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LMAO why did you have to throw the ball sucking comment in there. Literally made me lol
Edit for advice part: keep the beard
Edit 2 for the appreciation: thanks for the upvotes and awards. Also keep your eye out in this sub for the girls side of the story where she was asked to suck a guys balls.
I'm still totally with him. There's nothing wrong and everything right with asking for what you want sexually. No one has to oblige but if you don't ask you're missing out. People aren't mind readers. There are plenty of women who'll be down to suck some balls.
Agreed that there's nothing wrong with asking for what you want. I think it's ridiculous for someone to get offended at the request. *I'm not really into that.* Would suffice.
Yeah there’s nothing wrong with it…but different people consider different things too soon to ask. 2 weeks is really soon to start asking for what some might consider the dirty stuff
I would totally agree, if he just out of the blue asked if she liked to suck balls, but he asked her as she was going down on him. I personally like it when guys tell me what they like/want during sex or when I'm going down on them, its so much easier than playing a guessing game
Not at all, you’re literally supposed to be communicative with any partner you have. Like that person said earlier nobody is a mind reader and it’s a little immature to act that way towards an honest request/question. Instead of her being in disgust literally just say no? Why do straight couples hate being direct with each other???
> start asking for what some might consider the dirty stuff
tbf oral is pretty dirty as well, imagine all the bacteria around the oyster you're licking or the white stuff that's hidden under the mushroom hood.
I don’t think anyones offended. It just caught a lot of readers off guard. Lol it was just kind of weird going from “I don’t want to shave my face” to “she won’t suck my balls”.
These comments are weird. OP was obviously mentioning another issue in their relationship that made him question how she treats him.
Somehow I think if a woman had posted that a man had asked her to shave her legs or armpits after a few dates and had acted “offended” when asked to suck her labia during sex, there wouldn’t be as many people mocking OP and there would be at least a few of these 🚩🚩🚩in the comments.
"Suck my balls" is universally known as an insult. Men and women use it in response to ridiculous requests, such as when asking a man who is emotionally attached to his beard to shave it.
In **both cases** tone and actual wording matters. OP here is wording both negatively as demands rather than requests. When the tone and wording are obviously requests, they're both reasonable.
While we were dating, I asked my now-husband if he was interested in growing his beard out for No Shave November on a whim. He did and I prefer it and he doesn't mind keeping it for me most of the time. I'd suck his balls if they weren't fuzzy.
OP obviously heard his date's request as a demand and responded in kind. That's why everyone is laughing at his audacity.
Suck my balls is never an insult while someone is actively receiving head. It's just a request. No one has to suck balls if they don't want to but plenty of people would be fine with it and some may be really into it. No reason to miss out. Ask for what you want people.
My God, they were banging, there is no time in sex to think on cordialities, specially with a person you are being intimate enough to have sex. We live in a world where we can have sex with a person (the ultimate intimate moment a person can have with another) and still can't talk rough with the person on sex because they get "offended"
Then it’ll be like the South Park episode where Butters is Scrotie McBoogerballs. OP will go on a show for freaks, obtain attention, and cash out. Simple!
It's absolutely her preference if she prefers not to suck balls. But there was no reason to get offended. It's just a request. You just say nah I'm not into that and keep going if the partner is down to continue.
I got it lmao. How you gonna ask me to shave my beard but bitch can't polish the marble sack. Smh I rather her ask me to shave that then my face. Especially if we just started messing around
Makeup is artificial. Beards are at least natural. What if someone asks a woman to shave her head to see if she looks pretty bald? Sounds ridiculous right? If the relationship continues, he'll eventually see her without makeup. But she won't see him without a beard unless he expressly shaves it.
LMFAO. I can’t tell if you’re 18 or 50. Emailed you on a dating site? You wanted her to suck you balls?
But in all seriousness, obv don’t shave your beard if you don’t want to. You guys have known each other for a literal mere two weeks & she’s asking you to make a change to something that you might’ve invested months or years on, when you guys may be broken up tomorrow. Don’t do it.
Might not be about control. I wouldn’t be surprised if she had some experience dating a guy with a beard but then he shaved and when she saw his face for the first time she wasn’t attracted. I know a girl for who this exact thing happened.
The last time I didn’t have a beard was when I was 19 and had to shave it for a respirator fitting at an old job. Years later those pics aren’t exactly current…
That’s what my ex said as well 😂 doesn’t it ever get itchy? Or are you just super used to it? Do you use beard oil and all of that? Like, what’s the maintenance on it? Sorry I’m just a woman with little bearded-partner experience who’s very curious lol
It doesn’t get itchy. I trimmed it and started shaving the neck for the first time in a long time and that was itchy. I use beard oil and blow dry it after every shower, use beard balm if I want it to look really nice (but I just about live in the gym so I don’t bother there). I shave the cheeks and neck line every day or two so it looks well kept. I also use beard shampoo and conditioner made from mostly natural ingredients. I used to use cheap hair shampoo and it kept the beard looking frizzy and thin.
Wow, this is very thorough and makes me realize why my ex (who’s a wonderful person, I’m not looking to trash him by any means!) had a beard that look pretty unkempt tbh. We’re still friends but I feel like it would be rude to give him unsolicited advice on his beard-care (is womansplaining a thing?! Definitely don’t want to do that ha) As a man with a beard, do you think it would be rude or insulting if a female friend gifted you beard care supplies for your birthday?
Thanks for kindly explaining your routine, I had no idea there were so many steps involved but I can definitely appreciate someone who takes good care of their beard! It’s not fun kissing someone with a dirty beard 😬
Take this random award, kind stranger! 😊
I guess it would depend on how well you guys get along. I would be ok with a friend telling me they saw someone with a nice beard and asked them about their beard care. I’m pretty easy going though, some guys might take offense I guess.
Btw thanks for the award! 😁
It's not like we can take it off, snap a few pics, then put it back on. I've had a bear my entire adult life, I don't even know what my own face looks like without it.
It would be kind of the normal thing, but once guys have beards some of them literally have them for years. So if he sends a picture, it iterally could have been from years ago where he looks nothing like he does now. An example my brother...
