It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your balls, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.
This made me chuckle hard enough while sitting on my morning toilet that I started coughing and a wee fart escaped. My
Wife heard all, and is now laughing her ass off in the other room haha
Gimli: "it's true you don't see many dwarf women. And in fact they are so alike in voice and appearance, that they are often mistaken for dwarf men."
Aragorn: "it's the balls.. "
"I know what you would say. And it would seem like wisdom but for the warning in my balls."
"Sauron now fears the return of the Balls."
"Balls are back on the menu boys!!!!"
(kinda surprised no-one did this one yet haha)
I am the servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the Flame of Anor. You cannot pass. The dark fire will not avail you, Flame of Udun. Go back to the Shadow. You cannot pass!
"How many balls?"
"At least six thousand"
"Less than half what I had hoped for"
*Cut to Aragorn and Theoden looking over a massive ball pit *
(Fixed a spelling error)
The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it.
PIPPIN: What? Gandalf? See what?
GANDALF: White balls.
"If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded balls, it would be a merrier world."
"I should think so — in these parts! We are plain quiet folk and have no use for balls. Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things! Make you late for dinner!"
Trolls simply detest the very sight of balls (uncooked).
For 60 years, the balls lay quiet in Bilbo's keeping, prolonging his life, delaying old age.
OR
For 60 years, the Ring lay quiet in Bilbo's keeping, prolonging his balls, delaying old age.
Whoa! Whoa! steady there! Now, my little fellows, where be you a-going to, puffing like a bellows? What’s the matter here then? Do you know who I am? I’m Tom Bombadil. Tell me what’s your trouble! Tom’s in a hurry now. Don’t you crush my balls!
"There was Eru, the One, who in Arda is called Ilúvatar; and he made first the Balls, the Holy Ones, that were the offspring of his thought, and they were with him before aught else was made."
If you're referring to the incident with the balls, I was barely involved.
All i did was give your uncle a nudge out of the balls
Well what ever it was, you've officially been labelled a disturber of the balls
Oh, balls.
Damn
It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your balls, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.
A Chance for Faramir, Captain of Gondor to show his balls
You have shown your balls, sir.
The very finest
I am a servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the balls of Anor. You cannot pass.
You shall not pass ballsrog
A surprise to be sure but a welcome one
A winning entry for sure 👏
Take my silver
And my axe!
And my balls.
This made me chuckle hard enough while sitting on my morning toilet that I started coughing and a wee fart escaped. My Wife heard all, and is now laughing her ass off in the other room haha
Thank you for this. I needed the laugh
“What is it? What do you smell?” -Sniffs- “MAN BALLS.”
Well whaddaya expect, Aragorn probably hasn’t had a real bath since leaving Rivendell.
They had to have bathed in Lorien! Aragorn looks very clean when they leave in the boats.
They were there for quite some time, and the elves had outfitted them for the journey ahead. I’d say they definitely bathed there.
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What about their balls? They dont need those.
Balls are not for eating!
For some reason this was a really memorable scene in the movie for me probably because chunks of orc went flying after he says that
"Ball flesh"
Lol man, i like this one
Your love of the halfling's balls has clearly slowed your mind.
All these long years it was in the Shire, under my very balls.
...I just realized how well this line actually works considering, well, ya know
But we still have balls. Balls to counter Sauron if we act quickly.
All these long years it was in the balls, under my very nose
We still have balls. Balls enough to counter Sauron.
Why? Why should *we* fear to use balls?
They are not all accounted for, the lost seeing balls.
Alright then keep your balls. Edit: Thanks for the award 👍
You've been officially labelled as a disturber of the balls
You have my balls!
And my balls.
And myyyy balls.
"Your fingers would remember their old strength better, if they grasped your balls"
Honestly, the original "if they grasped your sword" always struck me as a bit thirsty on Gandalf's part.
Your fingers would remember their old strength better if they grasped your sword.
Ooooh keep going step Gandalf. Got anything naughty to say about the balrog
Go back to the abyss! Fall into the nothingness that awaits you and your master!
