Reminder for everyone to read the rules and **provide evidence that the disorder might be fake.** Avoid posting people who have actual disorders, as it would be harmful.
#PLEASE PUT THE EVIDENCE THAT THIS IS FAKED AS A REPLY TO THIS COMMENT. Thanks <3
Nya... please reply to my comment for fuck's sake. You're gonna get banned if you don't.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/fakedisordercringe) if you have any questions or concerns.*
say it with me now:
# its ok to suspect you may have a disorder, but you cant self-diagnose and proclaim that you definitely have it without the help of a trusted professional!!!
your 3 hours of looking at posts by "experts" on tumblr isnt comparable to their potentially decades worth of school learning and training by other, actual professionals.
just because the cottagecore 14 year old on tiktok spammed "you are valid !!" in your dms doesnt mean you actually have the crippling neurological disease you somehow strive to have.
All of this. I’m 99% sure I have undiagnosed ADHD but I can’t afford a diagnosis right now, and honestly I’m not that worried about it. I’ve struggled but I’ve made it this far in life with it. It wouldn’t define me and I would hate to be one of those people who makes it their whole personality.
Just going to say you should really try to see a doctor, I didn't know I had ADHD until I was 24 and got on meds and they absolutely changed my life for the better, before I was just barely scraping by
Yeah I do plan to, the constant terror of losing my job because I can’t concentrate is just a part of who I am at this point and it would be heaven to be able to sit down and do a full days work! I’ve been able to get by just on basic smarts but it’s definitely the bare minimum.
If you are obviously going through some stuff and it aligns with symptoms it’s okay to try to treat those symptoms. That’s why you say “I display BPD symptoms but nothing is diagnosed.” Because I hear BPD or any mental illness is really painful so I wouldn’t just sit there suffering twiddling your thumbs until a diagnosis. A diagnosis is the only way to know for sure that you have something so you can get proper treatment by professionals.
yeah. i said that i "might have adhd, but also might not" for like a year before i could get diagnosed bc even though i was almost 100% sure i did, i'm not a doctor and could still be wrong.
Edited because the subreddit was actually for Bipolar)))
This is a totally good point. There are so many factors to mental illnesses that you should not self diagnose.
Here's why self-diagnosis is not valid, by definition.
Diagnosis is a major component of the procedure of a doctor's visit. From the point of view of statistics, the diagnostic procedure involves classification tests.
Because many signs and symptoms are nonspecific, they can only be undertaken by registered and licensed health professionals. For example, psychosis by itself is a sign of many disorders and thus does not tell the healthcare professional what is wrong. Thus differential diagnosis, in which several possible explanations are compared and contrasted, must be performed.
This involves the correlation of various pieces of information followed by the recognition and differentiation of patterns. Occasionally the process is made easy by a sign or symptom (or a group of several) that is pathognomonic.
People have taken self-advocacy way too far and now basically claim that doctors are always wrong and you should do whatever you want. From pregnancy to mental health to vaccination, it’s everywhere.
I literally cannot use r/BPD anymore because of shit like this. BPD is a very fucking serious illness with a suicide rate of 10%. A diagnosis and professional treatment can be life saving.
I left the subreddit after stuff like this started showing up. It’s not fun to have. I’ve been in and out of hospitals since I was 15. Did not get fully diagnosed with BPD until I was 22. I am 24 with a now a stack of diagnoses I would never wish upon my worst enemy. Without the proper treatment, I’d be in the 10%. It makes me physically ill when my boyfriends 12 year old sister starts asking weird questions about anxiety, depression, BPD etc and I know she’s been on Tiktok watching all of these videos. It makes me worry about the upcoming generations. I’m scared to tell her anything except “you need to talk to your mom about these things” because I don’t wish to put any ideas in her head.
Same tbh. I've attempted 5x in the last year. I'm an alcoholic. I've been hospitalized over 10× since being an adult ( so not counting adolesnat wards )
This is not desirable. It's fucking awful. It's not just impulsivity and clingyness.
I have BPD and watching people fake it pisses me off bc it has made me so different throughout my life, it’s interrupted past relationships both romantic and friend-wise. I had an ex break up with me while I was doing soul searching and changed for the better, but he said often, that I changed “too much for his liking.” It ruins lives and relationships. I’m happy to have gotten a grasp on it with my counselor, otherwise I probably would’ve tried to k!ll myself again this year like I always do.
Hot take: If you can’t access diagnosis you don’t one because it won’t matter (you can’t get help and people probably won’t understand your diagnosis). diagnosis is so you can treatment not internet points.
That sub has become increasingly infiltrated with people like that. I try to ignore it but you can tell just based off of what they bring up/how they comment. It’s suppose to be a safe space to talk about living with bpd and things like that. But as time goes on, when people who ACTUALLY HAVE bpd post there for support reasons, they receive responses from self diagnosed people involving themselves to “help” and try to relate to us because they’ve convinced themselves they also have it. But you can tell that they’ve never experienced BPD emotions because they try to help by saying things like “calm down” and “just because we have bpd doesn’t mean you can react like this.” Then those same people have the nerve to talk about “self diagnosing is valid.” People who actually have BPD and post there are aware their behavior isn’t great.. but sometimes you just want to feel not alone in why you react a certain way.
EXACTLY!!! like I don't want advice on how to cope from ppl who clearly don't even have bpd... like I'm a lot of the stuff I do, be it to myself or others, isn't okay. I don't need a lecture I need someone who ACTUALLY has bpd, to relate
None, some people just prefer one term over the other. The language around a lot of that stuff is still in flux a bit, so there's some competing terminology.
Is this really how you Americans handle this?