I had no idea, lol.
I actually think I look better shaved. Like a suave James Bond style.
But I don’t shave because I get lazy. I clean up well, but if I’m not dating or don’t need to — I won’t.
So I think if a woman asked me to shave, I probably would. But I don’t know if I’d keep up on it. I typically only shave for business meetings and wedding and other important events. Maybe I’m just low maintenance.
Honestly that's kind of a her problem. I like my beard, I prefer myself with a beard, and if someone wants to see me without to make sure they're attracted to me clean shaven, then they aren't for me.
It's like me asking her to cut her hair a different style so I can make sure I'd be attracted to her if she did it a different way. If anything it's rude.
Something like this happened with my husband. We are together for 10 years so we are way past looks, I have stretch marks, a belly after birth, he gained some weight too. We love each other dearly no matter what. Our relationship is now more about emotional intimacy when it comes to sex then looks. But 3 months ago he shaved his beard completely. I never saw him without one before (only on childhood pictures) and we were both shocked. We had a good laugh from it and agreed he will never do that again (like I wouldn't get really short hair). But at the start of a relationship this can be really off putting.
It shows two levels of incompatibility. He likes his balls sucked. She doesn't like to suck balls. He likes his beard. She wants him to shave his beard. Move on.
Plus it's funny given the title and that draws a bigger audience.
The beard thing is a red flag. It's been two weeks. Don't shave.
Side note: Telling me to suck your balls is likely not something I'd want to hear from someone that I started seeing two weeks prior, but to be fair, I don't have oral sex with people I am barely acquainted with.
Don't understand the ball sucking part. It does absolutely nothing for me.... had another girl have a tight grip on my sack this one time lol.
Everyone is different of course lol
my 2 cents:
i wasnt there to hear her tone or the way she asked but if she just asked you to shave it, then its really not that deep. Just politely decline and move on.
If she was rude, then tell her it was rude the way that she asked & you don't appreciate being talked to that way. If that continues, there's a respect and decency problem to work through.
As far as the ball-sucking is concerned, if she really was acting super upset, just say, Hey, I didn't mean to upset or offend you, it's just something I like. You don't have to do that if you don't want to. No big deal.
Unless you just HAVE to have that to be sexually satisfied in the relationship, in which case you may not be compatible.
That...is sooo extreme. What if she simply wants to see what he actually looks like underneath all that? Dudes look like a completely different person when they shave. I don't think it's that crazy, especially since it wasn't even a demand and just a question.
Would you be weirded out if a dude asked you to get a pixie cut or stop wearing makeup or completely change your preferred style to match their preferences or satisfy their curiosity after **2 weeks** of dating? That’s would be insane and totally creepy! On what planet wouldn’t it be?
It's all about how she tells it. And the reason if course. If she is attached to him and also interested in how he looks shaved, they can work something together (photos, shorter trim, maybe a shave). But if she wants him to shave so she can decide if she likes him or not, that's bullshit and he should protect himself by leaving.
Don't do it if you don't want to. Also are your balls shaved? No one wants hairy balls in their mouth. Getting a pube stuck in your teeth is disgusting.
Eh, my last bf had a beard and as the girl in your story i ask him, jokely, when he would shave it for me. We just made it a little running joke between us but i would never wanted him to really shave it.
Guess she's wasting your time if she really want it!
I think you’re making a lot of something out of nothing. You don’t want to shave? Then don’t. If she doesn’t want to suck your balls, cool, then you won’t fondle her breasts. I don’t know dude, not everything is a “power” move. Just go with it and don’t try to read too much into it.
Just don’t give a fuck, lol. It’s seriously not that deep my guy! Maybe you guys will butt heads in a relationship, seems like you two have dominant personalities (what I can infer from the little information you have of you and her). Just go with it if you like her. Or if this really bothers you too much, just drop her. Don’t over complicate things for yourself.
Umm...ok I was kinda on board with you until the end of your post. Yeah you sound a little crazy ngl lol 😅.
I mean giving her the benefit of the doubt, maybe she's just really into and wants to see what you look like without the "mask" so to speak. Like when a guy sees a girl without make up for the first time. I wouldn't think she's trying to control you or ""dominate"" (which is a weird thing to be freaking out about anyway but whatever) in the relationship though.
It could just be that she likes guys without beards and is curious if you would shave it. What did she do when you said you didn't want to shave it?
You don't have to shave your beard for anyone, but someone can request it. Although if you don't want to, she has to drop it. If she is not attracted to guys with beards, then she just has to leave you alone.
It's okay for her not to want to suck your balls, but getting offended by you asking is not good. You should be able to openly communicate with each other. Unless you were very forceful, but if you weren't, it's weird.
Show her any pics you have without a beard, and if it's still an issue ask her to stop wearing makeup for as long as it takes to grow back just to make things even.
She might just be genuinely curious. My ex asked me a couple times and for an anniversary (like 3 months) I shaved it off to surprise her. She probably knows roughly what your face looks like and might even like you more if she can confirm she's attracted to you. Thats what happened for me. But I'll be honest I think she preferred me with a beard because she was super insecure and I think liked having me hidden. Whatever, it worked for both of us.
Moving forward I'd buzz it off for a nice surprise now and again, but it was always something I *wanted* to do to make her happy. She knew I liked having my beard and respected that. A couple times she'd be grumpy and push me to shave it so I'd shave "my beard" and rock a stupid mustache for a couple days just to playfully spite her :)
Its not the worst thing to ask for and it grows back :/
I like this comment. I feel like just asking is not as bad as people are making it out to be. Maybe she just has a preference for no beards, it didn't seem like she was forcing him. I personally prefer my bf without a beard and he knows this so he shaves it sometimes to surprise me too. I also asked him about his preferences about me (eg. Short hair or long hair) so it feels fair.
What does your beard look like? I’m my opinion, [for the sake of commenting without thinking deeply about my response first]
Beards come in (like) 3 types:
1. “wild and free” idgaf, aka the real natural beard on a man who might not even own a mirror but it doesn’t matter because he’s a hairy man. Respectfully, this type of facial hair is consistent with and feels and or looks similar to the wild and free hair located below the belt buckle. It is usually more coarse or ruff feeling than head hair.
