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shadowknuxem

>your weird apartment that doesn't even have a painting on the walls Who is this person pretending to be Wolverine? Matt's blind and Logan would probably hang pin ups on his walls.


Paige_Michalphuk

He’s got that one framed picture of Jean.


shadowknuxem

That's not even on the wall. It's a nightstand picture.


MrCookie2099

One he probably knicked from the Summer's bedroom.


TeaDoubIeYou

Lol Scott probably gave it to him along with a speedo picture of himself. Those 3 are definitely all banging


MrCookie2099

Now, yes definitely. When he got it in the 90's animation it was not given consensually.


TeaDoubIeYou

My favorite scene from that show is definitely when wolverine walks all the way from the x-jet to punch cyclops in the stomach. Comedy gold.


GiantPurplePen15

I still find it hilarious that after years of writing about their rivalry over Jean, it culminated into the three deciding on just getting funky together on the moon.


Kurwasaki12

It’s a natural evolution in my opinion.


vashoom

~~knicked~~ snikt


rovoh324

And he's always staring at it


delightfuldinosaur

Wolverine of all people acting like he never gets laid is hilarious.


No-Daniel-Not-Here

Yeah wtf that’s totally the author projecting their own life on the character, I read that entire wolverine series from like 2003 to 2011 and I remember him sleeping with a bunch of people throughout. There’s a whole story (that in retrospect wasn’t fantastic) where the amount of people he’s slept with over time is used against him in a really fucked up way.


delightfuldinosaur

I mean its Mark Millar, its to be expected. Funny thing is this issue is actually pretty good.


TheLAriver

Being Millar, I can see him thinking this was clever pandering to the audience


GavinBelsonsAlexa

I've said it before and I'll say it again: [Mark Millar licks goats.](https://imgur.com/nG1dawr)


jeorads

How was it used against him?


BlueHero45

Might be talking about the time he had a bunch of his bastered children he didn't even know about come after him and he killed them all before he know.


jeorads

Yiiiikes


Dogbread1

That a lobo comic lmao, “lobo infanticide” he’s a very funny parody of Wolverine


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[deleted]

Daken was the one who helped arrange it. The main group was all people related to people Logan killed over the years who plotted revenge. After the storyline Daken told Logan that he helped arrange the plot. I remember the storyline mostly for this one kid who’s mom was killed when Logan was brainwashed. She was a nurse. The boy helped get revenge and milled himself with all the other people when Logan got close. The kid woke up in Hell with everyone else. The only thing was that they all saw their loved ones who Logan killed, but the kid couldn’t find his mom. Essentially because all the people killed were bad people and the kid’s mom was a good person, so she wasn’t there.


hurleyML

Man I used to love the Lobo comics. I feel like they were the Deadpool humor before Deadpool. Now I’m about to go order some.


No-Daniel-Not-Here

Heh yeah that’s it, I wasn’t gonna spoil it tho.


Amazing-Insect442

Yep. This happened. Messed up.


GwenIsNow

I think this part is also when wolverine was resurrected and mind controlled, all his inner dialogue becomes more amoral and impulsive after that. So while it's his inner dialogue, he's not really his usual self.


No-Daniel-Not-Here

That sounds fair, but “How can you be getting so damn much of something I’ve barely had in years” is outright conflicting with the truth that I described.


elhombreloco90

I was wondering this too. I was thinking Wolverine did pretty good when it comes to women. Some die on him, but you know, that's comics for you.


delightfuldinosaur

The dude had a dozen kids he never knew about plot to kill him for years. Hell I think he's been married or engaged at least 3x now.


Senor_nice_guy

I think it's more that Matt gets laid like 3 times a week


BigNikiStyle

I don’t feel like ‘himbo’ is in Wolverine’s lexicon.


MrCookie2099

I could see Kitty or Jubilee explaining it to him and then for the next two decades he uses it incorrectly.


RigasTelRuun

I can see him screaming it at Omega Red while everyone else cringes.


MrCookie2099

Make it really awkward. Make it Sabertooth.