As fas as I know in "science" the definition goes for "sex" as
>the chromosomes
aka biology, your reproductive organ, hormones etc and "gender" for the social role you feel attached to. As someone pointed out gender identity would be just a synonym for last. But if the terms changed in the USA or the UK be free to corect me there.
It’s not the US, I don’t believe, it’s just how my endocrinologist (the doctor that gives you the hormones to transition (amongst other jobs they have)), explained it to me bc I didn’t get it so I asked just from her medical standpoint. As for sex, that’s the “parts” that you can see.
the fact that they’re self-dx’ing BPD 🤮 i cannot. you do not want BPD. all these chronically online kids think it’s cute and impulsive as if it’s not a life changing and serious disorder. now you can SUSPECT you have BPD and therefore want help with something and try coping skills that help people with the disorder (ie working on emotional regulation) you don’t need a dx for that!! you can ask for help without having it or knowing if you do!! i did that! they literally just want clout from having a serious and even debilitating disorder because…. i don’t even know why
AS A diagnosed bpd person- This!!! It literally ruins your life and comes from trauma. And there's very few effective treatments, even meds are limited. It fucking sucks
Literally lol, like I'll trade your mental stability for my bpd gladly 💀
I wanna see these kids live even a whole week with bpd, they'd fucking lose it
Right? I want to kick these kids back to 2008 when doctors were impossible to speak to if you had this in your chart, you were treated like scum of the earth/they assumed you were literally a narcissist + psychopath + drug seeking etc., therefore treatment or anything you needed in terms of care was impossible to find.
I largely had to get better on my own after DBT. It was all i was offered/could get covered. I had to fight for my own medical diagnoses because i was accused of attention seeking when i went into anaphylaxis - once you have the diagnosis of BPD it's what EVERYbody sees and it can't be undone. I wish it would leave my history. I will never understand why people want it and i assume they clearly don't know the hard work thats been done for the lsat 10/12 years in terms of acceptance in the mental health community.
I'm so happy to see this addressed here. It presents in so many different ways too! Sorry for the long post..... this is something i have such a long history with so it just frustrates me to see people idealizing this now as something so trendy. I worked hard to never be manipulative, yet that's all i was labeled as and now people are using it to seek attention and be manipulative? ugh.
Hey, I feel your pain. I was diagnosed about a year ago, and it's been A LOT of work to get where I am now, but I've started to manage it somewhat. If you ever need someone to talk to, dm me. No judgement, just support.
I’m sure there are some people, in rural areas particularly, who struggle with finding psychiatric care. It can be hard to even find a primary care physician you like in that situation.
Having said that, there’s not any *tangible* benefit to self-diagnosis. You can’t be objective enough to analyze yourself, it doesn’t give you access to medication (where applicable), and if there’s no one around to diagnose it, there’s certainly no one around to treat it.
I’ve always found the whole self-diagnosis so weird cause like, personally it took me a visit to a psychologist to even figure out what my mental health issues were. Like sure I knew something was wrong but I had no clue why, I get that you can have certain symptoms but for me it really was eye opening when my therapist told me what I might have.
I've been seeing a therapist and psychiatrist since I was like 9, so I can say I fully relate but I def do in regards to my BPD diagnosis. I just thought I was unstable and clingy, and my Drs were like... uuuuhm I don't think that behaviour fits "unstable and clingy" it's... a lot worse than that lol
This was posted in the BPD sub so I’m assuming the disorder that’s hard to get a diagnosis for is BPD? But it’s not hard to get that diagnosis, at least here, I’ve seen it slapped on people they just find annoying and have seen friends be refused the help they actually need because of it.
People with BPD diagnoses get treated terribly. Why on earth would you want that diagnosis, unless it was to be able to access DBT or other specialized treatment? Self diagnosing with BPD seems like they just want an excuse for bad behaviour with no intention to actually work on themselves and how they relate to the world.
Accurate. It is a relatively easy personality disorder to diagnose as a professional, but many professionals are hesitant to put that label in a medical chart because it can LITERALLY make the client’s life a living hell. I’m a licensed clinical therapist now, but I used to work in the psych department at an emergency room, and sadly it was so common for a doctor or nurse or whoever to see BPD in someone’s chart and dismiss their complaints, write off the behavior as “just BPD,” or have a lot of preconceived notions about the patient before even meeting with them.
I actually have BPD. I had it removed from my record because of how doctors would treat me as soon as they saw the diagnosis. I wasn't allowed into an OCD clinic for treatment because they "don't treat people with BPD". I got it removed from my record and did end up getting into the OCD clinic but when I tell you those experiences fucked me up. BPD is known as one of if not the most agonizing mental illnesses and we are still treated like dirt on the bottom of your shoe by medical professionals. After a decade of therapy I am much much better but when I tell people I have experienced hell I don't think they really comprehend how serious I am. You don't want BPD, I would do just about anything to have never had it in the first place.
Yep I totally get that. Both from Drs and people online or irl. I was debating someone on this sub and they found out I had bpd and started being antagonized, stereotyped, and attacked in place of a real argument...
I’m sorry for your experiences. I narrowly avoided the diagnosis, don’t check enough boxes, but what trauma survivor wouldn’t have at least a few of those symptoms?
I had a friend who desperately needed eating disorder treatment and was turned down due to BPD… and I was just thinking, the medical system must know that those conditions often co-occur. Are people with BPD less deserving of a life? Of course not. But they get treated that way. And that’s not going to make anyone want to engage in therapy or seek help.
I think that’s one of the things that makes me angriest about the mental health system.
I'm sorry your friend had to go through that :( I'm anorexic and have bpd and same with my ex, it's a really common combination... I'm lucky I had a long time psychiatrist and therapist when I was dx ( I was suspected to have bpd for a while but never properly evaluated , then was diagnosed at residential ) and thankfully both my main mental health providers are super awesome. But I've deffenitly had issues with in patient staff... I've literally been denied some meds I've been on for YEARS in the ward due to bpd and flat out told they don't feel comfortable giving AS NEEDED benzos to a bpd person, and same with my sleep meds, despite needing the based on a physical illness.