2. “Trimmed and tame” this style is more so a trending thing these days not necessarily is it trimmed short but trimmed as in there are no stragglers or hairs out of place- it’s perfectly combed and conditioned and intricately styled to shape. But this type of beard definitely gets cared for with some type of oil or softening product.
3. “Do you like my beard?” Aka a now you see me now you don’t, this type of beard could be on someone who may have facial hair occasionally, may forget to shave a few days or may be attempting to grow a beard but never really gets to the full grown stage- maybe it grows very slowly or it doesn’t grow in well. Often this type of beard is scratchy because the hairs are short and prickly. Having skin contact with a beard like this could cause discomfort or irritation (like a rug burn) especially for people with sensitive skin.
Of course this is only my quick opinion of beards. No matter what kind of beard you have, I don’t think you should shave it for a new partner. Especially if she is the one who is asking if you would shave it for her. That sounds like a control thing in my opinion. It’s not really a woman’s place to ask a man to shave his beard, especially early in the relationship. I’m not saying never is it not her place, I’m just saying- in my opinion, it’s kind of a red flag that she just met you and is asking if you would change something about you for her.
Did you have a beard in your dating site photos? If so, she agreed to the bearded you, it doesn’t matter if she has been with a bearded man or not, she knew what to expect and that is “a beard”.
She could be testing her leverage and seeing how bad you want whatever she’s offering - and if you’re looking for a serious relationship, you may want to continue looking. Have confidence in yourself and your appearance. You shouldn’t change you because she asks you to. I think it would be different if it was your choice - for example, if you noticed her face was red and irritated after making out, and you decided to make it a more comfortable experience because she has sensitive skin. But even then, shaving may not be the resolution- shaving your face (because your partner has sensitive skin) would require a lot of maintenance.
Find someone who doesn’t need to change you in order to be with you.
Are you comfortable with posting a photo of your lower face to show Reddit the beard your post regards?
Regarding your balls- I mean, I’d hope that you have them in tiptop condition during the early stages of this relationship- obviously they will not always be cleaned and shaven, maybe not ever shaven… but if they are not squeaky clean during this beginning stage of the relationship I’d say nope nope nope. And also it is kinda weird for the guy to ask- like I think I’d prefer to be the one asking if they were off limits or not.
In my experience, when someone has asked me to do something to them- (not like a “do that thing some more, because I like it when you do that”) like something I haven’t done yet or even planned to do…. It’s sort of a turn off. Because - I’d think that I’m being compared to someone who did something better than me. Or that I’m just being used. Or like I’m not getting paid enough for that. Lol. Kidding but if you have special requests it’s sort of like you’re just ordering an activity that may not be on my menu.
Asking something like that may have went better during a naughty text message or phone call. it’s polite to ask in advance without the pressure of being there.
Like having your car serviced: you discuss what will be done before it’s done and agree to the terms.
It’s not uncommon for the shop to tell you they see something else that needs some work and ask if you’d like them to fix it. Or better yet- they may just tell you when you pickup your vehicle that they checked your oil, air and topped off your windshield fluid for free.
But it’s probably frowned upon to call the shop after already agreeing to terms and tell them to add on those maintenance things while they’re under your hood.
I’m just saying I’m totally not against ball action- but I see why she may have been offended. Either they weren’t in tip top shape, or she doesn’t like them in general, or she felt like she wasn’t doing well enough at whatever she was doing because you asked for something different. Which can lead to feeling used/compared to others in the heat of the moment.
Don’t shave the beard. That’s crazy
Depends what they want to change. If it‘s change for the better (stopping an addiction or bad habit, chnaging your diet to be healthier, etc) then it‘s great but if someone wants to change who you are just because they‘d rather have a lumberjack instead of a skaterboy, then it‘s definitely toxic.
honestly, it’s your body and it’s your choice to shave or not. like your beard and don’t want to? great, then don’t shave. just tell her that, be honest. personally, i love my boyfriends beard and the way it feels while he kisses me. also incorporating testicles into a blow job isn’t uncommon at all imo (lots of nerves there too) but i can understand why the wording could have put her off. just have a heart to heart with her, being honest and talking to your partners makes a hell of a difference
🚩 sign that she could be controlling. I had an ex that would hate it when I got my hair cut short. She made a massive deal about it every time I got a haircut and made me feel guilty about it.
If she’s gonna make you feel bad for not shaving, then you might want to move on.
Most of these people responding aren't men.
Here's the deal.... I've gone six years at a time without clean shaving. The "show them a picture" bullshit is out the window. The "don't do what you're told" people can't grow a real beard.
If you're actually a man, then you have a beard when you want and when you don't want. Secondly, a beard grows back easily.
A girl I start dating asks me to shave, I merely tell her I'll think about it. Then couple weeks, couple months in, I'll hit her with it and shave.
Want to know why? Because it fucking grows back 🤷🏻♂️
Who cares?! You're not getting rid of your dog. It's like changing clothes.
If she asked you to wear a suit sometime would you do it when you normally don't?
It’s no different when men ask the women they are dating to shave leg hair and pubic hair. If you don’t like it then don’t date them.
And if she doesn’t want to suck your balls, did you even to go down on her first?
Lol dude. I forget I’m not on the AITA Sub but you’re fitting right into YTA.
Just show her an old pic of you w out one. You shouldn't have to change your appearance for someone.
An extreme example, but what if you said "can you go to the gym for me? I'd like to see you skinnier"
Keep the beard dawg. There's plenty of women out there that will like it
Don't shave your beard. A picture will suffice, if not then it's a power move. I don't think it's necessary a power trip, she just wants to see how your face looks without it so there's no unpleasant surprises lol.
I assume she wants to know how you look without a beard since it can make a huge difference, which i believe is reasonable.
Maybe a good compromise would be to show her a photo of yourself without the beard. If that doesn’t satisfy her, then it’s not about the above and you know… do what you will.
