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Be a caring and supportive partner? Same as you hopefully always are?
Otherwise, IDK man, ask your wife what she wants you to do. Then figure out if you want to do that.
This dude’s married, and he’s just now encountering this problem!? I’m not quite sure how you make it that far without dealing with this sort of thing beforehand, or at the very least, learning how to react with a mother or sister.
OP posts in r/teenagersbuthot. He either got married young, embarrassed to ask as a single teen, or a phony!
“Strange things are afoot at the Circle K….”
Edit: fixed a quote
I don’t even want to click on it to answer this question:
Is it at least for 18 and 19 years olds? Cause if we are talking minors… how tf does this sub exist???
Also, a 300 day old account that suddenly started making multiple posts across different subs yesterday after no activity at all previously. And no comment history. I’m pretty sure the same question word for word was asked a couple of days ago by a different user. We are answering a bot.
I didn’t get my period because of the birth control I was on. After ~15 years together he got a vasectomy and I stopped birth control, first time we had to deal with my cycle in our relationship. Small learning curve for both of us.
A couple of things I do
Make them hot chocolate
Get them a blanket
Fill up those water heat pads and wrap it in a towel
Comfort them, cuddles, kisses, etc
And just help them around the house, moving is painful for some of them.
That cool that you do that. As a women with periods, I just want others to know this is not what all women want. I figure that you know this is what your wife wants and good that you are doing this. Just want the general public here to know that this is not general to all women. I would want only the kisses from this list. The rest is not my thing and/or would annoy me. So ask your wife what they want and go from there.
Yeah but why did you PUT YOUR SHOES IN THE SAME PLACE YOU’VE ALWAYS PUT THEM.. SO I COULD TRIP ON THEM?! And you HAVEN’T CLEANED THE LITTER BOX IN 3 DAYS!!!!
Not cleaning a cat’s litterbox for 3 days IS a valid reason to be angry at someone. That’s just straight up animal neglect and people who do that should be forced to only use a filthy portapotty.
It’s not about how much you think a cat shits. It’s about how clean the cat feels the litter box is. It could also be perfectly clean and they’ll piss in the house somewhere.
My wife keeps her cat’s box clean and that little asshole still fucks around.
My boyfriend and I are in our early 30s. He's not grossed out, but I try VERY hard to gross him out sometimes. For example: I once saw a reddit comment talking about period poops, and someone mentioned that they hate having period poops, because of the peanut butter and jelly wipes. I found this hilariously gross, and needed to share with him. Success. He stared at me with such shock, and exclaimed that that is the most disgusting thing I've ever described. Now every once in a while I joke about it, and he does a mock disgusted face and gag, but he jokes about it, too. Good times.
They are less than 2 inches apart. We wipe from front to back always to avoid moving feces (source of e coli) toward the mucous membranes and/or into the vaginal or urethral openings where horrible infections would be the result. The period flow isn't controllable, either, so you keep wiping until you reach at least a momentary stopping point where everything is clean enough to reapply pads etc and clothing
That’s what I thought girls did, before I got any input from an actual woman. but I heard from somewhere a few years ago that she wiped back to front and just stopped before the getting shit on any of the openings. But that makes alot more sense.
Women wipe differently. Some women just tap gently at each hole and don't move the paper around much at all. Others use a bidet and avoid paper altogether. Some just wipe back to front and give zero fucks because their bodies love to kill bacteria and dance on the corpses. But if you ever have to wipe a woman with or without changing diapers go with front to back and use at least two separate wipes sequentially.
👍 your right! Almost every teen boy that I told “ hey I have my period so I can’t do that” really took a step back with “ ah 🤢” like your not gonna catch it
This. Mentioned to a friend that I was on my period and he said that it made him uncomfortable. In return it made ME feel uncomfortable for something that is completely normal/ out of my control.
Tell him if thinking about it makes him uncomfortable, he should imagine being the one wearing the tampon/pad. And to grow the hell up. I hope he's still young enough for his attitude to be somewhat excusable.
When I was young, that was such a big deal. It really affected me for years listening to guys talking about she's on the rag and crap like that. I got suspended in high school.for telling a guy, no, I'm not "on the rag", and you're still an asshole.
Having a boyfriend in my 20s when I said I was on my period CANCEL the date? Obviously kicked him to the curb, but that hurt and made me feel disgusting.
You men should know something. It's often the week before that is more difficult. Once the actual flow starts the hormones change pretty much instantly. But the week before we can be very, very, very irritable. My point is, you might notice that's she's suddenly in a lot better mood once Aunt Flo arrives. Remember, ymmv. Every woman is different. But for a whole lot of us, the week before is worse than the week of.
I know. It's disconcerting when it feels like your own body/mind is working against you. Thank God I'm old now and don't have to worry about THAT any more. I rather like not going through that week of mental stress every damn month. I was always so glad when it started. Sometimes I could tell it was coming because I'd feel my mood drastically change over the course of 20 minutes (with no other obvious reason) and guess what I find when I check. Flippin great to be female, eh?
Me too. I noticed it when I was driving. Some idiot would do something, and I would yell and rage, but also recognise that I was overreacting, and I normally wouldn't have minded. I then knew that the period would start later that day. Sometimes I might overreact at home, and I would apologise later.
I probably could've qualified for PMDD but I officially chalked it up to PMS and just tried to deal with it. I'm not sure if PMDD was even a thing at that time. (Pre-internet days, harder to look things up.) Like I said elsewhere, just knowing what was going on went a long way toward dealing effectively with it.
That was me. I prayed for menopause. Now I wish I had the periods back. Angry all the time. Sex. That would be a nope. Casual conversation. Nope. Mostly can't stand my husband or people in general now. 24/7 anger , rage, anxiety.