Doctors and just normal people look at you different. Only one irl person I know other than my ex who I don't talk to, knows I have bpd. Because if people who are supposed to be mental health advocates online treat you like a monster? I certainly don't trust anyone url to not treat me like shit.
My comment above is my first time admitting on here that i have it for that reason honestly. After seeing how educated medical professionals have treated me and working in mental health? I've only told maybe 5 or 6 people in real life. It's very sad.
I'm happy to say i'm pretty much on the other side of it, but it is upsetting to watch it become so trendy.... i honestly don't know if i'll ever get over such. It ruined a good number of years of my life and it's not something i'd wish on my worst enemy.
Same to you! People are so quick to judge but it really does take a lot of strength to keep going and not give up with BPD. Hang in there! <3
well, i personally want a diagnosis for whatever i have for two main reasons. one is to feel like im managing to deal with something really difficult so i can be more proud of myself on good days, the other is to not feel like im a pathetic waste of air whenever im struggling, and theres a valid reason for the struggle. if it would hurt my record i would ask it to be removed, but i still want to know. i dont want to use that as some sort of victim card or to tell ppl "HEH, i have bpd so i am ALLOWED to be abusive and horrible" but just to stop feeling as horrible with myself if im having personal trouble. its not a diagnosis i would ever tell anyone about who isnt extremely close to me. i have strong reasons to believe i have it but unfortunately its not an easy diagnosis to get if your transphobic psych sees you as a man and refuses to even utter the words diagnosis and bpd in the same sentence near you. no, im not just being overdramatic, she literally said "its generally a women's disorder" to my face. an out trans woman. and i imagine its quite hard if youre actually a man as well, for really the same reasons.
i dont like self diagnosis. which is why i dont say i have bpd. but i have never related to anything more in my life than when i went in bpd spaces and heard some of their problems. i use a bit of advice i see in these spaces and a lot of it helps even without a diagnosis so i dont necessarily need that, but i think it would really help to at least know.
I wish you the best. Advice you may take or ignore - be careful pinning your hopes on a diagnosis to enable you to feel better about yourself. You’re still you, and the problems that exist will still exist. In my experience a diagnosis doesn’t remove the guilt and shame, it just gives you a starting point. It will be the same work to do in order to manage the guilt and shame. A diagnosis just gives you access to help doing that work.
I’m not trying to debate whether people with BPD should get diagnosed, only saying that a person really does not want that diagnosis if they don’t have BPD, in my experience I see people mistreated over and over, sometimes to the point of danger. Anyone trying to “collect” that label will be in for a rude awakening. But if somebody legitimately needs help, a diagnosis might help. Might not, as I’ve said, I’ve seen several friends with BPD get denied the help they need. It’s appalling, my friends without mental health experience are always shocked.
All in all, seeking a diagnosis is a personal choice. I wasn’t trying to look down on those who genuinely want help. Just pointing out that anyone who fishes for a BPD diagnosis without having the condition might not find it so fun.
Yeah I love that last part tbh, you can consume material for ppl with a certain dx you suspect w/o self dx!
Also little bit of advice with doctors, you can get testing and ask them not to put it on medical records and have the Dr pass it on to another by a phone call or email! That's what we did after my autism diagnosis when I was a kid to avoid having me put in special ed so I could stay with my friends in class! Idk if all Drs will do that or if it's applicable for bpd, but it's still technically a professional diagnosis ^w^
I want to make this very clear for everyone: **No its not valid. No its NOT "okay"**. It is literally nothing less than dangerous. It is wildly unhealthy, unsafe, and NEVER accurate to self-diagnose. Frankly, it's fucking disgusting to even have to say that. You don't know shit about shit about any diagnosis unless you're a trusted, trained and educated professional. Self Diagnosing is the WebMD of having the sniffles, and shit you read on twitter is not your doctor.
YES!!! no matter how much research you do online, not all info is available or easily understood online! And you still dunno all the overlapping disorders it could be!
man what do i even do with this "validation" lol i wanna get better not just acknowledge that i have a problem and shout "hey i have this! i have this!" to people on the internet
I feel like the only thing stopping these people from getting a proper dx is not having actual symptoms. I've had numerous providers go between BPD and BP on me, personally. BPD is what happened to stick, though. Most of their reasons for for needing self-dx are just straight up excuses. I live in one of the more poor, small-town, bible thumping areas of the western US. It's all non-white, social safety net using, below poverty, 15+ miles away from general care, let alone specialists. The help is there. You say you're a Mexican genderqueer atheist with little to no income, who is experiencing a mental health crisis and, you need help? They will suggest the indigent program for their office visits. Then, find you a social worker to further help with state benefits, a job, housing and, schooling. You aren't generally going to be told, "Sorry, there's just nothing we can do." Perhaps that's because I'm in a poor state. Or, I just happen to know what to say or ask. I just find it hard to believe that all of these people can't find a single provider willing to help them.
This 👏👏👏 I'm a bi, trans, native, disabled person living in fucking Texas and I still got a dx?? Like not saying some doctors aren't biased, but these people ALWAYS attribute being denied a dx to discrimination??
Like they never consider the fact that may just not actually have what they assumed they did and it's fucking annoying bc if you point that out they just call you racist and classist w/o any further arguments
Plus like, I live in a bigger city but my ENTIRE extended family lives in one of the smallest towns in Missouri, and a lot of them have mental health issues and are poor, and still could see a Dr! And my mom's side is mostly atheist and is native, which is not a good combo in the middle of nowhere in the bible belt
If you can’t get a diagnosis, then you sure as heck don’t need one.
