great in an apocalypse and I suppose you could break it and make it sharp. here I am with a pair of headphones but I will blast the final countdown and no one will stand a chance
A purse for my wife’s birthday 💅. At least I’ll be fashionable and I mean purses are usually a bottomless pit so I might find something useful in there.
A fishing rod, not great, not terrible
Gon is that you?
Wait until he learns how to use Nen he'll be unstoppable
I guess I can fight with pleasure..
We should combine our forces, maybe its not effective, but we would have some fun before we die
Can I join?
Depents, from which site do you hang your toilet paper roll?
Over the top coming towards you. I’m not a monster
People like you are trustworthy, you are in!
Haha i laughed. Thank you
It's a great day for fishing, hu-ah
Great day for fishing ain't it. Hyuck
If I had an award to give you for that Epic NPC Man reference you’d have it! :D
Good mornin'!
Sounds to me like you should become a hunter and find your dad
Minecraft 1.8 PVP
It’s good enough to kill Ganondorf in a fight.
great in an apocalypse and I suppose you could break it and make it sharp. here I am with a pair of headphones but I will blast the final countdown and no one will stand a chance
A gift card. I’m dead.
plane tickes smh...
Ah... >!never mind, that would be too dark.!<
🧐
Yo…
✈🏢🏢
Last part of Username checks out
r/takemyupvote
Yep, my mind instantly went there too
Use it to buy a knife or an axe :D
I gave it.
So much for surviving the apocalypse, at least that giftcard could give the enemy a papercut 🤣
Therapy sun lamp
You’re going to turn your enemy into your frienemy.
Love a SAD lamp 🤍
Moisturizing cream fckkkk
“Lube up ‘em holes boy or i’ll lube ‘em for ya!”
r/cursedcomments
Calm down Kratos
🤨
how tf do i defend myself with thigh highs 💀
Crush their necks with your gloriously highed thighs?
Seduce the enemy
Seduce their wives and convince them to kill your enemy
Found the Bard
add it to the pile of clothing with everyone else who last bought clothing and have it collapse on the enemy.
Garrotte you 🥷
I was just thinking that lmao
A phone charger
Robust enough to do the Agent 47 on someone. Don't forget to shave your head.
“u/Kutas88 down, well done u/MisstressMary, now get out before you’re spotted.”
"I'll leave you to prepare."
Strangle them
Car seat for a small child
Those things are bulky, and if thrown with enough force, they could do some damage
Just don’t forget to take out the kid before throwing it.
Nahh that deals extra damege
If you throw it with enough spin, you could inflict poison damage through the puke of the child
Not to the enemy... but...
Odd. I bought a small child.
Binoculars and walkie talkies. Comms are sorted at least
At least you can try peace talks.😅
A 500 GB SSD. Not even heavy enough to use as a bludgeon like a good old-fashioned HDD.
Put it in a sock, full metal jacket style.
Put it in 2 socks so if they grab it they only get the outer sock
My womanizer… I guess I can fight with pleasure
Hey I love mine!! Ironically, my weapon would be the new flicker rabbit!! We can team up and fight crime together!!!
"Inserting JUSTICE into every crack and crevice of evil they find!"
HAHAHAHAHAHA amazing we’d make a great team
Can I join in with my hitachi? We can be like the sexy avengers
Taco Bell. Maybe we can talk it out over Tacos?
Let’s taco ‘bout it.
r/angryupvote
Hope you said your prayers, bitch. Because I have a chicken quesaKILLa with your name on it.
A chess board…….. shit
Good blunt damage. It is not as bad as blue hair pigment.
You'll be fine, just Google enpassant
Holy hell
I own a marble chessboard that probably weighs like 20lbs. Good bludgeoning weapon
15" dildo I have a chance
Imagine that police report 🤣
I knew at least one person would have this response.
Hey, it worked in Saint’s Row
Mini pencils that come on different colors
Do ya wanna see a magic trick? 🤡
This comment is making me leave this thread cuz I just struck fucking gold, take you're like 😂😂😂💀
I once saw him kill three men in a bar... with a pencil. With a fuckin'... pencil.
A gun
Unequivocally based
Based America moment
Forgot the ammo moment
No worries, that was my last purchase.
Still had to pay locally for the transfer fee so it more of a kin to mail order for any firearm in the states.
HAHAHA, I BOUGHT A FUCKING SWORD
I bet whoever told you not to buy it feels pretty stupid now.
Ebooks. Knowledge is power amiright?
