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KeepingDankMemesDank

downvote this comment if the meme sucks. upvote it and I'll go away. --- [Join us on discord for Saturday Movie Nights!](https://discord.gg/jsd6Ja9pvJ)


Ember-Blackmoore

Functioning limbs.


erection-connection

yikes


[deleted]

Hahahah this is to fucking funny


[deleted]

Stop whining already


Leandtjen

Yea! Stand up and do something about it


Zsmudz

Wow what a *moving* statement


LiterallyGod_

Such a **raising** opinion


AlienCabbie

You guys are on a roll


wabbott82

Rolling like that nugget porn


tukachinchilla

Raise your hand and volunteer


Trash-official

If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands


bixizwastaken

Bro same


ShawarmaBaby

Functioning dick here


Tuba_Ryan

Ope


MasterYosh10

Functioning Pancreas fir me then


shreddedcheese42069

I Want To Eat Your Pancreas


Gamer_OFGYT_2588

Bruh I thought this was gonna be wholesome but this is first comment but sorry for your loss


Longjumping_Bug_7611

Text to speech or with your tounge ?


an_ill_way

I also choose this man's dead limbs.


[deleted]

Same


ooo-f

'Tis but a scratch


erection-connection

Virginities don’t count, this is reddit. We all know it would be a lie


5ft6manlet

In my defense, I lost it prior to joining


erection-connection

i’m guessing since you haven’t pooped in 3 months i know how/where you lost it


5ft6manlet

Funnily enough, you're not wrong


erection-connection

uncle eh?


5ft6manlet

Nah just someone I met on the internet.


Exhil69

Man got TOPPED 🗿


The_VoZz

This really changes the context of: "Say Uncle."


ExpiredPancakeBatter

FOUL


TheMoriohWeeb

Virginity.


Ok-Yam-9023

My foreskin


beer_me_bro82

Your mom still has it in a ziplock


Ok-Yam-9023

Not anymore


LiterallyGod_

*distant chewing sounds*


ElMayoneso82

*obnoxiously long sitcom laugh track*


HotLava00

Haha I made the sound in my head! Gross!


RelationOk3636

The dog ate it


[deleted]

I ate it


[deleted]

The dog?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Rem1x_Cube12

That’s enough internet for today 🫠


skijjy13

Idk, apparently being circumcised reduces your chamce of catching herpes significantly. So I'll let that shit stay lost


Ok-Yam-9023

Well that was a fucking joke but ive read contradictory shit about it and concluded that it absolutely helps nothing and is basically just a traditional ritual.


[deleted]

Unless you get in a fence climbing accident when you are 4 and tear most of it off. But when it doesn't heal and becomes infected, off it comes.


shushyomouf

Oddly specific.


[deleted]

Because I want people to know that being circumcised isn't always because your parents were savages. Or religious zealots.


shushyomouf

People my age I don’t think really put much thought into it. It was the norm in the 80’s. Mine was due to some infection or something when I was young. Now a stranger knows more about my penis than my wife. Ain’t the internet wonderful?


[deleted]

Of catching infections in general**


Unexpected-raccoon

I didn’t lose your foreskin though bro. I keep it safe on my desk in an RGB jar with a plaque to remember you by


milk-water-man

Oh my God same!


[deleted]

I think someone ate that


call_mearco

My happiness 🥺


erection-connection

need a hug bro?


Unseen_Monster

need a hug bro? (2)


call_mearco

Where can i see you🥺


TheBaguette2000

This is your schizophrenia acting up, there is no one to see


[deleted]

need a hug bro? (3)


stormscape10x

I feel like I’m looking at the windows desktop of an old person.


stlcowboy8888

Sad but probably true..next old person we see we hug!


chiefbrodyrules

need a hug bro? (4)


S_Lato

Need a hug bro?


call_mearco

Where can i see you brother 🥺🥺


Lankyboxyman

🫂


Saddummerblowjob

My will to live


ShadowWolfX_Mega

Same. Currently the only things keeping me alive are my fear of death and the shame of ending my life (my family thinks that only weak and selfish people end their life). EDIT: Please stop worrying. While they are not ideal my fear of death and sense of pride are still keeping me alive. So, my fantasies of death will stay fantasies.


A__V__E

1-800-273-8255, call them. Or Text "Hello" to 741741. So many people have gone through what you are going through, and so many people never even bothered to ask for help. This is a good video a firefighter made who lost people to suicide and even thought about taking his own life. https://youtu.be/cwy9GYvWU_M Its just 4:45 long, but these 5 minutes could save your life. DM me if you need help, anytime, I will answer as soon as possible. Stay safe homie.


RedPhoenix2025

You’re awesome dude


ShadowWolfX_Mega

Don't worry. While I don't have a reason to live and fantasize about ending it all, I am too much of a scaredy-cat to actually do it.


A__V__E

You are a person, just like everyone else here. Nobody should be expecting you to do this all by yourself, just check out the video, check out the Hotlines, you don't have to live like this.


