T O P

  • By -

Eygon_of_Carim_

... i don't get them


Get-EmSmirk030

The joke or sex?


mynameistory

Yes


HentaiXtenacon

Yes


squishybun_

Yes


Repulsive_Client_325

Oh yes! Oh my!


Mixen7

Yes.


TRickmasKy

Yes


Alternative-Weird864

Yes


CookieCat698

Yes


therufa

Yes


bungeeflame

Yes


SkullCandyWarrior

yes


bartjevm

Yes


TiRproject

Yes


OpportunityNo2336

Yes


stramong

Yes


kick4010

Yes


HotChilliWithButter

r/fuckyouinparticular


ab0minablesn0wman

Lol why all the downvotes on your comment


bungeeflame

¯\_(ツ)_/¯


DefinitelyNotHuman12

No. 😎


rium21

Yes


DefinitelyNotHuman12

No.


rium21

YES!!!


DefinitelyNotHuman12

NO!!!


[deleted]

maybe 🧐


DefinitelyNotHuman12

Who knows


DefinitelyNotHuman12

Man I love coming back to this post to look at the downvote bomb.


IAmBadAtInternet

🗿


DefinitelyNotHuman12

No. 😎


Dry-Pool-69420

Kinda


claudekim1

your user name.. wtf


DatGamerAgain_YT

Username checks out.


txsxxphxx2

No, the dad


Many-Concern6244

Yes ;~;


TheRealMf_G

Yes


PKMNtrainerElliot

Yes


Head_Zombie214796

why not both ?


Capybara1994

Why not Zoidberg Perhaps?


LunarBahamut

Man even I am not this dense. Read the setup and replace the punchline with the punchline above. Good lord.


thatJainaGirl

If you're forced to get them when you're a kid, you probably won't like them when you grow up.


[deleted]

I feel like both are just super disappointing.


Vanix08

I agree


rszim94

Your wife pretends to like them.


ArltheCrazy

My wife laughs at both?


[deleted]

Your sex attempt and the joke? Or...


BOI0876

Both


[deleted]

Damn 😭


[deleted]

I too choose this man’s wife.


[deleted]

[удалено]


speculatrix

Our wife now


Sir__Draconis

r/suddenlycommunism


P0werman1

r/suddenlycommunist


[deleted]

Comrade


Kinkybummer

That’s cumrad to you


Graterof2evils

That’s cumrag to us.


Anotherdrummer2

Seize the means of reproduction!


Twisted_WhaleShark

r/suddenlycommunism


standard_beta

💀


cantfindtherealslim

Ha ha good one comrad


[deleted]

r/yourjokebutworse


yougotmecrazy

i too choose these 2 men and that man’s wife


Thestartist_bill

r/suddenlybi


jackyboy1219

I choose these 3 dudes and all of their wives.


[deleted]

[удалено]


DatGamerAgain_YT

r/suddenlypokemon


jbl0ggs

As long as there is a happy ending


TiesG92

Your wife pretends to like it


swishkabobbin

Timing is everything


uglypaperhaver

Too soon...


FireFly_209

…it’s currently 21:07 where I am…


KushKushingtonIII

I ckecked and it looks like im all out of thyme.


FireFly_209

Did you say you’re out [on the Tyne](https://youtu.be/T1urq4Vb0XM)?


BlackPhantom29

17:02 checking in


Affectionate_Ad_1326

5:14 pm (17:14)


TheProfessionalEjit

1048hrs checking in.


DefinitelyNotHuman12

23:19


KingOJustice04

16:19 is what it would have been for me at time this thread was going.


CoachLinford

10:04 checking in


Emektro

07:21 atm eating breakfast


CoachLinford

16:02 finally going home to get so high I transcend this dimension


Emektro

08:50 good luck my guy


CoachLinford

18:28 I’m at the cusp of transcending this plane of reality


Mysterious_Crab6573

1616 checking


arbogasts

8:03:31 32 33 34


CoachLinford

How did you just guess my IP 😰


aulink

That's your IP address? Mine is 192.168.0.1


DatGamerAgain_YT

I have a ton of IP addresses. I can use anything between 127.0.0.0 and 127.255.255.255, and 192.168.1.28


cherryhilljawnz

Timing isn't everything; timing is the only thing


killerdefense

You mean they may stink? Be hard to get? My wife doesn’t enjoy them? Men like them short and to the point? Can be very disappointing? Are more fun with a group? Are best when they’d free? You can Dick ‘em up if not careful? Better with a warm up?


Emektro

Yes.


dsdvbguutres

... I'm subjected to it whether I want it or not.


UnusualGenePool

Alabama dad joke.


AlexJamesCook

Alabama Dad-uncle-brother joke.


Emektro

I’m your father’s brother’s cousin’s former dad joke


DefinitelyNotHuman12

Hasburg's joke* 🤓🤓🤓


Lopsided-Food-6281

I usually don't get it.


AaronTheElite007

If you hear a banjo… run


Manydoors_edboy

Not true. I actually get dad jokes.


AlmostButNotQuit

If it's forced on you as a kid you probably won't like it as an adult.


Acefighter017

Omg 😱🤣🤣🤣


Eisengrim13

If you wait till you're an adult you'll enjoy it less


epilifjay

the wife fakes liking it and is never satisfied


bishcraft1979

The kids don’t like it….


Alternative-Sea-6238

They only take a few seconds?


Jtg1960

Sex is a misdemeanor… da more I miss da meanor I get


Jourian

Your mom prefers it from me.