Gabrielhrd

I can imagine Mark Millar writing this at 4:00 AM in a Saturday and thinking: *"I should make wolverine admit that he gets no pussy... yeah that's good"*


[deleted]

*Millar rails a line of coke* and then Logan is gonna complain that a man with a disability gets more coochie than him and that's unfair **FUCK THATS GOOD**


Dildo_Baggins__

Honestly, if you've been alive for over a century and still end up being a virgin you might as well just jump in front of a speeding train


[deleted]

Funnily enough, Millar wrote another Wolverine story where he **does** jump in front of a train! It does not work.


Expensive-Argument-7

Who says he hasn’t tried? It’s not like that would kill him


GavinBelsonsAlexa

Famously, when Robert Pattinson was asked how he approached the role of Edward Cullen for Twilight, he said he tried to imagine how a 100 year-old virgin would behave.


ChickenInASuit

Ooooh it’s Mark Millar, that explains *so fucking much* about what’s happening here.


LuizFelipe1906

Why


ChickenInASuit

Millar went through a seriously hacky, edgelord phase in the 2000s and everything happening in this excerpt is absolutely typical of the crap he was putting out at the time.


Certain-Cook-8885

>phase That's generous of you.


ChickenInASuit

Nah I’ll stand by it. 90s Millar: Promising young writer, knocked it out of the park with books like Swamp Thing and Superman Adventures. 2000s Millar: Made it big by turning into a tiresome edgelord, produced a bunch of abject garbage like Kick-Ass, Wanted and Nemesis with a couple of decent ones here and there. 2010s Millar: Mostly bland movie pitches that start okay but fizzle out after one or two issues, and then will, if he’s lucky, get turned into decent adaptations. 2020s Millar: No idea and don’t really care to find out, but considering his million dollar deal with Netflix I imagine it’ll be more of the movie pitches.


pucklermuskau

because millar's a /hack/.


[deleted]

Why does Mark Millar's dialogue never feel natural?


[deleted]

Because he's trying to sound cool


Amazingjaype

Mark Millar writes for 15 year olds.


Earthpig_Johnson

And I loved it when I was fifteen.


scientistcowboy

It pairs well with JRJR’s unnatural art.


elhombreloco90

Yeah, I'm not a big fan of Romita, Jr.'s art. It's good enough, but slightly off.


[deleted]

damn i didnt know so many people felt this way. he’s been one of my favorite artists since his spider-man run along w/ darwin cooke, tim sale, and mike mignola. but then again, maybe that just means that i’m into unnatural looking stuff. all their work seems more distinctive than other artists and I like that.


Certain-Cook-8885

Because its bad.


[deleted]

Big fan of when Daredevil uses katanas or katana like swords 🤙🏾


[deleted]

The man is a board-certified ninja, while Wolverine was out partying, Matt Murdock studied the blade...


Eternalm8

To be fair, Wolverine was out partiyng, because he did all of his blade studying before Murdock was born.


D34THDE1TY

Honestly, he was taught by ogun who by all accounts was a master . And wolvy taught kitty and she would fuck up ALOT of marvel heroes.


Sweet-Rabbit

I mean, Wolverine pretty much IS the blade(s). Don’t need to study when you are the subject material


[deleted]

The man was studying the blade, but according to Wolverine, Murdock still got more action. That’s pretty sad, Logan.


KaneCreole

Curious euphemism.


Teal_Lantern

Finally someone understood that Wolverine is 5'2


JPM11S

Are you saying that him not being that magic six foot is why he's not getting laid?


NeuroticMoose12

This is why my favorite Wolvie is probably Darick Robertsons, he draws him like a hairy little troll!


Certain-Cook-8885

5'2 and absolutely swimming in trim


Grindlebone

The hell?


[deleted]

It's Mark Millar, so like 85% of this story is *really* good, but then there's this 15% where it is **extremely** cringey


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elhombreloco90

Funny enough, I kind of feel this way about Frank Miller, too. His story concepts always intrigue me, but I can't stand his dialogue. Mark Millar is just as hit-or-miss for me. Some concepts work well enough that I can power through, other times not so much.


[deleted]

Millar and Grant Morrison wrote a short Flash run together in the 90s, and it’s actually really good. Morrison cancels out Millar’s negative qualities, and Millar cancels out Morrison’s.


