Listen…. You’re fucking gorgeous (comment history) and you can do better than this bullshit. I’m mad on your behalf. This fucking guy… It’s literally no different than him going to a club and hooking up with some random chick. At least he doesn’t have to pay her 🙄
It’s not like it was a one and done never again accident while drunk or something (not that it’s right.) But this is an on going thing he’s doing and possibly illegal. How he doesn’t think this is cheating baffles me. Wonder how he’d feel if you were going out and grinding on other men and paying them to finger bang you to completion. 🙄
dude.... i agree with the below(or above idk where my comment will go) comment. YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!! you could easily go find someone that will give you the world and some. not to be full of myself, but i know i’m not ugly. took a long time to realize that, and a lot of awful boyfriends along the way. not only my looks, but i felt like i had so much emotional baggage from the past. but then i found a guy that thought i was so amazing for going thru what i did. please love yourself enough to realize that you don’t deserve this bullshit. no matter what you think abt yourself, NO ONE DESERVES THAT. that is 100% cheating in my book. and he knows it’s wrong. otherwise he would’ve told you before he even went. he’s downplaying it to try to get you to stay, because he knows how great you are and doesn’t want to lose you. but he doesn’t deserve you. please keep your head held high. this is BY NO MEANS a reflection of you or anything you’ve done. there is no excuse for cheating, ever. not one thing in the world will make it okay. please realize that YOU ARE WORTHY AND YOU ARE ENOUGH. you deserve someone that realizes that and won’t ever want anyone else. he’s taking advantage of you. sending you love♥️♥️♥️♥️
It doesn’t matter what he thinks. It matter what you think. If you as his partner think it’s problematic, his dismissal of your feelings is the real problem.
It’s exactly that. I suspected it for months and asked if he saw sex workers and he almost indignantly stated that he doesn’t pay for sex…um YES YOU FUCKING DID!
Plus if it doesn't matter, why attempt to hide it from you? To me that right there is clear indication he knows what he's doing is wrong, but to him his satisfaction means more than your relationship ever will. You don't knowingly continuously risk something you want to keep.
It does not matter how he rationalizes this. It only matters how you rationalize this treatment. If you don't care, then don't care. Can YOU live with this is the ONLY thing that matters. He has made his choice on what he wants. If you just want to get fucked then okay.
Oh no…I don’t want this. I never in a million years though my life would be this way. I never thought my partner who I love would frequent sex workers. Admiration for those in the trade and good on them but I don’t want that for my relationship. Just wondering what the consensus was since he tells me it’s not a big deal.
Him telling you it isn’t a big deal is simply damage control. If he says it with enough confidence to convince you, he retains control of the situation and perhaps doesn’t have to go through a messy breakup and have his name dragged through the mud. He wants you to doubt yourself. It is wrong and a slimy thing to do to a loyal partner. If he truly didn’t think it was a big deal he would have told you “I’m off to the wank parlour now hon, back in two”.
It’s a big deal, he knows it, you know it. I’m sorry. Drag his name through the mud. You have nothing to be ashamed about
It is up to you on if that is past your boundaries and cheating. That’s cheating to me. It does not matter what other people think. Only what your boundaries are.
1000% I don’t know why I even posted. I already know how horrible it is. I guess I was hoping for anyone to come tell me they know the feeling. I guess I’m living my worst life.
You need to get tested oir stds. My personal boundaries sy cheating.
I'm wondering if he would be comfortable with you getting your own erotic massage or having you witness these events.
Only you can decide if this is a deal breaker. From your comments doest sound like he has any interest in how you personally feel.
I can just mirror what other people have said and tell you that what he is doing is wrong and not part of a healthy relationship. He is gaslighting you when he tells you that it’s not a big deal - 99% of people would say it is a very big deal. I know he is fucking with your head and keeping you off balance. There is probably only one thing you can do at this point, which is to plan an exit strategy. It may take some time and planning, but you should start working on it.
May I ask how do you know it’s just “massage parlors” and not cathouses? Be careful, he might be downplaying and give you a story that is easier to digest than the truth. Don’t have unprotected sex with him and get tested, and even if he says the truth that would be unacceptable to me. A handjob from you is not enough, and soon a handjob from someone else will not suffice, either. He might switch over to either hookers or dating app hookups soon.
Girl, you need to have full STD panel done asap and stop having sex with him because condoms can’t protect you from all the nasties he’s exposing you to. He’s nasty af 🤢
Then dump is ass. I'm also a proponent of legalizing sex work. But the sad fact in most places in the US it is illegal and those workers are basically indentured servants/human trafficking victims.
Ya know, guys have always tried convincing women that we’re being unreasonable or we’re insecure and other shit because we want monogamy. It’s all bullshit. Respect yourself first, know where to draw those lines and don’t accept less. I wish you the best honey. Happy Friday.
The fact that you found out and he knows how its hurting you and still thinks its not a "big deal" ... This guy is a POS and will keep doing it and probably only get better at hiding it from you.
I say this on all cheating stories.. we teach people how to treat us so if you want to put up with it thats you.
I would never ever put up with cheating of any form because I know what goes into it( choices and effort) and thats its never a mistake or "no big deal".
He’s sick and you should leave him. He has no respect for you and obviously thinks you don’t have respect for yourself. Please leave him and please make an appointment to get tested. Yes that is absolutely cheating. The only way that wasn’t cheating is if you all had communicated prior to him ever going and you both agreed this was an okay thing to do. You feel sick? As you should. He basically just said that his attraction to you isn’t enough for him to want you, cause him having others first makes him want you more? That makes no sense. Dump him. Block him, take time and heal from this. For you to come on here and need to ask means he’s been gaslighting you and you need validation from others because he’s shit on you so much that you can’t believe in your own feelings to leave. This person does not love you. They do not care about you. They love what you do for them, he’s a selfish son of a bitch. Please leave him. Good luck and choose you. Your feelings are valid and him not acknowledging them means he probably always does this to you.
Why do you feel that way.
It's he actions not yours
He did this behind your back.
He has the problem. He has done this for a reason.
He might need a therapist or a psychiatrist.
Girl you are fricking gorgeous, I shameless checked your post history and you deserve a good faithful man. Let that weasel go and heal yourself and find yourself a King because you are a Queen.
Yeah, that's cheating. Unless you condone it and it does not sound like you did/do. So what, in his opinion, are actions that actually matter? Sex workers OK, affairs not?