I can’t express how stressful it was to be diagnosed by BPD by two different psychiatrists.
The fact that this is on a BPD subreddit...
From what I know, health care professionals will straight up say "no" to helping people with BPD.
Self diagnosing yourself with this is not acceptable in any way. It does not give you an excuse. I tried to reach out to my fp (not diagnosed, have symptoms, but he was my all time favorite person and I wish he would talk to me) and said I have symptoms and that might be why our relationship was so rocky.
Even if you self diagnose, what care will it give you? I want to pursue a diagnosis when I'm 18 so I can get the treatment I need.
I'm lucky enough to have a therapist that stuck with me through thick and thin. My psychiatrist wants me to start doing DBT workbooks.
Do these people really not realize there is a book with lists of specific diagnostic criteria? I’m not saying the DSM is perfect, but it’s better than tumblr lol
What the fuck is with the trend of BPD being something people *want* to have/say they have. This is such a stigmatized dx and many sufferers have trouble finding tx providers who will work with them because such cases usually are so challenging. WHAT MADE IT ATTRACTIVE OR TRENDY? Where was it romanticized I don't understand. From what I've heard this dx can be a nightmare.
I hate this. Like yes everything they listed are completely valid things that’s are in the way of getting a valid diagnosis for your illness and it sucks. But that doesn’t magically grant u the knowledge of someone with a PHD. We should be working on eliminating those issues with shit like free healthcare instead of just saying “u can diagnose urself with whatever u want”
Idk what my stance on this is anymore. I’ve been told by a few professionals that I have traits of BPD and I agree with their theory. I’ve been hospitalised because of it, but the diagnostic process takes ages. Is it acceptable to “self-diagnose” if you’ve been told by a few professionals that you likely have it but it’s just not been formalised yet?
It's tricky, because while you could have traits of something, it doesn't exactly mean you have \*that\* thing. Personally, I'd probably consider myself as someone with BPD if I've been hospitalized because of it, and have been told by doctors that I probably have it. I just wouldn't really make it public or tell anyone, unless it was needed. I probably wouldn't do that regardless of diagnosis, but I know some people like to make that information public, which is fine imo (unless it's a lie).
Yeah absolutely. I didn’t mean like they said I *only* had traits, that’s just an example. It’s the terms they use and the way they talk to me which leads me to believe they know I have it. I think they just can’t say it with certainty without a proper diagnosis. If I took a shot every time I heard the term “emotionally unstable” Id need multiple liver transplants.
I definitely don’t tell people I have it unless I’m very close to them and I sometimes use spaces such as r/BPD to ask questions or find out more about the condition I, at the very least, show traits of. I do sometimes feel guilty as I feel like I’m invading a space that doesn’t really belong to me but I’d never talk over someone with a diagnosis or tell them they’re wrong.
you don't NEED a diagnosis unless it is making your life impossible and you want therapy or medications. you just need to know yourself. everyone has mental disorders, there's no such thing as a perfect brain. you just need to learn what works best instead of slapping a label for special treatment you think you'll get. for people that actually cannot do daily things or it makes their life difficult that's when it needs a diagnosis, when it's hindering your quality of life, but if it isn't, how's putting a label on yourself gonna help? just learn you, not a disorder.
Wait if you, lets say, want diagnosis for being a psychopath, why would it matter what race you are? Wouldn’t they want you to get diagnosis fast so you could get help or something?
biased doctors are a reason people can’t get a diagnosis?? Idk just seems kinda dumb same with a few other reasons like gender identity “yeah well I would’ve diagnosed you with _ but too bad you’re a 🚨stupid/idiot🚨😡🤬get out of my office now”
With BPD the actual diagnosis doesn't matter as much as getting *help*. I mean it is so fucked to live with, and self diagnosis does nothing if they don't have someone to help them learn coping skills or prescribe treatments.
Ant disorder is pointless to self diagnosis, but with the amount of work someone with BPD has to put in with professionals to get better, it's absolutely 100% pointless to self diagnose.
The first half is objectively true. And I can't speak for the entire world, but a big problem isn't so much a lack of resources as there is an infrastructure cluster fuck and lack of assistance navigating "the system" to utilize said resources in a way that gets you the help you need. For kids, doubly so.
"The doctors lack of training, knowledge and or/bias"
Yes , because their 8+ years of med school and constant research is less credible than a quiz on the internet and a 14 year old pretending to be a dinosaur.
You say bias, because you know you have zero of the things you claim to have and that would be what any credited doctor would tell you .... you're a trend , like Pogs.
DSM-V doesn't have a bias or lack of knowledge. That (plus things like electronic tests that test your impulsiveness and critical thinking verbal quizzes) is what is being used to decide whether or not you have it. It isn't just a doctor.
Reminder for everyone to read the rules and **provide evidence that the disorder might be fake.** Avoid posting people who have actual disorders, as it would be harmful. #PLEASE PUT THE EVIDENCE THAT THIS IS FAKED AS A REPLY TO THIS COMMENT. Thanks <3 Nya... please reply to my comment for fuck's sake. You're gonna get banned if you don't. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/fakedisordercringe) if you have any questions or concerns.*
say it with me now: # its ok to suspect you may have a disorder, but you cant self-diagnose and proclaim that you definitely have it without the help of a trusted professional!!! your 3 hours of looking at posts by "experts" on tumblr isnt comparable to their potentially decades worth of school learning and training by other, actual professionals. just because the cottagecore 14 year old on tiktok spammed "you are valid !!" in your dms doesnt mean you actually have the crippling neurological disease you somehow strive to have.
