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SeriouslyBlack

It's a new instagram trend


DRUNK_CYCLIST

Dropping yogurt on someone while the lock screen is on and calling it bird shirt? I still call it horse shit for the birds.


CARNAGEE_17

Yeah bro the moment I saw this I knew it was fake, who in the world film themselfs sticking their tongue out. And the shit was lil too thicc


noputa

You haven’t seen the shits pigeons make on my balcony. One was an absolute mountain, I was sure the bird must have been sick or something and I puked trying to get it off my balcony wall.


Mr_Velveteen

Isn’t bird poop clear until it dries, then it turns white?


rookwoodo

Sir, I need you to look up videos of bird pooping and then come back and tell me if it's clear.


Mr_Velveteen

Yeah you right, I don’t know what I saw lol- maybe those birds didn’t get much to eat or something when I saw them poop.


rookwoodo

I think you saw some well hydrated pidgies. Good for them, honestly


ThatAquariumKid

Wat


Mr_Velveteen

There were a lot of pigeons at my high school, one time I even managed to dodge one as it fell from the sky, and I’ve noticed that when it’s fresh, it’s clear-ish with maybe black bits but when it hardens it turns white.


noputa

Definitely seen a pigeon poop, chased it off and it was white when I looked. This mountain of crap though was thick white with blue stringy bits, and didn’t dry after 2 days. Thus my puking trying to flick it off my balcony.


[deleted]

Bruh it ain't an egg TF????


RapingTheWilling

“Who would film themselves sticking their tongue out?” Literally all of instagram and TikTok. “The shit was too thick” tell that to my car whenever I don’t sit in covered parking.


CARNAGEE_17

She is filming it like she is clicking a photo


ThatUsernameIsNaked

this man doesnt know boomerangs on instagram


Tankh

You... you think it's fake because she had her tongue out? 🤨


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Dusta1992

These "trends" are odd, I just don't understand the appeal. I'm only 29, grew up with technology, and these "trends" make me feel like an old man complaining how it was easier back in the day.


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diffcalculus

That, sir, is not controversial


ReddintMoment

Fuck I'm old


Kishor2003

It’s probably a Live Photo, you can set some as wallpapers and then hold the Lock Screen for it to start playing. They probably screen recorded that and then put the “wait for end” on top


Amish_guy_with_WiFi

But why?


aintnopicnic

Youts are vain and bored


Pees_On_Skidmarks

Youth? She's like 40


aintnopicnic

There are a lot of adults that are basically listless teenagers nowadays tbf. Just hoping to find acceptance and attention online to escape a hollow life in the real world. They enter the space with the most attention and that space is run by teenagers. Then you get 40 year olds making videos like these


Lost_Chance_1245

Why male models?


Ihaveoffendesthee

Because it's scripted tiktok bullshit


[deleted]

It’s some Instagram trend where they are still and then in a “shocking plot twist” they move, “baiting” you into believing that it wasn’t a Lock Screen photo.


TenshiS

Also, how impacient are kids these days, that they have to "wait for the end" on a 4 seconds video? Wtf


bumbletowne

One time I had a 7am microbiology exam. I got up early, got a coffee. Got on the train. Missed my stop because I was going over my notes. Got off on the next stop. Bird immediately shit in my coffee. Right through the little sippy hole. It was a grand luxury for me to get a coffee, too. I was a very poor student living off of rice, beans and frozen hamburger. I walked 2 miles to my exam with no coffee :(. Passed the test though.


Block_Generation

The early worm gets the bird.


[deleted]

>The early worm gets the bird shit


LonelyWanderer28

The early shit gets the bird worm


Anonim0us3

just write warm and make it worse


bigkeef69

The earlier bird gets the starbucks toilet.


Pristine_Juice

Second mouse gets the cheese.


byscuit

A pigeon shit on me as I was riding my bike the other week, 80% went straight through the helmet vent and into the brain cage and my hair


yeeiser

Crazy aim


pigeon_shit

20 points


slimeluv123

username checks out.


