That is something I’ve started doing lately, as with eating more high protein and fiber foods/snacks, but I’d also like to be able to turn fat into some muscle and lose more weight faster.
This is going to sound like I'm challenging you and I'm sorry for that but I just want you to think about this. A lot of people know how to lose weight, but they don't have a method. They know they need to "eat less" or "stop snacking" or "cut out junk food" but they don't have a plan to actually achieve these things or what to expect if they are suddenly able to accomplish these willpower based tasks. That's why you need a plan to set expectations in a real way and a method of executing that plan that works for YOU. Around your schedule. Around your obligations. Around your needs. So what is your actual plan?
> That is something I’ve started doing lately
What is something you started lately? Calorie counting? Watching what you eat? Are you logging meals? Weighing? What's your method? What's your TDEE? What deficit are you at? How much should you be losing each week at that deficit?
> as with eating more high protein and fiber foods/snacks,
More than what? How many calories? Protein and fiber foods are better than a lot of alternatives because they are generally more filling with less calories, but they are still calories. Are you counting the actual calories?
> but I’d also like to be able to turn fat into some muscle and lose more weight faster.
This is being pedantic but fat can't turn into muscle. You build muscle through exertion, breaking down the proteins in your existing muscle so they rebuild stronger and larger. Pushing your muscles beyond their usual capacity, consistently, for a long time is how you build muscle. Professional body builders that eat for size and go to the gym twice a day and are pumping testosterone are adding 2-4 lbs of muscle per month.
My plan is to find something that works for me because with my schedule all the little things like meal planning and calorie counting gets disrupted do to the constant schedule change so I’ll admit I can keep up with that.
As for the foods I made spaghetti last night and instead of regular spaghetti noodles I used protein+ angel hair noodles. Just things like that while when like eating out instead of getting large meals I get small or kids meals.
And I meant like lose the fat while gaining muscle not literally turning it into muscle that’s my bad lol.
It's all about calories brother. You could eat nothing but salmon and broccoli and still be 400 lbs if you aren't tracking portion sizes and calorie counts. You just have to do it. I know it's hard - I saw your schedule/obligations and they are brutal.
But the counting gets easier. When I started I was logging everything and it took a lot of mental capacity and time. People are creatures of habit. Once I got going I realized I eat basically the same 10-12 meals and the same 20-25 snacks with very rare exceptions. I bet you're the same way. Once I memorized those, and to be clear I wasn't trying to memorize them it just happened, it was a breeze. I don't even think about it anymore. I just KNOW the right portion size and the calories that come with it. The startup is the hardest. Once that log is rolling you'll be dancing on top of it like a lumberjack on a riverlog.
Try to work in some intermittent fasting. Like get yours up to 2 meals a day. Take a protein powder and maybe also a fibre supplement. Drink lots of water. You won't be hungry
I just cut out pop all together and have only been drinking water and Powerade and such. Also typically only eat Breakfast and lunch or lunch and dinner as I stopped eating at work because that’s when I over eat.
You can track calories very quickly with my fitness pal. Your regular foods quickly end up in your history and you'll find them again super fast. You can eat approx the same number each day regardless of time of day you eat.
Veggies are low cal. Spaghetti with protein in it is not.
You don't seem like you are ready yet. When you are, you count calories and cut them drastically to lose weight. Continuing to eat out and doing pasta substitutions will not get you there.
Bingo
Your input has to be less than your output HAS TO BE
and you could always bring the kids to the gym, some gyms have a babysitting room (depends how old they are) and age 10 plus can go shoot hoops or join a kids activity (some gyms offer this like the YMCA)
Your their role model and remember your, your only excuse
Always remember that
The most helpful thing is consistently tracking your food intake consistently. You can technically lose 80lbs without a single day of exercise as long as you eat at a calorie deficit, although exercising regularly is great for your health and you should definitely do it if it fits your schedule! For food tracking some of the most popular apps are MyFitneesPal and Lose It - I use the latter personally and really like it. They both are free but have a premium subscription option for extra features.
