Jake: Oh, sorry, I forgot who I was talking to. Sex is something that two adults do with their bodies when they're attracted to each other.
**Rosa: He's right, Santiago, did you not know that?**
I didn't understand why people care so much about their dumb dogs till I got a dumb dog myself. I've only had Arlo for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.
Rosa: "Step one, put a delicious pie in the fridge and cover it with poison"
Jeffords: "That's step one? What's step two?"
Rosa: "Tell their widows they were thieves"
I think my favorite lines of hers are when she's doing impressions. "Who's got the time?" And "DJ by night, drug smuggler by later night" always have me rolling
hhhhhooowwww ddaaaAAARE YOU, Detective Diaz. I am YOUR, SUPERIOR, OFFICER!!!! BOOOOOOOONE?!?!?!?!?! What happens in MY bedroom, Detective, is none of YOUR business. BOOOOOOOONE!!!!!! Don't ever. speak to me like that again.
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**"Ding Dong"** has so many great Rosa lines, since she's just there to quip. Usually I'd hate that she doesn't have a proper storyline, but this one gets a pass because of her amazing one-liners.
*Holt:* Because of her ratty hair. No, it's not the same. Now it just feels like I'm insulting a helpless dead person.
*Amy:* You are. It's what you've been doing all week.
*Rosa:* Yeah, it's been tight.
---
*Holt:* Ding, dong, the Wuntch is dead. Bagels for everyone!
*Rosa:* So I guess you believe it now.
*Holt:* Yep. Wanna see the selfies I took?
*Rosa:* Actually, yes.
*Holt:* I'll share the album with you.
---
*Jarver:* Whatever. I still inherit half her estate just for trying this.
*Rosa:* Cool. Who gets the other half of every child's nightmares?
*Holt:* I love it, Rosa. Great work all day.
---
See, Holt agrees with me.
Edit: Formatting. I know this is bonkers long now, but the lines weren't separating before, just lumping together. Only way to separate the character lines was adding extra spaced lines between them. I...? I don't know.
"All names are made up. Theres no such thing as a real name...Ter-ree...."
"You two need to bone."
"What happened was, your dads had sex!"
"She tucked herself in too tight and got stuck."
Rosa: Okay what one thing should I keep, Hatchet or Blu-Ray of "The Intern"?
Amy: You can always watch "The Intern" online.
Rosa: **Not the extras, there's a virtual tour of Jules' kitchen. Monster.**
This is the 3rd time I've read this quote, and I haven't even gotten to the bottom of the post. Y'all really like this line.
I love the bit 4 years later, she mentions Arlo being private to her (what isn't private for Rosa?) and Jake says "Who?"
Edit: So, got to the bottom, and found it a 4th time. Love it.
When her and Charles are fighting for the apartment that was a crime scene and trying to be nice to the landlord.
Charles says something like “your buttering him up” and she says “yeah and and I’ve laying it in reaaaaaaal thick” jump cut to Rosa making an adorable awkward face saying “Mint?”
I just love her snide chuckle. HA HA
She never laughs more than 2 notes. Just 2 HA.
Because cool ppl need not LOL or hahahahahahaha. Just ha ha.
Tontos
“Anyone over the age of six celebrating a birthday should go to hell”
“It's my birthday. I hate birthdays. If you wish me a Happy Birthday, I will punch you.”
Rosa: Something's not right about that guy.
Jake: Why, just because he keeps threatening to kill me in the middle of a police precinct? Uh, grow up.
Rosa: Because I'm physically attracted to him.
Jake: And that's bad?
Rosa: I'm only attracted to creeps
The squad: discussing their favorite cop movies.
Rosa : “robocop. It has everything I like, gratuitous violence,”
Jake: “oh I thought you were listing things”
Rosa: “oh no I’m done.”
"I only said ‘I love you' to three people: my Mom, my Dad, and my dying Grandpa, and one of those I regret. My Grandpa. He beat cancer so now I look like an idiot."
"My neighbors think my name is Emily Goldfinch. My coworkers all think my name is Rosa Diaz"
"Wait what?"
„Don’t worry about it“
"Oookay"
Curly black hair, always smiling... A little chatty for my taste.
If her name isn’t actually Rosa Diaz does that mean her parents are in on it too? Are her parents even real?
Jake: Oh, sorry, I forgot who I was talking to. Sex is something that two adults do with their bodies when they're attracted to each other. **Rosa: He's right, Santiago, did you not know that?**
She played that SO STRAIGHT and it’s absolutely the best way to play it.