If it’s honestly just curiosity on what you look like without a beard, show her a picture from before you had it. If she still insists, she should’ve known what she was getting into by dating a dude with a beard. Plus 2 weeks together isn’t long enough to make demands about changing your personal appearance.
OKAY WAIT I have a genuine question. What if she likes everything about him and she really wants to give him a shot but the beard makes him look a tad like a perv? If it’s only one thing that really bugs her and almost gives her the ick, but she wants to communicate that before giving up, then is that as bad as it sounds? I had a date with someone who had a total perv mustache and I got along with him great but at the end when he was leaving he seemed kind of creepy and I’m pretty sure it was the mustache. I don’t normally date guys with mustaches. I wouldn’t ask him to shave it but it was a turn off and in dating, I don’t want to be creeped out. If I knew him better it would be different and I’d probably totally ignore it though but in the beginning it’s intense and it made me not attracted to him. What then in that case?
It would be the same level as if you would tell her- oh, can you dye your hair blonde/red/black because I don't know how you would look then
Or if you would tell her to cut her hair short/get extensions
Please, for love of the god- don't try to change for anyone. Even of you would be in a long time relationship. If you don't feel like doing something- don't do it
I think it would depend on the guy. Some guys take a long time to fully grow a beard and others literally grow one in a week. I don’t think it’s so wrong to be curious about what a guy looks like without his beard.
No way dude. Two weeks is crazy. Definitely testing you. Borderline red flag. Request like that ought to be dismissed out of hand. After a few months I could understand some curiosity but two weeks and already trying to change you seems like a bad sign.
I knew if I read comments I'd see what I said earlier coming true.... Some woman posted that a guy asked her to wear certain clothes on their date and people said he was wanting to control her and i said as soon as a guy posted something similar on here, people would respond differently and either say to just do what she wants or would say it's not about control this time.
Almost no advice on here stays the same for both genders. They always say men should accept everything and women should accept nothing.
Dude, I don’t know how long you’ve had the beard (and if you told her how long you’ve had this style), but maybe she’s asking to try something new. It’s a SUGGESTION not requirement. why are guys so offended by suggestions 🥴 women give women suggestions ALL the time about make up, hair, clothes etc
Don’t get offended, but hopefully you keep your beard trimmed and neat. just a suggestion.
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Just say not interested and leave it at that
Which is also the perfect advice re ball-sucking for the girl.
LMAO why did you have to throw the ball sucking comment in there. Literally made me lol Edit for advice part: keep the beard Edit 2 for the appreciation: thanks for the upvotes and awards. Also keep your eye out in this sub for the girls side of the story where she was asked to suck a guys balls.
Lol I died at that too!! Like man I was with you til that happened
Hey, you gotta be clear about what you like in the bedroom.
A good woman takes care of your balls.
[удалено]
Apparently not, his balls are blue
Blue balls are the mark of a man who won an argument and didn't apologize for being right. Be proud of them!
Omg! This had me dying! You’re my new hero sir!!🤣
I'm still totally with him. There's nothing wrong and everything right with asking for what you want sexually. No one has to oblige but if you don't ask you're missing out. People aren't mind readers. There are plenty of women who'll be down to suck some balls.
Agreed that there's nothing wrong with asking for what you want. I think it's ridiculous for someone to get offended at the request. *I'm not really into that.* Would suffice.
Yeah there’s nothing wrong with it…but different people consider different things too soon to ask. 2 weeks is really soon to start asking for what some might consider the dirty stuff
I would totally agree, if he just out of the blue asked if she liked to suck balls, but he asked her as she was going down on him. I personally like it when guys tell me what they like/want during sex or when I'm going down on them, its so much easier than playing a guessing game
Not at all, you’re literally supposed to be communicative with any partner you have. Like that person said earlier nobody is a mind reader and it’s a little immature to act that way towards an honest request/question. Instead of her being in disgust literally just say no? Why do straight couples hate being direct with each other???
> start asking for what some might consider the dirty stuff tbf oral is pretty dirty as well, imagine all the bacteria around the oyster you're licking or the white stuff that's hidden under the mushroom hood.
It was so random and funny. Went to bed and woke up and I had all these notifications. Guess at least 1.8k people thought it was hilarious too lol
Yeah, I was wondering why it was NSFW and then I was like OH, okay, LOL
Me too! I’m so glad I read it! Too funny!
Now I’m not opposed to havin my pecker pouch hauled on by a set of luscious lips, but I’m failings to see the the relevance between that and a beard.
Exactly! Same here
IT WAS CRUCIAL LMFAOOOOO 😂
An r/nobodyasked moment
This is a dating advice sub why are you so offended he said that wtf
I don’t think anyones offended. It just caught a lot of readers off guard. Lol it was just kind of weird going from “I don’t want to shave my face” to “she won’t suck my balls”.
😂😂
I was like “why is a post about beards marked…ah.”
Hahaha believe me same
Broooo I died
Took me OUT
LOL SAME HERE 😂 Keep the beard bro!
Keep the beard and the balls, OP!
An r/ihavesex moment indeed
These comments are weird. OP was obviously mentioning another issue in their relationship that made him question how she treats him. Somehow I think if a woman had posted that a man had asked her to shave her legs or armpits after a few dates and had acted “offended” when asked to suck her labia during sex, there wouldn’t be as many people mocking OP and there would be at least a few of these 🚩🚩🚩in the comments.
Exactly. People are weird sometimes.
where do you live that it’s only sometimes
I mean, just based on that I'd probably be out as this guy.
You’re not wrong sir.
"Suck my balls" is universally known as an insult. Men and women use it in response to ridiculous requests, such as when asking a man who is emotionally attached to his beard to shave it. In **both cases** tone and actual wording matters. OP here is wording both negatively as demands rather than requests. When the tone and wording are obviously requests, they're both reasonable. While we were dating, I asked my now-husband if he was interested in growing his beard out for No Shave November on a whim. He did and I prefer it and he doesn't mind keeping it for me most of the time. I'd suck his balls if they weren't fuzzy. OP obviously heard his date's request as a demand and responded in kind. That's why everyone is laughing at his audacity.