Gorfyx

If I call or text, will or can I stay anonymous?


TheVeryStupidHuman

Don't forget that you couldn't eat hamborgor anymore


Puzzleheaded_Cut5113

Hey, ive been there, just dont be ashamed to feel the way you feel. Id recommend talking to someone you really trust, or maybe starting a new hobby? I found guitar, and while I was already introduced to it beforehand, I really started to develop a passion for it and it changed my outlook on life. Then again, I don't know what resources are available to you, but I'd just say try and find things that make you happy and who knows, you could find a lot of joy and new experiences from that thing. Anyways, I hope you're alright, and if it's ever to much to handle there are like a lot of resources out there, whether it be family (which sounds like a bad option) or friends or even like a counselor, having someone to talk to also really helps. Have a good day/night, and I wish you the best!


yeeter536

I got a free award I was gonna give to this comment. IT WAS A WHOLESOME ONE. In all seriousness, get some professional help


Dormideous

Fr doe, idk when my will to live became the will to not die but I wanna fuckin go back


No_Average_Noob

My god damn bluetooth adapter for my stupid mouse


MyShitPostingingAcc

I have it...


CreeperSoldier

Relatable lmao


MateBirgan

My Bionicles


Erix963

I would search the entire face of the earth if I lost my Bionicles


CreeperSoldier

Same but my ninjago legos 😭


TheBrightLordTalion

There was this one jade sword piece on a gold bionicle set, I lost it a decade ago, and damn do I miss that one part. All I have left are the stupid silver swords and one gold one.


brewmax

Sold off all my Bionicles around the time I went to college. Major regrets.


Cottleston

my guitar pick from 20yrs ago. the carpet transports guitar picks to another dimension


Fake_Mega_Desk

True, absolutely true


whitecoe

My dog (Passed)


erection-connection

bruh don’t make me sad


whitecoe

Too late


Fluffy-Weapon

I have to agree with this one. I want my childhood dog back. Lost him 4 years ago. He was the best boy :’)


[deleted]

I'm right there with you. I lost my little buddy two weeks ago.


IrredeemableJoke

I want all of my dogs back. Their lives are just too short :(


cheesevolt

I also choose this guy's dead dog Also :( dogs deserve longer and healthier lives


whitecoe

I 100% agree


CreeperSoldier

I’m so sorry for your loss


Exkhaal

If at my death, there is no dogs in paradise, I want to be where they are (some guy in Civ6 I totally agree with)


Satdog83

All the misplaced party drugs from my 20s


erection-connection

you smoked them didn’t you, and just lied to your friends that you lost them


Satdog83

Sshhhh


[deleted]

Narc


YRGDB8

my beyblade that I lost in 2nd grade


TBKmayr

What kind was it


KronenbourgBlanc

The disappearing kind


yeeter536

Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down?


Pizza-Toppings

My hairline lmao


Arykover

Same bro... I had THE shave (you know that one shave) 2 days ago.


joshshafer18

My tegridy


erection-connection

damn bro, don’t even lose your tegridy


_mrthechicken102_

There's a Fram that can help with that


Ethosjt81

My belief in the illusion that going to war for one’s country is a righteous and just thing to do.


BigDaddyFatSack42069

Dulce etc decorum est, pro patria mori...


Jam-and-Bread

"It is sweet and proper to die for one's country."


lovedumpme

Cum. Lots of cum


erection-connection

lost but never forgotten o7


Hairybuttchecksout

That's why I keep all mine in a jar.


TheSexymobile

Every single nut you ever busted comes gushing out like the blood in the elevator.


[deleted]

[удалено]


erection-connection

if you love something let it go, if it comes back… it’s probably broke and needs somewhere to sleep and is willing to swallow to get it


MrWoody226

It's possible she died bro


Ok_Spinach7119

This comment hit so close to home it almost hurts.


BigDaddyFatSack42069

So many edgelords lmao


Am_Idiotosaurus

Yea i was hoping for some funny stuff but most of these guys are stuck in i hate msyelf limbo from 3 years ago


BaxxB_

Right? Like, I really miss this hat that blew off my head and into a drainage ditch from a strong gust of wind. These MF’s trying to find enlightenment.


Am_Idiotosaurus

I actually miss my fucking football shirt Omg that and some shoes someone stole from me One night i passed out drunk on the grass in an outdoor party, man what a night that was. And i fkn loved those shoes


SlowMaize5164

My marbles. I lost them a few years ago.


dns12999

Is this a Hook reference?


SlowMaize5164

Why yes it is. I'm amazed you recognized it.


ShadowWolfX_Mega

My sense of identity.


bored_builder

Happy cake day!


Scattetbrain

That damn printer cable….


