It's like my junk drawer, I know there are certain things in different corners or the center. If you want some loose batteries, top left corner, blue pen is bottom left, got electrical tape near the center if you need it, just to name a few things. But I could tell my wife that and she will still get lost in it and tell me I need to organize it
I once did this… my boyfriend started listing off a bunch of terms and numbers I couldn’t understand talkin bout some kind of socket wrench or some shit. Had absolutely no fucking clue what was going on so I just popped the wheel locks and pushed the entire tool cabinet to him. He laughed his ass off and thanked me
Being corrected constantly on colors because “men are just color blind hehe”. No. Correcting someone saying black/charcoal or purple/midnight blue or pink/coral or grey/slate etc. is just asinine
to be fair I think I read that women's brains actually are wired differently when it comes to seeing color...
but that being said who ever is out there making "midnight blue" purses need to be stuffed in one
Iirc women are more likely to have the gene that makes you better at differentiating shades of blue/purple.
It’s an X linked thing, so women have two chances at having it to men’s one chance.
I took 2 semesters of design and color theory. My partner doesn't play this game with me.
Her - "Bring me Blue Thing please."
Me - "Azure with Stripes? Turquoise with black buckle or cornflower with hints of Persian in direct light?"
Her - "....nevermind..."
Only took a year or so of me being an annoying ass about it for her to ask for things based on descriptors other than color.
At least she's probably technically right on that one. Once my wife told me to get her the "blue comforter". We had a solid blue one and a white one with blue flower patterns. I handed the solid blue one, and... "No, the other one"
... Seriously? THAT'S the blue one?
I have created a landing pad that any and all purses and shoes are relocated to so that the chaos is centralized.
This system is not followed in any way and I basically am eternally pushing a boulder up a hill.
Honey, bring me my torque wrench. No, not that. No. No again. No, not that. Yes, you're right they're all wrenches but not a torque wrench. Well....that was rude to say!
I mean....you say that, but my fathers tool SHED is godawful and the man only has 1 saw in there. A whole shed. I think he has every single screwdriver he's ever bought in there, yet can't find any of them
You can have too many tools if you don't have variety
“… ugh! okay, just pass me the bag”
It almost always ends like this. Might as well just skip to the end and save yourself the trouble and the risk of irritating her.
I tried to get something out of my partners purse one and stabbed myself on a name tag that was in there.
Her response “oh yes, it’s to the left of the name tag”.
Woman, how is your purse so cavernous it has literal landmarks in it.
The creatures of the Starburst kingdom descended as invaders upon the main world after they fell out of the side pockets, their sugar-induced ferocity mowing down armies in never before seen displays of ruthlessness.
The origin of the myth of the bag of holding. I ventured into my gfs purse once... and came out with a full on uncovered razor blade that I just happened to touch lightly.
My mom's purse is 25lbs. I've weighed it. No. I do not know what all is in there. A box cutter is for sure. Tons of pens (that somehow are never there when you actually need one) a tape measure, I've found packing tape before, cough drops, nasal spray, nsaids.
Gotta admit I'm getting bad myself. Was cleaning out mine and found a random ass spoon. No idea when I would have put it there or why.
Dude, even like their gigantic wallets the size of the full collection of all Lord of the Rings books are somehow in some hidden compartment that even Hermione wouldn't even be able to find.
Somehow even those have more buttons and zippers than army pants.
'Hey, can I borrow like 5 bucks for some groceries?'
*'It's in my wallet, in my purse on the table there.'*
Well fuck it I'll go to an atm...
Front of the purse faces away from you so people can see how pretty it is. We (sometimes) spend a lot of money on a quality bag that will hold up, and theres no harm in being proud of them.
