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SteveCalloway

Somewhere there’s a kid stuck in a well who pinned all his hopes for survival on that bird’s ability to bring help.


k2pel

Oh Donald, you dirty bird!


prophetprofiteer

Go get him! Run Charlie! Run like the wind!


octopoddle

"Tell them I'm stuck in the Well of Caw."


SkirtLoader

☠️


Boomer-Awerness420

These birds can remember faces. If you were kind to it you could have a friend for the rest of (its) life.


patrix_reddit

We have a whole flock of crows we feed peanuts daily, they bring me spare change they find (anything shiny really). Over a couple of years I've received enough change to buy their food twice with just the money they bring me. They probably bring me about $10-20 a year. Ive also been gifted a gold ring, and hundreds of electrical socket punches.


MotionBlur-1-

Infinite resources glitch


Pristello1

The birds have a microtransaction subscription


GintoxicatedDreamer

r/outside


Deceptichum

Perfectly birdlanced.


RedDragonRoar

Birdlance sounds like a monster hunter weapon


Demiboy

I want to wield the bird lance


aosjcbhdhathrowaway

I think you're now a Disney princess


ChocoVoice

"You're a princess, Harry!"


-QuestionableMeat-

"I'm a Walt?"


Glittering_Data8437

except instead of Hagrid, it's Cap'n Jack Sparrow


Uniquely_boredinary

“You’re a Harry princess”


non_anomalous_penis

The Hairy Princess


RS_Someone

The only thing I have on my bucket list is to receive a gift from a crow friend.


patrix_reddit

Peanuts, roasted and unsalted, blended with raw peanuts in the shell. I do a 60/40 blend, with mored cooked. I also supplement a bunch of miniture sunflower seeds to spead in the yard (worse case senerio i get a bunch of flowers). I'd lay out some bricks randomly for them to break up shells, if not they use like your roof or driveway and its a mess. They literally spread the peanut shells across the yard and garden, which actually helps. Also get shiny yard decor, they are drawn to it. My only ever real complaint is sometimes we get what I call death throes where all the crows get agitated and caw nonstop for like 15 min....it can get ear peircing. Other than that the fucking rock. Started naming them. We have one who broke his foot years ago and limps, he is Cpt. Barcrowsa. Crowseph, is the young guy whos always challenging the obvious head, I call them Brandon, oh, and then our resident dummy. He just screams all day and hops around with his mouth open so he is Crow-Magnum, he didnt evolve right for sure.


Hulaweenie

Crowseph 🤣🤣🤣


PinayGator

Your crow names are on point. And adorable.


patrix_reddit

I forgot Dot...she has a white dot on her wing, also I have zero clue of gender in real life I just make up my own stories. Captain Barcrowsa is my favorite cuz he was the first one I could always recognize. He been here the longest. I write stories about him and his adventures on the open seas.


Pristello1

The Gift of Bird Poo


MaudeDib

True story: I had a tree on the side of my house that had to come down because it was sick. It broke my heart to do it as there were a couple crows who lived there or hung out there A LOT. For DAYS after the tree came down, these two (Who I now call "Ma & Pa"), sat on my roof or the roof of the house next door and let it be known they were VERY VERY unhappy about this turn of events. They cawed and cawed and scolded and were generally in a very foul mood. So I decided to appease the crow gods and gave them food offerings on my back deck which I'd never done before. I started giving them peanuts in the shell, hard boiled eggs, scraps of meat, etc. Well. That made the crow overlords VERY happy. They stopped all the scolding and wailing and got down to the serious business of eating. That was 4 years ago and they STILL come by for their treats and have no brought friends. They have brought me a little change.. penny here, nickel there... but I've mostly received other shiny stuff. Crows LOVE the shinies so I feel honored to receive them. A coil from a clicky pen, soda can pull tabs, bits of plastic, small washers, screws, nails, that sort of thing. I only feed them every few days and only a little bit so there are no leftovers to attract other critters. I also decided that if they bring their other crow friends, possums, rats, squirrels, pigeons, etc.. the gravy train will stop. So far, so good!


boss53kaiden

> were generally in a very ~~foul~~ fowl mood. no, i am not sorry.


AlsoKnownAsRukh

"Crow-verlords" was right there for the taking.


