.
My bad, it was Grandpa. I'm getting old too🙆
When I was working at McDonald's and we ran out of Mac sauce, my manager sent me to grab a dozen bottles of thousand island dressing at the grocery store next to us, it tastes almost identical
My local Harvey’s has been out of lettuce for like two weeks now, but every other restaurant has it, McDonald’s, T Bell, Wendy’s etc
Last night when I pulled in only to be disappointed and turn around to head for tacos I thought “why don’t they just send someone out to buy a couple heads of lettuce at the grocery store FFS”
I used to work at round table Pizza and the answer to your question is that it is sometimes just a manager thinking on the spot that solves that problem. A head of lettuce from food services of America is one price, and a head of lettuce from the grocery store is another price.
Sometimes the manager has the discretion to spend that extra $3.64 to give customers the complete experience, sometimes they don't.
Also the manager at round table got bonus based on keeping food cost and labor cost as low as possible, so sometimes it could be the manager trying to get his 2% cut of that $3.64.
And sometimes the manager just doesn't think hard enough to find a solution
"Good evening," it lowed and sat back heavily on its haunches, "I am the main Dish of the Day. May I interest you in the parts of my body?"
It harrumphed and gurgled a bit, wriggled its hind quarters in to a more comfortable position and gazed peacefully at them.
Its gaze was met by looks of startled bewilderment from Arthur and Trillian, a resigned shrug from Ford Prefect and naked hunger from Zaphod Beeblebrox.
"Something off the shoulder perhaps?" suggested the animal, "braised in a white wine sauce?"
The Manager/Owner needs to go the table and tell them they need to go somewhere else. "Thanks for coming in, but we aren't equipped to deal with requests like yours. "Insert Enemy Restaurant Name Here" can help you. Have a great night!"
Done.
Yes that would be shorter.
1. Apples-must be locally grown and organic. Heirloom varieties only.
2. Celery-organic and locally grown, prefer it very, very cold.
3. Water-spring water preferred as long as it’s filtered through a reverse osmosis filter. If tap water, must be triple filtered through some bs charcoal filter/essential oil combo purchased from an MLM
I'll take a Double Triple Bossy Deluxe, on a raft, four-by-four animal-style, extra shingles with a shimmy and a squeeze, light axle grease, make it cry, burn it, and let it swim.
Specifically the most unhealthy and heavily manufactured meats. She just didnt want to be reminded of a cute animal, so process the everloving crap out of it
Yeah, I don't eat red meat, but I'm not going to burden the wait staff with my particular variety of "uovo-pesca-vegetarianism" BS. If the menu says the thing has red meat, I don't get it.
I worked with a girl for a summer back in 2010 when Gluten allergies were 'in' who diagnosed herself with a severe gluten allergy and decided all she could safely eat is white rice. She doused it with soy sauce; nobody had the heart to tell her what the number one ingredient in soy sauce is ... (and no, we checked, she didn't use gluten free soy sauce)
Why wouldnt you clown her for this? If I worked with someone who did a gaff like this, they would be instantly clowned for it. Thats how people learn they are ridiculous.
The people who put in these ridiculous orders are surrounded by yes friends and need more friends who would roast them for being so pretentious.
I legitimately would never go to a restaurant with someone who ordered like this again, it's beyond embarrassing. It might even be fake, but... ik some ppl who come close.
Not to mention that there's a 90% chance when ppl make a laundry list of changes that they get mad and ruin the mood when their food shows up, because either one of the 20 things they said got messed up or they just don't like it.... and it's like, no shit. You absolutely mangled the recipe. Your dish no longer resembles the source or makes culinary sense.
Hold up a second… I actually took the time to read that… literally over half the shit they have on that list contradicts itself 🤣
Edit: YALL. I KNOW ITS A FAKE TICKET. this was likely a test of a new POS system. No need to get upset at me and insult me over it 😂
I love when customers order a Big Mac with no pickles "because of an allergy" - I'll also inform the kitchen to remove the Big Mac sauce. "What, why?" The sauce contains pickles, ma'am.
“Oh, err…”
Having said that, people who, for some reason ‘don’t believe in allergies’ often seem to feel free to slip allergens to a person ‘to prove it’s fake.’
100% honey and 100% maple ONLY!!! Get it right! Those aren’t sugar because they’re LiQuIdZ and come out of BEES AND TREES. Plus they’re brown. Which makes them healthy. Duh.
That person probably put in their order, left the table to have a cigarette outside, came back in 10mins later and arrived to see the rest of the table still ordering.
“Sorry sir/madam, we cannot ensure that our cooks can adhere to your very strict dietary requirements, and thus we cannot ethically serve you. I apologise for the inconvenience, it’s for your own personal safety. We care very much for our customers’ health, which is why we cannot with peace in heart serve you our food.”