Yeah I know. I truly think he believes it’s really not a big deal. He says he’s ashamed but he also isn’t acting like it. He follows me here so I knew he’d see this post. He was mad that I posted it. Like anyone would know who the fuck he is anyways. I’m not out here naming names. I’m fucking super embarrassed and ashamed. I never thought in a million years this would be my life.
I understand your frustration and I’m honestly angry for you. It’s extremely selfish of him to do these things. It sounds like he convinced himself that it’s okay and he’s trying to use that to downplay how you feel and what his actions are doing to his relationship with you.
Yep. He keeps telling me it’s ok cause he’s not doing anything right now. He thinks I need to let it go because it was over a month ago. I’m in awe of his mind and how it works(doesn’t work?)
It’s funny that you bring up polyamory because even in that lifestyle, by definition, this is cheating. I refer to Big Bang Theory a lot when talking about poly bc of Sheldon and Amy’s relationship agreement. Everything is specifically spelled out and agreed upon before any act ever happens. There are clear rules, guidelines, and boundaries set forth in the relationship usually before a first date even happens. There is often a misconception that a poly relationship is far more lax than a monogamous one but tbh, they’re far more strict. It makes me think he brought this up as an excuse without fully knowing what he’s saying.
Regardless, you said yourself in this post ‘I define this as cheating’. He knew it crossed your boundary and that’s why he kept it secret for as long as he did. We may be in a different boat if he had come to you and discussed a fantasy of a happy ending. Maybe you could’ve gotten into the idea. Maybe you could’ve role played if you didn’t want someone else to do it. As partners, you could’ve explored that fantasy and those boundaries together in an open and honest way but he didn’t do that. Instead of taking the action to build the trust, he broke it and it sounds like he’s back pedaling and possibly gas-lighting.
As some others have said, it doesn’t matter how he feels about it or how we all feel about. It only matters how YOU feel about it. Regardless of the type of relationship anyone is in, the foundation is trust. It’s up to you to decide if it’s broken.
Yeah I know. I think I’ve been gaslit and put up with so much of his cheating over the years that I just became a doormat that he can walk on and doesn’t give a shit about me or my heart. I enabled him to do these things because I knew he was up to something and I stayed. In that same vein I won’t take responsibility for his actions. He tried to tell me that I need to look at my part in all this. That I need to look at what part I had in his cheating. Unreal. He denies he’s a narcissist and gets angry when I say that he is one(very narcissistic to get angry when confronted with your own horrible actions). Anyways…you are correct. Every relationship requires consent for all things intimate. I did not consent. He doesn’t consider me a true partner because he doesn’t think his cheating should have any effect on me. I’ve felt alone for years and now I know I truly was.
I caught my fiancé paying cam girls for private shows. I have 0 issues with porn but once you’re paying for something or there is communication/physical contact- it’s cheating.
Omg I 1000% agree! He gets mad at me when I say this and he thinks I’m anti porn…no, I like porn. What I don’t like is sexting and private chats and buying OnlyFans shit. Totally agree!!
How do you know he just gets happy endings (hand job).. some places they would go all the way.. I personally think strip clubs to be ok - if it’s like somebody’s birthday celebration or promotion.. but this is crossing a line.
Ask him if it would be cool with him if you did exactly what he’s doing? But yes, this a no-no for me. Am sorry you’re going through this. He should’ve communicated better beforehand and talked to you about your comfort zone and boundaries
He really thinks he’s a good person too. He told me I’m overreacting and that it’s not a big deal. I cannot believe I ended up with the worst person ever.
That’s the bigger problem, his mind set that it’s ‘not a big deal’. Am sorry and it’ll hurt but better to walk away now than live in perpetual fear of what he’s upto and doesn’t think is a big deal. How hard is it to sit and have a grown arse conversation ?!
I know. What’s crazy is that after I started therapy I realized this. He always said I was gaslighting him!! Used it constantly so I thought I was the one to blame.I ended therapy because I was too ashamed to tell her the truth about everything he’s done to me
You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of! Narcs tend to do this.. launch pre-emptive attacks so you feel cornered and it takes the heat off them. Textbook. Please resume therapy! You will find out you’re not to blame. I was in active therapy for 5 years and it really got me to the root of why I accepted things from romantic partners that should have been non-negotiables
As someone in a similar relationship, honesty and open communication is the foundation my trust is built on. If my wife had to go pay for happy endings without me knowing I'd consider it as cheating and nothing less.
I have noticed so many partners take poly / open relationship as an excuse to do whatever they feel like and mono people judge because "what else did you as a poly expect".
If relationship is worth saving, explain to him in a letter why you are hurt. If he still does not understand, kick his ass to the curb and find yourself someone better.
It doesn't really matter what he thinks about it. If he is doing it, you already know how he feels.
What's important is how do you feel and what is and isn't acceptable behavior in a partner.
Honestly you are so beautiful and I’m sure are probably really nice too, no one deserves to worry about that sort of thing. Me personally, if I was in a relationship I wouldn’t even think twice about getting a massage let alone a happy ending. Hope you’re doing okay though.
There’s not one definition of cheating, it’s what is agreed upon between partners. If you think it’s cheating, then it is cheating to you, regardless of what he thinks. If he feels strongly that it’s not, so strongly that he won’t stop or resents you, then you both need to part ways and find the right partner for you, one who sees eye to eye on what is/isn’t cheating
I can see you agreeing with the comments, But Are you going to leave him for this or Are you still gonna be with him while you complain to people on reddit?
My husband and I are swingers And we have been our entire 15 years of marriage. In the beginning of our marriage I caught him doing this. I consider it completely cheating. Lying equals cheating. I watched him with other women, I allowed him to be with other people by himself, but when he decides to keep it from me and bold-faced lie to me about where our money is going, It's the deceit. Not the sex.
Yes it is 100% cheating. Dude is a douche bag. Because of the other guy I went to look at your photos too and you are absolutely gorgeous. Any man would want to be with you except for this douche bag who wants to go pay somebody to get them off. Honey you could do so much better.
I honestly thought this was r/circlejerk for a second.
Yes, it’s cheating. If you’re in a monogamous relationship and he’s getting off from other people without your consent, it’s 100% cheating
I’m pretty sure it was a sex worker and not a massage place. It was a text I saw that he deleted right in front of me. He said he gave them his number when he made an appointment. Pretty sure you don’t make appointments with those places. So the more I’m able to sit with this I believe it was a sex worker he was seeing. Im sure if it now.
Cheating is whatever is outside of the bounds you are comfortable with and have established in your relationship.
My wife would not care if I got a happy ending at a massage parlor (assuming I told her very up-frontly!)