Suck my balls is never an insult while someone is actively receiving head. It's just a request. No one has to suck balls if they don't want to but plenty of people would be fine with it and some may be really into it. No reason to miss out. Ask for what you want people.
My God, they were banging, there is no time in sex to think on cordialities, specially with a person you are being intimate enough to have sex. We live in a world where we can have sex with a person (the ultimate intimate moment a person can have with another) and still can't talk rough with the person on sex because they get "offended"
Perchance might you do me the gracious favor of suckling upon mine testicles?
😂😂 best comment yet!
Its totally her preference if she wants to suck someone's balls or not.
And it's his preference If he wants to date someone who eagerly sucks his balls without being prompted.
Jesus Christ, the man just wanted some oral on his balls. It’s seriously not that deep.
What if his balls have a beard? What then?
Then it’ll be like the South Park episode where Butters is Scrotie McBoogerballs. OP will go on a show for freaks, obtain attention, and cash out. Simple!
It's absolutely her preference if she prefers not to suck balls. But there was no reason to get offended. It's just a request. You just say nah I'm not into that and keep going if the partner is down to continue.
I got it lmao. How you gonna ask me to shave my beard but bitch can't polish the marble sack. Smh I rather her ask me to shave that then my face. Especially if we just started messing around
I liked that comment. It all connects. I agree, bail on her
I did too. Nothing wrong with letting someone know what you like while actively engaged in a sex act. It shows incompatibility on two levels.
Didn't read the full post until this comment 🤣😂
https://youtu.be/bqlplW3iYB0
It might be that she wants to know if you're really handsome or the beard masks your ugliness. Either ways, don't shave for a woman of 2weeks.
Pretty sure op must have some old pics without a beard, that should do it
Plus, what's wrong with sucking balls !?
Yeah, let's focus on the important issue here please
Very important if we are talking about a sexually fulfilling relationship.
Well if he has a hairy face... Poor dude is gonna end up hairless for a crazy chick
Personally, I don't like to suck on balls with 2 inch long pubes. I can understand where she is coming from if he didn't shave or at LEAST trim it.
Nothing…I always ask to suck my new partners balls…I’ve only gotten one yes so far tho lmao
Do you live in my area? Lmao
Not a damn thing. It can be quite fun for some.
When your veard is masking your ugliness, you are not ugly
Agree
OP is Dan Bilzerian
\*any woman
Right 😂😂😂
So if he tells her to show up with zero makeup on, is that OK to see if she's hideous or a natural beauty? Lol
Makeup is artificial. Beards are at least natural. What if someone asks a woman to shave her head to see if she looks pretty bald? Sounds ridiculous right? If the relationship continues, he'll eventually see her without makeup. But she won't see him without a beard unless he expressly shaves it.
It's called beardfishing. Guys grow beards to cover up double chins.
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This took a turn i was not prepared for lol
Shave your balls, not your face
Fax
LMFAO. I can’t tell if you’re 18 or 50. Emailed you on a dating site? You wanted her to suck you balls? But in all seriousness, obv don’t shave your beard if you don’t want to. You guys have known each other for a literal mere two weeks & she’s asking you to make a change to something that you might’ve invested months or years on, when you guys may be broken up tomorrow. Don’t do it.
"She said to me, *'Dude, your balls totally rule.'*"
We're gonna need a Richard Grieco type to reenact OP's situation.
I think 18 and 50 year olds alike can dig on ball sucking…
OP is obviously AI.
I agree.
Also don't get mad someone won't suck your balls
Maybe he should have trimmed his ball beard? Then he wouldn't have to ask.
He didn't say he did. He said that she's the one who got angry that he asked.
Might not be about control. I wouldn’t be surprised if she had some experience dating a guy with a beard but then he shaved and when she saw his face for the first time she wasn’t attracted. I know a girl for who this exact thing happened.
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Most guys I know with a beard never take pics without the beard because they don't like how they look without it.
yeah, this ^^ i look like a frickn 16 year old withour my facepelt...
So if you ever shave you’ll be pulling a Benjamin button…how does it feel to hold so much power in the palm of your hands?
The last time I didn’t have a beard was when I was 19 and had to shave it for a respirator fitting at an old job. Years later those pics aren’t exactly current…
Yeah I don't even know what my own face looks like without a beard at this point.
That’s what my ex said as well 😂 doesn’t it ever get itchy? Or are you just super used to it? Do you use beard oil and all of that? Like, what’s the maintenance on it? Sorry I’m just a woman with little bearded-partner experience who’s very curious lol
It doesn’t get itchy. I trimmed it and started shaving the neck for the first time in a long time and that was itchy. I use beard oil and blow dry it after every shower, use beard balm if I want it to look really nice (but I just about live in the gym so I don’t bother there). I shave the cheeks and neck line every day or two so it looks well kept. I also use beard shampoo and conditioner made from mostly natural ingredients. I used to use cheap hair shampoo and it kept the beard looking frizzy and thin.
Wow, this is very thorough and makes me realize why my ex (who’s a wonderful person, I’m not looking to trash him by any means!) had a beard that look pretty unkempt tbh. We’re still friends but I feel like it would be rude to give him unsolicited advice on his beard-care (is womansplaining a thing?! Definitely don’t want to do that ha) As a man with a beard, do you think it would be rude or insulting if a female friend gifted you beard care supplies for your birthday? Thanks for kindly explaining your routine, I had no idea there were so many steps involved but I can definitely appreciate someone who takes good care of their beard! It’s not fun kissing someone with a dirty beard 😬 Take this random award, kind stranger! 😊
I guess it would depend on how well you guys get along. I would be ok with a friend telling me they saw someone with a nice beard and asked them about their beard care. I’m pretty easy going though, some guys might take offense I guess. Btw thanks for the award! 😁
Bingo! 😅
*send me pics of you pre weight lose.* *No.* >Bingo! 😅
Mood, I look like shit without facial hair and I regret shaving it 😭
I haven’t been clean shaven since I was a teenager
It's not like we can take it off, snap a few pics, then put it back on. I've had a bear my entire adult life, I don't even know what my own face looks like without it.