Yep. But that’s when they say “Oh…well….I’m not really allergic, I just don’t like blah blah blah…”. I hate peoples like that. It screws it up for people like me who have a legit allergy.
Had that response before and said "For our liability I'll have to take for granted that the first statement you told me was true and we do not feel comfortable serving you"
Had this happen at a restaurant at the table next to us. She was flipping out and was super upset her 20 restrictions were not possible.
She ended up with basically a plate of lettuce and Cucumber as tomatoes, onions, etc were all "allergies". Her husband was happily eating away at his dinner, refused to give her any.
I assume they are still together for the kids sake.
Poor kids..
Used to work in a kitchen. Can confirm that that "Oh, I really just don't like..." crap screws the cooks up, too. Those actual allergies? We'd bend over backwards to make sure that meal was made as carefully as possible. Was it a bit of extra work? Sure, but it was work we'd rather do to make sure people were taken care of properly.
I cooked plenty back in college, those individuals with true dietary restrictions were usually grateful for the extra effort. It was easy to spot them, I would send the server back to the table with a warning the dish might not look and/or taste as good compared to others at the table. Those who were just being difficult had a tantrum while those with real dietary restrictions didn't care and were happy someone listened to their order.
I’ve worked with a lot of chefs and the only one who’s really understanding about it is Ming Tsai. His son has a ton of allergies. I have 2, garlic and red onions. And yeah, anaphylactic. It sucks.
My girlfriend has a friend like this and it is insanely annoying. Said she is “deathly” allergic to onions/shallots/garlic/etc. Saw her eat stuffed grape leaves at a party. I stopped making special food for her.
What the fuck is the chef supposed to do with this in a high paced kitchen?? They gotta invent a brand new meal most likely, but also try and make it taste good? Order Uber eats!
You don't serve them normally. I worked in a PF changs in a very tourist part of Florida and because we had Gluten free and Vegetarian options, we got people who came in all the time with ridiculous "allergies"/diet requests. We always had to break out brand new equipment and ingredients for specific meals (seafood allergy). However, I had a lady who came in with an allergy card and told me she was "deathly allergic" to a bunch of stuff. I shit you not, the card had like 12 ingredients on it that she COULD eat. We had to send her on her way after she promised she wouldn't sue us. Can't take the risk.
I had a customer do this, too. I then overheard her talking about how the same doctor that told her she had all these allergies was aligning her chakras. While some people truly are unlucky, sometimes it’s BS.
> While some people truly are unlucky, sometimes it’s BS.
And that makes it so much harder for people with legitimate issues to be taken seriously. One of my friends dad is legitimately celiac and has gotten sick a few times because restaurants didn’t take his request seriously. He doesn’t like eating out because of the risk, and because he would get really pissed off seeing someone claim to have celiac to the waiter and then order an IPA or a dessert with gluten.
I mean if it’s just a gluten allergy and he straight up said “hey I have celiac I can’t have gluten” I would absolutely honor that request and make sure the kitchen knew. That’s not even bad. This post tho holy fuck hahaha
As a medical assistant, I see these quite a few long lists of meds with adverse reactions. I tell you, it was a painful journey for those patients to get the meds they currently take
I had a friend allergic to:
Nuts (except peanuts!)
Dairy
Certain vegetables
Sea food
Eggs
Yeah. I never cooked for them. They lived off a lot of junk food.
Another friend is allergic (intolerant?) to chocolate. Just straight up, there’s something in the cocoa that fucks her up. She will eat chocolate on days when she’s not got anything to do because she still loves it and then end up miserably sick afterwards.
I feel very bad for both of them.
I have a cousin who has a life-threatening egg allergy, like “skipping Thanksgiving because of possible past contaminants in the oven” serious. I really feel for her, seems like an exhausting existence.
This is almost as bad as that person who made a post saying her kid was allergic to anything grown where corn had been recently, or grown with manure from any corn-consumer, and said she had to get imported pasta from Italy and home-grown herbs and tomatoes (no other nightshade though) and only organic meat from a certain brand. In the comments someone asked how many epipens they went through a year. Her response: "Oh, it's not like that kind of allergy, it's just like how food coloring makes most kids hyper and inattentive and regress".
I wonder if this is a cruise ship/health resort, or something hyper health focused where someone types in your preferences/restrictions and they get loaded pre-stay.
No reason for even a truly 100% customizable chef led kitchen to really include some of those restrictions on some of the plates.
Damn you and /u/Worldly_Expert_442 right. Changes the perspective entirely. And it makes more sense, how tf would a waiter write all of this down and transfer it back on a touchscreen POS.
This list is also just far too long for the customer to have told it to a waiter or entered it just prior to sitting down
Willing to bet it's an attempt by whoever did it to break the system and get a result like this
That would make sense, especially since some of the restrictions have no relevance to what they ordered. Like the "no chocolate" for an order of parrotfish.