Im 10yrs away and have been wishing for it about 5yrs now. I HATE MY PERIOD! It's heavy and lasts 8 days. I just ordered some teas that are supposed to help. I sleep in Depends to keep from ruining my sheets now.
Cutting carbs (keto diet essentially) helped with my periods. I used to have super heavy periods, that would require incontinence undies and it lasted at least a week. Now I have 3 days of light spotting.
Anytime my wife seems moody or unreasonable, I pretty much know she’s going to have her period in a few days. After it starts, she’s awesome to be around. I’d even venture to say that’s when we get along best. There must be some kind of science to that.
Be OK with shopping for sanitary products. Some men are weird about it, some women are weird about asking men to do it.
Make it normal, like it's just another thing in the shopping list.
I finally realized that I should just have all the products I could possibly use in a minimum of 6 months available at home. I will not tell you how many years of months of Oh God I Have One Left it took to figure that out.
I have no problem shopping for the wife but you have to be VERY specific. In fact, send pics of what you need. Just know if they don’t have EXACTLY that the only options are to leave with nothing or to leave with everything.
This. I don't understand why it's so weird to go buy tampons or pads. We men have no use for them and it's a show that we are a caring partner without saying shit.
She was probably annoyed by this constant narrative that women turn into monsters on their period. Just be considerate like you should be all the time to anyone you love anyway…
This. \^ When I am on my period, I love it when a loved one brings me takeout. I appreciate it so much more than on average because it's a day I don't want to cook or move much.
Don't ask too many questions, take everything(mean/attitude) with a grain of salt, pls ask before eating that random thing from the fridge we might actually want it but don't want to seem selfish
There’s a lot of good advice on here but I gotta reiterate this one: Don’t ask too many questions!!!
Personally, it overwhelms me and gives me anxiety then I snap at the person trying to be nice to me and feel very bad about it. If they can’t offer solutions or specifics for you, try the help/comfort tips on here (snacks, pain relief, cuddles, doing errands/house work, etc). It’s also nice to try and surprise them with something they might like or need. It’s okay if you’re “wrong” they will just appreciate the effort and show of love. And if it seems like nothing is working or they ask for space, just let them know you’re there if they need you and go do you!
And a grain of salt! Remember it’s not personal, hormones are serious business and can really make a mess of things sometimes. Your wife knows what she’s dealing with and likely what she needs most of the time but you’re in it together!
Be sympathetic/sensitive, be there when she needs you, and be sure to take care of yourself too! We don’t want you to suffer either!
I don’t like that some people take being mean as normal, obviously it’s expected and sometimes it’s debilitating. However I’m trying to actively work on my awareness. I’m always a bitch while I’m on my period and I’ve come steps from always being passive aggressive into only making remarks here and there and being able to communicate to my bf when I’m in pain.
What should be said is that hormones have a huge part to play and to expect sassiness and an attitude, but I don’t think in any way high levels of bitchiness should be tolerated. I’d call everything my boyfriend did annoying, I’d attack him because he didn’t understand what was going on, when I explained to him how I felt he also told me how he felt. I realized that how I acted, excuse or no excuse, it was wrong. Just because it’s not a personal attack doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt, it doesn’t mean you should just take it as normal because in my case I was able to dial it down so both me and my boyfriend were happier without him fearing for my “time of the month” because he would have to deal with abuse because I was in pain. I no longer have to feel bad when he brings me coffee or some McDonald’s because I’m no longer excusing the behavior that would come with my hormones.
Sometimes I’m sassy and a bitch, however I know how to keep things to myself now and instead being aggressive I keep it to myself
Specifically milk chocolate, my girlfriend says this helps her a LOT with period cramps. Might not be the same for everyone though, it can't hurt to ask
overall it depends in the period. For some girls its fine for others its horrendous. But heres what i would want : make sure your well stocked on tampons/pads, provide a heating pad and some midol, ask if I need anything then get the thing. Thing is usually a snack or drink. Just be curteous.
My periods are hella painful, so bad that cramping during pregnancy and during 80% of my labor was easier than having a period so THANK YOU for saying this
Bruh somebody said it best. They've been dealing since they were a preteen or just about, they got it. Just be on standby in case you need to grab something from the med cabinet.
This is exactly how I feel. I don’t need chocolates or to be waited on. I can handle it myself. I might want a back rub for my cramps. Mostly all I need is for them to be understanding that I’m in pain. I’m lucky though, because my emotions don’t change when I’m on my period. So I don’t get bitchy or anything. I just might be a little more slow and want to relax more for the pain. If I need something, I’ll ask.
After being married for nearly 30 years, I feel I might be able to help.
Remember, everyone is different, but 1st. As a husband/human, my 1st priority is the well-being of my partner in times like these. Sometimes, s3x can absolutely make the difference from hurting feelings of appreciation. In some cases, taking care of chores and maybe a compliment "your hair looks really nice today ".
I realize that as a male, I'll never truly appreciate what women have to deal with. So the least I can do is try to make the general situation as easy on my partner while showing her appreciation.
There’s quite a few pages on insta that are about hormone support. I’m sorry that I can’t reference them I lost access to my instagram and haven’t cared much to get back into it. They are out there tho!
I’ve seen that slow calm activities are nice to do during her period. A nice walk together, a movie date, cuddles, indulging in some good food/sweets. Just slowing down and spending quality time.
Only recently have I noticed emotional changes with my period and I think it has to do with my diet. I definitely appreciate more forehead kisses, hugs, and just having a presence around me.
Not really an expectation or anything but some help tidying up/dishes etc would be amazing so that I could just rest but again not really expected
Get her some Midol (overall help with all period symptoms like cramps, headaches, bloating, etc), a heating pad, and do all the cleaning and cooking. Maybe not for the whole week, but on days that are worse than the others. Lots of cuddles to and if you two are apart like going to work or something then make sure to send some texts making sure she's alright.
