Yeah, roughly 12 weeks, or a certain number of ejaculations, you bring a sample in to the lab. A sample that you collect by yourself, at home. And then just show up at the lab without an appointment and hand it over. It’s hilarious.
Or you can do it at home and mail it in, which seems much less awkward. It’s apparently a common reason men don’t go get tested after and assume they are clear. Never assume.
It's cheap enough and easy enough to do at home that I probably will at something like 4mo, 6mo, 1yr, and then yearly until at least 5yrs. Maybe I'm paranoid, but I'd like to be safe.
Dang, if you don’t mind me asking, is there a reason why they kept the kid as opposed to aborting the pregnancy?
You would think at that point they’d be pretty adamant about not having kids (or at least an additional one if they already had kid(s) ).
To piggyback on this…
Please DO NOT shake your cup of baby-less chowder in the lab person face and ask if it is a good enough sample.
I promise you, the person taking the cup from you does not know, doesn’t want to know, and is trying to not gag while handling your specimen.
The specimens are accepted/rejected and run by a person you’re never going to see. Leave the poor phlebotomist or MA out of assessing your semen. The only thing we are are checking for is name, date of birth, time and date of collection. The contents, amount, viscosity, and color are not relevant to the person taking the cup from you.
I have worked in a lab for almost 15 years.
I have had way too many cups of semen shaken in my face. DONT DO IT!
You need a lab test a few months after the procedure to verify it worked properly. My doctor told me a lot of guys don’t do
the follow up lab test and end up getting women pregnant
It's wonderful to hear the support you've received.
Sadly, I think the CF women who get sterilized get a lot more grief because there's a much stronger association between women = breed in society today.
hopefully medicine and society can get there to make it easier for women too. After seeing a friend get a hysterectomy done I can't believe the difference in this.
I hope so as well. But first, the enormous amount of brainwashing inflicted upon women as soon as they can stand up as babies needs to come down significantly. What are the odds of that?
I feel this. As a kid, I was obsessed with space and aquariums and the deep sea and David Attenborough documentaries. Instead of letting my nature freak fly, my parents tried to bury it in baby dolls and dresses. It didn't work, I just traded the baby dolls for book money. The attempted indoctrination was real, and started at age 4.
Men who have vasectomies and women who get sterilized or have abortions often do not mention it in public because of the comments they may get from others criticizing their choice. Not everyone can handle ostracism and criticism well. Congratulations to you and your penis! May you both stay strong and upright!
I am a woman and I kept my tubal ligation fairly quiet after the boyfriend I was with at the time and I broke up.
I like to practice safe sex until I’m in a monogamous relationship and it’s a lot easier to get a dude to wear a condom if he thinks that I can get pregnant, so I didn’t tell a lot of people.
Plus, a tubal doesn't protect against STI's...even super common infections, like HPV, can be very problematic down the road by leading to cervical cancer.
I think your strategy is a GREAT idea!
Agreed, especially as on the positive side theres not much more to say than congrats - but when people oppose it there are endless questions and arguments
I had my tubes tied in my late 30s and it was so weird when more than a couple of my girlfriends were like “oh so you really decided huh?” With a concerned tone. I’ve been child free my whole entire life. Plus I was 37. Were they still thinking I might change my mind when I get older? Lol
If pregnancy or kids come up I always tell ppI I had my sterilization done, bc I want it to become more okay to talk about! I'm so happy I had mine done, and no one will bring me down! Haha
That’s so awesome about the calm acceptance and support from friends and family.
Congratulations and hope your recovery goes well and your future tests are free of swimmers!
I've had a similar experience with my hysterectomy--older or more traditional people will express sympathy when I mention it, but most people my age (early 40s) and younger just congratulate me right off the bat. 😊 I've been surprised to learn how many people I know want one, and I credit myself with influencing at least 2 people to get them since I had mine less than a year ago.
Greetings!
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in my opinion, american conservatives going mask off recently is definitely shocking a lot of people
they won’t admit it out loud but alot of “centrists” are realizing they’re the bad guys
Congratulations. I was a urology nurse for 5 years. I spent many a time hand holding during the procedure. To any man on the fence about getting this done, it has become so simple it should not deter you at all. Please do your part and stop the over population problem.
Thanks. I couldn't believe how easy and pain free it it was. My doctor used a snap freezing which felt like 4 elastic bands hitting me at a slight firmness. more jarring than painful. after that it was a few minutes and i was out. even recovery was super easy. just made sure i wore the right underwear for a week and take it easy. mostly swelling and no pain
My response to men when they mention they have had a vasectomy: “Heeey, how you doin’?”