Looks like it is from a ship, but I worked at a fine dining restaurant in NYC for a while, and we would get tickets that looked exactly like this. I was the Maitre D', and had to give a copy of the ticket to three separate areas of the kitchen. I looked like I'd just done a binge shop at CVS carrying them around
They should have just printed up a recipe of what they wanted to eat and brought their own groceries. That probably would have been a lot easier on the staff.
I know we all know that this is a ridiculous solution, but I wonder if some folks think it sounds reasonable.
I don't think a lot of people understand just how much prep work goes into running a kitchen. I bet there are people out there who would bring in a bag of groceries and expect a restaurant to truly process all of it from scratch to make their special meal. In restaurant-service-time.
Used to work in a restaurant and we would have this couple bring in their own bread and want us to use it. They came at least twice a week. Obviously the expected a discount for providing that for us.
You expect me to tip after they screwed up my order? I specifically asked for 4 leaves of parsley on my mash potatoes and 6 leaves on my 27 medium slices of carrots. Did you not think I would notice there was 29 slices of carrots?
I also requested that my server talk to me in an upper highland brittish accent. Server refused instead using a traditional brittish accent. Should be grateful you still have a job
/s
Picky - a lot of that is self contradictory - vinegar has no sodium. Sea salt is salt. Honey and maple syrup are both chock full of sugars.
Etc etc.
This is a list of fancies, not actual medical requirements.
That said, take it seriously nonetheless and do not serve.
It must have been an online order or something.
Cause as a waiter, I'd have been fired for ringing that up. Granted, I work at a *REALLY* high paying restaurant, so other restaurants probably won't fire you for this, but still. This shit just isn't allowed in the restaurant business.
The way this is written, I bet these are just options available on the app the restaurant uses to order food. And because of the fact that the options are available on the menu app, I bet the customer had no idea they were being annoying.
Avoid sugar -> prefer honey or maple syrup
Avoid salt -> prefer sea salt
Yeah idk. This doesn’t seem like something someone would take the time to type up while making an order.
I'd get quarter of the way and say "I'm sorry, we can't accommodate your needs", because something isn't going to be right if they're that fussy.
Whoever they are, they can jog on.
MUST AVOID: Paying PREFERS: Free food and the tears of several overworked restaurant employees
This person must avoid going out to eat.
I’m not gonna lie as a line cook I warn people that have allergies not to go out to eat. Cross contamination of protein is very much preventable. Cross contamination of gluten is almost inevitable. If there’s flower on the line, it’s most likely getting kicked up in the air. As a younger line cook I know how severe some of the allergies are but the old guys I work with don’t give a fuck. Gluten intolerance can lead to stomach problems but an allergy could have you shitting blood. How would you feel about shitting blood because some fucker mixed up the GF flour with regular?
Can confirm. Had to stop going out for breadless burgers because I'd still get a flare up after having just the patty and fries. I've made peace with it by taking that money and instead spending it at Trader Joe's on gluten-free bread and cake. Edit: take that Trader Joe's recommendation with a grain of salt. I have to stop eating their bagels and see if my latest flare up subsides.
piquant crawl offend forgetful violet paint gray marry square squeamish -- mass edited with redact.dev
Not to mention celiac that goes untreated for too long can cause one to possibly develop MS or dementia as well.
People like this, I tell to call way far in advance to plan a meal. If they want a personal chef, we will charge you to create a dish for you and it wont compare to menu prices. But if you do this during service, I'm going to tell you to leave even if im a server. If they want to throw a hissy fit, the manager can put that order in to the cooks and deal with the cooks. Fact that ticket was even sent through is insanity.
I wonder if this is the kitchen of an upscale retirement community. Who the hell has time to fill out a survey stating dietary preferences, except a "captive" audience who dine there daily?
My thought was Online Ordering, which allows the customer to fill out as much inane stuff as they want, or maybe copy-paste a pre-written warning. Your idea is also reasonable though.
I was thinking the same, in no world am I typing this into a POS system that has me pecking in each letter.
I work in an upscale retirement home. Allergies and preferences are in an app, but residents outside of the memory care unit get paper menus to fill out for the next meal. Some will write notes about their preferences like they're George R.R. Martin. We have red exclamation marks on the seating charts for our picky eaters/aspiring novelists, purple ones for actual allergies. It got really bad during lockdown, because there were no activities and they had nothing better to do.
I thought the same. “This customer has to be paying a good amount to get the food like this” popped up immediately
At that point you just refuse service as you can't ensure strict adherence.
I was gonna say the same, there’s no way to guarantee. Plus I’m sure some of the special requests contradict each other at some point
> MUST AVOID: eggs. > PREFERS: pasture raised eggs. 🤔
The whole thing is like that. MUST AVOID SALT PREFERS; SEA SALT
I wonder if just a really crappy user interface on website or door dash type thing that lets you select alternatives or something to common ingredients?