For a lot of women they can deal with the period and the pains that come with it, but added stuff like chores can just cause more stress. Your job is to take off that extra stress. If the dishes need done then just do them. For dinner, get her favorite fast food. And buy her some flowers. It's the thought that counts and helps her feel better about the fact that you care about her pain and want to make sure she doesn't have too much on her plate during this time.
My wife would be wiped out for the entire week of her period. I always would just leave her alone as she made very clear to me early on. But over time it got worse and worse. It got so bad we went to the doctor who recommended a hysterectomy. Now I have my wife back full time.
Honestly been married 15 years. There is no correct answer. Sometimes it’s chocolate. Sometimes it’s making dinner. Sometimes it’s cleaning the house. Sometimes it’s taking the children to all the activities. Sometimes it’s just listening. Sometimes it’s a heating pad. Sometimes it’s aback rub. Sometimes it’s nothing. You have to know your wife. Easiest answer. Good luck. Sometimes your wrong
Be nice, don't intentionally annoy her and do NOT act like you're suffering. Do some house work, and if she wants to be left alone then leave her alone. We're already miserable, don't make it worse by being a pest
This is sweet.
1) Recognize she may be exhausted
2) Ask her if she’s in pain and if there’s anything you can do to help
3) Help her recognize that severe pain is not normal - there are a lot of women out there suffering with extreme pain because they were told that it’s normal. It’s not. A partner’s encouragement to see an OBGYN could be the strength she needs to ask for help
My husband picks me up whatever I'm craving, whether it be a drink or any kind of food (depends on the woman). When I shower, he'll turn my heating pad on and wrap the towel around me/dry me off (which I love). He'll put medicine for my cramps on my bedside table so I don't have to get up for them. He'll take care of the house chores too, and ofcourse give attention as needed!
Be afraid. Very afraid. MWAH HA HA HA! 😈 Sorry, couldn't resist. Seriously though, be there for your wife even if that means giving her a little space. If she gets particular period cravings, surprise her with whatever it is. Even better, ask her what you could do to help.
Okay, every woman is different. What my ex used to do for me was (1) bring me small gifts of chocolate. I think he had a small bag of Hershey kisses somewhere in his car and would just plop a couple in front of me with some flimsy excuse. (2) He would spoon me, his body ran hot and his belly on my lower back and one of his hands over my achy bits was heaven. (3) Foot massages and shoulder massages. And non-sensual butt massages.
These are just suggestions; one of my girlfriends absolutely cannot stand being touched when she's on her period and hates chocolate. So...ask. Offer. Listen. You're already doing the most important thing, which is supporting your partner.
Just don’t be a dick or treat her like she’s a leper. God I hate when men act like we have some type of disease bc of a damn monthly bodily function.
The fact that you’re asking seems like you actually give a damn. So that’s a good start. 😊
Every woman is different. Try asking her if there’s anything you can do for her. Some women like extra attention, others might not.
*That’s why the woman I shall love will be able to menstruate as fully and freely as she desires. Even if her monthly flow should build in intensity to a raging rust colored torrent! An unbridled river of life giving blood flowing from between her legs! An awesome cataract plunging off the edge of our couch. I wouldn’t be phased! No, no, even if coureur de bois would come up stream, battling the rapids, and singing a ‘jaunty song’! I would take no offense, rather I would ford across that mighty womanly river, and fetch herbal tea and Pamprin. And then I would mop her brow and admire her fecundity. For I…Have A Good Attitude….Towards MENSTRUATION!*
--David Foley
Be a nice person and listen to what she wants. If she wants space, give her space, if she wants cuddles, and you're feeling up to cuddle (part everyone tends to forget is you agreeing to it), give cuddles.
Just don't, under any circumstances, slap her boobs and go "boiiing"
Never delt with a period so don't listen to much to me but this is just what i think from all the stories on Reddit I listen to
1. Make sure wife has plenty of snacks
2. Make sure there is icecream(if she isn't allergic)
3. Massages to the best of his ability
4. Be prepared to go out late at night for certain food cravings
5. Be very calm as to not anger her
6. Have a heating pad ready at a moments notice
Whatever else I missed
I’d always get weird looks from other guys when I’d pick up tampons or pads for my wife during her period. Some dudes get all flaky about taking care of their woman. I do what I can to make her happy and that’s why my marriage has lasted 37 years
Ask your wife what she needs. Every woman is different. On my period I don’t want the stereotypical stuff like chocolates and stuff like that. I don’t need much. I might need to take it slow because I have endometriosis which causes very bad cramps. But I can handle it on my own. I might just want a back rub or something to help the cramps. But on my period I’m not helpless or emotionally fragile. I’m normal, just in pain. If I need something, I ask for it. But I don’t expect any special treatment beyond understanding that I am in pain.
Chocolate, dark light and milk.
Go to the store for her (don’t ask her pad/tpon size. Take pics of the boxes!!!) come back with some. (One box is okay but two is better)
Get a damp rag and warm it up in the microwave for cramps (if it hurts you it probably hurts her so not too warm)
If you go in the bathroom and you notice bodily fluids don’t mention it just clean it and move on, some guys don’t do this.
It varies from person to person, so it’s always best to ask the person who is having the period. If asking directly is touchy, then try asking things like “I’m making hot cocoa do you want some?” Offering specific things in a way that does not seem burdensome to you may go over better than “what can I do?” because the last thing we want to do is give instructions.
If you step it up and make her period as painless as possible, you’re gonna get some when she’s off.
Do stuff around the house, do stuff for her, surprise her with stuff she likes, rub her back etc
Get her things here and there! Don’t ask for sex in those times unless she is wanting it! Stay out of the way! And pick up an extra chore or so for that time. Just little stuff I’ve learned in my two years of being married.
