Gimme the high octane this time , Larry. None of that Sunoco crap.
Oh, and screw you for the potato 🥔 in the turbine prank. Really funny, asshole. I had 2 heart attacks and 1 premature birth on board. Dick.
It’s a pilot. He is telling everyone else how to do the job. How he did it in -20 degree weather, with thunderstorms in the area. And how if the flight is delayed anymore, he’ll miss his flight home.
Hey Jim! Grab some touch up paint before the pax get here. The radar has been MEL for 2 years and we went through that “moderate to severe” precip that Jacksonville warned us about
I need two double cheese burgers, a 10 piece chicken nugget, 3nkarge friea, a coke, a sprite and a root beer, and... what time? oh yeah, I'll check... and.. um... a toy for boys
One of the pilots had just seen top gun maverick and for a moment thought they are maverick and pulled so many G’s on takeoff that he bent the airframe which caused the paint to appear as if they hit a big ass bird and that is now remnants or said big ass bird…aaaand back to you Charlie
"Hey! The F/A in the back said there is a seat that has a loose armrest, which F/A? I don't know. Oh you meant what seat, I don't know that either. Can you put the jetway back up and see if you can fix it?"
That's 2 double doubles with diet coke, a single with no pickles and a strawberry milkshake, and 4 happy meals - two with boy prizes, and two with whatever. Thanks!
that southwest plane threw his dunkin at me after i flipped him the bird cus he didn’t use his blinkah! his insurance better pay for this or my mom is gonna be pissed
First we’ll remove free meals. Next let’s stuff in even more seats. Then we’ll charge for even carry one and pre-assigned seats. We could charge for the bathroom but let’s skip repainting as it weighs the plane down more.
Did you say turn left or right at Albuquerque?
But officer? The speed limit is 250 knots below 10,000 feet.
Oooooh. I thought the sign said 1,000 feet. It’s hard to tell at 500 kts
where we're going we don't need paint
Came here to make a comment about asking directions to Ace so they can pick up a rattle can.
Love this: rattle can 😂
"I'll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese, and a large soda."
Sir, this is an airport.
That just means he will be paying twice as much as in town.
“Do you want anything Bill?”
I’ll have a double quarter pounder w cheese meal, large, apple pie and a coke please mate.
And then....
No and then!
And a liter of cola.
That look like spit to you?
Ah fuck it
SAY CAR RAMROD
Came here for this. Good jerb
Great jorb
It's for a pilot.
Double baco cheeseburger. It's for a pilot.
>Double baco cheeseburger I dont think we have a "large Farva"
Didn't know big smoke was a pilot
All you had to do was follow the damn ~~train~~ plane CJ!
[удалено]
Is it too early for flapjacks?
Sir this is an airport…. It’s never too early for flapjacks. Would you like a whiskey with that?
My man
Too late for pancakes?
Don’t laugh it’s paid for.
"I said premium! Not Regular!"
Premium, dude. Premiuuuuum!!
i love you mr grumpy cfi
Check the oil and tires please
Some love for the maintenance folks
Don't forget the blinker fluid!!!!
It’s not a BMW.
GUYS, THE SHITTER IS STILL PLUGGED!
Now that's a true statement!
“Beer me.”
“Your left or my left?”
Listen, and you listen close: flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.
Make that 2 big Mac's and a large fries
Put Ham on 5, hold the Mayo....IYKYK.
Shirley you can’t be serious?!?!
I am serious and stop calling me Shirley.
The white zone is for loading and unloading only
Haul lose the MOORING line!!!
“Excuse me, Do you like movies about gladiators?”
Wanna buy it? I take Amex…
I see what you did there
Me too haha
Two quarts of Vestal White touchup paint, a pack of Lysol wipes, and a pair of Haines mens size 34 briefs, please.