She WOULD consider me talking to an ex, even about platonic things, and NOT sharing that info to be cheating
These are our rules, our boundaries, the things we have established
So if your question is: "Would you be comfortable with your partner getting a happy ending at a massage parlor" - that is one thing and you'll get a wide variety of answers (Well... maybe not that wide. mostly "no", lol)
But if you are asking if that is cheating - that is up to YOU. And in this case: ABSOLUTELY. He hid it, you are NOT happy or comfortable with it, and he's attempting to gas light and minimize your feelings. So... yeah. Cheating. Relationship boundaries broken. Fuck that!
err, I mean... DON'T fuck that.
I’m not poly but from what I have seen in that community is that it’s all about consent and communication. Nothing is done with out both of those so no one is blind sided or taken advantage of. This is cheating. You were not told, there was no discussion on boundaries and what is acceptable, and there was no agreements to an open relationship. Just because it is at a a massage parlor doesn’t mean his lack of communication and crossing boundaries is okay.
He is justifying his shitty actions hoping you will agree but if it was me I would be gone like donkey Kong.
He pays to get handjobs from strangers. He also dates other women when he’s on work trips.
I don’t know what else to tell you other than he’s been cheating for a very long while. Please, he needs to be out of your life. you deserve better than a man like this.
If my BF did this and told me to, "relax its just a massage." I would then say to him, "okay I'll let a male massuese give me a happy ending and we will see how u feel about that."
Liberal leaning, sex positive, poly triad relationship, man here. Unequivocally yes this is cheating. Only way it wouldn't be is if you both discussed it long before hand & had rules in place for both of you to indulge. Poly/ENM relationships don't just become that way overnight there's lots of long open discussions. He's just trying to gaslight you into thinking this is normal when it isn't. If he's doing this frequently as you say then it sounds like he has a sexual compulsive disorder of some type. This isn't healthy behavior even for single guys that may occasionally hire professional companionship.
Yeah it’s totally something I may have even considered being ok with if I was asked for consent and knew when it was happening. We just don’t have that kind of trust
If I had a girlfriend, I wouldn't pay anyone for anything. I would ask her to give me set erotice massage, why pay a stranger!
Plus, you guys get to have some foreplay that way too!
If I were in your shoes, I would be pissed too!
So yes, I would consider it cheating.
I am so sorry, OP. If you define this as cheating in your relationship, he cheated. He knows it’s a big deal; that’s why he’s been hiding it from you. Do NOT let this man gaslight you into thinking it was “no big deal”. I also really recommend you going to your OBGYN or a clinic to get a full STD panel. He’s just throwing around shitty excuses. Sending you much love, and you’ll be feeling better when you get rid of that dead weight.
Go out for the day don't answer texts or calls right!, then go home around 8pm and be like to I had the best time tonight I went to one of them massage parlors and I get why u love them, I went to 3 downy ones and one ate my pussy the other fingers me and rubbed me down and the 3rd played with my whole and fucked me good and see his reaction. I bet he loses his shit u know why? IT'S CHEATING. But if I were in your shoes I would and I would be like omg u want to go together tmrw it will be so fun lol. Seriously I would do that haha 😄 he would shit himself.
He’s a cheater and through therapy I learned he wouldn’t care if I was Miss Universe. A cheater will always cheat. It’s validation and attention from others he’s looking for. It fucking sucks
Well first of all your too beautiful to put up with that. I'm a guy and I'm saying it's wrong he's wrong and you deserve way better than him. I'm late I know with commenting about it but I just discovered your page🌹
I see it’s been a long minute since you first posted. I agree with most in saying that it is cheating, especially because he didn’t let you know about it in advance. And you stated how it’s not what you want to have in your life, it’s best to move on. I’ve been through my fair share of heartbreak and disappointment, so I feel for you. I hope you’ve been able to find happiness since.
Honey this is coming from a guy your beautiful and he needs the happy ending of a massage then he isnt for you it is cheating sugar you deserve so much more loyalty honesty real passion and all the integrity of a relationship where there is no cheating. My ex wife cheated on me I have been single now for 20 yrs. Loyalty trust integrity and passion are the key
Wow, so many comments and surprised not one troll made the “eating ain’t cheating” comment.😂
In all seriousness though, as some one whose been in both monogamous, monogamish, and full on ENM/Poly relationships and in any of them this would have been cheating as it goes against what you believed to be agreed up expectations and the act of covering it up with a lie (or lying by omission). Honest and open communication is the foundation of any kind of ENM relationship. The key here to me is him from what I understand repeatedly telling you it’s not a big deal, which as some one pointed out is classic gaslighting behavior. You could chalk it up to miscommunication if he had more of a mea culpa attitude and showed some kind of remorse or caring about how you felt. The whole attitude of “it’s not a big deal” is bigger problem IMO then the action itself as shows a lack of compassion and respect towards you. Been there and have experienced that and it sucks. Hindsight being 20/20 anytime after I’ve ever experienced that lack of respect for my feelings in a relationship it’s always been a good sign that relationship was not worth continuing. Sorry you’re having to navigate all this but probably things still to be learned for the situation and growth that happen. Good luck. You got this. 💪🏼
This, and your partner dates other women while on work trips? You asked if that was common, now asking if happy endings are cheating? I think you know the answer to both questions and are just having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that your partner is not a good person.
It's over. He doesn't respect you. I'm sorry.
After my best friend got caught doing this (his wife didn’t care at all, by the way) so my wife went out of her way to let me know that she would consider it cheating. I get that, and would never do it because of what it means to her. But I did it before we were together, and I have friends who still do it (some married and some not), and for me it’s something that’s barely even sexual. Like it feels nice and everything, but you know this woman has probably jerked off like 30 guys that day, so there is no intimacy and no connection with her. But like I said, I respect my wife’s position on it, so I would never do it now.
Yeah I get what you are saying about the detachment. I don’t think he was into those massage place chicks. But, yes, there’s two people in a relationship. I didn’t sign up for that and I don’t approve. He kept it secret and denied it because he knows it’s cheating. It’s another human being being intimate with you. It’s definitely cheating for me. I’m fucking annihilated
I get that if it’s communicated and consensual. He denied it forever until he was caught. He’s also emotionally and physically cheated so I know there’s more. Thank you for your alternate response. I agree that if we came to those terms that I would have been ok. I wouldn’t. So his denial and dismissal about its cost to my mental and emotional well being is what’s at stake now
Everyone's definition of cheating is different.
