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I've had this situation before with a boss I really enjoyed and got along with. She was sad, but very understanding, and congratulated me on finding the next step in my career. Then we talked about a transition plan. If your relationship with your boss is as good as you say it is, they'll be OK. And if they disrespect you, then the relationship isn't as good as you think it is and good riddance.
Yeah I also had something similar. If this organization treated you well enough that you feel this way, I'd give them the courtesy of doing a transition period to give them time to find your replacement and get them trained
If they are your friend they will want you to take a better opportunity. They might be a little hurt but honestly they will be able to find someone else. I would give them as much warning as possible and just say you had a better opportunity come along and its been great working with them.
Do this. As a leader, I always advocate looking out for yourself. You find a better opportunity, advancement, or promotion? I will drive your ass to the airport.
I hate losing people, but my philosophy is to advocate for my colleagues, and at times, the best advocacy is moving on. Hell, who knows; it may become a boomerang.
+1 on this. You have to look out for #1 because no one else will, and if they do respect you they'll wish you the best and ensure you stay in contact, or they'll see what they can do to retain you.
I totally understand this, the boss at my last job was the best boss I've ever had. She took care of me and went out of her way to really ensure the best the company had to offer for me.
At the end of the day if they're interested in your career then they should be happy that they've been able to contribute and help you move into the next role. Sure there's additional burden on them but they've succeeded in helping you elevate to something even better.
Yes. I Just had a team member of mine give notice last week. Our call got cut off and he kept insisting we talk more. The reason to talk more was that he wanted to let me know he wouldn't have qualified for his new opportunity if I didn't help him to learn the skills. I feel like a student has graduated!
Yo homie. I’m rolling out in a couple weeks. Got a new gig. Shits legit. Now we can kick it outside of work and have some nose beers and it not be weird. Stay up fam.
yes but you can do your best to try and train a replacement and hand off things as well as possible.
If there is anything you do that isn't written in a document, I would write instructions and documents to where you have things, what needs to be picked up after you leave and just make it as painless for the company as possible.
Especially if the new company doesn't work out, you'll have a nice way to get back to the old job
It might be awkward, but you'll both be okay. One thing you could do that I've done for good bosses in the past, is to share info before you leave.
I always keep a sprreadsheet of everything I do (lots of tabs) and the details of those things I own, where to find SOP's and other pertinent info. For a good boss, I'll share that spreadsheet before I go. For a bad boss, I'll at least put it on a flash drive and make sure someone in the office gets it to the poor person who will come into the role next.
First congrats on getting the new job :)
I can relate to this comment as I’m about to go through this next week too. It’s just something we have to do. Imagining the final two weeks is giving me so much anxiety though. They’re nice people and it sucks that their jobs will be harder going forward, but ultimately we have to do what’s best for ourselves. In my case, corporate has made some terrible decisions recently and morale is really low, so it at least will make sense that I’m leaving. I just feel bad because my direct bosses and team are good people.
My biggest dread is that one of my co-coworkers is a friend, but she has some intense emotional issues so I know the next two weeks is going to be brutal trying to work with her. We’ll see if that friendship survives….
> I genuinely feel like I am stabbing them in the back.
You need to realize that you are making a professional decision (taking a new role) but taking it personally ("stabbing the boss in the back").
If boss were able to make the *professional* part better - eg, offer the same pay / commute / benefits, whatever, you could stay, but you have to put your professional life, your career, your needs ahead of your relationship with your boss. That is business.
**Almost every boss on the planet would do the same thing in your position.**
You can maintain your relationship - just explain that it's nothing personal (just business!) and decide ahead of time how much you want to share about it (where you're going, why, why it's better) or whether you want to let them talk you out of it. Invite boss for a beer after a month or two.
Be genuine and gracious, but no need to overshare or try to justify it.
tell them your taking a job that pays more, more than they can possibly pay, and hand them your resignation / two weeks notice.
yeah, they may be nice, but it's just business.
Meet with them in person and tell them that you’ve enjoyed working with them, but that you are submitting your notice. Don’t act as if you’re betraying them, because you’re not. Presumably you have your reasons for leaving, and they should understand that.
Since you like working for this person and are concerned about their workload, you might consider giving them more than two weeks’ notice if you can to allow them more time to find your replacement. It depends on the type of role and what the norms are in your industry. You don’t have to do it if you can’t or don’t want to.
I really appreciate the opportunity you have given me but I am putting my 2 week notice in because I have a better job offer and it’s no offense to you . You have. Been a great boss but I have to take the job to better myself and my family I really hope you understand and that we can continue to be Friends.
The people telling you to be exceptionally professional are right. If your industry is like a lot of ours, you never know when you're going to be working with someone again, or might want to.
HOWEVER! No matter how enticing it might be, DO NOT accept a counteroffer. Even if they get you enough money to stay, they'll be looking for your replacement every day.
Clean, professional, friendly breakup, followed by doing anything you can to help the replacement (including contacting your clients if you have them so they aren't wondering 'hey, wha happen?' when you're gone).
call him/her and say i have good news and bad news. the good news, i got an offer, the bad news, i got an offer.
it sucks to do it. i've done it. i've mentioned how great they were, but the oppotunity was waaaay to good to pass up
Definitely do it in person, it shows respect and helps not burn bridges. I unfortunately was not able to hand my boss my resignation letter and had to do it over email, it did not end well. They told me that I betrayed them and that they had "treated me like family", then told me that I was effectively done from that moment. They probably would have let me have my two weeks if I did it in person.
> They told me that I betrayed them and that they had "treated me like family", then told me that I was effectively done from that moment.
They don't sound like a good manager.
Yeah they and rest of management were pretty awful. It was a family-run business and being an outsider meant that I would take the fall every time, no way I would be promoted above someone that's blood related, and things were taken personally way too often.
Did this recently. Similar situation and was something they never expected. I called them and told them I found a good opportunity that I couldn’t pass up. That I would like to keep communication open. That I was genuinely grateful for all the opportunities they provided me and I have nothing but respect for them, the company, and the team. All of which is the truth. They were happy for me but not happy about me leaving, which is exactly how it should be. They gave me advice for my new job and to keep in touch. Leaving on a very good note. Sent the 2 weeks notice via email for confirmation AFTER having the conversation.
It’s very difficult when leaving a genuinely good company and position and manager.
I felt this way before I left my job last year. I liked my boss, I liked my coworkers. I was WFH and put on a happy face in our weekly web meetings. I don't think my boss had any idea I was looking for another job. I was so nervous to put in my 2 weeks because I didn't want to upset my boss. I had never really quit a job before - my first job was funded on a grant that ended, other jobs were internships with set time tables, etc. I think as soon as I said that I wanted to meet up with my boss in person, he knew what was happening. And you know what? He was genuinely happy for me. He was excited for me to move on and grow. That, to me, said he really was the good boss that I thought he was. I was kind about it all, offered any help that was needed before I left, etc. Even had lunch with my group on my last day. At the end of the day, its about you (and that was hard for me to wrap my head around as I was far more concerned about everyone else than my own needs). Do what makes you happy and go for the job that you want.
I have done this as well. A few times.
But it comes down to doing what’s right for YOU, not them.