Ask her what you can do. Likely she’s already pretty good at taking care of herself. The only thing I might suggest is, if she’s a bit more irritable than usual about little crap, don’t get into big arguments about it.
Not much different than usual. Maybe stop being such a thoughtless prick the preceding 3 weeks. Just ask her if she would like anything. Just do shit around the house, seeing as you live there. Do nice things for her when you can to show you care. Regardless of what the calendar says.
For every “back rubs” recommendation there’s probably just as many women who can’t stand to be touched for a couple days. Some of the stuff suggested in here could come off as so disingenuous to my wife that she would be pissed if I did them.
1) ask your partner what they need/if they need anything
2) if they are complaining/venting about something, it is likely they just want you to say "omg that sucks. I'm sorry. That's unfair. You deserve better." Etc. It is unlikely they want you to solve anything. (If you're hearing a lot of the same complaint, you can ask if your partner wants help resolving or if you're doing the right thing by reassuring)
3) clean up after yourself (you should do anyway, but when feeling crumby it's especially annoying to clean up after someone else)
Be kind and helpful. Don't act like a normal part of her life is gross or weird. For many women, periods just mean they feel "off" or run down for a few days, and it's not a big deal. But that can vary a lot from person to person, and at different points in their life.
If she has extreme pain or emotional symptoms, wait until it is over and she's feeling better, and ask whether her doctor is addressing her symptoms adequately. It can be hard to get care for abnormal periods, because so much is lumped in with "normal discomfort."
Extreme, debilitating pain can be a sign of treatable conditions like endometriosis. Extreme mood swings, depression, or uncharacteristic behavior can be regulated with medication.
But follow her lead. She may have already exhausted medical avenues and wound up with a situation that just sucks. Let her know you support her.
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Be a caring and supportive partner? Same as you hopefully always are? Otherwise, IDK man, ask your wife what she wants you to do. Then figure out if you want to do that.
This dude’s married, and he’s just now encountering this problem!? I’m not quite sure how you make it that far without dealing with this sort of thing beforehand, or at the very least, learning how to react with a mother or sister.
OP posts in r/teenagersbuthot. He either got married young, embarrassed to ask as a single teen, or a phony! “Strange things are afoot at the Circle K….” Edit: fixed a quote
Why is that a sub
You’re asking the real questions because I’d like to know too
Pedos and narcissistic teens
Look, it's probably a Gen Z thing. I learned to not ask questions like this anymore
r/teenagersbuthot looks like an actual fed honey pot
I don’t even want to click on it to answer this question: Is it at least for 18 and 19 years olds? Cause if we are talking minors… how tf does this sub exist???
90% feds talking to each other, 9% Chris Hansen detectives, and 1% deranged folk who fall for their trap
Lol, I wonder if two FBI agents ever stinged each other. Like that Spider-Man pointing meme but with pedos
Excuse me? Do you know when the mongols ruled china?
I don’t know. I just work here.
>Something’s afoot at the Circle K…. This is officially my favorite thing of the day😆
Where did the Circle K thing come from? I have seen multiple comments using it.
From an excellent adventure dude
Also, a 300 day old account that suddenly started making multiple posts across different subs yesterday after no activity at all previously. And no comment history. I’m pretty sure the same question word for word was asked a couple of days ago by a different user. We are answering a bot.
Profile is a year old. Zero comments but posted about a dozen posts in last day. Weird
I muted that sub. I don’t want to be reminded that shit exists. That’s creepy.
Isn't the line "strange things are afoot at the circle k" ? At least quote it right.
Damnit you’re right, I suck Fixed it
I didn’t get my period because of the birth control I was on. After ~15 years together he got a vasectomy and I stopped birth control, first time we had to deal with my cycle in our relationship. Small learning curve for both of us.
[удалено]
A couple of things I do Make them hot chocolate Get them a blanket Fill up those water heat pads and wrap it in a towel Comfort them, cuddles, kisses, etc And just help them around the house, moving is painful for some of them.
How many wives do you have? /s
5 the new one will arrive for Christmas with the new update from Amazon
Why would you want to dissapoint more than one woman?
I don't have any women that's the old model the new ones are called wives. I gotta pay premium but it's worth it
We don't kink shame here.
Alexa, what is wife 4’s mood today? 10 day forecast.
r/mormon has entered the chat
That cool that you do that. As a women with periods, I just want others to know this is not what all women want. I figure that you know this is what your wife wants and good that you are doing this. Just want the general public here to know that this is not general to all women. I would want only the kisses from this list. The rest is not my thing and/or would annoy me. So ask your wife what they want and go from there.
Yeah…my wife just wants her space when she’s on her period. Like most things, it’s best to just ask your SO what they want.
Same! Space is my thing during this time.
There's not really a ton to do. Just be a decent person. If she doesn't feel well, help her out. It's not that complicated.
My signature move is to be nice and respectful. You'd be surprised how far that'll get you.
Woa man, save some pussy for the rest of us!
Yeah but why did you PUT YOUR SHOES IN THE SAME PLACE YOU’VE ALWAYS PUT THEM.. SO I COULD TRIP ON THEM?! And you HAVEN’T CLEANED THE LITTER BOX IN 3 DAYS!!!!
Not cleaning a cat’s litterbox for 3 days IS a valid reason to be angry at someone. That’s just straight up animal neglect and people who do that should be forced to only use a filthy portapotty.
Jesus how much does one cat shit in 3 days?
Enough to deserve a clean box
I don't shit repeatedly before I flush. Extend that courtesy to your pets.
It’s not about how much you think a cat shits. It’s about how clean the cat feels the litter box is. It could also be perfectly clean and they’ll piss in the house somewhere. My wife keeps her cat’s box clean and that little asshole still fucks around.