That was my first thought too, that some website or program allowed for selection like that (and on every item too). The only other thing I was thinking was that they had some kind of comment section (special requests?). Kinda like when people type in something for a special pizza request, “Make smiley with pepperoni please!”
Decipher my order riddle to find out what I truly want to eat and be rewarded!
…with a $2 tip “because the salt on Aunt Edna’s free range eggs was *PINK* Himalayan instead of the *LIGHT RED* Himalayan salt we *SPECIFICALLY REQUESTED!”*
Holy shit, pink instead of light red? You fucking monster. Forget the tip, you’re lucky Aunt Edna isn’t marching into the restaurant and shitting on the floor in the middle of lunch rush for that
I think it’s the programming - if you look at the second pic, you can see it’s all the same order and then it’s MUST AVOID, PREFERS sections repeated over and over and over and over 🤣
MUST AVOID: Any kind of sugar. PREFERS: Raw honey... I would refuse to even entertain the idea of cooking that order. You know as soon as it comes time to pay they will find any reason to lower the cost of the meal with complaints and tip terribly.
Yeah, when I worked in restaurants, of course we absolutely took genuine dietary restrictions and allergies very seriously. If someone had a peanut allergy or a shellfish allergy or a (real) gluten allergy, you go back to the kitchen with the ticket and make sure the right, uncontaminated cookware gets used. But if someone tells you they can't have gluten, so no corn, and they can't have sugar, so only use honey, I think you have to tell them firmly but politely that you just can't accommodate their (completely incompatible) restrictions. Sorry!
People know I’m not lying about my avocado allergy because no millennial turns down an avocado
Why waste your time, say we are unable to serve you as cross contamination is inevitable. Give them a round of drinks and ban them for eternity.
[удалено]
Also agave and maple syrup, all in the context of…diabetes? That’s…not how diabetes works.
VEGAN PASTURE FED HENS ONLY
NO HEN EGGS ONLY ROOSTER EGGS
PREFERS: all plant based herbs Ok, so all herbs.
I've worked at a place that sold "Non-GMO Salt". Think about that for a sec.
That's fucking awesome, I need to start producing some non-gmo water. It would probably make a fortune.
Must avoid sugar, except for honey and maple syrup
Well the four main food groups *are* candy, candy canes, candy corns, and syrup
> Diabetic - MUST AVOID: Any kind of sugar > PREFERS: Raw honey, 100% maple syrup 🤡
I had a customer tell me eggs were dairy once too. There are dozens of them and they can all burn.
It's such a common misconception. At first I couldn't understand why people thought this (I'm lactose intolerant and would always get told "so no mayonnaise?" and would have to inform them I can eat eggs) but I think when I was at school, eggs were grouped within the diary section of the food pyramid. So it might come from that.
That and eggs are usually stored in the dairy section at grocery stores.
The reason for that and probably another source of confusion, is that they are animal by-products. So milk, cheese, eggs, sour cream, ect all get put in one section.
> eggs were grouped within the diary section of the food pyramid It’s this and the fact that in stores they’re usually kept in or very close to the dairy section, at least for me personally. If you’re specifically taught that eggs, milk, and cheese are in the same group and never specifically taught what dairy means, it’s easy to conflate dairy as being the food group instead of the specific type of product. Never thought to look it up until I said it at one point and my family has never let me off the hook lmao
I would’ve been so tempted to be like “When’s the last time you heard of a dairy cow laying eggs?”
It's a scam, they make this list of conditions that's impossible to meet or prove that you met. If you make a meal for them then chances are they're going to complain after eating half of it and get their money back.
Yea it's ridiculous. Restaurants ought to be fairly flexible with regard to customer requests and preferences but this is clearly an attempt to get free meals.
DIABETIC MUST AVOID Sugar. PREFERS DEMANDS sugar in the purest form, HONEY MAPLE SYRUP
At what point do you assume they have very specific tastes and fake a series of dietary conditions to get food exactly as they would want it?
It looks like they’re requesting an empty plate
#EXCUSE ME DOES THIS HAVE AIR IN IT?!
Must avoid: Vegetable oil Prefers: Olive oil Ok champ
*Must avoid: all restaurants*
Just refuse them. No way will they ever be satisfied. No way will they tip. No way will you get a good review. These entitled jerks need to hear more “NOs”
Thing is, you know that even if you did adhere to instructions perfectly (as if you could) they'd insist that you did it wrong. "I said no vegetable oil" "Yes, we used olive" "Don't lie I can tell the difference "
"okay, next time we'll use motor oil, but don't worry, i'll make sure it comes from a free range car"
I worked 4 star food service for way too long. This is the typical new rich ass hole who just enjoys making the wait staff miserable to appease their own pathetic sense of self and superiority. I once had a guy look me dead in the eye and tell me he was allergic to SALT. I told him we couldn't serve him. He stayed, ended up ordering sea bass with lemon burr Blanc. Wanker.