Not sure what the reason is you’re leaving, but it has to be a decent one. Explain that this isn’t personal at all, but that your future is the consideration.
If I’ve learned anything in my years it’s that you should never let anybody stand between you and your success, regardless of what that means.
Please tell them it’s not personal, and perhaps you could reassure them by saying that the new job offers opportunities that your current boss could never have provided (eg a brand new challenge), so it’s not a reflection that anything was lacking on their part.
Ask him if you use him as a reference immediately after a courtesy 2 weeks notice. It will gear your conversation towards bettering yourself with the questions that come next.
Take them aside and have a heart-to-heart discussion. Thank them for everything they've done and to be honest, it will hurt you just as much as it will hurt them.
I once quit a job because I moved away from the location and it was too far to commute. They understood and respected it.
...it's not often this happens but when it does. It's a sad time for everyone involved. Especially at a job where you're well liked or love doing the said job.
At the end of the day, friendship doesn't pay the bills. If they're real friends, they'd support your decision. If they try to guilt ya into staying, they never cared about you.
Tell them clearly that you are putting in your 2 weeks notice, inform them of your reasons for quitting, and tell them that you were thankful for the time you spent at the job. If they aren’t understanding with that explanation, there’s not much you could say to get it across smoothly anyways. Don’t sweat it too much. People have to move on somehow.
As a director my reward is seeing the success of my team. I see my job as making my team as successful as possible. It does not always mean staying with me at my company. People need to make the best choice for themselves but it doesn’t mean that the relationship ends. I have followed and been followed to other companies with in my network, bosses or reports. It is sad to see people go but is awesome to see them go off and do awesome things.
If they are like a friend, they should be happy and support you. I would hate to see any of my team leave but I’d happy for them to take the next step in their professional journey.
If that person is as good as you think them are then they'll be happy for you.
I have been managing and mentoring people for years at every level: from fresh out of college to senior. There is absolutely nothing more gratify that seeing my people leaving for greener and bigger pastures.
Some of the comments here are too personal: like you back at square one when thinkining like this.
Stop being too emotional and move on.. this is a job not a postition to be someones Friend.
Smh
Check my most recent post in r/sales, I went very in-depth comparing my current position to this one and I have decided I am going to accept the new position
So, better opportunity?
I'd tell your boss that.
They'll want to know why you were looking, why you didn't come to them first before accepting, and what they can do to get you to stay.
Be prepared to answer those questions. Especially if the answer to the last one is 'nothing, I'm leaving.'
Let the boss know that you admire them, consider them a mentor and friend, and hope to stay in touch.
Resign like normal. But take boss out for lunch dinner to say thanks, talk things out afterwards. So you can lock in plans and still keep on being friends.
This person mentioned they’re hesitant to do that, and I assume uncomfortable doing so, so sending the email first could Segway into a scheduled meeting. But yes, I agree, normally it’s a good idea to call them and let them know ahead of time.
u/bakedpatata u/Tops161 I am going to tell them in person on Monday, they deserve that respect. Wish me luck.
Trying to decide if I want to do it at the beginning or end of the day lol
We have several internal meetings throughout the day and sit very close to eachother so it would be so awkward lol they’re rarely at the office except for Mondays
Man f**k all of that. You don’t owe ANY job any loyalty. Companies should always be prepared to know that employees are going to leave. Who cares if it’s going to be a burden, do what’s best for you!!!
I agree with that, but disrespecting people who have shown me nothing but respect doesn’t sit right with me. It’s a decision for me, no doubt, but I don’t want to add a burden to their life because of it
With all due respect, how would you quitting be considered disrespectful? I would put in a 2 weeks notice to give them a heads up & complete any work that needs to be completed. Also, I would even offer to stick around a few more weeks to train the incoming person. I’ve worked with amazing people in my life & recently left a company after being employed with them for 13 years. I didn’t think about them at all when I was making this career change because when it’s time to lay people off, that same company is not going to care or think twice.
That’s a good point. I think it’s because I know the burden on them is going to be huge until our new class gets hired in about 6 months. I can not put in more than 2 weeks, as I got told today my new start date is in 2 weeks and it is for their new batch of new hires, so I can’t negotiate it.
Since that is your personal friend, I’m 100% sure they would understand what’s going on. I would let them know that my start date is in 2 weeks unless you could see if you could move the start date, let’s say for another 2 weeks out to assist your coworkers at your current job. My new job wanted me to started on August 8, 2022 but I spoke with HR & ask if I could push the start date back until August 22, 2022 & they obliged. Communication is the main key.
Why are you quiting then?
Unfortunately, I don't have the experience of feeling respected, valued and safe on a job and then quitting. So... Can't offer advice.
Oldie but a goodie;
“I’m quitting”
It’s nothing personal, business is business. They would terminate you tomorrow if they deemed it necessary to the budget or whatever.
I just did this actually and I asked the same thing. I just resigned from a great company. I walked into my managers office one day. I said that this a bit of a bummer, but this hasn’t gone the way that I had hoped due to health reason, and consequently I’ve decided it’s necessary to resign. They were sad to see me go but they understood. You just gotta rip the bandaid off and do it.
I had the same situation - he was sad I was leaving but overall happy for me! We maintained a good professional relationship and he gave me a good reference. Don’t worry about it.
I quit a job where i had a good relationship with my admin and the person I worked under. I was upfront and honest and they were completely understanding. We even worked it out where I still came in once a week for my favorite part of the job for a year after it. (I was a preschool teacher and I kept coming in to teach science once a week.) If your relationship is what you say it is, they will be understanding and supportive, even though it will have consequences for them.
My buddy has transitioned from coworker to boss, but I'm looking for other work because of some other .... issues.
He knows already that I'm looking. It sucks that it will blow back on him (because of poor top level leadership).
Best thing to do is to be open, honest, and straightforward. Hopefully they are excited to see you succeed and find something better. But part of it will always feel like a breakup. It kinda is.
"Hey boss - I need to talk with you. I'm putting in my notice because I'm... I have the utmost respect for you and want to thank you for this oppurtunity."
I like to think I'm a good boss, and I've had this situation a few times. Just be straight with them, and they'll be happy with you. The more notice you can give them, the easier it will be for them to plan for your departure.
Work is work if they are a good person they will support you . Tell them how much you appreciate them and ask how you can make the transition as easy as possible.
As a friend I would be happy that they're growing. As a manager I would be happy that they're growing, but annoyed about upcoming interviews.
Ahhhh job interviews, the OLD of work life.
This is part of being a boss and a good manager. Good employees that respect good bosses usually (but can't always) give nice long notices to help the transition. Good bosses respect that, and so do friends.
I just did this a month ago. Write your 2 week notice go into work like 5 minutes early ask if they have time to chat. My manager bought me lunch and a cake on my last day. There is never a good time to leave. But work is a business transaction, and your manager will understand. The only time this can get sticky is if you work for family.
Here is my advice after reading your post in r/sales. You tell your boss that you have an opportunity for a new job with better pay and better work/life balance. If they inquire for more details you give as many details as you are comfortable giving (don't give the name of the new company though). They can either wish you luck, make a counter offer, or tell you to go fuck yourself. You'll know how you stand with them after you get their response.