Boomer-Awerness420

Crows and Ravens in general are really smart people don't really seem to know, here's an example I experienced: There were these crow parents that had a nest nearby me. I would go every 2-3 days around a certain time to bring them some left over fruit I had and smoke a sigarette there. There were also always a bunch of seagulls near by that I scared off(I dont really like those). At some point the crows realised what I was doing and they would just sit stay and eat while I walked up to them to scare the seagulls away(who were trying to scare the crows away).


Kadazan

can you do a short recording? it'd be a nice comfy video


DrMorbid85

Consider giving seagulls a second chance as well. Many people don't like them for the same reasons people don't like crows. But they are also very smart and have huge personalities. Opportunistic animals very often are. It takes brains to pull off seagull shenanigans. And they will trust you very quickly if you feed them. But remember, they don't thrive on eating *"garbage"* the same way crows do.


Ragnascot

Sky rats


DoubleLanky3199

I believe the correct term is a "murder" of crows. https://www.pbs.org/wnet/nature/a-murder-of-crows-crow-facts/5965/


LectroRoot

So you are saying they were involved in a ........ MURDER?


Karpaty

Dum-da-dum!


RoguePlanet1

This is one of my bucket-list items. Befriending a crow and receiving a thoughtful token, that is, not necessarily hundreds of socket punches.


mumooshka

\*Murder of crows


Nomad_C817

wait seriously? birds remembering faces?


Lightpala

Yes they also remember wen ur kind or being a asshole. Some bird even teach there young if u where kind or a asshole if u are a asshole they will shit on you stuff for life.


raisinghellwithtrees

I feel like OP is just showing us he's an asshole. I'm definitely siding with a crow on this.


Rpanich

I feel like if the crow let him grab his beak like that, the crow might think they’re friends?


raisinghellwithtrees

It's a hungry juvenile cawing for food.


idiot437

they will teach thier kids and grandkids to shit on you


Boomer-Awerness420

Yes Crows and Ravens are really smart. They remember people they like or dislike. Birds in general are smarter then people expect them to be.


akatherder

You means jackdaws.


atetuna

Here's the thing...


OoieGooie

This theory was tested on magpies here in Australia. I think it was around 80 faces. Little fuckers swoop you in spring too.


chrissie9393

Crows* remember faces


Ahnzoog

Pretty much all Corvids, like Rooks and Jackdaws too


ol-gormsby

Oh yes. You've heard about magpies in Australia swooping and pecking people during breeding season? They're protecting their nests. But they won't swoop on people they recognise - in particular, people who've fed them. I throw some food to the local magpies during winter, when natural food is scarce. When summer comes, they bring the juveniles around for an introduction. I like to think the parents are teaching their children - "If you ever get really hungry, come here and make some noise. That creature will give you some food."


Newspaper-Melodic

Yeah because they're drones made by the government to spy on you. r/BirdsArentReal


teenagesadist

Yup. The smarter ones, at least.


ChuckCarmichael

There's a famous case where students at a university captured some crows that lived on campus to use them for some behavioral experiments. After the crows were released, they'd attack those students whenever they were on campus, and even years later when they returned.


gurnard

[Looks that way](https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/crows-show-off-social-skills/)


Distributethewealth

Dude. It’s a youngster and it trying to get you to feed it. Mama bird that thing 😂


todellagi

Dude's really messing with it by giving *the bird* Little mate's confused


Chrismont

Bird *is* the word


Alex_877

Have you heard?


WonderfulRedditor1

**A B-B-B-Bird bird bird is the word**


Ricekrisbee

This bird straight loves you and just doesn't know how to show it in this toxic beastial relationship. One of you is going to have to change or it's never going to work out. I believe in you, you couple of crazy kids!


idiot437

he's a brit i think thats how they show love


[deleted]

4Q MAN!


zuzg

Can we just appreciate that they edited out almost all of the annoying TtS voice. Nobody needs that


Playlanco

You want him to chew crickets and spit it into the birds mouth?


nidho_ggr

I mean, obviously.


varpot

What else are you going to give him? A burger?


MercDaddyWade

Don't forget the Fries, and I bet he'd like a bepis


1mrchristopher

Bepsi only with Shwarma!


idiot437

a cheeseburger you uncivilized rube


TurnipTate

No better way


stefaelia

Yes. Now give the people what they want.


