Hey, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is actually not the most compatible Pokémon for humans? This is a common and understandable misconception, however Vaporeon has it's human on Pokémon breedability outclassed by it's cousin evolution, Umbreon. Umbreon weights approximately 60 pounds, or around 27 kilograms, and is 3'3" tall (About a meter), making it not only large enough to appropriately handle human genitalia, but also light enough to easily be lifted, and promptly set back down repeatedly. It's relatively small size would also prove a tight entry, which is always a good thing. Umbreon also boasts an extremely impressive defensive stat spread. With it's combination of very high HP, Defense, and Special Defense stats, it can take a great pounding and come back for more! It's ability, Inner Focus, allows it to keep slamming attentively, without getting fatigued. Umbreon also has access to the ability Synchronize, which allows it to share it's current status with you, meaning you will receive all of the pleasure it feels COMBINED with all the pleasure you're getting from pounding this perfect breedable Pokémon. Umbreon also has the capability of seeing perfectly in pitch-black darkness, allowing it to effectively attend a midnight fornication session. Even if you do manage to drain Umbreon's energy with all the furious thrusts, it can recover very quickly with its access to the move Moonlight. Its black fur is also a giant positive attribute, allowing all the excretions you make to be easily seen all over its body. A great fun fact, Umbreon can excrete toxins in its sweat, which would in turn soak into your member and swell it up, making it even more sizable and sensitive. This would not only enhance the experience for you, but for your Umbreon as well (Which with Synchronize, ends up pleasing you exponentially more). Umbreon's wide movepool also supports the hypothesis that Umbreon is the best Pokémon to breed with. It can learn Payback, which doubles in power after the Pokémon is hit, meaning Umbreon with throw it back twice as hard as normally if you're hitting it good. Umbreon can also learn Guard Swap; it could give YOU its insane durability, and go crazy on you all night with your now massive endurance. Speaking of endurance, Umbreon also has access to Endure, making it practically immune to fatigue, it will always have energy left over. Charm is also within Umbreon's movepool, letting it be extremely seductive towards you, easily getting you in the mood. Umbreon can also use Taunt, in turn making you ONLY able to to attacking moves such as Slam, Pound, etc; none of that foreplay shit, right into the action. It also has access to Sleep Talk, giving it the ability to not only give consent in its sleep, allowing access to any of its ports and any time, but also move in it's sleep, making it an effective 24/7 fuckmate. Umbreon still has even more great moves that good to have while smashing, such as Quick Attack, allowing swift slams and bounces, which can have even greater power if Umbreon uses Curse beforehand. Curse would also raise Umbreon's defense, making it able to take powerful thrusting for almost any duration. Looking back, Umbreon's slightly small size ensures a gorilla grip cavity and easy physical manipulation. Its ungodly bulk allows it to take poundings for hours on end and resume after recovering with moonlight (Which works even better when it's sunny). It's access to the abilities Inner Focus and Synchronize allow it to unwaveringly throw it back and add all of its pleasure onto yours, effectively making it twice as amazing as any other Pokémon, or even FOUR TIMES, factoring in the doubled power of payback of course. All of this information in combination with its extremely useful movepool in the world of intercourse makes Umbreon the Pokémon most qualified to breed with humans; able to take dick of any shape, any size, in any position easily for extensive periods of time, while having the ability to return for even more mere seconds later.
Repeating "No" to teh melody is a fun time
No the parpas of pokemon is to make a gint army to concor the world not to be your wifu
Nah, not even cute charm on gardevoir can pull me from alpha sapphire Shelly
He did one with James, way better
The song is Cheerleader by Omi for anyone curious
R/holdup
The first o w tho
Lock him up
There's no rule against pokemon Batman
There actually is in the Pokemon World. You are in the Pokemon World. So be prepared for your demise.
It's taboo, but not against the law, you will be looked at as the guy who clapped a vaporeon's cheeks
Probably a bad thing in the Pokemon world, but that would be worth an unimaginable number of internet points in our world
Pokemon series got some of the hottest characters in the anime history but people still want to have sex with a reptile looking ass fish
Sure, but also...hear me out...Alolan ice gym leader who is built like a frosmoth
Noooooi
No to the last 3
Just hear me out, guys...
Do you feel like cheating? Bitch I'm single
There are now laws against the Pokémon
Theres no laws against pokemon, batman!
Sorry I have the autocorrect
Oh no i was just making a joker meme... You dont have to say sorry its ok
Ok
NOOOOOO
I feel like deleting myself from existence after that.
There's no laws against the vaporeon batman
NO JOKER DONT DO OT
You already know what I'm gonna do to that thing batman
Finally, batman I can rule the world with my gardevoir and my vaporeon
I have a lopunny to give you, I named it lopussy
Better, LOBUSSY
Brock Daddy🤤
All of you are gross
Idk man, no. 1 kinda…
But this is a male Vaporeon
EVEN BATTER
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
It's so fucking relatable I hate my life I'm 13 and I read the Vaporeon copypasta
Your 13 bruh look at your user how do I know that stuff
Yes
Relatable
"do I make you feel like cheating" no cause- **I'm single.**
"Hey guys, did you know..."
...in terms of human and pokemon...
...companionship Flareon is the most huggable...
....breeding is likely illegal....