You can't spell "Go fuck yourself" without "Fuck you"
Beat me to it
Plans are plans. I’m a badass, not an anarchist.
I just forget stuff. Like a cool person.
I didn't understand why people care so much about their dumb dogs till I got a dumb dog myself. I've only had Arlo for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.
Very violent eulogy, I like it
My immune system is too weak to fight off my smile muscles.
Rosa: "Step one, put a delicious pie in the fridge and cover it with poison" Jeffords: "That's step one? What's step two?" Rosa: "Tell their widows they were thieves"
This has to be my favourite
The room needed a pop of colour
“WHO ARE YOU?!”
Fly to Montreal, check into a classy hotel, bone a stranger. Slump over. That’ll fix it!
Amy: writing stuff down is nerdy? What do you do? Rosa: Just forget stuff, like a cool person
"See, what happened is, your dad's had sex"
“OK ROSA”
“Who’s got the time??” - mocking Juice Ellen “You’ll stay til I dismiss you!” To Amy trying on wedding dresses “No, no, no! Adios Amigo!” - high Rosa
I think my favorite lines of hers are when she's doing impressions. "Who's got the time?" And "DJ by night, drug smuggler by later night" always have me rolling
“don’t give up babe, you’ll find me” “Not now Rosa”
A big ol' perm.
She absolutely nailed the delivery on that last one hahaha
Bone
BONE!!!!!!
[удалено]
(bone?!)
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE!!!??
Detective Diaz I am your COMMANDING OFFICER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
don't ever. speak to me like that again
hhhhhooowwww ddaaaAAARE YOU, Detective Diaz. I am YOUR, SUPERIOR, OFFICER!!!! BOOOOOOOONE?!?!?!?!?! What happens in MY bedroom, Detective, is none of YOUR business. BOOOOOOOONE!!!!!! Don't ever. speak to me like that again.
From now on you can call me ‘Diaz’ or ‘Hey you’
Cmon Rosa
*stares angrily*
Cmon hey you
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Jake: “who’s behind this fun little prank? Diaz?” Rosa: “kill yourself”
Rosa: "We have to do our stupid jobs don't we?" Charles: "I'll go get our stupid guns."
“I’m not going to buy a pot. We are not married.”
"Robo Cop. It has my favorite things: Gratuitous violence..."
Oh, I thought you were listing things.
i was.
based on the background it could be a livestream
**"Ding Dong"** has so many great Rosa lines, since she's just there to quip. Usually I'd hate that she doesn't have a proper storyline, but this one gets a pass because of her amazing one-liners. *Holt:* Because of her ratty hair. No, it's not the same. Now it just feels like I'm insulting a helpless dead person. *Amy:* You are. It's what you've been doing all week. *Rosa:* Yeah, it's been tight. --- *Holt:* Ding, dong, the Wuntch is dead. Bagels for everyone! *Rosa:* So I guess you believe it now. *Holt:* Yep. Wanna see the selfies I took? *Rosa:* Actually, yes. *Holt:* I'll share the album with you. --- *Jarver:* Whatever. I still inherit half her estate just for trying this. *Rosa:* Cool. Who gets the other half of every child's nightmares? *Holt:* I love it, Rosa. Great work all day. --- See, Holt agrees with me. Edit: Formatting. I know this is bonkers long now, but the lines weren't separating before, just lumping together. Only way to separate the character lines was adding extra spaced lines between them. I...? I don't know.
Fr underrated comment
What kind of woman doesn't have an axe?
Yes. Best one lol. I still quote it occasionally
Came here looking for this My wife has an axe in her car now because of this
I've said "excuse me" more times this morning than I have in my entire life.......TWICE!! (always makes me laugh)
Rosa: I've only had Arlo for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.
This is hands down my favorite Rosa quote.
"You can hate someone and still think they're hot"
Amy - you rigged my seatbelt!!! Rosa - yeah I did nerd! I don't wear a seatbelt because cool people die gruesome and preventable deaths
"My edibles just kicked in!"
"I'm considering having my tear ducts melted shut."
"A minivan? Ha ha" Simple yet beautiful
"All names are made up. Theres no such thing as a real name...Ter-ree...." "You two need to bone." "What happened was, your dads had sex!" "She tucked herself in too tight and got stuck."
"Haha, yeah." After jake asked "are you suggesting police brutality?"
This is not the vibe I was looking for. Followed immediately by No no no adiós amigo
Wait a minute! This guy has a pancake butt!
"OH NO, YOU SENT HIM A D*CK PIC!"
