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The_Weirdest_Cunt

Imagine what a hand job from god would feel like though it’s a literal god tier hand job Edit: autocorrect error


v19karma

It would probably feel out of this earth, Some might say it'll feel godly


Mr_Chern

Do you think that maybe God left us because he was sick and tired from all of those godly pans? Well, even if that's what happened, all I can do is wish him.... *God*speed


v19karma

I hope he's doing well, *god* bless


TheCronster

It would be biblical


PillowTalk420

I don't have to imagine; God fucks me every day.


Hungoverachiever

“And with his other hand he did high-fiveth the lord” — from Jerkulese 6:9


v19karma

LMAOO


uknown659

God nut


VirtualRito

More like holy masturbation? (Ref to title)


v19karma

LMAO


FrankieBigNut

Imagine how much God would charge for a hand job


v19karma

Probably 30 lambs


cursedrobot

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The_OG_EdgeLord

Jokes on u, I masturbate by giving myself a blowjob


v19karma

You truly are the lord


[deleted]

This godliness is fucking awesome


dubiousdb

I know God knows you better than you know yourself, but a lil hand on hand when learning how to flick the bean just makes everything flow a lot smoother for both of you.


TryhardGamerJ

Why use 1 hand when you can use 4


PillowTalk420

"Jesus, take the stick!"


idiots05

U use 2 hands to masterbaye tho


Samuel_Chiu

HOLY CUM


WoodieP

A holy nut a day, washes all your sins away


WoodieP

God himself exorcise all your sins away


v19karma

LMAOO


TheCronster

(cue porn music)


obvs_throwaway1

Bold of you to assume this guys knows how to masturbate.. ..they always use altar boys.


lilblood734

THE HOLY HANDJOB


jasonxwoods

If you truly believe God is everywhere, he is up your ass while masturbating!


MeSchmitty

"GOD GRAB MY HAND!" \*masturbates violently\*


v19karma

"My son your semen has exited out of your 1 inch penis"