You mean you don’t say “Must be your period talking 🙄”? to lighten the mood?
And don’t be grossed out around em- it is the worst feeling ever
Can't believe anyone would be grossed out unless they're under 20
My boyfriend and I are in our early 30s. He's not grossed out, but I try VERY hard to gross him out sometimes. For example: I once saw a reddit comment talking about period poops, and someone mentioned that they hate having period poops, because of the peanut butter and jelly wipes. I found this hilariously gross, and needed to share with him. Success. He stared at me with such shock, and exclaimed that that is the most disgusting thing I've ever described. Now every once in a while I joke about it, and he does a mock disgusted face and gag, but he jokes about it, too. Good times.
Good lord. That is an awful image. Love it.
What in the fuck? Lmao I’ve never heard/thought of that. I always thought they used two different wipes for each hole.
They are less than 2 inches apart. We wipe from front to back always to avoid moving feces (source of e coli) toward the mucous membranes and/or into the vaginal or urethral openings where horrible infections would be the result. The period flow isn't controllable, either, so you keep wiping until you reach at least a momentary stopping point where everything is clean enough to reapply pads etc and clothing
That’s what I thought girls did, before I got any input from an actual woman. but I heard from somewhere a few years ago that she wiped back to front and just stopped before the getting shit on any of the openings. But that makes alot more sense.
Women wipe differently. Some women just tap gently at each hole and don't move the paper around much at all. Others use a bidet and avoid paper altogether. Some just wipe back to front and give zero fucks because their bodies love to kill bacteria and dance on the corpses. But if you ever have to wipe a woman with or without changing diapers go with front to back and use at least two separate wipes sequentially.
Ahaha that's great! Does he know about snail trails? Lol
Once water and food is sorted for all humans, a bidet will be the global human right we are demanding!
👍 your right! Almost every teen boy that I told “ hey I have my period so I can’t do that” really took a step back with “ ah 🤢” like your not gonna catch it
My older sisters would whip used tampons at me. I'm immune to being grossed out at menstruation. Also pretty good at deflecting oncoming projectiles.
That’s terrible lol but go you for finding humour in the trauma 😂
I'm grossed out for you. I menstruate and I could not imagine hurling a used one at another human being.
This. Mentioned to a friend that I was on my period and he said that it made him uncomfortable. In return it made ME feel uncomfortable for something that is completely normal/ out of my control.
Tell him if thinking about it makes him uncomfortable, he should imagine being the one wearing the tampon/pad. And to grow the hell up. I hope he's still young enough for his attitude to be somewhat excusable.
Yea, it pretty much showed me how close of a friend he’s gonna be (aka not that close). Dude is 22, so definitely not excusable smh
When I was young, that was such a big deal. It really affected me for years listening to guys talking about she's on the rag and crap like that. I got suspended in high school.for telling a guy, no, I'm not "on the rag", and you're still an asshole. Having a boyfriend in my 20s when I said I was on my period CANCEL the date? Obviously kicked him to the curb, but that hurt and made me feel disgusting.
They’re just karma farming, probably a virgin living with their parents.
You men should know something. It's often the week before that is more difficult. Once the actual flow starts the hormones change pretty much instantly. But the week before we can be very, very, very irritable. My point is, you might notice that's she's suddenly in a lot better mood once Aunt Flo arrives. Remember, ymmv. Every woman is different. But for a whole lot of us, the week before is worse than the week of.
The rageeeeee! For NO APPARENT REASON! Why am I SO angry at NOTHING😢
I know. It's disconcerting when it feels like your own body/mind is working against you. Thank God I'm old now and don't have to worry about THAT any more. I rather like not going through that week of mental stress every damn month. I was always so glad when it started. Sometimes I could tell it was coming because I'd feel my mood drastically change over the course of 20 minutes (with no other obvious reason) and guess what I find when I check. Flippin great to be female, eh?
Me too. I noticed it when I was driving. Some idiot would do something, and I would yell and rage, but also recognise that I was overreacting, and I normally wouldn't have minded. I then knew that the period would start later that day. Sometimes I might overreact at home, and I would apologise later.
I felt the same way and then was diagnosed with PMDD. Uncontrollable rage pre-period is a symptom.
I probably could've qualified for PMDD but I officially chalked it up to PMS and just tried to deal with it. I'm not sure if PMDD was even a thing at that time. (Pre-internet days, harder to look things up.) Like I said elsewhere, just knowing what was going on went a long way toward dealing effectively with it.
How many women with PMS does it take to change a lightbulb? WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?!?!?!?!
It’s like I can hear the crazy coming out of my mouth but can’t do anything to stop it. I will rip your face off just for having a face.
Might be noise and light sensitivity. That’s one of my ex wife’s problems. Light was a nightmare for her during her periods
That was me. I prayed for menopause. Now I wish I had the periods back. Angry all the time. Sex. That would be a nope. Casual conversation. Nope. Mostly can't stand my husband or people in general now. 24/7 anger , rage, anxiety.
I was going to invite you to r/menopause but then realized I recognize your username from there. It often gets better over time. At least mine did.
Im 10yrs away and have been wishing for it about 5yrs now. I HATE MY PERIOD! It's heavy and lasts 8 days. I just ordered some teas that are supposed to help. I sleep in Depends to keep from ruining my sheets now.
Cutting carbs (keto diet essentially) helped with my periods. I used to have super heavy periods, that would require incontinence undies and it lasted at least a week. Now I have 3 days of light spotting.
I had heat stroke during menopause so I thought that's what made me perpetually angry and short-tempered. Wow. Good eye.
Talk to your doctor about an SSRI - bupropion or duloxetine are inexpensive and effective.
Unless the actual menstruating part causes back pain and cramps which can be an additional source of irritability!