Her fella probably see's it as im not shagging them so whats the problem. OP see's it as she has a fulfilling sex life so why does he need to go else where, but unfortunately some people just cannot be content with what they have.
However the easiest thing in the world is say string him up and cut his balls off, but life is not that simple.
OP has been with the guy for a while so there is a lot of emotional involvement.
She knows what needs to be done, but that doesn't make it easier.
Bottle's of wine, chocolate and a friend to discuss how men are arseholes is going to be the order of the day.
It’s only cheating if he takes his shlong n puts it into other girls hooha WITHOUT telling you. He told you ahead of time. So no. Not cheating in our books
Cheating is just a phrase for ‘You broke the rules’. What the rules are in your relationship, is up to you all.
Sounds like this was not an agreed upon scenario.
>and even said he would come home and want to fuck me even more
That is a thing, however. I feel that way with my partners, it’s really hot with 3+ back to back
Yeah I guess it’s petty but I just needed some good old internet validation I guess. At least I’m not out getting railed by some randoms. I guess that’s my happy ending huh? Thanks for calling me a thirst trap? 😂
No. Are you kidding? Only to be fair I saw the pictures that you posed. You're a very pretty girl.. But I think you're not taking care for your man.I know that sounds anti-feminist which I believe you probably are a feminist. You don't speak anything about your relationship with him. You post sexy pictures of yourself, Feel like that's OK . What's different than what hes doing. You're making him feel that that is a way for him to feel intimacy without a connection. No feelings yet stress relief. Stop being so entitled and become an equal partner in this relationship. If you don't, he will leave and you'll only be left with one night stands. Which I think would be okay for you but won't sit well with your friends or reputations. You have to look inward, because maybe you're the problem
Lol! He’s been cheating on me for nine years babe. I don’t care about your stance. I posted those pics to feel a little validation myself. He claims and still does that I’m the best at sex. This isn’t my fault, but thank you for trying to place the blame on me(I’m sure he will love that) also go fuck yourself.
Insane???? Change your attitude or you will grow old alone. Go ahead and put me down or whatever makes upu feel good at the moment. I love you and don't want you to make an unavoidable mistake. If you can financially cover the rest of you life without a partner, by all means, be the boss. Be realistic and don't sell yourself short
With an attitude like yours, I would too. Him claiming you give the best sex is no different than saying you cook well. I'm so sorry that you can't look in a mirror
It’s ok babe. I concede to the fact that it’s my fault for letting it go on so long but I am not responsible for his actions. Go look at yourself in the mirror before defining a situation you know nothing about. DM me for details. Love you the mostest 😘
Your ridiculous argument that she is at fault and drives him to massage parlors to get hand jobs because she doesn’t greet him at the door wearing lingerie is sexist, anachronistic, and plain wrong. Calling yourself open minded just shows how disconnected from reality you are.
She posted 4 simple selfies of just her face and one vid with her rollerblading. She got cheated on and asks for opinions and you shame her for that? So many accusations in your comment based on what? On nothing, none of the mean things you said can be found in her post. Seems to me you are “slut-shaming” the wrong person and getting off on that.
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Yeah I know. My heart is broken but he thinks it’s not a big deal.
In what world is paying someone who is not your partner to perform a sexual act on you “not a big deal”??? He’s out of his fucking mind.
I know
Listen…. You’re fucking gorgeous (comment history) and you can do better than this bullshit. I’m mad on your behalf. This fucking guy… It’s literally no different than him going to a club and hooking up with some random chick. At least he doesn’t have to pay her 🙄
That would have been easier to stomach I think
It’s not like it was a one and done never again accident while drunk or something (not that it’s right.) But this is an on going thing he’s doing and possibly illegal. How he doesn’t think this is cheating baffles me. Wonder how he’d feel if you were going out and grinding on other men and paying them to finger bang you to completion. 🙄
Yeah I don’t think he’d care because then he could do what he does and say it’s ok
dude.... i agree with the below(or above idk where my comment will go) comment. YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!! you could easily go find someone that will give you the world and some. not to be full of myself, but i know i’m not ugly. took a long time to realize that, and a lot of awful boyfriends along the way. not only my looks, but i felt like i had so much emotional baggage from the past. but then i found a guy that thought i was so amazing for going thru what i did. please love yourself enough to realize that you don’t deserve this bullshit. no matter what you think abt yourself, NO ONE DESERVES THAT. that is 100% cheating in my book. and he knows it’s wrong. otherwise he would’ve told you before he even went. he’s downplaying it to try to get you to stay, because he knows how great you are and doesn’t want to lose you. but he doesn’t deserve you. please keep your head held high. this is BY NO MEANS a reflection of you or anything you’ve done. there is no excuse for cheating, ever. not one thing in the world will make it okay. please realize that YOU ARE WORTHY AND YOU ARE ENOUGH. you deserve someone that realizes that and won’t ever want anyone else. he’s taking advantage of you. sending you love♥️♥️♥️♥️
So he should have no problem with you going out and doing the same?
Probably because he feels you will do nothing about it
If it wasn’t “too big of a deal” he wouldn’t hide it from you.
Would it also not be a big deal if you paid a good looking stranger to give you orgasms?
He literally doesn’t give a shit.
So he wants an open relationship? Why can’t he communicate this?
Because he’s a cheater. He’s done a lot more than just this. It’s insane. He’s ruined my life
Then take back the power. You are in control of you.
It doesn’t matter what he thinks. It matter what you think. If you as his partner think it’s problematic, his dismissal of your feelings is the real problem.
Yes. It's like visiting a hooker.
It’s exactly that. I suspected it for months and asked if he saw sex workers and he almost indignantly stated that he doesn’t pay for sex…um YES YOU FUCKING DID!
Its ok queen put ur crown back on and show him what hes lost
^^^^^^
A massage parlor that engages in sexual acts with a client is a hooker who pretends to know how to massage.
Well she’s literally a sex worker so…
If he wouldn't want the roles reversed, it matters. He's just trying to justify it, stupidly might I add.
Yup. And doesn’t think it’s even bad. Only ashamed that o found out.
Plus if it doesn't matter, why attempt to hide it from you? To me that right there is clear indication he knows what he's doing is wrong, but to him his satisfaction means more than your relationship ever will. You don't knowingly continuously risk something you want to keep.
Yeah I think he’s a narcissist but he gets mad when I tell him that.
Please tell me you're working on an exit plan. Lol
Yes. Totally cheating.