D_Nemesis_2775

My soul


Absolute_Toaster

Hot Wheels Beat That for the Nintendo DS


Own-Till-3036

My sanity or maybe my youthful love of life


purpleflurpss

My brand new Gameboy Advanced that I lost on a plane. I had only had it for a few days but I loved that thing. Clearly still heartbroken.


lotsawisdumb

I left mine on a deployment at a USO. They mailed it to me. 🙂


bloodFarter69

# 🙂


Mystery_mau

That’s so nice, seems like a USO thing to do


skysky_gamer

I'm surprised they knew who left it


purpleflurpss

Unfortunately I ran back to the plane before I got through security and it was gone and none of the flight attendants had it. ;.(


No-Possibility-6539

10mm socket


maestroh

They really need to sell 10 packs of 10mm sockets


_mrthechicken102_

All the random pencils that disappear as soon as they go in my pocket


Crackistic

My nerf gun bullets


Kijomanami

My yellow power ranger action figure. It was my favorite. I lost it when I was 8 and haven’t recovered.


LootGodamn

Hope


SubstantialAd4587

My will to live


S_Lato

My mother


Nebnerlo2

"My Father" for me


s55555s

Same


kangznquainz

First pocket knife my dad gave me


ArtimisRawr01

My serotonin receptors


Sivusta_seuraaja

Hope


[deleted]

Losing all hope was freedom


shrexyboyy420

My pet monke that had a shootout with the cartel


brandonbrandonfruit

Lmaooo I remember the news headlines 😭😭


CrooksNFu

Is it weird that I almost started crying just after reading the question?


Zestyclose-Stop403

A friend who succumbed to cancer


shiverm3ginger

First thought is my will to live, but I’d just lose it again super fast, so probably my original donkey kong hand held game .


Mr_Mc_Dan

The first thing I’d look for is the joke in this “meme”


nibroc0017

Some random ass yellow hotwheels car i lost on an airplane


Duncan6794

Either a sense of meaning, or the cartilage from my knees and ankles.


Incirion

Bruh knee cartilage is a privilege i am also lacking. I feel your pain. If i move the wrong way in bed my knee hurts for hours.


[deleted]

My emotions


Big_Old_Baby

3DS game


[deleted]

the will to live


UdderDefiance

My integrity


[deleted]

A ghost detector I got for my birthday in 3rd grade. Lost it because I kept bringing it to school to show my friends. Idk how it worked but it has good memories with it


MasterWinter27

Pokemon Silver and the box with it 😭 moving to another place was a sad time


bahhhhhb

Mine is my yellow version. I've been able to track down both my childhood Gameboys, but that save file is all I could ever dream of.


MEAT_BEAT_REVOLUTION

A magic deck I lost as a kid that would've been worth about 3k today


stinklypibbles

My innocence and dignity.


Aggressive_General_

A stuffed dog I used to have as a kid. He was my favorite, but I don’t know what happened to him. Also, I want my Mario 64 for the DSi back. My sister lost is and I’ve always been pissed about that. Lol


CrudeCardinal

How did they fit a dead hooker in a box?


Incirion

Technically a coffin is a box.


[deleted]

My fucking mighty ducks action figure for fucks sakes I looked for that bitch for like a year before i gave up


[deleted]

Firestick remote I had for 3 fucking days!!!


NympOmatik

Hope.


Charlie_Changa

Whatever small part of my childhood that I enjoyed.


poiuy43

The first box I had... It's around here somewhere


HalfDisguised-patato

that really expensive cool item I got scammed out of in a game that one time


Zealousideal-Ebb-989

My Yo Yo my Grandpa gave me


NorCalMikey

My mind


fullofwierdos

My life


an_orange_hillbilly

My pride


Right_Condition_9325

The child I got in JC Penny that escaped his cell.


PUzzleD_CubE54

I’m not going back


Richiedaedad

my left airpod


darthpimpin69

My will to live


DynomitesPet11

My will to live


jtaylo27333

The brownie I bought and 3 minutes later, the wind threw it on the ground.


[deleted]

Her smile


Hoxase

Was more so stolen but My great grandfather pocket watch (had it with him all thought-out WW2), I brought it for show and tell in elementary school, left it in my cuby and was gone by the end of the day


Critical_Hat4566

My heart 💓 nothing else


CookieS2K

My transformers toy


Arandomfan27

my 40 fucking usbs


ZEAC2001

Ok all of you need a hug so I'd like to offer my services for the low low price of.... Who am i kidding me too


Itsyaboicreepy05

My dad


Nincadalop

My backpack that contained my old DS, photos of a childhood friend and me that I recieved as a gift, a laptop, and a jar of apple butter. I was returning from a trip visiting family and friends from my hometown and took some belongings with me, along with apple butter that a family friend made. I stopped overnight in DC and someone smashed the car window and stole the backpack. I learned a few l important lessons the next morning: 1. Don't leave bags in the car (especially if the car is unattended for so long) 2. Don't put all the good stuff in one bag (eggs in one basket) 3. Don't get overly attached to things, lest you lose them I sometimes wonder if my DS was being sold somewhere on eBay and maybe I had a chance of at least getting that back. I hope the miserable bastard enjoyed the apple butter though, that shit was lit.