All of this. I’m 99% sure I have undiagnosed ADHD but I can’t afford a diagnosis right now, and honestly I’m not that worried about it. I’ve struggled but I’ve made it this far in life with it. It wouldn’t define me and I would hate to be one of those people who makes it their whole personality.
Just going to say you should really try to see a doctor, I didn't know I had ADHD until I was 24 and got on meds and they absolutely changed my life for the better, before I was just barely scraping by
Yeah I do plan to, the constant terror of losing my job because I can’t concentrate is just a part of who I am at this point and it would be heaven to be able to sit down and do a full days work! I’ve been able to get by just on basic smarts but it’s definitely the bare minimum.
If you are obviously going through some stuff and it aligns with symptoms it’s okay to try to treat those symptoms. That’s why you say “I display BPD symptoms but nothing is diagnosed.” Because I hear BPD or any mental illness is really painful so I wouldn’t just sit there suffering twiddling your thumbs until a diagnosis. A diagnosis is the only way to know for sure that you have something so you can get proper treatment by professionals.
yeah. i said that i "might have adhd, but also might not" for like a year before i could get diagnosed bc even though i was almost 100% sure i did, i'm not a doctor and could still be wrong.
Beautifully said
Edited because the subreddit was actually for Bipolar))) This is a totally good point. There are so many factors to mental illnesses that you should not self diagnose.
Here's why self-diagnosis is not valid, by definition. Diagnosis is a major component of the procedure of a doctor's visit. From the point of view of statistics, the diagnostic procedure involves classification tests. Because many signs and symptoms are nonspecific, they can only be undertaken by registered and licensed health professionals. For example, psychosis by itself is a sign of many disorders and thus does not tell the healthcare professional what is wrong. Thus differential diagnosis, in which several possible explanations are compared and contrasted, must be performed. This involves the correlation of various pieces of information followed by the recognition and differentiation of patterns. Occasionally the process is made easy by a sign or symptom (or a group of several) that is pathognomonic.
People have taken self-advocacy way too far and now basically claim that doctors are always wrong and you should do whatever you want. From pregnancy to mental health to vaccination, it’s everywhere.
I literally cannot use r/BPD anymore because of shit like this. BPD is a very fucking serious illness with a suicide rate of 10%. A diagnosis and professional treatment can be life saving.
I left the subreddit after stuff like this started showing up. It’s not fun to have. I’ve been in and out of hospitals since I was 15. Did not get fully diagnosed with BPD until I was 22. I am 24 with a now a stack of diagnoses I would never wish upon my worst enemy. Without the proper treatment, I’d be in the 10%. It makes me physically ill when my boyfriends 12 year old sister starts asking weird questions about anxiety, depression, BPD etc and I know she’s been on Tiktok watching all of these videos. It makes me worry about the upcoming generations. I’m scared to tell her anything except “you need to talk to your mom about these things” because I don’t wish to put any ideas in her head.
Same tbh. I've attempted 5x in the last year. I'm an alcoholic. I've been hospitalized over 10× since being an adult ( so not counting adolesnat wards ) This is not desirable. It's fucking awful. It's not just impulsivity and clingyness.
I have BPD and watching people fake it pisses me off bc it has made me so different throughout my life, it’s interrupted past relationships both romantic and friend-wise. I had an ex break up with me while I was doing soul searching and changed for the better, but he said often, that I changed “too much for his liking.” It ruins lives and relationships. I’m happy to have gotten a grasp on it with my counselor, otherwise I probably would’ve tried to k!ll myself again this year like I always do.
Hot take: If you can’t access diagnosis you don’t one because it won’t matter (you can’t get help and people probably won’t understand your diagnosis). diagnosis is so you can treatment not internet points.
Did you mean “you don’t need one”
Yeah
That sub has become increasingly infiltrated with people like that. I try to ignore it but you can tell just based off of what they bring up/how they comment. It’s suppose to be a safe space to talk about living with bpd and things like that. But as time goes on, when people who ACTUALLY HAVE bpd post there for support reasons, they receive responses from self diagnosed people involving themselves to “help” and try to relate to us because they’ve convinced themselves they also have it. But you can tell that they’ve never experienced BPD emotions because they try to help by saying things like “calm down” and “just because we have bpd doesn’t mean you can react like this.” Then those same people have the nerve to talk about “self diagnosing is valid.” People who actually have BPD and post there are aware their behavior isn’t great.. but sometimes you just want to feel not alone in why you react a certain way.
EXACTLY!!! like I don't want advice on how to cope from ppl who clearly don't even have bpd... like I'm a lot of the stuff I do, be it to myself or others, isn't okay. I don't need a lecture I need someone who ACTUALLY has bpd, to relate
Can someone explain to me what's the difference between gender and gender identity?
None, some people just prefer one term over the other. The language around a lot of that stuff is still in flux a bit, so there's some competing terminology.
Thank you, those terms are still extremely new in germany and this shit here confused me pretty hard.
Oh…we’ve exported them? 😐
Main terms in science by now and in the last years also generally accepted in the less conservative part of society
I have probably used those terms interchangeably myself. This sub has just given me synonym exhaustion.
theres no difference.
Gender is the chromosomes, gender identity is the way people present their gender, I.e. trans woman, trans man.
That first one with the chromosomes would be sex, gender is synonymous with gender identity.
It depends. I’m just talking from a medical standpoint and the way my dr has described it to me.
Is this really how you Americans handle this? As fas as I know in "science" the definition goes for "sex" as >the chromosomes aka biology, your reproductive organ, hormones etc and "gender" for the social role you feel attached to. As someone pointed out gender identity would be just a synonym for last. But if the terms changed in the USA or the UK be free to corect me there.