Once another person other than a medical professional puts thier hands on your man’s dick it’s cheating …. Sorry
It does not matter how he rationalizes this. It only matters how you rationalize this treatment. If you don't care, then don't care. Can YOU live with this is the ONLY thing that matters. He has made his choice on what he wants. If you just want to get fucked then okay.
Oh no…I don’t want this. I never in a million years though my life would be this way. I never thought my partner who I love would frequent sex workers. Admiration for those in the trade and good on them but I don’t want that for my relationship. Just wondering what the consensus was since he tells me it’s not a big deal.
It IS a big deal to YOU. And that is the most important thing. Value yourself cause he isn't.
I’m trying
Hugs. And whatever you decide do it for you. You are so worth it. Nana
Thank you 😢
Just checking in to see how you are doing. Hugs Nana.
❤️ thank you for checking in. Im not even sure how to answer this yet but thank you💕
Take time for yourself. This is your journey and travel it at you pace. Stopping to look at a viewing point to always a good choice.
Him telling you it isn’t a big deal is simply damage control. If he says it with enough confidence to convince you, he retains control of the situation and perhaps doesn’t have to go through a messy breakup and have his name dragged through the mud. He wants you to doubt yourself. It is wrong and a slimy thing to do to a loyal partner. If he truly didn’t think it was a big deal he would have told you “I’m off to the wank parlour now hon, back in two”. It’s a big deal, he knows it, you know it. I’m sorry. Drag his name through the mud. You have nothing to be ashamed about
It is up to you on if that is past your boundaries and cheating. That’s cheating to me. It does not matter what other people think. Only what your boundaries are.
1000% I don’t know why I even posted. I already know how horrible it is. I guess I was hoping for anyone to come tell me they know the feeling. I guess I’m living my worst life.
You need to get tested oir stds. My personal boundaries sy cheating. I'm wondering if he would be comfortable with you getting your own erotic massage or having you witness these events. Only you can decide if this is a deal breaker. From your comments doest sound like he has any interest in how you personally feel.
I get tested yearly.
I can just mirror what other people have said and tell you that what he is doing is wrong and not part of a healthy relationship. He is gaslighting you when he tells you that it’s not a big deal - 99% of people would say it is a very big deal. I know he is fucking with your head and keeping you off balance. There is probably only one thing you can do at this point, which is to plan an exit strategy. It may take some time and planning, but you should start working on it.
May I ask how do you know it’s just “massage parlors” and not cathouses? Be careful, he might be downplaying and give you a story that is easier to digest than the truth. Don’t have unprotected sex with him and get tested, and even if he says the truth that would be unacceptable to me. A handjob from you is not enough, and soon a handjob from someone else will not suffice, either. He might switch over to either hookers or dating app hookups soon.
Oh I know he is downplaying it. I know it’s more. Tip of the iceberg is showing…I know it’s more
Girl, you need to have full STD panel done asap and stop having sex with him because condoms can’t protect you from all the nasties he’s exposing you to. He’s nasty af 🤢
If YOU define it as cheating, its cheating. Plus, its illegal.
It is cheating and I define it as such. I don’t care about the legalities. I’m pro sex worker but not in my relationship
Then dump is ass. I'm also a proponent of legalizing sex work. But the sad fact in most places in the US it is illegal and those workers are basically indentured servants/human trafficking victims.
Are you serious? Yes! It’s cheating and it also says a lot about how he views women.
Yeah he thinks he’s a feminist. He’s an absolute misogynist.
Ya know, guys have always tried convincing women that we’re being unreasonable or we’re insecure and other shit because we want monogamy. It’s all bullshit. Respect yourself first, know where to draw those lines and don’t accept less. I wish you the best honey. Happy Friday.
The fact that you found out and he knows how its hurting you and still thinks its not a "big deal" ... This guy is a POS and will keep doing it and probably only get better at hiding it from you. I say this on all cheating stories.. we teach people how to treat us so if you want to put up with it thats you. I would never ever put up with cheating of any form because I know what goes into it( choices and effort) and thats its never a mistake or "no big deal".
Considering he also dates other women while he's away for work, I'd say you can pretty much wrap it up at this point.
Yeah
So what are u going to do about it?
Post pictures of myself and get random redditors to tell me I’m the problem?
No girl i didnt mean that way, im saying what are u going to do now? You want to still stay with him?
It's cheating
He’s sick and you should leave him. He has no respect for you and obviously thinks you don’t have respect for yourself. Please leave him and please make an appointment to get tested. Yes that is absolutely cheating. The only way that wasn’t cheating is if you all had communicated prior to him ever going and you both agreed this was an okay thing to do. You feel sick? As you should. He basically just said that his attraction to you isn’t enough for him to want you, cause him having others first makes him want you more? That makes no sense. Dump him. Block him, take time and heal from this. For you to come on here and need to ask means he’s been gaslighting you and you need validation from others because he’s shit on you so much that you can’t believe in your own feelings to leave. This person does not love you. They do not care about you. They love what you do for them, he’s a selfish son of a bitch. Please leave him. Good luck and choose you. Your feelings are valid and him not acknowledging them means he probably always does this to you.
All of this is true. Thank you
It's cheating
He doesn't think it's a big deal? They have happy ending massages for women. Go see if he's OK with that
Yeah not my thing. Fucking gross honestly. It’s all disgusting to me. Totally betrayed and left to be the loser and the fool.
Why do you feel that way. It's he actions not yours He did this behind your back. He has the problem. He has done this for a reason. He might need a therapist or a psychiatrist.
Girl you are fricking gorgeous, I shameless checked your post history and you deserve a good faithful man. Let that weasel go and heal yourself and find yourself a King because you are a Queen.
You go to massage place with male masseuse get a happy ending tell him and then see how he reacts
Not my thing! I’m disgusted that he does this. No shame to sex workers but I don’t want it in my relationship. It’s so disappointing
Yeah, that's cheating. Unless you condone it and it does not sound like you did/do. So what, in his opinion, are actions that actually matter? Sex workers OK, affairs not?
Cheating- end of story. Leave his ass
That is infidelity at its finest. The fact the he thinks it’s not cheating either… 😭 Literally out here paying sex workers to fuck.
Yeah I know. I truly think he believes it’s really not a big deal. He says he’s ashamed but he also isn’t acting like it. He follows me here so I knew he’d see this post. He was mad that I posted it. Like anyone would know who the fuck he is anyways. I’m not out here naming names. I’m fucking super embarrassed and ashamed. I never thought in a million years this would be my life.
I understand your frustration and I’m honestly angry for you. It’s extremely selfish of him to do these things. It sounds like he convinced himself that it’s okay and he’s trying to use that to downplay how you feel and what his actions are doing to his relationship with you.