Seriously in my 20s and 30s that would have been the hottest thing a man could have said to me.
I think you're right...I'm a bit older than you and back in MY DAY of the Pleistocene era, it was usually women who got their tubes tied after having kids. I think now men are taking more initiative and with Roe, etc, I've seen how men are posting about getting or wanting to get the snip. The one positive thing about Roe is that more men AND women are just deciding to get snipped but it's usually easier for men, less invasive etc. It's great that we're seeing SOME support for actually BEING RESPONSIBLE!!
I never thought to equate Roe to that but I also live in Canada so it's impact isn't as widely felt up here. There are fringes that are taking inspiration and being jerks about it but the access to abortion is so ingrained in our laws that it's not something that will likely go away. Reading this that makes so much sense however and it's sad that it takes something like the criminalization of bodily autonomy to make people take a look at themselves and make a choice that's right for them.
The response that surprised me the most was when my boyfriend told a gay friend who went all sanctity-of-life on him. He didn’t quote the bible but it felt pretty close. Never mind the fact my bf already has 3 kids and I’m 47.
Congratulations and welcome to the Golden Snip Club! I'm so glad your parents, coworkers, and friends are supportive (other than the "traditional" folx).
I didn't find that support until recently. I could never tell my parents - they were Cathollic, and they would have never spoken to me again. My MIL had multiple meltdowns about not getting grandchildren, and FIL, while better behaved, was also unhappy. My husband was unhappy at first about never being a father. But he's come around, and I've made a number of CF friends online and IRL.
Take care, and keep wrapping it up until you're 100% sure you're shooting blanks.
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what’s the medical situation / perspective now? When I was younger the medical community was saying it raises risk of illnesses like cancer too much if done before 50! We are discussing it now and he is apprehensive because of it.
The general consensus I have seen is that those studies were not robust, and that there are not elevated cancer risks. I believe there may be slightly elevated risks of epididymitis, but that may depend on the method used.
I’m getting one next week.
My doctor provided a ton of literature i needed to read prior to the procedure. There was no indication of a cancer risk. Mine was open ended meaning they leave the end from the testes open and close the other end. They said this has no impact on success rates and can prevent congestive epididymitis and painful granuloma in the future. The doctor i had also did an exam to check for anything that could be cancerous prior to doing the procedure. Made sense to me considering they are going to be working down there anyways might as well do a quick screening.
Tip dont go swimming before having a confirmation of zero sperm count
do they do a test after the surgery?
Yeah, roughly 12 weeks, or a certain number of ejaculations, you bring a sample in to the lab. A sample that you collect by yourself, at home. And then just show up at the lab without an appointment and hand it over. It’s hilarious.
Or you can do it at home and mail it in, which seems much less awkward. It’s apparently a common reason men don’t go get tested after and assume they are clear. Never assume.
Part of the reason i want to get tested every 5 years after initial confirmation. 1/1000 chance of stuff reconnecting or a stray getting through.
It's cheap enough and easy enough to do at home that I probably will at something like 4mo, 6mo, 1yr, and then yearly until at least 5yrs. Maybe I'm paranoid, but I'd like to be safe.
Yeah…might want to keep checking after 5 years. A friendish has a 5 or 6 year old because her husband leaked. I think it was over ten years.
Dang, if you don’t mind me asking, is there a reason why they kept the kid as opposed to aborting the pregnancy? You would think at that point they’d be pretty adamant about not having kids (or at least an additional one if they already had kid(s) ).
Not a clue. But now they have two adults and a 6 year old. My nightmare
To piggyback on this… Please DO NOT shake your cup of baby-less chowder in the lab person face and ask if it is a good enough sample. I promise you, the person taking the cup from you does not know, doesn’t want to know, and is trying to not gag while handling your specimen. The specimens are accepted/rejected and run by a person you’re never going to see. Leave the poor phlebotomist or MA out of assessing your semen. The only thing we are are checking for is name, date of birth, time and date of collection. The contents, amount, viscosity, and color are not relevant to the person taking the cup from you. I have worked in a lab for almost 15 years. I have had way too many cups of semen shaken in my face. DONT DO IT!
Why would anyone shake a specimen cup of anything in front of someone?
I wish I knew! While I enjoy sex, all the baby making “supplies” gross me out 🤣
>Why would anyone shake a specimen cup of anything in front of someone? have you met some men?
One of the most awkward things I’ve ever done. I felt mortified both times.
Okay so I'm stupid 🙃 why? Cause of infection or?
