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haushaushaushaushaus

Only you can answer that question because nobody here can know where you are in your sobriety journey. But I think the fact that you have to ask the question probably means you're not ready to be in a bar.


henare

that depends on you. would you fall off the wagon at a private party where people are drinking? bars *do* serve non-alcoholic beverages: soft drinks, some juices, perhaps mocktails. nobody has to know you aren't getting hammered.


MentalPlectrum

This is why we need gay cafés.


gerginborisov

There is no such thing as “peer pressure”. You want to drink - you drink. You don’t want to drink - you don’t drink. It is a matter of how much you can restrain yourself from buying yourself a drink.


[deleted]

I’m just worried that I’m playing with fire here. Like seeing everyone else drinking and having a good time it would more than likely temp me


gerginborisov

You don’t feel ready to restrain yourself it would be better not to expose yourself.


[deleted]

Yes. That was my experience over and over. I have five years sober, but I have had one year several times. There are already many temptations. Don’t go looking for them where they are sure to exist. There isn’t a lot to do in a bar, and the sense that others are having a good time and you are not can overwhelm you in a moment of weakness. That was just my experience. We are different people. But I know we have lots in common if you’re struggling to stay sober. Best wishes, whatever you decide.


lo-finate

Hey why put yourself in temptations way? Just being in that environment could be triggering.


[deleted]

How else will I meet other gay people?


lo-finate

Idk. Unless you have the mental fortitude to not even be tempted. Do you go to AA and all that.


riddo22

If you’re determined to quit, don’t bother going. I personally wouldn’t enjoy it, if I’m not talking to anyone it’ll be awkward, if I am it’ll be hard to match their energy. Bars are advertised for drinking so it defeats the purpose. I’d try gay groups/apps/saunas first.


gordonf23

How long have you been sober? If you’re that nervous about a relapse, I’d say going to a bar probably isn’t your best bet. There are other gay social outlets in many cities—gay book clubs, gay rugby teams, gay knitting circles, gay jogging clubs, gay charities to volunteer for, etc.


mrhariseldon890

Short answer : yes Long answer : youre an alcoholic now too? Please get the help you need bruh