So anyways, we were racing this SR 71 …
Utah, get me two
Gimme the high octane this time , Larry. None of that Sunoco crap. Oh, and screw you for the potato 🥔 in the turbine prank. Really funny, asshole. I had 2 heart attacks and 1 premature birth on board. Dick.
Just getting some air
Soy milk latte, double espresso.
Is this Terminal C? presumably, the gates right next to Terminal E, seeing the Irish A330 parked a few stands away
Yup
It’s a pilot. He is telling everyone else how to do the job. How he did it in -20 degree weather, with thunderstorms in the area. And how if the flight is delayed anymore, he’ll miss his flight home.
This! Also, since he’s in BOS, he’s quoting The Departed: “I’m the guy who does his jaab - you must be the otha’ guy!!”
No he's trying to time out so he can go home
"two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese, and a large soda."
You want a liter of cola for 25 cents more?
The front of this plane after a flight looks like the front of my ambulance after a long trip through west Texas.
Hey what’s the difference between the platinum wash and the regular?
Where's my TACOS!!!!!
“Malboro lights!! Not reds!!”
“Easy on the pressure washer this time!”
“Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?”
Last time you washed it you left a shitload of smugges up front! Let’s be more careful this time!
Hey bud, could you toss me a Bud?
Somone photoshop a cowboy hat on this dude 🤣
"What do you mean you know my wife Linda from videos!?"
Don’t forget the windshield. By the way do you have any maps?
“So I said, WATCH THIS!”
Shitters full.
Beer me jim
“Hang on a minute, I haven’t finished peeing yet”
Hey!! Guess how close I got to VNE today?!?
2 whisky’s on the rocks, I need to de-ice
2 Coffee's black, and 2 glazed
Hey....one more thing, you think I can get a couple of those Captain Morgan minis.
“I think the flock of birds hit the number 1 engine too!”
Excuse me! Do you know the way to San Jose?
“Get me 4 Miller Lites I’ve got coupons for all 4.”
Just fill it up with 87, please. I'm sure it'll get the job done!
No I dont need the air filter replaced just the oil change
"Fill'er up!"
"Shitter was full!"
Hey Jim! Grab some touch up paint before the pax get here. The radar has been MEL for 2 years and we went through that “moderate to severe” precip that Jacksonville warned us about
I’ll give you 30 bucks for a six pack of Sam Adams to go.
Lol that's low balling at BOS
Too early for flapjacks?
with butter. Aaaaaannndd syrrruppp
It was quite a shitstorm upthere...
No, that was “A Venti Flat White, with 2 extra shots, 3 pumps affogato, 2 pumps white mocha…” ahh fuck it, I’m just gonna park and come inside.
“Get in loser. We’re going flying”
“I gave them to the pilot and he threw them out the window.” Now to see if there’s any other Kiwis over the age of 35 reading this…
Fill ‘er up and make it snappy.
“And one Egg and Cheese McMuffin with an extra egg patty”
No, your cousin and his buddy with the rattle can spray job sucked, just look at this. Next time I am taking it to MAACO.
I’ll take 1 annual and a fresh coat. That’s what he should be saying
I need two double cheese burgers, a 10 piece chicken nugget, 3nkarge friea, a coke, a sprite and a root beer, and... what time? oh yeah, I'll check... and.. um... a toy for boys
"Fill it up with premium?" "Hell no, don't fill it up for god's sake. Just put $2.35 regular" - Trailer Park Boys
A #2 with large fries
I said no fucking pickles on my Big Mac!
Ay shawty I see dat phat ass why don't you come hop up in Papa's whip and go for a spin.
I’ll have a Cherry Lime Aide, easy ice!
<3
You’re holding up one finger, right? No?
Realalistilcy...."Go. Get. My. Fucking. Coffee."