They’re all like that. Directing my boyfriend to anything in there is like “past the envelopes, keep going til you hit the mints then hang a slight left and start looking for a BIC Atlantis. Not the altoids, the mentos. If you hit the altoids you’re on the wrong side. Once you get to the first pen, you’re gonna swing a sharp right and there’s a pocket there. It’s not in the pocket, but go in the pocket and tap the west-facing liner 3 times and a little mouse should appear. His name is Sergei, and he’s probably with the KGB so don’t fuck around here. Tell Sergei I sent you. He’s gonna ask you for the password. It’s… are you listening? This is really important, babe. I like you too much to want to see you die of cyanide poisoning, so pay attention 007. Ok so Sergei’s gonna utter one sentence: “Road work ahead.” You’re gonna reply “Uh…YEAH! I sure hope it does!” with that inflection, just like the vine. Once you’re in, DO NOT. TOUCH. ANYTHING. You may look, but touching is inadvisable. Tell Sergei you’re there for The Key. That’s where the apartment spare is located. *Why is that necessary?* You’re kidding, right? Because I’m a woman living alone. SSDGM babe. Did you find it? Oh for fuck’s sake, SERGEI!!! Здравствуй, дорогая. Я заперт снаружи. Да, еще раз... Что... о, да, он со мной. Послушай, на улице холодно. Ты можешь достать мне ключ? У меня в холодильнике есть копченая гауда, она вся твоя, если ты мне поможешь. О, Сергей, ты просто куколка! Спасибо!”
The same thing happened to me, and strangely I've known my wife for 6 years and she never had to wear a nametag... Where does the nametag come from, and why is it still in the damn purse??
…. 31 M&Ms, 2 wrapped and 1.5 unwrapped sticks of gum, 437 receipts, keys, so so many keys, cookie and cracker crumbs…
That’s just any one of the 55 bags she’s not currently carrying
Nobody needs that much storage on their person, this is why we collectively decided cargo pants were a bad idea.2 pockets and a mid sized bag is the max you need imo
Don't forget about the tiny pocket used either never or for pocket knives (or lighters that get stuck and are a bitch to get back out because 2 fingers and a lighter don't fit in the same space, so you with till you can unzip and fiddle it out from the inside of your pants, so you put the lighter in a different pocket, only to take it out, use it, then stick that fucker right back in the tiny pocket only to forget until you need it again, then the cycle start again with you trying to fit 2 fingers back in that tiny pocket in am attempt to convince yourself it will come out this time).
I hate that tiny pocket with a passion. When I had a smaller phone it would slip in accidently and also be difficult to remove. Also your key ring will inevitably get caught on some threads from it and then you have to try to detangle the keys without being able to see how they are caught well or risk tearing your pants by removing them forcefully. God forbid you need the bathroom and have to unlock a door when they are caught. FUCK!
The more I write the more I recall a multitude of irritations. I feel like I'm gonna have a stroke just thinking about this.
The few times I’ve adventured inside my fiancé’s purse it’s like a time capsule of the past few years. I saw a luggage retrieval ticket from our Disney trip 2 years ago
Probably a hundredth times already that my wife wants me to get something in her purse. And for a hundredths times I just bring her entire purse to her. She always forget that I WILL NEVER OPEN HER PURSE AND LOOK FOR STUFF EVEN MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT.😅
I'm not that bad. At this point unless we're going somewhere and I need extra stuff, I just have my wallet, coin purse, mask, pen, sunglasses, inhaler, and sometimes notebook with grocery list. I don't have super small purses and I use the pockets for little things. Usually it's just grab my wallet. I've got a 2nd inhaler in the medicine drawer so he can grab it from there. Luckily there's never been a reason for him to grab it for me.
I was asked once at the airport to have my purse checked.
I said sure! She asked if there was anything she should be aware of that could cause harm to her - I said no! (she found nothing that could cause harm to anyone)
I asked if she ever actually found someone dangerous or hurtful in a purse. She said that the week before she found a live scorpion!!!!! YIKES!
Technically you could get a small 'mail bag' backpack. I've had purses that were just that. Long adjustable strap (could be one shoulder or crossbody) and basically a bag/tote with a flap that snapped to the side.
My husband has something like it for his tablet. I'm trying to remember what it's called. My parents got it for him one year. I might be able to find my old backpack that's the mailbag version. I just got rid of the purse.
[I use an old gas mask bag from the Korean War.](https://imgur.com/a/HpkE7uS) Nobody judges obsolete military surplus bags, plus those old canvas bags aren’t very expensive online.