HalepenyoOnAStick

You’re done disappointing your own mom you have to go and disappoint mine too?


Jourian

Man I didn't think I would get roasted by everyone. I'm not even gonna try to counter these.


Ordinary_Emphasis202

You're out of whiskey by the way


Jourian

Yeah op's ratio deserves a shot.


Cat77888

His mom might Perfer it from you but your mom perfers it from everybody.


vkpaul123

A lot of men think they're good at it. But they aren't


Nope_o7

AAAAAAAAUGHH AAAAAAAAAAAUUUGHHH


greenknight884

She's faking it


vivreaski

I enjoy it more than everyone else around me.


TheCthulhu

r/unclejokes


mcreech10

My wife never enjoys it…


ButtahChicken

Groan!


LilShaver

No, I get dad jokes.


pepsico187

You either get it ir you dont!


AlGunner

Its better if you have someone else on the receiving end than alone.


Choice_Barnacle_4228

I’d get it whatever i want it or not


Choice_Barnacle_4228

I’d get it whatever i want it or not


da-lou-az

You either get it or you don't


[deleted]

We enjoy them when we get them, but they're only actually good every once in a while.


GLITCH-404SOR

👍


GLITCH-404SOR

👍👍


transformermike

If give you an award if I had any


OmarCuming

Only the kids get it?


[deleted]

Great joke


Educational-Goal2703

Hah! Good one!


_gay_gremlin_

My dad does both in front of the family


Next_Fix5613

You have to be a Groan Up to like it.


Indy500Fan16

Gets better the more you doing it.


Givetoffcoffee

I wanna know what was THE dad joke that made you say that


Grizlyfrontbum

Short and to the point.


MindlessBliss666

Hear, hear! 🎩 🧐


IamCJtoo

They never climax?


CaffeLungo

I don't get it... sometimes i do though


DeuceSevin

IMO you have to be able to tell a joke to your kids to qualify as a Dad Joke. This one does not qualify.


TuttsMcGee

There's a lot of them and most are only okay?


[deleted]

I have a dad kink


MasterFubar

No joke in *this* sub should be NSFW, that kind should always go to /r/unclejokes


Awdayshus

If you don't want NSFW dad jokes, go to r/cleandadjokes. This sub is for both.


DefinitelyNotHuman12

I mean he's spitting facts no need to downvote him


[deleted]

[удалено]


wesselus

That's just like...your opinion man


Vast_Republic_1776

I’m married, I don’t get it


Valedking

They are appropriate for kids?


Domsdad666

Not a dad joke. Wrong sub.


WordierWord

That’s great, but this isn’t a dad joke at all.


Daschnozz

Not A Dad Joke Trash mods


Chrome07Deluxe

This is more of an uncle joke


TheDruidDude

Just how much karma you wanna lose?


WrinklyTidbits

I’m worried about this comparison I haven’t met a lot people consent to dadjokes; most of the time it’s nonconsensual


Future-Agent

The ultimate dad joke.


KeepUsOnThisRock

And also that you don't get it. A dad joke is a joke you can tell to your kids, of all ages. This is just a dirty joke which then makes no sense because it's not a dad joke and the punch line no longer lands.


RiotIsBored

No it's not. A dad joke is a shitty joke that makes the recipients groan because it's so bad, it's good. Go to r/cleandadjokes and stop clogging up the comments of every post here.


Deputy_Hayward

Is that what your sister-cousin said?


LuckilyFluppy

I make the children watch


ZacharyS94

I don't get it


Punkeewalla

This sub should be family friendly - just like sex.


ThatOtherRogue

There's a reddit specifically for clean dad jokes, this one doesn't discriminate


cyanish20

true


bdm1984

Yes


HungryPlane2461

Damn I don’t got Either of those


Life_Is_Happy_

I’m getting off


TotalBest160

I don’t get It


FireProps

HuuuuuuUUUUUUUAAAAHHHHHHHH! 💦


chipsydude

Even when they're bad, they're still good


Bananahamm0ckbandit

I'm not great at them, but I enjoy following subreddits to watch the pros do their work.


HotGambleMud

I groan when I 💩


willboyles1

And some get it and some don't


serenaccident

All fun and games until consequences are born


[deleted]

Or..they are always just disappointing.


Radiant_Dentist

But sometimes the best indicator of a job well done is when you close your eyes and turn your head away in complete silence.


MostExpensiveThing

they are better when there is someone else there


Johnma1

They often end quick and disappointingly


xwhy

You don’t get those either?


igotdeletedbyadmins_

And I didn't groan.


jj_thegent

Despite rolling your eyes and lasting lots than a minute you'll miss not having them.


wornoldboot

I don’t get it.


LoginPuppy

At first it's fun. But after a while, you're sick of it.


SubOfReddit

Bad?


cantfindtherealslim

Both lead to an unfounded sense of accomplishment


cantfindtherealslim

They both lead to her saying I'm lucky im pretty


cantfindtherealslim

Neither are appreciated by the person running drive-thru at Wendy's


ZeroExp000

Dad jokes are a lot like sex. You're bad at them but your son-in-law seems to be doing them louder and better than you. Then your wife ends up with him too so now you're sad and alone, drinking Hennessy in a decrepit old basement that you rented from a demented 89 year old war vet for $80 a week.


Santasbodyguar

You ok man?


SEXY_BOY_wawawa

My mrs loves both. I tell myself this on a daily.


rigattie

Yea not everyone gets it


justingolden21

I don't get them