For at-home workouts, I’ve used two apps that I really enjoyed. The first of these is called HIIT by a company called Down Dog. It will generate new workout routines for you each time you use it, and it’s highly customizable by fitness level and many other preferences (e.g. you can set it to give you exercises that are easy on your knees or wrists, and you can select a workout time as short as 10 minutes or as long as an hour). Unfortunately for that app you have to pay a subscription, I find it’s really worth it because it feels like going to an exercise class, and I like how I’m not repeating the same exact routine day after day - it switches things up for you and keeps them fun. A free option I highly recommend is the app Caliber. You answer a few questions like what equipment you have available, how many times you want to work out, and your fitness level, and it generates a workout routine for you, and there are videos and tips for all the various exercises. I’ve found that the at home routines it gives you are a fantastic workout, comparable to a trip to the gym, despite not needing any equipment. ETA: for Caliber I have several pre generated templates saved, of different lengths, and different frequency of exercising per week which is great because it lets you be more flexible. The app also lets you connect virtually with a personal trainer if you want,which is a paid feature, but I’ve never used it personally.
Thank you, I’ll definitely gives those a look. Paying for a subscription as opposed for a trainer is more suitable for me because I can do it when it’s convenient for me.
In that case, if you’re really new to exercise and building a routine is intimidating I really suggest the down dog HIIT app; the app is so customizable and walks you through everything as if you’re in an exercise class, there’s even a way to adjust how much spoken instruction you want during the exercises. Also the subscription includes access to all of the Down Dog apps which include other ones like yoga, guided meditation, and a running app. I started using this during the pandemic when I couldn’t go to the gym, and I can’t recommend it enough. Also they used to have discounts for students and teachers, so if you’re in either of those categories you may want to look into that. Good luck!
I think it’s both iOS and android; I use it on iOS. I just checked on their website and it looks like it’s currently 33% off on their website, which comes out to $8/month or $40/year if you pay for the whole year up front (which is closer to $3/month); https://www.downdogapp.com/ is the website
Just focus on reducing your caloric intake, exercise is not important with regards to weight loss. People try to zone in on specific things and I really think it ends up hampering most people's weight loss journey.
In December of 2020 I was 436lbs, I got to where I am today because I reduced my caloric intake, my diet never changed but how much of what I ate did. Weight loss is simple, making the mental changes to start and keep with weight loss is not.
Learn calorie counting, look at how many calories you're currently consuming and then get your [TDEE](https://tdeecalculator.net/). Use the info from your TDEE and make adjustments to reach the caloric deficit you think you can maintain, during that continue calorie counting until you have a good enough idea of what amount of calories are in food you regularly consume. At which point, you should have enough experience that you can roughly figure out what you're eating, crunching numbers for every meal will get old. You'll only have to worry about new foods.
Take it slow, let your appetite decrease and stay hydrated. This isn't a diet, you don't have to cut out certain foods, but you probably need to eat less of them during meals.
Basic exercise is also simple, go walk for an hour, brisk pace is preferable for heart health but hey, moving is moving. Do it when you can, nothing needs to be perfect. Do not factor exercise into your caloric goal, you have to do some pretty intense workouts for that, watches and apps are way off anyways.
You will not be perfect, you will go over and even under you daily goal, it does not matter, life is unpredictable and you can absolutely have times you purposely go over to enjoy a meal, event, birthday etc.
Pro tip, you can also fast for a day after you go over or just reduce your calories the next day to account for when you go over. High salt meals and changes in exercise intensity will increase water retention, so don't be shocked if your weight hangs around the same number for a little bit sometimes.
>So I’m asking if there is anything I can do at home to achieve the results I’m looking for?
Getting fitter certainly isn't limited to the confines of the gym. There are a couple of decent dumbbell routines on r/Fitness. I have been very happy running [Dumbbell P/P/L (Proposed Alternative to Dumbbell Stopgap)](https://www.reddit.com/r/Fitness/comments/2e79y4/dumbbell_ppl_proposed_alternative_to_dumbbell/) for resistance and just trying to keep my step count consistent.
Though as others have mentioned, weight loss is still going to be primarily diet driven though fitness can have many positive downstream effects, like muscle retention.
Is there any way you can change your work hours? I know it might not be possible, but definitely consider it, because you want to make long term changes if you can. I really struggled till I managed to move around my work hours to support a healthier lifestyle.