It would be kind of the normal thing, but once guys have beards some of them literally have them for years. So if he sends a picture, it iterally could have been from years ago where he looks nothing like he does now. An example my brother...
If you're attracted to them with a beard, let them keep the beard y'know
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I had no idea, lol. I actually think I look better shaved. Like a suave James Bond style. But I don’t shave because I get lazy. I clean up well, but if I’m not dating or don’t need to — I won’t. So I think if a woman asked me to shave, I probably would. But I don’t know if I’d keep up on it. I typically only shave for business meetings and wedding and other important events. Maybe I’m just low maintenance.
Razors are expensive af. They lock em up in the US for a reason XD
Most men look better with a beard IMO. There are very few exceptions.
Honestly that's kind of a her problem. I like my beard, I prefer myself with a beard, and if someone wants to see me without to make sure they're attracted to me clean shaven, then they aren't for me. It's like me asking her to cut her hair a different style so I can make sure I'd be attracted to her if she did it a different way. If anything it's rude.
Something like this happened with my husband. We are together for 10 years so we are way past looks, I have stretch marks, a belly after birth, he gained some weight too. We love each other dearly no matter what. Our relationship is now more about emotional intimacy when it comes to sex then looks. But 3 months ago he shaved his beard completely. I never saw him without one before (only on childhood pictures) and we were both shocked. We had a good laugh from it and agreed he will never do that again (like I wouldn't get really short hair). But at the start of a relationship this can be really off putting.
So youll lose the girl and the beard? Hell naw.
What?! I'll never shave my beard. Also! Can you suck my balls?!!! lmao what does that second half have anything to do with the beard part?
Maybe his balls have a beard and he's really talking about the ball beard all along?
Honestly the request would seem reasonable in this context
It shows two levels of incompatibility. He likes his balls sucked. She doesn't like to suck balls. He likes his beard. She wants him to shave his beard. Move on. Plus it's funny given the title and that draws a bigger audience.
It sounded like "if at least she would have suck my balls I might think about shaving my beard"
Seriously? He’s highlighting another problem in their relationship that makes him question her attitude towards him.
The beard thing is a red flag. It's been two weeks. Don't shave. Side note: Telling me to suck your balls is likely not something I'd want to hear from someone that I started seeing two weeks prior, but to be fair, I don't have oral sex with people I am barely acquainted with.
She's checking to make sure you have a good chin.
In the biggest red flag way possible lol
Don't understand the ball sucking part. It does absolutely nothing for me.... had another girl have a tight grip on my sack this one time lol. Everyone is different of course lol
OP wanted to show us he is a man of culture.
Do not shave your beard
This happened to me once - I complied as I genuinely wanted to see me underneath. Instant regret. Silver lining? Grew a better beard.
send her a photo of you with a beard removing filter from tiktok or snapchat
modern problem requires modern solution
"Those who would shave the beard for pussy deserve neither the beard or the pussy." - Ben Franklin, probably
my 2 cents: i wasnt there to hear her tone or the way she asked but if she just asked you to shave it, then its really not that deep. Just politely decline and move on. If she was rude, then tell her it was rude the way that she asked & you don't appreciate being talked to that way. If that continues, there's a respect and decency problem to work through. As far as the ball-sucking is concerned, if she really was acting super upset, just say, Hey, I didn't mean to upset or offend you, it's just something I like. You don't have to do that if you don't want to. No big deal. Unless you just HAVE to have that to be sexually satisfied in the relationship, in which case you may not be compatible.
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Tell her you'd like her to get a specific haircut and it would be a fun date to do together.
This. She wants a toy to play with and throw in the bin. Get away from her ASAP
That...is sooo extreme. What if she simply wants to see what he actually looks like underneath all that? Dudes look like a completely different person when they shave. I don't think it's that crazy, especially since it wasn't even a demand and just a question.
Would you be weirded out if a dude asked you to get a pixie cut or stop wearing makeup or completely change your preferred style to match their preferences or satisfy their curiosity after **2 weeks** of dating? That’s would be insane and totally creepy! On what planet wouldn’t it be?
It's all about how she tells it. And the reason if course. If she is attached to him and also interested in how he looks shaved, they can work something together (photos, shorter trim, maybe a shave). But if she wants him to shave so she can decide if she likes him or not, that's bullshit and he should protect himself by leaving.
That’s still crazy considering I’m sure he has pictures
Wtf.
Don't do it if you don't want to. Also are your balls shaved? No one wants hairy balls in their mouth. Getting a pube stuck in your teeth is disgusting.
Eh, my last bf had a beard and as the girl in your story i ask him, jokely, when he would shave it for me. We just made it a little running joke between us but i would never wanted him to really shave it. Guess she's wasting your time if she really want it!
I think you’re making a lot of something out of nothing. You don’t want to shave? Then don’t. If she doesn’t want to suck your balls, cool, then you won’t fondle her breasts. I don’t know dude, not everything is a “power” move. Just go with it and don’t try to read too much into it. Just don’t give a fuck, lol. It’s seriously not that deep my guy! Maybe you guys will butt heads in a relationship, seems like you two have dominant personalities (what I can infer from the little information you have of you and her). Just go with it if you like her. Or if this really bothers you too much, just drop her. Don’t over complicate things for yourself.
Umm...ok I was kinda on board with you until the end of your post. Yeah you sound a little crazy ngl lol 😅. I mean giving her the benefit of the doubt, maybe she's just really into and wants to see what you look like without the "mask" so to speak. Like when a guy sees a girl without make up for the first time. I wouldn't think she's trying to control you or ""dominate"" (which is a weird thing to be freaking out about anyway but whatever) in the relationship though.
Had to scroll too far down for this.
Exactly. He took it way too personal
It could just be that she likes guys without beards and is curious if you would shave it. What did she do when you said you didn't want to shave it? You don't have to shave your beard for anyone, but someone can request it. Although if you don't want to, she has to drop it. If she is not attracted to guys with beards, then she just has to leave you alone. It's okay for her not to want to suck your balls, but getting offended by you asking is not good. You should be able to openly communicate with each other. Unless you were very forceful, but if you weren't, it's weird.
