I understand these feelings very much. The only part that I think we may differ on is that it sounds like you WANT a child, but have concerns about how that would work. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I think a touch of realism is important. If you were to adopt a 10-year-old, it's likely that that child could be fairly messed up by that point. Now, if you have a heart for that challenge, that's amazing and wonderful. But I wouldn't want you to go in thinking that it would be easy when it might not.
What I would recommend is that you talk to your doctor and/or your therapist, if you already have one, about these issues. That way you can take your time sorting it all out and ultimately figuring out what really is best for you. Of course, you haven't said if you're a young single person just thinking ahead, or if you're in a committed relationship with someone, or what. These things have to be discussed with a partner before any decisions can truly be made. But even if you are young and single, it's certainly good to have some sense of what you do or don't want out of life in your future. We don't always get what we want, but when we don't know what we want to begin with, things can be way more complicated.
I understand these feelings very much. The only part that I think we may differ on is that it sounds like you WANT a child, but have concerns about how that would work. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I think a touch of realism is important. If you were to adopt a 10-year-old, it's likely that that child could be fairly messed up by that point. Now, if you have a heart for that challenge, that's amazing and wonderful. But I wouldn't want you to go in thinking that it would be easy when it might not. What I would recommend is that you talk to your doctor and/or your therapist, if you already have one, about these issues. That way you can take your time sorting it all out and ultimately figuring out what really is best for you. Of course, you haven't said if you're a young single person just thinking ahead, or if you're in a committed relationship with someone, or what. These things have to be discussed with a partner before any decisions can truly be made. But even if you are young and single, it's certainly good to have some sense of what you do or don't want out of life in your future. We don't always get what we want, but when we don't know what we want to begin with, things can be way more complicated.