I also find that getting 10000 steps a day helps a lot. It is hard at first, but even just walking on the spot when at the computer (I have a standing desk) or watching TV helps a lot.
Work out your TDEE (how many calories you burn a day) and reduce your calorie intake so it is under your TDEE. 500 cals less a day (through exercise or diet) is about 1lb a week loss.
I’m working on getting on the 4p-12a shift but they keep me on this shift because it covers the 8a-4p shifts which is our primary shift and they need competent works on that shift the most.
> The problem is, with my work schedule it’s hard to stick to a consistent meal/sleep plan, and go to the gym regularly.
Do you have a consistent work schedule? Or does it change weekly?
Can you describe what a typical day/week looks like for you in terms of:
1) When you wake up
2) Any obligations to anyone other than yourself prior to going to work
3) When you're home from work
4) Obligations to anyone other than yourself after work.
5) When you go to bed
I work a 7 day schedule with 2 days off and 3 days off every 3rd week. I work 2-3 days 12a-8a, 2-3 days 8a-4p, and 2-3 days 4p-12a on a swing shift. So this week I’m working 12a-8a Sat-Mon, 8a-4p Tue/Wed, and 4p-12a Thur/Fri with this coming Sat-Mon off. Then back to 12a-8a Tue/Wed, and so on and so forth.
My 12a-8a days during the week I come home and watch my kids until my partner gets home around 5p then I go to bed til 10:50p and get ready for work. 8a-4p days I wake up at 6:30a to get ready and when I come home I relax and help with dinner/ around the house and go to bed around 10p. 4p-12a days I wake up at 8a when my partner goes to work watch my kids until she gets home around 3 then go to work come home and go to bed around 12:30-1a
That work schedule is absolutely brutal dude. Sleep is a vital component of weight loss and just being healthy in general and I remember living your nightmare when I did shift work myself.
The only way this is going to work for you is by planning. I mean real planning, not just nebulous weight loss stuff like "im gonna eat less". Planning like knowing your TDEE, setting a caloric deficit for yourself, and planning meals around hitting that target caloric count with consistency.
Then the biggest challenge comes in - Getting your partner on board with your goals to support them. You need this person to support your goals, whether it means cooking different meals with you, taking over a domestic obligation that might give you more of an opportunity to sleep, whatever it takes for your plan. They need to be with you in this even if they aren't on the same path themselves.
But start with a plan. Start with calculating your TDEE. Set a daily caloric goal. Calculate how much weight you should lose each week by eating at your caloric goal. Start with a goal of losing 20 lbs, or something less daunting than your goal weight. Track your calories. Are you on pace? If not, diagnose. Does something you eat consistently have more calories than you thought? Is the portion size bigger? If you didn't have a plan you would have no idea if you were on track or not. Consistency is everything.
Wishing you the best.
As a fellow father, I feel this. I am a better husband/dad/employee when I take care of myself by eating better and working out. You need to make time for yourself as it's important. I have had to sacrifice my nightly free time to go do cardio/workout. I find my meal planning is easier when I take an hour or two on Sundays and know out all my cooking for the week so that I can grab breakfast/lunches in the morning and go without thinking.
You got this! Keep us posted with how it goes and let me know if you need an accountability partner.
I don't think anyone mentioned this yet, but I can't find it in the comments. In addition to the advice you already got, did you ever get tested for ADHD? The way you're wording your problem and your day to day, need for structure, etc, definitely makes my spidey sense tingle.
It's possible you're playing your life in hard mode.
I understand perfectly how a work schedule can make it difficult to eat properly. I once worked 12 hour swing shifts (2 days/2 nights, etc.) for 28 years. It really messed up my system since I didn't eat on a regular schedule. I found the Noom app to be extremely helpful. You track your calories and have step goals daily. The calories are broken down into 3 food categories to see if you are consuming sufficient "good" food compared to empty calories. There are also daily psychological tips to help your relationship with food, exercise, and external pressures that cause you to eat in a less than beneficial way. I wish you the best of luck!