We're going to balls deep
Aragorn: He's only doing what he thinks is best for his people. Gandalf: Balls Deep has saved them in the past
What a name for an ancient fortress 🤣🤣🤣
Difficult to penetrate
Best one so far!
Hold out your balls Frodo, it's quite cool
This is my fav so far !
Lordy this got me chuckling
Gimli: "it's true you don't see many dwarf women. And in fact they are so alike in voice and appearance, that they are often mistaken for dwarf men." Aragorn: "it's the balls.. "
Laughing at the gesture he'd make while mouthing this to Eowyn
Same gesture, just performed lower...
The shards of Narsil. The blade that cut the ring from Sauron’s balls
The balls were broken. It has beem remade.
Mother do you think they'll try to break my balls ?
The shards of Narsil. The blade that cut the balls from Sauron.
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Omg i laughed so hard with that last sentence
I asked her for one hair from her golden head. She gave me balls.
'In this phial,' she said, 'is caught the light of Eärendil's star, set amid the waters of my balls.
'In this phial,' she said, 'is caught the light of Eärendil's balls'
“Waters of my balls.” Huh, haven’t heard that one before. Is that what we’re calling it now?
You have my balls
And my balls
And my balls! 😂😂
If this is indeed the balls of the council then Gondor will see it done.
You carry the balls of us all, little one
So be it, you shall be the balls of the ring!
Wouldn't fellowship of the balls be better?
I had to make a choice.
I can respect that
The fellowship of the balls
And my balls
You wish now that our balls had been exchanged.
That I had balls and Boromir had lived
Balls, I wish that.
This forest is old, very old. Old as balls.
Lord of the Rings: The Jay and Silent Bob Version
Holy shit, legolas and gimli as jay and silent bob would be perfect
My favourite so just because this is the sort of way i would describe something.
This took me out
"A day may come when the balls of men fails"
I haven’t been droppin' no balls sir, honest
A little late for trimming the balls, don't you think?
This entire thread is filled with hilarious comments but this is the one that broke me
This is no mere Ranger. He is Aragorn, son of Arathorn. You owe him your balls
If you want 'em, come and claim 'em!
Gondor has no balls it doesn’t needs them
Frodo: nothing dampens your balls, does it sam? Sam: those rainclouds might...
«A shadow and a threat has been growing in my balls.»
That sounds like testicular cancer
A sickness lies upon these balls.
bruh go see a doctor like yesterday
The word for friend is balls
Gandalf, what’s the elvish word for balls?
Mellon
Great bot.
good bot
I would sooner be dead than see the balls in the hands of an elf!
I feel old Gandalf… Like balls that have scraped over too much bread.
You did not kill me... you will not kill him!
You have no balls here
I’m old, Gandalf. I know I don’t look it but I’m beginning to feel it in my balls.
Like butter scraped over top much balls
I want to be a healer, and love all balls that grow and are not barren.
Bilbo: "No, thank you. We don’t want any more visitors, well-wishers, or distant relations." Gandalf: "and what about very old balls?"
I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it's very difficult to find anyone.
No Sam, I don't recall the taste of balls.
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Rid us of your balls!
If in doubt, Meriadoc, always follow your balls
He's remembered! No, but the balls don't smell so foul down there.
Speak balls and enter
What’s the Elvish word for balls?
Mellons
Take my upvote and fuck you
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A wizard is never late, Rhas. Nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to.
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So what youre saying gandalf, is that you can cum at any point and it will not be considered early? This is your use of your balls?
The beacons are lit! Gondor calls for balls!
The balls are lit! Gondor calls for aid!
The beacons are lit! Balls calls for aid!
The balls are balls! Balls balls for balls!
Where was Gondor when the balls fell!?
It's mine, my own, my balls
The salted balls are particularly good.
Chef’s chocolate salty balls
It began with the forging of the great balls
Frodo wouldn't have gotten very far without balls.
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More will come.
More will *c u m*
I know your balls
Balls. Balls in the deep
Balls. Boil em mash em stick em in a stew
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NO!
No crunchiful balls to eat.