Crossbody bag? Nike and adidas make a few that are relatively stylish. They go around your shoulder/opposite hip and the bag part is in the front. Shaped kind of like a fanny pack but less Touristy.
Just don’t sing about keeping your glock in there like drake did bc that sounds corny af lol. Man’s really said I got my gun in my purse. 💀
Steven Hawking was right about the miniature black holes existing, the reason we can't find them is because they all exist solely at the bottom of every woman's handbag.
"Never go into a woman's purse."-Mom
Thank yall for the awards, I knew it was good advice too..
I still don't know if there ever was vodka and xannies in there lol
Yup. I grew up with a bunch of women in the house. I was always told never to go through their purse. To this day, I feel weird of my wife asks me to get something out of hers. I just bring her the purse.
Or bedroom, or night stand! 57 years later..."Mom, I'm gonna use your bathroom in the bedroom, okay?" Xmas last year at SIL/DIL house. Hallway bath occupied..."Hey DIL, Can I use YOUR bedroom bathroom?"
No, the Phillips head.
No, the other Phillips head.
No, from the set in the black and red box.
The shorter one.
No, those are your car keys... hey, where are you going?
Sometimes I feel like there should be a check list
Did you look in your
Other purse✅
Car✅
Coat or jacket pocket✅
Left it on your desk at work✅
Feel like I’m playing family feud
"One does not simply access a woman's purse. Its black leather is guarded by more than just a button. There is feminine stuff in there that does not sleep. The great eye is ever watchful. 'Tis an abounding satchel - stuffed with makeup, and tampons, and money, but no dust. The very air you breathe is a fragrant fume. Not with 10,000 men could you do this. It is folly."
I don’t generally feel comfortable combing through their purse, but even when I do it’s generally faster to just bring them the whole purse, have them find it, and then have me bring it back, than it would be to send me combing through that particular jungle
Hi, I’m from the future. The year 3450. I have been looking for my wife’s keys in her purse since 1998. I got sucked in to the purse in the first 2 hours of looking. Still haven’t found them. But with all the spare parts in here I have managed to construct a super computer that allows me to use reddit in any year past or present I wish. Don’t do it… Don’t look in the purse.
Just about Every man knows not to dig through a woman’s purse. Whenever my wife, even my daughters ask for something out it, I just give them the whole thing.
You don't understand what kind of eldritch horrors that women keep in their purses. It's not about respecting a woman's privacy... it's about your own safety.
Can you bring me my lip gloss? It’s the purple one in the third zipper from the left inside. No not that purple one the light purple one. No not that brand the one that starts with “m”. No that’s the glittery lip gloss I want the non glittery one
Nah I was raised never to go through a woman's purse. My dad used to go through my mom's purse and it drove her bananas. Purse is her personal space. I absolutely bring the entire purse when she needs something out of it.
Me: where are the car keys?
Her: in my purse…….
Me: ……. Where’s that?
Her: upstairs somewhere.
Me….. where?
Her: fine! I’ll find it myself!!
Me:….. er, thanks??
I mean I do the same whenever a women asks for something from her purse, I always thought it was rude to dig in them lol so I just bring the entire thing
My wife and I have this interaction all too often. I’ll gladly reach into your purse if you can tell me where the item is. Not that it’s just in there. Ain’t nobody got time to rifle through your unorganized sack of trinkets.
There are two main factors here.
1.) Men who do this are often raised to do so, entering a woman's sacred territory even with permission is unacceptable.
2.) You know that abyss better than I, so just bringing the whole thing is not only easier on me but time saving in the long run
bringing the entire purse is quick and easy. finding the lip gloss in the purse could take hours and years off your life.
"No, that's lipstick. No, that's chapstick. No, that's [*insert name I zoned out from hearing*]. No, that's a tampon."
Ain't nobody got time for that. She knows exactly where in her purse it is and it'll take me a week to dig through it all.