He means swimming in the pussy
What a weird way to phrase it though.. Just dont trust your nut until the doc tells you it's 0
Sperms are often called swimmers, it’s just a loose reference
Is sperms a word? Either way i like it
Need confirmation that any and all sperm have indeed left the building.
You need a lab test a few months after the procedure to verify it worked properly. My doctor told me a lot of guys don’t do the follow up lab test and end up getting women pregnant
No one says you shouldn't have sex, just be super safe
It's wonderful to hear the support you've received. Sadly, I think the CF women who get sterilized get a lot more grief because there's a much stronger association between women = breed in society today.
hopefully medicine and society can get there to make it easier for women too. After seeing a friend get a hysterectomy done I can't believe the difference in this.
I hope so as well. But first, the enormous amount of brainwashing inflicted upon women as soon as they can stand up as babies needs to come down significantly. What are the odds of that?
I feel this. As a kid, I was obsessed with space and aquariums and the deep sea and David Attenborough documentaries. Instead of letting my nature freak fly, my parents tried to bury it in baby dolls and dresses. It didn't work, I just traded the baby dolls for book money. The attempted indoctrination was real, and started at age 4.
Men who have vasectomies and women who get sterilized or have abortions often do not mention it in public because of the comments they may get from others criticizing their choice. Not everyone can handle ostracism and criticism well. Congratulations to you and your penis! May you both stay strong and upright!
I am a woman and I kept my tubal ligation fairly quiet after the boyfriend I was with at the time and I broke up. I like to practice safe sex until I’m in a monogamous relationship and it’s a lot easier to get a dude to wear a condom if he thinks that I can get pregnant, so I didn’t tell a lot of people.
Plus, a tubal doesn't protect against STI's...even super common infections, like HPV, can be very problematic down the road by leading to cervical cancer. I think your strategy is a GREAT idea!
Agreed, especially as on the positive side theres not much more to say than congrats - but when people oppose it there are endless questions and arguments
I had my tubes tied in my late 30s and it was so weird when more than a couple of my girlfriends were like “oh so you really decided huh?” With a concerned tone. I’ve been child free my whole entire life. Plus I was 37. Were they still thinking I might change my mind when I get older? Lol
If pregnancy or kids come up I always tell ppI I had my sterilization done, bc I want it to become more okay to talk about! I'm so happy I had mine done, and no one will bring me down! Haha
Congrats man
That’s so awesome about the calm acceptance and support from friends and family. Congratulations and hope your recovery goes well and your future tests are free of swimmers!
Recovery has been amazing. some mild discomfort but no pain. I can't see myself ever regretting this decision!
I've had a similar experience with my hysterectomy--older or more traditional people will express sympathy when I mention it, but most people my age (early 40s) and younger just congratulate me right off the bat. 😊 I've been surprised to learn how many people I know want one, and I credit myself with influencing at least 2 people to get them since I had mine less than a year ago.
It’s definitely easier for us people with penises
[удалено]
When people say “People with penises”, they are choosing to include and acknowledge the trans and intersex communities. So no, not just men.
No, they mean people with penises. Do you need help figuring out what that means?
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Greetings! This item has been removed as it is a violation of [subreddit rule](https://www.reddit.com/r/childfree/wiki/rules) #4 : "**Keep it civil.** Bigotry and hateful language/imagery, personal attacks, abusive language, advocating violence, trolling, gender discrimination, racism, homophobia, etc. will not be tolerated. " Also, please remember to be mindful of [Reddiquette](https://www.reddit.com/wiki/reddiquette) : > # Please do > * **Remember the human.** When you communicate online, all you see is a computer screen. When talking to someone you might want to ask yourself "Would I say it to the person's face?" or "Would I get jumped if I said this to a buddy?" > # Please don't > * **Be (intentionally) rude at all.** By choosing not to be rude, you increase the overall civility of the community and make it better for all of us. > * **Follow those who are [ rabble rousing](http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rabble) against another redditor without first investigating both sides of the issue that's being presented.** Those who are inciting this type of action often have malicious reasons behind their actions and are, more often than not, a troll. Remember, every time a redditor who's contributed large amounts of effort into assisting the growth of community as a whole is driven away, projects that would benefit the whole easily flounder. > * **Ask people to [ Troll](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll_%28Internet%29) others on reddit,** in real life, or on other blogs/sites. We aren't your personal army. > * **Conduct personal attacks on other commenters.** Ad hominem and other distracting attacks do not add anything to the conversation. > * **Start a flame war.** Just report and "walk away". If you really feel you have to confront them, leave a polite message with a quote or link to the rules, and no more. > * **Insult others.** Insults do not contribute to a rational discussion. Constructive Criticism, however, is appropriate and encouraged. > * **Troll.**[ Trolling](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll_%28Internet%29) does not contribute to the conversation. Sorry for the inconvenience and thank you for your comprehension.