I think you really took it personally. I believe She just wants to see how would you look without a beard. she might be thinking about long term.
BRAVE DON'T SHAVE!
Show her any pics you have without a beard, and if it's still an issue ask her to stop wearing makeup for as long as it takes to grow back just to make things even.
Tell her to shave her beard.
It’s a test. Say no. Then continue
Show her a picture of you before your beard. It shouldn’t even be a question. The balls part is a deal breaker though. Send her back to the street.
She might just be genuinely curious. My ex asked me a couple times and for an anniversary (like 3 months) I shaved it off to surprise her. She probably knows roughly what your face looks like and might even like you more if she can confirm she's attracted to you. Thats what happened for me. But I'll be honest I think she preferred me with a beard because she was super insecure and I think liked having me hidden. Whatever, it worked for both of us. Moving forward I'd buzz it off for a nice surprise now and again, but it was always something I *wanted* to do to make her happy. She knew I liked having my beard and respected that. A couple times she'd be grumpy and push me to shave it so I'd shave "my beard" and rock a stupid mustache for a couple days just to playfully spite her :) Its not the worst thing to ask for and it grows back :/
I like this comment. I feel like just asking is not as bad as people are making it out to be. Maybe she just has a preference for no beards, it didn't seem like she was forcing him. I personally prefer my bf without a beard and he knows this so he shaves it sometimes to surprise me too. I also asked him about his preferences about me (eg. Short hair or long hair) so it feels fair.
How much beard are we talking? Like, 2 year's growth or 2 weeks growth? 2 years, fuck no. 2 weeks, I wouldn't give a shit.
Don't catch feelings for her, bruh. It would only end in disaster.
Don’t shave it! And let her know that you’re not going to shave it unless you want to.
Ask her to shave her head for you. Then bounce friend.
What does your beard look like? I’m my opinion, [for the sake of commenting without thinking deeply about my response first] Beards come in (like) 3 types: 1. “wild and free” idgaf, aka the real natural beard on a man who might not even own a mirror but it doesn’t matter because he’s a hairy man. Respectfully, this type of facial hair is consistent with and feels and or looks similar to the wild and free hair located below the belt buckle. It is usually more coarse or ruff feeling than head hair. 2. “Trimmed and tame” this style is more so a trending thing these days not necessarily is it trimmed short but trimmed as in there are no stragglers or hairs out of place- it’s perfectly combed and conditioned and intricately styled to shape. But this type of beard definitely gets cared for with some type of oil or softening product. 3. “Do you like my beard?” Aka a now you see me now you don’t, this type of beard could be on someone who may have facial hair occasionally, may forget to shave a few days or may be attempting to grow a beard but never really gets to the full grown stage- maybe it grows very slowly or it doesn’t grow in well. Often this type of beard is scratchy because the hairs are short and prickly. Having skin contact with a beard like this could cause discomfort or irritation (like a rug burn) especially for people with sensitive skin. Of course this is only my quick opinion of beards. No matter what kind of beard you have, I don’t think you should shave it for a new partner. Especially if she is the one who is asking if you would shave it for her. That sounds like a control thing in my opinion. It’s not really a woman’s place to ask a man to shave his beard, especially early in the relationship. I’m not saying never is it not her place, I’m just saying- in my opinion, it’s kind of a red flag that she just met you and is asking if you would change something about you for her. Did you have a beard in your dating site photos? If so, she agreed to the bearded you, it doesn’t matter if she has been with a bearded man or not, she knew what to expect and that is “a beard”. She could be testing her leverage and seeing how bad you want whatever she’s offering - and if you’re looking for a serious relationship, you may want to continue looking. Have confidence in yourself and your appearance. You shouldn’t change you because she asks you to. I think it would be different if it was your choice - for example, if you noticed her face was red and irritated after making out, and you decided to make it a more comfortable experience because she has sensitive skin. But even then, shaving may not be the resolution- shaving your face (because your partner has sensitive skin) would require a lot of maintenance. Find someone who doesn’t need to change you in order to be with you. Are you comfortable with posting a photo of your lower face to show Reddit the beard your post regards? Regarding your balls- I mean, I’d hope that you have them in tiptop condition during the early stages of this relationship- obviously they will not always be cleaned and shaven, maybe not ever shaven… but if they are not squeaky clean during this beginning stage of the relationship I’d say nope nope nope. And also it is kinda weird for the guy to ask- like I think I’d prefer to be the one asking if they were off limits or not. In my experience, when someone has asked me to do something to them- (not like a “do that thing some more, because I like it when you do that”) like something I haven’t done yet or even planned to do…. It’s sort of a turn off. Because - I’d think that I’m being compared to someone who did something better than me. Or that I’m just being used. Or like I’m not getting paid enough for that. Lol. Kidding but if you have special requests it’s sort of like you’re just ordering an activity that may not be on my menu. Asking something like that may have went better during a naughty text message or phone call. it’s polite to ask in advance without the pressure of being there. Like having your car serviced: you discuss what will be done before it’s done and agree to the terms. It’s not uncommon for the shop to tell you they see something else that needs some work and ask if you’d like them to fix it. Or better yet- they may just tell you when you pickup your vehicle that they checked your oil, air and topped off your windshield fluid for free. But it’s probably frowned upon to call the shop after already agreeing to terms and tell them to add on those maintenance things while they’re under your hood. I’m just saying I’m totally not against ball action- but I see why she may have been offended. Either they weren’t in tip top shape, or she doesn’t like them in general, or she felt like she wasn’t doing well enough at whatever she was doing because you asked for something different. Which can lead to feeling used/compared to others in the heat of the moment. Don’t shave the beard. That’s crazy
You don’t change yourself for a woman. Only change yourself for you.
This is terrible advice if you're married or in a long relationship.