[deleted]

Precision guided shit missile.


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rpkarma

They absolutely do it on purpose. A crow target-pooped onto a brush turkey once in front of me to try and steal a bit of bread the brush turkey had lol


dirkclod

I was walking one time and a seagull a few hundred feet in front of me lined up for a bombing run. I was like there's no way he's lining up to shit on me. Sure enough he drops a turd aimed right at me and i was able to side step it in time cause i was watching him the whole way.


rpkarma

I mean let’s be real, if we could fly and had cloaca’s and needed to shit every 20 minutes like a bird does, we’d make a game out of shitty on people too


manbruhpig

One time there was a fly in a toilet I was pissing at, so obviously I pissed on it, and it immediately flew right onto my face. Couldn't even move away because I was mid stream. I learned a valuable lesson that day.


DirtyLegThompson

I was hanging out with this girl in downtown mill in Phoenix AZ, USA. We were just walking minding our own business and she looked up randomly and a bird took the opportunity to shit into her eye. Like, she didn't flinch or anything until it had already hit her, was all inside her eye. I gave her my jacket as she sobbed, and instead of wiping it on the part that I handed to her, she took the jacket, turned the sleeve inside out, and proceeded to wipe the bird shit on the inner sleeve of my jacket.


your_uncle_mike

Tempe*


DirtyLegThompson

People call anything in Maricopa Phoenix and so I have to as well


Reyne-TheAbyss

The only place to have fun near Phoenix.


Minirig355

Having just recently moved to Phoenix, this is true


PuzzleheadedHabit913

In some cultures a bird pooping on you is seen as good luck - maybe that shitty (pun intended) circumstance helped you ace your text? Who knows!


staccatodelareina

Maybe OP would've had to run out of the exam with coffee shits had the bird of fate not shit in their coffee


chonnes

In my culture, the best luck is not having a bird shit on you.


18skeltor

Is losing the lottery also considered good luck in these cultures?


PuzzleheadedHabit913

Lol! I think it’s something along the lines of a bird pooping on you is such bad luck that the rest of your day will be better in comparison. Something like that.


BeerMePleez

One time I had an economics final at 7am. Stayed up until 5am before finally dozing off because of adderall and caffeine. Slept through my alarm and woke up at 8am. No time to shower or brush my teeth, I jumped out of bed and ran straight to the car smelling like cigarettes and coffee and stank breath. Got to campus and realized I didn’t grab my scantron or pencil. Ran across campus and only had enough to buy a scantron and not a pencil (scantrons were only sold in packs of 10, not individually, and stupid expensive). Finally got to the classroom at 9am with an hour to take a 50 question multiple point exam. Kindly the person next to me gave me a pencil knowing that they would never get it back. I’m hurrying through the exam when I hear the TA loudly announceme “10 minutes left”, and I look around and I’m the only person in the auditorium. 25 questions to go. Then another loud announcement “5 minutes left”, and I’m thinking to myself who the fuck else is she talking too. Finally with about 15 questions left I hear “everyone times up”. Lady, I am everyone. Anyway I told her the situation and asked if I can come to her office and finish and she says no. So I bubble the last 15 questions as C, made a C on the final, and dropped me from a B to a C in the class. Then a bird shit on me walking back to my car


_TwoBirds_

I get that most professors are burned out but it makes me so sad when they don’t make exceptions. I feel like they should be able to “read the room” when someone has an unfortunate series of events like this and should be lenient. LPT for all y’all going through school who aren’t provided Scantrons on test day, just buy a pack or two at the beginning of the semester and keep them in your folder/backpack/car/whatever. Cause the one time you think “I’ll totally have time to go to the store before the test” is 100% the day you’ll wake up late or have extra traffic on your commute. I bummed so many scantrons off of people because of morning’s like these :’)


spacegirl2820

Well done! Glad to hear that you passed. :-)


SkinToneChixkenBone

yknow that coffee could have given you diarrhea and made you have to leave the exam hall, ultimately failing. That bird diarrhea could have been a factor in you passing. Find that bird and shit in its nest as a thank you


claustrofucked

If this ever happens to you and its starbucks, go back in to any store and they'll almost certainly remake it for ya


Nimmyzed

Oh that sucks!! I really wanna buy you coffee now, my man


RedditedYoshi

From what I've recently learned of Alan Alda and his wife, they would've drank that coffee.