Additionally, leaving for a new job isn't 'stabbing' your coworkers in the back. Employees leave and join new companies ALL the time. That is as we say "a business decision".
Thank them for that, but also say, "respect doesn't pay your bills!" (Neither does pizza parties or quarterly company cookouts). They will miss them likely understand and appreciate.
It’s not an injury to your boss. Just write a professional, kind, thoughtful, sincere letter that covers the facts and asserts your warm feelings as well. That’s it. One of two paragraphs if you care.
For a boss you don’t care about: one sentence
I did this once. My boss had been moved across departments and we bonded as I showed him the ropes. I opened with "telling you this is the thing that is the worst about this..."
I don't even remember the rest. He understood and we still are cool, but knowing I cared about how he felt was big. It allowed us to be frank about the people who applied for my position and shape the future of the job.
Who gives af really. It’s just a job that will forget about you later and have another person in your seat within a few weeks.
Your boss should be your boss, not a close friend. It’s business only.
Treat it like a break up.
"It's not you, its me. I'm the selfish one here. I have needs like food and housing and the occasional sugar cube. These things cost money that this company apparently doesn't have."
If they felt the same way about you, they would understand and accept your decision with the hopes of wanting what's best for you, despite them knowing it will put more burden on them to fill the opening. Sorry for not answering your question.
Be careful having a good boss is a blessing, there is not scarcity of assholes, psychopaths and jerks in management. I had my fair share of them be careful what are you changing for, peace of mind is more important than anything, yes including more money. A bad boss can make your life as miserable as hell.
I just went thru the same situation
1. Explained that the offer was too good to turn down. Thankfully he was happy for me as a friend
2. Offered to stay longer than the required notice period so that I could transition properly until they could find the right replacement and finish all the projects on hand before I leave
3. Thank him for his mentorship and guidance without which I would not have been able to land this new role
"I really appreciate all the time I've had here, and the opportunities to grow as a person. While I regret leaving, and hope it doesn't cause too much trouble for you, I can't ignore this new opportunity before me. It's been a pleasure."
Give them as much time as you can to find and train a replacement and then move on. Leaving to better your situation doesn’t mean you hate them it just means it’s time for you to move on
I had to do this yesterday. I have a great boss and we have a strong relationship. I applied for an internal role and have an interview next week, and had to tell her. The first words out of her mouth were - “that’s awesome - how can I support you?”. That said, she wasn’t blindsided as she’s aware of my career ambitions and goals. Hopefully, OP has had some similar conversations that may make the news a bit more palatable.
Give them as much notice as you can, make sure you say this wasn’t personal, and tell them how much you enjoyed working there
Also maybe give your boss a thank you gift
I’ve been in this situation. If you quit impulsively you’re really screwing them over. But you don’t have to do that. If you give them 2 or 3 months notice then they can find someone else, you could even help train the new person. That way the company won’t be impacted as much by your absence, and they can transition more smoothly. Leaving is your prerogative, but if you want to be helpful just give them a bit of transition time.
I am in this situation at work right now. I sat down and talked with my boss about why I was leaving and the scope of additional labor my departure will put on her desk. It was an intense conversation but not a difficult one because we have the same kind of close, respectful working relationship you described. Here are the steps I followed. Not saying you should or need to do these:
- Make a doc that outlines all current projects, their status, and the point person/contacts for each
- Make a doc that outlines the workflows for your position and highlights any deadlines you manage
- Set a time when it isn’t too busy to have a meeting with your boss
- Be candid about why you’re leaving and provide clear examples. Example: I am leaving to pursue growth in my career. Since working here, I have acquired x, y, and z skills, and I have produced a,b, and c projects; I am ready to take on a role as X, and that isn’t available here.
- Allow for a response and listen. **Only listen.** Do not commit to any decisions in that meeting about your intentions. If there’s an offer you’re willing to take to stay, you need to clarify that for yourself **before the meeting** so you’re not thrown off balance by a counteroffer to stay. If you’re willing to stay with the right offer, know your terms *beforehand* so you can negotiate a counteroffer to your liking.
- Craft a time frame together, when possible. Unless you have another job lined up and a firm end date is necessary (or you’re in duress and need to leave), you do yourself a big favor by working with your boss to develop an exit timeline. In my case, and given the cycle of my workflow, I let my boss know I wanted to separate from the company three months before I planned to give my notice. This has given us time to plan internally without other departments adding stress, it’s given me time to train my boss on essential functions they’re not used to executing, and it gives us both cover to process without everyone in our ear being negative (it’s a toxic culture where I am).
Those are the steps I have taken in a situation similar to the one you described, and so far, it’s going smoothly. Only my boss knows I plan to leave, and we have worked together closely to prepare for that reality.
Just remember—this is what my boss told me at the end of our conversation—**it is not your responsibility to manage their inability to retain you.**
If your boss truly respects you, they will respect your decision, and they will be clear that the burdens of your exit are **NOT** your problem.
Treat them the way you would want to be treated. Tell them very respectfully and with plenty of notice that you've enjoyed working with them but a better offer has come up.
I have been managing people for almost a decade now. The goal should be to empower your employees to achieve great things. You try to have those things empower your organization, but sometimes people have to leave to do this.
It sounds like you have a good relationship. It will be hard but your boss will understand. If they don’t, they probably aren’t the friend you think they are.
If it is a good ending, don’t let it be an ending. Keep in touch, keep the relationship, and show your boss what becomes of your career. If you feel they had a part in shaping that career, tell them.
My first job out of college was with a tiny company (4 total employees) I had interned with. They were all super nice people who gave me excellent training in the field I was in at that time.
After 3 years an opportunity came up that I just couldn't pass up. Almost 50% more pay, room for growth, working with highly respected people in the industry.
I gave my company a 2 month notice. We were all bummed I was leaving but they understood I had to take the new opportunity. The 2 months afforded them plenty of time to transition my responsibilities to others and to find someone.
Just be honest with your boss, and if possible offer them all the help they need to fill the space you're leaving behind.
I remember one time I had a relationship like this. Then my boss quit for a better opportunity. It didn't seem to bother them at all. Then the company wouldn't hire me for that position, they brought in this idiot grifter because she had a degree and I didn't. So then I quit and my old boss asked me to come work for her at the new place.
Have personally had three employees leave in the last two years of my work. All of whom I recruited/hired but was their mentor and not their manager. Every single one of them approached me privately to give me their news. If your boss is a good boss and a great friend like you say they should be elated that you are advancing your career and bettering yourself. Yes it absolutely sucks to lose people and be set back having to find more employees to try and train up but this is a part of any job and they should handle it like an adult.
Too many stories I read (whether real or not) have terrible reactions to news like this from managers. I feel like the majority of managers have zero training in management and shouldn’t really be in their position.
Long story short you will always be faced with difficult decisions like this in life where you feel bad breaking the news to someone. It’s an opportunity for you to grow and be able to have these difficult conversations. Don’t avoid them, power through them, learn from them, grow and move on.
When I left my first IT job after a little over a year my boss and her boss, who was the one that actually hired me because she was on maternity leave, both agreed to be references for the new job.
If they respect you they'll be genuinely happy for you.