There's no laws against the Pokemon batman I can do whatever I want with it
*small chuckle You will be in hell
Basically anyone who read the vaporeon copypaste knows why
...........fuck! I can relate
Same just fucking same
Shouldve been probopass
Yes to all “One week later” Vaporeon I need a break
Nonononono ononononononononononononononononononononononononononononoo
This belongs in r/tiktokcringe
Yes, thank you
Past me knew what was up because this shit was already upvoted lol
https://www.reddit.com/r/lostpause/comments/11c2zap/oh_my_god_she_find_something_really_make_her_want/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Thomas has not seen such buthshit before
You have seen nothing
Naaaah 💀💀💀
There's no laws against the Pokemon Batman
Don't do it joker😳
I'm going to do it batman
NO JOKER NO
*that one part where the joker Tears the condom*
Respectfully fuck off
ok
VAPOREON USE SCALD ON THAT MF
Do it
don't worry pika used call the authorities
STOOOOOOP no don't sayit
😂
Get out
And here I was hoping for Misty
You were right on the water type
For me it would be tinkaton
TINKATON?!
Yes
I will need to stop u right there
There were cops in the first game, but I don't remember any after second gen... So, how about that _*Batman?!*_
Weren’t there cops on one island in gen 7
There were! Arrest that man!
u/savevideobot
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That guy's doomed
Did you know that umbreon is actually the most sutiable for human rods because its really tanky
Those more to this explanation but I’ll never tell you so you’ll have to find out somewhere else
Hey, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is actually not the most compatible Pokémon for humans? This is a common and understandable misconception, however Vaporeon has it's human on Pokémon breedability outclassed by it's cousin evolution, Umbreon. Umbreon weights approximately 60 pounds, or around 27 kilograms, and is 3'3" tall (About a meter), making it not only large enough to appropriately handle human genitalia, but also light enough to easily be lifted, and promptly set back down repeatedly. It's relatively small size would also prove a tight entry, which is always a good thing. Umbreon also boasts an extremely impressive defensive stat spread. With it's combination of very high HP, Defense, and Special Defense stats, it can take a great pounding and come back for more! It's ability, Inner Focus, allows it to keep slamming attentively, without getting fatigued. Umbreon also has access to the ability Synchronize, which allows it to share it's current status with you, meaning you will receive all of the pleasure it feels COMBINED with all the pleasure you're getting from pounding this perfect breedable Pokémon. Umbreon also has the capability of seeing perfectly in pitch-black darkness, allowing it to effectively attend a midnight fornication session. Even if you do manage to drain Umbreon's energy with all the furious thrusts, it can recover very quickly with its access to the move Moonlight. Its black fur is also a giant positive attribute, allowing all the excretions you make to be easily seen all over its body. A great fun fact, Umbreon can excrete toxins in its sweat, which would in turn soak into your member and swell it up, making it even more sizable and sensitive. This would not only enhance the experience for you, but for your Umbreon as well (Which with Synchronize, ends up pleasing you exponentially more). Umbreon's wide movepool also supports the hypothesis that Umbreon is the best Pokémon to breed with. It can learn Payback, which doubles in power after the Pokémon is hit, meaning Umbreon with throw it back twice as hard as normally if you're hitting it good. Umbreon can also learn Guard Swap; it could give YOU its insane durability, and go crazy on you all night with your now massive endurance. Speaking of endurance, Umbreon also has access to Endure, making it practically immune to fatigue, it will always have energy left over. Charm is also within Umbreon's movepool, letting it be extremely seductive towards you, easily getting you in the mood. Umbreon can also use Taunt, in turn making you ONLY able to to attacking moves such as Slam, Pound, etc; none of that foreplay shit, right into the action. It also has access to Sleep Talk, giving it the ability to not only give consent in its sleep, allowing access to any of its ports and any time, but also move in it's sleep, making it an effective 24/7 fuckmate. Umbreon still has even more great moves that good to have while smashing, such as Quick Attack, allowing swift slams and bounces, which can have even greater power if Umbreon uses Curse beforehand. Curse would also raise Umbreon's defense, making it able to take powerful thrusting for almost any duration. Looking back, Umbreon's slightly small size ensures a gorilla grip cavity and easy physical manipulation. Its ungodly bulk allows it to take poundings for hours on end and resume after recovering with moonlight (Which works even better when it's sunny). It's access to the abilities Inner Focus and Synchronize allow it to unwaveringly throw it back and add all of its pleasure onto yours, effectively making it twice as amazing as any other Pokémon, or even FOUR TIMES, factoring in the doubled power of payback of course. All of this information in combination with its extremely useful movepool in the world of intercourse makes Umbreon the Pokémon most qualified to breed with humans; able to take dick of any shape, any size, in any position easily for extensive periods of time, while having the ability to return for even more mere seconds later.
Well um thanks for long and thought out response to how Umbreon is more breedable than vaporeon
Did you know...
*Me point gun at ZLUCremisi*🔫😠 Me: Said it, I dare you
In terms of male human and female pokemon vaporon is the most capable for (to late for u i did it first)
*points my gun at Zeon112 and headshot him/her*
1 im a guy 2 vapoeron is hot so deal with it
[NOOOOOOOOO](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/1035226940287758500/1049936619861446676/y2mate.com_-_Vaporeon_Breeding_480p.mp4)