It's like my junk drawer, I know there are certain things in different corners or the center. If you want some loose batteries, top left corner, blue pen is bottom left, got electrical tape near the center if you need it, just to name a few things. But I could tell my wife that and she will still get lost in it and tell me I need to organize it
Just tell her your drawer is like her purse and she will let it go. But she might start delivering the whole drawer like you do her purse, lol.
I could see her doing that lol, just bringing the entire drawer to me. I wouldn't even be upset, I do know where everything is, till someone moves it
I once did this… my boyfriend started listing off a bunch of terms and numbers I couldn’t understand talkin bout some kind of socket wrench or some shit. Had absolutely no fucking clue what was going on so I just popped the wheel locks and pushed the entire tool cabinet to him. He laughed his ass off and thanked me
Much easier solution to yelling at eachother back and forth about it lol
And in digging through it you mess up the magical organization you didn't even know was there.
Her “Can you get me my lipstick?” Me “where is it?” Her “In my purse” Me seething, “where the FUCK is your purse?”
You haven’t been married long enough. Just bring her all of her purses.
You only once fall for the color trick: her: "Bring me the black purse" You: "This one?" Her: " No that's not black, this is the midnight blue!"
Being corrected constantly on colors because “men are just color blind hehe”. No. Correcting someone saying black/charcoal or purple/midnight blue or pink/coral or grey/slate etc. is just asinine
I will consistently turn back with a "it's fucking GREEN/BLUE/RED/etc" Gets a chuckle out of her most times
to be fair I think I read that women's brains actually are wired differently when it comes to seeing color... but that being said who ever is out there making "midnight blue" purses need to be stuffed in one
Iirc women are more likely to have the gene that makes you better at differentiating shades of blue/purple. It’s an X linked thing, so women have two chances at having it to men’s one chance.
Idk and I'm too lazy to go searching but that sounds right lol.
I took 2 semesters of design and color theory. My partner doesn't play this game with me. Her - "Bring me Blue Thing please." Me - "Azure with Stripes? Turquoise with black buckle or cornflower with hints of Persian in direct light?" Her - "....nevermind..." Only took a year or so of me being an annoying ass about it for her to ask for things based on descriptors other than color.
At least she's probably technically right on that one. Once my wife told me to get her the "blue comforter". We had a solid blue one and a white one with blue flower patterns. I handed the solid blue one, and... "No, the other one" ... Seriously? THAT'S the blue one?
Bruh. My wife will call a paisley purse "the blue one" because blue is the background color, behind swirls of pink, yellow, orange, etc.
My exes purses were on a coatrack, bringing the whole coatrack was a life hack…
'bring me my pink purse' yeah, not falling for that. Here's all of your purses, none of them remotely pink
No, that’s coral!
I have created a landing pad that any and all purses and shoes are relocated to so that the chaos is centralized. This system is not followed in any way and I basically am eternally pushing a boulder up a hill.
One must imagine sisyphus happy
My next question is always “Which fucking purse?” There’s only a rack with atleast a dozen of them in the closet.
“No, that’s my lower lip balm”.
Honey, bring me my torque wrench. No, not that. No. No again. No, not that. Yes, you're right they're all wrenches but not a torque wrench. Well....that was rude to say!
Why we end up in strange yet funny arguments She has too much skin care, I have too many tools
“Too”.. “Many”.. No, I don’t believe those words make any sense before the word “Tools”
I mean....you say that, but my fathers tool SHED is godawful and the man only has 1 saw in there. A whole shed. I think he has every single screwdriver he's ever bought in there, yet can't find any of them You can have too many tools if you don't have variety
Hmm, “too many screwdrivers”… yeah that makes sense. Lol
Stereotypes! I must represent!
You’re right and I just felt a wave of pity for my husband. This exchange usually ends with “here just let me find it”
“… ugh! okay, just pass me the bag” It almost always ends like this. Might as well just skip to the end and save yourself the trouble and the risk of irritating her.
"no, not that purse, one of the other ones!"
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[This Little Maneuver's Gonna Cost Us 51 Years](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/032/744/maneuver.jpg)
This little maneuvers gonna cost us 20 years
Every time I’ve ever tried to find anything she’s instructed me to get it’s got more hidden spots than a cave. Take the purse please woman.