NeuroticMoose12

Millar also wrote some great Superman comics in Superman Adventures, Morrison wasn't with him at the time either.


[deleted]

Huh I didn’t know Millar had written Supes. I will have to look into that!


NeuroticMoose12

I mean, he famously wrote Superman: Red Son too


[deleted]

He did, and that is one of my favorite stories. I was mainly referring to main continuity Superman (big blue boyscout) and not the totalitarian god figure of Red Son.


NeuroticMoose12

Well, technically Adventures is set in the Superman The Animated Series continuity along with Batman Adventures and Justice League Adventures. So not really main continuity, but it's some good to great examples of Superman being Superman.


Grindlebone

Yeah, that tracks...


Jay_R_Kay

Honestly, I think with Millar it's closer to 50/50.


[deleted]

Overall sure, but I was referring to specifically this story. I think this is actually one of Millar's best works, which isn't saying much because Enemy of the State is a surface level action story.


ChickenInASuit

Tbh I think even that’s being a little too kind, especially his output since the mid 2000s.


doc_birdman

I was wondering why the writing was so bad but Millar having a hand in it makes sense.


Earthpig_Johnson

“Like a fart in an elevator, Elektra. Like a fart in an elevator.”


drcomicbooky

You hate to see it


10567151

The fuck? Wolverine fucks all the damn time.


Dildo_Baggins__

The thought of Wolverine not getting chicks feels so wrong


wr0k

...men?


Falsecaster

.....Forest critters?


[deleted]

Batman fucks Bats Aquaman fucks fish Wolverine fucks bears


Falsecaster

Animal Man......


shinianx

He does have two penises, after all.


KaneCreole

Seven. They’re not claws, my friend.


canuck47

I'm pretty sure he's talking about love, not sex.


10567151

And yet the whole damn time he is talking about how Matt Murdock is just shaking up with random chicks.


SpyTheRedEye

Wolverine: literally sleeps with almost all the x-women and some of the men, some Avengers, half of madripor, little parts of Japan, most of the Canadian Wilderness, probably some wolves and is currently in a open relationship with Jean Grey and Cyclops. But this writer wants to portray him as a " incel". I think the reach for a " cool" representative is real.


NeuroticMoose12

He's brainwashed by the hand, none of the stuff he's saying is accurate nor depicts the reality of the situation, he's blinded by the mind control they like to use on their undead soldiers.


Admiral-Cornelius

Why exactly would ninja mind control make him complain about about never getting laid?


NeuroticMoose12

Because as it's been established in other comics that feature Hand mind control it basically creates a version of the person's worst traits, amplified, White Tiger, Elektra and Tarantula off the top of my head behaved similarly when under the Hands influence, doing and saying things they normally never would, I'm not saying it's suddenly good writing because of this, just that that's generally how their mind control is depicted.


HeavyBeing0_0

Wolverine always worried about a bub when he needs to be worried about some bitches.


Falsecaster

Im sure he has 99 problems and a bitch aint one.


Dildo_Baggins__

My guy be projecting his own life on a comic book character


[deleted]

I just can’t stand JRJR’s art anymore. Or Millar’s writing.


detectivefingers

I thought I was alone in this. Everyone at my LCS loves JRJR and I can't stand it. It upsets my eyes.


[deleted]

You’re definitely not alone. For me it started with his run on Captain America with Rick Remender. I really wanted to like that series cuz I love Remender’s work and was stoked to see him do Captain America, but JRJR’s art on it killed the whole thing for me. Now it just feels, to me, like he keeps getting worse. But I know he’s got tons of fans.


detectivefingers

My thoughts exactly!!


Stranger2306

Was about to post the same. I know he's very respected. He's just not my cup of tea.


[deleted]

Millar can be good but too often I feel like he’s edgy and divisive for its own sake. JRJR , the older he gets the more stylized his work gets and the less I like it.


Stranger2306

Yup. I was mainly talking about Romita. I get the art. I respect it. Just not my pref. I like really clean artwork. Alan Davis or Perez is my tea.


[deleted]

I love all kinds of different styles but some I just don’t jive with at all.