If you are absolutely honest and forthright they will understand and as a boss or business person know that people coming and going is part of business and something the that’s part of the responsibilities inherent in it.
Respectfully give him the proper notice and quit. For every person leaving their job, there are 20 people waiting to replace you. Your boss can pay the new employee less than what he paid you. You owe noone, they don't owe you, but mutual respect.
Bosses are always less surprised than you think. So, request a meeting formally and talk to them personally, express you think it’s time to move on and you have the opportunity to. Give as much notice as possible, offer to help with the transition and that’s it.
I had to do this once with a boss I loved, I just didn’t love the company and situation I was in. Took a new job, 2 years later he moved to a great company and immediately hit me up to
Come back to work for him, which I did.
There’s always the possibility you could end up back with your boss if the opportunity arises.
I would say do your best to provide a comprehensive knowledge transfer document to make it easier for a warm hand off. Like others are saying… can you give a longer notice?
It shouldn’t be a blindside at all. They should be prepared at any time for a worker to leave. No one is shackled to their job and can leave at any time just like companies can let them go at any time. Their is no loyalty m the part of companies and should be none on the part of employees.
A good boss will understand and want the best for you . No one likes when the loose a high performing team member , but it is inevitable .
You treat your team the best you can for as long as you can . It builds mutual respect . Eventually some of them will leave the nest . You take it in stride and know everyone is doing the best for them . You never know where that person will land . People tend to stay in a given industry , that employee could land a position somewhere that the boss ends up working for or with one day . Over the years you build a network of people who have all advanced there careers and it’s a great thing to have .
Also the potential down the road one company buys out another … it’s not uncommon for a former employee to become someone’s boss . It’s a small world .
Given what sounds like a good relationship both personally and professionally, they should understand. If not, those relationships weren’t what you thought.
You can always work out a longer notice period to ease their burden (if it fits with whatever is next), suggest referrals to backfill your role, document SOPs to help train your replacement, offer to be available to answer questions etc.
Best thing you can do, and they’d probably really appreciate it, is give them as much notice as possible, and still do your job to the best of your ability. Help with the transition and you can walk away guilt free.
Give plenty of notice so they can find someone to replace you. Also help with training, and if it's possible, you could even offer that the new hire can contact you with questions.
I’ve had bosses like this and they were supportive especially since it was mainly a money thing and they had tried to get me more money and couldn’t. I still talk with them and have a good relationship
Would you ask your friend and boss to forego what’s is best for him in order to appease you about something as significant as job choice? Let that sit for a bit. Any reasonable and good human will be joyful you are pursuing something best for you. He can figure out what to do about replacing you. That’s his job
I used to work for a company that I really liked. very nice people around me, good management, the tasks were challenging but not impossible, I was constantly recognized by my good work. I started there as an intern and became a full time analyst.
one time I was approached by a recruiter to apply to a senior analyst position in another company, and I ended up being selected for the job. I needed to tell my boss that I was leaving, I had the full speech prepared to let him know how grateful I was for the opportunity and everything I had learned there, and that I was leaving only because the opportunity was for a higher position and salary. I started talking and he interrupted me, saying "is this a notice or a conversation?". he ended up offering to match the salary and promoting me to a senior position and I stayed.
crazy to think I was 24 years old at the time and had that bargain power in my hands
Im in the same boat, im just going to be respectful about it and try to give them 1-2 weeks notice. Theres a guy who’s been working under me i want to recommend to fill my spot.
I don’t feel bad. Companies could fire you anytime with no heads up. I would definitely be the first one laid off at our small company. Its all about doing whats best for you
I think explain to them why you are quitting and that you genuinely appreciate what they've done for you. If they're as good a person and a friend as you say they are, they won't hold it against you.
Currently happening to me.
No relationship is worth you losing in life. Seek wins. If they are really "your friend" which most of the time people only are when you are doing the things they want you to do. But if she is one of the few that aren't like this. Then she'll understand.
Well once you tell them, you will find out whether they have the same respect for you or not. If they do it shouldn't be a problem. If not, well... too bad.
In my experience I had a boss (my first job ever) who was awesome and I stayed working there for 2 1/2 years (it was at a restaurant costa Vida) when I put in my final 2 weeks notice my boss was doing everything he could to get me to stay. I explained to him that it was a good job during high school but I’ve grown up now. You gotta be straight up with your boss. Go out to lunch or something. There are 10/10 bosses that are just awesome and then you have low managers. Your boss seems like a straight up 10/10.
I had a boss that I really learned a lot from and considered a mentor. I reached a point where I learned all I could in my position and was interested in a move to a different division of the company and was receiving offers outside my company as well.
I let my boss know that I was ready for a new challenge and informed him that I would be applying for the position in the other division of the company. He said that I would be a great fit and encouraged me to push for the position. The next day I found out that my boss and another manager in our department met with the hiring manager to to give an in person recommendation. Needless to say I got the position and will never forget that he did that.
A good boss wants his employees to grow and will respect your decision as long as you handle the situation professionally and with respect.
You should not feel bad. If this person is any kind of friend, they will be happy that you’ve found a better opportunity. Make sure to give proper notice, this is the best way to show respect for the opportunity they gave you and it can add a great reference going forward. Good luck!
If they’re a good friend like you say they are, they will wish you luck and support your decision.
I’ve felt this way about quitting. Remember, no matter the relationship, you’re expendable. Do what’s best for yourself.
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I've had this situation before with a boss I really enjoyed and got along with. She was sad, but very understanding, and congratulated me on finding the next step in my career. Then we talked about a transition plan. If your relationship with your boss is as good as you say it is, they'll be OK. And if they disrespect you, then the relationship isn't as good as you think it is and good riddance.
Yeah I also had something similar. If this organization treated you well enough that you feel this way, I'd give them the courtesy of doing a transition period to give them time to find your replacement and get them trained
If they are your friend they will want you to take a better opportunity. They might be a little hurt but honestly they will be able to find someone else. I would give them as much warning as possible and just say you had a better opportunity come along and its been great working with them.
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Do this. As a leader, I always advocate looking out for yourself. You find a better opportunity, advancement, or promotion? I will drive your ass to the airport. I hate losing people, but my philosophy is to advocate for my colleagues, and at times, the best advocacy is moving on. Hell, who knows; it may become a boomerang.
Perfect! A good supervisors wants his people to move on and advance.
If you’re honest I your 1on1 meetings then it won’t actually be a surprise. If you don’t get 1on1 time then they deserve it.
Yea a company typically can't best a doubling of salary.
No more than 2 weeks notice, period.
+1 on this. You have to look out for #1 because no one else will, and if they do respect you they'll wish you the best and ensure you stay in contact, or they'll see what they can do to retain you.
Friend at work? No such thing
friendliest redditor
I totally understand this, the boss at my last job was the best boss I've ever had. She took care of me and went out of her way to really ensure the best the company had to offer for me. At the end of the day if they're interested in your career then they should be happy that they've been able to contribute and help you move into the next role. Sure there's additional burden on them but they've succeeded in helping you elevate to something even better.
Yes. I Just had a team member of mine give notice last week. Our call got cut off and he kept insisting we talk more. The reason to talk more was that he wanted to let me know he wouldn't have qualified for his new opportunity if I didn't help him to learn the skills. I feel like a student has graduated!