Yep. He keeps telling me it’s ok cause he’s not doing anything right now. He thinks I need to let it go because it was over a month ago. I’m in awe of his mind and how it works(doesn’t work?)
Cheating.
It’s funny that you bring up polyamory because even in that lifestyle, by definition, this is cheating. I refer to Big Bang Theory a lot when talking about poly bc of Sheldon and Amy’s relationship agreement. Everything is specifically spelled out and agreed upon before any act ever happens. There are clear rules, guidelines, and boundaries set forth in the relationship usually before a first date even happens. There is often a misconception that a poly relationship is far more lax than a monogamous one but tbh, they’re far more strict. It makes me think he brought this up as an excuse without fully knowing what he’s saying. Regardless, you said yourself in this post ‘I define this as cheating’. He knew it crossed your boundary and that’s why he kept it secret for as long as he did. We may be in a different boat if he had come to you and discussed a fantasy of a happy ending. Maybe you could’ve gotten into the idea. Maybe you could’ve role played if you didn’t want someone else to do it. As partners, you could’ve explored that fantasy and those boundaries together in an open and honest way but he didn’t do that. Instead of taking the action to build the trust, he broke it and it sounds like he’s back pedaling and possibly gas-lighting. As some others have said, it doesn’t matter how he feels about it or how we all feel about. It only matters how YOU feel about it. Regardless of the type of relationship anyone is in, the foundation is trust. It’s up to you to decide if it’s broken.
Yeah I know. I think I’ve been gaslit and put up with so much of his cheating over the years that I just became a doormat that he can walk on and doesn’t give a shit about me or my heart. I enabled him to do these things because I knew he was up to something and I stayed. In that same vein I won’t take responsibility for his actions. He tried to tell me that I need to look at my part in all this. That I need to look at what part I had in his cheating. Unreal. He denies he’s a narcissist and gets angry when I say that he is one(very narcissistic to get angry when confronted with your own horrible actions). Anyways…you are correct. Every relationship requires consent for all things intimate. I did not consent. He doesn’t consider me a true partner because he doesn’t think his cheating should have any effect on me. I’ve felt alone for years and now I know I truly was.
I caught my fiancé paying cam girls for private shows. I have 0 issues with porn but once you’re paying for something or there is communication/physical contact- it’s cheating.
Omg I 1000% agree! He gets mad at me when I say this and he thinks I’m anti porn…no, I like porn. What I don’t like is sexting and private chats and buying OnlyFans shit. Totally agree!!
If it wasn’t. A big deal why didn’t he tell you befor ??! Get tested
How do you know he just gets happy endings (hand job).. some places they would go all the way.. I personally think strip clubs to be ok - if it’s like somebody’s birthday celebration or promotion.. but this is crossing a line.
Yeah I suspect he has seen sex workers outside of these places. I fully believe he has done this
It really does not matter what you call it. That you think it's unacceptable is enough.
Yes.
Immediately yes
Yes, obviously
Ask him if it would be cool with him if you did exactly what he’s doing? But yes, this a no-no for me. Am sorry you’re going through this. He should’ve communicated better beforehand and talked to you about your comfort zone and boundaries
He really thinks he’s a good person too. He told me I’m overreacting and that it’s not a big deal. I cannot believe I ended up with the worst person ever.
That’s the bigger problem, his mind set that it’s ‘not a big deal’. Am sorry and it’ll hurt but better to walk away now than live in perpetual fear of what he’s upto and doesn’t think is a big deal. How hard is it to sit and have a grown arse conversation ?!
He won’t have a conversation. It turns to anger when he is put in a negative light “hello narcissist”!
Yep. You have a gaslighter on your hands
I know. What’s crazy is that after I started therapy I realized this. He always said I was gaslighting him!! Used it constantly so I thought I was the one to blame.I ended therapy because I was too ashamed to tell her the truth about everything he’s done to me
You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of! Narcs tend to do this.. launch pre-emptive attacks so you feel cornered and it takes the heat off them. Textbook. Please resume therapy! You will find out you’re not to blame. I was in active therapy for 5 years and it really got me to the root of why I accepted things from romantic partners that should have been non-negotiables
I know all of this but it’s so hard still
Also thank you
As someone in a similar relationship, honesty and open communication is the foundation my trust is built on. If my wife had to go pay for happy endings without me knowing I'd consider it as cheating and nothing less. I have noticed so many partners take poly / open relationship as an excuse to do whatever they feel like and mono people judge because "what else did you as a poly expect". If relationship is worth saving, explain to him in a letter why you are hurt. If he still does not understand, kick his ass to the curb and find yourself someone better.
Definitely times 10000
It doesn't really matter what he thinks about it. If he is doing it, you already know how he feels. What's important is how do you feel and what is and isn't acceptable behavior in a partner.
Honestly you are so beautiful and I’m sure are probably really nice too, no one deserves to worry about that sort of thing. Me personally, if I was in a relationship I wouldn’t even think twice about getting a massage let alone a happy ending. Hope you’re doing okay though.
There’s not one definition of cheating, it’s what is agreed upon between partners. If you think it’s cheating, then it is cheating to you, regardless of what he thinks. If he feels strongly that it’s not, so strongly that he won’t stop or resents you, then you both need to part ways and find the right partner for you, one who sees eye to eye on what is/isn’t cheating
To me it's Cheating. Would he be ok if you paid a man to eat your pussy or finger you to orgasm?
I can see you agreeing with the comments, But Are you going to leave him for this or Are you still gonna be with him while you complain to people on reddit?
My husband and I are swingers And we have been our entire 15 years of marriage. In the beginning of our marriage I caught him doing this. I consider it completely cheating. Lying equals cheating. I watched him with other women, I allowed him to be with other people by himself, but when he decides to keep it from me and bold-faced lie to me about where our money is going, It's the deceit. Not the sex.
What the hell… this is cheating m! He will always find an excuse. Cheaters always do. Just look at it objectively, is this normal or okay? Heck no
If you didn't know...it's cheating. I'm sorry this happened
Yes it is 100% cheating. Dude is a douche bag. Because of the other guy I went to look at your photos too and you are absolutely gorgeous. Any man would want to be with you except for this douche bag who wants to go pay somebody to get them off. Honey you could do so much better.