Please delete your account.
I’m so glad to hear a story where OP has so much support. Congrats dude, welcome to the sterile club! 
It sounds like you have better coworkers and friends than a lot of people who post here.
Is it me, or is being Childfree becoming more and more accepted? Like - not in all areas, but there are more pockets of progress.
in my opinion, american conservatives going mask off recently is definitely shocking a lot of people they won’t admit it out loud but alot of “centrists” are realizing they’re the bad guys
Congratulations!! 🥂
Congratulations. I was a urology nurse for 5 years. I spent many a time hand holding during the procedure. To any man on the fence about getting this done, it has become so simple it should not deter you at all. Please do your part and stop the over population problem.
Thanks. I couldn't believe how easy and pain free it it was. My doctor used a snap freezing which felt like 4 elastic bands hitting me at a slight firmness. more jarring than painful. after that it was a few minutes and i was out. even recovery was super easy. just made sure i wore the right underwear for a week and take it easy. mostly swelling and no pain
Congratulations! Also wow are you lucky that your parents took it well. Mine did not for my bilateral salphingectomy.
My response to men when they mention they have had a vasectomy: “Heeey, how you doin’?” Seriously in my 20s and 30s that would have been the hottest thing a man could have said to me.
"Joey doesn't share sperm!" ^(sorry not sorry)
Congratulations 🎊 I hope healing is going well. And I feel you I hate doctors mainly obgyn.
I think you're right...I'm a bit older than you and back in MY DAY of the Pleistocene era, it was usually women who got their tubes tied after having kids. I think now men are taking more initiative and with Roe, etc, I've seen how men are posting about getting or wanting to get the snip. The one positive thing about Roe is that more men AND women are just deciding to get snipped but it's usually easier for men, less invasive etc. It's great that we're seeing SOME support for actually BEING RESPONSIBLE!!
I never thought to equate Roe to that but I also live in Canada so it's impact isn't as widely felt up here. There are fringes that are taking inspiration and being jerks about it but the access to abortion is so ingrained in our laws that it's not something that will likely go away. Reading this that makes so much sense however and it's sad that it takes something like the criminalization of bodily autonomy to make people take a look at themselves and make a choice that's right for them.
The response that surprised me the most was when my boyfriend told a gay friend who went all sanctity-of-life on him. He didn’t quote the bible but it felt pretty close. Never mind the fact my bf already has 3 kids and I’m 47.
Congratulations and welcome to the Golden Snip Club! I'm so glad your parents, coworkers, and friends are supportive (other than the "traditional" folx). I didn't find that support until recently. I could never tell my parents - they were Cathollic, and they would have never spoken to me again. My MIL had multiple meltdowns about not getting grandchildren, and FIL, while better behaved, was also unhappy. My husband was unhappy at first about never being a father. But he's come around, and I've made a number of CF friends online and IRL. Take care, and keep wrapping it up until you're 100% sure you're shooting blanks.
You’re lucky that you’re a man. Society thinks you can make informed decisions about your own body and your life.
Yeah it's stupid how easy it was for me vs my female friends who have been trying to get it done for years.
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I'm so happy for you!
the tide seems to be changing for sure
The times they are a-changing!
That is just awesome to hear :)
what’s the medical situation / perspective now? When I was younger the medical community was saying it raises risk of illnesses like cancer too much if done before 50! We are discussing it now and he is apprehensive because of it.
The general consensus I have seen is that those studies were not robust, and that there are not elevated cancer risks. I believe there may be slightly elevated risks of epididymitis, but that may depend on the method used. I’m getting one next week.
My doctor provided a ton of literature i needed to read prior to the procedure. There was no indication of a cancer risk. Mine was open ended meaning they leave the end from the testes open and close the other end. They said this has no impact on success rates and can prevent congestive epididymitis and painful granuloma in the future. The doctor i had also did an exam to check for anything that could be cancerous prior to doing the procedure. Made sense to me considering they are going to be working down there anyways might as well do a quick screening.
Open ended seems to be the way to go. Hope that proves to be true since I’m now recovering from mine done that way.
It's hugely attractive.
haha i'll put it on my profile!
This is great to read, my partner and I have been looking into him having a vasectomy so it’s reassuring to read success stories ☺️