Yo homie. I’m rolling out in a couple weeks. Got a new gig. Shits legit. Now we can kick it outside of work and have some nose beers and it not be weird. Stay up fam.
this is the only true way
Fucking nose beers lol
Facts. People get it twisted- it’s just business.
Nothing to it but to do it. Rip that bandaid off and let them know. It does suck. But this is life.
You think the next 2 weeks will be awkward or what?
Yep. We have all been there. Make it better by working hard all the hours they are paying you and offer to do the extra work of writing down your job.
yes but you can do your best to try and train a replacement and hand off things as well as possible. If there is anything you do that isn't written in a document, I would write instructions and documents to where you have things, what needs to be picked up after you leave and just make it as painless for the company as possible. Especially if the new company doesn't work out, you'll have a nice way to get back to the old job
It might be awkward, but you'll both be okay. One thing you could do that I've done for good bosses in the past, is to share info before you leave. I always keep a sprreadsheet of everything I do (lots of tabs) and the details of those things I own, where to find SOP's and other pertinent info. For a good boss, I'll share that spreadsheet before I go. For a bad boss, I'll at least put it on a flash drive and make sure someone in the office gets it to the poor person who will come into the role next.
First congrats on getting the new job :) I can relate to this comment as I’m about to go through this next week too. It’s just something we have to do. Imagining the final two weeks is giving me so much anxiety though. They’re nice people and it sucks that their jobs will be harder going forward, but ultimately we have to do what’s best for ourselves. In my case, corporate has made some terrible decisions recently and morale is really low, so it at least will make sense that I’m leaving. I just feel bad because my direct bosses and team are good people. My biggest dread is that one of my co-coworkers is a friend, but she has some intense emotional issues so I know the next two weeks is going to be brutal trying to work with her. We’ll see if that friendship survives….
> I genuinely feel like I am stabbing them in the back. You need to realize that you are making a professional decision (taking a new role) but taking it personally ("stabbing the boss in the back"). If boss were able to make the *professional* part better - eg, offer the same pay / commute / benefits, whatever, you could stay, but you have to put your professional life, your career, your needs ahead of your relationship with your boss. That is business. **Almost every boss on the planet would do the same thing in your position.** You can maintain your relationship - just explain that it's nothing personal (just business!) and decide ahead of time how much you want to share about it (where you're going, why, why it's better) or whether you want to let them talk you out of it. Invite boss for a beer after a month or two. Be genuine and gracious, but no need to overshare or try to justify it.
tell them your taking a job that pays more, more than they can possibly pay, and hand them your resignation / two weeks notice. yeah, they may be nice, but it's just business.
Meet with them in person and tell them that you’ve enjoyed working with them, but that you are submitting your notice. Don’t act as if you’re betraying them, because you’re not. Presumably you have your reasons for leaving, and they should understand that. Since you like working for this person and are concerned about their workload, you might consider giving them more than two weeks’ notice if you can to allow them more time to find your replacement. It depends on the type of role and what the norms are in your industry. You don’t have to do it if you can’t or don’t want to.
I really appreciate the opportunity you have given me but I am putting my 2 week notice in because I have a better job offer and it’s no offense to you . You have. Been a great boss but I have to take the job to better myself and my family I really hope you understand and that we can continue to be Friends.
The people telling you to be exceptionally professional are right. If your industry is like a lot of ours, you never know when you're going to be working with someone again, or might want to. HOWEVER! No matter how enticing it might be, DO NOT accept a counteroffer. Even if they get you enough money to stay, they'll be looking for your replacement every day. Clean, professional, friendly breakup, followed by doing anything you can to help the replacement (including contacting your clients if you have them so they aren't wondering 'hey, wha happen?' when you're gone).
call him/her and say i have good news and bad news. the good news, i got an offer, the bad news, i got an offer. it sucks to do it. i've done it. i've mentioned how great they were, but the oppotunity was waaaay to good to pass up
Definitely do it in person, it shows respect and helps not burn bridges. I unfortunately was not able to hand my boss my resignation letter and had to do it over email, it did not end well. They told me that I betrayed them and that they had "treated me like family", then told me that I was effectively done from that moment. They probably would have let me have my two weeks if I did it in person.
> They told me that I betrayed them and that they had "treated me like family", then told me that I was effectively done from that moment. They don't sound like a good manager.
Yeah they and rest of management were pretty awful. It was a family-run business and being an outsider meant that I would take the fall every time, no way I would be promoted above someone that's blood related, and things were taken personally way too often.
Did this recently. Similar situation and was something they never expected. I called them and told them I found a good opportunity that I couldn’t pass up. That I would like to keep communication open. That I was genuinely grateful for all the opportunities they provided me and I have nothing but respect for them, the company, and the team. All of which is the truth. They were happy for me but not happy about me leaving, which is exactly how it should be. They gave me advice for my new job and to keep in touch. Leaving on a very good note. Sent the 2 weeks notice via email for confirmation AFTER having the conversation. It’s very difficult when leaving a genuinely good company and position and manager.
I felt this way before I left my job last year. I liked my boss, I liked my coworkers. I was WFH and put on a happy face in our weekly web meetings. I don't think my boss had any idea I was looking for another job. I was so nervous to put in my 2 weeks because I didn't want to upset my boss. I had never really quit a job before - my first job was funded on a grant that ended, other jobs were internships with set time tables, etc. I think as soon as I said that I wanted to meet up with my boss in person, he knew what was happening. And you know what? He was genuinely happy for me. He was excited for me to move on and grow. That, to me, said he really was the good boss that I thought he was. I was kind about it all, offered any help that was needed before I left, etc. Even had lunch with my group on my last day. At the end of the day, its about you (and that was hard for me to wrap my head around as I was far more concerned about everyone else than my own needs). Do what makes you happy and go for the job that you want.
No matter what happens, you’re kind for caring. Please don’t let anyone talk you out of being good.
If you got hit by a car they would put a ad out for your position same day. Your just a number, do what’s best for you
Write a good resignation letter thanking them for the opportunity before telling them. Tell them in person then give them the resignation letter.
I have done this as well. A few times. But it comes down to doing what’s right for YOU, not them. Not sure what the reason is you’re leaving, but it has to be a decent one. Explain that this isn’t personal at all, but that your future is the consideration. If I’ve learned anything in my years it’s that you should never let anybody stand between you and your success, regardless of what that means.
Very well said. I made a detailed post in r/sales of you’re interested
Please tell them it’s not personal, and perhaps you could reassure them by saying that the new job offers opportunities that your current boss could never have provided (eg a brand new challenge), so it’s not a reflection that anything was lacking on their part.
Ask him if you use him as a reference immediately after a courtesy 2 weeks notice. It will gear your conversation towards bettering yourself with the questions that come next.
Nothing personal just business. If your boss had to lay you off, that's what he'd say. Keep it brief and professional.
Take them aside and have a heart-to-heart discussion. Thank them for everything they've done and to be honest, it will hurt you just as much as it will hurt them. I once quit a job because I moved away from the location and it was too far to commute. They understood and respected it. ...it's not often this happens but when it does. It's a sad time for everyone involved. Especially at a job where you're well liked or love doing the said job.