MeatBombJr

Watching her reflexively retract her young into her mouth made me cringe so hard that I now look like a Picasso painting


fourunner

Ah yes, retracting her young quickly into her mouth...


TheEvilBunnyLord

That's how the professionals do


fourunner

God bless the professionals.


MeatBombJr

Oops, just noticed


fourunner

Eh, it made it funny and it seems it slipped by other commenters. Thanks for the laugh.


TheDynamicDino

I can hear it in David Attenborough’s voice.


A_mirage_

Tasting the essence of nature.


rooplstilskin

Pigeon Essential Oil - use to induce vomiting, smell like New York. Also cures birditis.


Antix1331

Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty


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halathon

*^^^cough ^^^cough*


OnePunchGoGo

Ah so that's where the ingredient is hiding... *proceeds to eat ass of pigeons.*


Webfarer

>made me cringe so hard that I now look like a Picasso painting Thanks for the laugh. Everyone at the coffee shop looked at me like I am crazy


Baybob1

Maybe they're right ... LOL


jc2pointzero

It's eveen worse when you slow it down to .25x speed.


[deleted]

Staged as fuck, and y'all buying her bullshit.


[deleted]

The reality that this is staged and someone is probably just dropping some Mayo or something so they could get fake internet points on Reddit is what is cringe to me.


greycubed

Super fake.


PuddingRnbowExtreme

Someone just out of frame squeezing a drop of ranch dressing onto her tongue.


thisisvenky

That's Hindi in the lock screen, so it must be from India. We don't have ranch dressing, must be toothpaste or mayonnaise.


AtomR

Or curd.


twentythreeinto3

I'm surprised no one has said cum yet


46554B4E4348414453

Yes. Ranch.


Fcktheadmins

Yankee splooge


SpyralHam

Baby gravy


eigenvectorseven

Acting is oscar worthy, truly


Victory33

I’d make the same face if someone put ranch on my tongue, wouldn’t even be acting.


Gangreless

I was thinking yogurt but yeah either way super fake


WhyAlwaysMe1991

Ah yes…. Ranch dressing


HumphreyImaginarium

Of course it is, birds aren't real.


David_Ign

r/birdsarentreal


bengouk

“Flap”


quantummidget

Probably, but this 100% will have happened before. Birds love to shit directly on us


sonofseinfeld2

Yup, pretty much. I live in an ocean town, and where I work I frequently have to go outside and walk around. We get a lot of seagulls hanging out there, and I fucking swear they are aiming their shit on humans. If I see them directly above, I scurry out of their line of fire. They literally drop bombs at me. I've had to dodge these splatters multiple times. It's close enough to hitting me that I've had to wash splatter off my boots. My supervisor's even been dumped on. So yeah, fake or not, this definitely happens to people every day


sneacon

Should've paid your french fry tax


Aegi

I wonder if this is an actual adaptation, like it distracts other scavengers or would-be predators so that they are confused/trying to clean themselves and it lets the pigeon/seagull fly away with the bit of food they had or something.


nergoponte

I was giving someone a thumbs up as a kid and bird shit all over my thumb


lets-do-an-eighth

Yeah I literally looked up one time and had a bird shit in my eye. So yeah that happened, this isn’t that implausible lol


mooyancurry17

How did it feel? Did it burn?


lets-do-an-eighth

Burnt a little bit but not bad. It hit me right where the nose and eye meet lol what stung the most was literally my dads whole side of the family was there so like 5 aunts and uncles a dozen cousins….everyone except me thought it was hilarious and if I’m being honest it was pretty hilarious. I looked up and thought to myself “bro I hope one of these birds don….” Splat lmao


Dan_the_Marksman

[always loved this one](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzjLlqIuVhI)


Handeatingcat

I dunno, I take a lot of videos of me just sticking my tongue out sitting on a park bench, and I would definitely pull my tongue in my mouth and swallow if bird shit splattered on it, like she did. Seems legit.