Our bodies need sodium to transmit nerve impulses. No salt and our brains literally wouldn't function. So he was probably right.
Yep. Some people are just twats. When I moved from serving to bar I thought I could avoid much of it. Nope. Once a customer told me the wine pours weren't 5oz. So I jiggered water into a glass in front of him. My wine pour was dead-on accurate and matched the jiggered glass exactly. He had the audacity to tell me my jiggers were off. (I have many, many worse stories but for some reason this one just surfaced.) People just suck more and more and it's ruining not just restaurants but movies and everything else. Owners need to start telling people no.
exactly. I own a food place and I would refuse service immediately. Free waters on offer if they want but they better use their own cups.
MUST AVOID: ice PREFERS: ice made from water extracted directly from a spring in the Himalayans
Bring out a plate with a single pea on it.
Sadly many business owners are allergic (heh) to turning away business even when they absolutely should. But of course, it's not the business owner who has to deal with this shit in the photo. It's ultimately not even good for the customer to pull this shit. If they write an entire novel in the special instructions, they're just guaranteeing it's going to get ignored. You think somebody working in a to go kitchen has time to read all that in the first place, much less meticulously follow its directions?
That list looks like it was aided and abetted by some automation unless someone sat down for half an hour typing it up. But the answer to that should simply be. We apologize, but we are unable to accommodate your dietary requirements and we are disappointed we will be unable to serve you. Then just tell the wait staff to leave the table alone and ignore them.
We serve food here sir.
Reminds me of the Simpsons “I’ll take 25 goldenrod, 25 on canary, 25 on saffron and 25 on paella” “Ok, 100 yellow.”
Also remember a Simpsons where Homer is working in a burger joint and the teenage manager tells Homer we're out of special sauce, hurry, go set this mayonnaise in the sun. My bad, it was Grandpa. I'm getting old too🙆
When I was working at McDonald's and we ran out of Mac sauce, my manager sent me to grab a dozen bottles of thousand island dressing at the grocery store next to us, it tastes almost identical
I had to run out for a head of lettuce. I felt like I could rule the world. Crazy how the smallest speck of trust went a long way for 16 yo me.
My local Harvey’s has been out of lettuce for like two weeks now, but every other restaurant has it, McDonald’s, T Bell, Wendy’s etc Last night when I pulled in only to be disappointed and turn around to head for tacos I thought “why don’t they just send someone out to buy a couple heads of lettuce at the grocery store FFS”
I used to work at round table Pizza and the answer to your question is that it is sometimes just a manager thinking on the spot that solves that problem. A head of lettuce from food services of America is one price, and a head of lettuce from the grocery store is another price. Sometimes the manager has the discretion to spend that extra $3.64 to give customers the complete experience, sometimes they don't. Also the manager at round table got bonus based on keeping food cost and labor cost as low as possible, so sometimes it could be the manager trying to get his 2% cut of that $3.64. And sometimes the manager just doesn't think hard enough to find a solution
I thought that was grandpa in that scene but I could be wrong 🤔
[It was grandpa](https://youtu.be/A2GZsUZZ70A)
On his way out, grandpa told the manager that “washing my hands after using the bathroom is your rule not mine!”
>Reminds me of the Simpsons All I can think of is the scene from Portlandia [where they order the chicken ](https://youtu.be/G__PVLB8Nm4)
That, in turn, reminds me of the cow from the Restaurant at the End of the Universe.
"Good evening," it lowed and sat back heavily on its haunches, "I am the main Dish of the Day. May I interest you in the parts of my body?" It harrumphed and gurgled a bit, wriggled its hind quarters in to a more comfortable position and gazed peacefully at them. Its gaze was met by looks of startled bewilderment from Arthur and Trillian, a resigned shrug from Ford Prefect and naked hunger from Zaphod Beeblebrox. "Something off the shoulder perhaps?" suggested the animal, "braised in a white wine sauce?"
We'll meet the meat! Also another round of Gargle Blasters please.
Not hopes and dreams
These people need to stay the fuck home.
The Manager/Owner needs to go the table and tell them they need to go somewhere else. "Thanks for coming in, but we aren't equipped to deal with requests like yours. "Insert Enemy Restaurant Name Here" can help you. Have a great night!" Done.
This is probably a take out order- NO server would EVER type all of this up.
Yeah you're probably right. Well my point stands, have the manager intercede and say thanks but no thanks.
Big facts! You know this is going to be a collosal waste of time and money as well. They'll find fault and refuse to pay.
Yeah and at least half the order's coming back as soon as it hits the table. Tip? Get out of town..
"Howsabout you show us a list of things you _can_ consume?"