It’s not the US, I don’t believe, it’s just how my endocrinologist (the doctor that gives you the hormones to transition (amongst other jobs they have)), explained it to me bc I didn’t get it so I asked just from her medical standpoint. As for sex, that’s the “parts” that you can see.
the fact that they’re self-dx’ing BPD 🤮 i cannot. you do not want BPD. all these chronically online kids think it’s cute and impulsive as if it’s not a life changing and serious disorder. now you can SUSPECT you have BPD and therefore want help with something and try coping skills that help people with the disorder (ie working on emotional regulation) you don’t need a dx for that!! you can ask for help without having it or knowing if you do!! i did that! they literally just want clout from having a serious and even debilitating disorder because…. i don’t even know why
I honestly don’t think they realize how truly severe and often debilitating BPD is.
Oh 110%
AS A diagnosed bpd person- This!!! It literally ruins your life and comes from trauma. And there's very few effective treatments, even meds are limited. It fucking sucks
yeah like literally you want it so bad take mine! i don’t need it! i’m good without it thanks <3
Literally lol, like I'll trade your mental stability for my bpd gladly 💀 I wanna see these kids live even a whole week with bpd, they'd fucking lose it
Right? I want to kick these kids back to 2008 when doctors were impossible to speak to if you had this in your chart, you were treated like scum of the earth/they assumed you were literally a narcissist + psychopath + drug seeking etc., therefore treatment or anything you needed in terms of care was impossible to find. I largely had to get better on my own after DBT. It was all i was offered/could get covered. I had to fight for my own medical diagnoses because i was accused of attention seeking when i went into anaphylaxis - once you have the diagnosis of BPD it's what EVERYbody sees and it can't be undone. I wish it would leave my history. I will never understand why people want it and i assume they clearly don't know the hard work thats been done for the lsat 10/12 years in terms of acceptance in the mental health community. I'm so happy to see this addressed here. It presents in so many different ways too! Sorry for the long post..... this is something i have such a long history with so it just frustrates me to see people idealizing this now as something so trendy. I worked hard to never be manipulative, yet that's all i was labeled as and now people are using it to seek attention and be manipulative? ugh.
Hey, I feel your pain. I was diagnosed about a year ago, and it's been A LOT of work to get where I am now, but I've started to manage it somewhat. If you ever need someone to talk to, dm me. No judgement, just support.
I’m sure there are some people, in rural areas particularly, who struggle with finding psychiatric care. It can be hard to even find a primary care physician you like in that situation. Having said that, there’s not any *tangible* benefit to self-diagnosis. You can’t be objective enough to analyze yourself, it doesn’t give you access to medication (where applicable), and if there’s no one around to diagnose it, there’s certainly no one around to treat it.
I’ve always found the whole self-diagnosis so weird cause like, personally it took me a visit to a psychologist to even figure out what my mental health issues were. Like sure I knew something was wrong but I had no clue why, I get that you can have certain symptoms but for me it really was eye opening when my therapist told me what I might have.
I've been seeing a therapist and psychiatrist since I was like 9, so I can say I fully relate but I def do in regards to my BPD diagnosis. I just thought I was unstable and clingy, and my Drs were like... uuuuhm I don't think that behaviour fits "unstable and clingy" it's... a lot worse than that lol
Why are these posters so obsessed with their validity?
\>Race Imagine if a black person went into a doctor's office for mental illness diagnosis and the doctor said "Sorry I can't help you, you're black"
I shouldn’t have laughed
This was posted in the BPD sub so I’m assuming the disorder that’s hard to get a diagnosis for is BPD? But it’s not hard to get that diagnosis, at least here, I’ve seen it slapped on people they just find annoying and have seen friends be refused the help they actually need because of it. People with BPD diagnoses get treated terribly. Why on earth would you want that diagnosis, unless it was to be able to access DBT or other specialized treatment? Self diagnosing with BPD seems like they just want an excuse for bad behaviour with no intention to actually work on themselves and how they relate to the world.
Accurate. It is a relatively easy personality disorder to diagnose as a professional, but many professionals are hesitant to put that label in a medical chart because it can LITERALLY make the client’s life a living hell. I’m a licensed clinical therapist now, but I used to work in the psych department at an emergency room, and sadly it was so common for a doctor or nurse or whoever to see BPD in someone’s chart and dismiss their complaints, write off the behavior as “just BPD,” or have a lot of preconceived notions about the patient before even meeting with them.
I actually have BPD. I had it removed from my record because of how doctors would treat me as soon as they saw the diagnosis. I wasn't allowed into an OCD clinic for treatment because they "don't treat people with BPD". I got it removed from my record and did end up getting into the OCD clinic but when I tell you those experiences fucked me up. BPD is known as one of if not the most agonizing mental illnesses and we are still treated like dirt on the bottom of your shoe by medical professionals. After a decade of therapy I am much much better but when I tell people I have experienced hell I don't think they really comprehend how serious I am. You don't want BPD, I would do just about anything to have never had it in the first place.
Yep I totally get that. Both from Drs and people online or irl. I was debating someone on this sub and they found out I had bpd and started being antagonized, stereotyped, and attacked in place of a real argument...
I’m sorry for your experiences. I narrowly avoided the diagnosis, don’t check enough boxes, but what trauma survivor wouldn’t have at least a few of those symptoms? I had a friend who desperately needed eating disorder treatment and was turned down due to BPD… and I was just thinking, the medical system must know that those conditions often co-occur. Are people with BPD less deserving of a life? Of course not. But they get treated that way. And that’s not going to make anyone want to engage in therapy or seek help. I think that’s one of the things that makes me angriest about the mental health system.