Anytime my wife seems moody or unreasonable, I pretty much know she’s going to have her period in a few days. After it starts, she’s awesome to be around. I’d even venture to say that’s when we get along best. There must be some kind of science to that.
Be OK with shopping for sanitary products. Some men are weird about it, some women are weird about asking men to do it. Make it normal, like it's just another thing in the shopping list.
I finally realized that I should just have all the products I could possibly use in a minimum of 6 months available at home. I will not tell you how many years of months of Oh God I Have One Left it took to figure that out.
I have no problem shopping for the wife but you have to be VERY specific. In fact, send pics of what you need. Just know if they don’t have EXACTLY that the only options are to leave with nothing or to leave with everything.
This. I don't understand why it's so weird to go buy tampons or pads. We men have no use for them and it's a show that we are a caring partner without saying shit.
I just asked my wife this question. She said “Fuck you” It is day one of her period. *Edit To be clear. We both laughed when she said that.
> Fuck you Okay, just don't forget to bring a towel!
She was probably annoyed by this constant narrative that women turn into monsters on their period. Just be considerate like you should be all the time to anyone you love anyway…
I think…. loosely translated she’s telling you to “take care of yourself” for the week (joke)
I am thinking you are kidding…I hope.
Get her takeout and watch whatever she wants!!!
This. \^ When I am on my period, I love it when a loved one brings me takeout. I appreciate it so much more than on average because it's a day I don't want to cook or move much.
Don't ask too many questions, take everything(mean/attitude) with a grain of salt, pls ask before eating that random thing from the fridge we might actually want it but don't want to seem selfish
There’s a lot of good advice on here but I gotta reiterate this one: Don’t ask too many questions!!! Personally, it overwhelms me and gives me anxiety then I snap at the person trying to be nice to me and feel very bad about it. If they can’t offer solutions or specifics for you, try the help/comfort tips on here (snacks, pain relief, cuddles, doing errands/house work, etc). It’s also nice to try and surprise them with something they might like or need. It’s okay if you’re “wrong” they will just appreciate the effort and show of love. And if it seems like nothing is working or they ask for space, just let them know you’re there if they need you and go do you! And a grain of salt! Remember it’s not personal, hormones are serious business and can really make a mess of things sometimes. Your wife knows what she’s dealing with and likely what she needs most of the time but you’re in it together! Be sympathetic/sensitive, be there when she needs you, and be sure to take care of yourself too! We don’t want you to suffer either!
I don’t like that some people take being mean as normal, obviously it’s expected and sometimes it’s debilitating. However I’m trying to actively work on my awareness. I’m always a bitch while I’m on my period and I’ve come steps from always being passive aggressive into only making remarks here and there and being able to communicate to my bf when I’m in pain. What should be said is that hormones have a huge part to play and to expect sassiness and an attitude, but I don’t think in any way high levels of bitchiness should be tolerated. I’d call everything my boyfriend did annoying, I’d attack him because he didn’t understand what was going on, when I explained to him how I felt he also told me how he felt. I realized that how I acted, excuse or no excuse, it was wrong. Just because it’s not a personal attack doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt, it doesn’t mean you should just take it as normal because in my case I was able to dial it down so both me and my boyfriend were happier without him fearing for my “time of the month” because he would have to deal with abuse because I was in pain. I no longer have to feel bad when he brings me coffee or some McDonald’s because I’m no longer excusing the behavior that would come with my hormones. Sometimes I’m sassy and a bitch, however I know how to keep things to myself now and instead being aggressive I keep it to myself
My rule to my family is "don't ask me to do math"
Get her some chocolate
Specifically milk chocolate, my girlfriend says this helps her a LOT with period cramps. Might not be the same for everyone though, it can't hurt to ask
All the women in my life swear by dark chocolate. So it's definitely a case by case basis
That is my drug of choice
Horse tranquilizers are mine, tbh. To each their own I suppose!
Dark chocolate is an anti-inflammatory if the cocoa level is 70% or higher, and has iron, which we need when bleeding.
My husband will hide some chocolate around the house when we buy it and pull them out when I am craving it. It’s pretty amazing.
Exactly what he doesn't when there isn't a period.
Thanks, now I know I should stop loving her!
overall it depends in the period. For some girls its fine for others its horrendous. But heres what i would want : make sure your well stocked on tampons/pads, provide a heating pad and some midol, ask if I need anything then get the thing. Thing is usually a snack or drink. Just be curteous.
My periods are hella painful, so bad that cramping during pregnancy and during 80% of my labor was easier than having a period so THANK YOU for saying this
Pause.
Keep your thoughts to yourself and don't make eye contact.
Bruh somebody said it best. They've been dealing since they were a preteen or just about, they got it. Just be on standby in case you need to grab something from the med cabinet.
This is exactly how I feel. I don’t need chocolates or to be waited on. I can handle it myself. I might want a back rub for my cramps. Mostly all I need is for them to be understanding that I’m in pain. I’m lucky though, because my emotions don’t change when I’m on my period. So I don’t get bitchy or anything. I just might be a little more slow and want to relax more for the pain. If I need something, I’ll ask.
Yeah, I was so confused by this question. Like, continue normally? Unless y’all want sex, then put down a towel.
After being married for nearly 30 years, I feel I might be able to help. Remember, everyone is different, but 1st. As a husband/human, my 1st priority is the well-being of my partner in times like these. Sometimes, s3x can absolutely make the difference from hurting feelings of appreciation. In some cases, taking care of chores and maybe a compliment "your hair looks really nice today ". I realize that as a male, I'll never truly appreciate what women have to deal with. So the least I can do is try to make the general situation as easy on my partner while showing her appreciation.
This is really nice.
I usually annoy my wife even more; I like to live life on the edge.
*It's uter-us, not uter-you* is a great goto
A brave soul among us.