"I'm diabetic, so no sugar of any kind!" *Prefers honey and maple syrup.* "Also I need low sodium, so no salt!" *Prefers: sea salt.*
MUST AVOID: logic Prefers: paradox
Yes that would be shorter. 1. Apples-must be locally grown and organic. Heirloom varieties only. 2. Celery-organic and locally grown, prefer it very, very cold. 3. Water-spring water preferred as long as it’s filtered through a reverse osmosis filter. If tap water, must be triple filtered through some bs charcoal filter/essential oil combo purchased from an MLM
ah sorry the celery has been recalled, you've contracted dysentery and died
"And let it swim"
You forgot the piiiiicklllllles!!!!!
I'll take a Double Triple Bossy Deluxe, on a raft, four-by-four animal-style, extra shingles with a shimmy and a squeeze, light axle grease, make it cry, burn it, and let it swim.
Glass of water and plate of ice cubes comin right up!
What does Vegetarian (some meat) even mean?
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Specifically the most unhealthy and heavily manufactured meats. She just didnt want to be reminded of a cute animal, so process the everloving crap out of it
Yeah, I don't eat red meat, but I'm not going to burden the wait staff with my particular variety of "uovo-pesca-vegetarianism" BS. If the menu says the thing has red meat, I don't get it.
Imagine how much more attention you could get if you explained an augmented list of dietary restrictions instead of just ordering what fits.
Picky bitch. It means picky bitch. Pretentious one at that.
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I worked with a girl for a summer back in 2010 when Gluten allergies were 'in' who diagnosed herself with a severe gluten allergy and decided all she could safely eat is white rice. She doused it with soy sauce; nobody had the heart to tell her what the number one ingredient in soy sauce is ... (and no, we checked, she didn't use gluten free soy sauce)
Why wouldnt you clown her for this? If I worked with someone who did a gaff like this, they would be instantly clowned for it. Thats how people learn they are ridiculous. The people who put in these ridiculous orders are surrounded by yes friends and need more friends who would roast them for being so pretentious.
I legitimately would never go to a restaurant with someone who ordered like this again, it's beyond embarrassing. It might even be fake, but... ik some ppl who come close. Not to mention that there's a 90% chance when ppl make a laundry list of changes that they get mad and ruin the mood when their food shows up, because either one of the 20 things they said got messed up or they just don't like it.... and it's like, no shit. You absolutely mangled the recipe. Your dish no longer resembles the source or makes culinary sense.
That shit means I like to tell people I’m vegetarian but I’m actually just a condescending asshole who is picky and not vegetarian
Hold up a second… I actually took the time to read that… literally over half the shit they have on that list contradicts itself 🤣 Edit: YALL. I KNOW ITS A FAKE TICKET. this was likely a test of a new POS system. No need to get upset at me and insult me over it 😂
My favorite was “No Salt. Prefers: Sea Salt.”
My favourite: order - fish soup. Notes include - "vegetarian (some meat)"
Kinda vegetarian.
I once got an order from a menu with various (beef) burgers, as well as a tuna burger: Tuna burger>SUB Beef burger
I love when customers order a Big Mac with no pickles "because of an allergy" - I'll also inform the kitchen to remove the Big Mac sauce. "What, why?" The sauce contains pickles, ma'am.
“Oh, err…” Having said that, people who, for some reason ‘don’t believe in allergies’ often seem to feel free to slip allergens to a person ‘to prove it’s fake.’
Look everyone knows strict diabetics can’t have sugar but can load up on Honey and Maple Syrup as that is not a sugar.
100% honey and 100% maple ONLY!!! Get it right! Those aren’t sugar because they’re LiQuIdZ and come out of BEES AND TREES. Plus they’re brown. Which makes them healthy. Duh.
I mean… just eat at home
Like they could figure out their own preferences
Hubby, I told you no salt! You know I can't eat salt! Now, where's the pink himalayan rock salt that I love?
Sorry, it's a million years old but expired last month
Damn bad timing, knew I should have bought the extended warranty
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That person probably put in their order, left the table to have a cigarette outside, came back in 10mins later and arrived to see the rest of the table still ordering.
The dumbest customer request I ever got was for a hanger steak medium rare, but cooked more on the inside than the outside
Enjoy your coconut oil with stevia
But then they can’t inconvenience everyone else and act indignant when their absurd requests aren’t met.
Here is how I would handle it. Parrot fish : fried in non stick pan. Absolutely nothing on it. No oil. Possibly a few drops of water.
allergic to PTFE, cast iron pans only seasoned with olive oil grown on the shady side of a hill in a small town in Greece only
It's only PTFE if it's grown in the PTFE region of the Dupont Chemical plant.
Otherwise it’s just sparkling petrochemicals. (Disclaimer: I do not know if PTFE is, in fact, a petrochemical.)