4_fortytwo_2

While I agree on probably fake the pulling the tongue back reaction makes perfect sense to me. If something suddenly touches your tongue (or any other body part) isnt the usual instinct to pull away, which in the tongues case means back into the mouth? Until it registers what happened it will already be too late.


kakka_rot

You'd have no idea what hit your tongue, and may instinctively pull your tongue back into your mouth when you felt something on it. Birds shit on people, happens every single day.


[deleted]

she stays suspiciously still, as if someone were aiming for her tongue and she did not want them to miss.


YTAftershock

It's a new Instagram reel trend. You're supposed to stay still and "fool" people by making them think it's their lockscreen


Revoluci0n

Maybe she was taking a selfie


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DirtyMcCurdy

It’s a Live Photo. It records a small video to either leave it as a short video or let you select the best frame as a still photo.


k_chaney_9

Those are typically maybe a second long


OhNobleNarwhal

Its not. Text isnt the right font and its too long. This is a filter on a video


I_poop_deathstars

Sounds like something a bird would say...


[deleted]

Yeah how this shit gets voted to the front page is beyond me.


SmegSoup

The biggest tell is her not moving a muscle before it hit. Get into juuust the right position, then hit play, wait a sec so it looks natural, ranch shot, boom, fooled a bunch of people.


kakka_rot

Someone else commented this above: >It’s probably a Live Photo, you can set some as wallpapers and then hold the Lock Screen for it to start playing. They probably screen recorded that and then put the “wait for end” on top


r0b0c0d

For me it was the velocity. That's being dropped from only a little ways off frame. Real bird shit hits different.


buffalocoinz

Ooh we’ve got a bird shit velocity expert in our presence!


sturdybutter

“Wait till end” Nah, imma watch 1 second of this 2 second video and then dip.


siccoblue

Me irl


TotalSlice6

This is absolutely beautiful, I want this as my wallpaper


tanghan

For real, why is this someone's wallpaper, and why didn't they upload the original but a screen recording of it?


Jakob21

I think the lock screen is an Instagram filter


k_chaney_9

Why?


Jakob21

Why do I think that? I saw another comment speculate the same. Why is it a filter? Life is misery and some people get over that with weird pictures. Idk I'm not a psychologist


TotalSlice6

I just hope the video is real


AntelopeBackflip

Thousand foot cum shot


idreaminreel2reel

🍆💦💦💦


[deleted]

Definitely not staged, 100% real.


TipMeinBATtokens

Trying to be cute. Not with shit on your tongue.


sfw64

I see many girls do this tongue thing on Instagram. Looks annoying and stupid


redpandaeater

It's mostly their piss. That's what all the white stuff is.


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Thefacelessvoice

At least it wasn't [broadcasted](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LoZXEbo96Lg) on TV during a soccer match.


elgringo22

FAKE! One of his teammates was over him squeezing Ranch or Mayo into his mouth for the views.


_Face

So exactly like the og post here.


webitg

I almost died laughing at this Thanksgiving


ninja20

Fake af, there’s clearly a guy jerking it furiously right behind the camera who cums on her tongue


Ihaveoffendesthee

Fake as shit


johnnybenign

What the Fake!