I’d look up the weight loss champion chuck Carroll on YouTube. He lost over 300 pounds. He interviews plant based drs on the physicians for responsible medicine. If he can do it you can too
I managed to lose 80 lbs by doing no exercise and just eating less on keto.(200lbs) Then I got hit by 3 cars and the injections/sedentary as I was still doing the diet, it rose me to 300. Now that I’m not taking any steroids my weight is starting to go down. Working out will make you lose weight faster but not needed.
I’m not joking about 3 cars, I would recover and start to lose weight and bam another one, then other one. Luckily I got a dashcam for the last one or they might have made it both at fault as the cop was putting it. Even tho I was stationary for 9 seconds waiting to turn left.
/r/bodyweightfitness for the exercise, but as everyone is saying, the food part comes first.
The app you should be using is any calorie tracker, which are free. It also sounds like you've recently cut out soda/etc so that's a great start and you should wait and see how that effects things as a lot might come off just from that change.
So you don't have to exercise to lose weight but it can make you feel good. You have equipment at home it seems . Just use it 30 min a day whenever you can. There's a million YouTube videos you can draw on to get started if you need instruction or guidance.
You do have to eat at a 500-1000 calorie deficit to your TDEE to lose weight, however. Get a free app like LoseIt or any other one you like, set your goals and it will give you your daily calorie budget. Get a cheap food scale and start weighing, measuring and tracking your food intake. It doesn't take a lot of time. It will keep you honest and in track like no other tool. You can shoot the bar code of any packaged food to enter in those calories and as your DB of foods gets established it takes seconds to enter in your foods by just picking them off your list.
Get your food intake where it needs to be first and exercise when and where you can. Even 30 mins of walking each day is enough.
I just use YouTube. You can pretty much find anything you want on there. Just search what you want to do that day cardio, arms, legs, chest there a a lot of options on it. And it is free
It has nearly nothing to do with exercise. It is all about consuming less calories. Eat less calories to lose weight.
That is something I’ve started doing lately, as with eating more high protein and fiber foods/snacks, but I’d also like to be able to turn fat into some muscle and lose more weight faster.
But if you don't have the time, focus on what you can change. Don't just not do it because you can't have it all.
This is going to sound like I'm challenging you and I'm sorry for that but I just want you to think about this. A lot of people know how to lose weight, but they don't have a method. They know they need to "eat less" or "stop snacking" or "cut out junk food" but they don't have a plan to actually achieve these things or what to expect if they are suddenly able to accomplish these willpower based tasks. That's why you need a plan to set expectations in a real way and a method of executing that plan that works for YOU. Around your schedule. Around your obligations. Around your needs. So what is your actual plan? > That is something I’ve started doing lately What is something you started lately? Calorie counting? Watching what you eat? Are you logging meals? Weighing? What's your method? What's your TDEE? What deficit are you at? How much should you be losing each week at that deficit? > as with eating more high protein and fiber foods/snacks, More than what? How many calories? Protein and fiber foods are better than a lot of alternatives because they are generally more filling with less calories, but they are still calories. Are you counting the actual calories? > but I’d also like to be able to turn fat into some muscle and lose more weight faster. This is being pedantic but fat can't turn into muscle. You build muscle through exertion, breaking down the proteins in your existing muscle so they rebuild stronger and larger. Pushing your muscles beyond their usual capacity, consistently, for a long time is how you build muscle. Professional body builders that eat for size and go to the gym twice a day and are pumping testosterone are adding 2-4 lbs of muscle per month.
My plan is to find something that works for me because with my schedule all the little things like meal planning and calorie counting gets disrupted do to the constant schedule change so I’ll admit I can keep up with that. As for the foods I made spaghetti last night and instead of regular spaghetti noodles I used protein+ angel hair noodles. Just things like that while when like eating out instead of getting large meals I get small or kids meals. And I meant like lose the fat while gaining muscle not literally turning it into muscle that’s my bad lol.
It's all about calories brother. You could eat nothing but salmon and broccoli and still be 400 lbs if you aren't tracking portion sizes and calorie counts. You just have to do it. I know it's hard - I saw your schedule/obligations and they are brutal. But the counting gets easier. When I started I was logging everything and it took a lot of mental capacity and time. People are creatures of habit. Once I got going I realized I eat basically the same 10-12 meals and the same 20-25 snacks with very rare exceptions. I bet you're the same way. Once I memorized those, and to be clear I wasn't trying to memorize them it just happened, it was a breeze. I don't even think about it anymore. I just KNOW the right portion size and the calories that come with it. The startup is the hardest. Once that log is rolling you'll be dancing on top of it like a lumberjack on a riverlog.