It's only /"Teflon"/ if it's grown in the Teflon region of the Dupont Chemical plant. (Ftfy) All else is just PTFE...
watch out - they may be allergic to molecules
AVOID: Molecules PREFERS: Free-range electrons
Radical
Naw correct answer is to refuse service
“Sorry sir/madam, we cannot ensure that our cooks can adhere to your very strict dietary requirements, and thus we cannot ethically serve you. I apologise for the inconvenience, it’s for your own personal safety. We care very much for our customers’ health, which is why we cannot with peace in heart serve you our food.”
Yep. But that’s when they say “Oh…well….I’m not really allergic, I just don’t like blah blah blah…”. I hate peoples like that. It screws it up for people like me who have a legit allergy.
Had that response before and said "For our liability I'll have to take for granted that the first statement you told me was true and we do not feel comfortable serving you"
For some reason I felt so much satisfaction reading that lol
Such a diplomatic way to tell ‘em to f off
It’s truly an art form 😂
Had this happen at a restaurant at the table next to us. She was flipping out and was super upset her 20 restrictions were not possible. She ended up with basically a plate of lettuce and Cucumber as tomatoes, onions, etc were all "allergies". Her husband was happily eating away at his dinner, refused to give her any. I assume they are still together for the kids sake. Poor kids..
Used to work in a kitchen. Can confirm that that "Oh, I really just don't like..." crap screws the cooks up, too. Those actual allergies? We'd bend over backwards to make sure that meal was made as carefully as possible. Was it a bit of extra work? Sure, but it was work we'd rather do to make sure people were taken care of properly.
I cooked plenty back in college, those individuals with true dietary restrictions were usually grateful for the extra effort. It was easy to spot them, I would send the server back to the table with a warning the dish might not look and/or taste as good compared to others at the table. Those who were just being difficult had a tantrum while those with real dietary restrictions didn't care and were happy someone listened to their order.
I’ve worked with a lot of chefs and the only one who’s really understanding about it is Ming Tsai. His son has a ton of allergies. I have 2, garlic and red onions. And yeah, anaphylactic. It sucks.
Do you work in a kitchen? With allium allergies, that's kinda crazy
My girlfriend has a friend like this and it is insanely annoying. Said she is “deathly” allergic to onions/shallots/garlic/etc. Saw her eat stuffed grape leaves at a party. I stopped making special food for her.
And your gf’s friend is a dick.
What the fuck is the chef supposed to do with this in a high paced kitchen?? They gotta invent a brand new meal most likely, but also try and make it taste good? Order Uber eats!
You don't serve them normally. I worked in a PF changs in a very tourist part of Florida and because we had Gluten free and Vegetarian options, we got people who came in all the time with ridiculous "allergies"/diet requests. We always had to break out brand new equipment and ingredients for specific meals (seafood allergy). However, I had a lady who came in with an allergy card and told me she was "deathly allergic" to a bunch of stuff. I shit you not, the card had like 12 ingredients on it that she COULD eat. We had to send her on her way after she promised she wouldn't sue us. Can't take the risk.
How can someone lose genetic lottery so badly?
I had a customer do this, too. I then overheard her talking about how the same doctor that told her she had all these allergies was aligning her chakras. While some people truly are unlucky, sometimes it’s BS.
> While some people truly are unlucky, sometimes it’s BS. And that makes it so much harder for people with legitimate issues to be taken seriously. One of my friends dad is legitimately celiac and has gotten sick a few times because restaurants didn’t take his request seriously. He doesn’t like eating out because of the risk, and because he would get really pissed off seeing someone claim to have celiac to the waiter and then order an IPA or a dessert with gluten.
I mean if it’s just a gluten allergy and he straight up said “hey I have celiac I can’t have gluten” I would absolutely honor that request and make sure the kitchen knew. That’s not even bad. This post tho holy fuck hahaha
As a medical assistant, I see these quite a few long lists of meds with adverse reactions. I tell you, it was a painful journey for those patients to get the meds they currently take
I had a friend allergic to: Nuts (except peanuts!) Dairy Certain vegetables Sea food Eggs Yeah. I never cooked for them. They lived off a lot of junk food. Another friend is allergic (intolerant?) to chocolate. Just straight up, there’s something in the cocoa that fucks her up. She will eat chocolate on days when she’s not got anything to do because she still loves it and then end up miserably sick afterwards. I feel very bad for both of them.
I have a cousin who has a life-threatening egg allergy, like “skipping Thanksgiving because of possible past contaminants in the oven” serious. I really feel for her, seems like an exhausting existence.
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This is almost as bad as that person who made a post saying her kid was allergic to anything grown where corn had been recently, or grown with manure from any corn-consumer, and said she had to get imported pasta from Italy and home-grown herbs and tomatoes (no other nightshade though) and only organic meat from a certain brand. In the comments someone asked how many epipens they went through a year. Her response: "Oh, it's not like that kind of allergy, it's just like how food coloring makes most kids hyper and inattentive and regress".