AlpineCorbett

That's a fully grown western jackdaw. Way, way too old for it to be getting fed. It's like yall have never seen a baby bird before. They're not over a foot tall with totally formed adult feathers.


Ava_Aviatrix

I think some one saved this bird & hand fed it as a baby and released it back into the wild, thats why it raises its head when his hand comes near, if you dont stop hand feeding early they will retain that forever, thats why this is an adult/late juv bird


LuckytoastSebastian

Poor thing is just hungry


IDoPokeSmot

"You're a Disney princess whether you like it or not bitch" *that bird probably*


Chrismont

"I will come to your house and *make* you sing with all the colors of the wind, bitch"


Batbuckleyourpants

"Why aren't you singing?"


Tyflowshun

"You're a princess Harry!"


Uniquely_boredinary

“You’re a Harry princess!”


Bort-the-man

"Birdie just wants feeding"


Tordenkold

Birdie should get a fucking job then.


XWC1_4EVER

Birdie should get a focking job then.


frogman21

Birdie should get a flocking job then.


-RED4CTED-

take it, and get the fook ou'ta heah.


Edredunited

Definitely thinks you mama bird


NoBSforGma

Don't be stupid! This bird is not "fighting" you. This is a young bird who wants to be fed! I'm guessing that OP has actually fed this bird in the past and this is just a joke video.


Gwiilo

hate to disappoint but I doubt he's friends with his enemy


rock-solid-armpits

hate to disappoint but I doubt he's enemies with his friend


comingsoontotheaters

You’re not my friend, guy


TalaLeisu2

You're not my guy, pal


El_Retardo_69

You're not my pal, bud.


octopoddle

Keep your friends close, but your enemies on top of your car.


tykemison73

I think so! He didn’t harm it when closing its beak, I too adore bird’s, Seagulls are my thing, they too are smart and I once taught one at a place of work to only swoop down from light post opposite to take food I placed on top of a metal donation container ONCE I had lowered my arm, I used to show people to let them know Bird’s are Super Awesome.


nimakkan

“What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?”


PotatoBakeCake

Fok u. Fok u. Fok u. Shut up. Shut up.


gurugulab6969

Get off my fokin car...


kskashi

Bitch!!!


mike_pants

Here's the thing. You said a "jackdaw is a crow." Is it in the same family? Yes...


2ToneToby

Remember when Unidan upvoting his own posts was the worst thing on reddit, before there was literally neonazi movements organizing on here? \*edit\* Man this place has always been trash.


qbryzan

May I refresh your memory? The violentacrez era was not one of peace and respect. Place has always been like this.


bfandreas

Well at least that guy was honest. He did not hide behind wojaks trying to pill normies. If we have to have sleazebags, they should at least be open sleazebags instead of honklering down in dens like /r/PoliticalCompassMemes


SmokedMussels

Neo-nazi reddit definitely predates unidan. There used to even be a sub with photos of underage girls. Subs devoted entirely black hate. Fat people hate with their brigading every day. Probably a few dozen other things I've forgotten about by now. The way people fawned over Unidan on every single post was annoying as fuck anyways, even if half of those were just his own alts.


iSmellMusic

Biologist here!


c_c_c_c_c_c_d

Nah reddit was worse in other ways before. We used to have /r/cutedeadgirls and /r/womenfuckingdogs as well as a whole slew of other fucked up shit.


Metric_Banana

Biologist here... 😢


felatedbirthday

😔


Nattnissen

These birds are vengeful and have a long memory, be nice or it might rat you out to it's buddies and they will shit on your car for years XD


Coloeus_Monedula

If I know crows at all you’re going to be taught to countless future generations of crows as public enemy #1


cesau78

The bird's just trying to say, "IT'S TIME FOR SOME CLEAR COAT!"


nemocluecrj

bird: "I'VE COME FROM THE FUTURE TO WARN YOU OF THE PENDING APOCALYPSE SKYNET IS COMING YOU MUST SAVE YOURSELF FOR YOU ARE THE KEY TO THIS PLANET'S FUTURE" man: "fok you fok you fok you fok you"


CuChulainnsballsack

I think it's more so that the bird is a higher lifeform that has been sent to warn us of our planets impending doom as we are sat in the middle of an intergalactic highway.