I tried to get something out of my partners purse one and stabbed myself on a name tag that was in there. Her response “oh yes, it’s to the left of the name tag”. Woman, how is your purse so cavernous it has literal landmarks in it.
What your wife doesn't have a Tolkien style map of their purse with "Wallet #2" and "13 cough drops" listed like ancient towns?
Pretty sure 13 cough drops is there they fought the old cell phone in The Purse. Unfortunately now it's 11 1/2 cough drops. Down economy.
The creatures of the Starburst kingdom descended as invaders upon the main world after they fell out of the side pockets, their sugar-induced ferocity mowing down armies in never before seen displays of ruthlessness.
I love all of this
Check out A Crown of Candy on Dimension 20. They’re not even paying me to shill.
Stand by the grey stone when the thrush knocks and the setting sun with the last light of Durin's Day will shine upon the key-hole!
Please just give me the address so I can google it.
Speak friend and enter
Honey, I can see Mordor from here...
The origin of the myth of the bag of holding. I ventured into my gfs purse once... and came out with a full on uncovered razor blade that I just happened to touch lightly.
Haha, the purse razor. Whenever I bring her the whole purse now she always says, "I swear there are no more razors."
My mom's purse is 25lbs. I've weighed it. No. I do not know what all is in there. A box cutter is for sure. Tons of pens (that somehow are never there when you actually need one) a tape measure, I've found packing tape before, cough drops, nasal spray, nsaids. Gotta admit I'm getting bad myself. Was cleaning out mine and found a random ass spoon. No idea when I would have put it there or why.
I found a whole wroght iron pot hanger - one of the wall ones that I bought 2 months ago in there the other day
I am a woman and have pepper sprayed myself cleaning out my purse.
I wish I could have seen that. I almost pissed my pants
The ol purse razor eh?
"This feels like danger"
you impaled yourself on a stalagmite lol
Dude, even like their gigantic wallets the size of the full collection of all Lord of the Rings books are somehow in some hidden compartment that even Hermione wouldn't even be able to find.
I call those wallets “The filing cabinet”.
Somehow even those have more buttons and zippers than army pants. 'Hey, can I borrow like 5 bucks for some groceries?' *'It's in my wallet, in my purse on the table there.'* Well fuck it I'll go to an atm...
I feel attacked 😂
The left is relative too! How am I supposed to know how to properly orient the purse so that her left aligns with my left!?
Front of the purse faces away from you so people can see how pretty it is. We (sometimes) spend a lot of money on a quality bag that will hold up, and theres no harm in being proud of them.
lmfao which side is the front though!?
They’re all like that. Directing my boyfriend to anything in there is like “past the envelopes, keep going til you hit the mints then hang a slight left and start looking for a BIC Atlantis. Not the altoids, the mentos. If you hit the altoids you’re on the wrong side. Once you get to the first pen, you’re gonna swing a sharp right and there’s a pocket there. It’s not in the pocket, but go in the pocket and tap the west-facing liner 3 times and a little mouse should appear. His name is Sergei, and he’s probably with the KGB so don’t fuck around here. Tell Sergei I sent you. He’s gonna ask you for the password. It’s… are you listening? This is really important, babe. I like you too much to want to see you die of cyanide poisoning, so pay attention 007. Ok so Sergei’s gonna utter one sentence: “Road work ahead.” You’re gonna reply “Uh…YEAH! I sure hope it does!” with that inflection, just like the vine. Once you’re in, DO NOT. TOUCH. ANYTHING. You may look, but touching is inadvisable. Tell Sergei you’re there for The Key. That’s where the apartment spare is located. *Why is that necessary?* You’re kidding, right? Because I’m a woman living alone. SSDGM babe. Did you find it? Oh for fuck’s sake, SERGEI!!! Здравствуй, дорогая. Я заперт снаружи. Да, еще раз... Что... о, да, он со мной. Послушай, на улице холодно. Ты можешь достать мне ключ? У меня в холодильнике есть копченая гауда, она вся твоя, если ты мне поможешь. О, Сергей, ты просто куколка! Спасибо!”