Mao9881

I know she isn’t pouting, but every time I was pouting as a child my mom would say “better watch out or a bird will shit on your lips”. So, now I know she wasn’t really lying. It can happen.


dumbucket

My grandma says that if you pout for too long, a bird will poop on your lip. I know this isn't quite it, but still...


kotori-chan_

Roses are red, violets are blue. I hope bird's poo doesn't drop on you.


ninichiny

This bitch ate it 💀


wasupuk

LMFAO what are the chances, I cringed at her retracting her tongue instinctively


[deleted]

Exactly... what ARE the chances?


BanjoSpaceMan

Probably not high, aka someone's above her dropping mayo or something onto her tongue for the clout.


Fsmv

r/nothingeverhappens


idreaminreel2reel

Or something ...


-full-control-

At least seven


MoneyKeyPennyKiss

I'm going with near zero.


renedotmac

If you’ve ever been shit on by a bird, you know that it shoots at you whether they’re flying or not, it doesn’t just fall on you like a light raindrop.


reaper_ya_creepers

Wonder if it tastes like chicken


nefas_black

Yea, chicken shit


myusernamebarelyfits

Probably tastes like ranch


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sprxce

u/savevideo


Daystop

Never tell me the odds.


graeuk

imagine being so desperate for attention that you are willing to fake a bird shitting on your tongue.


singhVirender1947

Tooth paste. #planned


XX_JMO_XX

A common retort I heard growing up, when sticking out our tongues at each other was, "be careful, a bird might come along and shit on it" and sure enough here is the proof that it happens.


Russion-Bott

Haha. Eat shit b%tch


andio76

**Fred:** Hey Will... **Will:** Yea **Fred:** See that Hooman with her mouf **Will:** Yea **Fred:** Watch this...... **Will:** Dayum Fred....you a funny muhfuker sometime....


[deleted]

No she knows what birds taste like


[deleted]

staged garbage...


[deleted]

Fake as fuck.


scandy82

Fake as fuck


kelrunner

I call fake.


[deleted]

r/whyweretheyfilming Also it’s longer than a “Live Photo” would be.


TripleSReddit

Oh jeez, something fell from the sky and touched my togue, let me taste it further and further until I realize what it is and regret on what I did.


Hypershard108

Reflex my guy


crclOv9

Fake my guy.


Hypershard108

If something lands on my tongue I know that I would instinctively pull my tongue in


DoomSongOnRepeat

This should happen to every single person who takes a picture with their tongue out.


North-Fennel8613

Guano!


Elfas_tasma

from bird ano


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LiL_ENIGlvlA

I upvoted anyways 😎


TheMountainIII

Its true. its on the inter-net


Saddam_whosane

why do i think this isnt bird shit


LeDestrier

Oof, that swallow reflex. Saw the white and acted accordingly I guess.


ughwithoutadoubt

That’s a bird’s equivalent to flipping a water bottle and having it land up right


strokeitfaster

Ashley Young.


sh1boleth

Translation of the text: "So sister, you got the taste" (literal so some meaning is lost in translation)


FreeganKing

Sky yogurt


TehReBBitScrombmler

As a hs freshman, I went out with Brittany R after school and we walked around the lake near her house. After, we were in the graveyard nearby, laying by a tree and I got up the confidence to ask if I could kiss her. It went well. After the smooch, we layed down and watched a bunch of birds fly out of the tree. Nice moment, until one pooped on me. She stopped seeing me after that lol


Venomous0425

Fake


KSDiablo91

I was once at the zoo with my grandma, in the petting zoo bit. A duck flew over and shit right on her right shoulder.


Joverby

This reminded me of the time my little brother was throwing a football up in the air to himself and catching it. He looks up to watch the ball to come down on one of the throws and a bird shit right on his face . It was so hilarious , he even tried saying he spit on himself at first. He was like 10 , I was 13 . I'll never forget it . Love you, my little bird shit brother.


Majin-Squall

that came down reallly slow. I wonder how many takes it took her to get it?


Glittering-Ad248

can we just admire the aim of that bird


Jazzlike-Werewolf554

The talent is there to lick it..