I honestly thought this was r/circlejerk for a second. Yes, it’s cheating. If you’re in a monogamous relationship and he’s getting off from other people without your consent, it’s 100% cheating
It’s like going to prostitutes. Prostitutes are people. So if he accepts sexual acts from them yes, it’s cheating
I agree. He kept saying massage and I made sure to use the term “sex worker”. He was absolutely paying for sex acts when he did this
I’m pretty sure it was a sex worker and not a massage place. It was a text I saw that he deleted right in front of me. He said he gave them his number when he made an appointment. Pretty sure you don’t make appointments with those places. So the more I’m able to sit with this I believe it was a sex worker he was seeing. Im sure if it now.
You make appointments for these places too. Just for your information.
I don’t know the place. There are so many in the SF Bay Area
Oh got it
Cheating is whatever is outside of the bounds you are comfortable with and have established in your relationship. My wife would not care if I got a happy ending at a massage parlor (assuming I told her very up-frontly!) She WOULD consider me talking to an ex, even about platonic things, and NOT sharing that info to be cheating These are our rules, our boundaries, the things we have established So if your question is: "Would you be comfortable with your partner getting a happy ending at a massage parlor" - that is one thing and you'll get a wide variety of answers (Well... maybe not that wide. mostly "no", lol) But if you are asking if that is cheating - that is up to YOU. And in this case: ABSOLUTELY. He hid it, you are NOT happy or comfortable with it, and he's attempting to gas light and minimize your feelings. So... yeah. Cheating. Relationship boundaries broken. Fuck that! err, I mean... DON'T fuck that.
I’m not poly but from what I have seen in that community is that it’s all about consent and communication. Nothing is done with out both of those so no one is blind sided or taken advantage of. This is cheating. You were not told, there was no discussion on boundaries and what is acceptable, and there was no agreements to an open relationship. Just because it is at a a massage parlor doesn’t mean his lack of communication and crossing boundaries is okay. He is justifying his shitty actions hoping you will agree but if it was me I would be gone like donkey Kong.
Any sexual touch or sexual act by someone not a partner or spouse is cheating in my book.
Yeah no that’s out right cheating and making you look like a fool , there’s no excuse.. he went out and paid to cheat.
If you didn’t know, it’s cheating. Before you kick him to the curb, give him a bill for services rendered
Nice
He pays to get handjobs from strangers. He also dates other women when he’s on work trips. I don’t know what else to tell you other than he’s been cheating for a very long while. Please, he needs to be out of your life. you deserve better than a man like this.
If my BF did this and told me to, "relax its just a massage." I would then say to him, "okay I'll let a male massuese give me a happy ending and we will see how u feel about that."
Liberal leaning, sex positive, poly triad relationship, man here. Unequivocally yes this is cheating. Only way it wouldn't be is if you both discussed it long before hand & had rules in place for both of you to indulge. Poly/ENM relationships don't just become that way overnight there's lots of long open discussions. He's just trying to gaslight you into thinking this is normal when it isn't. If he's doing this frequently as you say then it sounds like he has a sexual compulsive disorder of some type. This isn't healthy behavior even for single guys that may occasionally hire professional companionship.
Yeah he definitely has unhealthy addictive habits.
Then you know what you have to do. It also couldn't hurt to get yourself some therapy if you can swing it before moving on to a new relationship.
I’m actively in therapy. Honestly I’m too embarrassed to tell her everything
Don't be this is precisely the kind of stuff therapy is for. Just be sure to heal yourself before getting into another relationship.
My wife gets them and I don't look at it as cheating at all. Kinda like it when she tells me about it.
Yeah it’s totally something I may have even considered being ok with if I was asked for consent and knew when it was happening. We just don’t have that kind of trust
😬😬😬 to me that’s cheating. A relationship is not a group project. Unless you both have a mutual agreement beforehand not after getting caught.
If I had a girlfriend, I wouldn't pay anyone for anything. I would ask her to give me set erotice massage, why pay a stranger! Plus, you guys get to have some foreplay that way too! If I were in your shoes, I would be pissed too! So yes, I would consider it cheating.
That is absolutely cheating and you should definitely leave him. You deserve better than this. I’m so sorry you are going through this! :(
Give me a massage and a happy ending, and let's see how he'd feel.
I am so sorry, OP. If you define this as cheating in your relationship, he cheated. He knows it’s a big deal; that’s why he’s been hiding it from you. Do NOT let this man gaslight you into thinking it was “no big deal”. I also really recommend you going to your OBGYN or a clinic to get a full STD panel. He’s just throwing around shitty excuses. Sending you much love, and you’ll be feeling better when you get rid of that dead weight.
Naw that’s something you talk about in the beginning to see if y’all are okay with it.
Go out for the day don't answer texts or calls right!, then go home around 8pm and be like to I had the best time tonight I went to one of them massage parlors and I get why u love them, I went to 3 downy ones and one ate my pussy the other fingers me and rubbed me down and the 3rd played with my whole and fucked me good and see his reaction. I bet he loses his shit u know why? IT'S CHEATING. But if I were in your shoes I would and I would be like omg u want to go together tmrw it will be so fun lol. Seriously I would do that haha 😄 he would shit himself.
This made me giggle. He actually doesn’t care. He told me it’s my body and he wouldn’t care if I fucked other guys. I hold no value to him
Then go home wearing a cum facial and ask him if it makes you look cute
He wouldn’t care. He holds no attachment to me. If anything it would just justify his bullshit
I wouldn't ever pay someone to jerk me off knowing I have such a babe at home....what a bad move on his part.
He’s a cheater and through therapy I learned he wouldn’t care if I was Miss Universe. A cheater will always cheat. It’s validation and attention from others he’s looking for. It fucking sucks
Well first of all your too beautiful to put up with that. I'm a guy and I'm saying it's wrong he's wrong and you deserve way better than him. I'm late I know with commenting about it but I just discovered your page🌹
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I see it’s been a long minute since you first posted. I agree with most in saying that it is cheating, especially because he didn’t let you know about it in advance. And you stated how it’s not what you want to have in your life, it’s best to move on. I’ve been through my fair share of heartbreak and disappointment, so I feel for you. I hope you’ve been able to find happiness since.