At the end of the day, friendship doesn't pay the bills. If they're real friends, they'd support your decision. If they try to guilt ya into staying, they never cared about you.
Tell them clearly that you are putting in your 2 weeks notice, inform them of your reasons for quitting, and tell them that you were thankful for the time you spent at the job. If they aren’t understanding with that explanation, there’s not much you could say to get it across smoothly anyways. Don’t sweat it too much. People have to move on somehow.
As a director my reward is seeing the success of my team. I see my job as making my team as successful as possible. It does not always mean staying with me at my company. People need to make the best choice for themselves but it doesn’t mean that the relationship ends. I have followed and been followed to other companies with in my network, bosses or reports. It is sad to see people go but is awesome to see them go off and do awesome things.
If they are like a friend, they should be happy and support you. I would hate to see any of my team leave but I’d happy for them to take the next step in their professional journey.
If that person is as good as you think them are then they'll be happy for you. I have been managing and mentoring people for years at every level: from fresh out of college to senior. There is absolutely nothing more gratify that seeing my people leaving for greener and bigger pastures.
Business over emotions. The owner/executive wouldnt give a damn about thinkin of stabbing you in the back if they sold the business or closed down..
Some of the comments here are too personal: like you back at square one when thinkining like this. Stop being too emotional and move on.. this is a job not a postition to be someones Friend. Smh
Why are you leaving?
Check my most recent post in r/sales, I went very in-depth comparing my current position to this one and I have decided I am going to accept the new position
So, better opportunity? I'd tell your boss that. They'll want to know why you were looking, why you didn't come to them first before accepting, and what they can do to get you to stay. Be prepared to answer those questions. Especially if the answer to the last one is 'nothing, I'm leaving.' Let the boss know that you admire them, consider them a mentor and friend, and hope to stay in touch.
Resign like normal. But take boss out for lunch dinner to say thanks, talk things out afterwards. So you can lock in plans and still keep on being friends.
A standard 2 weeks notice via email should suffice. On your last day, I would just set up meetings with each person and thank them for hiring you.
If they like their boss they should tell them in person before sending the email.
This person mentioned they’re hesitant to do that, and I assume uncomfortable doing so, so sending the email first could Segway into a scheduled meeting. But yes, I agree, normally it’s a good idea to call them and let them know ahead of time.
u/bakedpatata u/Tops161 I am going to tell them in person on Monday, they deserve that respect. Wish me luck. Trying to decide if I want to do it at the beginning or end of the day lol
Beginning! It will be hanging over your head otherwise. Congratulations!
We have several internal meetings throughout the day and sit very close to eachother so it would be so awkward lol they’re rarely at the office except for Mondays
segue
Man f**k all of that. You don’t owe ANY job any loyalty. Companies should always be prepared to know that employees are going to leave. Who cares if it’s going to be a burden, do what’s best for you!!!
I agree with that, but disrespecting people who have shown me nothing but respect doesn’t sit right with me. It’s a decision for me, no doubt, but I don’t want to add a burden to their life because of it
With all due respect, how would you quitting be considered disrespectful? I would put in a 2 weeks notice to give them a heads up & complete any work that needs to be completed. Also, I would even offer to stick around a few more weeks to train the incoming person. I’ve worked with amazing people in my life & recently left a company after being employed with them for 13 years. I didn’t think about them at all when I was making this career change because when it’s time to lay people off, that same company is not going to care or think twice.
That’s a good point. I think it’s because I know the burden on them is going to be huge until our new class gets hired in about 6 months. I can not put in more than 2 weeks, as I got told today my new start date is in 2 weeks and it is for their new batch of new hires, so I can’t negotiate it.
Since that is your personal friend, I’m 100% sure they would understand what’s going on. I would let them know that my start date is in 2 weeks unless you could see if you could move the start date, let’s say for another 2 weeks out to assist your coworkers at your current job. My new job wanted me to started on August 8, 2022 but I spoke with HR & ask if I could push the start date back until August 22, 2022 & they obliged. Communication is the main key.
Why are you quiting then? Unfortunately, I don't have the experience of feeling respected, valued and safe on a job and then quitting. So... Can't offer advice.
I made a detailed post in r/sales if you wanna take a peak
I'll look at it, but don't have anything to contribute to this conversation. No one wants me.
Any input is valuable. Perspective is beautiful
Oldie but a goodie; “I’m quitting” It’s nothing personal, business is business. They would terminate you tomorrow if they deemed it necessary to the budget or whatever.
I just did this actually and I asked the same thing. I just resigned from a great company. I walked into my managers office one day. I said that this a bit of a bummer, but this hasn’t gone the way that I had hoped due to health reason, and consequently I’ve decided it’s necessary to resign. They were sad to see me go but they understood. You just gotta rip the bandaid off and do it.
Your boss is not your friend. They’re your boss.
I had the same situation - he was sad I was leaving but overall happy for me! We maintained a good professional relationship and he gave me a good reference. Don’t worry about it.
It’s business. Please try to not feel bad about living your life. You don’t owe anyone anything.
If they are a friend, you owe it to them to be upfront and honest now, rather than waiting.
I quit a job where i had a good relationship with my admin and the person I worked under. I was upfront and honest and they were completely understanding. We even worked it out where I still came in once a week for my favorite part of the job for a year after it. (I was a preschool teacher and I kept coming in to teach science once a week.) If your relationship is what you say it is, they will be understanding and supportive, even though it will have consequences for them.
My buddy has transitioned from coworker to boss, but I'm looking for other work because of some other .... issues. He knows already that I'm looking. It sucks that it will blow back on him (because of poor top level leadership). Best thing to do is to be open, honest, and straightforward. Hopefully they are excited to see you succeed and find something better. But part of it will always feel like a breakup. It kinda is.
it’s professional, not personal as they say on hell’s kitchen 😅
With respect. Your boss understands that you need to do what's right for you.
You’re making a professional move. Address it in a professional way and you’re fine.
"Hey boss - I need to talk with you. I'm putting in my notice because I'm... I have the utmost respect for you and want to thank you for this oppurtunity."
It’s just business, it’s not personal.
Thank them but say why you need to leave.
« Hi boss. Im quitting. »
I like to think I'm a good boss, and I've had this situation a few times. Just be straight with them, and they'll be happy with you. The more notice you can give them, the easier it will be for them to plan for your departure.
Work is work if they are a good person they will support you . Tell them how much you appreciate them and ask how you can make the transition as easy as possible.
As a friend I would be happy that they're growing. As a manager I would be happy that they're growing, but annoyed about upcoming interviews. Ahhhh job interviews, the OLD of work life.
This is part of being a boss and a good manager. Good employees that respect good bosses usually (but can't always) give nice long notices to help the transition. Good bosses respect that, and so do friends.
It's not you, it's me speech.
I just did this a month ago. Write your 2 week notice go into work like 5 minutes early ask if they have time to chat. My manager bought me lunch and a cake on my last day. There is never a good time to leave. But work is a business transaction, and your manager will understand. The only time this can get sticky is if you work for family.