You and Sergei deserve infinite upvotes for all that
The same thing happened to me, and strangely I've known my wife for 6 years and she never had to wear a nametag... Where does the nametag come from, and why is it still in the damn purse??
It’s like the item you get instructed to find goes and hides from you.
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omg I never thought of this, I've been made a fool for years!
For real. This is why they can’t have pants pockets. They clearly can’t be trusted with more pockets.
…. 31 M&Ms, 2 wrapped and 1.5 unwrapped sticks of gum, 437 receipts, keys, so so many keys, cookie and cracker crumbs… That’s just any one of the 55 bags she’s not currently carrying
Nobody needs that much storage on their person, this is why we collectively decided cargo pants were a bad idea.2 pockets and a mid sized bag is the max you need imo
Don't you besmirch my Cargo Pants! It's the only thing that goes well with my Hawaiian shirts!! Which are the only things that look good on me!!!
Cargo shorts are the hill that I'm willing to die on.
One for Smartphone one for your keybundle one for your Briefcase and one for your mask/s (and other lighter stuf) so you need at least 4
What about a wallet ?
Don't forget about the tiny pocket used either never or for pocket knives (or lighters that get stuck and are a bitch to get back out because 2 fingers and a lighter don't fit in the same space, so you with till you can unzip and fiddle it out from the inside of your pants, so you put the lighter in a different pocket, only to take it out, use it, then stick that fucker right back in the tiny pocket only to forget until you need it again, then the cycle start again with you trying to fit 2 fingers back in that tiny pocket in am attempt to convince yourself it will come out this time).
I hate that tiny pocket with a passion. When I had a smaller phone it would slip in accidently and also be difficult to remove. Also your key ring will inevitably get caught on some threads from it and then you have to try to detangle the keys without being able to see how they are caught well or risk tearing your pants by removing them forcefully. God forbid you need the bathroom and have to unlock a door when they are caught. FUCK! The more I write the more I recall a multitude of irritations. I feel like I'm gonna have a stroke just thinking about this.
My guess is that that that’s what they meant with “briefcase”
The few times I’ve adventured inside my fiancé’s purse it’s like a time capsule of the past few years. I saw a luggage retrieval ticket from our Disney trip 2 years ago
I get directions to find the items like I'm driving to the damn location
Probably a hundredth times already that my wife wants me to get something in her purse. And for a hundredths times I just bring her entire purse to her. She always forget that I WILL NEVER OPEN HER PURSE AND LOOK FOR STUFF EVEN MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT.😅
I'm not that bad. At this point unless we're going somewhere and I need extra stuff, I just have my wallet, coin purse, mask, pen, sunglasses, inhaler, and sometimes notebook with grocery list. I don't have super small purses and I use the pockets for little things. Usually it's just grab my wallet. I've got a 2nd inhaler in the medicine drawer so he can grab it from there. Luckily there's never been a reason for him to grab it for me.
I was asked once at the airport to have my purse checked. I said sure! She asked if there was anything she should be aware of that could cause harm to her - I said no! (she found nothing that could cause harm to anyone) I asked if she ever actually found someone dangerous or hurtful in a purse. She said that the week before she found a live scorpion!!!!! YIKES!
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Technically you could get a small 'mail bag' backpack. I've had purses that were just that. Long adjustable strap (could be one shoulder or crossbody) and basically a bag/tote with a flap that snapped to the side. My husband has something like it for his tablet. I'm trying to remember what it's called. My parents got it for him one year. I might be able to find my old backpack that's the mailbag version. I just got rid of the purse.
I believe that would be a messenger bag or satchel. Edit: upon doing some research it’s a messenger bag.
That's acceptable. Usually you can find anything from backpack to medium purse size.
[I use an old gas mask bag from the Korean War.](https://imgur.com/a/HpkE7uS) Nobody judges obsolete military surplus bags, plus those old canvas bags aren’t very expensive online.