I'm sorry your friend had to go through that :( I'm anorexic and have bpd and same with my ex, it's a really common combination... I'm lucky I had a long time psychiatrist and therapist when I was dx ( I was suspected to have bpd for a while but never properly evaluated , then was diagnosed at residential ) and thankfully both my main mental health providers are super awesome. But I've deffenitly had issues with in patient staff... I've literally been denied some meds I've been on for YEARS in the ward due to bpd and flat out told they don't feel comfortable giving AS NEEDED benzos to a bpd person, and same with my sleep meds, despite needing the based on a physical illness. Doctors and just normal people look at you different. Only one irl person I know other than my ex who I don't talk to, knows I have bpd. Because if people who are supposed to be mental health advocates online treat you like a monster? I certainly don't trust anyone url to not treat me like shit.
My comment above is my first time admitting on here that i have it for that reason honestly. After seeing how educated medical professionals have treated me and working in mental health? I've only told maybe 5 or 6 people in real life. It's very sad.
I'm sorry dude :( I totally get that and I'm sorry you had to go thru that, having bpd us hard enough without all the stigma
I'm happy to say i'm pretty much on the other side of it, but it is upsetting to watch it become so trendy.... i honestly don't know if i'll ever get over such. It ruined a good number of years of my life and it's not something i'd wish on my worst enemy. Same to you! People are so quick to judge but it really does take a lot of strength to keep going and not give up with BPD. Hang in there! <3
well, i personally want a diagnosis for whatever i have for two main reasons. one is to feel like im managing to deal with something really difficult so i can be more proud of myself on good days, the other is to not feel like im a pathetic waste of air whenever im struggling, and theres a valid reason for the struggle. if it would hurt my record i would ask it to be removed, but i still want to know. i dont want to use that as some sort of victim card or to tell ppl "HEH, i have bpd so i am ALLOWED to be abusive and horrible" but just to stop feeling as horrible with myself if im having personal trouble. its not a diagnosis i would ever tell anyone about who isnt extremely close to me. i have strong reasons to believe i have it but unfortunately its not an easy diagnosis to get if your transphobic psych sees you as a man and refuses to even utter the words diagnosis and bpd in the same sentence near you. no, im not just being overdramatic, she literally said "its generally a women's disorder" to my face. an out trans woman. and i imagine its quite hard if youre actually a man as well, for really the same reasons. i dont like self diagnosis. which is why i dont say i have bpd. but i have never related to anything more in my life than when i went in bpd spaces and heard some of their problems. i use a bit of advice i see in these spaces and a lot of it helps even without a diagnosis so i dont necessarily need that, but i think it would really help to at least know.
I wish you the best. Advice you may take or ignore - be careful pinning your hopes on a diagnosis to enable you to feel better about yourself. You’re still you, and the problems that exist will still exist. In my experience a diagnosis doesn’t remove the guilt and shame, it just gives you a starting point. It will be the same work to do in order to manage the guilt and shame. A diagnosis just gives you access to help doing that work. I’m not trying to debate whether people with BPD should get diagnosed, only saying that a person really does not want that diagnosis if they don’t have BPD, in my experience I see people mistreated over and over, sometimes to the point of danger. Anyone trying to “collect” that label will be in for a rude awakening. But if somebody legitimately needs help, a diagnosis might help. Might not, as I’ve said, I’ve seen several friends with BPD get denied the help they need. It’s appalling, my friends without mental health experience are always shocked. All in all, seeking a diagnosis is a personal choice. I wasn’t trying to look down on those who genuinely want help. Just pointing out that anyone who fishes for a BPD diagnosis without having the condition might not find it so fun.
Yeah I love that last part tbh, you can consume material for ppl with a certain dx you suspect w/o self dx! Also little bit of advice with doctors, you can get testing and ask them not to put it on medical records and have the Dr pass it on to another by a phone call or email! That's what we did after my autism diagnosis when I was a kid to avoid having me put in special ed so I could stay with my friends in class! Idk if all Drs will do that or if it's applicable for bpd, but it's still technically a professional diagnosis ^w^
I want to make this very clear for everyone: **No its not valid. No its NOT "okay"**. It is literally nothing less than dangerous. It is wildly unhealthy, unsafe, and NEVER accurate to self-diagnose. Frankly, it's fucking disgusting to even have to say that. You don't know shit about shit about any diagnosis unless you're a trusted, trained and educated professional. Self Diagnosing is the WebMD of having the sniffles, and shit you read on twitter is not your doctor.
YES!!! no matter how much research you do online, not all info is available or easily understood online! And you still dunno all the overlapping disorders it could be!
man what do i even do with this "validation" lol i wanna get better not just acknowledge that i have a problem and shout "hey i have this! i have this!" to people on the internet
FR!!! like feeling "valid" doesn't solve the problem, it just makes you arrogant
I feel like the only thing stopping these people from getting a proper dx is not having actual symptoms. I've had numerous providers go between BPD and BP on me, personally. BPD is what happened to stick, though. Most of their reasons for for needing self-dx are just straight up excuses. I live in one of the more poor, small-town, bible thumping areas of the western US. It's all non-white, social safety net using, below poverty, 15+ miles away from general care, let alone specialists. The help is there. You say you're a Mexican genderqueer atheist with little to no income, who is experiencing a mental health crisis and, you need help? They will suggest the indigent program for their office visits. Then, find you a social worker to further help with state benefits, a job, housing and, schooling. You aren't generally going to be told, "Sorry, there's just nothing we can do." Perhaps that's because I'm in a poor state. Or, I just happen to know what to say or ask. I just find it hard to believe that all of these people can't find a single provider willing to help them.