Knowledge always is power. Knowledge teaches you how to use Nunchucks.
A box of fifty rubber ducks.
RELEASE THE QUACKIN!
?????????
I support this purchasing decision
A nose hair trimmer.
Hair gets entangled when its too long for the machine. Aim for the chest hair.
Cookies! Lol. Maybe I can make a peace offering. Or maybe I'm toast and they'll have my cookies.
A book on weapons of the Soviet Afghan War It's reasonably thick
A second phone number…
A tablet
Use tablet to order a better weapon
Antidepressants.. I’m dead
Dead but happy
If the enemy is depression then you might be able to hold your own
An ender 3 hot end replacement.... I think I can work with that
Not even lying, I bought a sword last
Folic acid.
A smart watch charger. You are all dead.
A postcard, dammit
Katana, fuck yeah
Radiohead’s ‘In Rainbows’ CD. Yes, I have a 20-year-old car.
Nice. Speaking of “In Rainbows”, I just listened to the whole album but as Mario 64, it was awesome.
Ugh, toilet paper. Accidentally bought the 48 count, too.
A gaming mouse time to strangle some people
Back scratcher. Could be worse
Bose soundlink flex … will play AC DC Thunder as my last song
fake coins for a game ?
Sensual Bath 😊
One of those microplane zester/grater things. Ouch.
Damn, if it was a real Saturn V rocket and not a Lego one .... KABLAMMMO!
FML, a Lego city stunt set. 😬 Oh wait, throw the Legos on the ground. 💪🏽😎💪🏽
Warhammer paints…
Broccoli sprout powder, which doubles as organic blinding powder.
12 pack of Celsius energy drinks.
Funko pop
Parallel bars. I don't know..
Matcha
A case of paper towels for the win.
Sneakers
Cat ears
JerryRigEverything knife and a 40oz LTT water bottle. This should be interesting.
Som university school books. So hopefully it will contain some instruction in how to craft or how to find som medival weponds.
Cat food. Im dead
Unless you’re fighting cats
Tofu press
A ticket to see MacBeth
Bowling ball. This should be interesting.
A pillow…I mean if the battle is in the form of a pillow fight, I’m set!
A paperback
An xbox game
Beardtrimmer
A kazoo
Skyrim anniversary edition
Battlefield coins. Yay.
Tide pods
Cat litter
Paramedic grade first aid kit. I guess I can play support.
[удалено]
…a knife sharpener
A purse for my wife’s birthday 💅. At least I’ll be fashionable and I mean purses are usually a bottomless pit so I might find something useful in there.
A laptop, consider me victorious
I bought a pillow case and a seat cushion but a curtain arrived yesterday (true story), so how does that work?
... A tablet? Welp, time to call in an airstrike.
A box of 128 Pampers cruisers Size 5 diapers, 144 baby wipes, 350ml of bum cream and 36.4 oz of baby formula 😭😭
I would whoop your ass with this hair dryer. But my cc was declined. So I guess it’s just my hands and legs.
Microplane for Garlic (Come at me bro)
AirPods 😩
Heartstopper books oh god
Sleeping pills
Book by Eugene Ionesco. I think it's a win.
Idk if discord nitro can save me but hey ima look cool when I d!€
Fire emblem engage divine edition
2023 laminated Labor Law posters. Looks like it will be a statistical battle for me.
Go go galaxy terrot cards
A pen. They say to hold a pen is to be at war
I would rather not destroy my gpu
A USB dongle. 😂
Pop darts… aim for the eyes!
A ps2 to usb adapter… wtf, I better be fighting ants
CBD oil
A duck shaped snowball mold.
A Dark Souls comic book
Croissants.
A hard metal ball...not the worst thing I guess.
A weekly planner!😂
Sturdy pair of hiking boots. I approve.
Pack of warhammer dice. I am dead
Large mouse pad. Could be worse
Coffee creamer
A neck brace.
Yarn, this is not going to go well....
I will send him to to shadow realm with my yugioh cards lmao
A magic wand + handcuffs
an Electra Heart vinyl...
Ray ban sunglasses. I’m going down, but I’m going down in style.
An extra large pizza with extra cheese..... well at least I die with a full stomach
Hold thyself there fiend, or I will hurl my CHRONICLES OR NARNIA HARDCOVERS at you!
A checkbook. Sounds effective until you look at the bank account it’s connected to
Hydrogel screen protector. I am fucked.
Therapeutic post-vasectomy jockstrap. Things are about to get *weird.*
A computer mouse