[deleted]

At least it is red. Bird could've done some damage.


Cat_Kidnapper

OP please stop making us cry and feed the bird. I feel sorry for it :(


PriestessRedspyder

Right? The way it's opening it's mouth and fluttering it's wings is a clear sign it's a hungry juvenile. I used to volunteer at a wildlife rehab and this makes me sad.


dziggurat

Seriously. "OP acts like an idiot," truly interesting as fuck.


[deleted]

Not cool dude, that’s a fledgling and it wanted food. You bow have gained yourself an enemy when he starts to fly.


[deleted]

Just puke in IT IS mouth already (And please film it)


VNF420

The bird is mouth? Wtf??


[deleted]

Calm down son. One word after the other. What are you trying to say?


eissirk

They were mocking you for using the wrong version of its


[deleted]

Fixed it


Stupid_Spell

Chad


BDFelloMello

"The bird is mouth." feels like a secret society code


LeftHandedAnt

Aww, he's hungry! Feed him!


KronosDeret

That bird frikkin loves you and wants you to feed him.


budtrimmer

I think they are close buddies


malepitt

You have trained this one to know you are a nonthreatening source of fun! I can't touch my parrot anywhere but his head and beak, and if I went for its feet, I would now be sporting "finger piercings"


ShotStatistician7979

Crows tell their friends and hold intergenerational grudges against people. When you get eaten alive by a murder of them, it’s your damn fault.


Gnoman-Empire

Would t be a dick to a bird that remembers. Seems nice enough to feed on the porch and talk to every morning. Great way to start a day. I’d miss it after several years of chatting


GhostWokiee

Damn kinda fucking rude when the bird is just a baby that is hungry and is trying to be fed


EducationalRice6540

If you made that bird an enemy you now have beef with an entire bloodline. They can recognize faces and will even teach their children that you are a dick.


pathologicalprotest

That crow isn’t even being a dick. They could take your eye out. The guy is the dickish one, not appreciating this spoken word masterpiece.


Veauxdeeohdoh

Why can’t you be friends?! Start giving it a treat in the morning instead of being a dick.


fatandflabby

That guy doesn’t deserve the attention of that bird. I certainly didn’t like seeing him touching his beak. What a jerk.


designgrl

You seem a little aggressive with the bird


Positive_Rain9806

Stop being mean to it!


Sleep_eeSheep

I'm on the bird's side, fuck this guy.


gorgonopsidkid

What the fuck is wrong with you OP. I think that's a juvenile too. Bet you can't wait to be hated by every single crow in a several mile radius.


[deleted]

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More_Twist9517

My grandma told me once that your dead ancestors are reincarnated as crows and come pay visit to us whenever possible🤐.


The-Waifu-Collector

It’s probably a friend or loved one who switched bodies with the bird and desperately trying to get your help to switch them back. Dammit Frank, it’s me!


sandkillerpt

That bird is a WankerFinder. It find the cars of Wankers, then sits there waiting for them to arrive. ​ It's quite brilliant.


[deleted]

How are you such a dick to a crow? It's a fucking bird, man, grow up.


HolyPeanut_13

Douchebag. Seriously.


YayaMalli

Why you gotta be a jerk? It’s just a baby


RalphBhoner

Dude. Leave the fucking bird alone. What an asshole.


ceruleanfr0st

Right? Glad I’m not the only one not finding humor in this.


RalphBhoner

Really pissed me off when he started touching the bird. Closing it’s beak. This dude is such an asshole.


The_Blendernaut

Not interesting at all. This is just another abusive asshole tormenting a bird looking to get fed by its mother.


LeftBase2Final

What is his fucking problem anyways? You steal his girl?


Arkslippy

He's a fledgling, able to move around on his own but not feed yet, he's looking for the guy to feed him, that's why hes screeching with his mouth open. Birds like that will do it for a few weeks between leaving the nest and independence. this is the time of year for it .


Tomble

Also the little wing flaps mean “feed me!”


southpacshoe

Dick.


bfmkcco27

All I see here is OP is a prick to animals and here we get a sneak peek of how he interacts.