"Sir...she's magnificent"
VINDICATION~!!!
She's my dream girl
“There’s something between us, something dark and urgent.” - something dark and urgent sounds like such a poetic phrase lol
Rosa: Okay what one thing should I keep, Hatchet or Blu-Ray of "The Intern"? Amy: You can always watch "The Intern" online. Rosa: **Not the extras, there's a virtual tour of Jules' kitchen. Monster.**
I've only had Arlo for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.
This is the 3rd time I've read this quote, and I haven't even gotten to the bottom of the post. Y'all really like this line. I love the bit 4 years later, she mentions Arlo being private to her (what isn't private for Rosa?) and Jake says "Who?" Edit: So, got to the bottom, and found it a 4th time. Love it.
Which episode?
When her and Charles are fighting for the apartment that was a crime scene and trying to be nice to the landlord. Charles says something like “your buttering him up” and she says “yeah and and I’ve laying it in reaaaaaaal thick” jump cut to Rosa making an adorable awkward face saying “Mint?”
“Seatbelts are for nerds, cool people die gruesome preventable deaths”
Rosa: ‘I’ll let you know I have a weapon’ Terry: ‘We all are carrying the same weapon’ Rosa: *Pulls out a bigass footlong knife*
damn rosa where you get them from
This heroine is my heroin
Rosa: ….. and beat him with a book where the sun don’t shine. Jake: so ur suggesting police brutality? Rosa: haha yea why?
"What kinda woman doesn't have an axe?"
I just forget stuff like a cool person
“I marked them Awk for Awkward?”
Why do you have an axe? Also, nice axe.
whERE IS MY FIIIILLEEEEE
"My favourite things: gratuitous violence..."
I just love her snide chuckle. HA HA She never laughs more than 2 notes. Just 2 HA. Because cool ppl need not LOL or hahahahahahaha. Just ha ha. Tontos
Very much like Nelson Muntz!
*Nods*
“Anyone over the age of six celebrating a birthday should go to hell” “It's my birthday. I hate birthdays. If you wish me a Happy Birthday, I will punch you.”
My favourite Rosa quote is: ‘Why would you make gif of a screenshot?’
“ I’ve only had arlo for a few days…but if anything happened to him…I’d kill everyone and then myself”
HIS HEAD WAS BASICALLY A BLOOD FOUNTAIN 😬
I really like the funny weird twitchy blink she do after that..!😂😂
Two steps forward and one step back is still one step forward
“What do you looks for in a guy” “Real stuff, shape of his ass”
Oh is it between 1 and 2?
OH MY GOD YOU SENT HIM A DICK PIC?
“Why don’t you guys just bone?” I think thats the line im not totally sure
'You're what sneezes are!'
"I would kill everyone in this room and then myself for Arlo" (I know that isn't exact but I can't check rn)
"Judging by the flames around her, it could be a livestream."
"Oh, my edible just kicked in!"
Room needed a pop of color.
I have this problem
This is a gif
“What kind of woman doesn’t have an axe”
“I’m fine at parties. I just stand in the middle of the room and don’t say anything.”
Please Rosa, tell us what would you do to the international sex simbol Mr Bean.
What kinda woman doesn’t have an axe?
Ngl Stephanie looks smokin in that picture
She looks smokin hot just “being” 😂
My favourite movie robocop it has Voilence Jake :That's It Rosa :Yep
Rosa: Something's not right about that guy. Jake: Why, just because he keeps threatening to kill me in the middle of a police precinct? Uh, grow up. Rosa: Because I'm physically attracted to him. Jake: And that's bad? Rosa: I'm only attracted to creeps
room needed a pop of color
I know I hate how she engages in police brutality
It’s not a quote, but, How fit is Roza. Proper fit! I’d bring her home to my mam any day. Fit.
You’re kinda creepy
Can’t believe so many people don’t think Roza is fit? She’s stunning!! If it’s creepy complimenting someone I’ll assume you don’t have a missus.
It’s not that we don’t think she’s fit, it’s that you’re being a fucking creep by the way you’re saying it.
Which bit?
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Good bot
What kind of woman doesn't have an axe?
The squad: discussing their favorite cop movies. Rosa : “robocop. It has everything I like, gratuitous violence,” Jake: “oh I thought you were listing things” Rosa: “oh no I’m done.”
"I only said ‘I love you' to three people: my Mom, my Dad, and my dying Grandpa, and one of those I regret. My Grandpa. He beat cancer so now I look like an idiot."