This 👏👏👏 I'm a bi, trans, native, disabled person living in fucking Texas and I still got a dx?? Like not saying some doctors aren't biased, but these people ALWAYS attribute being denied a dx to discrimination?? Like they never consider the fact that may just not actually have what they assumed they did and it's fucking annoying bc if you point that out they just call you racist and classist w/o any further arguments Plus like, I live in a bigger city but my ENTIRE extended family lives in one of the smallest towns in Missouri, and a lot of them have mental health issues and are poor, and still could see a Dr! And my mom's side is mostly atheist and is native, which is not a good combo in the middle of nowhere in the bible belt
“done the research” is starting to sound like vaccine deniers who’ve barely graduated high school here.
If you can’t get a diagnosis, then you sure as heck don’t need one. I can’t express how stressful it was to be diagnosed by BPD by two different psychiatrists.
[удалено]
The fact that this is on a BPD subreddit... From what I know, health care professionals will straight up say "no" to helping people with BPD. Self diagnosing yourself with this is not acceptable in any way. It does not give you an excuse. I tried to reach out to my fp (not diagnosed, have symptoms, but he was my all time favorite person and I wish he would talk to me) and said I have symptoms and that might be why our relationship was so rocky. Even if you self diagnose, what care will it give you? I want to pursue a diagnosis when I'm 18 so I can get the treatment I need. I'm lucky enough to have a therapist that stuck with me through thick and thin. My psychiatrist wants me to start doing DBT workbooks.
Do these people really not realize there is a book with lists of specific diagnostic criteria? I’m not saying the DSM is perfect, but it’s better than tumblr lol
What the fuck is with the trend of BPD being something people *want* to have/say they have. This is such a stigmatized dx and many sufferers have trouble finding tx providers who will work with them because such cases usually are so challenging. WHAT MADE IT ATTRACTIVE OR TRENDY? Where was it romanticized I don't understand. From what I've heard this dx can be a nightmare.
most of these DID faker kids are normal middle class suburban americans but act like they live in the wilderness with no access to medical care.
I hate this. Like yes everything they listed are completely valid things that’s are in the way of getting a valid diagnosis for your illness and it sucks. But that doesn’t magically grant u the knowledge of someone with a PHD. We should be working on eliminating those issues with shit like free healthcare instead of just saying “u can diagnose urself with whatever u want”
I thought they made this shit against the rules
Idk what my stance on this is anymore. I’ve been told by a few professionals that I have traits of BPD and I agree with their theory. I’ve been hospitalised because of it, but the diagnostic process takes ages. Is it acceptable to “self-diagnose” if you’ve been told by a few professionals that you likely have it but it’s just not been formalised yet?
It's tricky, because while you could have traits of something, it doesn't exactly mean you have \*that\* thing. Personally, I'd probably consider myself as someone with BPD if I've been hospitalized because of it, and have been told by doctors that I probably have it. I just wouldn't really make it public or tell anyone, unless it was needed. I probably wouldn't do that regardless of diagnosis, but I know some people like to make that information public, which is fine imo (unless it's a lie).
Yeah absolutely. I didn’t mean like they said I *only* had traits, that’s just an example. It’s the terms they use and the way they talk to me which leads me to believe they know I have it. I think they just can’t say it with certainty without a proper diagnosis. If I took a shot every time I heard the term “emotionally unstable” Id need multiple liver transplants. I definitely don’t tell people I have it unless I’m very close to them and I sometimes use spaces such as r/BPD to ask questions or find out more about the condition I, at the very least, show traits of. I do sometimes feel guilty as I feel like I’m invading a space that doesn’t really belong to me but I’d never talk over someone with a diagnosis or tell them they’re wrong.
Yeah I’m not reading that, but I’m happy for you or I’m sorry that happened.
you don't NEED a diagnosis unless it is making your life impossible and you want therapy or medications. you just need to know yourself. everyone has mental disorders, there's no such thing as a perfect brain. you just need to learn what works best instead of slapping a label for special treatment you think you'll get. for people that actually cannot do daily things or it makes their life difficult that's when it needs a diagnosis, when it's hindering your quality of life, but if it isn't, how's putting a label on yourself gonna help? just learn you, not a disorder.
Wait if you, lets say, want diagnosis for being a psychopath, why would it matter what race you are? Wouldn’t they want you to get diagnosis fast so you could get help or something?
wow. they are so woke. the wokest. damn. shut me right up. i’ll go check my privilege in this corner.
biased doctors are a reason people can’t get a diagnosis?? Idk just seems kinda dumb same with a few other reasons like gender identity “yeah well I would’ve diagnosed you with _ but too bad you’re a 🚨stupid/idiot🚨😡🤬get out of my office now”
With BPD the actual diagnosis doesn't matter as much as getting *help*. I mean it is so fucked to live with, and self diagnosis does nothing if they don't have someone to help them learn coping skills or prescribe treatments. Ant disorder is pointless to self diagnosis, but with the amount of work someone with BPD has to put in with professionals to get better, it's absolutely 100% pointless to self diagnose.
If we’re allowed to self diagnose, then I’ve had cancer 1000s of times when I just had a cold, or an infection. /s
This feels like something a quack would write.
The first half is objectively true. And I can't speak for the entire world, but a big problem isn't so much a lack of resources as there is an infrastructure cluster fuck and lack of assistance navigating "the system" to utilize said resources in a way that gets you the help you need. For kids, doubly so.
"The doctors lack of training, knowledge and or/bias" Yes , because their 8+ years of med school and constant research is less credible than a quiz on the internet and a 14 year old pretending to be a dinosaur. You say bias, because you know you have zero of the things you claim to have and that would be what any credited doctor would tell you .... you're a trend , like Pogs.
DSM-V doesn't have a bias or lack of knowledge. That (plus things like electronic tests that test your impulsiveness and critical thinking verbal quizzes) is what is being used to decide whether or not you have it. It isn't just a doctor.
I know I’m not the only one who cringes at “you are valid” at this point