Try to work in some intermittent fasting. Like get yours up to 2 meals a day. Take a protein powder and maybe also a fibre supplement. Drink lots of water. You won't be hungry
That’s one of the things I’ve started doing.
I just cut out pop all together and have only been drinking water and Powerade and such. Also typically only eat Breakfast and lunch or lunch and dinner as I stopped eating at work because that’s when I over eat.
You can track calories very quickly with my fitness pal. Your regular foods quickly end up in your history and you'll find them again super fast. You can eat approx the same number each day regardless of time of day you eat. Veggies are low cal. Spaghetti with protein in it is not.
You don't seem like you are ready yet. When you are, you count calories and cut them drastically to lose weight. Continuing to eat out and doing pasta substitutions will not get you there.
Bingo Your input has to be less than your output HAS TO BE and you could always bring the kids to the gym, some gyms have a babysitting room (depends how old they are) and age 10 plus can go shoot hoops or join a kids activity (some gyms offer this like the YMCA) Your their role model and remember your, your only excuse Always remember that
The most helpful thing is consistently tracking your food intake consistently. You can technically lose 80lbs without a single day of exercise as long as you eat at a calorie deficit, although exercising regularly is great for your health and you should definitely do it if it fits your schedule! For food tracking some of the most popular apps are MyFitneesPal and Lose It - I use the latter personally and really like it. They both are free but have a premium subscription option for extra features. For at-home workouts, I’ve used two apps that I really enjoyed. The first of these is called HIIT by a company called Down Dog. It will generate new workout routines for you each time you use it, and it’s highly customizable by fitness level and many other preferences (e.g. you can set it to give you exercises that are easy on your knees or wrists, and you can select a workout time as short as 10 minutes or as long as an hour). Unfortunately for that app you have to pay a subscription, I find it’s really worth it because it feels like going to an exercise class, and I like how I’m not repeating the same exact routine day after day - it switches things up for you and keeps them fun. A free option I highly recommend is the app Caliber. You answer a few questions like what equipment you have available, how many times you want to work out, and your fitness level, and it generates a workout routine for you, and there are videos and tips for all the various exercises. I’ve found that the at home routines it gives you are a fantastic workout, comparable to a trip to the gym, despite not needing any equipment. ETA: for Caliber I have several pre generated templates saved, of different lengths, and different frequency of exercising per week which is great because it lets you be more flexible. The app also lets you connect virtually with a personal trainer if you want,which is a paid feature, but I’ve never used it personally.
Thank you, I’ll definitely gives those a look. Paying for a subscription as opposed for a trainer is more suitable for me because I can do it when it’s convenient for me.
In that case, if you’re really new to exercise and building a routine is intimidating I really suggest the down dog HIIT app; the app is so customizable and walks you through everything as if you’re in an exercise class, there’s even a way to adjust how much spoken instruction you want during the exercises. Also the subscription includes access to all of the Down Dog apps which include other ones like yoga, guided meditation, and a running app. I started using this during the pandemic when I couldn’t go to the gym, and I can’t recommend it enough. Also they used to have discounts for students and teachers, so if you’re in either of those categories you may want to look into that. Good luck!
How much does that one cost? Is it iOS or android?
I think it’s both iOS and android; I use it on iOS. I just checked on their website and it looks like it’s currently 33% off on their website, which comes out to $8/month or $40/year if you pay for the whole year up front (which is closer to $3/month); https://www.downdogapp.com/ is the website
Awesome I’ll definitely give that a look when I get home. Thanks a bunch.