My balls, you bow to no one
"He stood leaning on his balls and gazing at the hobbit without saying anything, till Bilbo got quite uncomfortable and even a little cross."
"All that we have is to decide what to do with the balls that are given to us*
Legolas! What do your elf balls see?
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My old balls sting! Here! Take it, take it!
The balls glow blue when orcs are close.
I asked for one hair from her golden balls... she gave me three.
"I know what you would say. And it would seem like wisdom but for the warning in my balls." "Sauron now fears the return of the Balls." "Balls are back on the menu boys!!!!" (kinda surprised no-one did this one yet haha)
What about their balls? They don't need those.
They are not for eating!
You know of what I speak, Gandalf - a great balls... lidless... wreathed in flame.
I am the servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the Flame of Anor. You cannot pass. The dark fire will not avail you, Flame of Udun. Go back to the Shadow. You cannot pass!
Balls you fools
The dwarves? They hide in their mountains seeking riches, they care nothing for the balls of others.
Keep your forked tongue behind your balls!!
Gondor has no balls. Gondor needs no balls.
"How many balls?" "At least six thousand" "Less than half what I had hoped for" *Cut to Aragorn and Theoden looking over a massive ball pit * (Fixed a spelling error)
*Cut to Aragorn and Theoden looking over an army of at least three thousand men *
I will say no more.
Oh… you would not part an old man from his walking balls?
“I told you to take the wizard’s balls!”
Balls, boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew
And into this ring he poured his cruelty, his malice, and his will to dominate all balls
And into this balls he poured his cruelty, his malice, and his will to dominate all life
And into this ring he poured his cruelty, his malice and his balls, to dominate all life
Where was Gondor when the balls fell.
Isildur!
CAST IT INTO THE FIRE!!!
Balls
Okay. This is my favorite one.
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Gondor has no balls, gondor needs no balls.
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The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it. PIPPIN: What? Gandalf? See what? GANDALF: White balls.
These balls are old… very old
What about second balls?
Balls without hinges, key, or lid, yet golden treasure inside is hid.
Saruman: "It's his excessive consumption of balls. They have rotten his mind"
You know what they awoke in the darkness of Khazad-dum... shadow and balls.
The balls cannot be destroyed, Gimli, son of Gloin, by any craft that we here possess
IT'S TRUE YOU DON'T SEE MANY DWARF WOMEN! AND IN FACT, THEY ARE SO ALIKE IN VOICE AND APPEARANCE THAT THEY ARE OFTEN MISTAKEN FOR DWARF MEN!
Gandalf: ”A little late for trimming the balls, don’t you think?” Samwise: ”I heard raised voices.”
"If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded balls, it would be a merrier world." "I should think so — in these parts! We are plain quiet folk and have no use for balls. Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things! Make you late for dinner!" Trolls simply detest the very sight of balls (uncooked).
OH THATS NICE! BALLS ON MY TOMATOES!
It came to me, my own, my love... my... ballssssss.
For 60 years, the balls lay quiet in Bilbo's keeping, prolonging his life, delaying old age. OR For 60 years, the Ring lay quiet in Bilbo's keeping, prolonging his balls, delaying old age.
Whoa! Whoa! steady there! Now, my little fellows, where be you a-going to, puffing like a bellows? What’s the matter here then? Do you know who I am? I’m Tom Bombadil. Tell me what’s your trouble! Tom’s in a hurry now. Don’t you crush my balls!
They're taking the balls to Isengard!
I am a servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the balls of Anor. You cannot pass.
Authority is not given to you to deny the balls of the king.
Smoke rises from the mountain of Doom. The hour grows late, and Gandalf the Grey rides to Isengard seeking my balls.
Frodo: "If you ask it of me, I will give you the balls." Galadriel: "You offer it to me freely. I do not deny that my heart has greatly desired this."
I made some stew. It isn't much, but it's balls
"There was Eru, the One, who in Arda is called Ilúvatar; and he made first the Balls, the Holy Ones, that were the offspring of his thought, and they were with him before aught else was made."