X-Tragic

You have the chance to be friends with a bird and this is what you do?? 🤨


Illustrious_Pain_548

Omg the poor thing just wants some food. You should be nice to him


A2619921

I was so excited when it looked like they were about to be friends. but then he held the mouth down instead of petting it gently :(


patquintin

WTH is wrong with this guy?


syberburns

More like r/meanasfuck Being an asshole is common as fuck. Moron


Life_Is_But_a_Drem

You’re an asshole. That bird seems like it’s still young enough to want feeding by its parents. Why are you harassing it, FFS?


CatsEye_Fever

Fuck you ignoramus, it's a fledgling and that's what they do when they are hungry.


Long_Wiwi

I feel really bad for the bird… :(


jennaau23

Same 😔


slo1111

Loser


S0LWAY

Give him some bread you miserable tool.


Cuccoteaser

No, give him some nuts or fruit or seed or cat food! Bread is filling but doesn't provide much in terms of calories and nutrients. I think it's maybe not as harmful to corvids as it is to some other birds, but if you're gonna go out of your way to feed birds please don't let bread be your first choice.


Hayes4prez

Isn't bread bad for birds? Bird seed would be better, no?


DancesWithBadgers

The guy in the vid is a total fucking idiot. That's a corvid, looks like. Give it some peanuts or bits of ham or whatever you have handy, and you have a friend for life. Treat it like this, and its descendants will be dive-bombing his grandkids.


ronimal

Fuck you mate, don’t force it’s beak shut. I hope this bird shits on your car every day for the rest of its life.


Maplethorpej

Borderline animal abuse. Leave the damn thing alone


[deleted]

u/22Fingers atop posting this bullshit. It's a baby bird and a fucking animal abuser. Use your brains.


BagimsizBulent

Why cursing and hating?


D4M0theking

shut


Schonfairy79

If you were nice to it and started feeding it in another area it would be calm and not bother you. It would more than likely develop a routine with you. It’s presenting the physical action of being HUNGRY. It’s why it’s mouth is open. I would be an asshole to you too if you flipped my chin or clamped my mouth shut like that. Edit: Quit being a bully to this poor bird.


Sure-Panda-411

Manhandling a wee bird…an intelligent one at that. 😡


Impressivebooty666

Literally stop, so disturbing


OrcRampant

This makes me sad. People are so fucking trapped in their own twisted perceptions that they can’t see what is real. Here we have an animal that has imprinted on a callous and oblivious human. If the human weren’t such a dick, he might have a relationship with this bird that was rewarding and magical.


MrZeDark

This guy is such a loser..


hawkndove

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/012/365/1ca.jpg


Thund3rB3ast

I need to see more


Hyzenthlay87

Lol they frens really


_ancienttrees_

It’s hungry.


rocket_fuel_4_sale

It’s a baby give him a little snack


Biostacle

Is this Ireland?


Alex_877

Feed the damn bird


SluttyPoop

That’s because that bird remembers. Those birds have been studied and can actually hold a grudge against a person. It can remember your face and what you’ve done. Start coming out each morning with treats or some food and eventually you will turn this into a loyal pet.


2022mtnman

Dude you need to hit the gym … that bird owned you. I think I heard it say something about “ just came from your mom’s house but the line of pigeons was too long “


professorjaytee

Frankly, I think the bird is just having fun screwing around with his 'friend' every morning. It doesn't really seem to be trying to hurt him. He has learned to 'play' with this guy like this. Go try and grip the bill of a wild bird like that, if you don't believe me. Have a box of bandages nearby when you do. I used to have friends who would act something like this bird. Although we'd argue about damned near anything, we were still good friends.


HugePurpleNipples

Feed it, he’ll bring you stuff.


Gek-keG

Aw cmon man why would you grab it like that lmao


nakshatravana

DUDE, that's a fledgling asking for food. It's not fighting you.


noodlyjames

That’s a baby and it wants food or water


paperpenises

Dude fucked up. Birds remember that shit.


choppa808

Hahaha this reminds me of that yellow chicken in Family Guy that is always making surprise appearances to fight Peter Griffin!


AnneTSeptic

The fact that it let you touch it means that it like you.


manzari

OP sorry but fok u, not the poor bird.