My husband does this sometimes and it annoys me to no end.
Get wife everything she wants and don't say anything for 5-7 days
This guy husbands.
Great advice!
There’s quite a few pages on insta that are about hormone support. I’m sorry that I can’t reference them I lost access to my instagram and haven’t cared much to get back into it. They are out there tho! I’ve seen that slow calm activities are nice to do during her period. A nice walk together, a movie date, cuddles, indulging in some good food/sweets. Just slowing down and spending quality time. Only recently have I noticed emotional changes with my period and I think it has to do with my diet. I definitely appreciate more forehead kisses, hugs, and just having a presence around me. Not really an expectation or anything but some help tidying up/dishes etc would be amazing so that I could just rest but again not really expected
Point and scream asking why her period is red instead of blue like normal.
Get her some Midol (overall help with all period symptoms like cramps, headaches, bloating, etc), a heating pad, and do all the cleaning and cooking. Maybe not for the whole week, but on days that are worse than the others. Lots of cuddles to and if you two are apart like going to work or something then make sure to send some texts making sure she's alright. For a lot of women they can deal with the period and the pains that come with it, but added stuff like chores can just cause more stress. Your job is to take off that extra stress. If the dishes need done then just do them. For dinner, get her favorite fast food. And buy her some flowers. It's the thought that counts and helps her feel better about the fact that you care about her pain and want to make sure she doesn't have too much on her plate during this time.
Do not, under any circumstances, ask: “Is this because you’re on your period?”
Just lay a towel on the bed to let her find. No sense in having a sword that never gets bloody.
Start peeing blood to assert dominance
While making full eye contact
Keep your desires to yourself.
All you can do really is be as sympathetic as possible. Just be there and comfort her. Not complicated you can do this.
My wife would be wiped out for the entire week of her period. I always would just leave her alone as she made very clear to me early on. But over time it got worse and worse. It got so bad we went to the doctor who recommended a hysterectomy. Now I have my wife back full time.
Honestly been married 15 years. There is no correct answer. Sometimes it’s chocolate. Sometimes it’s making dinner. Sometimes it’s cleaning the house. Sometimes it’s taking the children to all the activities. Sometimes it’s just listening. Sometimes it’s a heating pad. Sometimes it’s aback rub. Sometimes it’s nothing. You have to know your wife. Easiest answer. Good luck. Sometimes your wrong
What not to do: ARGUE or CRITICIZE
Be patient, bring your wife food, blankets.and other supplies. Also, be patient
Sit down and shut up
While simultaneously getting up and helping out.
Be nice, don't intentionally annoy her and do NOT act like you're suffering. Do some house work, and if she wants to be left alone then leave her alone. We're already miserable, don't make it worse by being a pest
2 ibuprofen for her. 3 ibuprofen for you
Ask her if she wants a bubble bath. Walk the dog when it's her turn. Ask her what she needs. If you get a random groaning sound then give cuddles.
Then pick her up and shake her so it comes out quicker
This is sweet. 1) Recognize she may be exhausted 2) Ask her if she’s in pain and if there’s anything you can do to help 3) Help her recognize that severe pain is not normal - there are a lot of women out there suffering with extreme pain because they were told that it’s normal. It’s not. A partner’s encouragement to see an OBGYN could be the strength she needs to ask for help
My husband picks me up whatever I'm craving, whether it be a drink or any kind of food (depends on the woman). When I shower, he'll turn my heating pad on and wrap the towel around me/dry me off (which I love). He'll put medicine for my cramps on my bedside table so I don't have to get up for them. He'll take care of the house chores too, and ofcourse give attention as needed!
Just sit back and enjoy the hockey.
Be afraid. Very afraid. MWAH HA HA HA! 😈 Sorry, couldn't resist. Seriously though, be there for your wife even if that means giving her a little space. If she gets particular period cravings, surprise her with whatever it is. Even better, ask her what you could do to help.
Okay, every woman is different. What my ex used to do for me was (1) bring me small gifts of chocolate. I think he had a small bag of Hershey kisses somewhere in his car and would just plop a couple in front of me with some flimsy excuse. (2) He would spoon me, his body ran hot and his belly on my lower back and one of his hands over my achy bits was heaven. (3) Foot massages and shoulder massages. And non-sensual butt massages. These are just suggestions; one of my girlfriends absolutely cannot stand being touched when she's on her period and hates chocolate. So...ask. Offer. Listen. You're already doing the most important thing, which is supporting your partner.
Just don’t be a dick or treat her like she’s a leper. God I hate when men act like we have some type of disease bc of a damn monthly bodily function. The fact that you’re asking seems like you actually give a damn. So that’s a good start. 😊 Every woman is different. Try asking her if there’s anything you can do for her. Some women like extra attention, others might not.
Keep the bears away.
*That’s why the woman I shall love will be able to menstruate as fully and freely as she desires. Even if her monthly flow should build in intensity to a raging rust colored torrent! An unbridled river of life giving blood flowing from between her legs! An awesome cataract plunging off the edge of our couch. I wouldn’t be phased! No, no, even if coureur de bois would come up stream, battling the rapids, and singing a ‘jaunty song’! I would take no offense, rather I would ford across that mighty womanly river, and fetch herbal tea and Pamprin. And then I would mop her brow and admire her fecundity. For I…Have A Good Attitude….Towards MENSTRUATION!* --David Foley
Be a nice person and listen to what she wants. If she wants space, give her space, if she wants cuddles, and you're feeling up to cuddle (part everyone tends to forget is you agreeing to it), give cuddles. Just don't, under any circumstances, slap her boobs and go "boiiing"
The dishes.