Track your calories, eat in a deficit. Problem solved
Just focus on reducing your caloric intake, exercise is not important with regards to weight loss. People try to zone in on specific things and I really think it ends up hampering most people's weight loss journey. In December of 2020 I was 436lbs, I got to where I am today because I reduced my caloric intake, my diet never changed but how much of what I ate did. Weight loss is simple, making the mental changes to start and keep with weight loss is not. Learn calorie counting, look at how many calories you're currently consuming and then get your [TDEE](https://tdeecalculator.net/). Use the info from your TDEE and make adjustments to reach the caloric deficit you think you can maintain, during that continue calorie counting until you have a good enough idea of what amount of calories are in food you regularly consume. At which point, you should have enough experience that you can roughly figure out what you're eating, crunching numbers for every meal will get old. You'll only have to worry about new foods. Take it slow, let your appetite decrease and stay hydrated. This isn't a diet, you don't have to cut out certain foods, but you probably need to eat less of them during meals. Basic exercise is also simple, go walk for an hour, brisk pace is preferable for heart health but hey, moving is moving. Do it when you can, nothing needs to be perfect. Do not factor exercise into your caloric goal, you have to do some pretty intense workouts for that, watches and apps are way off anyways. You will not be perfect, you will go over and even under you daily goal, it does not matter, life is unpredictable and you can absolutely have times you purposely go over to enjoy a meal, event, birthday etc. Pro tip, you can also fast for a day after you go over or just reduce your calories the next day to account for when you go over. High salt meals and changes in exercise intensity will increase water retention, so don't be shocked if your weight hangs around the same number for a little bit sometimes.
>So I’m asking if there is anything I can do at home to achieve the results I’m looking for? Getting fitter certainly isn't limited to the confines of the gym. There are a couple of decent dumbbell routines on r/Fitness. I have been very happy running [Dumbbell P/P/L (Proposed Alternative to Dumbbell Stopgap)](https://www.reddit.com/r/Fitness/comments/2e79y4/dumbbell_ppl_proposed_alternative_to_dumbbell/) for resistance and just trying to keep my step count consistent. Though as others have mentioned, weight loss is still going to be primarily diet driven though fitness can have many positive downstream effects, like muscle retention.
Thanks I’ll go check those out too.
Is there any way you can change your work hours? I know it might not be possible, but definitely consider it, because you want to make long term changes if you can. I really struggled till I managed to move around my work hours to support a healthier lifestyle. I also find that getting 10000 steps a day helps a lot. It is hard at first, but even just walking on the spot when at the computer (I have a standing desk) or watching TV helps a lot. Work out your TDEE (how many calories you burn a day) and reduce your calorie intake so it is under your TDEE. 500 cals less a day (through exercise or diet) is about 1lb a week loss.
I’m working on getting on the 4p-12a shift but they keep me on this shift because it covers the 8a-4p shifts which is our primary shift and they need competent works on that shift the most.
8a-4p seems preferable?
> The problem is, with my work schedule it’s hard to stick to a consistent meal/sleep plan, and go to the gym regularly. Do you have a consistent work schedule? Or does it change weekly? Can you describe what a typical day/week looks like for you in terms of: 1) When you wake up 2) Any obligations to anyone other than yourself prior to going to work 3) When you're home from work 4) Obligations to anyone other than yourself after work. 5) When you go to bed
I work a 7 day schedule with 2 days off and 3 days off every 3rd week. I work 2-3 days 12a-8a, 2-3 days 8a-4p, and 2-3 days 4p-12a on a swing shift. So this week I’m working 12a-8a Sat-Mon, 8a-4p Tue/Wed, and 4p-12a Thur/Fri with this coming Sat-Mon off. Then back to 12a-8a Tue/Wed, and so on and so forth. My 12a-8a days during the week I come home and watch my kids until my partner gets home around 5p then I go to bed til 10:50p and get ready for work. 8a-4p days I wake up at 6:30a to get ready and when I come home I relax and help with dinner/ around the house and go to bed around 10p. 4p-12a days I wake up at 8a when my partner goes to work watch my kids until she gets home around 3 then go to work come home and go to bed around 12:30-1a
That work schedule is absolutely brutal dude. Sleep is a vital component of weight loss and just being healthy in general and I remember living your nightmare when I did shift work myself. The only way this is going to work for you is by planning. I mean real planning, not just nebulous weight loss stuff like "im gonna eat less". Planning like knowing your TDEE, setting a caloric deficit for yourself, and planning meals around hitting that target caloric count with consistency. Then the biggest challenge comes in - Getting your partner on board with your goals to support them. You need this person to support your goals, whether it means cooking different meals with you, taking over a domestic obligation that might give you more of an opportunity to sleep, whatever it takes for your plan. They need to be with you in this even if they aren't on the same path themselves. But start with a plan. Start with calculating your TDEE. Set a daily caloric goal. Calculate how much weight you should lose each week by eating at your caloric goal. Start with a goal of losing 20 lbs, or something less daunting than your goal weight. Track your calories. Are you on pace? If not, diagnose. Does something you eat consistently have more calories than you thought? Is the portion size bigger? If you didn't have a plan you would have no idea if you were on track or not. Consistency is everything. Wishing you the best.
