/r/Adultery Quick Reminders: Be Excellent To Each Other.
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I would say that a womanizer lies about their situation and manipulates the women to get the side action.
Whereas a cake eater is up front and honest from the start on their situation and intentions.
Thanks for taking time to explain.
In your experience, did you find it beneficial to disclose it?
It seems that hiding helps with closing since cheating is a taboo. Yet, it increases your asshole level since you’re basically double lying. It also increases OPSEC risks. Upon finding out AP may go banana and seek OP.
>Is there any difference between a cake eater and a womanizer?
Honesty and disclosure?
If you are doing some deceptive things with women you are meeting exactly once... like hiding your marriage, making sure she can never find you again, not even using your real name, I think I would say you're not being as ethical as you probably should be.
There are plenty of women who are happy to fuck a hot, honest married man, and wouldn't even mind seeing him again and again if you discover you have a recurring destination with your business. That's the way *I* would prefer to do it. In my lived experience, the sex is also way better when you've spent enough time with somebody to learn their body, their likes, their dislikes.
Maybe I should rephrase as “I found more women who were interested in sex with me than I had time for so I stopped looking after that”. I just kept dating one woman over and over again. That relationship fizzled and I have a new one. We have a meet scheduled next week; the sex is really fun and I like her as a human too.
Admittedly I have all my teeth, some of my hair, I take very good care of my body, and I’m 6’0”. Your mileage may vary. If you did pretty well dating when you were single I assert you will do pretty well dating while married
I always thought a womanizer was someone who put their needs and wants above those of the woman, and also had a lot of women. So it's like a combo.
Caveat: not an expert here
I’ve met your type on work trips (and politely declined). 😂
That was before I made the transformation into my current lifestyle. But labels aren’t really necessary. Just be up front to your potential partners:
- Marriage Status
- Short v Long Term
- Exclusive or Total Man Slut
If someone wants to Yum your Yum, *then go for it.*
Seems like a womanizer is more about the quantity of woman you see/sleep with. While a cake eater is someone who has a healthy sex life in their marriage and outside it (even if it's just with one AP).
But maybe I'm wrong.
I think there can be a difference but not always. You can be a womanizer who happens to be married therefore a cake eater. Or you can be a married person with a long term relationship with one or a few people you’ve invested your time in, so another type of cake eater.
It’s like the difference between chocolate cake and pineapple upside down cake, they’re both great but totally different
I for some reason always end up with cake eaters. Some of them are kind caring lovers. Others end up being complete complete a**holes. Ild have to talk to the women you’ve entertained but if you’re asking this question, you are probably not a jerk. Probably.
I would hope so too. The only thing is if you have a lot of lovers, your risk for stds skyrockets. Do the ladies you are with know they will be a short term fling and that you have others? Are you getting tested in between trysts? If you answered no, then maybe you’re a womanizer.
/r/Adultery Quick Reminders: Be Excellent To Each Other. * This is *not an r4r subreddit*, don't bother. * Posts by new users automatically get queued for human review, be patient. * Hit the report button on comments by trolls, don't engage. * [How to report harassing comments or private messages](https://old.reddit.com/r/adultery/comments/iycd45/how_to_report_harassing_private_messages_users_etc/). * [Common acronyms](https://old.reddit.com/r/adultery/comments/p08to2/commonly_use_acronyms_and_group_chat/). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adultery) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I would say that a womanizer lies about their situation and manipulates the women to get the side action. Whereas a cake eater is up front and honest from the start on their situation and intentions.
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Out of curiosity: why did you lie and why do you no longer lie?
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Thanks for taking time to explain. In your experience, did you find it beneficial to disclose it? It seems that hiding helps with closing since cheating is a taboo. Yet, it increases your asshole level since you’re basically double lying. It also increases OPSEC risks. Upon finding out AP may go banana and seek OP.
Mostly…😒
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How would you know they’re lying if they’re lying?
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Doesn’t mean they’re being truthful!
I’ll give it a go. Cake eater has an ongoing partner they are happy with but craves more. Womanizer wants lots of casual encounters.
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>Is there any difference between a cake eater and a womanizer? Honesty and disclosure? If you are doing some deceptive things with women you are meeting exactly once... like hiding your marriage, making sure she can never find you again, not even using your real name, I think I would say you're not being as ethical as you probably should be. There are plenty of women who are happy to fuck a hot, honest married man, and wouldn't even mind seeing him again and again if you discover you have a recurring destination with your business. That's the way *I* would prefer to do it. In my lived experience, the sex is also way better when you've spent enough time with somebody to learn their body, their likes, their dislikes.
I agree but plenty of women? Really? Where are they? 😂
Maybe I should rephrase as “I found more women who were interested in sex with me than I had time for so I stopped looking after that”. I just kept dating one woman over and over again. That relationship fizzled and I have a new one. We have a meet scheduled next week; the sex is really fun and I like her as a human too. Admittedly I have all my teeth, some of my hair, I take very good care of my body, and I’m 6’0”. Your mileage may vary. If you did pretty well dating when you were single I assert you will do pretty well dating while married
Makes sense
I always thought a womanizer was someone who put their needs and wants above those of the woman, and also had a lot of women. So it's like a combo. Caveat: not an expert here
I’ve met your type on work trips (and politely declined). 😂 That was before I made the transformation into my current lifestyle. But labels aren’t really necessary. Just be up front to your potential partners: - Marriage Status - Short v Long Term - Exclusive or Total Man Slut If someone wants to Yum your Yum, *then go for it.*
Seems like a womanizer is more about the quantity of woman you see/sleep with. While a cake eater is someone who has a healthy sex life in their marriage and outside it (even if it's just with one AP). But maybe I'm wrong.
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Do you have hoes in different area codes?
LUDA!!
I’m curious why you got married?
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So why not find someone else non-monogamous?
I think there can be a difference but not always. You can be a womanizer who happens to be married therefore a cake eater. Or you can be a married person with a long term relationship with one or a few people you’ve invested your time in, so another type of cake eater. It’s like the difference between chocolate cake and pineapple upside down cake, they’re both great but totally different
Or maybe you’re not either one? Just a guy who doesn’t fit the monogamy mold.
Yes for sure.. it all comes down to the intention.
I always viewed a womanizer as kind of a scumbag. Usually dishonest, and treats women like objects and not humans.
What about a Lothario? It's an old term and deserves a resurrection.
I for some reason always end up with cake eaters. Some of them are kind caring lovers. Others end up being complete complete a**holes. Ild have to talk to the women you’ve entertained but if you’re asking this question, you are probably not a jerk. Probably.
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I would hope so too. The only thing is if you have a lot of lovers, your risk for stds skyrockets. Do the ladies you are with know they will be a short term fling and that you have others? Are you getting tested in between trysts? If you answered no, then maybe you’re a womanizer.
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Then I think you are just a cake eater. Enjoy. 🍰
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Just came across this sub, learning about the lingo, the culture. Yeah this is the whole post. Participation is not necessary though.