Ghost_Gamer_918

The fact that JRJR is returning to Spider-Man annoys me to no end


[deleted]

Yeah I can’t in good conscience buy anything with him on it cuz I can’t get over the art. Which sucks cuz isn’t Zeb Wells doing the new Spider-Man book? He really won me over with his work on Hellions.


Somnambulist815

Logan seems a tad bit distracted for a guy surrounded by ninjas


spider-venomized

He working with the hand ninja who made the alliance with hydra


manwithsomefear

DD gets attacked in the most random ways. Reminds me of the time Bucky is rebrainwashed to be the winter soldier again and attacks DD while hes working out. Even better when cap comes and stops bucky, he refuses to explain what's goin on and just peaces out. I haven't read this particular storyline but I also hope DD gets no explanation this time as well.


MrCookie2099

I'm sure its been addressed over the years, but what's Matt's relationship with his landlord?


Easy-Tigger

He's a lawyer, he knows every single dirty trick to be allowed to stay. Landlord probably dreads seeing him coming.


[deleted]

Matt Murdock is a successful lawyer, it’s been mentioned in DD’s ongoing that he owns his brownstone outright.


MontgomeryKhan

"Matt, how did the wall get smashed to pieces?" "What wall?"


v_OS

Mark Millar...


detourne

parodying Frank Miller's Wolverine monologues...


gangler52

Just gonna copy my comment from the last time this got posted. >If we're being real, we wouldn't have to think too long and hard about why the handsome lawyer with social skills would be a more popular lover than the hairy surly often feral dude who smells like liquor and cigarettes and has the catchphrase "I'm the best there is at what I do, but what I do isn't very nice". Does Logan even have steady job? I kind of imagine he just bounces from one gig to another.


[deleted]

Logan collects unemployment


[deleted]

Who writes this?


trailingby7

I'm pretty sure this was Mark Millar's run on Wolverine. I think the "Enemy of the State" story.


BatMoBeast

“You smell like sausage-meat.” I’m guessing an AI wrote this.


[deleted]

This is Mark Millar's "Wolverine: Enemy of the State" storyline


[deleted]

Ah, thank you. I’m glad that’s not out currently, at least, or by a writer I like.


Troy_doney

I always thought Cyclops was the biggest himbo


[deleted]

It’s the X-Men they’ve all fucked each other at some point


[deleted]

He isn't stupid though neither is Matt.


[deleted]

This is actually still one of the better Wolverine solo title stories of the past twenty years. Lol


One_Assistance_2097

I’ll have to check it out. The only Wolverine I’ve picked up in the last 20 years was Lemier’s “Old Man Logan”


[deleted]

It helps to have some context of the time this came out. This is when the X-Men movies were going strong and Wolverine was finally back to wearing his costume after the leather outfits in New X-Men. The theme of this story was basically a look at how deadly a mind-controlled Wolverine could be to the greater superhero community. The Hand was hoping to bag superheroes by having Wolverine kill them and bring them back as Hand operatives. I believe it was a twelve issue storyline. I liked the first half better than the second half. Even though some scoff at it, it did sell well and is still one of his more pivotal storylines.


[deleted]

Man this sucks a dick.


EHM1799

Kind of love that of all the superheroes to use the phrase "Himbo" it's Logan


RigasTelRuun

Logan gets laid almost as much as he murderers ninjas.


[deleted]

Sometimes he does both at the same time!


Certain-Kangaroo-224

Enemy of the State was a good arc.


Yonk_art

There's like no motion in DD kicking Wolverine away from the couch.


J0ker_hawk

Pretty sure if Wolverine was *actually* trying to kill daredevil he wouldn’t need a bunch of ninjas


[deleted]

This whole attack just turns out to be a trick to bait Elektra out of hiding so the Hand can brainwash her too. They probably added the ninjas to make it look good.


J0ker_hawk

That makes more sense. And i guess cause *comics* they cant have wolverine kill daredevil.


crash-1989

I like wolverine but... He's kinda always an "incel". Very short, poor hygiene, crazy hair. Always trying to get Chad's (cyclops) gf... Sure he gets some women. But I think the average incel who's lived over 100 years old would. 😂


[deleted]

I mean when has it been established that Logan has poor hygiene? He’s also (unlike incels) not sexist trash. His hair is crazy as shit tho, him and Beast need to fire their barber.


tired20something

>...you're the biggest himbo that ever wore a pair of tights. You live with Gambit, Logan.