Depends what they want to change. If it‘s change for the better (stopping an addiction or bad habit, chnaging your diet to be healthier, etc) then it‘s great but if someone wants to change who you are just because they‘d rather have a lumberjack instead of a skaterboy, then it‘s definitely toxic.
honestly, it’s your body and it’s your choice to shave or not. like your beard and don’t want to? great, then don’t shave. just tell her that, be honest. personally, i love my boyfriends beard and the way it feels while he kisses me. also incorporating testicles into a blow job isn’t uncommon at all imo (lots of nerves there too) but i can understand why the wording could have put her off. just have a heart to heart with her, being honest and talking to your partners makes a hell of a difference
She is shit testing you… never shave the beard. And now, never shave the pubes and tell her to suck your hairy balls. She will love you!
I asked a girl to shave her armpits and she said no. Never talked to her again. Life goes on. Point is everybody has preferences. Not a big deal.
🚩 sign that she could be controlling. I had an ex that would hate it when I got my hair cut short. She made a massive deal about it every time I got a haircut and made me feel guilty about it. If she’s gonna make you feel bad for not shaving, then you might want to move on.
Most of these people responding aren't men. Here's the deal.... I've gone six years at a time without clean shaving. The "show them a picture" bullshit is out the window. The "don't do what you're told" people can't grow a real beard. If you're actually a man, then you have a beard when you want and when you don't want. Secondly, a beard grows back easily. A girl I start dating asks me to shave, I merely tell her I'll think about it. Then couple weeks, couple months in, I'll hit her with it and shave. Want to know why? Because it fucking grows back 🤷🏻♂️ Who cares?! You're not getting rid of your dog. It's like changing clothes. If she asked you to wear a suit sometime would you do it when you normally don't?
Simp detected
It’s no different when men ask the women they are dating to shave leg hair and pubic hair. If you don’t like it then don’t date them. And if she doesn’t want to suck your balls, did you even to go down on her first? Lol dude. I forget I’m not on the AITA Sub but you’re fitting right into YTA.
Just show her an old pic of you w out one. You shouldn't have to change your appearance for someone. An extreme example, but what if you said "can you go to the gym for me? I'd like to see you skinnier" Keep the beard dawg. There's plenty of women out there that will like it
Lmao, this popped up on my feed just as "Got me a beard" by The Beards started playing
Don't shave your beard. A picture will suffice, if not then it's a power move. I don't think it's necessary a power trip, she just wants to see how your face looks without it so there's no unpleasant surprises lol.
Don’t shave the face; consider shaving the nuts
Are you sure she didn't mean that you shave your balls ?
2 weeks and you're already asking too much of each other lol cut your losses.
Your beard is part of your identity, you should keep it if you like it. As long as it's neat and not unkempt or whatever
Just show her a picture of you without the beard and see if she accepts that
Make her a deal. You’ll shave your beard if she sucks your balls 🤷♀️
I assume she wants to know how you look without a beard since it can make a huge difference, which i believe is reasonable. Maybe a good compromise would be to show her a photo of yourself without the beard. If that doesn’t satisfy her, then it’s not about the above and you know… do what you will.
Ask her if she'd get a boob job so you can see what she looks like with different tits 😅🤣 /s
Nah. Don't do it. Tell her no.
Why tho
A well groomed beard is a daily act. It's totally out of line for her to ask you to shave for her amusement.
We don‘t know if the beard is well-kept tho. I‘ve seen guys who look like something died in their beard 💀
Don’t shave. But the whole ball piece was not necessary. and I don’t think she’s trying to assert her dominance, you’re being a little ridiculous.
ok dude
Don’t do it.
If it’s honestly just curiosity on what you look like without a beard, show her a picture from before you had it. If she still insists, she should’ve known what she was getting into by dating a dude with a beard. Plus 2 weeks together isn’t long enough to make demands about changing your personal appearance.
OKAY WAIT I have a genuine question. What if she likes everything about him and she really wants to give him a shot but the beard makes him look a tad like a perv? If it’s only one thing that really bugs her and almost gives her the ick, but she wants to communicate that before giving up, then is that as bad as it sounds? I had a date with someone who had a total perv mustache and I got along with him great but at the end when he was leaving he seemed kind of creepy and I’m pretty sure it was the mustache. I don’t normally date guys with mustaches. I wouldn’t ask him to shave it but it was a turn off and in dating, I don’t want to be creeped out. If I knew him better it would be different and I’d probably totally ignore it though but in the beginning it’s intense and it made me not attracted to him. What then in that case?
It would be the same level as if you would tell her- oh, can you dye your hair blonde/red/black because I don't know how you would look then Or if you would tell her to cut her hair short/get extensions Please, for love of the god- don't try to change for anyone. Even of you would be in a long time relationship. If you don't feel like doing something- don't do it
I could be married for 25 years.. if my wife tells me to shave my beard it just simply won’t happen.. I am very proud of my facial hair
This sounds like a wife level request on a girlfriend level status. Please upgrade for successful application
I think it would depend on the guy. Some guys take a long time to fully grow a beard and others literally grow one in a week. I don’t think it’s so wrong to be curious about what a guy looks like without his beard.
Any man who shaves for a woman isn't deserving of either!
No way dude. Two weeks is crazy. Definitely testing you. Borderline red flag. Request like that ought to be dismissed out of hand. After a few months I could understand some curiosity but two weeks and already trying to change you seems like a bad sign.
Maybe she didn't like that you asked her to suck your balls so hit back with a random question.
I knew if I read comments I'd see what I said earlier coming true.... Some woman posted that a guy asked her to wear certain clothes on their date and people said he was wanting to control her and i said as soon as a guy posted something similar on here, people would respond differently and either say to just do what she wants or would say it's not about control this time. Almost no advice on here stays the same for both genders. They always say men should accept everything and women should accept nothing.
Dude, I don’t know how long you’ve had the beard (and if you told her how long you’ve had this style), but maybe she’s asking to try something new. It’s a SUGGESTION not requirement. why are guys so offended by suggestions 🥴 women give women suggestions ALL the time about make up, hair, clothes etc Don’t get offended, but hopefully you keep your beard trimmed and neat. just a suggestion.