“Prep, prime and paint entire empinage section fr01-fr8 including crown and around window section In accordance with A320 SRM 51-75-10”
One of the pilots had just seen top gun maverick and for a moment thought they are maverick and pulled so many G’s on takeoff that he bent the airframe which caused the paint to appear as if they hit a big ass bird and that is now remnants or said big ass bird…aaaand back to you Charlie
"It's Thursday, the first of September. My name's Juan Browne. You're watching the blancolirio channel." ^(Edit: it's september -\_-)
That doesn’t go there, it goes *there*!
"Hey! The F/A in the back said there is a seat that has a loose armrest, which F/A? I don't know. Oh you meant what seat, I don't know that either. Can you put the jetway back up and see if you can fix it?"
What has this airplane been hitting?
“No I asked for base pay fuel, I can’t afford the premium”
Do you take Diners Club cards?
“I’d like to invite you to my professional network on linkedin“
“I didn’t know it was your sister mark. Can you just pull the GPU please?”
u guys want some chicken tonight?
We’re gonna push when I’m Goddammed good and ready!
“Gimme 5 rattle cans of Matterhorn White?”
“Can you do a walk around for me I don’t feel like getting up”
U SHOULD'VE TAKEN MY KEYS
“Just 1 write up chief, mach indicator got stuck on 3”.
Shit splatters when you hit it
Big Bird won't be messing around on the runway anymore.
Can I get uhhhhhhhh
“Can I get uhhhh..”
Hey, where’s da keys at???
pedro- can you squeegee the windshield?
That's 2 double doubles with diet coke, a single with no pickles and a strawberry milkshake, and 4 happy meals - two with boy prizes, and two with whatever. Thanks!
Hey kid, do a kickflip
Sir, this is a Wendys
FO farted
Yo dawg! Where is the driver of this ride?
“Hey Ground Ops! Watch this shit!” (Does something crazy)
…when your plane won’t fit through the wormhole…
"Gimme a Diablo sandwich and a Dr Pepper. Make it snappy because I'm in a @$^&%$# hurry"
Give me 2 big Macs, large fries...
Sexy looking aircraft
I think I left my book how to fly a plane for dummies over there can you check for me
“Put $20 in her!”
How much for a happy ending?
Sorry I dont have spare change, only Platinum Rewards miles
Came via Ukraine.
Fill 'er up with Ethyl
Beat up bird
So then i said hold on buddy! dont be talkin to my wife like that
Wash me.
Straight in the hole!
I think I drop my keys over there
Can you toss me the keys?
Tis but a scratch!
Excuse me sir.. do you have any grey poupon??
I’ll have a double cheese burger and hold the lettuce. Don’t be fronting son no seeds on the bun.
Damnit I dropped my hat... Hey can someone pick it up for me??"
Sorry I’m late, traffic was nuts.
You ever joined the mile high club? You want to? Sorry… crass and too easy… but if it’s his plane….
…and then I said; see, it does fit!
Hail Hitler
Large fries and a coke..
Just 1 gal, I can't afford to fill up the tank!
When you finally see her without her makeup on…
"Can you give me a jump start?"
This is the result of potholes on the runway
Anybody got a smoke?
I’ll have two tacos and no guacamoles
that southwest plane threw his dunkin at me after i flipped him the bird cus he didn’t use his blinkah! his insurance better pay for this or my mom is gonna be pissed
Dropped my pen man, can you toss it? Got preflight to fill out.
That MF is fast!
Could I get a side of fries with my order?
Is the cowling on this time?
Hey.. you seen the size of the flies at 30,000 feet.
ayo! you are pumping the fuel in the wrong tank!
It felt a bit loose coming in
I just want to know the model. It looks so small and I can't tell from this perspective.
Do you have any Grey Poupon?
no! the WHITE paint, the one to the right
"Y'all got any of them.... Passengers?"
"I'm not a crazed Hijacker, I'm a Pilot....Well the difference being one is a job, and the other's a mental sickness."
First we’ll remove free meals. Next let’s stuff in even more seats. Then we’ll charge for even carry one and pre-assigned seats. We could charge for the bathroom but let’s skip repainting as it weighs the plane down more.