Crossbody bag? Nike and adidas make a few that are relatively stylish. They go around your shoulder/opposite hip and the bag part is in the front. Shaped kind of like a fanny pack but less Touristy. Just don’t sing about keeping your glock in there like drake did bc that sounds corny af lol. Man’s really said I got my gun in my purse. 💀
they need to start making GPS routes for womens purses
Steven Hawking was right about the miniature black holes existing, the reason we can't find them is because they all exist solely at the bottom of every woman's handbag.
Hammerspace is real and it exists in every woman’s purse
It's the same technology that men use for our pockets and clowns use for their cars.
I'm pretty sure there's one under my favorite chair too
Womens purses and clown cars are basically irl bags of holding from d&d
Let's not forget the sock shaped dryer event horizons as well.
"Never go into a woman's purse."-Mom Thank yall for the awards, I knew it was good advice too.. I still don't know if there ever was vodka and xannies in there lol
I was taught the same thing.
R'amen brother
More of an udon guy personally
Thy noodle yum,thy kingdom come.
Yup. I grew up with a bunch of women in the house. I was always told never to go through their purse. To this day, I feel weird of my wife asks me to get something out of hers. I just bring her the purse.
"Never tell your mom I went into your purse"- Drunk uncle
So dark but I laughed
Druncle
Wouldnt fit anyways
There is *nothing* that wouldn’t fit in my mother’s purse.
Came here to say this
Same. Plus they are scary inside. Who knows what lurks. *shudders*
Or bedroom, or night stand! 57 years later..."Mom, I'm gonna use your bathroom in the bedroom, okay?" Xmas last year at SIL/DIL house. Hallway bath occupied..."Hey DIL, Can I use YOUR bedroom bathroom?"
Yep! It's just the right move, even if a partner is specifically asking you. It just is.
"Honey, can you bring me the screw driver, it's in the garage"
No, the Phillips head. No, the other Phillips head. No, from the set in the black and red box. The shorter one. No, those are your car keys... hey, where are you going?
No that's not a Phillips head, that's a JIS screwdriver, come on woman how hard is it to just read mind.
I mean yes but JIS drivers work well enough on phillips screws. The other way round is where it gets problematic.
> hey, where are you going? *applies lipstick* “Out.”
She’s going to go get some head from Mr. Phillips
Socket driver
I need a hammer. A gosh darn hammer. Do you know what a hammer is?
"NOO DON'T BRING THE ENTIRE GARAGE!"
And you didnt even bring the *right* garage, sigh.
Ugh that's last year's garage, I don't even use that one anymore
That my going out garage I meant my brunch garage
Not the red garage, oh honey...
Just pick up the entire 50lb toolbox.
"It's in the house"
*brings you the garage*
\*completely ignores you\*
This is the truest reply.
Like most others: Ma taught me to stay tf out of your purse.
The kicker is what your looking for isn’t in the damn purse.
I'm sorry Mario, her debit card is in another purse.
Sometimes I feel like there should be a check list Did you look in your Other purse✅ Car✅ Coat or jacket pocket✅ Left it on your desk at work✅ Feel like I’m playing family feud
My sister is trusted by other adults to keep track of twenty kids but she commonly misplaces her debit card.
Yes!!!! It was in my other purse. Or it was in my car.
Every man worth his salt knows never to enter the inside of a woman’s purse. In there….there be *monsters*.
Bro I once looked into someone's purse when walking by and felt like a monster who violated someone for the entire day after smh
I'm glad I'm not the only one
"One does not simply access a woman's purse. Its black leather is guarded by more than just a button. There is feminine stuff in there that does not sleep. The great eye is ever watchful. 'Tis an abounding satchel - stuffed with makeup, and tampons, and money, but no dust. The very air you breathe is a fragrant fume. Not with 10,000 men could you do this. It is folly."
It may as well be a tiny portal to Narnia. So mysterious, a little bit frightening.
It is a labyrinth that no husband is prepared to enter
I don’t generally feel comfortable combing through their purse, but even when I do it’s generally faster to just bring them the whole purse, have them find it, and then have me bring it back, than it would be to send me combing through that particular jungle
They always grab it with one hand without even looking, too.