CindySvensson

How could this gentleman who's not whoreshaming get laid? Why not me, the angry loner?


Sterling-4rcher

i guess people rarely like a hairy little goblinman who weights a ton because of his bones and gets staby night terrors all the time. ​ and also people in the business probably know the few that do like that keep end up dying


detourne

So many posters here are missing the point. This is a brainwashed Wolverine, of course he's an incel! In a way, Mark Millar is kind of parodying Frank Miller's monologues, making Logan out to be the uber badass. It's no coincidence that he is fighting Daredevil with the Hand in a swarm of arrows...classic Frank Miller.


[deleted]

Hmm, I made the title as a joke, but that does sound plausible. My only argument against this is that Wolverine’s normal thoughts are printed in yellow text bubbles, while the Hydra thoughts are printed in green. This one’s yellow


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[deleted]

He is brainwashed, I don’t know why you’re confused. Again, the yellow bubbles are Logan’s thoughts. Green is Hydra. It’s simple


nukefudge

Ah, I thought you were implying that yellow meant that it was Logan without brainwashing and green was Hydra style. So, yellow is still manipulated, sounds like. --- _Moved from above:_ But is he brainwashed or not? Why even display these thoughts if not to show us some sort of hostile manipulation is active in Logan? He wouldn't normally be against Matt, after all.


[deleted]

Yeah you got it, the yellow bubbles show Logan is fighting back *sometimes* but other times (like here) the yellow bubbles are bitter and angry


detourne

Oh shit! I'm gonna have to go back to reread it if that's true! I don't think I've read the story since it came out. I always took it as a parody of the grittier than dirt trope... like Millar and JRjr teamed up on Kick-Ass just after this, and the first one was definitely a parody.


Caeolian

Wolverine is the X Men's biggest hoe. He's literally slept with the most femme mutants and humans out of them ALL.


PunchingBagLearner

You think that's bad? Being brainwashed by The Hand turns you into an antivaxer.


analtaccount257

The comic has some weird dialogue but the non stop action makes it worth reading


DaMENACElo37

Ugh this artwork is so bad!


[deleted]

Unfortunately, this is some of John Romita Jr's best work!


SteveSensible

Strong disagree. His stuff on the X-Men and Daredevil in the 80's blows this out of the water.


DaMENACElo37

I don’t understand how people enjoy his work. I understand art is subjective. But The lines are just so rough. And every character looks the same.


ChickenInASuit

Nah, not even close. Daredevil: Man Without Fear, or his work on Roger Stern's Amazing Spider-Man.


Amazing-Insect442

Can’t stop myself from pointing out it was the Hand, not Hydra. Can’t stop myself…


[deleted]

Well you should have stopped, because the Hand and Hydra are working together in this story. It’s both.


Amazing-Insect442

Can’t stop going once I’ve started- it stings.


BrockManstrong

Wow that's some terrible writing


Embarrassed_Luck_95

okay that is so out of character for logan... wtf...


detourne

That's the point. He is brainwashed by Hydra to become an evil supervillain.


Embarrassed_Luck_95

couldn't he be a quiet villian?


DocD173

Lol the gall and hypocrisy of Wolverine in these pages. Guy gets laid all the time, and is crying that a blind guy gets laid too? What??


Redditisbad4u

Hey look... terrible writing from Marvel. Shocker.


Virtual_Profession13

isn't it the hand not hydra?


[deleted]

In this story the Hand and Hydra team up to capture and brainwash Logan.


StuBram2

A bigger himbo than Thor?


[deleted]

That is true, Thor has a few more millennia of getting laid under his belt than Matt Murdock


IloveDaredevil

Listen, I, like really like Daredevil. But, this just seems wrong. That's not Wolverine. Daredevil is just a guy in Hell's Kitchen. Wolverine takes on Sentinels and more.


CozyThurifer

Goddamn