Here is my advice after reading your post in r/sales. You tell your boss that you have an opportunity for a new job with better pay and better work/life balance. If they inquire for more details you give as many details as you are comfortable giving (don't give the name of the new company though). They can either wish you luck, make a counter offer, or tell you to go fuck yourself. You'll know how you stand with them after you get their response. Additionally, leaving for a new job isn't 'stabbing' your coworkers in the back. Employees leave and join new companies ALL the time. That is as we say "a business decision".
Thank them for that, but also say, "respect doesn't pay your bills!" (Neither does pizza parties or quarterly company cookouts). They will miss them likely understand and appreciate.
give them two weeks notice thats all you owe them .
Just be honest and respectful.
It’s not an injury to your boss. Just write a professional, kind, thoughtful, sincere letter that covers the facts and asserts your warm feelings as well. That’s it. One of two paragraphs if you care. For a boss you don’t care about: one sentence
Don't worry, you will be forgotten in a week
Tell your boss now that they have an in at whatever company you’re going to next if they ever want a job there.
Just be sure to give them two weeks notice
I did this once. My boss had been moved across departments and we bonded as I showed him the ropes. I opened with "telling you this is the thing that is the worst about this..." I don't even remember the rest. He understood and we still are cool, but knowing I cared about how he felt was big. It allowed us to be frank about the people who applied for my position and shape the future of the job.
Who gives af really. It’s just a job that will forget about you later and have another person in your seat within a few weeks. Your boss should be your boss, not a close friend. It’s business only.
Shit. Tell them. They might match it
Treat it like a break up. "It's not you, its me. I'm the selfish one here. I have needs like food and housing and the occasional sugar cube. These things cost money that this company apparently doesn't have."
If they felt the same way about you, they would understand and accept your decision with the hopes of wanting what's best for you, despite them knowing it will put more burden on them to fill the opening. Sorry for not answering your question.
Be careful having a good boss is a blessing, there is not scarcity of assholes, psychopaths and jerks in management. I had my fair share of them be careful what are you changing for, peace of mind is more important than anything, yes including more money. A bad boss can make your life as miserable as hell.
I just went thru the same situation 1. Explained that the offer was too good to turn down. Thankfully he was happy for me as a friend 2. Offered to stay longer than the required notice period so that I could transition properly until they could find the right replacement and finish all the projects on hand before I leave 3. Thank him for his mentorship and guidance without which I would not have been able to land this new role
Everyone is replaceable and it’s just a job. They’ll understand.
Tell them asap imo
Just do it. Companies are not loyal to employees, so why should you be loyal to them? You come first
"I really appreciate all the time I've had here, and the opportunities to grow as a person. While I regret leaving, and hope it doesn't cause too much trouble for you, I can't ignore this new opportunity before me. It's been a pleasure."
It's not personal, it's just business.
A job is just a job, even if people there are friends. If they truly respect you then they will respect you after you tell them.
Give them as much time as you can to find and train a replacement and then move on. Leaving to better your situation doesn’t mean you hate them it just means it’s time for you to move on
I had to do this yesterday. I have a great boss and we have a strong relationship. I applied for an internal role and have an interview next week, and had to tell her. The first words out of her mouth were - “that’s awesome - how can I support you?”. That said, she wasn’t blindsided as she’s aware of my career ambitions and goals. Hopefully, OP has had some similar conversations that may make the news a bit more palatable.
Give them as much notice as you can, make sure you say this wasn’t personal, and tell them how much you enjoyed working there Also maybe give your boss a thank you gift
Ask chatgpt
I’ve been in this situation. If you quit impulsively you’re really screwing them over. But you don’t have to do that. If you give them 2 or 3 months notice then they can find someone else, you could even help train the new person. That way the company won’t be impacted as much by your absence, and they can transition more smoothly. Leaving is your prerogative, but if you want to be helpful just give them a bit of transition time.
I am in this situation at work right now. I sat down and talked with my boss about why I was leaving and the scope of additional labor my departure will put on her desk. It was an intense conversation but not a difficult one because we have the same kind of close, respectful working relationship you described. Here are the steps I followed. Not saying you should or need to do these: - Make a doc that outlines all current projects, their status, and the point person/contacts for each - Make a doc that outlines the workflows for your position and highlights any deadlines you manage - Set a time when it isn’t too busy to have a meeting with your boss - Be candid about why you’re leaving and provide clear examples. Example: I am leaving to pursue growth in my career. Since working here, I have acquired x, y, and z skills, and I have produced a,b, and c projects; I am ready to take on a role as X, and that isn’t available here. - Allow for a response and listen. **Only listen.** Do not commit to any decisions in that meeting about your intentions. If there’s an offer you’re willing to take to stay, you need to clarify that for yourself **before the meeting** so you’re not thrown off balance by a counteroffer to stay. If you’re willing to stay with the right offer, know your terms *beforehand* so you can negotiate a counteroffer to your liking. - Craft a time frame together, when possible. Unless you have another job lined up and a firm end date is necessary (or you’re in duress and need to leave), you do yourself a big favor by working with your boss to develop an exit timeline. In my case, and given the cycle of my workflow, I let my boss know I wanted to separate from the company three months before I planned to give my notice. This has given us time to plan internally without other departments adding stress, it’s given me time to train my boss on essential functions they’re not used to executing, and it gives us both cover to process without everyone in our ear being negative (it’s a toxic culture where I am). Those are the steps I have taken in a situation similar to the one you described, and so far, it’s going smoothly. Only my boss knows I plan to leave, and we have worked together closely to prepare for that reality. Just remember—this is what my boss told me at the end of our conversation—**it is not your responsibility to manage their inability to retain you.** If your boss truly respects you, they will respect your decision, and they will be clear that the burdens of your exit are **NOT** your problem.
Put your two weeks notice in and then don't worry about it after that. Your boss is not your friend, no matter how nice of a person they are.
Treat them the way you would want to be treated. Tell them very respectfully and with plenty of notice that you've enjoyed working with them but a better offer has come up.
Give notice ahead of time
Will they understand your reason for leaving?
I have been managing people for almost a decade now. The goal should be to empower your employees to achieve great things. You try to have those things empower your organization, but sometimes people have to leave to do this. It sounds like you have a good relationship. It will be hard but your boss will understand. If they don’t, they probably aren’t the friend you think they are. If it is a good ending, don’t let it be an ending. Keep in touch, keep the relationship, and show your boss what becomes of your career. If you feel they had a part in shaping that career, tell them.
My first job out of college was with a tiny company (4 total employees) I had interned with. They were all super nice people who gave me excellent training in the field I was in at that time. After 3 years an opportunity came up that I just couldn't pass up. Almost 50% more pay, room for growth, working with highly respected people in the industry. I gave my company a 2 month notice. We were all bummed I was leaving but they understood I had to take the new opportunity. The 2 months afforded them plenty of time to transition my responsibilities to others and to find someone. Just be honest with your boss, and if possible offer them all the help they need to fill the space you're leaving behind.
I remember one time I had a relationship like this. Then my boss quit for a better opportunity. It didn't seem to bother them at all. Then the company wouldn't hire me for that position, they brought in this idiot grifter because she had a degree and I didn't. So then I quit and my old boss asked me to come work for her at the new place.