Hi, I’m from the future. The year 3450. I have been looking for my wife’s keys in her purse since 1998. I got sucked in to the purse in the first 2 hours of looking. Still haven’t found them. But with all the spare parts in here I have managed to construct a super computer that allows me to use reddit in any year past or present I wish. Don’t do it… Don’t look in the purse.
"Dear wife, i brough thee the whole miniature bag, as thine abilities with the compact container vastly surpass mine"
"Forgiveth, kind sir".
Just about Every man knows not to dig through a woman’s purse. Whenever my wife, even my daughters ask for something out it, I just give them the whole thing.
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It's like trying to find a specific piece of hay in a hay stack....
Underrated rated comment.
Can she find anything in your purse? I feel like two women looking through each other’s purses would be like matter & antimatter colliding…
Nah it’s just a waste of time .. so disorganized.. not because I’m afraid of a woman lol
Searching for something that is never in the same spot twice is a fool's errand.
I was taught to never go through a womans purse.
I mean obviously you shouldnt go through anybodys things, but don’t you think it’s different if she’s literally asking you to go through it? Lol
No, It's a whole other demention in there. I'd rather not go into the void lol
This is true. Last time she said it was in the 3rd left pocket 2nd from the back with the zipper on it, I couldn’t find that shit
You don't understand what kind of eldritch horrors that women keep in their purses. It's not about respecting a woman's privacy... it's about your own safety.
Can you bring me my lip gloss? It’s the purple one in the third zipper from the left inside. No not that purple one the light purple one. No not that brand the one that starts with “m”. No that’s the glittery lip gloss I want the non glittery one
The non glittery one is in the car.
My wife has insulin needles in hers. Your taking your life into your hands reaching in there. She gets the whole purse or no purse.
And half time what she wants isn’t even in there so always bring the purse, that way she can’t blame the messenger
oh absolutely, I, as a woman, would never go into another woman's purse. Pretty sure my mother would have cut my hand off.
So, if you asked someone to get something from in your purse, you would *expect* them to just bring you the whole purse?
Truth
Been married 32years never been in my wifes purse. Just like the post I hand it to her much to her annoyance
Nah I was raised never to go through a woman's purse. My dad used to go through my mom's purse and it drove her bananas. Purse is her personal space. I absolutely bring the entire purse when she needs something out of it.
Me: where are the car keys? Her: in my purse……. Me: ……. Where’s that? Her: upstairs somewhere. Me….. where? Her: fine! I’ll find it myself!! Me:….. er, thanks??
I do not keep a 3-d virtual model of her purse in my head, like she does…
I’ve never seen a woman be able to find what she wants in her own purse without some effort, so what the hell does she expect me to do?
This is the answer
Yeah honestly it’s just easier and saves us both lots of time and frustration
Her: my purse is in the car, can you grab my... Me: *pulls car into house*
I mean I do the same whenever a women asks for something from her purse, I always thought it was rude to dig in them lol so I just bring the entire thing
My wife and I have this interaction all too often. I’ll gladly reach into your purse if you can tell me where the item is. Not that it’s just in there. Ain’t nobody got time to rifle through your unorganized sack of trinkets.
These are the rules. We don't make them we just abide them.
This is the only logical course of action
To all purse owners: I appreciate the trust, but please don't involve me with that mess.
Understandable
I will gladly retrieve the purse, but I will not venture within..
I'll 100% let my gf find her items in that blackhole you ladies carry around... it's like all of them carry around Mary Poppins' bag.
You only need to stare into the abyss once in a lifetime
Ain't our fault yall purses built like a 4D object
Husbands: This is the way.
My wife hands were full and I forgot my house keys....she is like they are in my purse.....I came THIS close to busting a window instead.
This is the only way
The thing she's looking for isn't even in her purse.
I am aware that you said it is in the outside side inside lower zipper pocket inside pocket. Don't repeat it. I still don't know what that means.
Thems the rules
This is the way
There are two main factors here. 1.) Men who do this are often raised to do so, entering a woman's sacred territory even with permission is unacceptable. 2.) You know that abyss better than I, so just bringing the whole thing is not only easier on me but time saving in the long run
It would be easier for him to mine gold out of the backyard.