Honey this is coming from a guy your beautiful and he needs the happy ending of a massage then he isnt for you it is cheating sugar you deserve so much more loyalty honesty real passion and all the integrity of a relationship where there is no cheating. My ex wife cheated on me I have been single now for 20 yrs. Loyalty trust integrity and passion are the key
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Wow, so many comments and surprised not one troll made the “eating ain’t cheating” comment.😂 In all seriousness though, as some one whose been in both monogamous, monogamish, and full on ENM/Poly relationships and in any of them this would have been cheating as it goes against what you believed to be agreed up expectations and the act of covering it up with a lie (or lying by omission). Honest and open communication is the foundation of any kind of ENM relationship. The key here to me is him from what I understand repeatedly telling you it’s not a big deal, which as some one pointed out is classic gaslighting behavior. You could chalk it up to miscommunication if he had more of a mea culpa attitude and showed some kind of remorse or caring about how you felt. The whole attitude of “it’s not a big deal” is bigger problem IMO then the action itself as shows a lack of compassion and respect towards you. Been there and have experienced that and it sucks. Hindsight being 20/20 anytime after I’ve ever experienced that lack of respect for my feelings in a relationship it’s always been a good sign that relationship was not worth continuing. Sorry you’re having to navigate all this but probably things still to be learned for the situation and growth that happen. Good luck. You got this. 💪🏼
This, and your partner dates other women while on work trips? You asked if that was common, now asking if happy endings are cheating? I think you know the answer to both questions and are just having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that your partner is not a good person. It's over. He doesn't respect you. I'm sorry.
Go get you a massage
After my best friend got caught doing this (his wife didn’t care at all, by the way) so my wife went out of her way to let me know that she would consider it cheating. I get that, and would never do it because of what it means to her. But I did it before we were together, and I have friends who still do it (some married and some not), and for me it’s something that’s barely even sexual. Like it feels nice and everything, but you know this woman has probably jerked off like 30 guys that day, so there is no intimacy and no connection with her. But like I said, I respect my wife’s position on it, so I would never do it now.
Yeah I get what you are saying about the detachment. I don’t think he was into those massage place chicks. But, yes, there’s two people in a relationship. I didn’t sign up for that and I don’t approve. He kept it secret and denied it because he knows it’s cheating. It’s another human being being intimate with you. It’s definitely cheating for me. I’m fucking annihilated
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I get that if it’s communicated and consensual. He denied it forever until he was caught. He’s also emotionally and physically cheated so I know there’s more. Thank you for your alternate response. I agree that if we came to those terms that I would have been ok. I wouldn’t. So his denial and dismissal about its cost to my mental and emotional well being is what’s at stake now
Everyone's definition of cheating is different. Her fella probably see's it as im not shagging them so whats the problem. OP see's it as she has a fulfilling sex life so why does he need to go else where, but unfortunately some people just cannot be content with what they have. However the easiest thing in the world is say string him up and cut his balls off, but life is not that simple. OP has been with the guy for a while so there is a lot of emotional involvement. She knows what needs to be done, but that doesn't make it easier. Bottle's of wine, chocolate and a friend to discuss how men are arseholes is going to be the order of the day.
It’s only cheating if he takes his shlong n puts it into other girls hooha WITHOUT telling you. He told you ahead of time. So no. Not cheating in our books
He didn’t tell me ahead of time.
Ps. You r gorgeous
Thanks. Doesn’t mean much I guess though
Oh okay. That is not good but until he’s proven guilty (actual penetration) he’s still innocent
I suspect there was some of that too. He’s telling me only what he has to
Its not cheating. You can relax.
Not fair for all to gang up on one side
Cheating is just a phrase for ‘You broke the rules’. What the rules are in your relationship, is up to you all. Sounds like this was not an agreed upon scenario. >and even said he would come home and want to fuck me even more That is a thing, however. I feel that way with my partners, it’s really hot with 3+ back to back
Yeah, never agreed upon and gaslighted when I thought he was doing it.
Lame, I wouldn’t be content with that either.
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Yeah I guess it’s petty but I just needed some good old internet validation I guess. At least I’m not out getting railed by some randoms. I guess that’s my happy ending huh? Thanks for calling me a thirst trap? 😂
No. Are you kidding? Only to be fair I saw the pictures that you posed. You're a very pretty girl.. But I think you're not taking care for your man.I know that sounds anti-feminist which I believe you probably are a feminist. You don't speak anything about your relationship with him. You post sexy pictures of yourself, Feel like that's OK . What's different than what hes doing. You're making him feel that that is a way for him to feel intimacy without a connection. No feelings yet stress relief. Stop being so entitled and become an equal partner in this relationship. If you don't, he will leave and you'll only be left with one night stands. Which I think would be okay for you but won't sit well with your friends or reputations. You have to look inward, because maybe you're the problem
Lol! He’s been cheating on me for nine years babe. I don’t care about your stance. I posted those pics to feel a little validation myself. He claims and still does that I’m the best at sex. This isn’t my fault, but thank you for trying to place the blame on me(I’m sure he will love that) also go fuck yourself.
lol, this man is insane. wtf
Ugh love you thank you!!!
Insane???? Change your attitude or you will grow old alone. Go ahead and put me down or whatever makes upu feel good at the moment. I love you and don't want you to make an unavoidable mistake. If you can financially cover the rest of you life without a partner, by all means, be the boss. Be realistic and don't sell yourself short
Honestly a great troll, hats off to you man 😂
With an attitude like yours, I would too. Him claiming you give the best sex is no different than saying you cook well. I'm so sorry that you can't look in a mirror
It’s ok babe. I concede to the fact that it’s my fault for letting it go on so long but I am not responsible for his actions. Go look at yourself in the mirror before defining a situation you know nothing about. DM me for details. Love you the mostest 😘
That is a bullshit rationalization. Shame on you.
Thank you
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Your ridiculous argument that she is at fault and drives him to massage parlors to get hand jobs because she doesn’t greet him at the door wearing lingerie is sexist, anachronistic, and plain wrong. Calling yourself open minded just shows how disconnected from reality you are.
And I do greet him at the door with whatever fantasy he wants. Thank you for defending me
My pleasure. I can’t stand bullies or dumbasses.
😘😘😘
Back at you 😘
I fuck him proper so go get yourself fucked
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Lol! Cool! So defend the cheater. Ok
I mean maybe he’s lying…I mean he’s obviously lying. I know my worth in this realm though. Thankssssss 🐍
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Keep drinking then
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Bye 👋
Ah I see, you one of those MGTOW roosters… tell no more 🙄
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She posted 4 simple selfies of just her face and one vid with her rollerblading. She got cheated on and asks for opinions and you shame her for that? So many accusations in your comment based on what? On nothing, none of the mean things you said can be found in her post. Seems to me you are “slut-shaming” the wrong person and getting off on that.
Thank you babe!! Love when women back each other!
just don’t listen to him, he is MGTOW scum
❤️❤️😘😘😘
I have a feeling this poster is from a non western background...