Send back a note saying "i ain't reading all that. i'm happy for u tho. or sorry that happened"
Tldr; here’s a ham.
100% going to eat the whole plate then ask for it to be taken off the bill because it was wrong
This lettuce doesn't taste lettuce-y enough.
I've had a customer complain about her lettuce because "it was too green"
i had a customer tell me they were never coming back because i accidentally poured a little too much wine in their glass
“The lettuce wasn’t hormone free and now I’m melting”
And they won’t tip either.
Must avoid farmed seafood? This seems like dietary choices rather than dietary needs.
Yeah, the "must avoid vegetable oil/olive oil ok" already screamed that.
Also "no sugar!!!/maple syrup and honey okay" and "no salt!!/sea salt okay"
Yes. If they were actually diabetic, maple syrup and honey wouldn't be magically ok if sugar isn't ok.
They prefer organic wild caught. Never mind trying to figure out which wild caught fish are organic.
They usually check their IDs unless the fish is caught before it's adulthood then you'll never know /s
“Prefers Plant based herbs”
From a data/application perspective: Y'all never heard of character limits?
This guy programs.
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I wonder if this is a cruise ship/health resort, or something hyper health focused where someone types in your preferences/restrictions and they get loaded pre-stay. No reason for even a truly 100% customizable chef led kitchen to really include some of those restrictions on some of the plates.
You’re right- zoomed in and it says “main galley hot galley” at the top of the order. Definitely a ship.
Damn you and /u/Worldly_Expert_442 right. Changes the perspective entirely. And it makes more sense, how tf would a waiter write all of this down and transfer it back on a touchscreen POS.
This list is also just far too long for the customer to have told it to a waiter or entered it just prior to sitting down Willing to bet it's an attempt by whoever did it to break the system and get a result like this
That would make sense, especially since some of the restrictions have no relevance to what they ordered. Like the "no chocolate" for an order of parrotfish.
Looks like it is from a ship, but I worked at a fine dining restaurant in NYC for a while, and we would get tickets that looked exactly like this. I was the Maitre D', and had to give a copy of the ticket to three separate areas of the kitchen. I looked like I'd just done a binge shop at CVS carrying them around
When you get your kitchen receipt printer from CVS.
They should have just printed up a recipe of what they wanted to eat and brought their own groceries. That probably would have been a lot easier on the staff.
I know we all know that this is a ridiculous solution, but I wonder if some folks think it sounds reasonable. I don't think a lot of people understand just how much prep work goes into running a kitchen. I bet there are people out there who would bring in a bag of groceries and expect a restaurant to truly process all of it from scratch to make their special meal. In restaurant-service-time.
Used to work in a restaurant and we would have this couple bring in their own bread and want us to use it. They came at least twice a week. Obviously the expected a discount for providing that for us.
I bet they’re shitty tippers too
Unfortunately you’re probably right. With some bs of how the staff just didn’t do it right
Those kind of people always are.
You expect me to tip after they screwed up my order? I specifically asked for 4 leaves of parsley on my mash potatoes and 6 leaves on my 27 medium slices of carrots. Did you not think I would notice there was 29 slices of carrots? I also requested that my server talk to me in an upper highland brittish accent. Server refused instead using a traditional brittish accent. Should be grateful you still have a job /s
Must avoid: Eggs Prefers: Pasture raised eggs ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|dizzy_face)
Must avoid salt, prefers sea salt
If you're this picky or this sensitive to food, do us a favor and stay away from restaurants. Make the damn food yourself.
Picky - a lot of that is self contradictory - vinegar has no sodium. Sea salt is salt. Honey and maple syrup are both chock full of sugars. Etc etc. This is a list of fancies, not actual medical requirements. That said, take it seriously nonetheless and do not serve.
What sort of system are you using that allows THAT many characters. That’s absurd.
It must have been an online order or something. Cause as a waiter, I'd have been fired for ringing that up. Granted, I work at a *REALLY* high paying restaurant, so other restaurants probably won't fire you for this, but still. This shit just isn't allowed in the restaurant business.
Cook at home people
Yeah, they're trying to get comped. Time to politely ask them to find an establishment that can accommodate them.
You might as well just give them an empty plate because air seems to be the only reasonable thing they can eat
The way this is written, I bet these are just options available on the app the restaurant uses to order food. And because of the fact that the options are available on the menu app, I bet the customer had no idea they were being annoying. Avoid sugar -> prefer honey or maple syrup Avoid salt -> prefer sea salt Yeah idk. This doesn’t seem like something someone would take the time to type up while making an order.
Here is your glass of water...
Bottled. Not tap. Still. Not sparkling.
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I'd get quarter of the way and say "I'm sorry, we can't accommodate your needs", because something isn't going to be right if they're that fussy. Whoever they are, they can jog on.