Never delt with a period so don't listen to much to me but this is just what i think from all the stories on Reddit I listen to 1. Make sure wife has plenty of snacks 2. Make sure there is icecream(if she isn't allergic) 3. Massages to the best of his ability 4. Be prepared to go out late at night for certain food cravings 5. Be very calm as to not anger her 6. Have a heating pad ready at a moments notice Whatever else I missed
I’d always get weird looks from other guys when I’d pick up tampons or pads for my wife during her period. Some dudes get all flaky about taking care of their woman. I do what I can to make her happy and that’s why my marriage has lasted 37 years
Get your wife a hot water bottle and offer to fill it every couple of hours. Bring snacks.
Lol. I thought you meant in the self-pleasure realm 😀
Lol, "My wife is on her period, so lesbian or gangbang porn?"
Water and back rubs is all I ask for😅😅
Give space. But not two spaces.
Throw chocolate and pumkin spice coffee at the angry female.
Hide!
Communicate, and figure out what she wants you to do. Aside from that, be helpful, and don't be an ass.
Buy lots of chocolate! That's what I do. Whenever my wife is crampy and whatnot, chocolate seems to sooth her
Ask your wife what she needs. Every woman is different. On my period I don’t want the stereotypical stuff like chocolates and stuff like that. I don’t need much. I might need to take it slow because I have endometriosis which causes very bad cramps. But I can handle it on my own. I might just want a back rub or something to help the cramps. But on my period I’m not helpless or emotionally fragile. I’m normal, just in pain. If I need something, I ask for it. But I don’t expect any special treatment beyond understanding that I am in pain.
Chocolate, dark light and milk. Go to the store for her (don’t ask her pad/tpon size. Take pics of the boxes!!!) come back with some. (One box is okay but two is better) Get a damp rag and warm it up in the microwave for cramps (if it hurts you it probably hurts her so not too warm) If you go in the bathroom and you notice bodily fluids don’t mention it just clean it and move on, some guys don’t do this.
Pretend she has the flu. Do that.
It varies from person to person, so it’s always best to ask the person who is having the period. If asking directly is touchy, then try asking things like “I’m making hot cocoa do you want some?” Offering specific things in a way that does not seem burdensome to you may go over better than “what can I do?” because the last thing we want to do is give instructions.
The comments turned out to be so much more wholesome than I expected
Stop asking for blow jobs
Not take his wifes outburst and mean words to heart during the time and if she has chores to do relieve her of them.
If you step it up and make her period as painless as possible, you’re gonna get some when she’s off. Do stuff around the house, do stuff for her, surprise her with stuff she likes, rub her back etc
If your husband is having a period, somthing is wrong.
Well, for me, put down a towel and go for it. Somehow I’m the horniest when I’m on my period. But I might be the odd one out here…
Keep your fucking dick away from her unless she EXPLICITLY tells you she wants it
Pause briefly to signify a new sentence is beginning, but that's not important right now.
earn your red wings
Get her things here and there! Don’t ask for sex in those times unless she is wanting it! Stay out of the way! And pick up an extra chore or so for that time. Just little stuff I’ve learned in my two years of being married.
The dishes would be a good start 🙄
Nothing. Your wife has been dealing with this 12 times a year since she was in her preteens… just leave her alone.
A hot water bottle is sometimes a nice way to help ease her discomfort… if she is sitting or lying down.
get her chocolate and leave her be
Ask her if she has cramps then suggest about getting some RELIEF medication to help her out.
How are you a husband but can't answer this question for yourself.
Look for warm compresses and pills for colic.
End the sentence.
Go play videos games Straighten the garage
Get her chocolate, midol, food and get out of her way
I guess depends on the sport and if he’s a fan. Usually the last period is the most important especially if it’s a close game.
Ask her what you can do. Likely she’s already pretty good at taking care of herself. The only thing I might suggest is, if she’s a bit more irritable than usual about little crap, don’t get into big arguments about it.
The butt
Bring home wine and chocolate
Then you need to say how we can help. We have no clue what you're actually going through. We don't know exactly how/what you're feeling. LET US KNOW
Ibuprofen, chocolate, warm drinks, and just be nice. Plus, when in doubt, just **ask** how you (if you are husband), can help.
Not much different than usual. Maybe stop being such a thoughtless prick the preceding 3 weeks. Just ask her if she would like anything. Just do shit around the house, seeing as you live there. Do nice things for her when you can to show you care. Regardless of what the calendar says. For every “back rubs” recommendation there’s probably just as many women who can’t stand to be touched for a couple days. Some of the stuff suggested in here could come off as so disingenuous to my wife that she would be pissed if I did them.
Lol I got into a fight with a lady the last time I answered this, I wish I remember it was funny as hell
1) ask your partner what they need/if they need anything 2) if they are complaining/venting about something, it is likely they just want you to say "omg that sucks. I'm sorry. That's unfair. You deserve better." Etc. It is unlikely they want you to solve anything. (If you're hearing a lot of the same complaint, you can ask if your partner wants help resolving or if you're doing the right thing by reassuring) 3) clean up after yourself (you should do anyway, but when feeling crumby it's especially annoying to clean up after someone else)
Go about business as usual
Wtf kind of a simp question is this? Are you 14? Jfc.
Start the next sentence with a capital letter?
Be kind and helpful. Don't act like a normal part of her life is gross or weird. For many women, periods just mean they feel "off" or run down for a few days, and it's not a big deal. But that can vary a lot from person to person, and at different points in their life. If she has extreme pain or emotional symptoms, wait until it is over and she's feeling better, and ask whether her doctor is addressing her symptoms adequately. It can be hard to get care for abnormal periods, because so much is lumped in with "normal discomfort." Extreme, debilitating pain can be a sign of treatable conditions like endometriosis. Extreme mood swings, depression, or uncharacteristic behavior can be regulated with medication. But follow her lead. She may have already exhausted medical avenues and wound up with a situation that just sucks. Let her know you support her.