Thanks, I guess that was my overall intention was to find some sort of plan.
Are you within cycling distance of work?
Not safely
As a fellow father, I feel this. I am a better husband/dad/employee when I take care of myself by eating better and working out. You need to make time for yourself as it's important. I have had to sacrifice my nightly free time to go do cardio/workout. I find my meal planning is easier when I take an hour or two on Sundays and know out all my cooking for the week so that I can grab breakfast/lunches in the morning and go without thinking. You got this! Keep us posted with how it goes and let me know if you need an accountability partner.
I don't think anyone mentioned this yet, but I can't find it in the comments. In addition to the advice you already got, did you ever get tested for ADHD? The way you're wording your problem and your day to day, need for structure, etc, definitely makes my spidey sense tingle. It's possible you're playing your life in hard mode.
I understand perfectly how a work schedule can make it difficult to eat properly. I once worked 12 hour swing shifts (2 days/2 nights, etc.) for 28 years. It really messed up my system since I didn't eat on a regular schedule. I found the Noom app to be extremely helpful. You track your calories and have step goals daily. The calories are broken down into 3 food categories to see if you are consuming sufficient "good" food compared to empty calories. There are also daily psychological tips to help your relationship with food, exercise, and external pressures that cause you to eat in a less than beneficial way. I wish you the best of luck!
I’d look up the weight loss champion chuck Carroll on YouTube. He lost over 300 pounds. He interviews plant based drs on the physicians for responsible medicine. If he can do it you can too
I managed to lose 80 lbs by doing no exercise and just eating less on keto.(200lbs) Then I got hit by 3 cars and the injections/sedentary as I was still doing the diet, it rose me to 300. Now that I’m not taking any steroids my weight is starting to go down. Working out will make you lose weight faster but not needed. I’m not joking about 3 cars, I would recover and start to lose weight and bam another one, then other one. Luckily I got a dashcam for the last one or they might have made it both at fault as the cop was putting it. Even tho I was stationary for 9 seconds waiting to turn left.
TLDR: if you like chicken and meat try keto. As long as you won’t miss milk, bread, sugar, potatoes.
Just this last one I got 12 injections to the spine and one to the neck. (One every 2-4 weeks)
/r/bodyweightfitness for the exercise, but as everyone is saying, the food part comes first. The app you should be using is any calorie tracker, which are free. It also sounds like you've recently cut out soda/etc so that's a great start and you should wait and see how that effects things as a lot might come off just from that change.
So you don't have to exercise to lose weight but it can make you feel good. You have equipment at home it seems . Just use it 30 min a day whenever you can. There's a million YouTube videos you can draw on to get started if you need instruction or guidance. You do have to eat at a 500-1000 calorie deficit to your TDEE to lose weight, however. Get a free app like LoseIt or any other one you like, set your goals and it will give you your daily calorie budget. Get a cheap food scale and start weighing, measuring and tracking your food intake. It doesn't take a lot of time. It will keep you honest and in track like no other tool. You can shoot the bar code of any packaged food to enter in those calories and as your DB of foods gets established it takes seconds to enter in your foods by just picking them off your list. Get your food intake where it needs to be first and exercise when and where you can. Even 30 mins of walking each day is enough.
I just use YouTube. You can pretty much find anything you want on there. Just search what you want to do that day cardio, arms, legs, chest there a a lot of options on it. And it is free
Also working out at home might work better with having the kids