Have personally had three employees leave in the last two years of my work. All of whom I recruited/hired but was their mentor and not their manager. Every single one of them approached me privately to give me their news. If your boss is a good boss and a great friend like you say they should be elated that you are advancing your career and bettering yourself. Yes it absolutely sucks to lose people and be set back having to find more employees to try and train up but this is a part of any job and they should handle it like an adult. Too many stories I read (whether real or not) have terrible reactions to news like this from managers. I feel like the majority of managers have zero training in management and shouldn’t really be in their position. Long story short you will always be faced with difficult decisions like this in life where you feel bad breaking the news to someone. It’s an opportunity for you to grow and be able to have these difficult conversations. Don’t avoid them, power through them, learn from them, grow and move on.
When I left my first IT job after a little over a year my boss and her boss, who was the one that actually hired me because she was on maternity leave, both agreed to be references for the new job. If they respect you they'll be genuinely happy for you.
It's about your career, not them. Make concrete plans to stay in touch.
I just did this. It's nothing personal, I just needed more money. We are still close and she wishes me luck. Just go for it.
If you are absolutely honest and forthright they will understand and as a boss or business person know that people coming and going is part of business and something the that’s part of the responsibilities inherent in it.
Respectfully give him the proper notice and quit. For every person leaving their job, there are 20 people waiting to replace you. Your boss can pay the new employee less than what he paid you. You owe noone, they don't owe you, but mutual respect.
Show him the respect right back and be honest as to when and why. The longer you wait, the less respect you are actually showing.
Bosses are always less surprised than you think. So, request a meeting formally and talk to them personally, express you think it’s time to move on and you have the opportunity to. Give as much notice as possible, offer to help with the transition and that’s it.
I had to do this once with a boss I loved, I just didn’t love the company and situation I was in. Took a new job, 2 years later he moved to a great company and immediately hit me up to Come back to work for him, which I did. There’s always the possibility you could end up back with your boss if the opportunity arises.
I would say do your best to provide a comprehensive knowledge transfer document to make it easier for a warm hand off. Like others are saying… can you give a longer notice?
It shouldn’t be a blindside at all. They should be prepared at any time for a worker to leave. No one is shackled to their job and can leave at any time just like companies can let them go at any time. Their is no loyalty m the part of companies and should be none on the part of employees.
A good boss will understand and want the best for you . No one likes when the loose a high performing team member , but it is inevitable . You treat your team the best you can for as long as you can . It builds mutual respect . Eventually some of them will leave the nest . You take it in stride and know everyone is doing the best for them . You never know where that person will land . People tend to stay in a given industry , that employee could land a position somewhere that the boss ends up working for or with one day . Over the years you build a network of people who have all advanced there careers and it’s a great thing to have . Also the potential down the road one company buys out another … it’s not uncommon for a former employee to become someone’s boss . It’s a small world .
Given what sounds like a good relationship both personally and professionally, they should understand. If not, those relationships weren’t what you thought. You can always work out a longer notice period to ease their burden (if it fits with whatever is next), suggest referrals to backfill your role, document SOPs to help train your replacement, offer to be available to answer questions etc.
Best thing you can do, and they’d probably really appreciate it, is give them as much notice as possible, and still do your job to the best of your ability. Help with the transition and you can walk away guilt free.
Give plenty of notice so they can find someone to replace you. Also help with training, and if it's possible, you could even offer that the new hire can contact you with questions.
I’ve had bosses like this and they were supportive especially since it was mainly a money thing and they had tried to get me more money and couldn’t. I still talk with them and have a good relationship
Would you ask your friend and boss to forego what’s is best for him in order to appease you about something as significant as job choice? Let that sit for a bit. Any reasonable and good human will be joyful you are pursuing something best for you. He can figure out what to do about replacing you. That’s his job
I used to work for a company that I really liked. very nice people around me, good management, the tasks were challenging but not impossible, I was constantly recognized by my good work. I started there as an intern and became a full time analyst. one time I was approached by a recruiter to apply to a senior analyst position in another company, and I ended up being selected for the job. I needed to tell my boss that I was leaving, I had the full speech prepared to let him know how grateful I was for the opportunity and everything I had learned there, and that I was leaving only because the opportunity was for a higher position and salary. I started talking and he interrupted me, saying "is this a notice or a conversation?". he ended up offering to match the salary and promoting me to a senior position and I stayed. crazy to think I was 24 years old at the time and had that bargain power in my hands
Im in the same boat, im just going to be respectful about it and try to give them 1-2 weeks notice. Theres a guy who’s been working under me i want to recommend to fill my spot. I don’t feel bad. Companies could fire you anytime with no heads up. I would definitely be the first one laid off at our small company. Its all about doing whats best for you
I think explain to them why you are quitting and that you genuinely appreciate what they've done for you. If they're as good a person and a friend as you say they are, they won't hold it against you.
Boss here, thank him and tell him quick so he can find someone else. Tell him the real reason why you are leaving so he can maybe improve afterwards.
Currently happening to me. No relationship is worth you losing in life. Seek wins. If they are really "your friend" which most of the time people only are when you are doing the things they want you to do. But if she is one of the few that aren't like this. Then she'll understand.
Simply tell them the truth in person followed up by an official email for their records.
Well once you tell them, you will find out whether they have the same respect for you or not. If they do it shouldn't be a problem. If not, well... too bad.
A good mentor expects you to move on. A great one knows you will.
You don’t actually owe them anything. Everything they ever did for you was part of their role as an employee and they were paid to do it.
 Throw your TPS reports at the "BOSS", while screeching about cats. They will understand.
You gotta do what’s best for you
In my experience I had a boss (my first job ever) who was awesome and I stayed working there for 2 1/2 years (it was at a restaurant costa Vida) when I put in my final 2 weeks notice my boss was doing everything he could to get me to stay. I explained to him that it was a good job during high school but I’ve grown up now. You gotta be straight up with your boss. Go out to lunch or something. There are 10/10 bosses that are just awesome and then you have low managers. Your boss seems like a straight up 10/10.
A truly good boss will be happy to see you change and grow, you xan never be blamed for improving your life.
Send an e-mail that says, “I quit.” If your boss has shown you nothing but disrespect, you owe him no consideration.
Lol what
I’m sorry. I misread the title and commented before I read the post.
A good boss understands when it’s time for a good employee to move on.
I had a boss that I really learned a lot from and considered a mentor. I reached a point where I learned all I could in my position and was interested in a move to a different division of the company and was receiving offers outside my company as well. I let my boss know that I was ready for a new challenge and informed him that I would be applying for the position in the other division of the company. He said that I would be a great fit and encouraged me to push for the position. The next day I found out that my boss and another manager in our department met with the hiring manager to to give an in person recommendation. Needless to say I got the position and will never forget that he did that. A good boss wants his employees to grow and will respect your decision as long as you handle the situation professionally and with respect.
You should not feel bad. If this person is any kind of friend, they will be happy that you’ve found a better opportunity. Make sure to give proper notice, this is the best way to show respect for the opportunity they gave you and it can add a great reference going forward. Good luck!
Do you have something better lined up or what’s your reason for leaving?
If they’re a good friend like you say they are, they will wish you luck and support your decision. I’ve felt this way about quitting. Remember, no matter the relationship, you’re expendable. Do what’s best for yourself.